


A Bird in Spring

by orphan_account



Category: Princess Tutu
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, F/M, Slice of Life, Slow Build, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-30
Updated: 2015-10-22
Packaged: 2018-03-09 17:27:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 31
Words: 277,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3258266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fantasy AU. When her guardian's death leaves her penniless, young orphan Ahiru Klein moves to a foreign land to become a witch's apprentice. But more than just work awaits her in the quiet forest town of Goldkrone, and over time she begins to realize that her loss of fortune was actually a stroke of luck in ways she could never have guessed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The sun rose slowly from amidst the clouds, transforming the sky from grey to dark blue to rosy pink  and then to blue again, though a lighter shade this time. Ahiru watched as it ascended, her gaze taking in how it illuminated the well-manicured gardens beneath the window, and then how it gleamed off the white roofs and walls of the buildings beyond. There was something, she realized, serenely magical about seeing dawn break over the city, and she regretted never having watched it before.

Normally she’d be in bed at this hour; not because she hadn’t had plenty of sleepless nights over the past few months, but she typically remained huddled under the covers until it was time to get up. As this was the last morning in which she could do this here, however, she’d broken with tradition. The finality of it all lent a quiet melancholy to the sight, but she nevertheless felt glad to have done it.

As she continued to stare out the window, she didn’t even realize that her eyes were falling until an insistent pounding at the door jarred her awake. “Ow…” Ahiru whimpered, rubbing her newly sore neck as she stumbled off the window seat and lurched towards the bedroom door in a groggy haze. She opened it to find Pike standing there, hands on her hips.

“ _Finally_ ,” Pike greeted her, not bothering to conceal her impatience. “What are you even _doing_ , Ahiru? Breakfast is over and Mama and Papa have both left for their engagements for the day, and you’re _still_ not even dressed? Even _you_ aren’t usually so late.”

“I… wh-what?” Sleepiness instantly converted to alarm. “It’s… I…” She struggled to think, recalling only watching the sunrise and then… what? A feeling of dread grew in her too. “I was awake, I couldn’t sleep, but then… oh no…”

“I’m afraid so.” Pike didn’t look the least bit sympathetic. “Lilie will be here shortly, so you’d better hurry and get dressed. Especially if you want to grab what’s left of breakfast before we head out.”

“I – I – y-yeah, I will!” Ahiru slammed the door shut in Pike’s face, and raced over to where she’d laid out the outfits she was going to wear today and tomorrow, the only articles of clothing that hadn’t been packed with the rest. She fumbled with the fastenings of her dress, which only fueled her panic, but at last was ready and yanked the door open again.

Pike had already gone back downstairs, and Ahiru rushed down too as carefully as she could, not wanting to slip and fall in her haste. She made her way to the breakfast room and found to her relief that none of the maids had cleared away the remnants of the morning meal. She gulped down some lukewarm tea and managed to plow through a few slices of cold toast and jam before the door bell rang; at that she finally swallowed down her last bite and wiped her mouth before standing and heading towards the foyer.

“Oh, my dear Ahiru!” No sooner had the butler opened the door than Lilie flung herself through it and onto Ahiru, squeezing her so tightly that she could barely breathe. “I cannot _believe_ this is our last day together! Oh, how will I survive without you here? How will you be able to function without me by your side? Woe! Woe is us!”

“Please, you act like none of us will ever see each other again.” Pike emerged from the parlor, rolling her eyes. “There’s always the option of visiting eventually, you know, once Ahiru gets properly settled. Perhaps in the summer, or even the spring?”

“Oh, but that’s too far away!” Lilie wailed. “I’ll simply _die_ without her company before then!”

Pike rolled her eyes again. “No, you won’t.” She moved over and gently disentangled the two, letting the wheezing Ahiru back away. “Don’t let her guilt you, Ahiru – she’s just as over dramatic as ever.”

“And you’re as heartless as ever!” Lilie sniffed. “You see, Ahiru? Do you see? That this sort of treatment is what you’re abandoning me to? Oh, the wanton cruelty!”

“Yes, says the person who nearly strangled her,” Pike muttered as she rubbed Ahiru’s back. “Come on – if we’re all done with this ridiculous pantomime, let’s get going. The day isn’t getting any younger.”

“Fine.” Lilie heaved a dramatic sigh before whirling on her heel and marching out the door. Pike and the still-coughing Ahiru followed her, and into the city they went for one final outing together.

They made a beeline for their usual haunts in the shopping district, perusing this and that in every store and oohing and aahing over new arrivals on the shelves. Ahiru felt a twinge of wistful envy at the way that Pike and Lilie were able to freely purchase whatever they wanted, but consoled herself with the thought that soon enough she would be making a small salary and could save up bits of it to buy things for herself in her new home. She’d never be as wealthy as these two, who could afford to ignore the displays of sale items and buy without a second thought the very latest and most expensive items, but at least it’d be _something_.

“Now, you’re _sure_ you have everything you need?” Pike asked her as they exited the book seller’s. “You’ve looked over the list that lady sent you?”

“Yes!” Ahiru nodded. “I – I just looked at it again last night and checked my stuff, a-and I brought it with me today to be sure.” She rummaged in her handbag and pulled out a neatly folded square of paper, which she promptly opened up. “See?”

It was true that the thin, loopy handwriting said at the top that these items were optional if she could not afford them, and not to strain her budget if she was unable, as they would be provided for her if she arrived lacking them. But Ahiru didn’t want to start out her apprenticeship in debt, or even _feeling_ like she was in debt, so she’d scraped together what little money she had and found good bargains on the few items listed beneath that note. She’d been instructed to buy, if possible, a protective over-robe and set of gloves, _An Introduction to Herbs_ , and note-taking supplies. All other tools and ingredients of witchcraft would be provided by Edel, her teacher.

“Hmmm…” Pike surveyed the list. “Yeah, I think I remember you getting all these… I’d hate to have you get on the coach tomorrow and realize you forgot something important.”

“Even if I did, she said she’d provide stuff for me.” Ahiru pointed to the note at the top. “She said I didn’t even have to buy all this if I couldn’t afford it… b-but I wanted to have my own, you know?”

“Yeah, I would too.” Pike nodded in understanding. “All right, I’m glad that’s all sorted then, apparently. Now we just have to buy you going-away presents.”

“Wh-what?” Ahiru’s eyes widened and her cheeks turned bright pink. “Y-you don’t have to do that, I – I don’t need any presents, really…”

“Maybe you don’t _need_ them, but we _wan_ t to get you something,” Pike said, looking faintly amused. “If it makes you feel any better, it won’t be anything too big that you’ll have a hard time fitting into your trunk – no last minute additions to worry over.”

Ahiru started to say that her trunk wasn’t that full to begin with, but decided against it. “W-well, I guess that’s good, but still… I feel bad…”

“You would.” Pike rolled her eyes, but smiled to belie the effect. “Come on, just let us do this – you’ve been such a good friend all these years, you deserve a little something as going-away gifts. It’s the very least we can do.”

“B-but you’ve already done so much!” Ahiru’s face felt hot. “Y-you took me in when I didn’t have anywhere to go, and helped me with everything, and… if anything, I owe _you!_ ”

“Nonsense.” Pike waved a hand dismissively. “I’d never turn away a friend in need, and neither would my parents. It’s just not right. And I know you’d do the same for me if our situations were flipped. Besides, Lilie here’s not done anything, so you should let her buy something, at least, to make up for it.”

“How rude!” Lilie exclaimed. “Who’s the one who’s comforted Ahiru all these years? Who’s the one who’s been there for her when she cried? Me!”

“Yes, and what a fine job you’ve done,” Pike muttered. “Not to mention all the times she’s needed comforting _because_ of you.” She slipped her arm through Ahiru’s. “Come on, I know already what I want to get you.”

“I’m not listening to these lies,” Lilie declared as she followed the two of them down the street. “We shall have to battle later, Pike, if there is time. I hate to subject Ahiru to the sight of such violence before she leaves, but you leave me no choice.”

Pike ignored her. “Ah, here we are!” she said loudly as they arrived at the shop she’d had in mind. Countless crystals twinkled at them through the window, and a bell over the door clanged cheerfully as she ushered Ahiru in ahead of her, Lilie following close behind with a pout on her pretty face. Behind the counter, the sharp-eyed shopkeeper looked up from his ledger, but relaxed when he saw that they were obviously young ladies of status and money. Ahiru noticed his manner change, and felt her stomach drop. If she’d chosen one of her shabbier gowns or looked a little different, would she be followed around the store? She’d seen other people get that treatment and thought it terrible. She tried to push it out of her mind so as not to start an uncomfortable conversation with her two friends who’d never had to think about such things.

“Pick whichever one you like.” Pike leaned down to examine a well-polished amethyst. “But don’t just pick based on color, choose one that will have beneficial effects for you that you want.”

 “I… you’re gonna get me one of these?” Ahiru’s eyes went wide again. There were so many on display, and each one bore a placard listing its properties, effects, and associations. How was she ever to choose? “I – I’ve never owned a crystal before…”

“Well, there’s no better time than the present to get your first.” Pike patted her arm. “Read the little cards carefully, and then decide.”

“And I’ll get you one too,” Lilie cooed. “So pick a second one as well, and make sure it’s good! It would be so _tragic_ to leave here with a badly chosen gem…”

“They’re all good,” Pike said, elbowing Lilie. “Just take your time, Ahiru.”

“O-okay…” Ahiru gulped. She knew it wasn’t really possible to make a “wrong” choice here, but she nevertheless felt a bit overwhelmed by the sheer amount of stones on display and how many options she had for effects she wanted. It took her the better part of an hour before she finally settled on an oval jewel that had a yellow hue to it reminiscent of honey. The little card beside it said that it was good for doing herbalist work – which would be the focus of her witchcraft training – and also that it would bring her luck in finding and keeping happiness.  After that it took another half hour to select a pale green one that was supposed to be good for garden-growing and stress relief, as well as aiding in the prevention of infections.

By the time both purchases had been wrapped in pretty pink tissue paper and stored safely away in her bag all three were hungry again, so they stopped for a small luncheon before heading back out into the city, this time to allow Ahiru one last glimpse of the many landmarks and attractions the city had to offer. She couldn’t help but feel like a sightseeing tourist, anxious to imprint everything she saw on her memory before she had to leave it all behind for a mundane life elsewhere.

 _Stop that,_ she told herself. _You’ll come back. You will. Once your schedule and budget allows for it you can make a trip here to visit Pike and Lilie and see everything again, and it’ll be like old times._

Except it wouldn’t be, not really. Would it? By that time she’d be settled in her new home, in the job she was due to begin soon, and she really would be a tourist the next time she came here. The city where she’d grown up would no longer be her home. And not just in the sense that she was leaving it tomorrow, either: she would by then truly regard the new town as her home, and this place would simply be one that she didn’t live in anymore, for all the memories it was steeped in. She had to blink away a few tears at that, and hoped neither of her friends noticed.

“Will you miss it?” Pike’s voice broke into her thoughts, and Ahiru jumped.

“Wh-what? Miss what?” she asked nervously, afraid that they’d seen her starting to cry.

“The house.” Pike gestured to the modest townhouse they’d paused in front of. “You never talk about it, so I was curious.”

“O-oh… that…” Ahiru turned to gaze up at it, hiding her relief that her moment of melancholy hadn’t been noticed after all. “I – I dunno… it wasn’t really…” She took a minute to gather her thoughts as memories swept across the surface of her mind, distracting her from the sad musings she’d just been dwelling on. It was a curious thing: despite her love for this city and her pangs at leaving it, little of that distress was actually linked to her years spent in the home they were standing before. “I mean, it was nice, but… Herr Drosselmeyer was kinda… well, when he was around, _he_ wasn’t that nice.” She shivered at the memory of her recently departed guardian. She hadn’t been at all sentimental about leaving his house, and had the distinct feeling that if he’d had more time for her over the years she might be less sentimental about leaving the city too. As it was, it was mainly her memories of time spent with Pike and Lilie that were tugging at her heart, as well as what few small recollections she had of her parents before their deaths.

“Yeah, I have to admit I didn’t really like him.” Pike repressed a shudder of her own. “It’s too bad you couldn’t have lived with us all those years ago… that would’ve been more fun for you, I bet.”

“Y-yeah, it would’ve been.” Ahiru swallowed; the words _and you might not be leaving now_ hung unsaid in the air. She didn’t know whether they were true or not, but either way didn’t have the heart to address them.

They continued to wander about until late afternoon, finally returning to Pike’s house as the sun began to draw down into the sky. Ahiru took her purchases upstairs to her room while Pike arranged for a maid to bring some tea and pastries into the parlor for them. She stared out her window at the sunset for a minute, and then hurried back downstairs to join her friends for one last afternoon tea.

“I really do wish you’d chosen something that wasn’t so far away,” Pike said with a hint of reproach in her voice as she poured some of the steaming, fragrant liquid into her cup after filling Ahiru’s for her.

“I _know._ ” Ahiru couldn’t keep the frown off her face, despite her own wistful mood earlier. “You keep _saying_ that.”

“Well, it’s as true now as it was when you first announced your plans.” Pike’s expression softened, however, and she patted Ahiru’s hand before pouring some tea for Lilie. “We’ll miss you, you know. Promise to write?”

“Of – of course!” Ahiru nodded. “I – I’ll write as much as I can, I promise!”

“Good.” Looking satisfied, Pike set down the teapot and took her seat again. “I’ll expect the letters to be detailed, I want to hear _everything_.”

“Yes yes, write long and detailed letters telling us about every mistake and failure.” Lilie’s eyes gleamed. “We’ll send you comforting words from afar, and though it won’t be the same as drying your tears for you in person it will be _something_ , at least. And if you have to flee in disgrace and return to your friends’ loving arms, all the better!”

“Wh-what?” Ahiru’s voice quavered. “You – you think I’ll mess up and fail at it?”

“I think you’ll do just _fine_ ,” Pike said, cutting off Lilie’s response and shooting her a glare. “As long as you work hard and don’t slack off, there shouldn’t be a problem. You’re an intelligent person, you just need to apply yourself and not get distracted or give up. No daydreaming when you’re supposed to be learning about herbs! And take notes! Study them at night before bed!”

“I know, I – I will.” Ahiru reached for a muffin, having finished adding sugar to her tea. “I bought that nice new notebook at Adler’s the other day like the list said to, remember? I’ll use that!” It had cost her more than she’d have liked of the little money she had to her name, but she’d been assured it was more than worth the investment and would last. She believed it, too – the notebook was nice and thick, with high quality paper and bindings, and had been spelled to be waterproof. And as a bonus, it had come with a good pen filled with erasable ink (an important feature for someone like her who frequently miswrote things, especially when in a hurry) and magic laid on it to prevent leaking. It’d serve her well in the days and weeks to come.

“That’s right, that’s right.” Pike took a bite of her own muffin, laden with a generous amount of butter and honey, and didn’t speak again until she’d swallowed down about half of it. “That said, if your teacher proves to be horrible in some way you can always come back here. You know that, right? My parents would never turn you away.”

“Horrible?” Ahiru frowned. “Horrible in what way?”

“Oh, for instance…” Pike waved her hand vaguely. “Cruel and abusive. Or a fraud. Those things do happen, you know. You have to be careful when answering advertisements from abroad. It’s much easier with apprenticeships in your own city, because you can visit their establishments and check their references with the locals.”

“I wasn’t able to find anything here, though.” Ahiru took a sip of her tea. “A-and I’m sure it’ll be fine, anyway, she seemed nice in the letter…”

“Of course she did.” Pike rolled her eyes. “Why would anyone wicked reveal themselves as such before they’ve lured you in? Seems counter-productive to their schemes to me.”

“Yes, yes, and then before you know it…” Lilie’s eyes sparkled. “You’re hunched over a bubbling cauldron making poisons for the most _dreadful_ old crone, who overworks you and threatens to throw you in her dungeon or even her ovens if you disobey her or make the slightest mistake, and then the prince comes to rescue you and cut her to pieces…”

“Oh please, Lilie.” Pike rolled her eyes again. “That’s just something out of one of those cheap horror novels, everyone knows real witches aren’t like that. Although the being rescued by a prince part doesn’t sound so bad, he’d probably want to marry you afterwards, that’s how all the soppy stories go.”

“I – I don’t think it’ll happen like that,” Ahiru said, a bit louder than was necessary, and she couldn’t hide the slight quaver in her voice. “Like you said, real witches aren’t like that.” She was tempted to add that she really doubted that _anyone_ would ever want to marry her, but she didn’t think she could take Lilie’s “comforting” over her unfashionable looks, not right now. “I think you’re just trying to scare me.”

“Lilie certainly is,” Pike said with a stern look at the other girl, who tried and failed to look innocent and angelic over the rim of her teacup. “I, meanwhile, just want you to be careful, you know? I mean it, if you do have to come back here because your teacher turns out to be awful somehow, there’ll always be a room open for you, and we’ll help you find some other occupation.”

“Thank you, but I think I’ll be fine.” Ahiru reached for a small cake laden with walnuts and golden raisins and covered in a thin pink glaze. “I – I can’t imagine my teacher being awful, and it sounds like a nice place to live, too, so… I think I should do okay.”

“So you’ve said about it, but…” Pike frowned. “It’s in the country, right? Maybe this is just me being a snob, but the idea of living full-time out in the country makes me a bit uneasy.”

“Why?” Ahiru tilted her head. “I thought your family had a country house?”

“We do, but we don’t live there full time.” Pike refilled her teacup, and reached for the tongs to add a sugar cube to it. “It’s lovely during the summer, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t think I could live there all year. There’s just something… _strange_ about some of these places far from the big cities.”

“That’s not really where I’m going, though,” Ahiru protested. “I mean, I know it’s kind of out in the country but it’s also a city? Not as big as this one, but it _is_ the capital of a principality so it won’t really be like being out in the middle of nowhere…”

“Yes, but… it’s also at the edge of a huge forest, right?” Pike barely repressed a shudder, and a similar shiver went through Lilie. “You could _not_ get me to live somewhere like that.”

“Why?” Ahiru’s nose crinkled in confusion. “What’s so bad about forests? I like trees, they’re pretty… what could be bad about lots and lots of them?”

“Oh, poor, naïve Ahiru,” Lilie cooed. “It’s not the _trees_ that are bad, it’s what’s _in_ them.”

“Wh-what?” Ahiru’s eyes widened. “Wh-what’s in them?”

“Fairies.” Pike took a sip of her tea, and then sighed. “Honestly, don’t you remember any of our lessons on the matter? The fairies don’t come into cities like this, so we’re safe, but if you go deep enough into a forest, or any place isolated enough, you’re bound to meet some. And you _never_ want to meet them.”

“Oh… oh yeah…” Ahiru shrank in her seat a little as the old tales she’d heard years ago came flooding back to her. “Do you… do you think I’ll see any?”

“Hopefully not.” Pike shuddered again. “Just be careful, you know? Don’t wander too far into the forest, avoid any standing stones, and _definitely_ don’t step into a fairy circle. That’s just _asking_ for trouble.”

“Mmmm, mmmm, yes.” Lilie nodded. “And maybe it’s a good thing you won’t be getting married, because if you do the fairies might steal your baby and replace it with one of theirs. And you’ll _never_ see your child again.”

“ _What?_ ” Ahiru’s fingers trembled so that she almost dropped her teacup; it landed on her saucer with a loud clink, and a few drops of lukewarm tea splashed up and dripped down the sides. “Th-that can happen?”

“ _Maybe_.” Pike sent a quelling glare in Lilie’s direction. “There are an awful lot of changeling tales, but there’s never really been any proof that it’s a thing that’s really done. And anyway there are plenty of precautions you can take, rituals to perform, that protect against that sort of thing. Even if it _is_ a thing, I think it’s rarer nowadays than it used to be, because magic has advanced so much over the past few decades. I think the fairies tend to keep to themselves more, though obviously you should still be very careful and not do anything to anger them. There’s no excuse for carelessness.”

“I guess.” Ahiru frowned down at the plate of pastries the Autenberg’s chef had prepared for their tea; her appetite suddenly seemed to have deserted her. “I… do you think it’s really a bad idea for me to go and live in a place like that? I – I didn’t realize I’d be in danger like that…”

“Oh, _Ahiru_.” Pike sighed. “Don’t misunderstand, I’d definitely prefer it if you stayed here, but part of that is just me being selfish. As long as you adhere to the local customs and don’t go _looking_ for fairies you should be fine. They’ll more than likely just stick to the heart of the forest. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to get carried away – I know this is important to you and I don’t want to get you unnecessarily frightened before you leave. I just want you to know the dangers and be careful, you know?”

“Y-yeah, I understand that.” Ahiru nodded again. “I – I promise I won’t go looking for them, they sound really scary…”

 “You’ll be all right, then.” She laid a comforting hand over Ahiru’s. “And people who live so close to the woods will know all the things to do to keep themselves safe, so you just have to ask, and I’m sure your teacher will be instructing you on such things as part of your training. Most of these stories are just wild exaggerations, anyway, and there’s usually perfectly ordinary explanations for things that people claim are the work of fairies. Why, I remember one summer there was a farmer who claimed that wicked fairies were stealing fruit from his orchards, but it turned out to be the work of local delinquents. If this really is the only apprenticeship you could find, then don’t let a bunch of old ghost stories scare you away from it.”

“Right, right,” Lilie agreed. “Especially because they’re not all _bad_ stories. I heard one once about a girl who fell in love with a handsome fairy prince who married her and gave up his immortality to live with her in the human world…” She sighed and clasped her hands to her face. “How romantic!”

“Now that I _really_ doubt.” Pike made a disdainful noise. “That sounds like a more modern story that romanticizes them and ignores how they really work, if there wasn’t some kind of price paid for such a thing and they got a happily ever after. I don’t think fairies are as big a threat to humans as they used to be, but we shouldn’t let ourselves get lax and think they’re harmless, either.”

“You spoil everything, Pike.” Lilie pouted. “You’re no _fun_.”

Pike sniffed. “I’d rather be sensible than fun, thank you. Particularly _your_ idea of ‘fun’.”

“Typical! And so rude…” Lilie sighed dramatically. “I –” She cut herself off, paling, as the clock began to chime to mark the changing of the hour. “Oh! Oh no!” She rose to her feet in a hurry, scattering crumbs all over the rug. “I’ve got to leave now!”

“What? Why?” Ahiru’s face fell. “Do you have to already? Can’t you stay longer?”

“I wish I could, but alas…” Lilie sighed again. “My parents are having that potential suitor I told you about over for dinner tonight, and I couldn’t get out of it, and they’ll be _so_ angry if I’m late.” She shuddered. “So I’d better get going and get ready. You do understand, right?”

“Y-yeah, I understand.” Ahiru nodded. And she really did, better than either of the other girls guessed. Life went on, and would continue to; an emotional distance would grow between them to match the physical one as her friends moved on with their lives without her around, adjusting so well to her absence that eventually she might as well not have been there at all, a novelty from times gone by that could be easily discarded and forgotten. She didn’t begrudge their moving forward and finding new joys in life, but she did feel a sharp pang at being unable to be included in them anymore. “Um, I – I guess this is goodbye, then?”

“Only until you come back for a visit! Or you fail at your apprenticeship and have to return in shame and be comforted by your friends as you weep and bemoan your tragic fate.” Lilie’s eyes gleamed, even as she stood and launched herself at Ahiru, who was just beginning to rise from her seat as well. “Oh, Ahiru, _do_ write often! And don’t be afraid to let your tears stain the page, it’ll make the letters even better!”

“I… y-yes… I…” Ahiru struggled to form words as Lilie’s embrace squeezed the air out of her. “I’ll… write a lot…”

“Good!” Lilie released her, and then planted a kiss on her cheek. “Farewell, Ahiru! We’ll never forget you, even if you _are_ kidnapped by fairies!”

“Oh, just get _going_ ,” Pike muttered, scowling as she pried Lilie away from Ahiru and led her to the door. “And tell your parents hello for me.”

“Naturally,” Lilie said. “And –”

Whatever she would have said next found itself cut off as Pike closed the door with a sigh. “Well, that’s her rid of,” she announced to Ahiru. “Please, don’t take any of her nonsense to heart. Now, are you all packed and ready to leave tomorrow?”

“Y-yeah,” Ahiru said, nodding. “Everything’s all in my trunk except for what I’m going to wear tomorrow. A-and what I’m wearing now,” she added, a bit unnecessarily.

“Yes, I gathered that,” Pike said dryly. “If we’re done with tea, then I’ll ring for the maid to clean up, and we can relax until dinner.”

“I – I’m done.” Ahiru glanced at the table. Most of the pastries had been left untouched, and she felt a twinge of guilt over the wasted food; she consoled herself by thinking that the servants would likely divide them amongst themselves, and that she’d probably better save her appetite for dinner anyway.

“All right, then let’s go have a walk in the garden or something while this is taken care of.” Pike walked to the parlor door, and rang the bell beside it that would summon one of the maids to clear away the dishes and uneaten food.

“O-okay, that sounds good.”

Once the maid had come bustling in and had been instructed to clean up after them, Pike led Ahiru into the modest but lovely garden her family maintained behind the house. They wandered round the paths more than once, chatting about recent gossip and myriad ordinary things, and at times Ahiru almost believed that it _was_ a usual afternoon, and not the last such she would spend in this house, with her lifelong friend.

She would miss it here. That thought kept intruding on her all through the walk and during dinner with Pike and her parents afterwards. She’d only lived here a couple of months, but the Autenbergs had been so kind to her, and Pike had always been her friend, and this city had been her home since birth – it was only natural to feel sorrow at leaving it all. Pike was a good friend, tough and stern but caring, and she knew that behind her bluster and scolding she was genuinely concerned about letting her move off by herself to a strange city in a foreign land, taking an apprenticeship with someone neither of them nor anyone else amongst their social circle knew anything about. And truth be told, she was a bit nervous about it all too.

What choice did she have, though? When Herr Drosselmeyer had died, she’d had all of what felt like five minutes of believing she was still secure and would be able to stay in the house where she’d spent the majority of her childhood after her parents’ deaths. That illusion had been rapidly shattered when a bevy of creditors arrived before he’d had even been laid in the ground, demanding payment for his many debts. Debts he’d kept well-hidden from her for years… debts that had wiped out not only his own inheritance as the son of a once prestigious family of clockmakers, but also what little there was left of the money he was supposed to have been keeping safe for _her_ , as well as most of the profits made from selling the house and nearly all of their combined possessions. Rendered penniless, with little money in her pockets and few remaining belongings, what choice did she have but to find herself an occupation somewhere? Pike’s parents had been generous in agreeing to take her into one of their guest rooms when Pike had asked them to, but she knew the arrangement couldn’t be permanent, so she’d sought out some sort of apprenticeship that would allow her to provide for herself for years to come. And just when she’d begun to despair of ever finding something, an advertisement from Goldkrone, the capital of the neighboring Schwangau Principality, had appeared in the local newspaper, asking for a young lady who wished to be instructed in the arts of witchcraft. Ahiru had leapt at it, mailing a letter off to the placer of the ad the same day, and waiting anxiously for a response. After so many rejections she’d finally received a letter of acceptance, much to her relief, and had immediately begun making preparations to leave according to the instructions contained in the missive.

Now the day had come, or nearly so at least. Pike and her parents would take her down to the station to board a coach early tomorrow morning, and with her single trunk of possessions she’d leave the place she’d grown up in behind, setting out into the unknown. After a journey of roughly two days the coach would arrive at its destination, and she would meet for the first time the woman who was to be her instructor in her new career. She only hoped that Pike’s worries were groundless, and that none of the disturbing tales about fairies she’d been regaled with this afternoon were really true. She didn’t want to think about that before going to sleep, though, so she forced herself to concentrate on pleasant things as she checked over everything one last time and then doused the lamp.

She didn’t climb right into bed, however, instead staying up at the window long enough to watch the moon rise high into the sky amongst twinkling stars whose glow was dimmed by the city lights and gathering clouds alike. Only when her eyes started to fall did she reluctantly close the curtains and huddle under the sheets. She remained awake for a little while after that, her mind still occupied by lingering worries, but before too long she successfully pushed her thoughts away and drifted off into a dreamless sleep that lasted until dawn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As the series canon is set in Germany, I have selected German surnames for the characters, and will provide the meanings when new ones are introduced.
> 
> Autenberg: Variant of Auttenberg. Possibly means "dweller at Ealdwine's hill" from the Germanic name Ealdwine meaning "old friend" and berg meaning "hill, mountain".  
> Klein: Means "little" from German _klein_.  
>  Schwangau: From a town in Germany that means "swan land".


	2. Chapter 2

Shades of pale pink and orange still streaked the skies in abundance as the Autenbergs took Ahiru to the station the next morning. They arrived well in advance of the scheduled departure of the coach she was to take to Goldkrone, but that was a thing to be grateful for as none of them had any experience with navigating public transport and thus needed plenty of time to find the right coach and make sure everything was in order. In Ahiru’s case, she’d never had the opportunity to travel for various reasons; as for Pike and her parents, they’d always been wealthy enough to own their own carriage, so the idea of traveling with strangers was an entirely foreign concept to them.

“I hope your journey is safe and pleasant,” Pike said as she hugged Ahiru. Like Lilie she was fond of tight hugs, but unlike Lilie’s embraces they didn’t feel life-threatening, as they allowed the recipient to easily breathe. “And not too uncomfortable,” she added. “We regularly get our carriage seats reupholstered so they’re not so hard on you over long trips, but who knows how often that gets done for these things?”

“I – I’m sure it’ll be fine,” Ahiru said, her stomach churning with discomfort. “Besides, we’ll be making stops for food and relieving ourselves and to stay at an inn tonight, so it shouldn’t be too bad.”

“That’s a relief to hear.” Pike pulled back. “Just… be careful, all right? Some of these roadside establishments can be a little seedy, I’ve heard.”

“I – I will. Don’t worry.”

Pike’s parents bid her farewell next, and then it was time for her to board the coach with the other passengers. By some measure of luck, she wound up beside the window that she could see Pike and her parents through, with one person beside her and two others opposite. The worn, faded seats were a bit lumpy in places and sank down lower than perhaps they ought, but overall weren’t nearly as uncomfortable as Pike had fretted, and Ahiru relaxed a little into them as she waited for the drivers to finish checking over everything. It took several more minutes, during which the station clock chimed to mark the new hour – the one they were meant to leave promptly at – but at last everything was deemed safe and secure and ready to make way. Ahiru waved at the Autenbergs one last time from the window of the coach as they took off, straining to make her last glimpses of the place that had been her home for the first eighteen years of her life last as long as possible.

Only when they’d left the city limits – and thus recognizable territory – behind did Ahiru settle back down in her seat, interested in learning more about her fellow passengers before she resumed looking out the window. The current scenery was nice, but a bit bland and featureless, and she couldn’t help but be curious about the others going to Goldkrone with her.

The tall, dark-skinned young woman beside her, Ahiru learned, was named Anne-Erina Hoch, and she spoke excitedly about going to Goldkrone to do research for her latest novel, and perhaps she would write it there as well. Ahiru had never heard of her previous books, but she promised to look them up as soon as she was able. The elderly man sitting across from her mumbled his name too low to be understood, and she felt too shy to ask him to repeat himself and speak up, but she did learn from his conversation with Anne-Erina that he was visiting family in Goldkrone.

The other man, who sat across from Anne-Erina, was easily the least pleasant of the group. In between adjusting his gold-rimmed monocle so that it would catch the sunlight _just right_ , he loudly expounded on how _dreadful_ public travel was and how he wouldn’t even _be_ on this coach if it weren’t for the fact that his own carriage was in the process of being refurbished. He then felt the need to tell them about said refurbishments in excruciatingly pompous detail, right down to the exact thread he demanded to have the new cushions sewn with (complete with diatribe about why it was superior to all other threads available). After that he took to complaining about everything about the trip that he possibly could; it was a mark of how irritating he was that even when he had a legitimate complaint they felt reluctant to agree with him.

Stopping for lunch came as a welcome respite, therefore. The coach pulled up at a rest stop that had been constructed at the outskirts of a larger city; it contained a few shops where travelers on long journeys could resupply themselves with various items, a couple of small restaurants, and even a tiny inn. Ahiru and the other passengers headed to the restaurant, and spent about an hour or so relaxing and enjoying the midday meal before climbing back into the coach. The wealthy man predictably complained about the quality of the food, but it soon became obvious that it must not have been bad enough for him to reject it and go hungry, for he then switched complaints to how heavy and overly filling “low class” food was in between deep yawns, a rant they were all grateful to have silenced when he dozed off to sleep.

While both male passengers napped Anne-Erina pulled out a notebook to do some work in, and Ahiru returned her attention to the scenery outside the window. They’d passed by that larger city and now were making their way through farmland, with vast fields of crops stretching out on either side of the coach track. Every once in a while she glimpsed a farm worker or two, and when they went past an orchard saw several men and women hard at work harvesting apples. She wished they could stop off and sample some of them, for they tasted best at this time of year. Some people in the city maintained greenhouses where they grew apples year-round through magical means, but there was always a sort of artificiality to the way they tasted, a side effect of the ripening spells used. Ahiru much preferred the apples that grew naturally and were imported from country farms at this time of year, during the lovely first weeks of autumn as the days grew shorter and cooler and the leaves began to turn their green hues into gorgeous shades of orange and gold and red.

As the afternoon wore on and they passed out of the farmlands into wilder country, the skies changed steadily from blue to grey, clouds gathering up and blotting out the sunlight that had been so bright that morning. It seemed ready to rain at any minute, but the weather remained relatively dry save for some light evening mist that hung in a thin haze over them as they drew up to where they’d stop for the night. A small town of sorts had sprung up on either side of the coach track, offering various shops and other establishments to accommodate travelers, and behind them the people that maintained these businesses kept their homes.

A night’s lodging had been included in the price of the coach tickets, but not meals, and so Ahiru opted to eat in the inn’s common room rather than go to one of the restaurants as the others had, as it would be cheaper. The wealthy man who’d so annoyed them all up to this point sniffed disdainfully at her, but she ignored him, especially as he then turned to loudly bemoaning the fact that he would probably not find acceptable cuisine here either. It would be good to be away from him, and it was with no small amount of relief that she sat down by herself at a small table at the far corner of the common room and opened up the menu for perusing.

Ahiru found herself pleasantly surprised by the inn’s offerings. It wasn’t the most extensive menu, but the dishes sounded better than she’d expected. She’d had a notion – fuelled by lazy, derivative novelists, no doubt – that the main, and often only, dish offered by such establishments was a bowl of stew of dubious origins and questionable quality. She scolded herself for being taken in by stereotypes and tales told by snobs, and then set about making her choice. The prices, she noted with delight, were low enough that she could treat herself to a cup of hot cocoa for dessert.

The beds, too, were more comfortable than she might have been led to believe, and the room was neat and clean despite being a bit shabby round the edges, with scratches in the wood and chipped and faded paint. There was nothing at all really wrong with the inn as a whole, Ahiru reflected as she climbed under the covers and doused the lamp. People like that wealthy man and even Pike and Lilie and their families tended to turn their noses up at places and things that weren’t as grand and opulent as they were used to, and at the same time also managed to look _down_ their noses at the people associated with those places. She loved Pike and Lilie, but at the same time she couldn’t help but wonder what sort of opinion they’d have of her if she’d always been poor, instead of merely having fallen on hard times after growing up in ease and comfort. Herr Drosselmeyer hadn’t been the richest man, and her inheritance from her parents hadn’t been excessive, but they’d had just enough money and status that wealthier people like the Autenbergs had considered her of a high enough class to associate with. She doubted very much that things would’ve been the same had she been penniless from the start, however, rather than having had her status lowered by sheer misfortune. All in all it wasn’t a pleasant thing to dwell on, so she tried to refocus her mind on what she’d read in _An Introduction to Herbs_ a little while earlier.

Somewhere in between alder and arrowroot she drifted off, and did not wake up until one of the drivers of the coach came by to knock on her door and inform her that they were leaving within the hour. Her mind clouded by sleep and the vague memories of disquieting and surreal dreams, Ahiru stumbled out of bed and dressed herself, making sure not to forget to repack any of the few belongings she’d removed from her trunk the night before. After seeing that everything was secure she headed downstairs, where she had just enough time to eat a quick breakfast in the common room before the coach departed.

A heavy mist hung over everything, and seemed only to grow thicker as the day went on, with no sign of the sun. Ahiru soon found herself grateful for her foresight in putting her cloak on before they left, for the weather became chillier rather than warmer even as midday approached, and a light rain had already started to fall by the time they stopped for an early lunch at another small rest stop. Complaints about the effects of the damp weather on his fine clothes by the wealthy man were summarily ignored by Ahiru, Anne-Erina, and the elderly man; indeed, they’d learned early on yesterday to simply tune him out as best they could, for there was no point to engaging him unless you _wanted_ to become angry and frustrated.

The trees, too, grew steadily thicker around them as the day wore on, and it soon became apparent why luncheon had been taken early when it became obvious that the coach track was now passing through a vast and foggy forest. Ahiru shrank back into her seat when she saw what looked like a pair of golden eyes with an inhuman shape to them peering back at her from between the mist-shrouded trees. Pike and Lilie’s talk of fairies in the woods came rushing back to her, and she hoped fervently that she’d only seen some strange animal, and that their passage would continue to be safe and unhindered.

She hadn’t given any thought to human danger, however, and that was what ended up befalling them in the end, rather than any sort of attack from otherworldly beings. As they rode up to a crossroads that lay in a large clearing in the forest, a loud, rough male voice ordered the coach to halt. “And don’t try any funny business!” it added, with a laugh that didn’t sound remotely friendly.

“Wh-what’s going on?” Anne-Erina whispered, her dark eyes going wide with fright. Across from her, the wealthy man had gone as pale as death, while the elderly one somehow remained asleep, at least until the coach jerked to a sudden halt.

“Bandits!” the rich man hissed, his hands shaking as he pulled his monocle off and shoved it into his breast pocket. “It must be! Oh, we’re done for…”

Ahiru’s mouth fell open in horror, but she didn’t get the chance to say anything before the coach door was yanked open by a tall, pale-skinned man with yellow hair and cruel grey eyes. “Out, all of ya,” he snapped at them. “And don’t dawdle.”

He stepped back, and with dread building the four passengers obeyed, climbing carefully out of the coach. As they did, they found that a large group of dangerous-looking men had emerged from the mist to completely surround them, each one bearing some sort of weapon that they brandished in their direction. At the front of the coach, both drivers had been forced down from their seats and were kneeling in front of a burly, bearded man who Ahiru guessed must be the leader of the bandit gang. Her stomach churned and her heart raced with terror – what was going to happen to them?

“Bah, most of these don’t look like they have any wealth on them,” said the man who’d opened the coach door, now inspecting the passengers. He looked Ahiru and Anne-Erina up and down with a stare that somehow managed to be lewd and disdainful at the same time. “’Although…” He dipped his hand into the wealthy man’s pocket, and pulled out the monocle with a grin. “Maybe they’re all hiding stuff up their sleeves. Might be worth searching ‘em for.”

“Don’t – don’t you _dare_ think about touching me,” Anne-Erina said, trying to sound brave even as her voice quavered and her hands shook where she clutched her notebook to her chest. “Or –”

“Or what?” The man stepped closer to her, and his breath stank badly enough that Ahiru got a faint whiff of it from where she stood beside Anne-Erina. “You think you’d get away with anything? Ha!” He let out a cold laugh that sent shivers of revulsion down both their spines. “All right then, we’ll start with –”

Wherever that sentence had been headed they mercifully never found out, as his voice was abruptly drowned out by the sound of hooves pounding across the ground in their direction, and the ruffian who’d climbed atop the coach to inspect the luggage cursed. “ _Shit!_ It’s the royal guards! To arms, you lackwits!”

The bandits scarcely had time to react to that before several men and women on horseback burst into the clearing, swords drawn and bows at the ready. Everything descended into chaos at that point, with the criminals trying desperately to either fight off the knights or escape, depending on how brave or loyal they were, and the passengers and drivers of the coach tried simply to stay out of the way and not get hurt themselves. Anne-Erina grabbed Ahiru’s hand and yanked her away from the leering man, but they got separated in the midst of the fray. Ahiru dodged around knights and bandits alike, trying to find Anne-Erina in the mist, and soon found herself backing into a tree just clear of the fighting. The pale man who’d menaced Anne-Erina and stolen the rich man’s monocle spotted her first, however, and made a beeline for her, likely in an attempt to claim her as a hostage against the knights, who were handily winning the battle.

Just before he reached her, though, one of the knights rode swiftly up to block his path, and Ahiru saw him swing his sword once before moving on. She didn’t hear what happened, not over the din of clashing swords and hoof beats and screaming bandits, but when the knight had ridden away she saw the man who’d been coming at her lying still on the ground, blood pouring onto the dirt from his slashed throat. She shuddered and turned away from the grisly sight.

Before too long the bandits had been thoroughly routed, those that hadn’t managed to run off into the woods lying dead on the ground. The knights then began to dismount from their horses and check on the condition of the thieves’ intended victims. Ahiru, who’d sunk down onto the ground as she saw the last bandit race off into the forest in the opposite direction, leaned her back against the tree and watched. To her relief, everyone was more or less unhurt. The elderly man had managed to climb back into the coach, and both drivers had stayed with the horses to keep them from bolting. Anne-Erina was shaken but seemed unhurt and was being seen to by a friendly-faced female knight, while the wealthy man bawled about the loss of his precious monocle, which had gotten trod on by a horse after the thief had dropped it as he died.

More than a little shaken herself, Ahiru lowered her head onto her knees and tried to keep from vomiting. Everything had happened so fast – the coach being stopped, the knights riding up, and then the chaotic battle – that she was still in a bit of shock over it all, and her body wouldn’t stop trembling. What if the knights hadn’t happened to be there just now? What would’ve happened to them all? Would she ever have seen Goldkrone and started her new life? Her eyes burned and she felt a sob bubble up in her throat.

“Are you all right?”

“H-huh?” Ahiru lifted her head to see one of the knights standing over her. He was tall, with light brown skin and long black hair tied back with a blue ribbon, and his deep green eyes held a faint, if impersonal, concern as he stared down at her. “I… I um… I guess…”

“Can you stand?” He held out one of his gloved hands. “Are you injured? We’ll take you to a healer if you need medical attention.”

“N-no, I… I mean… I’m not hurt.” Ahiru shook her head, and after a moment of hesitation reached up to take his hand. Her legs felt shaky after all she’d been through, so it didn’t hurt to have him help her up. “I, I, um…” It finally registered that this was the same knight who’d ridden up to kill the bandit that had been running in her direction, and she realized she needed to thank him for it. “You… th-thank you for, for helping us… for helping me…”

He shrugged. “It’s nothing, I was just doing my duty. Do you need help with anything else?”

Ahiru shook her head again. “N-no…”

“Then I have to report to my liege.” He let go of her hand and then turned and walked away.

“Your…” Ahiru’s voice trailed off as she watched him walk over to a young man with feathery white hair who wore clothes far more fine than the others, and when the knight who’d helped her bowed to him it dawned on her with a jolt that none other than the prince of Schwangau had been riding with the knights. She goggled at the two for a moment before the sound of additional horses approaching the crossroads caught her attention; turning, she saw two more knights enter the clearing, leading a couple of horses that had a slain deer and a large dead boar, respectively, strapped to their backs. _A hunt_ , she realized. The prince and his knights had gone on a hunt, and had happened to return at just the right moment to drive off roving bandits who were in the middle of attacking a coach. What luck for it all to have worked out like that! She shuddered again at the thought of how badly things might have gone if the timing hadn’t been so good.

Once everyone had been seen to and the luggage secured again, it was time to resume the trip. The prince apologized to them for their encounter with the bandits, and promised that he and his knights would henceforth work harder to make the area safe. In the meantime, they would escort them the rest of the way into Goldkrone.

The mood inside the coach was significantly more subdued as they rode into town; the elderly man was silent, Ahiru and Anne-Erina wordlessly held each other’s hands in a show of mutual support, and even the wealthy man found nothing at all he wanted to say (which made Ahiru wonder if one of the knights had given him a stern talking-to that got through to him). When they arrived at the station just inside Goldkrone the two men headed off in their respective directions without so much as a word of goodbye, but Ahiru and Anne-Erina shared a hug before the latter walked away.

Left alone with her single trunk, Ahiru sank down onto a bench to wait for her new teacher. Her knees still felt a little wobbly, and nausea threatened to make her small lunch come back up her throat, which was already burning with indigestion brought on by stress and fear. In such a state she found it easy to worry after waiting for only two minutes if she was going to be left alone and forgotten at the station, and fresh tears started to fill her eyes. If no one showed up she had nowhere to go here, and couldn’t afford fare back plus the cost of meals. What would become of her?

“Ahiru Klein?” A soft, gentle female voice spoke her name, and Ahiru looked up to see the owner. A woman with light green hair in an elaborate updo and a lavender gown stood there, a piece of paper in her pale hands. “Is that your name?”

“Y-yes!” Ahiru leapt to her feet, her relief so intense that she nearly burst into tears. “Th-that’s me! A-are you Miss Steuben?”

“Please, call me Edel.” She smiled and extended a hand to Ahiru, who saw now that the piece of paper she held was unmistakably the letter she’d sent off after receiving the note of acceptance, the one that contained a description of what she looked like. She’d written so much in her joy and gratitude at having finally gotten a positive response that it continued onto the other side of the paper, and it was easy to recognize her own handwriting. “It’s lovely to meet you at last, Ahiru. Did you have a good journey?”

“I… I… um…” Ahiru’s lower lip trembled, and she couldn’t keep the tears in any longer, even as she took Edel’s hand and shook it. “M-mostly…”

“Oh dear… what’s wrong?” Edel let go of Ahiru’s hand and touched her cheek. “What’s upset you so? Homesickness?”

“N-no… I mean…” Ahiru took a great, gulping breath. “I guess I’m probably a little homesick, or I will be, not that I don’t think I’ll be happy here, but, but anyway… wh-when we got here, o-or when we were almost here, really, there were these bandits that attacked and I d-didn’t know if we were gonna be okay and then the prince and his knights showed up and they drove them off b-but what if they hadn’t gotten there in time?” She took another deep breath and wiped at her eyes. “S-sorry… it was just… really scary…”

“No need to apologize.” Edel took both of Ahiru’s hands in hers and squeezed them. “You’ve been through a frightening and traumatic experience, it’s perfectly natural to be upset. Come – let’s get you home, I’ll make some tea and you can relax before I show you around.”

“A-all right.” Ahiru sniffled a little, and then reached for her trunk. Edel beat her to it, however, and simply shook her head when Ahiru opened her mouth to protest.

“My home isn’t far from here, so we’ll walk,” Edel said as she led Ahiru out of the station. “The city is small enough, in fact, that we will be able to walk everywhere without tiring overmuch. It makes things convenient.”

“Oh. I – I guess it would be…” Ahiru fell silent, not sure what else to say.

As Edel had said, the walk was indeed short. If anything, it felt slightly like backtracking, for Edel’s home lay not in the heart of Goldkrone, but on the edges of it, not far from the forest that evidently surrounded a good portion of the city. A wide, single-story house made of dark brown stone and wood sat in the shadow of an immense oak tree, and Ahiru felt something inside her unfurl and relax at the sight of it. It was the coziest looking home she’d ever seen, and something about it made her feel a little safer and warmer before they’d even walked in.

The smell of flowers and herbs greeted her as they walked in, and Edel took her without delay to the bedroom that had been set up for her. It wasn’t as large as the guest room she’d occupied at Pike’s house, but it didn’t need to be. A chest of drawers with a small mirror mounted on it sat against the wall to the right, while against the left stood a few bookshelves and a desk with a chair, all crafted of the same beautiful reddish-brown wood. Beneath their feet a plush blue rug covered the entirety of the floor, and against the far wall sat a four-poster bed with linen sheets and a neatly folded quilt at its foot. Above the bed was a large, low window; it had been opened to let in fresh air, but thankfully was also fitted with a screen woven from nearly translucent thread to prevent bugs and animals from coming in. The curtains fluttered in the rain-scented breeze, and Ahiru felt like she could breathe easier now as she took it all in.

“I’ll leave this here and you can unpack later,” Edel said as she set the trunk down near the bed. “If you’ll follow me to the kitchen, I’ll get you that tea.”

“A-all right.” Ahiru followed her, pausing to take a look back at her new bedroom before she left. She couldn’t help but like it better than the one she’d stayed in at Pike’s house, and she also preferred it to the one she’d had at Herr Drosselmeyer’s house. It wasn’t as fancy as either of those rooms, and no doubt her friends would turn their noses up at how plain and rustic it felt. But she liked it precisely _because_ it was those things, because it felt cozier and homier than either of those other bedrooms. Maybe it was a bit early to feel this way when she hadn’t even been here an hour, but even so a certainty was growing in her: this really was a place she could live and call home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hoch: Means "tall" in German.  
> Steuben: Means "dweller by a stump of a large tree".


	3. Chapter 3

It took Ahiru the better part of two cups of Edel’s hot, soothing herbal tisane to feel relaxed and calm enough to resume the tour.  In between sips she told her about the more pleasant parts of the trip, focusing on her conversations with Anne-Erina, and regaling her with the most ridiculous bits of the wealthy man’s behavior for them to laugh at. Once she felt ready, the cup she’d used was placed beside the kitchen sink for cleaning later on, and Edel continued showing Ahiru around.

The bedroom she’d been given was one of a handful on that side of the house, and all were furnished and kept clean. “I have guests on occasion – well, perhaps guest isn’t the right word, when they come in here due to illness or injury for emergency tending,” Edel corrected herself. “It helps to have a room ready and waiting for them. In addition, I move out of my regular quarters and into a room beside theirs, so that if they are in sudden need of me I do not have to travel as far to reach their side.”

“What about during the day, when you’re working or eating?” Ahiru asked.

“They are given this to use.” Edel picked up a small bell from the bedside table. “When they ring it, the sound instead emanates from its twin, which I keep with me at all times.”

“Oh. That sounds handy.” As soon as the words were out of her mouth, Ahiru cringed. Of _course_ it was handy, that’s why she did it, what a _ridiculous_ thing to say. _She_ was so ridiculous.

If Edel noticed that she was mentally chastising herself, she didn’t show it. “Yes, it is. Come, let’s move on.”

She didn’t get to see inside Edel’s normal bedroom, but merely had the location made clear so that she knew where to find her in the middle of the night in case of an emergency of some sort, like a patient being brought in. After that she got shown the small sitting room where guests were received, the larger library that doubled as a study, and of course the room where they’d be doing Ahiru’s witchcraft lessons. Lastly, a creaky old staircase led down to the basement where herbs and flowers were hung to dry before being carefully labeled and stored with the other potion ingredients on neat and well-organized shelves.

“You must be hungry by now,” Edel said as they moved back up the stairs to the main house. “I’ll fix us some dinner, and you’re free to do whatever you like until then. I’ll call you when it’s ready.”

“O-okay.”

After a moment of consideration Ahiru chose to go back to her room and unpack her trunk. Tempting though it was to poke around the library she knew she needed to get this done, and that she likely wouldn’t feel much like it after dinner. Better to get it over with now. She carefully refolded her clean clothes and put them in the chest of drawers, and tossed the dirty ones into the hamper Edel had provided. She finished by arranging her few other belongings on top of the desk and chest of drawers.

She’d just settled down on her bed to look through _An Introduction to Herbs_ when Edel called her to dinner. They ate at the old wooden table in the kitchen, another entirely new experience for Ahiru. At Herr Drosselmeyer’s and the Autenberg’s, eating in the kitchen was strictly for servants, and family meals were taken without exception in the formal dining room. Or rooms, in the case of the Autenberg’s house – their house was large enough to have separate ones for breakfast and lunch/dinner. Ahiru again found herself preferring what was going to be her new routine; she’d never quite felt comfortable, after all, with the level of excess and extravagance that was Pike’s daily life, all the things that the other girl took for granted as the markings of ‘good society’. This kitchen wasn’t nearly so fancy, but despite being on the large side it felt cozy and warm, and the windows opposite the table offered a nice view of the garden and the old oak tree behind the house. These were much more comfortable and lovely to gaze at than expensive wallpaper and richly upholstered chairs that she was afraid to spill anything on. Money, Ahiru felt, was a good thing to have for security and peace of mind, but she didn’t much care for the attitudes and aesthetic tastes that so often seemed to go hand in hand with possession of it.

After dinner had been eaten and the plates cleared away and washed Ahiru found she was too tired after her long and exhausting – and also terrifying – day, and so she retired to her room. Edel was more than understanding, and bid her goodnight with wishes to sleep well. She didn’t bother reading anything more from her new textbook and instead merely changed into a nightgown and turned out the lamp, hoping that she wouldn’t suffer any nightmares about her horrible experience with the bandits.

If she dreamed of anything at all, she didn’t remember it; and indeed her feeling when she woke up to a crisp autumn breeze tickling her face was one of contentment. Ahiru had left the window above her bed open just a tiny sliver the night before and now was rewarded with a morning breeze bringing her the scents of homegrown herbs and wildflowers. Yawning, she opened it the rest of the way, and leaned her elbows on the sill. Her room was located at the back corner of the house, near the kitchen, and so she was afforded a lovely view of the garden, and the old oak tree, and the edge of the forest beyond. Today had dawned clear and bright, a marked contrast with yesterday’s heavy fog and drizzling rain, and she took a few minutes to simply bask in the feeling of sunlight and fresh, pleasantly scented air on her face before reluctantly climbing out of bed to ready herself.

She unbraided her long hair and brushed it a little before putting it up in a bun, where it would stay out of her way while she learned and worked today. She then changed into a fresh chemise and her plainest gown, with the protective over-robe atop it, and she carried the gloves, her notebook, and _An Introduction to Herbs_ into the kitchen with her.

“Good morning, Ahiru.” Edel glanced over from where she was slicing bread. “Oh, good, you’re already prepared.”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “I – I figured you might want to start right after breakfast, so I didn’t want to have to go back to my room and get ready after we ate.”

“You thought right.” Edel gave her an approving look. “You’re a smart girl, Ahiru, and I look forward to teaching you.”

Ahiru felt a blush forming on her cheeks, and she ducked her head, pretending to be interested in the many looping scratches on the table’s surface. “I – I hope I do a good job… I don’t want to be disappointing…”

“You’ll be fine,” Edel assured her. “Don’t fret too much. Whatever pace you’re comfortable with, we’ll go at, and as it’s something new to you I certainly don’t expect you to be an expert right away. You are my student, after all, and I would be a poor teacher if I didn’t treat you with respect, understanding, and patience.”

Something else Pike had worried needlessly about, then, Ahiru realized with some relief. Edel had already done much to set her mind at ease, but this was the final touch needed. “I… th-thank you…” she managed, feeling a lump form in her throat.

“You’re very welcome.” Edel returned to preparing their breakfast, and a few minutes later brought everything over to the table. She’d put together a simple meal of thinly sliced meat, bread, some soft and creamy goat cheese, a few of the last tomatoes of the season, and hot cups of strong tea. Ahiru lightened the flavor of her tea with some honey and fresh goat’s milk, and spread a jam made from summer berries on her bread. They ate at an unhurried pace, and then proceeded to the room she’d seen briefly the day before.

When Edel had brought her through here yesterday with the announcement before they entered that this would be the room she’d be learning and doing most of her work in, she’d expected something more like a classroom, with desks for them both. It had been set up to accommodate education, true, but didn’t feel much like a classroom. She’d be sitting in an old wooden chair with a cushion attached to it for the occupant’s comfort, at a wide worktable set up with various tools and implements. Other such tables were arranged in various places around the room, and against the walls stood tall closets and shelves and bookcases. At the very back of the room a fire crackled invitingly in the large hearth, and Ahiru found her eyes drawn to the cauldron seated on the floor near it.

“Before we begin, have you read any of the book I had you buy?” Edel inquired as Ahiru sat down. “It’s quite all right if you haven’t, I am simply curious.”

“I – I’ve read a little,” Ahiru admitted. “I read some at night while I was still back in the city, and then a bit at the inn on the way here. It was kind of hard to read on the coach cause of the other passengers, and I wanted to look at where we were going, too… sorry…”

“It’s fine.” Edel smiled gently. “I do not blame you. I merely wished to know if you had had the chance to peruse it yet. We will still start at the beginning of the book, and review each herb thoroughly so that you can feel comfortable and confident in your knowledge. We will work at that until lunch, and then resume after we have eaten – at that time I will have you assist me in brewing a simple ointment.”

“O-okay!” Ahiru relaxed; she didn’t know if Edel could tell, but she didn’t feel confident enough in her retention of what she _had_ read to be quizzed on it just yet. She didn’t think Edel would harshly criticize her for “failing” such a test or try to make her feel unintelligent, but all the same she had no desire to possibly embarrass herself, not on her first day.

“Open your book if you’re ready, then,” Edel said, seating herself opposite Ahiru.

Ahiru obeyed, trying to ignore the niggling fear that decided to manifest itself now: what if the pace she needed was too slow? What if even with Edel there to go in-depth with her she didn’t understand the material? She felt like she hadn’t made any real progress on it when she’d had those chances to read at night, and she worried that it was because she wasn’t up to the material, and was destined to be terrible at everything forever.

As it turned out, however, her difficulties had had everything to do with the distractions and other worries gnawing at her mind during those times, and nothing to do with her natural intelligence. Free of those concerns and fresh from a good night’s sleep and a nourishing breakfast, Ahiru found her ability to concentrate much less impeded, and so the material sank into her willing brain much more easily. It also helped that Edel was a good teacher, patient and encouraging, and answering every question she had in clear, concise terms. She had samples, too, of many of the herbs and flowers covered in the book, allowing for a more hands-on learning experience that really brought the subject to life. Ahiru soon realized that not only was she learning much more easily than she’d expected, but she was also having fun. The subject was endlessly fascinating, and she found herself surprisingly excited about making her first brew later.

So enjoyable was it that Ahiru was almost disappointed to break for lunch; in the end she decided after several seconds of internal back and forth to bring her book with her, and review her notes and maybe read ahead a little while they ate. Edel didn’t comment directly on it, but Ahiru thought she seemed both amused and pleased by her dedication to learning. After a hearty lunch that would’ve left Ahiru feeling sleepy had she not counteracted its soporific effect with more well-sweetened tea, they headed back to finish their day’s work. Edel gave Ahiru a handwritten recipe for ointment to look over, and when she felt ready they got started.

“The first step is heating the cauldron properly.” Edel lifted it with what looked like surprising ease and fitted it into place above the fire she’d built back up again; Ahiru wondered if it was perhaps made with a lighter metal than it seemed. “While it does that, we will assemble the components for this ointment.” She gestured at the ointment recipe. “Bring me the things on the list, please.”

“O-okay.” Ahiru studied the list again, and then walked over to the shelf where Edel kept jars of ingredients. She found to her relief that they were organized in alphabetical order, rather than being grouped by use or function. There were, she supposed, merits to the latter method, but none of them would be much help to a beginner, or even just to someone in a hurry who needed specific things. She found each one quickly, and brought them back over to the small table Edel had placed near the hearth.

“Good.” Edel nodded approvingly. “Now, we begin.” She gestured to the equipment arranged neatly on the table. “Ahiru, please measure out the oils and beeswax and place them in the cauldron. As you no doubt have read on the instructions, they must be melted together.”

“Y-yes, of course.” Ahiru dutifully measured out the beeswax and set it aside, and then gathered up three glass measuring containers for the essential oils. She poured them carefully and slowly, not wanting to splash or to tip too much into the containers, knowing that precision was important. She started with the wintergreen, and then the thyme, and finished with the lavender, which smelled so good she wanted to curl up in bed with a pillow scented by it. Once she was sure she’d gotten everything measured perfectly she put them in the cauldron, taking care that she didn’t accidentally touch the sides and burn herself. Her robes and gloves were made to protect her from such things, but all the same she didn’t want to take chances.

 “Excellent work.” Edel surveyed the mixture and then turned back to look at Ahiru. “Now we simmer it for ninety minutes, and while we wait we’ll clean up and then do some more reading. Put the ingredients back in their places, and then we’ll wash the measuring tools.”

“All right.” Ahiru carefully balanced the jars in her arms, and walked back over to the shelves. She felt another twinge of gratitude that everything was organized so simply, for it made it easy to return everything to where it belonged. After she’d done that – checking it over again to be sure before walking away – she joined Edel at the little sink in the corner, where they soaped up the containers she’d measured the oil in and then rinsed them in boiling water and patted them dry with clean towels.

The rest of the ninety minutes passed quickly; Ahiru became so re-absorbed in learning the various herbs and flowers that before she knew it, it was time to remove the cauldron from the fire to let it cool. Once it had done that they would spoon it into little jars, label them, and store them with the rest of Edel’s stockpile of various medicinal brews.

“Within the next week or so we’ll be delivering these, along with some other items, to a customer,” Edel told her as she wrote out the labels. “That is something I will require you to do – visit people with me when I deliver their medicines. Not always, for sometimes I will need you to stay behind and study, or tend to an ongoing brew, but often. It is important that you meet the people we help, and become acquainted with them so that you can better understand the community you will be serving.”

“Y-yeah, that makes sense.” Ahiru peered into the cauldron, where the ointment was still softly steaming. “I don’t mind. It’ll be fun to meet people. Un-unless it’s not supposed to be,” she added with a nervous frown.

“Don’t worry.” Edel gave her a brief smile before returning her attention to the labels. “You _should_ be ready and willing to meet the people you are going to be helping. You _should_ want to get to know them, and see them not just as customers or patients, but as people first and foremost. This line of work makes enough money to live comfortably on, if not in excess, but it is taken up primarily out of an interest in doing good works.”

“That’s why I wanted it.” Ahiru put her chin in her hands. “I mean, okay… it wasn’t the first thing I tried to apply to, but everything else I tried to get, it was something I was interested in cause I want to be able to help people and do stuff for them. I needed something where I could support myself but I also wanna support other people if I can, you know?” She glanced up at Edel. “Does – does that make any sense?”

“Perfect sense. And I am glad to hear it.” Edel set her pen down. “I could tell from your letter that you are a girl of good character, and that is why I accepted you, though it makes me no less happy to hear it from you in such words. I do not blame anyone for taking up an occupation out of the need to support oneself, certainly not, not in this harsh world we live in. But neither do I look kindly upon those who would take up one such as this while possessing little regard for those whom they will be providing assistance to. Assistance that is meant to better their lives, and sometimes even save it.” She reached out and touched Ahiru’s cheek. “You are a kind girl, Ahiru, and I have high hopes for you.”

Ahiru gulped. “I – I hope I don’t disappoint them… I mean, it’s only been a day, and I haven’t done that much…”

Edel started to say something, but the door bell rang just then, startling both. “Hmmm… I hope it isn’t an emergency…” she muttered as she hurried out of the room. Alarm fluttering to life inside her, Ahiru followed her.

“Hello!” A tall, plump woman with a bright smile and violet hair piled into a messy bun atop her head greeted them warmly as Edel opened the door. “I brought you a treat!” She brandished a large basket with a white cloth on top, from which a delicious smell wafted. Ahiru felt her stomach rumble pitifully at the scent, despite that she hadn’t eaten lunch _that_ long ago.

“Hello, Ebine.” Edel smiled. “Would you like to come in?”

“Certainly! Thank you!” She bustled in as Edel moved aside. “To tell you the truth, I…” Her voice trailed off and her smile faltered slightly as she saw Ahiru. “Who – who’s this? Have… have you adopted a ward?”

“No, this is my apprentice, Ahiru Klein.” Edel closed the door. “Ahiru, this is Ebine Kuchler. She runs the best bakery in Goldkrone.”

“Oh, now, there’s no need for flattery…” Ebine fidgeted slightly and toyed with some loose strands of hair. “Your… apprentice, you said? So… that means…”

“If you’re not comfortable talking about certain matters in front of her, you don’t have to,” Edel said gently. “But she – well.” Edel turned to Ahiru. “Ahiru, Ebine is not only my friend, but also my patient and customer, and we will be brewing and delivering things for her. However, it is against a witch’s code of honor to speak of clients’ personal matters with others, and is a serious breach of the trust that exists between us and them. Do you understand?”

“Y-yes.” Ahiru nodded. “But um… like you said, if she doesn’t want me to hear stuff then I don’t want to sit in on you two talking or anything, cause that’s not right… so I’ll just go away and check on the ointment or something, okay?”

“Oh no, do stay,” Ebine spoke up, looking more relaxed. “Forgive my rudeness, Miss Ahiru, I was just startled… Edel’s never had an apprentice before and I didn’t want some stranger hearing what I have to ask her, but if you’re going to be working with her and making things for me, then we better get to know each other sooner or later, don’t you think?”

“I – I guess, but…” Ahiru bit her lip. “I – I don’t wanna intrude… don’t feel like you have to include me just cause I’m here, it’s really all right…”

“But I want to. And besides…” Ebine’s eyes twinkled with an almost wicked glee. “I did hear your stomach growl at what I have in the basket, didn’t I? It’d hardly be good business for my bakery if I didn’t let you eat your fill of free samples! Come, let’s have a little feast! You do have tea on, don’t you, Edel?”

“Not at the moment, but I’ll remedy that.” Edel glanced back and forth between them. “Shall I brew enough for two or three? Ahiru?”

“U-um, three, I g-guess,” Ahiru said.

“All right.” Edel nodded. “You two can wait in the sitting room or come to the kitchen; it’s your choice.”

“Now, whyever would we wait in the sitting room?” Ebine looped her free arm through Ahiru’s and bustled after Edel. “Less conversation there! And we don’t want get crumbs on the nice rug, after all.”

Edel laughed. “Suit yourself, then.”

Ahiru settled herself down at the kitchen table while Edel put the kettle on, trying to let her hands simply rest in her lap instead of twisting at her skirts. Beside her, Ebine set the basket down with a flourish and whipped the cloth off dramatically.

“Behold!” she said with a broad, warm laugh that made some of Ahiru’s nervous tension melt away. “Some bread for your dinner tonight – and maybe even breakfast tomorrow, and a few treats as well, for right now or for after dinner… doesn’t matter to me.” She shrugged.

“They… they smell really good,” Ahiru said, trying to peer into the basket. She could just barely see something with a yellowish hue to it, if she strained her neck.

“Why, thank you!” Ebine smiled. “Oh, but are you having trouble seeing what they are? I’m sorry.” She began to take items out of the basket and arrange them on the table. “Lemon poppyseed muffins, milk and honey cake, and cheese horns. Would you like one?”

Ahiru’s mouth watered as she stared at the trio of treats before her. “U-um, y-yeah… could I, could I have a cheese horn please?” She stared longingly at them – flaky pastry had been rolled into a shape resembling the horn of some animal or other, and stuffed with a rich cream cheese filling.

“Certainly!” Ebine turned to Edel. “Plates, if you would?”

“Of course.” Edel brought over a few plates, and Ebine set Ahiru’s choice on one of them and put it in front of her. “Now, to get down to things… I presume you have a reason for this visit besides plying us with baked goods?”

Ebine sagged slightly, and sank down into the chair beside Ahiru. “Yes… well… you know how it is.” She stared down at the empty plate in front of her. “I have my good days and bad… it’s just that lately…”

“The bad ones have been worse?” Edel guessed as she poured hot water into the teapot for brewing.

“I don’t know if I’d say they’re worse, but there have been more of them.” She traced a pattern around the rim of her plate. “Yes, perhaps they’re worse, for I seem to be running short on the potion… I’ve had need of more of it lately. Yes, I know,” she added with a wince. “I’m meant to consult you before changing the dose amounts on my own, and I _am_ sorry, it’s just… the shop keeps me so busy I haven’t had the time.” She sighed. “It’s a double-edged sword… the success and the customers keep my spirits up and distract me when I need it, but it does make it difficult to get things done that I need to. Doubly so when it’s _not_ distracting me and I need other ways of coping…”

“No need to apologize.” Edel reached over and squeezed Ebine’s shoulder. “It happens. But…” She brought the teacups over and set them down, and then fetched the teapot as well. “ _Do_ you think you need me to change the dosage? Or do you just need a fresh supply?”

“Both,” Ebine admitted.

“Hmmm.” Edel considered. “Well, after I’ve poured the tea I’ll go fetch some of the latest batch, and when I get back you can tell me how often you’ve been using it lately and what seems to work, and we’ll sort out the new dosage from there.”

She poured the tea after a couple more minutes, and then disappeared as she said; she reappeared soon enough, carrying two bottles of golden liquid that shimmered slightly when they caught the sunlight. By this time Ahiru was on her second cheese horn, and she pretended to be very interested in it while Ebine and Edel discussed matters of medicine. She knew Ebine had welcomed her presence and that she would have to learn about all of this in time, but it nevertheless felt awkward to be here when this was her first time meeting the woman.

“That’s that, then.” Edel squeezed Ebine’s hand. “I do hope it works well for you.”

“Thank you, so do I.” Ebine offered her a tremulous smile before polishing off the last of her tea. “I hope I didn’t intrude or disturb you overmuch by popping in so suddenly…”

“Nonsense.” Edel shook her head. “I’ve told you, this is my job, you should always feel free to come to me when you need help. That’s what I’m here for. And besides, if it will help set your mind at ease, we had little to do but wait for an ointment to cool before storing it.”

Ebine smiled. “That does help, yes. I’d hate to think I was bothering you…”

“Not at all.” Edel returned her smile. “Would you like to stay for dinner as well?”

“Oh no, I’m afraid not.” Ebine shook her head. “Thank you for the kind offer, but as much as I’d like to accept I can’t – I have a few things around the house that need to get done before I eat and turn in. Which is sounding awfully tempting right now, it’s been a long day.” She yawned, as if to emphasize her statement. “You see what I mean? You aren’t boring me, I assure you, it’s only…”

“We understand, no worries,” Edel cut in, and Ahiru nodded in agreement. “If you’d like to get going, don’t let us keep you.”

“That does sound nice.” Ebine said. “Not because I tire of your company but because, well… the sooner the chores are done, the sooner I can get into bed, you know?”

“Of course.” Edel stood up as she saw Ebine doing the same. “Thank you for the baked goods; truly, it is appreciated.”

“You’re more than welcome! Oh, but…” Ebine flushed, her round face going bright pink. “That is… I do have actual payment for you for the medicine, I didn’t come unprepared, terribly sorry for not bringing it out before…” She fumbled in her bag and produced a rather thick envelope. “Here… you can count it if you wish, I won’t be insulted…”

“No need, I trust you.” Edel smiled as she took the envelope and laid it on the table.

“Yes… well…” Ebine turned her attention on Ahiru. “It was really nice to meet you, Ahiru, dear – I hope you’ll stop by the bakery sometime for a treat!”

“Y-yes! I will!” Ahiru nodded as she too rose to her feet. “It – it was really nice to meet you too, a-and the pastries were really delicious! Thank you!”

Ebine smiled then, a genuine one that reached her round, friendly eyes. “You’re more than welcome.”

Edel walked Ebine to the front door, while Ahiru trailed behind; goodnight was bid once more, and then Ebine headed back down the path, basket on her arm. Edel watched her for a moment before closing the door. “Ahiru?”

Ahiru gulped at the serious tone of her voice. “Y-yes?”

“I did notice that you did not seem to be trying to pay attention when I discussed Ebine’s new dosage with her.”

“Oh.” Ahiru looked down at the floor. “I – I’m sorry… I just… I felt really awkward about being there, cause this was my first time meeting her, and she seemed kinda unsure about having me there when she first saw me, and… I just…”

“It will be like that with the others too,” Edel said gently. “You will meet them for the first time and learn of the things that we treat them for. Some are physical ailments, others are mental. Ebine was merely startled to see you, and she relaxed when she learned your identity. That is because she knows that it is the way of things to get the apprentice acquainted with the clients – it was done for me when I was apprenticed to my predecessor, and all here are familiar with the custom. I understand your discomfort, but it is something you must learn to get past.”

“O-oh. I – I see…” Ahiru swallowed. “I – I’m sorry…”

“It’s fine.” Edel shook her head. “As you said yourself earlier, it is only your first day. Now…” She paused. “As for Ebine, the nature of her ailment is, as you might have guessed, a mental one.”

Ahiru nodded. “Y-yeah, I – I thought it sounded like that.”

“Mmmm.” Edel’s eyes were unreadable. “She has always suffered from disordered moods, but it became exacerbated by the death of her husband two years ago, and she relies on me to produce medicines that help her manage it. She prefers to restrict the knowledge to those whom she trusts, however, as there are those who would be unkind to her if they knew.”

Ahiru frowned. “Th-that’s awful… just cause she has to take stuff to help herself like that doesn’t mean she’s a bad person… there’s nothing wrong with that…”

“I know that.” Edel’s eyes softened. “And I am glad you do as well. Ebine will be too. But not all are as understanding as you are, Ahiru.” She cleared her throat. “In any case, we had best check on that ointment, and when it’s been properly stored we can see about dinner.”

Ahiru squirmed. “I – I might not have much appetite for dinner…”

“That’s all right.” Edel laughed. “You have no need to justify yourself to me, especially as I _do_ know how tempting Ebine’s baked goods can be.” She turned and headed towards their workroom, and Ahiru followed. “I meant it when I said she runs the best bakery in Goldkrone.”

“I believe it,” Ahiru said dreamily, remembering how deliciously buttery and flaky the pastry had been, how delicately, slightly sweet the cream cheese had tasted. She couldn’t wait to try that loaf of bread, too. “She’s _really_ talented… and nice, too.”

“Indeed.” Edel smiled. “That is another reason for forging friendships with our clients, Ahiru: to see them as people beyond their ailments. People are more than just the things that afflict them.”

“Y-yeah,” Ahiru said, nodding in agreement. “Everybody has their own story to tell, their own talents and hopes and dreams and thoughts… that’s why I love talking to people an-and meeting them. It’s what makes me want to do all I can to help people… cause they’re _people_.”

Edel’s smile widened. “Then you truly will do well as a witch.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kuchler: Occupational surname for a baker who made small cakes or cookies. It is derived from Middle High German _kuoche_ "cake, pastry".


	4. Chapter 4

Tiny puffs of steam drifted up from the cauldron as its contents softly simmered; nearby, Ahiru chopped herbs under Edel’s supervision. The bulk of the brewing for this potion was already done, with the addition of the fresh herbs being the final step, as they were the most fragile ingredient and had to be handled with care. Indeed, Ahiru needed to use a special knife and a gentle touch to make sure they didn’t bruise in the chopping, as this would alter the effect they had on the mixture. Fortunately, her small hands were well-suited to delicate operations such as this, and Edel nodded approvingly as Ahiru finished.

“Good work. Now, add them gradually with one hand while slowly stirring with the other,” she instructed her. “Once they’re all mixed in, that will be the end of it.

“A-all right.” Ahiru carefully gathered her handiwork onto the square of parchment that had been provided, and carried it over to the cauldron. As she’d been directed, she slowly poured the herbs into the simmering brew while stirring at the same unhurried pace. She continued until all the tiny green flecks had been well-blended, and then stopped stirring.

“Excellent.” Edel moved to her side and carefully removed the specially treated wooden spoon they used for stirring brews, shaking it to get as much off as she could before carrying it to the sink.  “Now we’ll store it, and then after we clean up I’ll make us some lunch.”

They ladled the hot potion into jars that had already been sterilized and labeled, and then set about cleaning the cauldron, wooden spoon, and other tools that they’d used. Once that was done Edel hung her work robe on the peg that had been attached to the back of the door and retreated to the kitchen to begin preparing lunch for them. Ahiru drifted after her, carrying a battered old potions book from Edel’s library with her that she set down on the table. She flipped through it to where she’d left off earlier – her place marked with a thin old ribbon – and began reading. The noises produced by the meal preparation didn’t bother her; quite the opposite, in fact, there was something relaxing about them. She’d never have been allowed to sit in the kitchen and read while food was being made in either of her previous homes, or to be in the kitchens at all, so it was a nice change that she’d easily adjusted to. Life in Edel’s house was much more relaxed and less formal, and suited her just fine.

The thing that _did_ disturb her, however, was the clang of the door bell. Ahiru looked up in confusion. “Are – are we expecting someone?”

“No, but I do have unexpected visitors fairly often.” Edel frowned slightly as she stirred whatever she was making. “Answer it, would you? I can’t get away just now.”

“O-of course!” Ahiru scrambled up from her seat and hurried down the hall to the front door, nearly stumbling over her own feet twice before she got there. She took a moment to catch her breath, and then yanked the door open, just as the person on the other side had started to reach for the bell again. “U-um, hi! Can I help you?”

“… Who are you?” The man standing there frowned down at her. “Where’s Edel?”

“U-um, she – she’s in the kitchen, she couldn’t… she’s busy… I’m…” Ahiru frowned back, feeling like he was familiar somehow. “I’m her new apprentice, I’ve…” She trailed off as she suddenly realized where she’d seen him before. “O-oh! You! You’re… you’re the knight that helped me, when I was on my way here! R-remember? In the forest, with the bandits? The ones that attacked the coach?”

“… Oh. Yes.” His expression relaxed slightly. “I remember.”

“A-and I don’t think we got introduced properly, or – or at all, really, so…” Ahiru let go of the door and stuck her hand out. “I’m Ahiru Klein! It’s nice to meet you!”

 “Fakir Grunewald.” He hesitated for a moment, and then took her hand in his and shook it. “Can I come in now?”

“O-oh! Yes! Of – of course, I’m so sorry!” Cheeks burning with embarrassment, Ahiru stepped back to allow him to walk in. “Y-you’re here to see Edel, right? As a customer? You can tell me anything you need to, I’ll keep it a secret, she said that I’m supposed to know stuff and meet people and not talk about things so you can trust me with stuff and you don’t have to worry and just…” She trailed off. “Um, y-yeah…”

“No.” Fakir shook his head. “I’m her nephew, actually. I just stopped by to visit.”

“Her… oh.” Ahiru closed the door, a perplexed look flitting across her face for a moment. Edel didn’t look old enough to be an aunt to a fully grown man, but then, maybe she was much younger than whichever of his parents she was related to. “W-well then, um, you wanna come to the kitchen and sit down? She sent me to answer the door cause she’s fixing lunch and she said she couldn’t get away just then and so here I am instead, ahahahaha…”

“Yeah, that’s fine.” He started walking towards the kitchen without waiting for her, and Ahiru hurried to catch up. She opened her mouth to ask how he knew where to go, but then closed it again as she realized that he’d been here before, of _course_ he knew where to go. She swallowed, glad she hadn’t ended up making an even bigger fool of herself in front of him.

Back at the crossroads she’d been too shaken up to really take much notice of him, aside from remembering well enough how he looked to recognize him today. Now, in these much calmer circumstances, it was impossible not to notice how breathtakingly handsome he really was. Her cheeks warmed with a fresh blush as she realized it, and she found herself glad he couldn’t see her face right now. Fakir, he’d said his name was… it suited him somehow. She didn’t know what it meant, but she liked the sound of it, and it seemed to go perfectly with his dark good looks.

Edel looked up as the kitchen door swung open. “Ahiru, who – oh, Fakir!” She smiled. “What a pleasant surprise – what brings you here today?”

He shrugged. “Nothing in particular, just thought I’d stop by.”

“How nice. Will you stay for lunch?”

Fakir hesitated, then nodded. “Sure. Why not?”

“Excellent. Now…” Her gaze strayed to Ahiru, who was hovering at the door to the kitchen. “I don’t know if you two introduced yourselves yet, but Ahiru, this is my nephew Fakir. Fakir, this is –”

“She told me,” Fakir interrupted as he seated himself at the table. “Your new apprentice.”

“Ah, good.” Edel returned her attention to the food she was preparing. “She just arrived here a few days ago, while you were on that hunt with the prince and the other knights. I understand you all happened to return just as her coach was attacked by thieves?”

“Y-yeah, and – and Fakir saved me himself!” Ahiru broke in. “This – this really creepy guy was coming towards me, and Fakir rode up and killed him before he could do anything and he helped save my life and everyone else’s, and…” She braved a glance at Fakir, her face heating again. “Th-thank you so much… I don’t know what I can do to really thank you, or pay you back…”

“You don’t need to.” He shook his head. “I told you already – I was just doing my duty. As a knight I’m supposed to help and protect others. It’s not something you need to do anything special in return for.”

“W-well, I… I guess that’s kinda true, that it’s your job, but still…” Ahiru pursed her lips. “I _wanna_ do something, cause I really am grateful, I was so scared of what they were going to do to us, to me, and I don’t care what you say, it was really brave to do what you did cause they could’ve hurt you too, and I feel like just saying thank you isn’t enough…”

He sighed, sounding exasperated. “And there’s nothing I can do to change your mind?”

“I…” Ahiru faltered at the look on his face. “W-well, I mean… if you really don’t want me to do anything, I guess I won’t, but… but why do you have to act that way? Do you always act like that when someone is trying to do something nice for you? I know it’s your job to help and protect people, but shouldn’t you also be kind to them instead of being so rude and ungrateful?”

“It’s not my job to be liked.” His tone was icy. “I just have to fight to serve the people and my prince. That’s all. I don’t care about being popular. Don’t lecture me on my duties, I know very well how to do them properly.”

“But this isn’t about being popular!” Ahiru stamped her foot in frustration. “It’s about… it’s about just being kind to people when they’re kind to you, cause… cause it’s the right thing to do. Not cause it’ll make people like you, but because it’s good to be nice to others, you should treat everybody well for their own sake. What’s so bad about accepting somebody’s thanks if you help them? I don’t understand why you’re so resistant to that.” Her lower lip trembled. “You saved my _life_. I don’t know why you’re being so mean to me about me being grateful for that…”

“… Fine.” His eyes seemed to soften slightly, but she couldn’t tell because he glanced away in the next second. “Do what you want.”

“That’s better,” Edel spoke up, a note of reproach in her voice. “Honestly, Fakir, didn’t Charon raise you to behave better than that? Particularly to girls. You should be ashamed of yourself. I know I am.”

Fakir flinched at that. “Edel…”

“No, don’t ‘Edel’ me. Just because we’re related doesn’t mean I’m going to take your side when you’re in the wrong. Ahiru is right – you need to treat people more kindly. Isn’t it part of a knight’s job to be chivalrous to others? You’re not showing much of that right now.”

“I…” He sighed. “Sorry.”

“Is that directed towards me, or to her? Because you have nothing to apologize to _me_ for.”

Fakir mumbled something inaudible under his breath that sounded like it was in a different language entirely, and then dragged his gaze back over to Ahiru. “… I’m sorry.”

“Okay.” Ahiru nodded at him, still feeling wary. His apology sounded sincere, but her hurt at having her gratitude rejected like that couldn’t help but linger a little.

Edel seemed to sense her discomfort, and her eyes twinkled with amusement. “You don’t have to accept his apology if you don’t want to, Ahiru. He _was_ very impolite.”

“No, no, I…” Ahiru struggled for words, even as she tried not to laugh at how Fakir was scowling at Edel. “It – it’s all right, I mean, I’m still kinda mad, but I don’t wanna not accept someone’s apology, that’d be rude too, I mean, not quite as rude, but still… I’d kinda feel bad…”

“That’s stupid.” Fakir rolled his eyes. “You don’t have to accept anyone’s apology just because they said it. There’s no reason to feel bad about still being angry at someone for something bad they did or said.”

“I… but…” Ahiru frowned. “Are – are you telling me I shouldn’t accept _yours?_ That you _want_ me to be mad at you?”

“That’s not what I said at all. I just…” He let his breath out. “Do whatever you want. If you still want to be mad at me, I’m not going to hold it against you. Not accepting an apology isn’t on the same level as whatever was done that required an apology in the first place.”

“I don’t think that’s always necessarily true, but… I guess you have a point.” Ahiru glanced down at the floor. “Kinda. I mean… um… well… a-anyway, I do accept your apology, a-as long as you agree to me giving you something in exchange for saving my life.”

“What kind of thing?” It was his turn to sound wary. “I don’t want any expensive gifts, and there’s not much space in my room at the castle for anything large.”

“O-oh, um, no, nothing like that!” Ahiru shook her head. “I mean, not that you don’t deserve it for what you did, but… well… I was thinking probably something homemade, I guess… I haven’t really figured it out yet but I will, and I’ll keep it in mind to not make it something huge… is that okay?”

“Do what you want.” Fakir shrugged.

“F-fine, I will,” Ahiru said, bristling again slightly at his tone. She didn’t understand him at all – how could he be so obstinate about someone showing their gratitude for a thing he’d did that really was so important, and then at the same time be so understanding of her lingering anger over his behavior? He was definitely weird, and she wasn’t sure what to think of him.

“If you two are done sorting out the details, perhaps I could serve lunch now?” Edel asked, still sounding vaguely amused.

“Oh! Oh yes! S-sorry!” Ahiru darted forward to where she’d left her book open and seated herself. She put the ribbon back in its place and pushed the book out of the way just as Edel brought over a plate of noodles in a creamy sauce and some hot sliced sausages beside a pile of sauerkraut. Steaming cups of tea followed, and she and Fakir waited for Edel to be seated too before digging in.

“How are things up at the castle?” Edel asked between bites.

“Busy.” Fakir shrugged. “It’s never really quiet to begin with, but with the wedding preparations going on things are even more hectic than usual.”

“I can imagine.” Edel took a sip of tea. “I’ll be having to pay a visit up there myself just before the festivities, to make sure all the proper spells and charms are in place.”

“How come?” Ahiru asked. “Is – is there going to be danger there?”

“Not at all, not like you’re probably thinking.” Edel shook her head. “Most of the spells and charms laid down will be for good fortune for the royal couple, fertility, things like that. Others will be protective, but from nothing more unusual than mischievous beings who might decide to drop in uninvited.”

Ahiru’s eyes widened. “They can do that?”

“Only if the proper precautions aren’t taken,” Edel said reassuringly. “And really, I doubt they’d come into the heart of the city anyway, even surrounded by the forest as we are.”

“It doesn’t hurt to be careful.” There was an edge to Fakir’s voice. “And you shouldn’t encourage her to be careless. This is a different place than the big city she likely came from, and you’re supposed to be teaching her to protect herself from our… neighbors.”

“She’s not!” Ahiru burst in. “Don’t – don’t be mean to her! She’s just –”

“Ahiru, it’s fine,” Edel interrupted. “Fakir means well, he simply… doesn’t know the first thing about expressing it properly.” She cast him an amused glance.

“Hmph.” Fakir looked away, his cheeks reddening.

“O-oh.” Ahiru looked over at him, and then back to Edel. “I – I didn’t know…”

“Well, how would you? You’ve never had the chance to really speak to him before now and learn about the odd way he shows his concern for others.” She laughed as Fakir scowled. “Anyway, Fakir, if it will make you feel any better, rest assured I’d never encourage her to be careless about the Fair Folk.” She speared a piece of sausage and chewed it while regarding him. “Honestly, what’s gotten into you today?” she asked once she’d swallowed it. “You’re never usually _this_ prickly.”

“Well, excuse me for being cautious,” Fakir snapped, his cheeks still bright pink. “The fairies aren’t to be trifled with or taken lightly, you should know that. I certainly do.”

Ahiru’s eyes widened again. “Have – have you _met_ any?”

“I…” Fakir paused. “I’ve had… dealings with them. It comes with the territory, as one who helps to maintain the safety of the forest. Not only that, but the royal hunts are conducted within the woods, and more than once we have had to be careful not to stray over the borders. Of course, sometimes in the heat of the chase it does happen, and that is when we have encountered our good neighbors.” He swirled his fork around in his noodles without catching any on the tines. “It isn’t something I would recommend. If you must go into the forest alone, wait until Edel has shown you where the borders lie. The knights won’t always be around to rescue you in the nick of time should you get yourself into trouble.”

Ahiru made a face at him before turning to Edel. “Borders?”

“Yes.” Edel set her fork down and reached for her tea again. “Generations ago, an agreement was reached between the Fairy King and the ruling prince of the time, that some of the forest could be set aside for the free use of the people of Schwangau. We are not allowed to do irreparable harm to it, but we are allowed to venture into it without fear of retribution, and may harvest from it, though not to excess.” She sipped her tea. “I am grateful for it, personally, as several things vital to my – our – craft are found within the allotted space of the woods.”

“Well, that’s…” Ahiru trailed off as something occurred to her; something Pike had said during that afternoon tea the day before she left. “Wait, but… the forest was handed over just like that? Without the Fairy King wanting something in return? I thought that bargains with the Fair Folk always came with a price…”

“Heh.” Fakir laughed mirthlessly. “So they _do_ teach city folk something about the fairies, after all.”

“A – a little.” Ahiru flushed. “Mostly I just heard some stories in my education when I was younger, I don’t really remember all of them… but my friends and I talked about them a bit before I came here, they were worried about me cause the country’s supposed to be more dangerous and kinda strange like that, more than the city…”

“They weren’t wrong.” Fakir ate the last piece of his sausage, and then resumed speaking. “The Fair Folk long ago fled the larger cities, but in places like this they still linger on the borders. And the Fairy King is reluctant to let those borders change. He is not fond of losing anything he sees as belonging to him.”

“Then why let people here have some of the forest for free?” Ahiru’s nose crinkled with confusion. “That doesn’t make any sense.”

“Because it wasn’t for free.” Something flickered briefly in Fakir’s eyes, and Ahiru found herself momentarily distracted by just how green they were. “The people here were harming the forest, taking more than could be sustained from it, as well as reaping tragedies due to retaliation for encroaching on the fairies’ territory, and the treaty was an attempt at making peace for the sake of both lands. To ensure its safety, a human child from a noble family was handed over to the Fairy King – he promised that as long as the forest remained unharmed, so too would the child.”

“So they say,” Edel remarked. “No proof has ever been found in the royal records of such an exchange, however. Personally, I’ve always thought it sounded like a changeling legend tacked onto it later to act as an injunctive against anyone who would be tempted to break the pact for personal gain.”

“It could be.” Fakir shrugged. “But old legends often have a grain of truth in them.”

“You don’t have to tell _me_ that.” Edel looked amused again. “You know, as fond as you are of reading and books, I’m surprised you ended up going into the knighthood. I always thought that going into some field related to books would have suited your strengths better.”

Fakir’s eyes narrowed. “You’ve said things like that before. Are you saying you think I’m not strong enough to be a knight?”

“What? Not at all.” Edel shook her head, looking suddenly perplexed. “Fakir, really, is something bothering you today?”

“… I’m fine.” He looked away. “Anyway, I’ve told you before – my true calling is the knighthood. I’m meant to stand at my prince’s side and protect him and his realm from all who would harm it. That’s what I’ve always been destined for.”

“I’m not sure I agree with that,” Edel said thoughtfully. “Destiny is a changeable thing, to my way of thinking, not at all set in stone. It is for us all to decide which paths we take in life.”

“To some extent, yes.” Fakir pushed the rest of his sauerkraut around with his fork. “Some things can’t be defied or changed, though.”

“Perhaps.” Edel drained the last of her tea, and poured some more from the pot. “In any case, what of you, Fakir? How have you been? I know things at the castle are busy… what about you, are you keeping well?”

“As well I can be, I suppose.” He took a moment to collect the last of the noodles together with the sauerkraut on his fork and eat them. “The day to day routine is more than enough occupation for me; I don’t stay idle. We patrol, we hunt, we ride, we train… I’m satisfied knowing I’m doing my best to serve my prince.”

“And princess too, soon,” Edel reminded him.

Another flicker in his eyes. “… Yes. Though it might as well be now, for she is already living there, and treated as though she’s already been crowned.”

“Oh?” Edel raised an eyebrow. “And you have a problem with that?”

“No, I – I just –” Fakir turned red. “I just meant that… that there won’t be an adjustment period after the wedding takes place, that we’re all getting used to her being there, and treating her with… with the proper respect.”

“Mmmm.” Edel sipped her tea. “Of course, I’ve only met her the one time, when my services were contracted for the wedding… she seemed perfectly friendly to me, though I do not, obviously, see what goes on in the castle. If she is unkind I understand if you dislike her, though I do also want to extend understanding to her – she is having to go through an adjustment of her own, moving to an unknown land so far from home, where she knows no one.”

“Y-yeah, that… that sounds like it’d be really hard on her,” Ahiru spoke up. She didn’t know the princess they were speaking of, and it was possible she wasn’t a kind person, but all the same she felt a pang of sympathy for someone in a similar situation to her own. It was true that the princess would be living a much more privileged life as a member of royalty, but she’d have her own set of difficulties and responsibilities to learn to adjust to. She didn’t really envy her.

“… I’m sure it is.” Fakir looked out the window. “Anyway, I should be going now… I still have some other things to do before returning to the castle.”

“That’s a shame. But I understand.” Edel rose. “Do you at least want to take some dessert with you? I baked some apple bread yesterday.”

“Yeah, that sounds good.” Fakir wiped at his mouth with a napkin before standing up. “Thanks.”

Edel sliced some apple bread for Fakir, and then she and Ahiru walked him to the front door. They both bid him goodbye, Ahiru promising again that she would think of something soon to make and bring him as thanks for saving her life at the crossroads. He still seemed slightly discomfited by the idea, but told her where to deliver it to when she’d done it, assuming he didn’t stop by again before then.

Once he’d departed down the path and the door was closed, Edel turned to her with a considering look on her face. “Ahiru? Would you like to accompany me a short ways into the woods? I have need of some mushrooms that grow in a particular area, and I think now is as good a time as any to introduce you to part of the borders that Fakir and I were speaking of earlier.”

“N-now? O-okay, but…” Ahiru twisted her hands nervously in front of her. “Could… could I take some of the apple bread with me?”

Edel laughed. “Of course. Why don’t you go get your cloak while I slice you some? We’ll be leaving from the kitchen anyway.”

“Okay!” Ahiru brightened at the promise of having more of Edel’s delicious bread, and hurried off to her room. Her cloak hung on a peg on the back of her door, right where she’d left it the day she’d arrived. She hadn’t gotten to go out of the house since, occupied with studying and learning and brewing, so there hadn’t been a chance to move it to a more suitable location, like the wardrobe near the front door.

When she got back to the kitchen Edel had neatly wrapped slices of apple bread in cloth napkins, and handed Ahiru one along with a small sack. “Here. The bread, and the bag for mushroom gathering.” She had her cloak on as well, and from it she withdrew a set of keys. “If you’re ready, we’ll go now.”

“I – I’m ready.” Ahiru nodded.

“Good.” She led her out the back door, and once she’d locked it they headed off through the rows of herbs and flowers, to where the trees parted like a doorway into the forest. Ahiru glanced back just once, at her own window, before following Edel into the woods.

Inside it was quieter than any place Ahiru had ever been, even with the calls of birds and chirping of insects. It was also deceptive – she’d expected the trees to be much closer together than they actually were, based on how they were crowded together at the entrance, but once past that opening “wall” they were much further apart, giving the area the feel of a relatively sparse outskirts, of sorts, before the _real_ forest began. The leaves had already begun to fall, further improving the visibility, but she still feared getting lost, so she stuck close to Edel.

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but I too was impressed by what you knew of the Fair Folk,” Edel said as they moved through the trees. Everything looked the same to Ahiru, but Edel seemed to know where she was going, which heartened her. “Not because of a low regard for you, you understand, but because the impression I had of city dwellers was that they have indeed begun to neglect the old ways and rituals because they believe themselves safe, and no longer tell the tales as frequently as they should.”

“N-no, you’re right, they kinda do.” Ahiru frowned as she thought of Pike and Lilie. “My friends knew more than me, but that’s cause they’re both really rich and their parents own country houses, so they’d leave the city sometimes and hear about it, or deal with it. They – they tried to scare me with stories about changelings and stuff before I left.”

“Hmmm.” Edel pursed her lips. “I would say that they were right to warn you, but I don’t doubt that they may have exaggerated a tad. We are not as safe as those in the larger cities, I grant you that, and there is no reason to be careless… but at the same time we _do_ have means of protecting ourselves with the most up to date magic and rituals, and I don’t personally care for the fear-mongering that goes on amongst city people, as well as the attitudes many hold about places like Goldkrone.” She paused. “Forgive me, I do not mean to insult your friends.”

“N-no, it’s okay, you’re right,” Ahiru said, shaking her heads. “My friends are… well… I know they mean well and they care about me, but they can be kinda snobby sometimes, it’s true.” She stared down at the carpet of fallen autumn leaves. “I – I know I haven’t been here long, but I really like it already. It’s a lot better than they seemed to think it would be.”

“I’m glad you think so.” Edel smiled. “Ah, but here we are – these are what I need.” She knelt beneath a towering fir tree, and brushed aside some leaves to reveal a cluster of light brown mushrooms with curly-edged caps. “Wild forest mushrooms are key ingredients in many potions, and we’ll go over their use tomorrow, now that I’m replenishing our stock.” She carefully plucked one from the ground, and brushed some dirt off. “Bring that bag here, Ahiru.”

“A-all right.” Ahiru started to hold out the napkin containing the bread she’d almost forgotten she had, but realized her mistake in time. She put the bread inside her cloak pocket and moved to stand beside Edel, holding the little sack open. She waited until Edel had gathered what she needed, and then pulled the drawstrings to close it. “Is – is that all we need from here?”

“Yes, for now.” Edel stood. “There are other areas where things grow that I harvest, but I am not in need of them right now. Come, I’ll show you the border, and then we’ll head back.”

She took Ahiru a little further into the woods, just to where the trees began to thicken again, though not impassably so. In a jagged, unevenly spaced line stood tall trees that had strange, misshapen green berries growing from their trunks and branches, marking the boundary between the human and the fairy world, but Ahiru didn’t really need them to show her where the line lay. She could _feel_ it, could feel the change in the energy. Here, in the portion of the woods allowed to her kind, the air felt calm and tranquil. At the line of trees, however, it altered itself into something _other_ , something vaguely wrong and dangerous that sent chills down her spine. She didn’t have to be told not to trespass beyond that point: the atmosphere there was as clear a message to that effect as it could be.

She ate her apple bread in silence on the way back, all too happy to leave that unearthly place. The bread tasted of home and familiar human things, and she wished for more when she’d finished it, as a way to comfort herself after the way the forest border had unnerved her. When they returned Edel took the mushroom sack to the basement, and then they set about cleaning the dishes that had been dirtied at lunch. Quiet study of books from the library then occupied the rest of the afternoon until it was time to stop and have dinner.

Ahiru chose to have a hot bath after she’d eaten, and was glad of it as soon as she sank into the water. It felt all too cleansing after her traipse into the forest; despite that she hadn’t actually gotten dirty, that brush with the edge of safety had left her feeling unsettled, like some sort of film had draped itself over her at the border. She lathered up her hands with soap and washed her whole body, and then slipped back down to lay in the water and enjoy the heat a little longer.

She didn’t want to dwell on the eerie forest anymore, so she made herself think back to earlier in the day, to Fakir’s visit. About Fakir himself. He was weird, and kind of rude, but maybe Edel was right that he meant well in his chidings to her about not letting her be careless about the fairies, however poorly it came off? He should try to be nicer, though. On the other hand, now that she thought about it more calmly, maybe he had a reason for being uncomfortable with being thanked and given gifts for helping people? He hadn’t spoken of one, but he _had_ said what he did about not wanting expensive things… maybe she’d been a little rude in pushing it? That idea made her insides squirm a little. Still, he’d accepted it in the end, and seemed fine with the idea of her bringing him something homemade. Well, maybe indifferent was a better word, but at least he didn’t seem entirely opposed to it. So she _would_ go through with it, now that she’d promised. Whatever she thought of him as a person, he deserved something for what he’d done, at the very least.

And what would Pike and Lilie say, if they knew she’d been rescued by such a handsome knight? Ahiru sank down further in the water to muffle a tiny giggle at the thought of Lilie’s expression in particular. She would never tell them because she didn’t want to get teased, especially when their fanciful ideas had no chance of becoming reality, but it was amusing to picture their initial reactions nonetheless because it really _was_ a bit like something out of a fairy tale. That was where the similarity ended, though, she acknowledged, letting out her breath and sending bubbles up to the surface of the bath. She doubted she was his type – she probably wasn’t _anyone’s_ type, if she was honest with herself – and she didn’t think she actually _wanted_ to have some sort of romantic escapade with someone like him anyway, not with that unpleasant personality of his. So it wasn’t a big loss.

She was no closer to figuring out what she wanted to make for him as she snuggled into her pillow and drifted off to sleep, but at least it was a more pleasant line of thought than creepy forests and glowing eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Grunewald: Means "green forest" from German _grüne_ "green", _Wald_ "forest".


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to my dear friend moelskerdeg, who gave me invaluable feedback and the idea for Freya's glasses.

Birds chirping outside woke Ahiru in the morning; she blinked in the dim light that her barely-open window let in and stayed where she was. The pillow under her head and the sheets she’d pulled up to her chin were so soft and warm that the impulse to close her eyes again and return to sleep was strong, but she knew she ought to get up and get going. She could tell that it was about time to wake up anyway, after all, and besides, she wanted to look outside and see if she could spot any birds. That won the contest in the end, and with a deep yawn she pulled herself up and opened the window the rest of the way, leaning her elbows on the sill.

A perfect autumn morning greeted her – she could feel the faint, pale warmth of the sun, and just through the branches of the trees she saw white clouds drifting lazily across the blue sky. A pleasantly crisp breeze teased the loose strands of her hair, and she smiled sleepily even as she returned her attention to trying to find the birds that she’d heard calling. She couldn’t spot any for a few minutes, but after a bit of searching saw what looked like a woodpecker perched on one of the trees at the entrance to the forest. Ahiru watched it for a moment before looking around some more, her gaze landing on one of the oak’s branches just in time to see a finch take flight. Her smile widened at the sight. She did so love birds, and had made a habit of buying a bit of seed every week back in the city to help feed the ones that lived there, scrabbling for food in an environment that wasn’t entirely welcoming to them. This seemed like a much kinder place for them to live, so many trees for them to nest in and find food from. Would they still need help? She resolved herself to ask Edel at breakfast; they were heading to the market today, and if she could find some seed there maybe she’d buy it and set out a bowl for them on the outer sill of her window.

With that thought foremost in her mind she bounded out of bed and set about getting ready for the day. She started by washing her face with the water she kept in a bowl on the chest of drawers, and then brushed and braided her hair before changing into a new chemise. Next came choosing a dress: what should she wear for her first day out and about in Goldkrone? Ahiru wanted to look nice, especially since she wouldn’t be covering her dress with a work robe the way she did every other day. She gave a critical look to all the dresses she had available, and finally chose a pale yellow one with white lace trim at the modest neckline and the cuffs of the short sleeves. One of the few positive comments she’d ever gotten about her looks was that yellow was a color that suited her, and she especially liked this shade, as it reminded her of the downy feathers of certain ducklings. As ducks were her favorite bird that was definitely a plus.

She finished off the ensemble with a bit of jewelry – the one piece that hadn’t been taken and sold in the flurry of auctioning that had followed Herr Drosselmeyer’s death. It had been deemed worthless as it was only costume jewelry instead of the real thing, but as a possession of her late mother it meant everything to her. It wasn’t anything fancy, just an oval-cut red “jewel” on a simple chain, but she found it pretty in its own way. She wished she’d had the chance to ask her mother where she’d gotten it, what the story behind it was, but sadly she would never know. She fastened it around her neck and examined herself one last time to make sure everything was as in place as it could be – some parts of her hair would _never_ stay where they were meant to, no matter how much effort she put into taming it – and then hurried out of her room towards the kitchen.

When she got there, Edel was still putting together a breakfast spread; she slid into her chair and waited, working up the nerve to ask what she wanted to ask while toying with the end of her long braid. Pike and Lilie had scoffed at her bird-feeding habit, and they hadn’t been the only city people not to understand her love of birds – indeed, of all animals – so she felt self-conscious about asking Edel for information on the subject. She watched as item after item was placed on the table, finishing with cups of steaming tea, and only when Edel had begun to fill her plate did she finally take a deep breath and prepare to make her inquiry.

“Edel?” Ahiru asked, trying to sound casual as she reached for a roll.

“Yes?” Edel didn’t even glance up from where she was arranging slices of bread and cheese on a piece of bread.

“Do you, um… do you know if…” Ahiru pretended to focus on spreading jam on her roll. “Do they… sell bird seed at the market anywhere?”

“Hmmm…” Edel chewed a bite of her sandwich, and then washed it down with a sip of tea. “I’m not sure… I’ve never gone looking for it, so it’s possible I missed it. I tend to go for a few specific things and don’t usually spend extra time browsing unless I need something for someone else and I’m not sure what to get. We’ll look around for it, if you want.”

“Y-yeah, that – I’d love that.” Ahiru brightened, relieved that she hadn’t been questioned in the slightest. “Thank you!”

“Of course.” Edel returned to eating her breakfast, and they both ate in silence after that. Once they’d finished they cleaned up as usual before fetching their cloaks and handbags and setting out.

It didn’t take them long to reach the town center where the marketplace was located, and when they did Ahiru couldn’t help but be impressed, despite having grown up in a much larger city. She’d never been to a market quite like this before, having lived in homes where servants did all the shopping for mundane things like food and other household supplies; it was another entirely new experience for her. The sheer amount of stalls and booths was a little overwhelming, but also exciting – she couldn’t wait to see what each one had to offer, and so many faces looked friendly that she wanted to talk to everyone.

They bought vegetables and fruits first, visiting various stands run by farmers who’d brought their produce and had it displayed in heaping, colorful piles that threatened to spill onto the cobblestone streets. Edel showed her how to pick the best ones, and bought a few bagfuls. The apples smelled especially good, Ahiru thought, and the vegetables looked like they would cook up beautifully in their meals; she was particularly happy that they were going home with potatoes and beets, two of her favorites. Another stall, run by a pudgy man with a round and friendly face, sold various grains and seeds and flours, and Edel paused to peruse the different bins he had arranged there.

“Do you know how to bake bread, Ahiru?” Edel asked as she measured some cracked wheat into a small bag.

“No.” Ahiru shook her head and sighed. “I – I always wanted to learn, but I was told it wasn’t appropriate for me given my station.” Her expression turned pouty. “I thought that was silly… and now I don’t know anything useful like that… n-not that witchcraft isn’t useful, b-but I want to learn other stuff too, so I can cook my own food.”

“Well, it isn’t too late to learn.” Edel tied up the little bag, and then moved on to the bin of barley. “And maybe now would be a particularly good time for it.”

“O-oh? How come?” Ahiru tilted her head. “I – I mean, th-thank you, I’d love to learn any time you wanted to teach me, but why is now really good?”

“Because you need to give Fakir something homemade as thanks for saving your life, right? And I happen to know the recipe for his favorite bread.” She looked over at Ahiru with a gleam in her eye. “I could teach you how, and you could make that bread and bring it to him. It’s been a while since he’s had my bread… I don’t know how the castle chef that makes the knights their meals up there does with bread, but I’d wager they don’t know how to make this recipe.”

“R-really?” Ahiru’s eyes widened and lit up. “Th-that’s – that sounds like a great idea, I’d love to do that! Will you show me?”

“Of course.” Edel smiled. “I’m glad you like the idea.”

“I – I love it!” Ahiru beamed. “Thank you!”

“You’re very welcome.” Edel spooned some barley into another bag. “I’ll get the flour we need for it, and we’ll stop at the spice seller for the spices we need. It’s one his mother used to make, an old recipe passed down in her family.”

“Are you related to her?” Ahiru asked as she watched Edel measure out wheat flour. “Or his father?”

“His father and I are half-siblings. Or should I say, we _were_.” Edel sighed. “His parents died when he was very young, I’m afraid.”

“Oh no…” Ahiru’s face fell. “I – I’m so sorry… I didn’t know, I shouldn’t have asked…”

“It’s fine, Ahiru. How could you have known?” Edel reached over and squeezed Ahiru’s hands. “He and I… we weren’t close, because we didn’t share both parents, and he was much older than I. It wasn’t that we hated each other, we got along well, but there wasn’t much of a chance to get truly close.”

“Th-that makes sense.” Ahiru peered into a bin filled nearly to the brim with corn meal.

“Yes.” Edel paid for her purchases, and then they took off again. “When his parents died, I was still too young to take in a child, and had already started my apprenticeship besides, with the woman that was my predecessor,” she continued as they walked away. “He ended up being raised by his godfather, a family friend who lives not far from where we live now, because his grandparents – my parents – had already passed on as well. That was what necessitated my early apprenticeship, you see… my situation was not terribly different from your current one.”

“Is – is that why you agreed to take me on?” Ahiru asked in a small voice.

“Yes and no.” Edel paused to look over her shopping list. “I saw myself in you, and wanted to help you. But the rest of it was also genuine interest in you, because of what I told you before about being able to tell that you are a girl of good character. I was not motivated by pity, if you’re afraid of that.”

“Oh no, I – well, okay, I guess maybe for a second I thought that…” Ahiru hung her head. “B-but that’d be okay too, I guess, cause it doesn’t change that you took me in, and you already told me that stuff about my character and having high hopes for me, and I don’t think you were just making that up or anything, so I was just curious and I’m just… I’m glad to be here either way.”

“And I am glad to have you here.” Edel smiled. “Now then, come over this way, we’ll get those spices. And what do you think about putting together a tea blend, as something for him to drink with the bread? I know a bit about his tastes in _that_ , too.”

“Ooh, okay!” Ahiru brightened. “That sounds really good!”

They made their way to a large stall where spices and tea and other imported dry goods were sold, after traveling countless miles along the trade routes from the east. Edel selected what she explained were manageable quantities of each spice and a couple teas – that is, what they would be able to use before they lost some of their flavor. It was best, she said, to buy only what you needed and come back to the stall when you ran out, rather than buy too large an amount and not be able to use it all while it was at its peak freshness. Of certain ones, however, she bought a bit more than she usually would, as they would be using some for Ahiru’s gift to Fakir.

“We also need some more beeswax, and honey, and other such related things,” Edel said after they finished at the spice-seller. She had her list in her hand again, scanning it for what she hadn’t yet purchased. “This way, Ahiru – we’ll get those things from the beekeeper.”

“O-okay,” Ahiru said, hurrying to stay beside Edel as she waded through the crowd, not wanting to lose sight of her. On a busy corner of one of the wide aisles of the marketplace stood the stand they were aiming for. A pretty, curvaceous woman with olive skin and long brown hair had just completed a transaction, handing an older man with pale, pock-marked skin and wispy white hair a jar of something after taking a few coins from him; she waved to him and said something presumably friendly as he walked off. Her attention was then drawn to Ahiru and Edel as they approached, and her face lit up.

“Edel! How pleasant to see you!” She clapped her hands together. “Come for more supplies? And who’s this cute girl you’ve got with you – that apprentice you said was coming?”

“Indeed.” Edel smiled. “Raetsel, this is Ahiru Klein, my new apprentice. Ahiru, this is Raetsel Linden, my friend and a talented beekeeper.”

“Oh, do stop.” Raetsel waved a hand at her, though she was laughing. “Ahiru, it’s lovely to meet you at last.” She took one of Ahiru’s hands in hers and shook it. “I hope you’re settling in well, and that Edel isn’t being hard on you?” She winked.

“Oh no, not at all!” Ahiru shook her head. “I – I mean, she’s not being hard on me, she’s been really wonderful, a-and I’m settling in really well, thank you, I love it here… a-and it’s nice to meet you too, sorry, I should’ve said that before, sorry…”

“That’s fine, don’t stress yourself.” Raetsel patted her cheek. “You have nothing to be sorry for.” She let go of Ahiru and turned back to Edel. “You found yourself a real sweetie, Edel – good job! I think your customers are going to like being tended by someone like her.”

“Now, Raetsel, don’t embarrass her,” Edel scolded as Ahiru turned bright red and hid her face behind her hands. “Or I might be tempted to take my business elsewhere.”

“Oh, as if you’d ever do anything of the sort!” Raetsel laughed and tossed her hair. “You know as well as I do that I provide you with the best beeswax you’ve ever worked with. You’d _never_ go back to sub-par ointments and you know it.”

“You do know me too well.” Edel heaved a mock sigh. “Very well, I’ll stay, and buy all my things from you. For today, anyway.”

“And every other day,” Raetsel said with a laugh. “Now then, what’s on your list this fine morning?”

“As you probably suspect, I need more beeswax,” Edel replied. “I need some candles as well, and honey.”

“Good, good.” Raetsel nodded in approval. “How much of each do you need?”

While Edel told Raetsel what she needed, Ahiru perused the jars of honey and beeswax candles. The honey was arranged by which kinds of flowers the bees had gotten nectar from, each one showing a subtly different hue. Most of them were varieties she’d never tried before, indeed, some she’d never even seen before. Edel chose jars of clover and wildflower honey, along with several long taper candles, and three jars of beeswax that she stored in the heavy cloth bag she’d brought along. They bid Raetsel farewell as soon as she’d been paid, and then moved on.

“We’re in need of milk and cheese as well,” Edel announced as they walked away. “That shouldn’t be far from here.” Scanning the stalls, she led Ahiru up one aisle and down another, to a large stand laden with bottles of milk and carefully wrapped parcels of cheese and butter. A tall, pale woman with brown hair tightly braided around her head and a pleasant face sat on a stool behind the counter, and leapt up as Edel approached.

“Oh! Miss Edel!” She beamed at her. “How lovely, I was hoping you’d stop by today!”

“I wouldn’t dream of skipping it, Nan.” Edel smiled back. “Your farm is one of the best in town and you know it.”

“Oh, you’re too kind,” she said with a blush. “And – oh, my dear, I’m so sorry,” she added as she spotted Ahiru. “I’ll be with you in just a moment, just let me grab some things for Edel here…”

“Actually, Nan, she’s with me,” Edel said. “This is Ahiru Klein, my new apprentice. Ahiru, this is Nan Geiszler, she runs a small goat farm and sells excellent things from it at market.”

“Your – oh, forgive me, I had clean forgotten that you mentioned having an apprentice on the way!” Nan went scarlet. “A thousand apologies! And Ahiru, how lovely to meet you! How are you finding Goldkrone?”

“It – it’s really great, thanks,” Ahiru said. She extended one of her hands. “It’s nice to meet you too, Miss Geiszler.”

“Please, call me Nan,” she said as she shook Ahiru’s hand. “I’m glad to hear you’re liking it here, though.”

“Oh, yes!” Ahiru nodded. “It’s so pretty, and I love Edel’s house, and everyone I’ve met so far is really nice, too.” Well, except for one. Sort of. “And Edel’s really good at teaching me, so I like being her apprentice. I’m happy I moved here.”

“Good, that’s so good to hear.” Nan smiled warmly, and then turned back to Edel. “So, what do you need today? Milk, probably, and…?”

“Some cheese too,” Edel said. “And I suppose now that I think about it that I should buy some butter as well. Wouldn’t hurt, anyway.”

“Well, I’ve got a few different cheeses here, including some new ones, I was feeling experimental, so…”

Ahiru wandered off while Edel and Nan discussed the various kinds of cheese for sale. It wasn’t that she was uninterested, but something had caught her eye that she needed to take a quick look at: just across the aisle, another stall was piled high with all kinds of flowers in every color. Their irresistible scent caught her nose as she moved closer and she inhaled deeply to savor it. A pale, golden-haired girl with glasses who looked to be only a little bit older than Ahiru sat on a stool behind it, scribbling things down in a notebook as hastily as she could.

“Wow…” Ahiru breathed. “So pretty…” She stepped up to the counter. “U-um, how much are these?” The girl didn’t look up, but kept writing. “Um, hello?” She raised her voice slightly, and leaned closer. “H-how much…”

“Eh?” The girl finally looked up, as Ahiru’s shadow fell across her notebook. “Oh! Forgive me, I didn’t see you there, so I don’t know what you said! Would you mind repeating it?” Her voice was soft and gentle, and she spoke so quietly that Ahiru had to lean even closer. “I’m sorry, I just needed a moment to write down what I’ve sold so far... I meant to look up after a few more numbers…”

“Didn’t… see me?” Ahiru tilted her head. “What do you mean?”

“What do I – oh, I’ve never seen you before, so you must not know.” She smiled. “I can’t really hear you, you see. Speaking of that, can you hear _me_ all right? I noticed you leaned forward a bit.”

“U-um, yeah, could you speak up a little?” Ahiru fidgeted. “Sorry…”

“It’s all right.” She raised her voice slightly. “Is this better?”

“Yes!” Ahiru nodded. “Th-thank you, sorry…”

“It’s fine, I don’t mind.” Freya shook her head. “Anyway, to continue explaining… I have to look at you to know what you’re saying.” She pointed to her glasses, which on closer inspection had tiny symbols beautifully etched into the frames. “When I’m wearing these, the charm attached to them allows me to see the words you speak in the air, as though I’m reading a book.”

“Oh! I get it!” Ahiru nodded. “W-wow, that’s really neat! I mean…” She flushed. “It – it’s neat that you have something like that to help you out, not that you can’t hear me… a-although, there’s nothing wrong with that either, I didn’t mean it like that, it’s…” She bowed her head. “I – I’m sorry…”

“Don’t be, don’t be, I knew what you meant,” she said consolingly. She reached across the counter and took Ahiru’s hands, making her heart flutter – she really was very beautiful. “I’m Freya Blumenthal – what’s your name? I don’t think we’ve ever met before.”

“N-no, we haven’t.” Ahiru shook her head. “I – I’m Ahiru Klein, I just moved here very recently… I work with Edel Steuben as her apprentice.”

“Oh, Miss Edel!” Freya’s eyes lit up. “Yes, she’s wonderful, isn’t she? I imagine you’re getting on nicely with her? And how do you like Goldkrone so far?”

“I – I love it!” Ahiru found herself squeezing Freya’s hands without meaning to, and then blushed and let go of them. “A-and you’re right, Edel’s really nice, I love living with her and learning witchcraft… she’s over there at Miss Geiszler’s stall picking cheese, and I saw your flowers, and I wanted to look at them cause they’re so pretty and then I saw you and wanted to ask you how much they are and then… w-well, yeah.” She blushed again.

“Why, thank you!” Freya beamed at her. “I’m sure the flowers are happy to hear such things. As for how much they are, it really depends on what you want. Did you have any specific ones in mind?”

“Um… not really…” Ahiru felt her face warm again. “I – I don’t really know much about flowers, and they’re all so pretty… I don’t know if I can decide…”

“Hmmm, well, how about this?” Freya tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “Why don’t I put together a small bouquet for you, of flowers that suit you? That would only cost you a couple of coins, and you could take them home and put them in a vase and keep them for a while, as long as you remember to change the water.”

Ahiru’s eyes went wide. “Oh, oh no, I – I couldn’t ask you to go to such trouble just for _me_ …”

“Don’t be silly, it wouldn’t be any trouble at all,” Freya said with another smile. “I can already tell which ones want to go home with you.”

“Really?”

“Oh yes.” Freya nodded. “Before I fell ill – and it was thanks to Miss Edel’s wonderful medicines that I recovered – I was able to hear what they wanted to tell me. I can’t hear my flowers anymore, of course, but that doesn’t mean we can’t communicate at all, they’ve found other ways. And now they’re telling me which ones should be chosen for you.”

“Wow, that’s… that’s really neat.” Ahiru tore her eyes away from Freya’s face and let her gaze roam over the many blooms stacked around her. “Th-then, definitely, please, make a bouquet for me, I don’t want them to be unhappy if they really want to come home with me…”

“I’d be glad to.” Freya reached over and squeezed her hand. “Now, it’ll only take me a few minutes, but I’ll have to look away from you, so if you want to say anything, just touch my hand or something to let me know, all right? I can hear a little bit in this ear –” She tapped her left ear, and Ahiru abruptly realized that Freya had been tilting her that side of her head towards her the entire time they talked – “– but it can be difficult in a noisy place like this. I was trying to write as fast I could before so that I didn’t miss any customers, but, well…” She laughed. “Anyway, that’s what I’ll need you to do if you have to tell me something, okay?”

“A-all right.” Ahiru nodded. She couldn’t think of anything to say, however, and was content to simply watch Freya as she selected flowers and arranged them into a small bouquet that she tied with a plain white ribbon.

“Here you go.” Freya handed her the bouquet with a smile. “I selected yellow roses, cornflowers – because they match your eyes – and some baby’s breath. I hope you like it.”

“I – I love it!” Ahiru found herself blushing again at the comment about her eyes. “Thank you so much! It’s beautiful!” She reached for her handbag and opened it with one hand, the bouquet carefully held in the other. “A-a couple of coins, you said?”

“Yes.” Freya nodded. She waited until Ahiru had dug out the coins and handed them to her before speaking again. “Thank _you_ , Ahiru – the flowers are happy. I hope you’ll take good care of them.”

“I – I will!” Ahiru lifted them to her nose and sniffed their fragrance, and smiled. “I – I’m glad they’re happy… a-and I definitely want to come back and get more next time I’m here!”

“I’m glad to hear it. Both of those things, that is,” Freya amended. “My stall is always here, even in the winter, so I’ll look forward to seeing you again. It’s been lovely to meet you.”

“Y-yes, me too!” Ahiru nodded. “I – I’ll definitely come back, and I look forward to it, and it was really really nice to meet you too!” She curtsied. “I probably gotta get back to Edel now… bye! Have a good day!”

“You too,” she heard Freya call after her as she hurried back across the aisle. She didn’t make it far before she nearly collided with Edel, on her way over after finishing her purchases at Nan’s stall.

“Ah, there you are,” Edel said. She eyed the flowers in her hand. “Oh, so you found your way to Miss Freya’s shop?”

“Y-yes.” Ahiru blushed. “Is – is that okay? I just wanted to look, and then I thought it’d be nice to bring some flowers home, but I couldn’t decide, so she made a bouquet for me, and it was only a couple coins and she was so nice, and…”

“Of course it is,” Edel interrupted her. “Freya’s a lovely girl, yes. And why should it be a problem for you to spend your own money how you like? Moreover, those flowers will look lovely in a vase, I think I have just the one… you’ll have to decide where you want to display them.”

“O-oh, okay, that’s good, I mean…” Ahiru bit her lip. “I just… I didn’t know if it’d be okay to wander off, I don’t want to get lost…”

“It’s fine,” Edel assured her. “But now that you mention being lost…” She rummaged around in her handbag and withdrew an irregular-shaped hunk of wood that had a sigil carved into it and a tiny green gem embedded at the tip. “Take this. If we become separated, here or in the forest, I will be able to find you by activating the spell that links it with its mate. I should have given it to you earlier, but I was so distracted that it slipped my mind. Forgive me.”

“It’s okay.” Ahiru took the amulet from her, and slipped it into her own bag. “Th-thank you, that makes me feel better…”

“I’m glad.” Edel smiled. “Now then, I have one more stop to make – I need to visit the sausage-maker for some meat. Do you want to look around a bit for your bird seed while I peruse his wares? Now that you have that, you needn’t worry about me being unable to find you in the crowds.”

“Oh! Oh yeah! I – I really do!” Ahiru nodded. “Th-thank you, I almost forgot…”

“You’re welcome.” Edel reached over and squeezed her hand. “I’ll be off, then – take your time, and I’ll come find you when I’m done. If you haven’t found any by then, we’ll look together.”

“O-okay! Thanks!” Ahiru watched Edel walk away and then headed off too, looking carefully at every stall she passed. There were so many things being offered for sale here, and she wanted to browse all of them, but she didn’t pause. There simply wasn’t time, in her opinion – she wanted to find her bird seed before Edel finished buying sausages, and then go home. Not because she wasn’t having fun, and she knew Edel would help her look if she still hadn’t found it by the time she got back to her, but because she felt guilty at the thought of keeping her here any longer just for something for her, especially as it was already drawing near to lunch time.

Fortunately she didn’t have to go very far before she found what she was searching for. Two aisles away from where Freya and Nan Geiszler kept their stalls, a nervous young man named Dylan Armbruster was helping to mind his uncle’s grain and dry goods stand, and he relaxed a little when she told him she only wanted a bag of seeds and grains suitable for birds, if that was available. It was indeed, and she happily scooped plenty of it into a bag and paid for it with a couple more coins.

With that task accomplished Ahiru found herself relaxing quite a bit too. Now she could wander more freely and take her time looking around at what else the market had to offer while she waited for Edel to find her. She didn’t want to make her search very hard, though, so she tried to head back the way she came, or at least in that general direction. It didn’t occur to her till she was halfway back that she didn’t actually know where the sausage maker’s stand was, so it was possible that going back to the aisle where Edel had left her might, in fact, be worse. Her shoulders slumping, she turned round again, intending to go back to where she’d found the bird seed and look at the other stalls in that section.

She wasn’t really paying the most attention to the people around her, however, and as she hurried around a corner she collided sharply with someone heading in her direction, sending her down to the ground. By some miracle she held onto her bird seed bag, but her bouquet from Freya dropped onto the street beside her. She looked frantically around for it as she heard the person she’d bumped into curse in some foreign language, and she spotted it just as a boot-clad foot nearly trod on it. A large brown hand rescued it in time, though, and held it out to her. “Here. Be more careful next time.”

“F-Fakir?” She looked up at the owner of the hand, and felt her insides squirm at the look on his face. “I, I, um… thank you… s-sorry.” She took the bouquet from him, and rose to her feet, clutching the bag of bird seed almost protectively to her. “I – I didn’t mean to…”

 “I could tell.” He studied her. “Are you hurt?”

“N-no.” Ahiru shook her head. “A-are you?”

Fakir rolled his eyes. “Don’t worry about me, idiot – I’m not the one who was running around and then fell down.”

“I…” Ahiru flushed. “I mean… th-that’s true, but still… I – I don’t want to… I mean, I could’ve stepped on your foot, or – or… you don’t have to be rude, I already said I was sorry…”

“… I know.” His expression relaxed slightly. “I – well, I’m fine, all right? You didn’t do any harm, so don’t feel bad about it. Just watch where you’re going next time so you don’t get yourself hurt.”

Ahiru blinked. Was that his weird way of accepting her apology? “Um, okay… an-and thank you for getting my flowers for me, I would’ve been really sad if they’d gotten stepped on…”

“You’re welcome.” His gaze strayed to the other parcel she was carrying. “… Is that bird seed?”

“Um, y-yeah.” She clutched it a little tighter. Did he think it was silly? Was he going to laugh or scoff at her, the way Pike and Lilie had? “I, I, um… I really like feeding birds cause I really like birds, so, so I thought I’d buy some for them…”

She feared a disdainful look, the kind so many others had directed at her when they learned of her penchant for bird-feeding, but instead his eyes seemed to soften, and she again found herself struck by their color. They really were very green; they reminded her of moss, or maybe the needles on a pine tree. “That’s… kind of you.”

“Y-you think so?” Her mouth fell open slightly. “Y-you don’t think it’s silly or stupid?”

Fakir raised an eyebrow. “What’s silly or stupid about providing for other living things?”

“I – I don’t know… I mean…” She looked down at her feet. “I don’t think there is, just… back in the city where I lived in before I came here, nobody really understood why I wanted to do it… they’d laugh at me, or roll their eyes, and tell me they were just wild animals and they could fend for themselves, that I was just wasting my money and my time trying to feed them.”

“Typical.” She looked up to see his mouth curl in a sneer. “I’m not surprised that city people would take such an attitude.”

She tilted her head. “You don’t have a high opinion of city people, do you?”

“I can’t say I do,” Fakir admitted with a shrug. “They’re so distant from the Fair Folk these days that they grow lax, and let the old tales and ways that used to preserve their safety fall into obscurity, and they don’t seem to care for the land and its creatures either. And then they look down on those of us who do. Of all the ones I’ve met as they passed through here, there are none I’d care to maintain contact with.”

“… Oh.” Ahiru swallowed. “So then, I –”

“Don’t lump yourself in with them – that’s not what I was saying.” Was it her imagination, or did he look slightly uncomfortable? “You’re not a tourist passing through, are you? You came to live here of your own accord. And I’ve not heard you say anything rude about this place, the way the other travelers from the cities have.”

The irony of Fakir complaining about the rudeness of others wasn’t lost on Ahiru; she had to fight to keep herself from giggling. “W-well, no, that’s true, a-and I really like it here, I think it’s so pretty and everyone’s friendly and I like learning from Edel… and I _do_ understand where you’re coming from, I really do, cause people I knew a-and even my friends said some kinda mean things about the country before I left and I saw how wrong and kinda snobby they were even before I got here, cause of how they talked about the stops and stuff on the road and the coach and everything… b-but, if you don’t dislike me cause I’m from the city, then why did you want to reject my gift for saving my life? I – I thought maybe I’d been rude and pushed you into it when you didn’t want to have anything to do with me cause you hated me, but if it’s not that, then…?”

“I… I don’t _hate_ you.” He frowned. “How could I? I don’t even _know_ you, and you… well, like I said, you didn’t act like the other city people I’ve met.”

“Then why?” Ahiru pressed. “I – I’m sorry if I’m being rude now, but I just want to know, cause if you really don’t want me to and you’re not okay with it, I won’t do anything, I don’t want to do something when you really don’t want it…”

“It’s not…” Fakir took a moment, presumably to gather his thoughts. “It’s not that I don’t want… it’s that… well… I’ve never felt that I _deserved_ such gratitude for simply doing my duty as a knight.” He _definitely_ looked uncomfortable now. “It’s nothing to do with you, I just…” He trailed off.

“Oh.” Ahiru looked down at her feet. “Then… then I shouldn’t do anything? I don’t want to do something that’ll make you uncomfortable.”

“I didn’t say that.” She looked up as he sighed. “My personal feelings on the matter aren’t your problem. If you feel that you need to express your gratitude by making something for me, then I’d be the rude one to refuse you – you and Edel both made that clear the other day. If you still want to do something, go ahead.”

“It’s really okay, then?” Ahiru persisted. “You don’t mind?”

Fakir rolled his eyes again. “Didn’t I just say that? Do what you want, I won’t turn you away.”

“O-okay!” Ahiru brightened. “Um, do you mind if I tell you what it is I’m thinking of?”

Amusement seemed to briefly flicker in his eyes. “You don’t care about it being a surprise, then?”

“W-well, I mean… maybe if it was a birthday present or something I would, but… but I just want to make sure my idea’s okay.” Ahiru adjusted the bag of bird seed in her arms. “Edel said she knows your favorite bread recipe and that it’s been a while since you’ve had it probably, so I was going to make that for you, but I don’t know if it’s okay for you to have food in your room at the castle, so…”

“Don’t worry about that.” He shook his head. “It’s perfectly permissible in the knights’ dormitory to keep food in one’s room. So a gift of bread would be acceptable.” Did he wince slightly at his choice of words? She couldn’t tell.

“O-okay, that’s good!” Ahiru beamed at him. “I’m glad, cause I don’t have any other ideas and I really want to make something soon and it sounded like a nice treat to give you homemade bread… I mean, I’m sure the castle food is good too, but it’s probably not the same as having your favorite foods made, you know?”

Fakir’s mouth quirked into what _almost_ looked like a smile, and she felt her heart flutter again, the way it had when Freya had touched her hands. “Yes. I know. It… it would be… thank you.”

Ahiru’s eyes widened. “B-but I haven’t done anything yet, I don’t… you haven’t even tasted it, it might be really bad…”

“If Edel’s helping you, then it won’t be. She’s very good.” He looked nostalgic. “I grew up close to her house – that is, it’s her house _now_ – and she always used to bring things over.”

“Oh – oh yeah, Edel told me earlier that you lived nearby.” Ahiru didn’t want to mention what else she’d told her. “Do you ever miss it? I probably would, I mean… I’m sure the castle’s nice too, but I grew up in kinda fancy houses in the city and I guess they were pretty but I like Edel’s house a lot more, I like how quiet and cozy it is, and being near the trees… my friends tried to scare me about telling me about fairies in the trees, and I saw the border yesterday and it was kinda weird, but I still really like trees and the forest despite that… I don’t mind living close to it, and there are more birds and animals and stuff there too…”

“… Sometimes.” An odd look she couldn’t read passed over his face. “I do like the castle, you’re not wrong, but… you’re right that there’s a charm to the area where you live now that’s absent from the palace.” He looked down at her for a moment, and she felt her face warm as she wondered what was going through his mind. “You’re… I’m glad Edel has an apprentice who appreciates the land and the life that lives on it the way it should be.”

“I, I…” Ahiru stammered, her cheeks heating up even further. “I just… um… well, I – I guess that’s part of why I wanted to be a witch, I mean, I also kind of _had_ to do _something_ since my guardian died and I have no money or anything, but this really appealed to me cause I want to help people and this sounded like a nice place to live so I wasn’t afraid to apply here… but, but I’m really not… I’m not anything special, I just really like birds and trees and animals…”

“Special or not, it’s a good quality to have, especially in your line of work.” She still couldn’t read his expression. “Or what will be your line of work, anyway.” He seemed to go a little pink himself, and then cleared his throat. “Anyway, I’ve probably kept you long enough, and I need to get back too.” Ahiru noticed for the first time that he was carrying a cloth bag over his shoulder, laden down with purchases of his own that made various different shapes in the fabric. “I’ll… see you around, I suppose.”

“B-bye!” Ahiru waved at him as he walked off. “It – it was nice talking to you!” He didn’t look back, and she didn’t know if he heard her, but Fakir nevertheless raised his hand in a gesture of farewell as he disappeared into the crowd. She watched him until he vanished from her view, his dark head visible above a lot of other people’s for a while due to his height, and then continued in the direction she’d been going before her literal run-in with him.

Maybe he wasn’t such a bad guy after all, she mused as she idly browsed the wares at a nearby stall. Still weird, yes – there was no denying that. But not as bad as she’d thought, either. Perhaps they could even be friends? She wouldn’t mind that at all.

She was still mulling over his strange – but not entirely unpleasant – behavior some ten minutes later, when Edel finally appeared at her side. “There you are, Ahiru. I hope you weren’t too bored?” Her eyes fell on the bag Ahiru carried. “I see you found some bird seed.”

“Yes!” Ahiru nodded. “I – I got what I thought was a good amount to feed them with, do you think it’s enough? Or is it too much?” Worry clouded her expression as she recalled what Edel had told her about buying things like spices and teas.

“It looks fine to me.” She smiled. “Don’t worry. Things like bird seed tend to last longer than cooking ingredients, so even if you still have some left over by the next time we come to market, it won’t go to waste. I’m sure the birds will appreciate it all.”

“O-okay, good!” Ahiru brightened. “So, um, is that all we need, then?”

“Yes.” Edel patted the bags hanging from her arm. Both arms, in fact, were laden with them, and she’d gently refused to let Ahiru take on any of the load when she’d offered earlier. “If you’re ready, we can head on home and put these things away and have lunch… but if you want to stay a little longer and browse, that’s all right too.”

“N-no, I want – I want to go home and eat.” Ahiru’s stomach made a pitiful noise just then and she blushed, even as she and Edel both laughed. “A-and I’ve seen everything I want to see, I think… I can always look around more next time, too.”

“That’s true.” Edel smiled again. “Very well, we’ll head on home, and after we eat lunch do you want to put together that tea blend for Fakir?”

“Yes!” Ahiru nodded eagerly. “Th-that sounds great!” Now that Fakir seemed more at ease with receiving a gift she felt all the more enthusiastic about getting it ready and delivering it to him. “Oh, and um, I actually saw him while I was waiting for you…”

“Did you now?” Edel raised an eyebrow. “I hope he was friendlier than he was the other day.”

“He was.” Ahiru adjusted the bag of bird seed again as she followed Edel back through the market, back towards home. “A-and I told him about what we’re planning, to make sure it was okay to have food in his castle room, and he said it was okay and he seemed to like the idea, so we should definitely make the bread…”

Edel inspected her shopping list one more time, and nodded to herself before placing it in her bag. “Good to know. I’m sure he’ll appreciate the gift, then.”

Ahiru glanced down at the items she carried, the bird seed and the bouquet. “I hope so.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Armbruster: Means "crossbow maker" from German _armbrust_ "crossbow". (If it isn't obvious, Dylan Armbruster is meant to be Armadylan.)  
>  Blumenthal: Derived from German _Blumen_ "flowers" and _thal_ "valley".  
>  Geiszler: From the German _geiss_ meaning "goat" and the suffix _ler_ signifying an occupation, thus "goat-herder". (Nan Geiszler is, thus, Miss Goatette.)  
>  Linden: Derived from German _linde_ meaning "lime tree".


	6. Chapter 6

Ahiru let out a little sigh in her sleep, one that sounded more like a chirp, and snuggled deeper into her pillow. In her arms she clutched the results of one of her sewing projects from years ago, when she’d been instructed on the “gentle art” by one of the few tutors Herr Drosselmeyer hadn’t been too cheap to hire for her education. It was another pillow, a large one, roughly in the shape of a duck; indeed, that was what it was meant to be. The fabric had faded and some of her stitches were uneven, but it remained soft and comforting, and helped her sleep.

She nuzzled it now, murmuring something incoherent as a small smile spread across her face. Another sigh escaped her and she rolled over, only to fall out of bed. “Waaaah!” Ahiru awoke in an instant as she hit the floor, the blow cushioned slightly by the pillow in her arms. “Ow…” She grimaced and rubbed her hip as she sat up and hugged her pillow more tightly, as if that would take away the new soreness.

A breeze from the window ruffled her hair, and just as she was about to let out a decidedly less content sigh than the ones in her sleep, birdsong reached her ears from very close by and worked an instant change on her mood. Her eyes widening, Ahiru climbed back onto the bed as carefully and quietly as she could, setting her duck pillow aside and moving into a kneeling position by the window. She could just glimpse a few birds gathered around the bowl of seed she’d left out the night before, and her face lit up with a smile as she watched them peck merrily at it, taking their fill before flying off and being replaced with different birds.

She watched for a while before finally tearing her attention away, and went about her usual morning rituals for grooming. She chose another one of her nicer dresses to wear, a white one with pink trim at the neckline and sleeves, because she and Edel had an appointment after breakfast to deliver medicines to a customer. She hadn’t yet met this one, so she desperately wanted to make a good first impression.

When she got to the kitchen, Edel had their breakfast spread arranged on the table already and was packing items into a basket for their delivery. Ahiru’s stomach dropped at the sight. “Am – am I late? I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to, I just – there were some birds eating the seed I left out and I wanted to watch them cause they looked so cute and happy and I’m glad I bought it for them, b-but I’m not glad I took too long, I don’t want to make us late…” She hung her head.  “I’m sorry…”

“Ahiru, relax.” Edel took a bag out and replaced it with another. “You’re right on time. I got an early start is all.”

“O-oh.” Ahiru sagged a little in relief. “Okay… I – I’ll go ahead and eat, then, if it’s okay…”

“Of course it is.” Edel paused to tighten the lid of a jar before placing it in the basket with the rest. “Please, help yourself. I’ll eat in a couple minutes once this is done.”

Ahiru sat down and began to serve herself, piling her plate with slices of meat and cheese and some bread, reaching for the honey and jam after making a sandwich. She poured herself some tea first and sweetened it with the honey, and then added butter and jam to the other warmed slices of bread. Edel had told her it was something of a long walk to the customer’s house because he lived a bit outside the town center, and so she knew she’d need to have plenty of energy.

Edel, true to her word, had everything arranged in the basket to her liking within a couple minutes, and after putting a cloth over it sat down beside Ahiru and served herself food. When they’d both finished eating they cleaned the dishes off before heading to the front of the house and fetching their cloaks from the wardrobe, the basket over Edel’s arm. She locked the front door behind them, and then they set out.

It indeed took them longer to reach the customer’s house than it had to reach the market the other day, but Ahiru found she didn’t mind so much. It wasn’t that much longer of a walk, and it was nice to be able to get a good look at more of Goldkrone as they went along. She found herself unable to decide where to look, her head turning from side to side to take in the buildings and people and various other things like streetlamps and trees. People here grew flowers in their windowsills, and left out what Edel explained to her were holders for bird seed, and a few people that had a little space in front of their houses even had herb gardens growing right there. Goldkrone, it seemed, while very much a city in its own right, was at the same time decidedly different from the city she’d grown up in. The citizens seemed to live closer to, and respect, nature in a way that no one she’d ever known before did. It warmed her heart and firmed her certainty that this was a place she could see as her home.

“Ah, here we are.” Edel pointed to the house they’d stopped at. It reminded Ahiru a bit of some of the nicer houses she’d grown up in and around, but it had a humbler feel to it and a smaller size. Additionally, it was only one story tall, something that would have been considered dreadfully low-class and unappealing by all the rich people she’d ever met. The fashion nowadays amongst the obscenely wealthy was to _add_ floors to their homes to make them taller, and it seemed that the more terrifying the staircase, the more “in” you were. Ahiru didn’t much care for that trend.

They headed up the short walk to the front door and Edel pulled the bell to notify the occupants of their arrival. A minute or so passed after the distant chime, and then the door opened to reveal a tall man in a black and white suit with a pale and youthful face framed by short hair that had gone completely grey, making for a bit of an odd contrast. He peered down at them from behind round spectacles, and relaxed as he saw Edel. “Ah, Miss Edel. Come in. I will fetch Mr. Katz shortly.”

“Thank you, Mr. Vogel.” Edel walked into the house as the butler moved aside to let them by, Ahiru following close behind like a nervous duckling. Mr. Vogel directed them to a little sitting room to wait and then disappeared to fetch his employer; Ahiru sank gingerly onto one of the seats, afraid of mussing it up somehow. It wasn’t as intimidating here as it had been at the Autenberg’s or any of their friends, but she still wanted to avoid doing any damage to the pretty furnishings out of respect for the man who owned them. Especially as this was someone paying them for their goods and services.

“Miss Edel, welcome.” Ahiru looked up to see Mr. Vogel opening the sitting room door to allow in a man who looked to be in his thirties, with sallow skin and violet hair that had the occasional thin line of grey in it. He smiled beneath his whiskery mustache, and advanced towards them with the aid of a cane that he held firmly to. “It’s always pleasant to see you.”

“You as well, Felix.” Edel rose from her seat and so did Ahiru, not sure if she was supposed to but not wanting to seem rude if she was. When the man with the cane had seated himself Edel walked the short distance over to him and shook his hand. “As you can see, there is someone I must introduce you to – my new apprentice, Ahiru Klein. Ahiru, this is Felix Katz.”

“Delighted to meet you, my dear.” Mr. Katz let go of his cane and extended a hand to Ahiru; she took it and they shook. “How is Goldkrone finding you? I’m sure Miss Edel is an excellent employer, mrrrr.”

“She is!” Ahiru nodded. “I – I really like working for her, and I love it here, it’s so pretty and nice and everyone’s been so kind… a-and it’s nice to meet you too, of course!”

“Good, good.” His mustache twitched. “Do sit down, you two mustn’t stand simply on my account.”

“Thank you.” Edel resumed her seat and Ahiru followed suit. “Now then, how have things been treating you lately? Are you in need of increased dosages of anything?”

“Mrrrrr, I think…” Mr. Katz paused to consider. “The pain itself hasn’t been any worse in terms of intensity, but with the weather growing more damp I think I shall be feeling more discomfort soon. And I am running low on that catnip tea…”

“Not to worry.” Edel pulled back the cloth atop her basket and retrieved a tin from it. “I’ve made you a fresh batch; just visited the spice seller the other day at market and bought plenty for a good new supply for you. I wrote down, you see, the date when I gave you your last bag, and I thought that it was coming close to the time in which you might be in need of more.”

“Good, good.” His mustache twitched again. “I must say, Miss Edel – I’ve only been in this town a couple of years, but I’m already more impressed with your work than I was with any witch back in my hometown. You anticipate the needs of your customers better than they did, and treat me with ever so much kindness.” He seemed to droop a little at that, as if recalling sad memories. “If you are training this young lady to follow in your footsteps in all things, why, then I think Goldkrone will ever be in good hands for many a year to come.”

“I am indeed.” Edel nodded. “And Ahiru herself is a kind girl, the best I could’ve hoped for.” Ahiru blushed and hid her face, and Mr. Katz let out a scratchy sort of laugh.

“Excellent! Then none in this town ever need fear that you will be replaced by someone who will fail to live up to your standards.” He took out a handkerchief and dabbed at his nose. “I am ever more glad by the day that I chose this place to move to. The fresh air does wonders for me, you are an exemplary witch, my neighbors are good, and I am grateful for the blessing that allowed me to find such a convenient house.” Mr. Katz sniffed disdainfully. “When I left the big city the thing that was just starting to come into fashion was making houses _taller_ , and everyone I knew looked at me as though I was a madman for desiring a house with only _one_ floor. They knew, of course, of my condition, but that has never let people stop themselves from being snobbish and close-minded.”

“A pity, that.” Edel sighed. “I have come up against it occasionally even here: those who cannot afford any sympathy to those who aren’t exactly like them, who cannot meet the same challenges they can without help, who do not act or react in the precise manner they approve of. It speaks ill of their character alone, however, rather than that of the ones they treat in such a disgraceful manner.”

“I agree.” His gaze strayed to Ahiru. “Ah, but… I fear the young lady here is looking a bit lost. Miss Edel, have you not explained my situation to her?”

“She knows the nature of the medicines we have brought to you,” Edel replied. “She has aided me in making them, in fact, and done excellent work.”

“I am glad to hear it. However, she should know a bit more.” Mr. Katz stroked his mustache thoughtfully. “Miss Ahiru, as you have no doubt surmised from the things you made and brought for me, as well as this handy object I use as aid when I walk…” He indicated the cane. “I am not entirely… whole, some would say.”

Ahiru frowned. “N-not me. There’s nothing wrong with needing a little help to get around, it doesn’t make you worse than someone else or anything like that, just different. It’s okay for people to have different needs, it doesn’t make anyone bad or incomplete…”

“Good answer.” He smiled. “No, I agree with you. But there are those who see my limitations as weaknesses of character, as though the days when I am unable to rise from my bed are personal failings rather than the result of my body not cooperating with what I would like it to be able to do. When I found I could no longer comfortably move with ease between the floors of my former house, people I had considered friends suddenly had their sympathies for me dry up, and they expressed in various ways their belief that I was simply not working hard enough to overcome these difficulties, to ‘recover’ from a permanent injury.”

“That – that’s so mean!” Ahiru burst out, her eyes flashing. “Just – just cause you can’t move around as well as they can doesn’t mean you aren’t working hard, and – and there’s a difference between working hard and pushing yourself too much, and what do they want out of you anyway, to push yourself and make things worse? And then they’d probably get even meaner about it and blame you, and… and there’s just no way to win with people like that, it’s just…” Her shoulders slumped and her eyes misted a little. “Why can’t people be more understanding? I don’t get it…”

“… I see what Miss Edel meant,” Mr. Katz said after studying Ahiru for several seconds. “You truly are a kind person, and I am greatly relieved to hear you speak so – this town is indeed blessed to have as Miss Edel’s successor someone who will help them without judgment, and show them all the compassion they deserve. I foresee great things in your future, and hope you will never lose that kind heart.”

Ahiru felt her face turn bright red, and she averted her eyes, her hands clutching at her skirt. “I – I… th-thank you, I mean, I don’t think… I don’t think I’m anything special, really, I just… I just think it’s really important to treat people well and to let them be themselves and not judge anyone, everybody has their own situation and their own pain to deal with and it’s not fair to expect anyone to be a certain way, they should be true to themselves and… and if somebody needs help with something they should get it and not be looked down on…”

“You are free to think you’re nothing special, of course, but I would disagree,” Mr. Katz said mildly. “I am already feeling at ease with having my care partially entrusted to you – now that you are working alongside Miss Edel I know I will be seeing more of you and that you will be taking an equal part in things – and that is no small feat. I saw a variety of doctors and witches when I lived in the city before coming here, and none were able to win my trust so easily. I suppose it is a sense of mine, to be able to sniff out the competent and kind from those who are only interested in making money from their patients. You do not at all seem to be the latter.”

“N-no, I’m not.” Ahiru shook her head. “I took this on because I want to help people… that’s the most important thing to me…”

“I’m glad to hear it.” He sat back in his chair and gave her a considering look. “Miss Ahiru, would it surprise you very much if I told you that I used to dance?”

“Really?” Ahiru’s eyes widened with interest. “I – I always wanted to learn, but I was never any good at it… what kind of dancing did you do?”

“Ballet.” He let out a sigh. “My parents spared no expense in instructing me in every subject they could think of, but my true interest was in taking to the stage as a dancer. They supported me in this dream, and I worked hard to achieve it… but alas, I had only a few short years of happiness in it before this injury ended my dreams.” He lightly tapped his knee. “It plagues me still, and ever will, until the end of my days. I must use this cane to move around, and as I have told you already ascending and descending staircases is too painful for me. Miss Edel creates fine medicines that ease the pain in various ways, and creates for me also things to aid my sleep, such as the catnip tea. Her work has greatly improved the quality of my life, hence my eternal gratitude to her and my gladness in having chosen this exact town to move to.”

Edel smiled. “It is my pleasure to provide this assistance to you.”

“You are a dear.” Mr. Katz gave her a warm look, and then returned his attention to Ahiru. “Now, lest you think I have gone idle in my old age and retirement…” He paused to let out another scratchy laugh. “That is not the case. I can get by more than easily enough on my own pension as well as my inheritance from my parents, so I have no need to make additional money, but I find that staying unoccupied for too long does not suit me, particularly when I often feel restless enough as it is due to my limited mobility.” He wiped at his nose again with the handkerchief. “Instead, I put my extensive education to good use for the people of this town and tutor those who are interested on the subject of literature. I have an especial interest in educating the younger folk, but I do not discriminate as I believe it is never too late to learn something new, and learning should not be withheld from anyone.”

“I – I agree.” Ahiru let out a wistful sigh. “Oh, I wish I’d been able to learn more about lots of different stuff… there’s so many interesting things out there, but my guardian was so cheap about hiring tutors, and only the ones he thought ‘suitable’ for me…” She sighed again.

“My dear, did you not hear what I just said?” Mr. Katz looked amused. “It is never too late to learn something new. If you are truly interested in the subject I would be happy to have you on as a student.”

“Wh-what? N-no, I…” Ahiru shook her head. “I – I mean… it sounds really good, don’t get me wrong, I’d love to learn from you and read lots of books but I don’t think I can, I mean… I don’t have that much money and I have other expenses and stuff so I couldn’t afford it… s-sorry…” Her face burning with embarrassment, she hung her head and stared down at the carpet. A smudge of wax worked into it, probably by a former owner of the house, caught her eye and she stared hard at it to try and distract herself.

“I think you misunderstand,” he said gently. “Or perhaps I haven’t explained that well enough, or at all. I do not charge for my services, Miss Ahiru – that would bar so many people from taking up the learning of something they have an interest in. And that is not something I am comfortable with. As I said, learning should not be withheld from anyone, and to me that is a thing I believe not just about people of various ages, but also those of various financial situations and social class. How, I ask you, is it fair for someone like me, born into every advantageous social class I could be, to have opportunities that are denied others simply because their birth did not place them in as privileged a position? Education should be open to all. If you wish to learn from me, all you need say is the word, and then we will work out a day and time for you to come here and receive lessons. That alone will complete the arrangements. If you are uninterested I will understand, of course, but you shouldn’t hold yourself back because you perceive it to be a matter of money. None shall be involved.”

“Oh! That’s… that’s different, then, I…” Ahiru swallowed and turned to Edel. “Oh, but, um… I should really ask you if it’s okay first, right? If you don’t want me to take time away from my learning things from you, then I won’t go, but if you say yes, I’d really like to learn stuff from Mr. Katz. Is it all right? I really do want to learn lots and lots of things that I haven’t been able to before…”

“Of course.” Edel smiled. “I can spare you one afternoon a week, Ahiru, it isn’t a hardship. Moreover, I’m happy you’re interested in expanding your mind and store of knowledge, it will make you a more well-rounded person and that’s always good.”

“Indeed.” Mr. Katz’s mustache quivered again. “If she is ever to be ready for marriage, it is important for her to be an educated and well-rounded young lady. Marriage, after all, is about more than compatible hearts, it must involve compatible minds as well, and a marriage between two people who cannot converse comfortably with each other will not have enduring happiness beyond the wedding.” He sighed. “Ah, what a fine institution… I am greatly looking forward to our prince’s marriage next month, I’m sure it will bring many blessings to him and to this country…”

“… I agree.” Edel cleared her throat. “Now then, which afternoon would be best for you, Mr. Katz? For Ahiru’s lessons, that is?”

“Ah, well…” He considered it for a moment. “Is Friday acceptable? I do not yet have any students coming by at that time… unless, of course, Miss Ahiru wishes to study with others?”

“N-no, that’s – that’s okay.” Ahiru shook her head. “I – I’d rather learn on my own… cause I’m just starting, and I’m sure I’d be way behind anyone you already tutor and I don’t want to look weird or silly cause I don’t know as much…”

“I’m sure you wouldn’t be made to feel bad, but of course, it is up to you to determine what you are comfortable with.” Mr. Katz stroked his mustache. “So, Friday afternoons? Perhaps beginning at one o clock, and lasting until three?”

“Y-yeah, that sounds good.” Ahiru nodded. “Is that okay with you?” She looked back and forth between Edel and Mr. Katz. “Both of you, that is?”

“Yes.” Mr. Katz scratched behind his ear. “It is perfect, so long as it suits the two of you.”

“It works for me as well.” Edel smoothed her skirt. “I will use the time to run errands and whatnot, and when you return home we will have dinner and discuss what you’ve learned, if you’re up to it.”

“O-okay!” Ahiru beamed. “ Then – then it’s on, definitely! I – I can’t wait!”

“I’m pleased to hear it.” Mr. Katz smiled. “It is always a happiness for me to see education prized by the young. By all, in fact, but I especially wish for the younger generation to maintain the joy of learning, as our world’s future lies in their – in _your_ hands, rather, I should say. I will look forward to seeing you every Friday, Miss Ahiru.” He coughed and cleared his throat. “Now then, there is the matter of payment to discuss – how much will it be for today’s delivery, Miss Edel? I recall that I asked for extras of some things in preparation for the dampening weather and the effects it will have upon my knee…”

Ahiru pretended to study the sitting room while Edel and Mr. Katz discussed the price of the items she had made and brought to him. A sort of atypical haggling started up between them: Mr. Katz seemed to want to pay Edel more generously than she thought appropriate given the work done, and they went back and forth for a bit as they negotiated something both parties were comfortable with. It was somewhat amusing to listen to at first, but soon lost its luster as she had no involvement in the conversation whatsoever. When the final price was agreed on at long last, Mr. Vogel was summoned back and instructed to bring the required amount from wherever Mr. Katz kept money for just these sorts of things. He nodded and disappeared from the room, returning a few minutes later with the requested money, which he counted out to Edel.

“Thank you, Mr. Katz.” Edel placed the money in her handbag and snapped it shut.

“No, no, thank _you_ , Miss Edel.” His eyes warmed with gratitude. “As I said before, your services have greatly improved the quality of my life. Paying you well is the very least I can do.”

“Once again, it is my pleasure.” She rose from her seat, and moved over to shake his hand. “We’ll leave you now, as I suspect we both have things that must get done… and please, don’t feel that you must walk us to the door if you are in pain,” she added.

Mr. Katz laughed. “You are most kind; indeed, my knee is giving me a bit of a twinge today, I think it’s a sign of some rain to come later on…”

“Whatever it is, take it easy and take care of yourself.” Edel patted his hands. “As always, send a message by my house if you need something.”

“Of course.” He nodded at her, and then turned his attention to Ahiru as she followed Edel over. “Thank you as well, Miss Ahiru, for your kind words and assistance with crafting these lovely medicines for me.” He shook her hand. “I will look forward to seeing you on Friday – once again, it was good to meet you.”

“Y-yes, it was good to meet you too!” Ahiru nodded. “I – I can’t wait to start reading a new book on Friday, thank you so much…”

“My pleasure.” He smiled.

Mr. Vogel showed them to the door, and after they’d been bid a good day they began heading back to Edel’s house. Ahiru glanced up at the sky as they walked; it was still blue, mostly, but from the south she could see darker, greyer clouds moving in. Maybe Mr. Katz was right, a storm very well could be on the way.

“It seems he’s correct in his guess that rain will be coming later,” Edel remarked as she too glanced up at the sky, seemingly reading Ahiru’s thoughts. “I’m not surprised… his injury tends to act up and give him more pain on rainy days. The autumn months can be very hard on him, the poor man.”

“How sad…” Ahiru frowned down at the cobblestone streets. “I – I feel bad for him… I could tell he misses dancing and wants to move around more, but he can’t…”

“Yes, you’re right.” Edel nodded. “He doesn’t speak of it much, but he did confide in me once that he misses his life on the stage. Still, he keeps himself occupied with his tutoring, and on good days he can go out into the town and do some things, so he isn’t confined to his house. Not that there is anything wrong with that, people cannot help their individual limitations, but it is something he enjoys and so he considers himself lucky in many ways.”

“I wonder if he knew my mother,” Ahiru mused. “Or heard of her. She – she used to dance ballet, so maybe… I could ask him about it sometime, if he doesn’t mind talking about that part of his life…”

“I think that would be fine.” Edel smiled. “If anything, the impression I’ve received from him is that he would be more than happy to discuss it with you, indeed, with anyone – it holds many fond memories for him. Sad too, perhaps, but it seems to have been one of the greatest joys of his life and he enjoys revisiting it with those who take an interest. The things he’s said to me indicate that he doesn’t wish to lose touch with that part of himself, despite his physical inability to continue on with it, and I also think he might have been hurt at least once by someone who displayed a complete _lack_ of interest in his passion for it.”

“Oh no, that’s really sad…” Ahiru’s face fell. “I – I’ve had people be like that to me before, it’s so mean…”

Edel gave her a sympathetic look. “I tend to agree.”

They chatted about various things off and on as they walked back, and when they got to the house they found someone waiting for them. A tall, slender girl with lightly tanned skin and short, curly brown hair stood near the front door, and her face lit up as she heard their footsteps. “Oh! Miss Edel! I’m glad you’re here!” She rushed up to them. “I have a couple letters for you today. And for you as well,” she added, turning to Ahiru. “You’re Ahiru Klein, correct? That’s who these are addressed to…”

“Yes, I am.” Ahiru nodded. “Did – did these go to the wrong house or something?”

“Oh no, you see, I’m the town courier!” She gave Edel her letters and held out the ones for Ahiru, and indicated the bag slung over her shoulder with her free hand. “I’m Hermia Senft, it’s nice to meet you – we’ll probably be seeing a lot of each other.”

“Nice to meet you too!” Ahiru took the letters from her, and examined them. She relaxed as she saw that they were from Pike and Lilie, and not Herr Drosselmeyer’s creditors wanting more money or something. She knew that wasn’t likely to happen, but it nevertheless was a relief to see entirely innocuous and friendly letters arrive.

“Thank you, Hermia.” Edel stuck the letters in her now-empty basket. “I hope my absence didn’t delay you too much?”

“Not at all, don’t worry.” Hermia shook her head. “I’d better be going now, though – bye!” She waved at them over her shoulder as she ran off.

“What an energetic girl,” Edel remarked as she unlocked the door. “Good for her line of work.” She glanced at Ahiru. “Letters from your friends?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “I – I’ll probably read them after dinner or something, before I go to bed.”

“I’m glad you’re keeping in touch.” Edel shut the door behind them and hung her cloak in the wardrobe. “Now, I think we have time for a little bit of herb preparation before lunch, and then we’ll do some gardening in the afternoon. Why don’t you go put your work robe back on, so you won’t spoil that pretty dress?”

“O-okay, I’ll go do that!” Ahiru nodded again, and hurried off to her room. She put her work robe on over her dress and left the letters from Pike and Lilie behind on her bed before scurrying back out to meet Edel in the workroom. They’d be taking down dried herbs and chopping and storing them, an simple enough task that could be easily set aside for lunch and resumed afterwards, unlike brewing a potion.

After getting some herbs stored and eating lunch they proceeded to the garden as Edel had mentioned. They trimmed and harvested some herbs and flowers, carefully pruning some of the bushes that needed it, and took everything they’d gotten from the garden back to the basement, where they set them to drying for later storage and use. The light was dying in the sky by the time they were done, and when their hands had been well-washed Edel set out a spread for dinner and lit the lamps.

Her stomach full and her body pleasantly tired from a day of work, Ahiru sank into her nightly bath and soaked away the lingering aches that the gardening had brought on. She washed her hair as well, and once it had been carefully dried and freshly braided she climbed into bed and opened up her letters from Pike and Lilie.

Pike’s was written in the same straightforward, no fuss way she always spoke, offering her wishes that the trip had been pleasant and that settling in was easy. She peppered it with plenty of asides about the things she’d heard about public transport and how that coach hadn’t seemed very comfortable and other things that made Ahiru sigh, but in general her letter was warm and caring in her own unique way, and she ended by imploring Ahiru to write back soon. Lilie’s, meanwhile, was mostly overwrought nonsense, but she gleaned a few facts from it, such as her appreciation for that suitor she’d met the night before Ahiru left. Pike had mentioned him in her letter too, stating that he wasn’t really her type at all, but then, she wasn’t the one who might be marrying him, was she? Ahiru only wished she could be so understanding about things and people that weren’t wealthy and expensive.

She didn’t have the energy to write letters in return by the time she was done, but she sleepily promised herself that she would do so tomorrow night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Katz: Derived from the German word _Katze_ "cat".  
>  Senft: Nickname for a helpful, kind person from the Middle High German _senfte_ meaning "soft, accommodating".  
>  Vogel: From Middle High German _vogel_ meaning "bird". (Mr. Vogel is meant to be the piano-playing penguin from the show.)


	7. Chapter 7

On Friday Ahiru attended her first tutoring session with Mr. Katz. He was kind enough to provide the book they’d be reading – something he said would be the norm for their lessons – and they read a couple of chapters and discussed them. At the end of the lesson he sent her home with the book and instructions to read a few more chapters and note down her thoughts and reactions on paper in between. They would discuss them at the following week’s session and then she would continue on until the book was finished, at which point they would move on to another. Provided Ahiru wished to keep being tutored, of course. She could at any point withdraw, Mr. Katz explained, and there would be no hard feelings, but Ahiru insisted she had a lot of interest in the subject and she really wanted to learn. He seemed satisfied with that answer and didn’t press the issue further, save for saying that if that ever changed she should tell him straight away. She promised him she would.

The next morning she rose early so she could pack her gifts for Fakir into a basket and leave the house as soon as possible, so as to reach the castle in time to catch him before the knights left with the prince on another hunt. Hunting parties tended to depart before mid-morning and it was a long walk to the castle, so she wanted to be sure she got there before that happened.

She laid the bread down in the basket first. It had been baked just last night, and the scent of the fragrant spices she’d mixed into the dough wafted up to her nose as she gently put it down. Beside it she set the small tins filled with the tea blends she’d made. Edel had helped her put them together days ago, and now that they’d had time to sit and let their flavors develop and meld they were ready for delivery and brewing. One was a black tea blend with some of the same spices in the bread, perfect for drinking in the morning, while the other was an herbal tisane intended for relaxing nighttime moments, perhaps alongside a good book. Something about imagining Fakir with a book just seemed _right_ ; maybe it was merely Edel having mentioned during his visit that he was fond of them that made her think so, but Ahiru doubted it. If it didn’t feel like a perfect fit the knowledge that he enjoyed them so would seem a strange and alien thing to imagine.

“I’ll walk you as far as the castle and then I have to make some deliveries,” Edel said as she slipped her cloak on. “Do you want to meet me somewhere or wait at the castle after you’re done?”

“I – I’ll just wait outside the castle, if that’s okay.” Ahiru swallowed. “I don’t really know where I’m going and I don’t want to make you have to look all over for me…”

“Oh, Ahiru, I wouldn’t mind, but if you’re scared of getting lost I don’t blame you.” Edel gave her a sidelong glance, as if to inquire if that was the reason.

“Um, a – a little.” She looked away, her cheeks turning a little red. “I mean, it sounds kind of fun to look around and see more of the town and everything, but it’s still scary to think about getting lost even though I know you can find me easily… and I don’t want to be a bother either…”

“It wouldn’t be a bother at all, but I understand being frightened of wandering alone in unfamiliar territory.” Edel waited for Ahiru to walk out the front door first, and then turned to lock it behind them once they’d both exited the house. “Now then, you have everything you wanted to give him?”

“Yes!” Ahiru nodded. “I – I got the bread, and the two teas are in here too…” She patted the cloth that lay on top of the items. “I hope he likes them…”

“He will, don’t worry.” Edel set off down the path, and Ahiru hurried to catch up. “Like I’ve told you, that’s his favorite bread, and I know for a fact that he enjoys both those tea blends as well.”

“I – I know you said that, but… what if I made them wrong?” Ahiru looked down at the ground. “What if I made them _bad?_ They might’ve turned out gross…”

“You didn’t, Ahiru,” Edel said gently. “I was with you the whole time to instruct you, remember? You did everything correctly. You trust me, right?”

“Y-yeah, of course I do!” Ahiru looked up at her with wide eyes. “I – I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to imply that I didn’t…”

“I didn’t take it that way so don’t worry.” Edel adjusted the basket on her arm. “Forgive me for alarming you. What I meant was that since you trust me, you should, in turn, trust yourself. Because if I have faith in your work and didn’t see you make any mistakes under my instruction, then that means you did well. Trust my judgment and trust yourself.”

“Oh.” Ahiru blinked a few times, and looked back down at her basket. “I – I didn’t think of it that way…”

“That’s quite all right.” Edel slowed her pace so she could kick a small rock out of her way; it landed at the foot of a tree just beyond the edge of the path. “It isn’t a thing that occurs easily to people, I don’t think – it’s easier to doubt yourself, and I’d never scold anyone for that. I simply wanted to open up to you an avenue for believing in yourself that might be of some comfort to you. Simply extend your trust in my judgment to trusting my assessments of you and your skills, and that may be the first step towards gaining some confidence in yourself on a permanent basis.”

“… That’d be nice.” Ahiru swallowed, her gaze falling to the ground under their feet. “I – I’ve never… nobody’s ever really been that encouraging of me to believe in myself. My friend Lilie would always encourage me to do badly at stuff cause she seemed to enjoy comforting me.” She frowned to herself at the memories; distanced from Lilie as she was now, the true nature of her friend’s behavior was only just occurring to her for the first time. “Although she really wasn’t that good at it… she seemed to just enjoy seeing me fail because it was more interesting or dramatic or something…”

Edel frowned too. “That doesn’t sound like a very good friend to me. In fact, that kind of behavior sounds downright cruel, as though she was taking pleasure in your setbacks because it provided her amusement. Forgive me if I’m overstepping my bounds, but those are not the actions of a true friend.”

“Y-yeah, um… I guess she wasn’t, now that I say it…” Ahiru’s shoulders slumped. “I – I never really thought about it before… I just always thought that that’s how she was and I accepted it and she wasn’t always terrible, she could be nice sometimes… I think… I mean…” Ahiru lifted a hand to fiddle with her necklace. “I – I do have some good memories…”

“That isn’t unusual.” Edel pursed her lips. “It speaks well for you that you are so accepting of people, but you don’t have to accept all sorts of treatment of yourself. You deserve to be treated well, _especially_ by your friends. What you have to decide now is whether or not those good memories outweigh the poor treatment, and what that means for continuing to communicate with her now that you’ve moved here away from her presence.”

“Yeah, I guess…” Ahiru looked back at the basket again. “I just… I feel like it’d be mean of me to just cut her off, and I don’t have any friends here yet, and what if I decide not to be friends with her anymore and that makes Pike not want to talk to me either? I mean, she was always trying to get Lilie to be nicer and stuff but she also didn’t really do anything to stop her most of the time and Pike…”

“… Pike what?” Edel asked after a few seconds of silence. “Was there something she did as well that bothered you, the way Lilie’s actions do?”

“Not really, I just…” Ahiru frowned again as some more old memories drifted into her mind. “She… she was more encouraging towards me than Lilie was, and she seemed to really want me to succeed at stuff… but she could be kind of, um… how do I say it… not always really nice about it? I mean, I understand what she meant and that she wasn’t trying to actually be mean or anything, but the things she’d say would make me feel bad sometimes, and sometimes she’d get annoyed at me for not being more confident and treat it like I was failing at something somehow to not be more confident and to say bad things about myself and she just… wasn’t very patient a lot of the time.” She sighed. “Does that make any sense?”

“Unfortunately, yes.” Edel sighed as well. “I have known the type before. They do mean well, yes, I don’t doubt that… but they also don’t recognize that the ‘tough love’ approach can do more harm than good for some people. Additionally, it is most unhelpful to chastise another person for their lack of good feelings towards themselves, it only makes them feel worse and withdraw from the person doing the chastising. It is a self-defeating method of ‘caring’ for another person and I am glad you are away from that as well. Perhaps you are better off being distanced from them, in the end… away from their influence you may end up a happier, healthier person after some time has passed.”

“Maybe.” Ahiru fiddled with her necklace some more. “But… I still don’t have any friends here yet, I’ve met nice people but I haven’t really made any friends I don’t think, and what if nobody wants to be my friend?”

“I wouldn’t worry about that.” Edel reached over and squeezed her shoulder. “A kind, sweet girl like you shouldn’t have any problem finding friends amongst good people. It may take you a little time since you’re new here, but you will eventually make friends that are, ideally, better suited for you than the ones you left behind in your hometown.”

Ahiru looked wistfully up at the sky. “I hope so…”

Their discussion then turned to the book Mr. Katz had given her as the first assignment, and to his tutoring style and how the lesson had gone, things Ahiru had been too tired to discuss the night before. It occupied them quite until they reached the castle gates, at which point they agreed upon a specific spot for Ahiru to wait for her at once her business in the palace was concluded. Only then did Edel bid her farewell, and they parted for the moment as Ahiru headed inside to deliver her tokens of gratitude to Fakir at long last. She had to have her basket inspected by the guards first to make sure she wasn’t a threat, but that didn’t take long and soon she found herself walking into the grandest place she had ever seen.

Ahiru supposed that possibly the royal residences in her home country outdid this castle. Maybe. But she’d never seen them, and the manors she _had_ seen back there were all outdone in her opinion by this masterpiece of white stone and spiraling towers, its tall glass windows sparkling in the pale autumn sunlight that pierced the clouds and worked to dissolve the lingering morning mist. Even at this relatively early hour the courtyard was crowded with people, courtiers and commoners alike, milling about or rushing past on whatever business they had there. Ahiru found herself shrinking slightly under the gazes of a particularly well-dressed pair of men who looked down their noses at her for a brief moment before returning to their conversation; what snatches of it she heard sounded like one complaining to the other about having to add a rooms to his mansion in order to fit his latest acquisitions in, and how he might eventually have to purchase another home if his art collection got any bigger. It seemed like rich people were the same no matter where you went.

Her awe at the grandeur of the palace soon wore off, however, as she realized that she had no idea where the knights’ quarters were or who she should ask for directions. Her heart sank and she wished she had something to hug as she looked frantically around, her excitement about finally delivering the gifts faltering in the face of this obstacle. She’d asked Edel last night if she knew where she should find Fakir when she got there, but she’d replied that she had only seen the parts of the castle relevant to the job she’d be doing for the royal wedding and only once at that, a disappointingly unhelpful answer. Who here was likely to know? And would she be bothering a servant if she stopped them to ask? A queasy feeling grew in the pit of her stomach.

“You look nervous.” A soft voice startled her, and Ahiru turned to see a pale, thin girl with short blue hair and glasses standing there, clutching what looked like a sketchbook in her arms. “Are you submitting your work too?”

“My work?” Ahiru’s nose crinkled in confusion. “No, I don’t think so… I mean… I’m here to give somebody a gift, I guess that’s not the same thing.”

“Not the same thing as me, no.” The girl laughed quietly, but there was nothing mean-spirited in it. “The princess-to-be is seeing some artists today in search of someone to commission for a royal portrait, and I assumed you were one of the other hopefuls.”

Ahiru shook her head. “N-no, I… I can’t draw at all.” She hung her head and sighed. “I used to try, but I’m just no good at it so I gave up…”

“Oh no, that’s…” The girl frowned. “Nobody’s good at first, you might actually have a gift for it that you just need to develop through practice. You should try again.”

“I don’t think so.” Ahiru shook her head again and sighed. “It’s too late now, I’m too old for it… if I ever had any talent it already withered away…”

“No, I don’t think that’s how it works.” She pursed her lips. “I mean, I can’t force you to take up something you’re not interested in, obviously, but I don’t want you to feel discouraged either. It’s never too late unless you’re dead.”

Ahiru’s mouth twitched into an almost-smile. “That’s a cheery thought.”

“It is, isn’t it?” The girl smiled wryly. “I’m being a bit rude, though, forgive me…” She held out her hand. “I’m Malen Blau. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Ahiru Klein.” She shook Malen’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you too. So, you’re… going to try and do a painting of the princess?”

“That’s what I’d like, yes.” Malen opened up what turned out to be a portfolio, rather than a mere sketchbook, and moved to Ahiru’s side to show her the drawings inside. “What do you think? Do you think they’re good enough to catch her eye?”

“Wow…” Ahiru stared admiringly down at the various pieces of artwork. Portraits, landscapes, and still lifes were all depicted with unerring attention to detail and careful, clean lines, capturing the essence of each subject. “They’re beautiful… I – I think she’d be silly not to ask you, you’re really really talented!”

“Oh, you’re too kind, Ahiru.” Malen blushed. “But thank you, I hope she does think highly of my work, as you do. I can’t help but think, though…” She sighed as she looked around the courtyard. “There are so many others who want the same job. And so many of them have much more experience than I do. It’s intimidating.” She looked down at the portrait of a dancing girl, and then swiftly closed the portfolio. “Maybe I should just go home…”

“Oh no! No, don’t do that!” Ahiru shook her head. “I mean, okay… like you said to me, I can’t force you to do anything, and if you’re really not comfortable I understand that, but… you should at least try, you know? You – you won’t know what she thinks of your art if she never sees it, and you shouldn’t think about how much experience the others have. Maybe their styles won’t be to her taste, and also maybe some of them don’t have as much experience as you think. Just concentrate on what makes your art uniquely yours, and believe in yourself, and even if you don’t get this you can keep trying hard and you’ll get something else. I believe in you! Cause you really are amazing at it.”

“That…” Malen’s lower lip trembled. “That might be the most encouraging thing anyone’s said to me about this…”

Ahiru frowned. “Oh no, was someone mean to you about it?”

“Not really… I mean… I guess…” Malen hesitated, and then sighed. “Some of my family members who know, they told me stuff about not getting my hopes up that I suppose was meant to be encouraging but really wasn’t, not the way they said it. And one person even questioned why I’m doing this, when I’m probably not ready for something so big.”

“That’s silly.” Ahiru scowled. “And not nice either, not at _all._ Only you can decide if you’re ready, and people should believe in you and your talent. And art is really subjective anyway, right?”

“To a certain degree, yes.” The wry smile appeared again for a moment. “But you _are_ right, it’s dependant not just on my abilities, but on the princess’ particular tastes. I don’t know what her tastes are yet, so I suppose in that respect it’s an even playing field.”

“Y-yeah, see?” Ahiru smiled brightly, to encourage her. “And even if she doesn’t choose you, it doesn’t mean you’re bad or anything, okay?”

“I’ll try not to think so if I lose out.” Malen gave her a small smile. “Thank you, Ahiru… you’ve made me feel a lot better. I’ll stay and try, and not go home until she’s seen my work.”

“Good!” Ahiru beamed, but then her expression faltered again. “Um, maybe this is a weird question, but… you wouldn’t happen to know where the knights’ quarters are, would you?”

“Can’t say I do.” Malen shook her head, a bemused look on her face. “This is my first time here too. At least, it sounds like it’s your first time here.”

“It – it is.” Ahiru nodded. “I – I just moved her recently from someplace else, and I’ve never been to the castle before, but I need to give one of the knights a present cause he helped me out when I came here, my coach was attacked by bandits and he saved my life and I need to find him before he goes hunting with the prince…” Her shoulders slumped again, and a strange urge to just lie down on the ground overwhelmed her for a moment.

“Oh, that’s…” Malen frowned, and then took Ahiru’s arm. “Come on, let’s find someone who knows, we’ll ask around and get good directions. I can walk with you there if you want, too.”

“Oh no, no, you don’t have to do any of that,” Ahiru protested, even as Malen led her along. “You have your own business here…”

“It’s fine, I got here way too early anyway, because I tend to get anxious about such things.” Malen scanned the crowd. “And it’s the least I can do after you bolstered my spirits – without your kindness I would surely have gone home and never tried.”

“I – I didn’t do anything…” Ahiru’s face felt hot. “I don’t deserve anything just for _that…_ ”

“We’ll have to agree to disagree about that, then. Ah!” Malen tugged on Ahiru’s arm as she quickened her pace, making a beeline for a middle-aged woman in a plain grey gown, carrying what looked like dirty linens. “She looks like she works here – we’ll ask her.”

“But I don’t want to bother her…” Ahiru said feebly as Malen pulled her along. Her words were lost in the noise of the crowd, however, and before she knew it she was standing awkwardly beside Malen as the other girl asked the woman where they could find the knights’ quarters. Instructions were given, Malen and Ahiru thanked her for her help, and then they were off.

It took them a few minutes to get there, during which Ahiru realized that she didn’t know which room would be Fakir’s and would have to ask someone if she didn’t immediately see him hanging about. The thought seemed to have occurred to Malen as well, and when they got there she asked a tall, dark-skinned knight with a friendly face where they might find Sir Fakir Grunewald. Ahiru almost giggled at the thought of calling Fakir “Sir Fakir” but mercifully was able to keep her laughter inside, sparing her from embarrassing herself in front of Malen and this kind and helpful man. He told them which door was Fakir’s, and then bid them goodbye and to have a lovely day.

“You’ll be all right from here, then?” Malen asked as he walked off.

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded, a blush spreading over her cheeks once more. “Th-thank you… I hope I didn’t keep you too long… sorry for all the trouble, you could’ve just let me go on my own…”

“Nonsense.” Malen shook her head. “As I said, it’s the least I can do. And I’m also far too early. _Still_.” She laughed, her own face turning pink. “This occupied only a little of the time I have left to wait before I must be in the waiting room, I think I’ll go explore the castle a little. Provided they’ll let me, of course.”

“O-okay.” Ahiru brightened. “Thank you again, and good luck! I hope she chooses you, I think you’ll be able to do her justice!”

“Thanks, I hope so.” Malen’s blush deepened. “I’ll see you around, then, Ahiru – with luck I’ll have good news the next time we meet.”

Ahiru watched her walk away, and then took a deep breath to calm her racing heart as she headed into the building that housed the knights. The tenth door on the left, the knight had said, with a long scratch down the middle. Can’t miss it, he’d told her. She hoped she wouldn’t. She adjusted the basket on her arm and carefully opened the huge door.

A few knights were milling about inside, talking to each other or on their way out or in. A couple spared her a curious glance, but none seemed much more interested in her than that. She caught snatches of conversation as she moved down the hall counting doors, all of it about the hunt that was to take place in a couple hours. Seemed they only had about a half hour left before they needed to muster in the courtyard and prepare for departure; Ahiru was grateful she’d gotten here when she did. She was just in time to give Fakir the gifts before he had to leave.

Ahiru took another deep breath as she stopped in front of the tenth door, hoping despite the presence of the unmistakable scratch that she hadn’t somehow misunderstood which side was meant to be the left side, and then tentatively knocked. She almost immediately heard footsteps moving in her direction, and a few seconds later the door opened and Fakir looked down at her. His eyebrows drew together in an expression of confused curiosity. “Ahiru?”

“Hi!” Relief flooded her expression and she beamed up at him. “I – I’m sorry, I hope I’m not disturbing you, but, but it’s just that your present is ready so I brought it here before you have to go.” She held up the basket.

“… Oh.” His expression relaxed. “No, you’re… not bothering me.” They stared at each other for a moment, and then he cleared his throat, looking awkward. “Ah… would you… do you want to come in?”

“Oh! I, um…” Ahiru felt her cheeks heat up. “S-sure… if it’s okay…”

“I wouldn’t have asked if it wasn’t.” Fakir stepped back to allow her in, and then followed her as she passed him, leaving the door open. “Here. Just set it on the table.” He directed her to the small, square table that rested just off the center of the small room. Not much else was in there beyond the table: only a narrow bed, a tall wardrobe, a plain washing-up table, and a small shelf crammed with books. Ahiru found herself idly wondering where he did his bathing, and then pushed the thought out of her mind as her face flamed anew.

“Okay.” She set the basket down on the worn, scratched-up old table and took the cloth off. “I – I hope this is all right, you said food is okay to have in here, right?”

“It is.” Fakir moved to her side, and Ahiru felt a fresh warmth shimmer through her. “You said you were going to make bread?”

“Yup!” Ahiru lifted the loaf out of the basket and presented it to him. She tried to smile, even as butterflies flitted through her stomach. “Edel said it’s your favorite bread, I hope it came out good enough…”

He took it from her, and she felt a slight shiver at the brush of his fingers against her hands. He hadn’t yet put on his dark gloves, so she felt the full warmth of his smooth skin on hers for a brief moment. “It… smells good.” His expression relaxed further as he breathed in the scent of the gently spiced bread, into something that looked faintly nostalgic and almost _happy_ , even. “I… thanks. I’m sure this will taste great.”

“I! I hope so!” The urge to bounce up and down on the balls of her feet was narrowly suppressed. She’d never baked before, so it was gratifying to have even this small compliment before the results were sampled. “A-and there’s more, too, the reason I had to wait a few days…” She took the tins out and set them on the table beside the basket. “Edel showed me how, and we made teas she said you like… one for in the morning and another for at night.”

“Hmmm?” Fakir put the bread aside and picked up one of the tins. A lift of the lid revealed the black tea blend, and he sniffed it before closing the tin back up and opening the other. An herbal blend of chamomile, lavender, rose hips, and mint – among other things – sat inside, and Ahiru noticed that he took an even deeper sniff of this one before replacing the lid. “Thank you… these will be very good, I think.”

He smiled then, just a small and slight one, but it was enough to make Ahiru’s heart thump and her face heat up even more than before. Fakir was handsome enough when he was serious, but this smile transformed him, made him look even better than he normally did, which was saying something. “I – I’m glad, I… you – you’re welcome, I hope they’re good, I really did want to make something nice for you after you saved my life, I know you didn’t want me to at first but I wasn’t going to not put in the effort, I felt like you deserved it even though you were rude about it, I mean…” Her cheeks feeling like they were on fire, she dropped her gaze to the floor. “I – I’m sorry… I didn’t mean…”

“No, it’s… it’s fine.” She hesitantly glanced up, and saw that his smile was gone, but he didn’t look angry, which made her relax slightly. He looked awkward again, and… contrite? His expression was hard to read. “You’re right, I _was_ rude.” He looked away, and his cheeks seemed to get a little pink. “I’m… sorry about that.”

“No, no, it’s all right.” Ahiru shook her head, and took a step towards him. “I – I understand, cause you explained it to me better the other day… I didn’t mean to bring it up again, I was just babbling and I say stupid things sometimes cause my mouth gets away from me and my brain takes a while to catch up, and…” She sighed and looked down at the floor again. “I – I’m stupid and weird, I know…”

“… No, you’re not.” Ahiru’s gaze flew back up once more, her eyes wide, but Fakir still wasn’t looking at her, and his face seemed to get a little bit redder as he continued. “You’re a… a kind person who means well. If you put your foot in your mouth sometimes, that’s okay. Everyone does.” He finally looked at her, and gave her a sort of wry, self-deprecating half-smile. “You know already that I do too.”

“Th-that’s true!” Ahiru relaxed enough to let out a little giggle.

“You don’t have to agree so quickly.” He scowled at her, and she would’ve shrunk back if she hadn’t seen the spark of amusement in his eyes; instead, she giggled again, and had the pleasure of seeing his face relax into another small smile. It left her breathless and filled with wonder. Had he… really made a _joke?_ He was capable of that? Incredible.

“A-anyway, I’m glad I caught you before you have to go,” Ahiru said, trying to ignore how flustered she felt. “I – I know you have to go soon, for the hunt, so I don’t want to keep you…”

His smile disappeared, and she thought she saw something akin to disappointment flicker in his eyes for just a moment. It was hard to tell. “Yes, I do… you chose the right time to come by, as I likely would’ve been too busy with the feast later to receive any guests.”

“Oh, that’s what you do after a hunt?” Ahiru picked up the cloth and folded it as neatly as she could before putting it back in the basket. “You have a big feast? Sorry if that’s a stupid question, I’ve never been on one or heard much about them before… it’s not something people do while in the city and I never got to visit the country before I came here…”

“Yeah.” Fakir nodded. “We bring back the spoils, and the castle chefs prepare and cook it. We spend the rest of the evening feasting and telling stories, late into the night.”

“Oh, that sounds fun!” Ahiru smiled. “I hope you have a good time!”

“I… thanks.” Fakir shrugged. “To be honest, I’m not overly fond of parties, but I can’t really get out of it, so…” He brushed some hair out of his eyes. “I put up with it.”

“Awww, that’s too bad. I bet you’re good at telling stories, though!” Ahiru lifted the basket and slipped it onto her arm. “Cause Edel said you like books and stuff a lot, right? And I see you’ve got a bunch of them over there, n-not that I was inspecting your room or anything…”

“There’s not much to see anyway.” He shrugged again. “And… I suppose I’m all right. Nothing special.” He moved over to his wardrobe, and took out his black gloves, slipping them onto his hands. “In any case, you’re right, I have to be going – I have to meet with my liege to finish a few preparations before we ride out.” He turned back to her, his face carefully neutral. “Thank you again for the gifts – do you need me to walk you out?”

“O-oh, no, n-no thank you, I – I’ll be fine.” Ahiru shook her head, the butterflies having reappeared in her stomach. “Thank you anyway, though, I – I appreciate it.”

“It’s nothing.” Fakir gestured to the open doorway. “After you, then?”

“O-oh, right, s-sorry…” Ahiru hurried out through the doorway, Fakir following close behind. He closed and locked his door, and then they both started walking back down the now-empty hallway. Ahiru paused for a moment as they exited, and looked back at Fakir. “Bye, Fakir… I hope you enjoy the –”

“Ah, Fakir.” A smooth, almost musical female voice interrupted Ahiru before she could finish her sentence. “I’m glad I caught you before you left. Do you have a moment?”

“… My lady.” Fakir bowed stiffly, and Ahiru caught a flash of something indecipherable in his eyes. Whatever it was, he didn’t seem at all happy to see this woman. “I’m afraid not. I must go speak with Siegfried before we leave on the hunt. And don’t you have appointments of your own to keep? The business with the portrait commissioning?”

“Oh, now, there’s still a bit of time before I must begin receiving them.” She was a little bit taller than Ahiru, and looked slightly older, with wavy dark hair pinned up around her pale and lovely face, and she wore an expensive-looking gown of cranberry silk that accentuated her shapely figure perfectly. “And surely you can spare a moment to speak with me before you go? Siegfried doesn’t need you _that_ badly, not just yet.”

“You underestimate how much planning is required for a hunt to proceed smoothly.” His expression was just as stiff as his posture, as though he was trying to rein something in and not quite succeeding. “If you’ll excuse me…” His eyes flickered back to Ahiru. “Good day.”

He stalked off before the well-dressed woman could protest, and her expression darkened for a moment before she assumed a more pleasant one and turned to Ahiru. “What a shame, I suppose I should have stopped by sooner… ah well. May I assume you are a friend of Fakir’s?”

“I…” Ahiru swallowed, not sure what to feel as she stared up into the young woman’s remarkable eyes. They were a rich, deep brown, which was lovely in its own right, but there also seemed to be a hint of red in them, making them something of an auburn color. Ahiru had never seen anything like it before, and it made her seem even more breathtakingly beautiful. “Not really, I mean… we – we’re not enemies or anything, I don’t want to make it sound like that, but I wouldn’t really say friends either, not yet, more like…” She struggled to find the right word as she continued to stare at the pretty woman. “Acquaintances…”

“I see.” She regarded Ahiru with an expression she couldn’t read. “If you do not object to my curiosity, I would like to inquire as to how you two met…? You are well enough acquainted for you to be paying him a visit at his home, and I was not aware that he had any friends outside the castle that would do such a thing…”

“Oh, um, I…” Ahiru felt herself blushing, though she didn’t know why. “W-well, for one thing, I live with his aunt, cause I’m her new apprentice… I just moved here…”

“Oh, Lady Edel?” Her face relaxed into a warm smile that took Ahiru’s breath away for a moment. “Yes, I know her – such a talented and amiable witch, she seems to serve this community well. More amiable by far than her nephew, though yes, I realize that that is not saying much.” Her expression briefly darkened again, but then it cleared and she smiled politely at Ahiru. “I too am new to this country… how are you finding it?”

“I – I really like it.” Ahiru fidgeted slightly, her hand moving up to fiddle with her necklace. “It’s so lovely, and everyone’s so nice…”

“Yes, I agree.” Her smile widened. “Most everyone I’ve met has been very welcoming to me in the few months I’ve been here, and it is greatly heartening. Being so far from home has been…” Something flickered in her eyes for a moment. “A bit… well, strange and unfamiliar, and there has been much to adjust to. However, the kindness I have received from so many around me has been a great boon. I hope you are adjusting well yourself.”

“I – I am.” Ahiru nodded. “What brought you here? Um, if – if I can ask, if it’s too personal and you don’t want to answer you don’t have to, I don’t want to be rude, sorry…”

“It’s not rude at all. Though I’m surprised you haven’t guessed.” She laughed. “I am none other than Princess Rue – or, I _will_ be the princess, in a little over a month’s time.” She extended one of her slender, pale hands. “Forgive my rudeness in not introducing myself sooner. Your name is…?”

“O-oh!” Ahiru’s eyes went wide, and she let go of her necklace and shook Rue’s hand, her own hand trembling a little from nerves. “I – it’s lovely to meet you, I mean, it’s an honor, it really is… a-and my name is Ahiru, sorry, Ahiru Klein…”

“It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Ahiru.” Rue smiled. “Now, if I may return to something from a moment or two ago… you said that you live with Fakir’s aunt ‘for one thing’, as a way of explaining your acquaintance with him. Forgive any overstepping of bounds on my part, but that phrasing caught my attention. Is there some other cord that binds you two together, or am I mistaken?”

“Um, well… I guess you could put it that way.” Ahiru’s hand returned to her necklace again, almost unconsciously. “I – I actually met Fakir the first day I came here, sorta… the coach I rode on was attacked by bandits, and he and the other knights saved me, and he saved me personally, so…” She held up the basket. “Th-that’s why I came here today, to bring him a gift as thanks, that’s really the extent of how we know each other…”

“Ah, yes, I think I do remember hearing something about that.” Rue tucked a loose curl behind her ear. “Siegfried – that is, Prince Siegfried to you – was most unhappy about such a thing befalling visitors to this land.” She sighed. “I find I cannot blame him. It gives quite the wrong impression. I hope it will set your mind at ease that he has done much to increase the security at the borders, in the event that you must travel again, whether to return to your former home or simply for leisure.”

“D-don’t worry about that, I… o-oh, oh no, I’m sorry, should I be calling you ‘Your Majesty’? Or ‘Your Highness’?” Ahiru swallowed. “I – I don’t want to be rude, I’m so sorry…”

“’Lady Rue’ will be just fine.” She laughed softly. “Set your mind at ease. I…” She trailed off, her expression changing, and she shook her head. “I am sorry, but as pleasant as it has been to converse with you, I must be returning inside – I am shortly to be receiving artists who have portfolios to show me, for it is tradition to have my portrait painted, apparently.” She looked rather bemused for a moment. “Good day to you, Ahiru – and do give my regards to Edel, will you not?”

“Of – of course!” Ahiru curtsied, and nearly knocked herself in the head with her basket as she did. “G-good day to you too, Lady Rue – it was really nice to meet you!” _And please choose Malen,_ she added to herself silently.

Rue nodded and smiled, and then turned and walked back towards the castle. Ahiru watched her for a moment and then started walking in the opposite direction. Some of the tension in her shoulders dissolved as she headed back to where she would wait for Edel, and she found herself almost surprised by how much of a relief it was to be done with this place. What a nerve-wracking morning; she was glad she had the rest of the day off to do whatever she wanted. After all that had happened she had it in mind to spend her free time relaxing and writing letters and reading for fun instead of studying. It would do much to calm her nerves, and she wished she knew the town better so that she could simply walk home right now by herself and get started on soothing herself.

Fortunately, she didn’t have to wait very long for Edel to return to their meeting place, and a couple of deliveries later – with conversation in between about her castle encounters that left her feeling quite wound up again just _talking_ about it all – she was back home and mercifully free of further obligations for the day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blau: Means "blue" in German, most likely used to refer to a person who wore blue clothes.


	8. Chapter 8

Ahiru peered around the open study door. “Edel?”

 “Yes?” She looked up. “What is it, Ahiru?”

“I – I’m going now. Do you need me to do anything before I go, or to get something on my way back?”

“I don’t think so.” She shook her head. “Thank you for asking, though. Oh, but – do please give Mr. Katz my best, won’t you?”

“Of course!” Ahiru nodded. “I – I’ll see you later then! Bye!” She waved, and Edel smiled back at her before returning to whatever she was writing. The lamp on the desk flickered a little, as though a wind had disturbed it, and Ahiru shivered.

She returned to her room to put on an overcoat, and then hurried to the hall to slip her cloak over her clothes as well. Her book and notes she tucked into the coat, making it look like she’d padded her chemise in a most awkward and unbecoming way. The thought made her laugh a little and remember how Pike had tried to get her to wear _actual_ padding under hers “just to enhance your figure a bit and give you some confidence, and maybe you can snare some rich bachelor that way too”. The discomfort of the padding and the unnatural look of it had been anything but confidence-boosting, though, and she hadn’t been quite at ease with the idea of it to begin with. It felt like lying. Her body wasn’t considered fashionable or attractive by the standards of… well, _anyone_ she’d met, but it was hers, and she’d learned to accept it. And besides, if she’d had a fuller figure she wouldn’t have been able to fit into her mother’s old ballet costumes and pretend to dance like she had. Not that she _could_ do that anymore now that they’d been auctioned off after Herr Drosselmeyer’s death, but still.

No point in dwelling on _that_ loss, though. Ahiru shook off the memories and drew the hood of her cloak up, and then cautiously inched her way out the door. Whatever natural forces controlled the weather had seen fit to welcome in the new month with a downpour; she couldn’t wait to get to Mr. Katz’ house and settle down beside his cozy fireplace as they discussed the latest chapters in the book he’d assigned her. It was tempting to just stay home beside _Edel’s_ fireplace, but standing up Mr. Katz would be unforgivably rude in her opinion, and so it wasn’t considered an option.

She pulled the cloak closer around herself as she walked, shivering a little as a slight breeze sent a chill through both cloak and coat, seemingly all the way through to her skin. She’d dressed as warmly as she possibly could, but the temperature seemed to have dropped several degrees overnight as the calendar changed from September to October. Which meant that she’d been here just under a month, hard as it was to believe at times. Autumn was definitely well underway now, and in a more pronounced fashion than it had been when she’d arrived. It had just begun when she’d left her old home – for in their part of the world it seemed to start at the end of August, weeks ahead of when it was supposed to “officially” get going – and was moving into the harsher portion of itself already. A month into both a new season and her new life… it felt like barely any time had passed at all.

She knew it had, though. A month of new routines, of learning, of lessons and brewing and market trips and deliveries and rituals – her head was still in a bit of a whirl at some of it, but other things she’d easily settled into by now. They visited the central market once per week to purchase household items, and spent most days learning and brewing ointments and potions and tinctures and various other things besides, with time taken as well to tend the garden and prepare the herbs. She’d gone on a few more trips into the forest now too, and was slowly growing more at ease with it, as long as they stayed well within the boundaries. Edel took her on most deliveries, and she’d even had the chance to observe and help with – a little bit, for it was not something she’d be learning extensively just yet – protective rites at the home of a couple who had just had their first child. It was important, Edel told her, to do such rites every time a new child was born in Goldkrone, but firstborn children were considered to be the most at risk for being replaced with a changeling. Whether that was a true habit of the fairies or merely a curious superstition originating from some obscure tale wasn’t clear, but all the same it had taken hold firmly in the minds of the citizenry. And so extra protections were laid upon all firstborn children, as well as those whose birth was of significant numbering amongst their siblings (such as a third or seventh child).

Ahiru made herself walk slowly and carefully to avoid slipping on the wet stones, and thus took a little longer than she normally did to reach Mr. Katz’ house. She braced herself before slipping her hand out of her cloak and knocking on the door, thankful that she’d remembered her new gloves. Edel had bought them for her last week in preparation for the coming chill in the weather; they were lovely and warm and had a charm sewn into them to help repel water. Even so, she hated to pull her hand out from where it had had additional warmth, and she fidgeted a little as she waited in the wake of her knock, hoping it had been loud enough.

A minute or so later, Mr. Vogel opened the door. “Ah. Miss Klein.” He adjusted his spectacles. “I’m sorry, but Mr. Katz is rather indisposed at the moment and cannot hold your lesson today. He wishes for me to convey his apologies to you.”

“I-indisposed?” Ahiru’s eyes widened. “Oh no… he’s not sick, is he?”

“No.” He shook his head. “It is his injury – the wet weather has left him unable to leave his bed. He is very sorry.”

“Oh no, no, he doesn’t need to apologize for that!” Ahiru shook her head. “Um, tell him I hope he feels better soon, and that it’s okay, I understand… oh, and that Edel sends her best, too!”

“… I shall.” He nodded. “Good day to you, Miss Klein – unless you need something before you go?”

“N-no, I’m fine.” Ahiru smiled. “Th-thank you, though… a-and you have a good day too!”

“… Thank you.” He nodded again, and closed the door.

That was that, then. Ahiru let out a sigh. She should’ve expected it, perhaps; she knew already that damp air tended to give poor Mr. Katz more pain than usual, of course a rainy day such as this was likely to be even worse. Still, she hadn’t wanted to take the chance of him sitting up in his study waiting and waiting for her in vain… that had just been too sad an idea. Braving the rain and chill only to be turned away seemed preferable to the possibility of him having gotten up out of bed and trying to power through the pain for the sake of someone who didn’t show up. She’d go ahead and walk home, and curl up by the fire with a good book and some tea – maybe after treating herself to a lovely scented bath to warm up – and they’d meet next week, provided the weather and his knee cooperated. She only minded because she felt sad for him hurting like that.

She got so wrapped up in thinking about it all that she didn’t pay close enough attention to where she was going, and before she knew it Ahiru found herself on an unfamiliar street, blinking rain out of her eyes as a stronger wind sent it pelting into her face. By some stroke of ill luck the sign that was _supposed_ to tell her where she was had just been painted that morning before the rain started, and now the fresh paint ran down over the pole and into the gutter in thin rivulets of blue and white. _Wonderful_. She sighed, and cupped a hand over her eyes in an attempt to block out more water from getting in them as she turned round and round in search of a familiar landmark or a street sign that _hadn’t_ just been redone.

From what she could tell, however, she had never been to this part of town at all, or if she had she hadn’t paid enough attention to remember anything. Nowhere in her surroundings could she spot anything she recalled seeing before, and the street name on the sign that needed repainting but thankfully hadn’t been got to yet was wholly unfamiliar as well. Her heart sank – which direction should she go in? Would she get even more hopelessly lost if she tried the wrong way? Which way was right? Everything was so confusing, and she just wanted to get _home_. Oh, she could kick herself for being so careless and feather-brained as to get lost!

“Ahiru?”

She jumped at the voice, but relaxed when she turned round and saw who’d spoken. “Oh! Fakir…” She blinked up at him, and wiped more rain out of her eyes. “H-hi…”

“Hello.” He frowned. “What’s wrong?”

“Eh?” Ahiru tilted her head. “What do you mean?”

He gestured to her hand. Or maybe her face? It was hard to tell. “You… are you crying?”

“What? Oh!” Ahiru giggled despite herself. “No, no, don’t worry! I just got some rain in my eyes, the wind keeps blowing it there, ahahaha…”

“I see.” His frown didn’t budge. “What are you doing out here alone, though? Is Edel ill, and she sent you alone to get something?”

“Huh? No…” Ahiru shook her head. “Edel’s fine, she’s at home… well, I’m not sure what she’s doing right now but when I left she was in the study writing something down, I didn’t ask what and she didn’t tell me…”

“… Oh.” He relaxed slightly, but then his brow knit in confusion. “What _are_ you doing, then? It’s not a good day for a walk.”

“Oh, I, um…” Ahiru felt herself blush and she adjusted the items under her coat, fixing where they’d gotten dislodged when Fakir startled her. “I get tutoring on literature every Friday afternoon and that’s where I’m going, I mean, it’s where I _was_ going, I mean… I went there but my teacher had to cancel cause he has a hurt knee and it acts up when the weather’s really wet so I was going home but…” Her shoulders sagged. “I wasn’t watching where I was going and I got lost… I don’t know this town that well yet…”

“Idiot. You should pay attention if you don’t really know where you’re going.” He let out an annoyed sigh.

“I – I know…” Ahiru’s shoulders slumped further, and her gaze dropped to Fakir’s feet. “I really am stupid… I was thinking about what I’d do at home and about poor Mr. Katz and how I hope he’ll be okay tomorrow, not so I can get the lesson but for his own sake and I just…” She blinked rapidly as her eyes pricked with real tears, and hoped that he’d mistake it for more rain in the reverse of his error from a couple minutes ago.

“…I… just… just be more careful next time.” He spoke in a softer tone, and after a moment’s awkward pause lightly touched her shoulder, making her look up with wide eyes at his unreadable expression. “Come on. I’ll walk you back so you don’t get even more lost.”

“Eh? What?” Ahiru’s cheeks heated up afresh. “N-no, that’s okay… just, just tell me where to go and I’ll follow your directions, I swear I’ll pay attention and remember and I won’t get distracted this time, I don’t want you to go out of your way just for _me…_ ”

“I’m not.” He shook his head. “I’m going that way anyway, so we might as well walk together.”

“You are?” Ahiru wiped at her eyes, trying to dash away both rain and unshed tears. “You’re visiting Edel again today?”

“No, I’m going to my father’s house. It’s just up the road from Edel’s, you’ll have passed it on your way here… it’s close enough that you’ll easily be able to get home on your own from there.” Fakir shrugged. “Really, it’s no detour for me.”

“Oh… o-okay then, that’s fine.” She swallowed. “Th-thank you so much...”

“I told you, it’s no big deal.” His cheeks seemed to go a little pink, but he turned away too quickly for her to tell. She quickened her pace slightly to keep up with him as she followed him down the street, not wanting to lose sight of him; it wasn’t crowded out, not on such a day, but she still wanted to stay close to him just in case. And maybe it was her imagination, but he soon seemed to adjust _his_ pace to better suit her, allowing for the fact that she had much shorter legs than he did. Either way they walked in silence for a few minutes before he spoke again just as they turned a corner. “So, you… get literature tutoring?”

“Ah? Oh… yeah…” Ahiru zig-zagged a little to avoid stepping in a couple of puddles. “There’s this really nice man, Mr. Katz, he used to be a ballet dancer but he hurt his knee and so now he lives here and Edel makes medicines and special teas and things for him and when we went to deliver stuff he told me about how he tutors people in literature cause he learned about a bunch of different subjects when he was growing up and he does it for free so Edel said I could have every Friday afternoon off to go to class with him…”

“I see.” Fakir paused, and then turned right at the next intersection. “Do you enjoy the lessons?”

“Yes!” Ahiru nodded eagerly, sending some water flying from the hood of her cloak. “He gives me the books I need – well, we’re still on the first book, really – and we read the first couple chapters and talked about them, and then I read a few chapters every week and write down all my thoughts and reactions and we discuss them in class.” She gnawed on her lower lip. “Sometimes it’s hard to think of things to say and I don’t really understand at first what the author must have meant, but then I think of stuff as I’m writing and when we talk I feel like I understand it better…”

“I know what you mean.” He wiped some water off his own face. “Some books… it feels like the author was trying to be as obscure as possible. And I can appreciate being allowed to form my own conclusions and interpretations, don’t get me wrong, but when you don’t give the reader enough hints to go off to even _begin_ coming up with interpretations, you’ve failed as a writer in my opinion.”

“Yeah, I’ve read some stories like that, I –” Ahiru’s train of thought found itself derailed as a horse-drawn cart rushed past them; its wheels had the unfortunate luck of going right through a rather large and deep puddle, and it would have soaked Ahiru through if Fakir hadn’t moved correctly and in time to shield her from the deluge. “Oh! Oh no!” Her face fell with worry. “A-are you okay? You’re not too wet, are you? You didn’t have to do that…”

“I’m fine.” Fakir shook his head, spraying her a little with some water that flew from his hair – it had gotten hit with some of the splash before he’d turned his back. “The cloaks we’re issued are better at absorbing water, because there’s a charm worked into them.” He held out a sodden corner for her to see, and in the flickering lamplight she could just barely see the sigil sewn into the fabric. “I’m not really that wet.”

“O-okay, a-and thank you, but…” Ahiru frowned again. “We – we should hurry back, so you can get dried off and sit in front of a fire and warm up…”

“… That does sound good,” he admitted. “Fine. Let’s get going, then.”

“That’s what _I_ said,” she reminded him in a playfully petulant tone, and he rewarded her with a quiet, deep laugh that made her feel as though she’d already downed some hot tea. They didn’t talk for about half a minute after that, not till she remembered what they’d been discussing before getting interrupted. “Oh! Um… I was wondering… what kind of stories do you like best?”

“I… hmmm.” Fakir frowned, though it was of a lost in thought kind of frown rather than his usual grumpy scowl. “It’s hard to say. I’ve read all sorts, and I’ve had less time in recent years to sit and read a book for pleasure… half the books on that shelf in my room I haven’t even been able to _start_.” He sighed. “I suppose… well, when I was a kid I always liked adventure stories best. I was one of those children who liked to imagine themselves going on quests and slaying monsters.” His face turned a little red. “I know that sounds stupid, but…”

“Oh no, not at all!” Ahiru shook her head. “Not to me, anyway… I used to have fun imagining that kind of stuff too. Not really killing things, but being able to explore places and meet all kinds of fantastical creatures and stuff like that… and I never wanted the stories to end because I liked the characters so much. Sometimes… sometimes I’d not even want to read the rest of the book because I was so sad about it ending… but I always did anyway, and then I’d cry and start it over again.” She looked away, blushing. “I bet _that_ sounds really silly…”

“Not at all.” His voice had softened a little again. “I don’t think anyone really wants to see their favorite story end… and it’s only natural to be sad when it does. I think… if a story makes you feel that way about the world and especially the characters, then that means the writer did a really good job. I’ve had books too where I didn’t want to see it end because I’d grown so attached to the characters.”

“You too?” Ahiru looked up at him, and he nodded. “Oh… that makes me feel better…” She smiled. “I’m glad I’m not the only one, I’m glad you feel that way too…”

“And I doubt I’m the only other one.” Fakir brushed some wet hair out of his eyes again. “Like I said, no one wants to see their favorite stories end.” His expression changed again, to another frown. “And sometimes I was… sometimes I didn’t want to see it end because I couldn’t see a happy ending on the horizon, and sometimes I was right. I hated those books.” His scowl deepened. “Some writers think tragedy is automatically better and more interesting and realistic than a happy ending, and never let their characters get anywhere or do anything that matters. Those are my least favorite types of stories.”

“Y-yeah, mine too…” Ahiru ducked to avoid a low-hanging branch. “I just get… it’s kind of depressing to read a story where it’s always bad things happening and there’s no hope of anything good coming out of it and everyone’s miserable the whole way through, including you, not _you_ you but you in general, the reader… anyway, that’s not fun for me to read at all. I don’t like that kind of book.”

“Neither do I.” He fell silent then, and after a minute Ahiru thought she sensed him staring at her, but when she looked over he was focused on their route, his eyes on the road. “What book is Mr. Katz having you read first?”

“Hmmm? Oh… it’s called Ghosts of Yesterday, and it’s about this girl who’s trying to recover some missing memories before it’s too late, and there’s magic and fairies involved too… it’s really good.” Ahiru adjusted her book and notes again, and noticed that they were back on the main street through town. She could see familiar surroundings that she recognized from her walks to market with Edel, and it relaxed her. _Now_ she knew where they were going. “Have you ever read it?”

“No.” He moved closer to her to avoid bumping into someone hurrying past them, and her heart fluttered as he brushed against her. “I think I have it on my shelf, though… the title sounds familiar.”

“Really?” Ahiru brightened. “You should read it! I think you’d like it!”

“I will, then. Eventually.” Fakir shrugged. “I think it was a Yule gift a couple years ago, I’ve been meaning to get to it and the other unread ones… it’s only a matter of finding the time, as I said before.” He paused, and glanced over at her. “I’ll… read that one first when I get the chance.” He seemed to turn a little pink again. “Thanks… for the recommendation.”

“Of course!” Ahiru beamed up at him. “I hope you like it! I’m almost done with it, I’ll let you know if it has a good ending. I mean, I won’t spoil anything for you, but I’ll tell you if it’s worth getting to the end, you know?”

“Yeah, I knew what you meant.” He nodded. “Thanks.”

Ahiru blushed. “Y-you’re welcome!”

They walked along in comfortable silence for a while after that; the path soon led them out of the main part of Goldkrone and into the outskirts where fewer people lived, the distance between homes growing larger and the edge of the woods beginning to encroach more and more. Ahiru found herself thankful for the cover of the trees as they went on, for it afforded them some small bit of shielding from the ongoing downpour. It showed no signs of letting up any time soon, and she yearned to be home and warm beside a fire with a cup of hot tea in her hands.

As they neared the end of the path Ahiru saw smoke drifting up over the tops of trees and light peering through branches; round a slight bend in the road sat a small, cozy-looking house of brick and stone that she remembered going past whenever she went into town. In fact, it was the first house she and Edel passed by whenever they stepped out, and home was only a very short walk away now. Edel had never pointed it out as being where Fakir’s father lived, but then, she’d always been distracted by one thing or another on their trips into Goldkrone.

Fakir halted in front of it, only a few feet away from the front door. “This is it. My father’s home, that is.” He looked down at her. “Will you be fine on your own from here, or should I –”

“Fakir.” The door opened, and a middle-aged man with light skin and sandy brown hair that had just begun to grey at the temples smiled out at them. “Don’t just stand there in the rain getting – oh, you brought a friend?”

“I – she’s…” Fakir went red. “I didn’t _bring_ her here, she’s… she’s on her way –”

“Tell me about it inside.” The man beckoned at them. “Come in, you two, don’t catch a chill out there.”

“M-me too?” Ahiru felt her face heating up, and she knew it was probably matching the shade Fakir’s cheeks had taken on. “But – but I… you don’t even know me…”

“That’s what tea and conversation are for.” He laughed. “And any friend Fakir’s made is someone I’d like to meet, anyway. Unless you’re busy?”

“I…” Ahiru hesitated. “W-well, no, I’m not, b-but I don’t want to impose…”

“It’s no imposition, really.” He shook his head. “I’m not going to try and force you if you don’t want to, though.”

“Oh no! No, it’s not that!” Ahiru shook her head. “If – if it’s really okay, that – that sounds nice, I’d like to…” She didn’t dare glance at Fakir – what if he didn’t want her here? The thought made her stomach churn with discomfort.

“Then let’s not waste any more time.” The man stepped back, and held the door open for them. “Come on, you two – get indoors and out of the rain. You may be young, but that won’t protect you from a cold.”

“I know _that_.” Ahiru risked a glance at Fakir as he said it – he looked annoyed, but she couldn’t tell if it was with his father for making such a comment, or if it encompassed the situation as a whole. He strode ahead of her, and she hurried to catch up.

Fakir’s father took their cloaks once they were inside, and then turned to Ahiru and extended his hand. “Hello. I’m Charon Schmidt.”

“I – I’m Ahiru Klein.” She shook his hand. “It – it’s nice to meet you, and thank you for inviting me in, that’s really kind of you.” She looked over at Fakir again, and saw that he wore a neutral expression now, making it impossible to tell what he was thinking.

“It’s nothing.” He smiled, revealing little lines at the corners of his eyes. “And the pleasure’s all mine. Come on into the kitchen, you two – I’ve got plenty of tea brewing, and I bought some treats this morning before the storm started.”

He led them down the hall to a kitchen that was significantly smaller than Edel’s, but still had more than enough room to seat four people around the rectangular kitchen table that had been laid out with various pastries and baked goods. They looked like they’d come from Ebine’s bakery, and Ahiru’s mouth watered at the sight. The long walks to and from Mr. Katz’ house had stirred up her appetite again, so it’d be nice to have a little something to eat with her tea.

“Oh, you’re here.” Ahiru jumped a little at the voice – she hadn’t noticed anyone else in the kitchen because she’d been so focused on the food and on puzzling out what Fakir thought of her being here. A young man of average height and stocky build with short blond hair, a faintly tanned complexion, and a face that seemed to have frozen in a perpetually grumpy expression stepped away from where a kettle steamed on the stove. “And…” He glanced at Ahiru, and his look became one of confusion. “Someone else?”

“Indeed, the more the merrier.” Charon nodded. “Lysander, this is Miss Ahiru Klein, she’s a friend of Fakir’s. Ahiru, this is my apprentice, Lysander Eckstein.”

“N-nice to meet you.” Lysander nodded at Ahiru, and she nodded back before looking over at Charon again. “Apprentice? What do you do? If it’s okay to ask…”

“Of course it is.” He laughed. “I’m a blacksmith. I taught a lot of what I know to Fakir growing up, but he was never interested in following my footsteps – he wanted to be a big strong knight, like his real father was.”

“Charon, don’t – you’re my real father too.” Fakir looked uncomfortable. “You shouldn’t –”

“Oh, you know what I mean,” Charon said lightly, but Ahiru could tell from the look in his eyes that he was touched to be spoken to thus. “In any case, smithing wasn’t the career for Fakir, so after he moved out I advertised for an apprentice and Lysander here answered. He’s got Fakir’s old room, which is nice for a lonely old man like me… it was a bit sad here those first few weeks after my son moved out.”

“Y-yeah, I can imagine it would be.” Ahiru sat down at the table now that the others were doing so too. “You probably got really used to having him here all those years, so having the house empty and quiet all of a sudden would be weird…”

“It was, yes.” He laughed again, and smiled fondly at Fakir. “Of course, he’d been away a lot during his early training, so I tried to get used to it, but back then there was always the promise of weekends and holidays, you know? But once he moved into the castle permanently the visits became further and further apart. Not that I blame you,” he added swiftly, with a quick glance at Fakir. “I know they keep you busy up there.”

“Very.” Fakir reached for a muffin and broke it apart so he could butter each half. “I wish I could come visit more often, though. I’m sorry I haven’t been around as much lately.” He shifted in his seat. “I’ll… try to start coming around more from now on. I promise.”

Charon’s eyebrows rose. “Why, what’s gotten into you? I hope I didn’t make you feel guilty or anything, that’s not what I was going for… I do miss you, yes, but I completely understand. Don’t feel pressured or anything, all right?”

“I don’t. That’s not it.” Fakir kept his eyes locked on the muffin, which seemed to require more effort to butter than Ahiru would’ve thought. “I just… it’s something I’ve been thinking of on my own, all right? Don’t go blaming yourself.”

“If you say so.” Charon shrugged, and then walked over to the stove and fetched the kettle. He poured everyone tea, and then sat down and gave Ahiru and Fakir expectant looks. “Enough about me, though. I want to hear how you two met.”

“I – I um… we…” Ahiru’s cheeks warmed, and out of the corner of her eye she could see Fakir turning a little red too. “Well… I just moved here last month so I could be Edel’s apprentice, I’m learning how to be a witch… a-and anyway, when I was almost here the coach I was on got attacked by bandits and it was really scary, I didn’t know what they were going to do to us but then the prince and all the knights showed up cause they’d just finished a hunt and Fakir personally saved me from this creepy guy…” She shuddered, remembering the man’s thin, pasty face and leering expression. “A-and we’ve only really talked a few times since then, so I don’t know if you’d call us friends or acquaintances, not that I mind considering us friends or anything, I just…”

“It sounds like the beginning of a friendship to me.” Charon lifted his cup to his lips and sipped some tea, seemingly oblivious to the way both Ahiru and Fakir blushed even more deeply. “Such experiences tend to bond people for life, I’ve observed. Whatever else happens as the years go by, you’ll always have that binding you together.”

“I was just doing my _job_.” Fakir glared at Charon. “I wasn’t trying to… to create some kind of eternal bond or whatever nonsense you’re babbling about. Real life isn’t some fairy tale.”

“That statement tells me how much you’ve changed over the years.” Charon regarded Fakir thoughtfully as he took a bite of a slice of apple cake studded with pieces of marzipan. Ahiru decided that she would try that next after she finished her cheese horn. “I remember how you used to talk about being a strong and worthy knight like in all the books, just like your father had been, and how you’d protect the prince with your life the way a knight always did in the stories.”

“… I’ve grown up since then.” Fakir’s shoulders, so stiff and tense, seemed to slump a little. “I still mean to protect the prince, as that’s my duty, and I know that stories have grains of truth in them… but reality is still very different from a tale in many ways. There are things stories don’t tell you…” Something flickered in his eyes for a moment, and then he seemed to shrug it off as he reached for a sweet roll filled with ground poppy seeds.

“Aye, I’ll grant you that.” Charon polished off his cake and washed it down with another gulp of tea. “Anyone who goes into a tale expecting it not to leave out some aspects of reality, or to go into detail about all things will leave with unfulfilled expectations, that’s true. But still, you’re right, there are nevertheless kernels of wisdom to be gleaned if we read them right, and it’s not a bad thing either to base your behavior on that of an exemplary character if they inspire us sufficiently.”

“That sounds like something my literature tutor said,” Ahiru spoke up. “Do you know Mr. Katz?”

“Oh, you’ve starting learning from Mr. Katz?” Charon looked at her with surprise. “Yes, I took a bit of tutoring from him last year myself… couldn’t stay on as I don’t really have the time, but it was nice to get a bit of a better insight into why Fakir loves books so much.” He chuckled as Fakir turned red again. “I was never that much of a reader as I didn’t have the time, and still don’t, so Fakir’s bookishness wasn’t something I shared with him as he grew up. I supported it, of course, as you should never discourage your child’s interests, but it was always from a distance, I’m afraid.” A bit of regret shone in his eyes. “Now I can carry on a better conversation with him, I think, even if it’s only a little.”

“You were fine before.” Fakir shifted in his seat again. “You don’t have to force yourself to take up things you’re not really inclined towards just to talk to me. We do have _some_ interests in common, you know.”

“It’s never been a lack of interest, Fakir.” Charon shook his head. “Weren’t you listening? It’s always been a lack of time more than anything else. I enjoy it when I do get to read, but somehow I can never seem to find sufficient time.” He sighed. “I’ve started and stopped so many books over the years, you should see my shelf… all these bookmarks stuck in various places in different novels, and if I tried to pick up any one of them again I wouldn’t remember a thing about what was happening when I left off. I couldn’t tell you what a single one was about off the top of my head.” He let out a rueful laugh. “Maybe when I finally retire and hand the business over to Lysander here I’ll be able to settle down and get to them all… of course, I’ll have to start them over, but at least I’d have hope of finishing them this time around.”

“And like Mr. Katz told me, it’s never too late to learn.” Ahiru stole a quick glance at Lysander; he was so quiet that she’d almost forgotten he was here until Charon mentioned his name, and her insides squirmed guiltily at ignoring him. He didn’t look bored or like he felt left out, however, but seemed content to simply enjoy his tea and pastries in silence. Maybe he just wasn’t the talkative type? “So I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you waiting till then, and it doesn’t make you a bad person for not having read that much, everyone has their own strengths and stuff they know, there’s no right or wrong way and nobody’s better or worse than anyone else cause they read or don’t read…”

“You’re a wise young lady.” Charon nodded approvingly. “I’ve met people older than you who don’t understand such things so well. It’s refreshing to hear them from a youngster.”

“I, I, um…” Ahiru blushed and ducked her head, even as she reached for a piece of the apple and marzipan cake. “Th-thank you… I mean… I don’t really think I deserve thanks cause it seems to be really obvious, at least to me, I don’t think I said anything that special… but I don’t want to be rude either…”

“Is that so?” Charon’s eyes flashed with amusement. “You could teach my son a few things, then… I’ve tried to raise him right, of course, but he still needs to work on certain aspects of his behavior, unfortunately. You’d be a good influence on him… though if you give up I don’t blame you, he’s a bit hopeless, I’m afraid.”

“Charon…” Fakir said warningly. Ahiru didn’t dare look at him, and her face felt hotter than ever before. She took a big bite of the apple cake so as to prevent herself from babbling and embarrassing herself even more.

“I’m just joking,” Charon said with a laugh. “Don’t take it so seriously.”

“I wouldn’t if we were alone. I know how your sense of humor is.” Fakir set his fork down hard. “I don’t particularly like those jokes to begin with, but I can tolerate them in private. However, it’s a different matter if you crack them in front of others.”

“… You’re right.” Charon looked suitably chastened. “I’m sorry. And… I didn’t realize you disliked them in general, if I had I would’ve stopped by now… I’ll try to avoid it from now on.” He sighed. “I’m very sorry, Fakir. I don’t want to hurt you…”

“… I’m fine.” Fakir sighed too. “I’m sorry, I just…” He picked up his fork again and speared a piece of cake, but didn’t put it in his mouth. “I don’t even know…”

“I do.” Fakir’s gaze flew to Charon’s face, and Ahiru thought she saw something akin to panic flash in his eyes for a moment. “I’ve been there. It’s all right. Sometimes… sometimes we try to hold things in for the sake of not upsetting others, but after a while it just comes rushing out at maybe the wrong moment, or in a way we don’t like, and we just… snap. This must have been building in you for some time now.” He reached over and patted Fakir’s free hand where it rested on the scarred old table. “I understand. And I’m sorry. I promise I’ll be more careful from here on out.” He let go of Fakir’s hand and drained the last of his tea. “I’m not angry or hurt, don’t worry. Just… promise me that you’ll start telling me these things sooner, all right? It’s not good to hold things in, it’s better to be honest with people from the start if possible, to avoid regrets later.”

“… You’re right.” Another flicker in his eyes, one that Ahiru couldn’t read. “I don’t want any regrets later.”

“No one does.” Charon poured himself some fresh tea, and stirred a spoonful of honey into it. “Anyway, to change the subject to brighter things… how have you been lately? I hear they’re really busy up at the castle, what with preparing for the royal wedding and all.”

“It is.” Fakir nodded. “Life as usual does go on to some degree – the prince still goes on hunts, as it is the season – but it’s become more hectic because the wedding preparations have been laid on top of all the normal responsibilities. I don’t have a hand in most of it, of course, but it makes the castle atmosphere a bit… frantic sometimes. It’ll be something of a relief when it’s all over and things settle down.”

“I imagine so, yes.” Charon took a sip of his tea. “Though I imagine that will be hard on you in its own separate way too… you and Siegfried have been so close for so long, and now he’ll be fully occupied with a wife… I hope you two won’t drift apart too much.”

“… It’s…” Fakir paused for a moment. “He’s… already very occupied with her, so I don’t imagine it’ll be much more different after the wedding. We’re still close, but…” He looked down at a half-eaten cheese horn on his plate. “You might say we’ve gotten a head start on the drifting apart. But it’s fine.” He shrugged. “I understand, and I always knew this day would come.”

“Indeed.” Charon took a muffin and began to butter the top of it. “Close as you two have always been it was bound to happen eventually, whether through marriage or his responsibilities to the country or both. Life is different for those at the top than it is for us common folk… not to say that we don’t work just as hard, but those born into such lofty positions, well… it’s not like they get days off from running the land, do they? And there’s the task of producing an heir to the throne to be thinking about too.”

“… Yes, that too.” Fakir pushed his plate away, leaving the cheese horn unfinished. “I’m sure that won’t be a problem for them, though. They seem… very much in love.” He frowned slightly, but then assumed a neutral expression. Ahiru couldn’t help but remember his reaction to Rue at the castle the day she’d brought him his gifts. There was clearly no love lost between the two of them, and despite that she knew it was none of her business she couldn’t help but wonder at the cause of it.

“Good to hear.” Charon smiled fondly. “Siegfried’s grown into a fine young man, and I’m happy for him. I imagine it’s difficult to drift away from your friend like that, but you must be happy for him too, finding his true love like that. It doesn’t happen every day, you know.”

“… No, it doesn’t.” Fakir drank the last of his tea. “It was quite the… stroke of luck that they chanced to meet. They consider themselves very fortunate.”

“As well they should.” Charon nodded. “They met while he was abroad, right? I’m sorry if I’ve asked before, but I seem to hear a different version of the story from everyone I’ve talked to.”

“Yes.” Fakir nodded. “He had left the boundaries of our country and was traveling in the neighboring land when he met her. They had a whirlwind romance and agreed to wed each other in a very short space of time.”

“Ah, yes.” Charon took a sip of tea, a distant look in his eyes. “That nice Miss Geiszler at market said it sounded like a fairy tale romance, and couldn’t stop sighing over it when we discussed it.”

“I guess it does when you put it that way.” Fakir shrugged again. “How have things been here?”

“The usual routine, more or less.” It was Charon’s turn to shrug. “Nothing worth boring you with, in any case. And we’ve been ignoring poor Ahiru, besides.” He turned to her. “I’m so sorry about that. Tell me how you’ve been – are you adjusting well to life here, to your apprenticeship?”

“O-oh, I – um…” Ahiru hastily gulped down the tea she’d been drinking when the spotlight abruptly shifted to her. So hastily, in fact, that she almost choked on it. “I’m – I’m…” She trailed off, coughing.

“Are you all right?” Fakir peered at her. “Don’t drink so fast, idiot. Just take it slowly.”

“I – I normally do, I just…” Ahiru’s shoulders slumped and her lower lip trembled. “Why do you have to _do_ that? I’m not _that_ stupid, I just… everyone messes up sometimes, you don’t have to call names, that’s so mean…”

“Don’t take him to heart, Ahiru,” Charon said gently. “Fakir’s the one who’s an idiot, I’m afraid… for some reason it’s the only way he knows how to express concern for others. As harsh as he sounds he doesn’t really mean it, not the way it seems. He doesn’t think you’re actually stupid, he just wants you to be safe.”

“Charon!” Fakir snapped, his face turning red.

“Oh dear, I’ve given away one of his secrets.” Charon chuckled, but then his face turned serious, and he shifted his gaze to Fakir. “I did teach you to behave better than this, though – and you must admit it’s not fair to this young lady to expect her to know how to read your actions the way people who’ve known you all your life do. _I_ know there’s no sting to your words and that you’re just a fusspot who resisted learning the social skills I tried to teach him, but _she_ doesn’t. And so you’ve gone and upset her.”

“I… no, you’re right.” Fakir sighed, though it wasn’t one of annoyance. “Ahiru, I…” He shifted in his seat, and seemed reluctant to look her in the eye. “I’m sorry. Charon’s… he’s right, I…” He stared down at his hands in his lap, and his face and even his ears turned red. “I’m sorry,” he said again after a long pause. “I know you’re not stupid and I didn’t mean to make you feel that way. I’m just…” He sighed. “It’s like he said, the real idiot here is me.”

“… Oh.” Ahiru looked away, at her empty plate and cup and then at her own hands where they clutched at her dress; her grip relaxed, but she could feel heat building in her face too. “I… um… okay…” She swallowed. “I – I get it, it’s okay… I understand…” The hurt was gone now, but she couldn’t help but be at a loss for what to feel in its place.

“… You forgive too easily.”

“Wh-what?” Ahiru turned and looked at him, her confusion over what to think deepening at his unexpected words. “You said something like that before, why do you think I should hate you or something? I don’t get it…”

“I didn’t say _that_.” He shifted again. “Don’t put words in my mouth.”

“I’m not! I just… I don’t understand why you –”

“Pay him no mind, Ahiru.” Charon’s eyes glinted with fresh amusement. “The poor boy’s just always been too hard on himself is all. I wouldn’t worry about it.”

“Oh.” Ahiru relaxed a little. That made sense. It didn’t help her sort out how to feel about what had just happened, but it made sense. “I – I understand that… I am too. With me, I mean.”

“Many people are.” Charon gave her a sympathetic look. “It’s all too easy to be your own worst critic. I suppose it’s better than those people who see themselves as blameless in all matters and refuse to engage in self-reflection, but only marginally so as it too can be an extreme.” He shrugged and picked up his plate. “Now then, are we all done eating? I’ll clear this away if so.”

Everyone spoke up in one way or another to confirm it, even Lysander, and Charon thus gathered up the plates and cups and silverware to carry them to the sink. Ahiru tried to help, feeling guilty about having made extra clean-up for him, but he laughed and assured her it was fine, he had Lysander there to help after all, and it had been a pleasure having her there. That remark reminded her that she ought to check the time, and a glance at the clock revealed that it wasn’t quite as late as she feared: her lesson with Mr. Katz wouldn’t even be over yet if she’d had it. Still, she didn’t want to intrude any further on Fakir’s time with his father, and so she announced her intention to head on home.

“You’re sure?” Charon peered at the kitchen window. “It’s still coming down pretty hard out there… you going to be fine on your own? I can send Fakir with you, provided you’re not mad at him over what happened earlier.”

“N-no, I’m not mad.” Ahiru shook her head, blushing again and carefully not looking at Fakir. “A-and I’ll be fine, thank you… Edel’s house isn’t far away, it’s not a bad walk, it won’t take me long to get home…”

“Right, right.” He nodded. “Well, take care anyway, and give Edel my best, all right? And I’d love it if the two of you stopped in for tea sometime.”

“Me and Edel?” Ahiru asked timidly.

“Yes. Though I wouldn’t say no to you bringing my son by again, either.” He laughed. “How’d you manage that, anyway? I forgot to ask before.”

“W-well, I – I was on my way back home from Mr. Katz’ house… I was supposed to have a lesson today but he couldn’t get out of bed cause the rain made his knee hurt too much…” Ahiru felt herself blushing again. “A-and I got lost, but then Fakir found me and he said he’d walk me back cause he was coming this way anyway, so – so yeah…”

“Ah, I see.” Charon nodded, and his gaze flickered over to Fakir in an approving look. “At least _some_ of what I taught him about treating others right stuck.” He laughed as Fakir scowled at him. “It was good to meet you in any case, Ahiru – I’m glad you stayed.”

“M-me too!” Ahiru brightened, and she curtsied. “Thank you so much for inviting me in and having me to tea, it was really nice and I had fun!”

“I’m glad.” Charon smiled. “Come on, I’ll least see you to the front door – and you two come along too, don’t be rude to our lovely guest.”

Fakir mumbled something under his breath, but followed Ahiru and Charon back to the front door anyway, and Lysander trailed after them. Ahiru’s cloak had dried a bit by now, and after putting her coat back on and hiding her book and notes within it once more she put the cloak on over it. She bid the other three goodbye, and opened the door to find a familiar face there, her hand raised as she’d been about to knock. “Oh! Miss… Hermia, was it?”

“Yes, though you don’t have to add the ‘miss’ part.” Hermia flushed and lowered her hand, looking like she felt a bit silly to be caught like that. “Just coming to deliver the mail… here you go, Mr. Schmidt…” She handed him a stack of letters.

“Please, I’ve told you to call me Charon,” he gently chided her as he took the letters.

Hermia’s eyes widened. “Oh no, sir, I can’t be so informal with the customers…” Her eyes traveled over the small group. “Oh, hello, I see your son’s visiting, and…” She trailed off as her gaze fell on Lysander. “M-Mr. Lysander… h-hello…” Her cheeks turned pink again and she looked away.

“Hello, Hermia.” Lysander coughed and cleared his throat. “How… how are you? Do you… have any mail for me?” His eye twitched as soon as the words were out.

“N-no, I’m sorry.” She shook her head. “I, ah… oh, Miss Ahiru!” She focused her attention on her. “I do have letters for you and Miss Edel, if you want to take them back home with you, I mean, if you’re going there now, I know it sounds lazy of me to give them to you here but I thought it might be more convenient for you, I guess…”

“Y-yeah, that’s fine.” Ahiru nodded. “I don’t mind at all, I don’t think it’s lazy, and I think you’d be better off finishing and getting home soon anyway, I don’t want you to catch a cold…”

“You’re too kind.” Hermia smiled, and then dug in her bag for a pair of letters. “Here.” She held them out, and Ahiru took them and tucked them into her coat alongside her book and notes. “A-anyway, that’s it for today… I’ll see you all around, have a good day!” She waved at them before hurrying off, her eyes seeming to flicker over to Lysander one more time before she turned her back.

The interruption had so distracted her that Ahiru ended up saying goodbye all over again before she finally walked out the door and headed down the path, her things secure and dry beneath her thick coat. Just as she’d told them it was only a short walk home, and she was soon sagging with relief as she hung up her wet cloak and peeled off her coat, setting her stuff down on a small table by the front door. Since the weather likely wouldn’t be warming up any time soon, she decided to store her coat in the wardrobe where they kept their dry cloaks, as that would be more convenient when they stepped out to make deliveries or go to market.

She’d just barely begun to gather her things back into her arms when Edel appeared in the hall. “Ahiru?” She gave her a bemused look. “You’re back a little sooner than I expected.”

“Well, I – I didn’t have a lesson.” Ahiru placed the letters atop her book and notes. “Mr. Vogel said Mr. Katz couldn’t get out of bed because his knee hurt too much, so I started to come home, but then I got lost and then I ran into Fakir and he walked me back cause he was going to his father’s house anyway and I got invited in for tea and I decided to stay and now I’m back… is that okay?”

“Of course it is.” Edel shook her head. “It’s your free time, Ahiru, to spend as you want. You don’t need my permission.” She brushed a strand of hair off her cheek. “So, you met Charon? Did you have a good time over there?”

“Yes!” Ahiru nodded. “He’s really nice, and we had tea, and stuff from Ebine’s bakery, at least I think it was from there, and talked, and it was fun, and he said to give you his best and for us to stop by for tea sometime… oh, and when I went to leave, Hermia was there, and she had letters for us!” She looked down at the envelopes, and held out the one with Edel’s name on it. “Here, this one’s for you, and this other one is for me…”

“Thank you.” Edel took the letter and inspected it. “Hmmm… I think I can tell already what this is…” She tore open the envelope and pulled out a small card. “Ah. Yes. I thought as much.”

“What do you…” Ahiru trailed off as she set her other things back down and took a good look at her envelope for the first time. It looked even fancier than the ones Pike and Lilie used for their letters, and she didn’t recognize the long, loopy handwriting on it. She did recognize the return address, however: the Schwangau royal palace. Her heart beginning to race, she tore it open with shaking fingers and pulled out a small card identical to the one Edel had retrieved from hers. A quick scan of the fancy script revealed that it was an invitation to the wedding of Prince Siegfried and Lady Rue, at the end of this very month. “Wh-what…” Ahiru stared down in disbelief at the little card. “Wh… why would they invite _me?_ ”

“The good impression you made on the princess the day you visited the castle, perhaps?” Edel eyed her thoughtfully. “This invitation might also have been forthcoming anyway, seeing as you are my apprentice – mine has instructions for when to be there for the rites I’ll be performing, and mentions bringing you along for assistance. Perhaps they thought it rude to invite me and not you.”

“Maybe…” Ahiru swallowed as she stared down at the invitation. “Wh-what’ll I wear, though… I don’t have anything nice enough, I don’t think… oh no…”

“We’ll get you something, don’t worry.” Edel moved over and patted Ahiru’s shoulder. “There’s a good dressmaker in town that works quickly enough, and if you read more closely you’ll see that the reception to follow the wedding is a masquerade, so we’ll need it to be a costume, anyway.”

“A masquerade?” Ahiru frowned as she reread the invitation. “That’s… I’ve never heard of a wedding reception being a masquerade.”

“I’ve never been to one myself, but seeing as the wedding takes place on Halloween, I suppose they wanted to celebrate both at once.” Edel shrugged. “It doesn’t matter much to me in the end.”

“That’s true…” Ahiru tucked the invitation into her book, and picked it and her notes up again. “Well, um, anyway… I – I think I’ll go sit in the library and read for a while until dinner, if that’s all right…”

“Of course.” Edel nodded. “I’ve finished my work so you don’t need to worry about disturbing me, if that concerned you. I’ll be in my room if you need me for anything.”

“O-okay, thanks.”

They parted ways then, and Ahiru dropped off her things in her bedroom before heading to the library. As she was distracted by all the things that fought for space in her thoughts it took her extra time to decide on a book to read, but eventually she settled herself down in an armchair in front of the fireplace and read more or less contentedly until it was time for the evening meal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eckstein: From German _eck_ meaning "corner" and _stein_ meaning "stone".  
>  Schmidt: From the occupation of _schmied_ , which means "smith, metalworker".


	9. Chapter 9

The day after the wedding invitations arrived Edel took Ahiru into Goldkrone to visit the dressmaker she’d mentioned. Ahiru was apprehensive at first because of the bad experiences she’d had in the past with clothiers in the city, but the kindly woman that ran the shop set her mind at ease almost immediately. She took Ahiru’s measurements without making any disparaging remarks about her figure (or lack thereof, as one seamstress had bluntly put it), and then sat down to show her possible designs and fabrics, with only complimentary things to say about what would suit her coloring instead of complaining about how hard it was to make red hair look good. This dressmaker, unlike the others, seemed interested only in making Ahiru a dress that she liked and that would suit her the way that she was.

At first Ahiru felt overwhelmed by the sheer number of choices available to her, and she didn’t know how she was supposed to make a decision. But just as she was about to turn to Edel and ask her for help, the dressmaker turned the page in the design portfolio to reveal a gown eerily reminiscent of one of her mother’s beautiful, lost ballet costumes. A gorgeous confection of sheer white layered atop pale blue fabric, with elaborate embroidery on the modest bodice, it reminded her of the outfit her mother had worn when she’d danced in the production of a ballet about a young man who fell in love with a doll. For a moment, Ahiru was unable to form words as she stared down at it, but then laid her small index finger carefully on the page and declared in a slightly choked voice that _this_ was the costume she had to have, and when asked confirmed that she didn’t want to look any further in the book. It was agreed that the large hair bow depicted in the sketch would also be made, to complement Ahiru’s hair, and she selected a half-mask to match made of white satin and embellished with sparkly blue fabric around the eye holes  and beautifully embroidered flourishes of white, gold, and blue all around. The flourishes, too, sparkled in the light, and both the shop owner and Edel complimented her when she tried it on. The design sketch showed a pale blue choker as well, but Ahiru declined that as she preferred to wear her mother’s necklace.

The shop already had a lot of orders to deal with, she told them, between Halloween, the royal wedding, and normal business, so it would take slightly longer to get their dresses done. But she assured them they would be ready a week before the wedding at the very latest, which seemed to satisfy Edel. She left a down payment for the gowns – ignoring Ahiru’s protest that she should pay for at least _some_ of her own dress – and then they headed home to get some things done around the house and have lunch before going back out again for some deliveries.

Ahiru thought it would be hard to wait three weeks for her new dress, but between one thing and another the time passed by more quickly than she’d expected, and she found herself cycling between feelings on the entire situation anyway. There were moments when she felt excited and impatient to get the gown and try it on, and yet there were also moments when she felt almost sick with anxiety at the prospect of attending the royal wedding. Did she even know anyone else that would be there, besides Edel? She’d only met the princess-to-be once, and couldn’t really call her a friend, and she hadn’t come into contact with any other members of the nobility, who made her feel ill at ease anyway. It occurred to her only after a little more thought that Fakir was likely to be there too, but he’d probably be busy with knightly duties or with the wedding party, seeing as he was close friends with Prince Siegfried, and why would he want to hang around her anyway? It wasn’t that she disliked social events or meeting people, but after all her poor experiences with upper class parties back in the city she couldn’t help but feel nervous and scared about going to this one. The fact that actual, honest-to-goodness royalty would be there made it even worse, because none of the balls or dinners she’d gone to with Pike and Lilie had included people ranked _that_ highly. What if she did something wrong, something that not only embarrassed her and Edel, but got her thrown in the dungeons? Rationally she knew that that was unlikely to happen, but it didn’t stop her from coming up with wild and terrible scenarios, and she spent more than one night lying awake longer than she meant to as her mind raced with fear of impending disaster. She almost wished she could just skip ahead to the morning after and not have to actually go through it all.

Work and her new routines kept her too busy to dwell on her worries most of the time, though. She was able to meet with Mr. Katz again the following week, and the week after that they began a new book. Her witchcraft lessons were as interesting as ever, and had begun to include not just the making of various types of medicines but food and drink as well, and she was enjoying learning how to cook and bake and craft special teas and tisanes. They continued to go to market and make deliveries as well, and stopped in for tea at Charon’s a couple times too. She saw Fakir on a few occasions, but never for very long, something she found surprisingly disappointing.

At last, however, it came time to pick up their costumes at the dressmaker’s. Their schedule for the day was packed, what with an extra market trip and visits to some of the town’s other shops, plus some deliveries besides, but Edel had assured her that they would definitely be able to squeeze in the acquisition of the gowns. They would hurry through the market for the things they needed – some extra supplies for the spells to be cast at the castle the day of the wedding – and then go to the dress store somewhere along the way in between stopping in at the aforementioned other shops for some necessities they were running low on. Haste was important, for the deliveries they needed to make were all set to be at specific times, and Edel hated being anything less than punctual when it came to getting people the things they’d ordered.

“What stuff do we need at the market?” Ahiru tried to be as subtle as possible about standing on her toes to try and see the shopping list Edel was going over one last time as they prepared to leave the house. Most of the spells and rites they’d be doing were things she hadn’t started learning yet, so her curiosity was intense.

“Well, I’m going to need some extra beeswax and special candles, so we’ll be seeing Raetsel… I also need to stop by the spice sellers, and Freya’s stand for some flowers. We need incense too… and some oils and a bottle of wine. And some blank wooden charms for carving, some simple cords and jars, and a stop by the gem seller’s store.” Edel sighed. “I’m glad I already got the iron scraps from Charon.”

“Y-yeah, that does sound like a lot.” Ahiru adjusted her cloak as she waited for Edel to lock the door behind them. “And we have deliveries to make, too…”

“We’ll get it all done, don’t worry.” Edel strode up the path, and Ahiru hurried to keep pace. “And we’ll get the dresses too, so don’t worry about that either. It’s good that we got an early start.” She folded the list and placed it inside her cloak pocket. “I didn’t mean to leave so much until now, but we’ve been so busy that between one thing and another it ended up happening this way.”

“It’s not really your fault, I don’t think.” Ahiru shook her head. “People have been needing more stuff lately cause they’ve been getting sick, and wanting stuff to protect them as we get closer to Halloween… we’ve had so much to do.”

“True. It can’t really be helped.” Edel ducked under a tree branch and Ahiru did the same, despite that she wasn’t in any danger of colliding with it as she was lower to the ground. “The weather hasn’t been especially kind, and that can and often does bring on a rash of colds and chills that need treating, and I _do_ always see an increase in demand for protection and warding charms at this time of year.” She glanced up at the sky, where the grey rain clouds of the night before were slowly but surely parting to allow the sun to shine through. “We’ll have to work especially hard this week if we want to get everything done – both our normal orders and the preparations for the wedding.”

“I understand.” Ahiru fiddled with her necklace. “Do you need me to stay home on Friday so I can help with stuff?”

“I might. I don’t know just yet.” Edel pulled her hood up more to protect against a weak but chilly wind. “Let’s see what we can get done by Wednesday, shall we? If we’ve got enough done, you can go to your lesson without worry, but if not I’ll send Mr. Katz a note so he knows not to expect you.” She glanced down at Ahiru. “I hope you don’t mind too much if that ends up being the case.”

“N-no, not at all!” Ahiru shook her head. “I – I think I’d feel bad about going if you really needed my help with things, cause there’s so much to do and I want to get it all done in time and I know it’s really stressful for you too and who knows what other orders and requests we’ll get this week on top of everything else? It’s okay if I skip a week to help you, and I know Mr. Katz will understand.”

“Thank you, Ahiru.” Edel smiled. “We’ll try to get as much done as we can so you can go to your lessons, I know how much you enjoy them and I don’t want you to feel guilty... that said, I do appreciate your work ethic and enthusiasm about helping out. It really is a great boon to me, I can’t even imagine how overwhelming all this would be if you weren’t here and I had to work alone…”

“Well, I’m sure somebody else would’ve applied,” Ahiru said, a blush coloring her cheeks. “I’m not that great, I just try to do what I can…”

“And that’s what makes you a good person, and a good witch. I doubt very much, actually, that I would have liked any other applicants half as much as I like you.” Ahiru hid her face, and Edel laughed softly. “You are well-qualified in many areas, and kind-hearted, and hard-working. I have nothing but the utmost faith in you. I am glad for both our sakes that I placed the ad, and that you answered it.”

“M-me too,” Ahiru said, moving her hands away from her face so she could see where she was going. “I love it here and I love being a witch, I’m not just saying that when people ask me about it… and I’m glad I’m getting to know you and so many other people.”

Edel smiled again. “That is heartening to hear.”

The conversation might have lasted longer but for the fact that they reached the edge of the market right after Edel said that; it effectively ended the possibility of any further idle chatter as they set about accomplishing the business of shopping as efficiently as possible. They stopped by the spice seller’s first, and when they’d gotten everything they needed there they briskly marched over to Raetsel’s stand. Raetsel greeted them warmly, and to Ahiru’s surprise seemed to have anticipated some of their needs: she’d already put together a small basket filled with candles of varying colors and sizes that she’d figured Edel would require. Edel thanked her warmly and paid for the candles and some additional beeswax, and then it was off to buy a few boxes of incense and some bottles of various oils.

All of it was done so quickly, in fact, that Ahiru found herself relaxing a little as they approached Freya’s stall. They were making good time, it seemed like, and that was excellent indeed. Excitement fluttered about inside her as they drew nearer and she saw Freya sitting there, and when Freya caught her eye and smiled her heart skipped a beat.

“Hi, Freya!” Ahiru beamed at her. “How are you today?”

“I’m good, I’m good, thank you.” She smiled. “What about you? And oh, what a pleasant surprise to see you too, Miss Edel,” she added as she spotted her.

“Good day to you,” Edel said with a nod. “Forgive me if I seem rude, but we cannot stay and chat – we have several other things to get done today and must swiftly make our purchases here and hurry off.”

“No, I understand.” Freya pushed her glasses up her nose. “What flowers do you need today?”

Edel handed her a list she’d drawn up. “All of these, in the exact quantities specified.”

Freya scanned the list and frowned as she reached the end of it. “I have all of these but the orange roses, I’m afraid. I’m so sorry, Miss Edel! The weather’s been so poor and I’ve been ill a lot lately, I haven’t been able to get to where they grow…”

“That’s quite all right.” Edel patted her hand. “Just give us what you do have, and we’ll fetch the roses ourselves.”

“All right.” Freya sighed. “Again, I _am_ sorry, I hate to think of you having to go to extra trouble because of my failure, I know this is a busy time of year for you and you have the royal wedding to deal with as well…”

“It isn’t a failure, please don’t think of it as such.” Edel shook her head. “You cannot help your health or the weather. It’s more important that you take care of yourself and don’t fall seriously ill, I would only be upset if you endangered your health on my account when I and Ahiru are perfectly capable of fetching a simple flower on our own.”

Ahiru reached over and touched Freya’s hand to draw her attention to her. “Edel’s right, I know where those roses grow, I’ve been there before, it’s no big deal. Please don’t feel bad, okay?”

“All right.” Freya smiled. “I’ll try. And now I’ll get those other flowers together for you and not waste any more of your time, I know you’re in a hurry so I’ll go quickly.”

She worked with haste to gather together the flowers Edel had listed, and made sure she’d gotten them all and in the correct quantities before bundling them up and handing them over. Edel paid her well and thanked her, and she and Ahiru bid her a warm goodbye before heading off to do more of their shopping.

“That concludes our business in the marketplace,” Edel said as they walked along. “All the other things we need are obtainable in the regular shops… but before that, we’ll go pick up our costumes for the masque.”

“Oooh! Okay!” Ahiru bounced up and down on the balls of her feet a little, her face lighting up. Edel smiled fondly at her enthusiasm.

As promised, the dressmaker had their costumes complete and ready for them when they arrived at her shop. Edel paid the rest of the cost for both gowns and their accessories, again ignoring Ahiru’s protests and brushing aside her attempts to chip in some of the money she’d earned over the past several weeks.

“Ahiru, you do not need to contribute financially to this,” Edel said as they exited the shop and made their way towards the gem store. “I appreciate your desire to help, but it isn’t necessary. This venture I see as _my_ responsibility, for your attendance of the wedding is at least partially due to your duties as my apprentice, and I do not think it fair to you to expect you to foot all the costs that will be incurred by said duties. Does that set you at ease at all?”

“A – a little.” Ahiru glanced down at the ground. “I still just… I feel bad that you bought me such a nice dress and stuff to go with it, even _shoes_ , and you pay me every week, and I can’t pay you back…”

“Oh, Ahiru, that’s not how it works.” Edel smiled and laughed softly. “You assist me in my work every day and will take over for me when I retire, that is no small thing, and you have been and will continue to be a great help to me in the preparation for this wedding.” She paused. “And as I think on it… if you would like an additional task to make you feel better, I believe I have one for you this very afternoon if you feel up to it.”

Ahiru perked up at that. “Really? What do you need me to do?”

“You said to Freya that you know where the orange roses grow. Would you be capable of reaching that location by yourself, without my company?”

“Huh?” Ahiru considered it. “I – I think so… I think I remember the way pretty well… do you want me to go do that today?”

“If you can, it would be most helpful.” Edel adjusted the basket and bags on her arm. “You see, after we do our deliveries I would like to get to some brewing, and after dinner I also want to get started on drying and preparing those orange roses for the things I have in mind for them. Fetching them would take time away that I could be spending on other things, however, and it seems more efficient to have you go there on your own while I make other things. Do you think you could do this for me?”

“Y-yes, definitely!” Ahiru nodded. “Although, um… do you think you could write down directions for me so I don’t get lost and have to have you come find me?”

“Certainly.” Edel smoothed down her skirts. “I’ll do that at lunch. Thank you, Ahiru, I appreciate it – it will be most helpful indeed to be able to get things done while you’re fetching the roses.”

“Y-you’re welcome!” Ahiru beamed up at Edel as relief surged through her. She felt a bit nervous about going into the forest by herself to get the roses, but at least she’d have Edel’s directions on hand to keep her from getting lost, and she’d be able to contribute more to the massive amount of work they needed to get done in time for the wedding.

The gem seller in Goldkrone had a smaller shop than the one Pike and Lilie had taken her to before she’d moved here, but the selection was just as good. Edel selected many new stones of various sizes and colors, and then when they’d been paid for they moved on to the other shops. Next came a general witchcraft supply store, where Edel bought some simple cords and ribbons, miniature bottles for placing special items inside for magical effects, a few glass jars, and blank wooden charm disks that she would treat and carve sigils into.

By the time they were done with that purchase, the sun had risen very high in the sky and both women were hungry. As they still had a couple more stops to make yet Edel proposed that they take a short break for lunch at a small restaurant located only a couple doors down from Ebine’s bakery, rather than walking all the way home and coming back. Ahiru agreed without hesitation to this plan, and so they settled down to eat at one of the outdoor tables. Edel wrote down the directions to where the flowers grew while they waited for their food to arrive, and tucked it away with her other shopping lists when she’d completed it. After they’d finished eating they stopped by Ebine’s bakery for some apple strudel, which they ate as they walked along towards the other stores they needed to visit.

The wine store came next, and Edel paid for an expensive bottle of red wine that, she explained to a curious Ahiru, would factor into one of the spells that would be done for the wedding. After that came a stop at a general store for writing paper and some other ordinary household items for their own day to day needs, and to Ahiru’s relief that was the last place they needed to go.

“We’ll head home now and drop all these things off; no sense in dragging them along with us on our deliveries, and we need to pack and fetch the items to be delivered anyway,” Edel told her as they headed back out of the main part of Goldkrone. “There aren’t that many today, but they’re so spread out over town that it will take a significant portion of the afternoon.” She rubbed one of her temples. “Which is why I’m so grateful that you’ll be getting those roses for me, as it will save a lot of time and enable me to get more things done today _and_ tomorrow.”

They reached home soon after that, and swiftly set about unpacking and putting away their purchases before beginning to place their delivery items into the baskets they’d used for shopping that morning. Edel had gotten up early and organized and assembled everything that needed to be taken to their customers’ houses, so as to streamline the process they went through now; it was indeed a big help, and saved them time and effort. Before too long they were back in Goldkrone and heading off to make the first delivery.

It was just past mid-afternoon by the time they returned home, baskets empty and energy running low. Edel fixed them both a cup of tea, and it restored them enough to keep pushing on with the work they needed to get done today. Ahiru freshened herself up a little while Edel went to the workroom to begin on the things she wanted to brew, and then headed to the workroom herself to fetch the bag she’d need to carry the roses in as well as the directions for how to get there. She thanked Edel again for writing them out for her, and was thanked in turn for doing this favor before she headed out, promising to be back as soon as she could.

The walk to the place where the roses grew would be a long one, and most of it wound through the forest. Ahiru had been in the woods enough times by now to know certain areas fairly well, but she’d never been alone in them before. A slight feeling of apprehension prickled at her spine as she stepped into the line of trees, but she ignored it and kept going. Her instinct was to tightly clutch Edel’s written instructions in her fingers, and at first she did, but when it threatened to tear the paper she relaxed her grip. _It’ll be okay,_ she told herself, trying to steady her breathing. _You’ve been here before and you’re staying well within the boundaries. Nothing’s going to attack you. It’ll be okay._

Nevertheless she kept her eyes and ears open and focused her attention not just on finding her way, but on keeping track of her surroundings as well. She couldn’t afford to get distracted in such a place. Strangely, however, it grew easier to relax the further on she went. There were no sightings of anything eerie, like the eyes she’d seen amongst the trees when she rode towards Goldkrone on the coach, and the only noises seemed to be thoroughly ordinary ones: birds chirping, an occasional rabbit hopping through the underbrush, and the gentle wind stirring what was left of the leaves. She could even consider it beautiful here, for the sweet olive bushes were in bloom and the leaves on the trees were now fully painted in autumn colors. Additionally, so many of them littered the ground that it was easy for the afternoon sun to come through the canopy and give her plenty of light and warmth. Walking in the large patches of sunlight made her feel safer, closer to the human world, and the fact that the border with the fairy world was nowhere in sight was doubly reassuring. Weeds and wildflowers and herbs poked up through the fallen leaves, and scented the air with an earthy, almost homey smell. All in all it wasn’t nearly as scary as she thought.

Soon enough, though, even that started to change. The trees began to be closer together, and she found it difficult to move through some portions because of so many obstacles. She remembered the area fairly well, and Edel’s notes made it easier to navigate, but more than once she was almost thrown off-course because of the presence of something new that hadn’t been there before. She also started to hear strange noises that she’d never heard on prior visits; some she guessed were the calls of unknown, unseen birds, but others she couldn’t figure out. The spookiest of all was one that sounded like a thin, distant wail, almost human, and at one point the shadow of a plant behind a tree stump looked, for a brief but horrible moment, like a non-corporeal hand rising up from the ground. That made her shudder and move more quickly, even knowing it was something innocuous, and she nearly tripped over a fallen branch in her haste.

It was with no small amount of relief, therefore, that she emerged into the clearing where the roses grew. It wasn’t an overly large clearing, but neither was it all that small; its size was somewhere in the middle, and at its rough center was an old stone well overgrown with moss and ivy. The well’s origins were unknown, but it was speculated that there was some sort of tie to the fairies due to the unusual flowers and herbs that grew around it, plants that wouldn’t grow anywhere else in the woods. Various superstitions had sprung up around the idea of trying to transplant any of them to gardens in town, and no one dared to attempt it. It was, thus, the only place to get these things, and she had already made several trips here with Edel to harvest some of them for spell ingredients.

There usually wasn’t a _horse_ there, though. In fact, she had _never_ seen a horse there before. Ahiru stopped in her tracks as she spotted it and stared for a minute, utterly perplexed at its presence. She’d never learned much about horses so she didn’t know what breed it was; all she could tell was that it was large and brown, with dark eyes and a straw-colored mane and tail. It had been tied to the well and regarded her placidly for a second before returning to munching on the tall grass that grew beside the weather-beaten old stones. Its owner, whoever they were, was nowhere to be seen. Ahiru blinked several times and then shrugged and focused her attention on what she was here to get.

A few feet away from the well a riotous tangle of rose bushes thrived, and even in the autumn each one was laden with blooms in various shades. Ahiru took a moment to admire their beauty, and she leaned in close and took a deep breath so she could savor their sweet, sweet scent. It almost seemed a shame to pick them, as they all looked so pretty together in their tangle of colors, but she knew it was vital to whatever she and Edel had to do, so she put on her protective gloves and opened up the bag she’d brought with her.

She’d scarcely plucked two when she heard footsteps behind her, and a voice spoke her name. “Ahiru?”

“Fakir?” Ahiru turned to see him looking at her with a puzzled expression. “What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same thing, but…” His eyes, so reminiscent in color of the moss growing on the old well, fell on the roses in her hand. “Edel sent you here for those?”

“Y-yeah.” She felt suddenly self-conscious, as if she’d been caught stealing or trespassing somewhere she wasn’t supposed to be. “It’s – they’re for some spell or something that she’s doing for the wedding next week, at least I think it’s for the wedding… we were so busy today and she still wants to do some brewing so she sent me alone while she does that, cause Freya didn’t have these flowers and we really need them…” She swallowed. “Wh-why are _you_ here? You didn’t answer…”

“Oh. Right.” Fakir brushed some hair out of his eyes. “I… this is a place I visit sometimes, just to think. It’s a far ride from the castle, but it’s peaceful and quiet here… it’s a good place to just be alone with your thoughts.”

“That makes sense. But…” Ahiru frowned. “Is something bothering you? Are you okay?”

“I’m…” He hesitated, and for a fleeting moment he looked more vulnerable than she’d ever seen him. But it didn’t last, and he was swiftly back to looking as guarded as ever. “It’s been stressful,” he said after a lengthy pause. “The wedding preparations, my usual duties, the hunts, strengthening the border… I needed some time to just be alone and think.”

“A-and I intruded.” Ahiru hung her head. “I’m sorry…”

“Don’t apologize, id – I mean, there’s nothing to be sorry for,” he amended quickly. “You had no way of knowing, and you need to get those roses anyway, don’t you? Besides, I was about to leave soon, so you didn’t intrude at all, really.”

“Oh, okay.” Ahiru brightened a little at that. “That’s good. N-not that you were going to leave or anything, I don’t want to make it sound like I don’t want you here or that I think you shouldn’t be here, just – just good that I didn’t intrude or bother you…”

“I knew what you meant.” Fakir moved to stand beside his horse, and took a waterskin from the saddle. “Go on and get your roses – I don’t want to keep you if Edel is waiting.” He uncorked the skin and drank deeply from it.

“O-oh! Right!” Ahiru turned back to the roses, trying to remember how many Edel had said they’d need, and inspecting each one to make sure it was in the proper condition to be used in magic. “S-so, um… you’re going to be at the wedding, right?” She tried not to wince.

“Yeah.” She heard footsteps and rustling behind her, but didn’t turn to see what he was doing. “I _am_ friends with the prince, after all.” Another noise, one that indicated he’d taken another drink of water.

“I – I know, I just… I didn’t know if you’d have to be security or something or if you got to go to the party and everything.” Ahiru knelt, careful not to snag her dress on the thorns. “Although you said you didn’t like parties, so maybe you’d rather stand guard or something.”

“Heh.” He laughed. “You’re not wrong. Though at least there’ll be food and drink.”

“That’s good.” She snipped the stem of a rose that had just begun to bloom. “A-are you going to dress up as anything? I know it’s a masquerade ball afterwards.”

“I don’t know.”He took another drink. “I used to enjoy dressing up when I was a child, but somewhere along the way I grew out of it. Or just lost interest.”

“Aw, that’s a shame.” Ahiru’s hand brushed against a thorn, and she withdrew it quickly. Luckily, her gloves were thick enough that it didn’t penetrate the material and prick her skin. “I would’ve liked to see your costume…”

“You would’ve…?” She could hear his confused frown in his voice. “You’re going to be there?”

“Yep!” She nodded. “That’s what came in the mail that day when we had tea with your father, invitations to the wedding for me and Edel. I would’ve told you before, but I didn’t get the chance to cause you’ve always been rushing around and having to rush off whenever I’ve seen you lately.”

“Ah.” He fell silent for a moment. “So… are _you_ going to dress up?”

“Yes! I just got my costume today, actually, Edel took me to this really nice dressmaker and I found a costume in her set of designs that looks kinda like something my mother wore when she danced in this one ballet, she was a ballet dancer and I used to have some of her costumes before they had to be sold to pay for my guardian’s debts after he died… but, um, anyway, yeah, it’s a really pretty dress, and I’m going to wear a mask and everything.” Ahiru slipped the last of the roses into the bag and carefully pulled it closed. “I – I’m really nervous but I’m also looking forward to it…”

She rose to her feet and turned around, and finally saw what had produced the rustling noises earlier: Fakir had seated himself with his back against the old well, and had one knee drawn up to support his right arm as he held the waterskin in that hand. His other leg was stretched out on the ground, and Ahiru’s mouth went dry at the sight – not only were his legs very long, but the snugly-fitted pants he wore perfectly showed off how muscular they were as well. Heat rising in her cheeks, she tore her eyes away and focused on his face as she tried to ignore her racing heart.

If he noticed her blush or that she’d been staring at him, he showed no indication at all. “You’ll be fine, I’m sure.” He tipped his head back as he drank the last of his water. “In any case…” He stood up and brushed a few stray leaves off his cloak and pants. “I’m going to head back now. Do you want a ride?”

“I! I, um, um…” Ahiru’s eyes went wide and her face felt even hotter. “N-no, that’s… that’s okay, I couldn’t, I don’t want to impose, really…”

Fakir rolled his eyes. “If it was an imposition I wouldn’t have asked. Do you want one or not?”

“I, um… well…” Ahiru cast a nervous glance towards the horse. “I don’t… I mean… I… um…”

“… Are you afraid?” She looked up to see that his expression had softened, and she nodded hesitantly.

“A – a little… cause, cause I’ve never ridden before, there was never a way to in the city or even a reason to, and I never got to come out to the country until I moved here, so I don’t know how…” She looked down at his booted feet. “It’s silly, I know.”

“It’s not your fault you never got the opportunity.” Fakir moved to the horse and put the waterskin back on the saddle. “Do you want to learn?”

“Kind of… I guess…” She looked at the horse and then at Fakir, who watched her with a neutral expression. “I – I don’t know if I’d be any good at it…”

“No one does until they try.” He shrugged. “This can be your first try, if you want – I’ll help you out. You don’t have to, of course, but it at least will probably be faster than walking all the way back home.”

“Y-you’d help me? Really?” He nodded. “O-oh, then… then… okay… a-as long as it isn’t a bother or anything, like I said I don’t want to impose.”

“And like _I_ said, it’s not an imposition.” Fakir shook his head. “Are you coming or not? The sun’s going to be going down soon, so it’s best if we get a move on.”

“You’re right… sorry…” Ahiru hurried forward to stand beside his horse, and then hesitated as she realized just how high a climb this would be. For someone tall like Fakir it wouldn’t be a big deal, but she was much shorter and from here it looked insurmountable. It made her feel even smaller than she actually was. “Um…”

“Oh, right… here…”

Before Ahiru could say anything in response Fakir’s large, strong hands were at her waist, lifting her seemingly effortlessly into the air. She made a startled noise that almost sounded like a duck quacking and then grabbed the saddle, careful not to crush the roses, and put one of her feet into the stirrup. It took her a few tries, during which she almost kicked Fakir a couple times and once nearly shoved her backside into his face, but at last she managed to climb up onto the horse and settle herself into a sidesaddle position, adjusting her skirts as she did. She took a quick glance at his face, but his expression didn’t reveal whether he found her attempts amusing or annoying. “Th-thanks…”

“It was nothing.” Fakir mounted the horse with considerably less effort than Ahiru had needed and settled himself into the saddle behind her. Ahiru’s eyes went wide and her heart started hammering as she felt the press of his firm, well-muscled chest and stomach against her back and his thighs brushed hers. Then, to make matters worse, he slipped one of his arms around her waist to hold her in place as he reached for the reins with his other hand. She swallowed hard and fervently hoped he couldn’t tell that her pulse had increased its speed so dramatically.

At least he couldn’t see her face. That was some small comfort as he pulled on the reins and got them going: Fakir’s inability to see her wide eyes and flushed cheeks at the feel of his body pressed close to hers, his arm hooked securely around her waist. Oh, what a _nuisance_ to be so attracted to him, it really was. He could be a bit weird and rude, yes, and that had dampened her feelings at first, but the more she saw of him the more they roared back to life, and worse than ever. It was rapidly becoming clear that he wasn’t an outright malicious or cruel person, just awkward and brusque, and not so good at handling social situations. He had kindness in him, that much was obvious now; he just was fairly terrible at expressing it in ways that were easily understood. What Charon had revealed that day at tea had done much to ease her discomfort and guilt about experiencing physical attraction towards Fakir. It didn’t, however, change the fact that the attraction was incredibly unlikely to be mutual, which was the real problem in the end.

Desperate for a distraction from such unhappy thoughts, Ahiru forced herself to focus on the scenery around them as they rode. It very soon provided all the mental diversion she needed. “Hey… wait… this isn’t the way I came…”

“I know.” Fakir shifted slightly in the saddle. “I’ve been on the path I suspect you took – it’s no good for riding through. This way might take slightly longer to get you back to the house, but it’ll be safer by far.”

“Oh… yeah… that’s true…” Ahiru thought back to how closely the trees grew in some parts of the forest she had passed through. Even she, a tiny wisp of a girl, had had difficulty squeezing through some of those spaces; she couldn’t imagine trying to get a horse through. Even Fakir on his own would be too tight a fit. “You, um… you know these woods pretty well, then?”

“Yes.” He tugged on the reins, guiding the horse to give an old tree stump a wide berth. “I grew up playing in the woods around Charon and Edel’s houses, and Edel showed me a lot of the paths. She was the one that showed me to the clearing with the well, actually.”

“Oh, that’s neat.” Ahiru adjusted the bag of roses where it lay on her lap. “I bet you had a lot of fun.” She paused as a thought struck her. “So, the bits of the forest that we can go in, those had already been handed over when you were little?”

“Yes. I’m not _that_ old.” She felt his chest rumble as he laughed. “That treaty happened several generations ago, remember?”

“Oh yeah.” Ahiru blushed. “Um, h-how old _are_ you, then? If you don’t mind me asking…”

“I don’t mind.” She felt him shrug. “I turned twenty-one earlier this year.”

“Oh, that’s only a little older than me, then!” Ahiru tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear with her free hand. “I turned eighteen this year, so we’re only three years apart. That’s not much.”

“No, it isn’t very much at all,” he agreed.

They lapsed into a comfortable silence after that, and Ahiru’s attention fell to gazing at the woods around her. The trees were spaced widely apart here, enough that a horse could easily navigate through them, and Fakir seemed to have a good eye or lots of knowledge, or both, for guiding them safely around unseen obstacles. She found herself relaxing more and more as they rode, not just mentally but physically, sagging a little bit and leaning against him as she would an armchair. The feel of his body next to hers and his arm at her waist kept her heart going at a rapid pace, preventing her from being completely relaxed, but at the same time she couldn’t deny that it felt good to be so close to him. _Really_ good.

She nevertheless began to feel a little antsy after a while, because she’d promised Edel she’d be back as soon as she could and this ride felt like it was taking longer than she would have on foot, even though she rationally knew that the horse was covering more ground than she could with her short strides. But just as she started to fidget they broke free of the forest, emerging into a beautiful meadow she’d never seen before. Ahiru couldn’t help but gasp at the sight of it – though it was sparsely dotted with a few evergreen trees, the majority of it was open country, the ground blanketed in tall grasses that would have come up nearly to her waist had she been standing on it instead of astride a horse. Lovelier still, many of the grasses were in fact long-stemmed wildflowers, purple and pink and white. They matched the colors that streaked across one side of the sky as the sun set in the other side.

“Wow…” Ahiru breathed. “It’s… it’s so pretty here…”

“You haven’t been here before?”

“No, I haven’t.” She shook her head. “I’ve never been this way at _all_ before… it’s beautiful…”

“I agree. Especially at sundown.” Fakir urged the horse into more of a canter now that they’d left the forest. “I’m sure you’ll come back here sometime… I think some of these flowers and grasses have a use in some spells or other, if I’m not mistaken.”

“I hope so.” Ahiru’s posture relaxed again, her impatience calmed by both the gorgeous scenery around them and the faster pace they were moving at. “I’d really like to come back, at least.”

It seemed like it still took them a while to get back to Edel’s house, but when they did the sun had only sunk a little more into the sky. Fakir dismounted first, moving with as much easy grace as he had when he’d gotten onto the horse, and helped her to carefully climb down as well. “There. I… hope that didn’t take too long?”

“N-no, it’s fine.” Ahiru shook her head again. “I mean, I think it was a longer path back, but it was faster going than me walking would’ve been, and anyway I really liked seeing different places, like that meadow.”

“All right.” He reached a hand up and stroked his horse’s mane. “And riding itself? What do you think of that?”

“I liked it!” Ahiru’s eyes lit up. “Even though I had trouble getting on and off, it was still really fun… I’d like to do it again sometime! Thank you so much for helping me, a-and taking me back…” She blushed, and hoped it’d be less noticeable in the dim light of dusk. “It – it was really nice of you… I appreciate it a lot…”

“I told you, it’s nothing.” Was he blushing too? No, it was probably just a trick of the light; he had his back to the setting sun, after all. “I’m… glad it wasn’t frightening for you.”

“No, not at all… oh, but!” Ahiru twisted her hands a little as they clutched the top of her bag. “I – I’m being rude, sorry… do you want to come in and have dinner with us? I’m sure Edel wouldn’t mind at all!”

“I can’t. Sorry.” Something unidentifiable flickered in his eyes. “Charon is expecting me for dinner tonight.” He paused, and Ahiru opened her mouth to express disappointed understanding, but he spoke again before she could. “Perhaps… tomorrow night? I _have_ been meaning to come see Edel soon anyway…”

“Okay!” Ahiru brightened. “I – I’ll tell her to expect you, then? I’m sure she’ll be happy!”

“… Yeah.” He nodded. “Thanks.”

“Of course! You’re welcome!” Ahiru beamed up at him. “A-anyway, though, I better get inside and give these to Edel, and I don’t want to keep you, you must be hungry and Charon’s probably wondering where you are… s-so, um, bye, a-and thank you again!”

“You’re welcome.” To her surprise the corners of his mouth lifted in a small smile, and she felt her heart flutter. “Goodnight, Ahiru. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Y-yeah, see you tomorrow too, Fakir!” She watched as he climbed back up on his horse, and waved to him before hurrying into the house as he rode off.

Later that evening as she took her nightly bath, she would giggle and hug herself as she thought again about how good it had felt to be held in Fakir’s arms. The oh so pleasant memory kept her warm even while she stepped out of the water to dry herself, and eventually lulled her into pleasant dreams when she finally managed to get to sleep after lying awake for a while sighing over it all.


	10. Chapter 10

Ahiru awoke just before dawn on Halloween, and as she blinked blearily in the dark she tried to work out what could have roused her. Had it been a dream? A sudden noise? In her murky, muddled state she couldn’t begin to puzzle it out. She strained her ears, trying to listen, but heard nothing; the night was still and quiet, almost eerily so. She couldn’t recall any sort of dream or nightmare either – if she _had_ been woken by some vision in her sleep, her memory of it had already been wiped clean.  After a few minutes’ pondering she gave up trying to figure it out, and rolled over to try and to get back to sleep.

But just as she began to drift away she found herself jerked awake once more, this time by a clear culprit: the loud, harsh cry of a bird, not far from her window. Startled out of her drowsy state she laid there for a few minutes, rubbing her eyes, until the bird cried out again, and then another one in quick succession. It obviously wasn’t going to quiet down and let her get a little bit more sleep before she had to be up and about for a very long and very busy day, so with a deep sigh Ahiru sat up and opened her window, propping her elbows on the sill as she looked for the source of the noise.

The sun had already just begun to rise, but what light it brought she could barely see, so shrouded in mist was the landscape before her. Even the trees seemed obscured by the nearly opaque fog in some places. It had rained again last night, but the latest weather scrying had indicated clear weather today; surely the heavy fog would dissipate fairly soon, by mid-morning at the very latest. The sun was only just barely up, after all, and there was no wind just yet.

As if prompted by that thought a sudden, chilly breeze kicked up, and Ahiru’s breath caught as a portion of the mist, for just a fleeting moment, looked like a door, or a curtain, being blown open and closing right back up again. Had she really seen that? It was hard to be sure if she had, or if her eyes, still bleary with sleep, were playing tricks on her. She rubbed them again and tried to focus better.

Another bird call, identical to the others, caught her attention, and she followed the noise with her gaze to see a large black bird perched in one of the forest trees. It looked like a crow, or a raven – as she’d never been good at telling them apart she couldn’t be sure which it was. It opened its beak and let out an almost mournful _caw_ , and then, as if sensing her, turned its head. It stared back at her for a minute with eyes that almost looked red, and then took flight without another sound. A loud fluttering of wings and rustling of leaves followed its takeoff, and within seconds too many other identical birds to count erupted from the woods, soaring high into the sky and following the first one to some unknown destination.

For some reason it sent a shiver down her spine, and Ahiru decided that that was enough lazing about for now, time to get up and get ready. She scrubbed her face, re-braided her hair, and changed into fresh clothes that would be suitable both for a visit to the castle and for performing spells and blessings. She’d neatly folded her costume and placed it in a basket lined with a clean blanket the night before, her shoes and accessories placed on top, and she slipped the basket onto her arm before leaving her room and heading to the kitchen for breakfast.

As she’d expected Edel was already there, reviewing the things they needed for the day. As with Ahiru’s costume they’d packed hers the night before, and had done the same with the spell items, but she wanted to be one hundred percent certain they weren’t leaving anything behind when they headed out the front door today. Ahiru sat down at the table while Edel continued her inspection, and served herself from the breakfast spread that had been laid out already. The tea tasted a little stronger than usual, but for once she didn’t mind – they’d need all the extra energy they could get today.

The plan was thus: they’d go to the castle, set up all the spells and blessings, meet with Princess Rue to give her the items she needed delivered to her personally, and then have lunch and get ready for the wedding itself, which would take place in the late afternoon. After the wedding came the grand reception and masquerade ball, which would last well into the evening. Ahiru would have been more comfortable getting ready at home, but Rue had insisted, in the hand-written instructions enclosed in Edel’s invitation, they stay at the palace and get assistance from some ladies’ maids she had available as that would take less time and prevent their dresses getting spoiled on the long walk back to boot. There hadn’t been anything she could say to argue against that, so she’d swallowed her discomfort and gone along with it.

She and Edel ate their breakfast and cleaned up without much in the way of conversation, save for double-checking details of their plans and that each was prepared and not forgetting anything. Once they’d gotten everything put away they rushed back and brushed their teeth, and then fetched their parcels before heading to the front door.

“Do you think we’ll run into any fairies today?” Ahiru asked as she put her cloak on. “Will they try to get into the wedding?”

“Undoubtedly they will, for the Fair Folk love such revelries.” Edel slid her arms into the sleeves of her cloak. “But that’s why we’re going there so early today, because Lady Rue wishes for her wedding to be safe from the trouble they might cause. If our wards and protection rituals are done well, no one should have anything to fear.”

“That’s good.”

They’d already safeguarded their own house against unwanted guests and left some food and drink outside the back door as offerings to the fairies, so all they had to do upon leaving was lock the front door and set out another plate of food just in case. Ahiru took one last glance back just before they rounded the corner, to see if anyone or anything had come to pinch a little treat for themselves already, but saw nothing.

What she did see, though, as they made their way through the streets of Goldkrone, were plenty of black birds. Most were flying overhead in groups of varying sizes, but there were also a great many perched on fences and walls and streetlamps and atop houses. It gave her an eerie feeling for reasons she couldn’t quite put her finger on, so she soon focused her gaze strictly on what lay ahead of her, and tried to ignore the occasional scratchy _caw_ that came as they passed another bird. She considered asking Edel about them, but soon nixed the idea as she didn’t want to sound silly and paranoid. They were just birds, after all, and she was probably just letting the fact that it was Halloween and the stories she’d heard about fairies hanging about unnerve her unnecessarily.

The guards at the gate waved them through without bothering to inspect their baskets after Edel presented her invitation and the instructions hand-written by Rue, explaining that they’d been told to just allow the two of them in as they were important guests there on official business. Ahiru blushed furiously at the thought of being an “important guest” at the palace, especially as she barely knew Rue. This would only be their second meeting, and she was nervous and almost queasy at the thought of all that was to come today. She regretted eating as much as she had at breakfast, and she hadn’t even eaten that much.

They proceeded through the courtyard – bustling with people even at this hour, even more so than it had been on Ahiru’s earlier visit – dodging around castle staff as they went. Ahiru gulped as she darted out of the way of a tall lady knight rushing past, feeling like a tiny ant amongst so many people hurrying to get the castle ready for the wedding. Inside the castle itself things were no calmer, the air filled with the echoes of people shouting at each other and racing over the elegant, well-scrubbed tiles. She idly wondered what it was like in here when things were normal; probably still busy, but not nearly as hectic.

Something caught her eye, and she turned to see Hermia the courier walking briskly past, seeming not to have noticed them in return. Ahiru opened her mouth to call out a greeting, but before she could someone else called out to her instead. “Courier! Courier, come back here, I would have a word with you!”

Hermia stopped in her tracks and turned back to see who’d addressed her. Ahiru looked too, hoping Hermia wasn’t in trouble. Her eyes widened as she saw it was Rue that approached, looking stark white and – well, not precisely _angry_ , not really, but not particularly _happy_ either. “Yes, my lady?” Hermia asked, her own face paling at Rue’s approach.

“At ease, I am not angry with you.” Rue’s stride picked up, and Ahiru could hear her shoes clattering on the floor even above the din. “I merely would know where _this_ came from.” She waved a letter that Ahiru only now noticed she was holding, in a hand that shook slightly.

“Oh, that…” Hermia’s brow creased. “I was stopped by someone not far from the castle gates, who asked me to deliver it to you. Have I done something wrong?”

“Someone?” Rue’s eyes narrowed, and they looked more crimson than brown at the moment. “What did they look like? Pray, spare no detail.”

“I…” Hermia frowned, and her eyes seemed to unfocus for a moment as she thought back to the encounter. “I am… not sure, I don’t think I could tell you… for some reason I don’t think I’ve retained any memory of their face, I must…” She rubbed her temples. “I must have been distracted… forgive me, my lady…”

“… There is nothing that can be done for it.” Rue’s shoulders sagged and she sighed. “Fret not, you have done nothing wrong… please, don’t let me detain you, I am sure you have many more deliveries to make this day.”

“A-all right! Thank you, my lady!” Hermia curtsied. “I am sorry, I will pay more attention if it happens again… and a good day to you, may the wedding go beautifully!”

“Thank you.” Rue sighed again, and looked down at the letter. She glared down at it and her fingers tightened on the paper, crumpling it slightly. But then her expression cleared, and she looked over at Edel and Ahiru with a bright smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Ah, Lady Edel, Miss Ahiru… welcome, welcome.” She brushed a stray curl from her forehead. “I am glad you’re here. Come along to the parlor, will you not? We can discuss things there.”

They followed her into an enormous parlor that was bigger than any bedroom Ahiru had ever had. A fire crackled in a fireplace tall enough for her to stand in without bumping her head, and Rue made a beeline for it. She tore the letter she carried into small pieces and fed them to the fire, something unreadable glinting in her dark eyes. Ahiru frowned. “Wh-what is that? Did someone send you a mean letter?”

“Mean?” Rue tilted her head. “I… no, I do not think I would use precisely that word, not really… but it _is_ from someone I would prefer not to have further contact with. With luck, this will make that abundantly clear to them.” She dropped the envelope into the flames too, and turned to Edel. “Now then. You’ve brought everything I asked for, yes?”

“Indeed.” Edel set her baskets down on a nearby table, and Ahiru did the same. She took out first a parcel wrapped in thin paper. “In here you will find the braided and knotted cords you requested, and attached to each one is instructions on what to do with it – some you will want to handle in ways that ensure the knots are never undone, and with others you will be undoing the knots at certain times to release their power. Read each set of instructions carefully and do not mix them up, lest the spells go awry.”

“Of course. Thank you.” Rue took the package from her. “I will abide by all instructions you have taken care to write, for I trust your skill and knowledge in these matters.”

“I am flattered to hear it, my lady.” Edel nodded at her and pulled out a small wooden box. “Contained within this are the protective amulets you requested for yourself and His Highness Prince Siegfried, ready to be worn under your clothing as you wed today.”

“Oh, _thank_ you.” Rue seemed to sag again, this time with relief, as she took the box from Edel. “Truly, my eternal gratitude – I will feel worlds safer with these upon us. You do excellent work, Lady Edel.”

“It is my duty.” Edel bowed her head slightly before returning to the items they’d brought. “And here is a wishing candle, and some bay leaves.” She pulled out one of Raetsel’s candles, a gold one that shimmered in the light, and the bag that she’d filled with large bay leaves the night before. “Write wishes upon them, and burn them in the candle’s flame. This will undoubtedly be of aid to you when trying to conceive, or with anything else that troubles you.”

“Excellent.” Rue nodded. “And lastly, not to interrupt, but you will require locks of hair from Siegfried and myself for protection spells, correct?”

“Yes,” Edel confirmed. “I will also need access to the royal bedchamber that you two are to share, if I am to correctly place crystals for the blessing of fertility.”

“Of course, of course.” Rue paused for a moment. “I think… I think that we shall proceed there first. I have the requisite hair stored in my own current bedchamber, and I will place my cords and amulet there as well, and leave Siegfried’s in his room. Will that work for you?”

“We are here on your request, Lady Rue; I will proceed as you wish.” Edel arranged a few things in one of her other baskets. “All that I must ask is a place for us to store our clothing for later, as well as the wedding gifts we have brought.”

“Oh, that is a simple thing indeed.” Rue crossed the room and pulled on a rope located behind the open door. Within minutes a maid rushed breathlessly into the room and curtsied to her. “Ah, good. There are wedding gifts here that need to be placed with the rest, take them there immediately. My guests will show you which they are.”

“Right away, my lady!” The maid hurried over to Edel and Ahiru, who handed her the carefully wrapped gifts. She curtsied again and strode back out.

“As for your clothing, bring them along – I will show you to the rooms where you will be readied later, and you can leave them there.” Rue returned to where everything had been laid out, and packed the things Edel had given her into an empty basket that she placed on her arm. “After that, we can begin.”

She led them up the grand central staircase and down a long and winding hall, to two guest rooms that each had their own private bathing rooms. They left their costumes there for later, and Rue locked the doors of each room and gave to them the keys before leading them higher into the castle. They ascended two more floors before they reached Rue’s current bedchamber, where she deposited the things Edel given her and fetched out the pouches that contained the clippings of hair Edel required for one of the spells she’d be performing. Up one more floor awaited both Siegfried’s room and the royal bedchamber the two would be occupying starting tonight; Rue let herself into the former and left his amulet there, and then led Edel and Ahiru into the latter.

“These, when placed correctly, will promote fertility for you both.” Edel withdrew a medium-sized pouch from her basket, and Ahiru could hear the dull clinking of stones against stones from within. “I will place them as needed, with your permission.”

“Oh, please do.” Rue nodded. “The conception of an heir is very important, as you might imagine.” Something flickered in her eyes. “I would help it along as much as I can; thus, I appreciate your help.”

“It is my honor.” Edel opened the pouch and took out the first stone, an unpolished and irregularly shaped hunk of clear quartz. “I shall begin.”

Ahiru, feeling faintly embarrassed at seeing the place where Rue and Siegfried’s marriage would be consummated, hung back near the doorway as Edel began setting quartzes and moonstones in various spots around the room, centered around the massive canopied bed. Both bedroom and bed alike were the largest Ahiru had ever seen, and also the most opulent. Blue and silver and white, the royal colors of Schwangau, were the dominating shades in the décor, and the multilayered grey canopy shimmered and sparkled as the sunlight caught it. For the morning mist had now completely faded away, giving way to blue skies and bright sun that streamed through the tall bay windows.

“What next?” Rue inquired as Edel set the final stone.

“Most of the other spells can be accomplished – and some will need to be – in the courtyard where the reception will be taking place.” Edel put the empty pouch back in her basket. “If you wish to be present you are welcome, of course, but I will not require you to be so and don’t wish to keep you from your preparations.”

“Oh, I think I can stay with you a little longer to see more magic done.” Rue smiled fondly. “Let us proceed to the courtyard and I will watch for a short while as time allows. When you must do other workings elsewhere I will leave you, if not sooner depending on how long these take.”

Edel nodded. “As you wish, Lady Rue.”

They proceeded back down the stairs, and out into an enormous courtyard surrounded on three sides by the palace buildings, and opening up at the back to the beautiful royal gardens. Ahiru looked longingly at them, wishing she could go explore. It all looked so beautiful, even now in the grips of autumn. She could only imagine how lovely it’d be in spring and summer, and wondered if Freya had ever chanced to see them in full bloom. It seemed like exactly the kind of place she’d love best, what with her adoration of flowers.

The first thing Edel did was to prepare the protection spell that she would be casting on Rue and Siegfried. She chose a spot in the center of the courtyard, where no one had yet set anything up for the coming ball, and lit incense, using the smoke to cleanse the space around her. After that she declared out loud the intent of the spells while lighting two more of Raetsel’s candles – one dyed orange, the other dyed black.

“While those burn out I will perform the spell to safeguard against rain,” Edel said as she stepped carefully away from the lit candles. “And then, Ahiru, I will have you help me begin placing the iron scraps for the ward, as well as sprinkling protection powder. We’ll finish at the castle gates.”

“This is all so fascinating,” Rue murmured as she followed Edel to where she would do the next spell. “Forgive my curiosity if it is a nuisance, but it is simply that I have never seen a – ” She paused. “A working before.”

“Not even in your home country?” Ahiru asked.

“Not once.” Rue shook her head. “My… family did not hold with – with such things. There are many customs in this land that I am learning about for the first time. It is a bit overwhelming at times, but I feel I am up to the task, particularly when so much of it holds my interest so well.”

“Oh, that’s good.” Ahiru nodded. “Will your family be at the wedding?”

“My…” Rue’s eyebrows went up, and for a fleeting moment she looked almost amused before becoming serious. “No. My parents have been dead for many… many years.” Something flickered in her eyes. “And I have no other relatives. So no, I shall be quite alone of my bloodline at this event. Fortunately, I have found much welcome and kindness amongst the people here, so it will be no less enjoyable. Do not worry over me,” she added, seeing the distressed look on Ahiru’s face. “I shall be quite fine, and the purpose of marriage is to begin a new family, is it not? So it is a joyous day for me regardless.”

“That’s true.” Ahiru let herself smile. “I – I hope you’ll be happy, and that everything goes really well.”

“Thank you, Ahiru.” Rue smiled too. “I am sure I will, and that with the help of you and Lady Edel all shall indeed proceed without a hitch.”

Ahiru blushed. “I – I’m not really doing _that_ much…”

“I’m sure that’s not true.” Rue moved to stand beside Ahiru and patted her shoulder. Not far away, Edel had lit more incense, as well as a white candle, and was filling a chalice with various liquids. “Your help no doubt has been invaluable, not just today, but in the time leading up to this day. I am rather certain she would have a much more difficult time managing on her own, for as talented as Lady Edel is she is only one person, and there are only so many hours in a day.”

“Quite true.” Edel stood, holding her chalice in one hand and a wooden spoon in the other. “Ahiru has been an excellent source of assistance.” She took off, sprinkling the mixed liquids at key points around the courtyard, while Ahiru hid her face in her hands. Rue’s gentle, tinkling laughter nearly drowned out the incantation Edel spoke as she scattered her offering on the ground.

When she returned, the candles she’d lit for the protection spells upon Rue and Siegfried had not yet burned out yet. They were close, however, so she had Rue send a servant to the kitchen to fetch some boiling water while she and Ahiru placed some iron scraps around. They set them atop walls and in corners, and on the stone pillars bearing the torches that would be lit that evening. By the time they’d finished the candles had finally guttered and burned out, and while they waited for the water they broke up the wax and put it into two glass jars; these they submerged into the boiling water when it arrived. Once the wax was sufficiently softened they carefully removed the jars from the water and began to add the other things needed for the spell: some rusty old nails, a few oak leaves, some spices, and the locks of hair that Rue had provided earlier. Only when the jars had cooled did they seal them.

“These will need to be placed somewhere high and out of reach,” Edel told Rue as she rose from the ground, jar in hand. Ahiru stood too, holding the other jar. “Any negative energy directed your way, or the prince’s way, will instead seek out the jar and pass you by.”

“That is a relief to hear.” Rue smiled broadly. “Thank you, Lady Edel, Miss Ahiru. You do not know how much it sets my mind at ease to…” Her voice trailed off and her smile faded, her gaze catching on something behind them. “To…”

“To what? Lady Rue, what’s wrong?” Ahiru turned to see what she could be staring at. “What’s… oh…”

“I _told_ the falconer to see to it that those things were driven off or killed.” Rue’s voice was tight with a cold fury as she glared at the cluster of crows – or ravens, Ahiru still wasn’t sure – that had gathered atop a nearby building with a low roof. “I wanted them _gone_.”

Edel frowned slightly, confused. “With all due respect, Lady Rue, they’re only –”

“Begone! Begone!” Her face as pale as when she’d marched after Hermia, Rue picked up her skirts and strode in the direction of the birds. “Shoo! You are not wanted here!” They regarded her with only curiosity, however, tilting their dark heads and then cawing in a way that almost sounded like laughter. It sent a shiver down Ahiru’s spine. “Wretched things! I’ll…” She looked about frantically, and grabbed a scrap of iron that had been set atop a nearby pillar. “Begone, I told you! Begone!” She hurled it at the birds, and they dispersed, making distressed noises and shedding a few black feathers in their wake. “Ah…”

“Lady Rue…” Ahiru stepped forward cautiously as Rue sagged in obvious relief, still breathing a little hard. “Are – are you all right?”

“I… I think I shall be, yes.” Rue took a deep breath and turned back to face them, trying to smile despite the color not having returned to her cheeks yet. “Now that those foul beings are gone, I can relax.”

“Are you, perhaps, frightened of them due to some past experience?” Edel asked. “If you require a spell to assist you with your fear, I would be happy to provide.”

“I – no, that will not be necessary, I do not think.” Rue’s gaze flitted over to Edel, curiosity replacing lingering terror. “You do not find them at all frightening? Most I have met regard them as ill omens.”

“Much of that is, I’m afraid, mere superstition.” Edel shook her head. “Farmers have a valid reason to keep them away from their crops, yes, but that aside they are essentially harmless despite their appearance. I have chanced to see them frolicking in the snow in winter, as though they were human children enjoying the elements, and thus find it difficult to be afraid of them. Alas, the old superstitions do linger on, and humans do have a tendency to fear that which is dark and unusual in their eyes.”

“… Yes. Yes… I do suppose you are right.” Rue’s back straightened, and she turned her head to look over her shoulder at where some of the birds flew over them, cawing to each other as they went. “They are not but mere birds in the end… no different from a common sparrow, really.” Her chin rose almost haughtily, and something that Ahiru couldn’t decipher flashed in her eyes for a moment. “Forgive my embarrassing display… I am sure you did not wish to see such things.”

“Nonsense,” Edel said gently. “I have many patients who suffer from fears of common objects or animals, or simply from disorders that cause them to be anxious without warning or cause, and I brew for them potions to help them manage their anxieties. I would be remiss if I didn’t offer to do the same for you, and I assure you that the knowledge of such things would remain with Ahiru and myself.”

“You are most kind.” Rue relaxed enough to smile, and this time it reached her eyes. “But no, I do not think it will be necessary. I appreciate the offer, however, and that any… affliction I may suffer from would remain private. I do not wish to share such things with all the principality, you understand.”

“Naturally.” Edel nodded. “We maintain a strict policy of confidentiality between ourselves and our patients. For none, I think, would want the things that ail them to be advertised around town without their consent.”

“Yes.” Something indefinable seemed to flit across her expression. “Some things should not be kept secret, but others… others must not be spread.” Rue paused. “But I ramble on, and time grows short for me – forgive me, but I fear I must leave your charming company now, as I must be readied for my wedding, and must find places for these as well.” She carefully lifted the spell jars.

“No apologies necessary.” Edel smiled. “Go with swiftness, and we shall finish our work by the time the ceremony begins.”

“Yes, don’t worry about us!” Ahiru put in. “Getting ready for your wedding is more important than talking to us!”

“Thank you, both of you.” Rue smiled. “Farewell for now, then, and I shall see you in some matter of hours.” As her hands were full, she merely nodded at them before walking away.

“Ahiru?” Edel said as Rue passed out of earshot. “Can you see where that iron fell – the one she threw? If it went up on the roof we’ll have to replace it with another…

“Um…” Ahiru walked over to where Rue had been standing when she’d thrown the iron, and inspected the surrounding area closely. “I don’t see it… it must be up on the roof, sorry…”

“It’s not your fault.” Edel pulled another iron scrap out of the large bag she’d stored them in, and set it on the pillar to replace the now-missing one. “I’m glad Charon provided me with extras, though.” She sighed. “Now then, let us place the rest of the iron around the outside of the castle, along with sprinkling the protection powder.”

It took them the better part of the rest of the morning to set up the rest of the iron ward, as well as spread a layer of protection powder all around the outer perimeter of the castle. They finished up by tying a cluster of acorns to the castle gates – during which Ahiru felt certain they were being watched, but saw no one each time she turned to look – and then hurried inside to eat a quick, light meal. Food for wedding guests was being served informally in one of the dining rooms, and they grabbed themselves seats at a table in the corner to eat and talk. Ahiru felt more than a little out of place amongst all the members of nobility seated there, but did her best to focus on eating and what Edel was saying.

“– left to do but attend the wedding and reception.” Edel took a sip of water. “A relief to have that off my shoulders at last. Lady Rue offered us the guest accommodations overnight if we wished to stay, but I rather think I’ll be more comfortable in my own bed. Unless you think you’d like to stay here and skip the walk home tonight?”

“N-no, I’d rather go home.” Ahiru shook her head. “I’m more comfortable there too, don’t worry.”

“That’s what I thought.” She speared a small mushroom and chewed on it, a thoughtful look on her face. “I do hope it all passes without incident,” she added once she’d swallowed it down. “Lady Rue seems a bit unnerved. Though, given the importance of the day in itself, plus that it is Halloween, I suppose it’s only natural.”

“Why _is_ she having her wedding on Halloween?” Ahiru buttered her second slice of bread. “I’ve never heard of that before, it’s kind of weird to me.”

“It used to be far more common, actually. But the tradition has largely fallen out of favor.” Edel took another bite. “It used to be that Halloween was the beginning of the new year, so weddings were held on it for luck as a way to welcome in two new beginnings at once. It was viewed as particularly auspicious for both the marriage and the coming year. But then the calendar changed, and the popularity of summer weddings grew as a way of celebrating in more hospitable weather, and so the old Halloween tradition has fallen by the wayside. Rue and Siegfried, therefore, are drawing upon the older ways.” She sipped her water. “Who knows, perhaps it will experience a resurgence of popularity now.”

“Oh.” Ahiru stared down at her food. “I didn’t know that. Nobody ever told me about the calendar changing.”

“The change took hold in the cities first, I believe – in fact, it was from some large city or other that the initial proposal came. Schwangau and other smaller nations like it – as well as country towns far from their countries’ capitals that also dwell close to nature and the fairy world – were the last to adopt it.” Edel paused to eat a little more. “It happened a few generations ago, after the forest border treaty if I remember correctly. So it is in more recent memory for us than it is elsewhere, and I have also heard whispers that there are some with a vested interest in pretending that the calendar has always been this way, to deny and brush off the old ways as superstitious nonsense.”

Ahiru frowned. “But why? The fairies really do exist, and we should learn about our history too. I feel bad that there’s so much stuff I still don’t know.”

“I can’t say why.” Edel shrugged. “It’s only a rumor I’ve heard, and it may be baseless. And it isn’t your fault you weren’t educated on everything,” she added. “I will teach you all that I know, in any case, and it will be enough.” She glanced at the clock. “Mmmm… let’s see if we can finish quickly, I think we would benefit from returning to the guest rooms soon and getting ready for the wedding.”

“R-right!” Ahiru nodded and began to eat in earnest, though not too swiftly lest she choke. When they’d finished eating they returned to the guest rooms Rue had allotted them for their preparation, where they found two ladies’ maids already waiting to assist them. Ahiru bathed again first, using special bath salts Edel had brought with them to purify and cleanse themselves after all the magical workings, and then emerged to the main room to allow herself to be helped with everything else.

Her thoughts drifted to Fakir as the maid assigned to her arranged her hair into an elaborate braided bun. She hadn’t seen him in days – not since he’d come to dinner a week ago, in fact. Would she see him at the wedding itself? She had no idea what the seating arrangements were like, or even what the hall that Rue and Siegfried would take their vows in looked like – Rue hadn’t shown them while they hurried around that morning, and presumably it had still been getting set up anyway. She imagined it was huge and that the decorations would be elegant and beautiful, however. It would be kind of nice to sit near Fakir, just to have a familiar and fairly friendly face close by, but she doubted it would actually work out that way. Too bad.

The maid added a little bit of makeup to her face as well; to Ahiru it seemed slightly pointless to do anything to her eyes as she’d just be donning a mask that hid half her face once the ceremony was over, but she didn’t say anything. It seemed rude, especially when the maid seemed so harried and exhausted already and likely wouldn’t be getting a break any time soon. So she sat quietly while a little bit of blue powder was applied to her eyelids, some blush to her cheeks, and a bit of pale pink color added to her lips. It didn’t make her look drastically different, thankfully, but it did look a bit fun for just this one day.

Next came the hustle and bustle of being shown to the enormous chapel where the wedding ceremony would take place, and once there they had to also be shown to their seats. The harried castle staff in charge of the seating arrangements showed her and Edel to the wrong chairs twice before finally getting them to where they were actually meant to be, and all the while they were jostled by the overwhelmingly large crowd of people all around them, having to shout to be heard, and strain to hear in return. Ahiru tried to spot Fakir during the confusion but had no luck, even when she finally got herself into the proper seat. The many, many chairs had been arranged around the sacred circle in the center of the room where the vows would be spoken and the proper rituals performed; afterwards, they’d all proceed outdoors and commence the reception.

It seemed to take quite a bit of time to get everyone seated, but when it was done at last quiet fell over the assembled crowd. The priestess in charge of performing the ceremony signaled to the castle staff that it was time to begin, and they opened the doors on the left and right sides of the room. A hushed gasp went up from many of the guests as Siegfried and Rue emerged from them, walking towards each other. Siegfried looked regal and handsome in rich clothes of white and blue, and he wore a crown not of gold but of ivy. Rue, for her part, looked radiantly beautiful in a gown of scarlet accented with gold embroidery in the shape of stars and crescent moons, a circlet of red roses on her head and a bouquet of flowers and herbs clutched in her hands. Ahiru gave Siegfried a quick look, but most of her attention wound up being focused on Rue. She truly did look like the princess she was going to officially become today.

When they reached the center of the circle Rue let go of her bouquet with one hand, so that she could clasp Siegfried’s outstretched hand. The priestess spoke first, welcoming all to the ceremony and talking about how they had come here today to witness the joining together of Rue and Siegfried’s lives. She performed a blessing on them, praying for them to be gifted with the virtues of each cardinal direction, and the audience was called upon to echo the prayer. The royal couple then spoke the vows that they had composed, promising to love and support one another, to share both good times and bad, and to remain strong in the face of hardship and cherish the joy that life would offer them. Lastly, the priestess blessing the wedding rings they would wear, and Rue and Siegfried presented them to each other before sharing the first kiss of their married life.

A form of chaos reigned again as the ceremony ended – as was customary, the newlyweds led the wedding guests to where the reception would be held. However, the castle staff utterly failed at ushering people into any sort of order, and as many were preoccupied with the task of donning their masks it soon became an utter mess of confusion. Ahiru looked away for what she thought was only a moment in order to retrieve her own mask from her small handbag, and looked up to find herself being carried along by the crowd with Edel nowhere in sight.

“Edel?” Ahiru’s quavering voice was lost in the cacophony of voices as people tried to keep up and follow the couple and put their masks on; she barely even heard herself, and doubted very much that anyone else had either. She frantically scanned the throng, and raised her voice as she spoke again. “Edel?”

No answer came. The sea of faces around her was composed wholly of unfamiliar visages, and her heart sank with worry. Being separated from Edel was the last thing she wanted at an event like this, despite its being held in a closed space. Maybe it was a bit silly, but she felt rather dependant on her for socializing here, as she was only one of two people she knew, and Edel likely knew at least a few of the guests through her work, if nothing else. And it wasn’t like she could rely on Fakir in the same way even if she found him – he would likely know many people here himself, but they weren’t as well-acquainted as she and Edel were, and he was probably going to be avoiding doing any real socializing anyway, going by his previous comments about parties and his feelings on them. Plus, what if he’d brought a date? The thought made her stomach feel just slightly weird. It wouldn’t be an unusual thing, there were a lot of other couples here and not all of them were wed; the thought of Fakir courting someone was a bit odd to think about, but that didn’t make it a completely impossible situation.

“Oh, what am I going to do?” Ahiru mumbled, resigned to letting herself be jostled along by the other wedding guests. She held her mask close to herself, not wanted it to be damaged, and tried to keep up as best she could lest she make people behind her impatient. She couldn’t even see Siegfried and Rue anymore, and it seemed like it would take just as long to reach the party courtyard as it had to be seated at the ceremony. Oh, how she wished she were at home! Royal parties just did not suit her, there was too much to worry about. Meeting people and talking to them was so much more fun in less formal situations like visiting the market. Unfortunately, she very much doubted that anyone she’d befriended there would be here tonight.

At last, however, she passed through the wide double doors that opened onto the courtyard and was able to dart away from the crush of the crowd to catch her breath. It was now early evening and the sun had finished setting in the clear sky above, prompting castle staff to light all the torches scattered round the immense space. Several hours after she’d helped Edel with all the necessary spells it looked quite different: not just because of the large amount of people filling it, but now all the banners had been set up and tables of food and drink had been provided at the far end, where the castle garden began. Ahiru took a deep breath as she stared around at it all, and then slipped her mask on over her face and carefully tied it.

After a few moments of reflection she decided that her best option was probably to keep moving. She wasn’t going to find Edel by standing still, not if Edel had made it here first as she suspected, and she felt fairly hungry too. So she set off in the direction of the food on the far side, skirting the bulk of the crowd while keeping an eye out for Edel. But even in the light of the torches it was hard to tell who was who, and she found herself sighing and wondering if maybe she should’ve stayed put after all.

“Here, here!” A loud voice rang out, causing quiet to fall over everyone and distracting Ahiru in her search. A quick scan of the crowd revealed that Prince Siegfried had spoken, from where he stood at the center of the courtyard with his new bride. He had his hand still clasped in hers, and she still held her bouquet tightly in her other hand. “Thank you, everyone, for being here to celebrate this, one of the merriest of days. I have hope that there will be many more joyous ones yet to come, and that our happiness does not peak here –” He paused, smiling, as the crowd cheered and laughed, and waited for them to be done before resuming his speech. “But it nevertheless remains that this one holds immense importance and promise.”

“Long live Siegfried and Rue! Long live Siegfried and Rue!” The cheer went up around the gathered guests, and Ahiru found herself caught up in the applause that soon joined it. Her hands stilled as she thought she spotted Fakir, however, standing not far from the royal couple with an unhappy look on his face.

“Fakir…” She whispered his name to herself and stepped forward, but had to stop as someone taller passed in front of her line of sight. When they moved aside she found that she could no longer see Fakir, and wondered if she had truly seen him at all.

“Yes, thank you, thank you from the bottom of both our hearts for your kind blessing.” Siegfried spoke again now that the cheering and clapping had died down once more. “There is much more I could say, but I do not wish to bore you. Let us instead begin the festivities properly!”

He signaled to someone in the shadows on the far left side of the courtyard, and Ahiru didn’t have time to wonder at it before music burst forth in the evening air. Siegfried took Rue in his arms as the band began a stirring, romantic waltz, and the crowd backed further away from the couple to allow them room for their first dance. Ahiru found herself forced backwards too, and she moved around a little to find a better vantage point to watch them. Siegfried was evidently an expert dancer, and Rue seemed to be having no trouble at all keeping up with him.

 _They really are a perfect couple._ Ahiru sighed at the thought, a twinge of envy rippling through her heart as she continued to watch them dance. They seemed utterly lost to the world and people around them, focused only on each other as they whirled each other around perfectly in time to the beat of the music. Would _she_ ever find someone so well-suited to her? Someone who would look at _her_ like that? It seemed unlikely, but she longed for it nevertheless. She’d always yearned in the back of her mind to be loved in such a way, and the desire gained new strength now that she saw the prince and princess together, so deeply in love with each other. A foolish dream with no hope of fulfillment, to be sure, but everyone was allowed at least one, weren’t they? She was sure Lilie had said something along those lines once.

When the waltz ended, the crowd burst into applause in the short space of time before the musicians launched into a new song. This time, however, Rue and Siegfried did not dance alone, but were joined by countless other couples. Ahiru got jostled again as people hurried to find partners, and backed away hastily to avoid being knocked over in the rush. She could no longer see the royal couple, but the dancing that blocked her view of them was entertaining enough that she didn’t mind, and she lingered on the edge of the throng just to watch everyone, her search for Edel and food temporarily forgotten.

How long she stood there Ahiru didn’t know; but perhaps it was inevitable that she would eventually be pulled into the gaiety and forcibly changed from spectator to participant. “Ah!” She made her quack-like noise of surprise as a hand grabbed hers and pulled her into the mass of people as an almost frenzied group dance began. She didn’t see the face of who had first yanked her hand, but she soon found herself being whirled around by a person of middling height in a donkey mask. They swiftly enough handed her off to her next partner, however, a tall, thin woman in a snake mask. The woman twirled her around, dipped her, and then sent her stumbling off towards her next partner, a tall, stocky person of indeterminate gender in a bear mask and brown robe. This person lifted her into the air, causing Ahiru to panic briefly before she was set down and handed off to another person in a mask – this one a swan. They seized her hands and capered around in a manner that reminded her of a bird picking its way across the ground on long legs, and then gave her a gentle push towards the next person. She was then grabbed and spun around by a short, toad-masked person, who handed her off again before she realized what was happening. An enormous man in a rather terrifying lion mask whirled and spun her too, forcing her to practically pirouette, and then shoved her hard in the direction of, presumably, the next person willing to dance wildly with her.

Caught off balance by the sheer force of the man’s shove, Ahiru stumbled and nearly fell onto the ground, caught in time by a pair of steadying arms as her face knocked against someone’s dark-clothed chest. She heard a grunt at the impact, and then the person spoke. “Hey – are you all right?”

“Fakir?” Relief – overwhelming relief – flooded through her as he helped her stand up straight and she looked up into his unmasked face. “I… I’m…” She trailed off, grabbing her head as the world tilted and spun. “I’m kind of dizzy, actually…”

“Hmph, no wonder.” Holding her arm gently to help steady her, he started to lead her through the crowd. “It’s a ridiculous dance, and I swear people lose their minds every time.” She saw him glare at someone as they passed, and the person shrank back slightly at his expression. “Idiots.”

“Is it a traditional dance from this country?” Ahiru asked as they emerged from the main crowd. “I – I’ve never seen it before, and I wasn’t expecting to just be grabbed like that and tossed into it as if I was supposed to already know what to do…”

“Yes. It’s an old Halloween custom… if I remember correctly it’s meant to mimic the way the fairies dance at their revelries.”  Fakir led her to a pair of empty chairs set well away from the dancing, and she sank gratefully into it. “A pale imitation of them, you could say.”

“Th-that makes sense.” Ahiru rubbed her temple and looked up at him. “Th-thank you – I’m glad to be away from all that, it really wasn’t fun.”

“It’s nothing.” He sat down in the chair beside her. “Do you feel less dizzy now?”

“A little. But also a little too warm.” Ahiru reached up behind her head and began to undo her mask. “I – I know it’s supposed to be a masquerade, but I feel like I need to take this off now.”

Fakir shrugged. “It’s not like you’re _required_ to wear one.”

“That’s true, cause you’re not.” Ahiru set the mask down on her lap once she’d untied it, and took a deep breath. That dance hadn’t lasted _that_ long, she supposed, but it had been so wholly unpleasant and disorienting that it felt like it had; it was good to be away from the main part of the ball.

“No, I’m not.” She thought she sensed him staring at her, but when she turned to look at his face his gaze was elsewhere and only flickered back to her when he felt her eyes on him. “Better now?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “Thank you again for helping me.”

“I told you, it’s nothing.” In the light of a nearby torch his cheeks almost looked red. “Do you want some food, or something to drink?”

At his words Ahiru suddenly remembered how empty her stomach was, and that she’d been on her way to the food tables before getting distracted by Rue and Siegfried dancing. She nodded. “Y-yeah, that would be great… b-both, I mean, I’d like some food and something to drink too, if – if that’s okay.”

“I offered, didn’t I?” Fakir stood. “Stay here, I’ll get you something.”

“Okay…” Ahiru watched him go, and after a few seconds laid her mask and handbag on his chair in case someone she didn’t know decided to come and sit next to her. Normally she’d think such a thing unlikely to happen, but after what she’d just been through with the dance it seemed like a real possibility.

She only had to wait a few minutes before Fakir reappeared, bearing a plate and a cup, and she started to reach for her things only for him to stop her. “Leave them,” he said. “Just take these.” He held out the food and beverage he’d brought her.

“But then where will you sit?” Ahiru asked, frowning.

“In my chair. I’ll move your things myself.” Fakir sighed. “You can’t very well hold them while you eat, can you? So do what makes more sense.”

“Oh… right.” Ahiru blushed. “You’re right, s-sorry.” She took the proffered plate and cup, and carefully settled the former on her lap after Fakir placed a cloth napkin there.

“It’s fine.” He picked up her bag and mask and placed them on his own lap once he’d reseated himself. “Just relax and eat.”

“Ri-right, thank you.” Ahiru took a sip from the cup, and was relieved when it turned out to be some sort of cold, fruity drink that didn’t taste at all of alcohol. “Oooh, this is good… what is it?”

“Some sort of chilled tisane.” Fakir shrugged. “I didn’t want to bring you wine in case it made you dizzy again, and it was either this or water.” He paused. “Though, if you _do_ want wine, I’ll go back. It’s up to you.”

“N-no, no thank you, this is fine.” Ahiru shook her head. “I – I really shouldn’t drink wine, I’d probably get really drunk and then really sick… I’d rather have this.” She picked up a piece of spiced bread laden with apples and chestnuts, and took a big bite of it. As she chewed she looked down at what else Fakir had brought her: candied walnuts, turnips that had been roasted and seasoned with fresh herbs, a couple sausages, and another slice of spiced bread.

“I can get you more if you need it, or if you don’t like what I brought,” Fakir spoke up. “It’s no trouble.”

“No, this all looks good, thank you.” Ahiru took another sip of her drink. “I’ll let you know after I finish all this, though.” She paused. “A-and you don’t have to stay with me if you don’t want to, if you’d rather go do something else don’t feel bad…”

“What else would I do?” Fakir shrugged. “You know already how I feel about these sorts of events. Unless you’d rather I leave, of course.”

“N-no!” Ahiru blushed, and hid her face with her cup as she took another drink. “I mean… um… well… I – I just don’t want you to feel obligated to stay with me, but if you don’t mind I… it’s not that I don’t want you to stay, I just… and – and actually, it’s – it’s nice to see you and to have somebody I know here.” She stared down at her food, wishing she hadn’t taken her mask off. “S-so, if… if… if you don’t mind, I… I’d like it if you stayed.” The last few words came out in a hurried whisper, and she wasn’t sure if he heard them or not.

“… I don’t mind.” Out of the corner of her eye she saw Fakir shift slightly in his seat, and she risked glancing up. He had his face turned away, though, and she couldn’t tell what he was staring at. “It isn’t as though I’m particularly eager to go start dancing. So I might as well stay here.”

“Okay.” Ahiru ate a piece of turnip. “Don’t you want to eat too, though?”

“I’m fine.” He looked back at her. “I’m surprised you’re not with Edel, come to think of it.”

“I was, but we got separated.” Ahiru’s shoulders slumped. “I looked away just after the ceremony ended and she wasn’t by my side anymore and I haven’t seen her since… I was looking for her but then I got distracted by seeing the dancing start and then… yeah.” She ate a couple of candied walnuts.

“That’s not surprising.” Fakir rolled his eyes. “The organization was appallingly incompetent… it took them several tries just to find me my seat during the ceremony.”

“Really? Me too!” Ahiru took a bite of sausage and waited till she’d swallowed it before speaking again. “I thought they’d never get everyone seated and then it was just a big _mess_ afterwards…”

“Hmph. No kidding.” Fakir shifted in his seat again. “At least it’s almost over, though, and life can… life can return to normal.” Something flickered in his eyes.

“Yeah, I bet you’re glad about that.” Ahiru ate some more. “Less stress for you now, right?”

“I hope.” Fakir glanced away, and then looked back at Ahiru. “Listen… when you’re done eating there, do you want me to help you find Edel? I’m sure she’s looking for you too.”

“Um, well… maybe.” Ahiru fidgeted. “I don’t want to bother her if she’s having fun talking to people or dancing, I really would’ve just been a pest anyway, cause I don’t know anyone else but you two and I just would’ve hung around her… that’s probably no fun for her.”

“I don’t think so.” Fakir shook his head. “Knowing her, she’s probably concerned about you being on your own in an unfamiliar and stressful social situation.”

“That’s true, it’s definitely stressful.” Ahiru let out a sigh. “I’ve been really nervous all month about it, actually… thinking about stuff like, what if I do something really wrong and really _bad_ and they throw me in the dungeons?”

“I doubt you could do anything like _that_.” Fakir chuckled, but it wasn’t a mean-spirited laugh. “Besides, Siegfried doesn’t throw people in jail for minor mistakes.”

“Oh, that’s good.” She took another sip. “What’s he like, anyway? I’ve never met him the way I have with Rue, I’ve only ever seen him at a distance.”

“He’s… well, for starters he’s the kind of person who’d never turn his back on someone in need.” Fakir’s eyes seemed to light up, and his mouth curved into a fond, wistful smile. “It can make him a bit reckless at times, because he’ll risk his own safety for that of others without a second thought, but there’s never any denying that his heart is in the right place. He’s honorable, loyal, and just… he truly cares about everyone he meets and always strives to be kind and compassionate.”

“Wow.” Ahiru gulped down some more food. “You really admire him, don’t you?”

“I… yes. I do.” Something wavered in Fakir’s expression for a moment, and then was gone. “He’s very inspiring. I strive to live up to his example.”

“You seem like a really good knight to me.” Ahiru ate another handful of candied walnuts. “He must be really proud of you.”

“I… I hope so.” Fakir’s gaze fell to the ground. “I’ve… to be honest, I’ve often felt like I’m not good enough.” He opened his mouth again as if to say something else, but then changed his mind and closed it again.

“I’m sure that’s not true!” Ahiru shook her head. “And – and if he thinks you aren’t, then he’s silly. As long as you’re doing your best then you definitely are good enough.”

“I…” Fakir paused. “Thanks.”  He fell silent after that, and didn’t look at her again until she’d cleared her plate. “… Are you done then? Or do you need me to get you more food?”

“Huh? Oh… no… I’m full.” Ahiru shook her head. “Thank you, though.”

“Don’t worry about it.” He stood up, and laid Ahiru’s things down on his chair. “Here, I’ll take those back for you, then.” He took the empty plate and cup from her and waited for her to wipe her hands and mouth with the napkin before walking away with everything, this time to where she could see some kitchen staff hurriedly washing and drying things a little ways back from the food tables.

She still hadn’t moved her things from his seat when Fakir got back, and she blushed in embarrassment. “S-sorry, I…” She hurriedly picked up her things from the chair. “I wasn’t sure whether I wanted to wear it again or not…”

“It’s fine.” He brushed some hair out of his eyes. “Anyway, do you want to look for Edel?”

“Um, yeah, I guess so.” Ahiru stood up, and adjusted her dress. “Cause you’re right, she probably _is_ worried about me.”

“All right.” Fakir hesitated, and then slipped his arm through hers. “Just to make sure no one yanks you into the dancing again,” he explained, his face seeming to turn red again. “I doubt you want to repeat the experience.”

“N-no, I don’t.” Ahiru cast a wary glance at the dancing couples as they moved back towards the main part of the courtyard. “It was scary, and I’m not really that good at dancing anyway.” She peered up at Fakir. “You don’t like it either, do you?”

“I don’t _mind_ it.” Fakir shrugged. “I had to learn how for functions such as this, and I’m not terrible at it, and I wouldn’t say it’s an objectionable way to pass time… but I also don’t seek it out.”

“Oh.” Ahiru swallowed. A wild impulse to ask him to dance with her now reared up but she quickly squashed it back down, feeling her face heat up at the mere thought. Where on earth had _that_ idea come from? Better not to dwell on it, regardless of its origin.

They skirted the edge of the revelry, much as Ahiru had on her initial search for Edel; she scanned the dancing crowd to see if she could spot her distinctive green hair, but now that night had fully fallen it was harder than ever to pick one person apart from another. It wasn’t until they’d come to the end of the courtyard and circled round to the other side that Fakir nudged her. “Hey. Is that her?”

“What?” Ahiru looked at where he was pointing, and brightened as she recognized Edel’s tall updo and shimmering violet gown. “Oh! Yes!” She started waving. “Edel! Edel!”

“Ahiru?” Edel had her mask off too, and visible relief shone in her eyes as she hurried over to the two of them. “There you are… are you all right? I’ve been worried for you.”

“I’m fine!” Ahiru nodded. Beside her, Fakir discreetly withdrew his arm. “It was a little scary for a while, especially when some people pulled me into the big fairy group dance, but then I ran into Fakir and he got me dinner and kept me company and now we came looking for you and… we found you.”

Edel smiled. “Indeed you did.” She looked over at Fakir. “Good to see you, Fakir. Thank you for taking care of Ahiru.”

“It was nothing.” Fakir shook his head. “And it’s good to see you too. Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Somewhat.” Edel shrugged. “I admit to being a bit tired, however… it’s been a very long day.”

“I can imagine.” He glanced away, and then looked back at Edel. “In any case… I think I should go get myself some food.” He looked down at Ahiru. “I’ll… see you around, then.”

“Y-yeah!” Ahiru nodded. “Enjoy your food, and thanks again for everything!”

“Don’t worry about it.” He looked back to Edel again and nodded at her. “Goodnight, then, if I don’t see you before you leave.”

“Goodnight, Fakir,” Edel replied, and Ahiru echoed her, almost in unison. When he’d disappeared into the crowd, Edel sighed and looked back at Ahiru. “What do you think, Ahiru? Should we stay a bit longer, or go home to our beds?”

“I, um…” Ahiru twisted the ribbon of her mask a little. “I – I kind of want to go home, to be honest, if you want to… I’m really worn out too.”

“As am I.” Edel tried to suppress a yawn and failed, and ended up hiding it behind her hand. “Very well. We’ll see if we can pay our respects to the prince and princess again, and then fetch our things from those guest rooms and head home. I know it isn’t that late, but we’ve been up since very early and working hard.”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru yawned too as they walked along. “I woke up really early and couldn’t really go back to sleep and then we had to be here and do all this stuff…”

“Mmmm. And you said you got pulled into the group dance?” Edel eyed her with some concern. “I hope that wasn’t too hard on you, I know how frenetic and chaotic that dance can be, particularly for someone unprepared for it as I imagine you were.”

“Yeah, I didn’t like it at _all._ ” Ahiru shuddered. “People were pushing me around and they didn’t even ask if I wanted to join in, they just pulled me every which way and I almost _fell_ and I’m really glad Fakir was there.”

“How frightening.” Edel reached down and squeezed Ahiru’s hand. “I’m sorry, I should have warned you about it beforehand. But then, I didn’t foresee us getting separated like that.”

“It’s not your fault.” Ahiru shook her head. “It’s okay. I’m just glad it’s over now.”

They found Rue and Siegfried soon after that; they’d seated themselves at a small table just off to the side of the dancing and were drinking wine and whispering to each other about something. They rose and shook hands with Ahiru and Edel when they walked up, and expressed both regret and understanding when they heard that they were about to head home. Rue thanked them again for everything they’d done that morning, and Siegfried told them they were welcome at the castle any time.

After bidding them farewell, they made their way through the castle halls and up the stairs to the guest rooms they’d left their clothing and baskets in; it was much quieter and darker inside. They unlocked the doors and retrieved their belongings, and left the keys with a passing maid before heading through the main entrance and out the gates.

“I will be glad to be in my own bed,” Edel said as they passed under the acorns they’d hung earlier in the day. She yawned. “Tomorrow we’ll resume a more normal schedule. We will still have plenty of work to do, between helping people with their seasonal illnesses and your usual lessons, but with Halloween past I think things should slow down sufficiently to let us breathe a little easier now.”

“That’s good. I…” Ahiru trailed off as something caught her eye, and her head whipped around as she tried to see what it was. “Oh…”

“You what? Ahiru, what is it?” Edel asked, her expression becoming more alert.

“Nothing, I just…” She scanned the shadows between buildings and sighed. “I thought I saw something, but I guess not.”

“You saw something?” Edel’s eyes narrowed. “What did you think you saw?”

“I… I thought somebody was standing there, in the shadows.” Ahiru yawned. “Someone with red eyes… I couldn’t see their face.”

“Hmmm.” Edel slipped her arm through Ahiru’s. “Perhaps you imagined it… and perhaps you didn’t. It _is_ Halloween, after all, and there may be fairies about in search of mischief. Stay close to me until we’re safely home, Ahiru.”

“I – okay…” Ahiru shivered, and did as Edel had instructed. “I hope we don’t run into anything…”

They saw nothing more on their way home, but all the same neither one fully relaxed until the front door had been locked behind them and they’d crawled into their warm, comforting beds.


	11. Chapter 11

Ahiru made it as far as her bedroom door before realizing that she’d forgotten to take her protective robe off; she sighed and debated the merits of walking back to the workroom to store it versus just hanging it here and remembering to put it on later. After about a minute or so of back and forth she decided to opt for the latter option, and hung the robe on the hook attached to the back of her door. She felt so featherbrained for having forgotten, but she knew she’d feel even sillier if she were heard or seen heading back, so this seemed slightly less embarrassing an option.

Once she’d done that she flopped down onto her bed and looked around the room. She and Edel had just finished making a fresh batch of protection powder, and she now had an hour or so to herself before lunch while Edel carved some wooden charms for people they’d be delivering to during the upcoming week. What should she do with the free time? Her gaze took in her desk, her bookshelf, and her window when she turned around to see it. She could read a book from Edel’s library for pleasure, or study, or start in on the latest chapters assigned to her by Mr. Katz. Or she could even take a walk in the garden and a little into the woods, as long as she didn’t dawdle too long. The weather today was pleasant enough as long as you dressed warmly to protect against the chill, so getting out of the house and strolling amidst the flowers, herbs, and trees was sounding more and more tempting. Or she could read out there too, if she was of a mind to. So many possibilities – how could she choose?

She was still contemplating them all when Edel eased the door the rest of the way open.”Ahiru?”

“Huh?” Ahiru looked up. “Wh-what is it?”

“I’m terribly sorry about this, but do you think you could do me a favor?” Edel sighed. “I hate to cut into your free time, but I’ve just remembered that the books I ordered should be in today, and I won’t get a chance to go myself for a few days. And I need them very soon. So if you wouldn’t mind, I need you to go into town and fetch them now.”

“Oh no, not at all!” Ahiru sprang up from the bed. “I – I was actually thinking of going for a walk anyway cause I thought it’d be nice to go outside, so I don’t mind doing that for you!” She paused. “Um, where is it, though?”

“Don’t worry about that.” Edel smiled and held up a sheet of paper. “This is the receipt you’ll need in order to pick up the books, and the address is written on there.” She reached into her robe pocket and pulled out a small pouch. “And here’s the money you’ll need to pay for it.”

“Okay.” Ahiru walked over to her and took both pouch and receipt, which she put into her handbag. “Do I need to take a bag to carry the books in?”

“Only if that makes it easier for you to carry them; they shouldn’t be particularly heavy volumes.” Edel tucked a loose curl behind her ear. “Thank you, Ahiru – I _am_ sorry to take your free hour away from you like this.”

“It’s okay, I don’t mind, really.” Ahiru slipped a coat on over her dress. “Um, is there anything else I need to get the books?”

“I shouldn’t think so.” Edel shook her head. “I put plenty of money in there for you just in case the price of the books changed – I shouldn’t think they would have, but it never hurts to be safe – and all you need to do is present the receipt and tell them you’re there in lieu of me. I know the owners fairly well by now and I have no doubts that they’ll be accommodating with you.”

“A-all right.” Ahiru nodded. “I – I’ll get going now, then, so I can hurry back and you can go back to doing those charms, I don’t want to keep you.”

Edel smiled. “It’s fine.” She stepped aside so Ahiru could exit her room, and closed the door behind them. “Just be careful on the way there and on your way home, all right? And thank you again.”

“I will! Don’t worry!” Ahiru turned and waved. “See you soon, then!”

“All right.”

Edel disappeared back into the workroom, and Ahiru continued on to the front hall. She pulled on her cloak and gloves to guard against the cold November air, slipped her handbag onto her arm after making sure that the receipt and money were inside and the bag was securely closed, and then left the house. She locked the door with the key Edel had had made for her before pulling her hood up and heading up the path towards Goldkrone.

She could see smoke rising from the forge’s chimney even before she rounded the bend in the road, and Ahiru smiled to herself. She and Edel were due there for tea tomorrow afternoon, and she greatly looked forward to it. Part of her hoped for Fakir to show up too, but as today was another hunt he might be too busy with post-hunt duties, or whatever it was they did the day after one. She’d never asked, so she had no idea. Maybe she’d try to talk to him about it the next time they saw each other.

As she passed Charon’s house Ahiru fumbled in her bag for the receipt, wanting to see the address. Neat handwriting at the top of the paper informed her that her destination was Althaus Books and Curios, located at 21 Spellmeyer Road. Spellmeyer Road… she racked her memory, trying to recall precisely how to get to that particular street. She’d taken enough trips through Goldkrone by now to know it a lot better than she had that day she’d gotten lost on the way back from Mr. Katz’ house, but there were still some things she had trouble remembering.

Luckily, Spellmeyer Road turned out to be just outside the city center, just one street over from the shops she had Edel had frequented that day a week before the wedding during their frantic rush to get everything done that they possibly could. In the week since Siegfried and Rue had wed, things had calmed down only somewhat for them. Halloween had passed and the marriage ceremony had been performed, freeing them from those responsibilities, but on top of their usual duties there was of course a glut of special orders to fulfill as the colder weather brought on illnesses and caused aches and pains to flare up. Then of course there were protective charms against the weather itself, that storms might not harm houses, and early orders for Yuletide gifts were starting to trickle in as well. All in all, the passage of October into November had so far not made much of a difference in how busy they were.

A loud _caw_ caught her attention as she drew near to the edge of the outskirts; Ahiru looked up to see a large black bird flying overhead, towards the forest. She shrugged as it disappeared from view and continued on her way. The sunlight felt a little warmer as she left the cover of the trees, so she tentatively pulled her cloak’s hood back to let it shine more fully on her. A breeze ruffled the unruly bits of hair she hadn’t been able to wrangle into her bun today, and she shivered, but left the hood down anyway as it was nice to feel a bit of sunshine on her face, weak though it was.

She cast a longing glance at the city center and its bustling market as she passed, wishing she could stop by to see Freya and Raetsel, but she knew she needed to go get Edel’s book and then go straight home. Truth be told she was actually a little hungry already from the walk, and the trip home would likely work up her appetite even more, so she didn’t mind so much in the end. Besides, she’d be able to see them again soon enough anyway. So she made her way towards Spellmeyer Road and located the building she needed. It was a large brick building with well-scrubbed windows and a newly painted sign, and had the look of an old house refurbished and modernized. She could also tell it was one of those shops where the owners lived above it and needed merely to walk downstairs in the morning to open for business.

A bell attached to the door jangled as she walked into the bookshop, drawing the attention of the thin, pale young man with neatly trimmed blue hair that sat behind the counter. He stood up and adjusted his glasses, nearly blinding Ahiru as they caught some of the sunlight streaming in through the window. “Welcome to Althaus Books and Curios. How may I help you?” He spoke in the distinct tone of someone who badly wants to roll their eyes but doesn’t dare; as it was, though, he somehow created the illusion that he _had_ actually done it, through voice alone.

“I, um…” She smoothed out the slightly wrinkled receipt and laid it on the counter. “I – I’m here to pick up Edel Steuben’s order, this is her receipt… she said her books would be in today?”

“Hmmm.” He picked up the piece of paper and adjusted his glasses again before inspecting it. “Yes, all right, this does look to be in order, this is definitely one of ours… I’ll look and see if we’ve got her books in.” He heaved a deep sigh and moved over to the tall bookshelf behind the counter. It was crammed nearly to overflowing with the orders of countless other customers. “We may not, however, depending on where the things came from. There’s only so much we can do about slow deliveries.”

“O-okay…” Someone had placed a ceramic swan atop the shelf, and Ahiru watched anxiously as it swayed and slid while the man indelicately inspected the books it held. “If they’re not here yet we’ll just come back in a few days, I guess…”

“I can’t see what _else_ you’d do.” To Ahiru’s relief, the swan didn’t fall off. Yet, anyway. “When was the order placed? If it was before New Year’s that might account for any delay.”

“What?” Ahiru blinked. “N-no, it’s not _that_ old of an order, she only just placed it sometime last month…”

“Last month _was_ … oh, right.” He turned round to look disdainfully at her. “I’d almost forgotten that you people don’t observe the true New Year anymore.”

“Oh yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “I heard that the New Year used to be on Halloween.”

“ _Used_ to be? It still _is_.” His mouth thinned into a hard line. “What human arrogance, to think that changing things on a piece of paper means that when certain things actually _are_ changes with the writing on the paper. Ha! As if!”

“It kind of does, though, doesn’t it?” Ahiru watched him kneel down to, presumably, check the books in the lower regions of the shelf. “I mean, the calendar’s just made up anyway, why shouldn’t we put some things where we want them? It’s kind of sad to lose old traditions, but… it’s really up to us in the end, I guess.”

“Up to – _made up?!_ ” He sounded scandalized. “You couldn’t be more wrong about _that!_ Oh, spare me humans and their egos!”

Ahiru scowled. “You’re human too.” And she’d bet all her savings up to now that he had quite the ego as well.

“Only in appearance.” He sounded smug. “The people who raised me that run this shop don’t like me to talk about it, but I see no shame in admitting my true lineage to all: I am, in fact, a changeling.” He rose and laid two books on the counter, his glasses catching the sun again. “I suppose they’re ashamed of admitting that they were careless and let their only child be stolen out of his cradle by fairies. But here I am, the replacement, and someday I will return to my true homeland and my rightful place at the Fairy King’s side.”

Ahiru blinked. “You’re… you’re a…”

“It will be a bit difficult to find out who my true family is, I suppose.” He sighed. “The people who raised me were left with no information about my birth parents, so I have nothing to go on when I begin my search. But simply returning to where I am supposed to be will be rewarding in itself, and I have faith in my ability to discover those of my bloodline.” He adjusted his spectacles again. “I am sure they will be overjoyed to see me return, and they can then return that wretched human I replaced back here where _he_ belongs, their mischief having been accomplished long ago.”

“I, um…” She scratched the back of her head. “That’s…”

“ _Anyway_ , as I was _saying_ …” He glared at her, and she blinked in surprise. “Changing the calendar date on which you humans celebrate the New Year doesn’t actually change when it is. Do you even know _why_ humans adopted that tradition in the first place?”

“U-um, no.” Ahiru gave him a sheepish smile. “Should I?”

“Because of the fairies!” He slammed his palm down on the counter, rattling Edel’s books and several other objects besides. “Do you think humans just _invented_ their most sacred traditions? No! All the most important things were handed down to them by the fairies. When I begin to rule both worlds at the Fairy King’s side, I will insist that he take a firmer hand with this human nonsense. “

“Um, I…” Ahiru swallowed. “Do you think I…”

“We fairies are the superior people, you see.” He began to pace back and forth. “We know the cycle of seasons and nature better than any human could dream of, even you witches are inferior beings when compared to us. The start of the new year lies on Halloween, it is when the fairies have always observed it and always will. You can change the calendar if you wish, but you cannot change or fool nature, that is human folly and arrogance.”

“… could I get those books now please?” Ahiru fiddled with her handbag.

“It didn’t always used to be like this, of course.” He sighed. “Times have changed, and not for the better. In the old days, we used to be more respected and feared, but now, even here we do not get the same treatment we once did, because you’re so jumped up on your advanced magic and are even now slowly casting aside the truth and traditions, like the new year. It’s a pity I wasn’t born in some bygone era, when things were as they should be.” He pushed his glasses up his nose. “I’m well-read, you see, and the philosophers of old had the _proper_ handle on things, if only you wretched modern humans would _listen_. The old philosophers would be rolling in their graves if they knew of this era of disrespect! And would have much to say if they could, no doubt. Why, in his seminal work _Border Ballad: A Song of Praise for the Fair Folk_ , Herr –”

“Autor.” A petite, plump woman with glasses and frizzy blue hair appeared at the door at the back of the shop. “Do go help your father with the inventory, won’t you? He’s calling for you now.”

“Hmph.” Autor rolled his eyes. “ _Fine_.” He stalked off past his mother, looking rather put out at having been interrupted.

“Thank you, dear,” Mrs. Althaus called after him, even as she made her way over to take his place behind the counter. Once her son was safely out of earshot she fixed Ahiru with an apologetic gaze. “I’m so sorry about that. I’ve _told_ him about ranting on to the customers, but he never does listen to me… convinced he’s above me, he is…” She sighed.

“It’s okay, it’s not your fault.” Ahiru gave her a sympathetic look. “I’m sorry he doesn’t treat you well, he should be nicer… even if he doesn’t believe that you’re his birth mother, he still should be respectful to you…”

“Well, I… you know, I’m not sure where he got that whole idea, it’s a source of confusion for his father and me… I couldn’t…” She cleared her throat. “Look, I’ll just get this done for you, all right? I see Autor left the receipt behind… this is Lady Edel’s order, right?”

“Um, yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “She sent me in to pick it up, is that all right?” She didn’t know whether or not to apologize for what she’d said to make Mrs. Althaus uncomfortable; either way seemed terribly awkward.

“Of course, of course.” She waved a hand. “Lady Edel’s a good customer and an even better witch, she’s always welcome here. I take it you’re her new apprentice? You’re welcome here too, then.”

“Th-thank you.” Ahiru smiled. “A-and yes, I am.”

“Mmmm.” She made a noncommittal sound, and then concentrated on processing the order. Ahiru gave her the money when she announced the total, and once it had changed hands Mrs. Althaus wrapped up the books in some brown paper and handed them over to her. “You have a good day now, and give Lady Edel my best.”

“I will! Thank you! And you too!” Ahiru waved at her before heading back out of the shop.

She found herself dwelling on Autor’s strangeness all the way home. Not once since first hearing the tales of changelings and stolen children would she have guessed that she’d one day meet someone who believed they actually were a changeling, and took pride in the fact besides. It wasn’t that uncommon a fantasy to believe oneself to secretly be royalty, to be fair, but most people tended to imagine themselves as long-lost _human_ royal heirs. It actually made her want to read more about the subject, because in the end she didn’t know much of anything at all about changelings.

So distracted was she that when she rounded the bend after passing Charon’s house and saw someone else walking towards Edel’s house she jumped and nearly dropped her books. It registered a split-second later that she knew the person, though, and she felt beyond silly. “Hermia!” Ahiru called out, trying to ignore the flush of embarrassment at her jitteriness that was creeping into her cheeks. “Hi!”

“Huh? Oh, Miss Ahiru!” Hermia looked over her shoulder, and her face brightened when she saw Ahiru. “Oh, good timing!” She turned on her heel and rushed back to her. “I have letters for the both of you, let me fetch them out…” She dug around in her bag and produced two fancy-looking envelopes that put Ahiru in mind of the invitations to the royal wedding, as well as a slightly plainer yet no less expensive looking one. “That’s all for today, I’m afraid, but I think you’ll like these anyway.” She beamed down at her.

“Thank you!” Ahiru smiled. “H-how are you, by the way?”

“Good. Busy. You know how it is.” Hermia shrugged. “Speaking of, I’ve got to rush off, there’s still more to deliver… I’m so sorry I can’t stay and chat, but I’ve got to get these to people by the end of the day.” She adjusted her bag. “You have a good day, Miss Ahiru! I’ll see you soon!”

“Bye! Thanks!” Ahiru waved as Hermia scurried back up the path and disappeared round the bend.

She continued the short rest of the way after that, not stopping to look at the letters until she was inside the house. The slightly plainer one was addressed to her, and the return address gave her pause: “Lady Lilie of House Teufel (but maybe not for much longer! See inside!)” That promised rather interesting content in the letter, she was sure. The other two were, as she suspected, from the Schwangau Palace, one for her and one for Edel, sent jointly by Siegfried and Rue Weiss. What they could be she couldn’t guess, but she took them and the books along to the kitchen after doffing her cloak and coat. She could smell food cooking even from here, and it made her stomach rumble.

“Ah, there you are, Ahiru.” Edel looked over from where she busily prepared breaded meat cutlets and noodles. “You didn’t have any trouble, did you?”

“No, not really… am I late?” Ahiru frowned. “S-sorry, it’s just… that weird guy at the shop started rambling on and he wouldn’t listen to me and he just kept going and who _knows_ how long he might’ve talked if his mother hadn’t interrupted…”

“Oh, young Autor?” Edel chuckled. “Yes, I’ve been present for his rants before, I know what he’s like. Don’t worry about it, Ahiru, you’re not late anyway. Sit down and relax. I see the order was there?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru set the books down on the table and seated herself. “We got letters from the palace, too, from the prince and princess… one for you and one for me. I wonder what they are…”

“Probably thank-you notes for the wedding gifts.” Edel shrugged and returned her attention to cooking. “More prompt than I would’ve expected, but then, unlike ordinary people they can have someone write such things _for_ them instead of doing it themselves.”

“That’s true.” Ahiru tore open the letter and read it; as Edel had guessed, it was a short, formal thank-you for the wedding gift she’d brought. The tone of the note had the feeling of a form letter, written by a servant who merely changed such details as the name of the addressee and what gift they’d given. It was a little bit disappointing after how friendly Rue had been at the wedding, but then, she probably had far too much to do now that she’d officially become the princess to write out so many notes herself. She couldn’t hold it against her.

“We’ll get to work on that lavender tincture after lunch.” Edel stirred the noodles. “I hope you’re not too worn out after your run-in with Autor.” She looked over her shoulder and winked.

“No, I’m fine.” Ahiru giggled. “He was weird, but he didn’t get to go on _too_ long, I guess…” She rested her chin on her hands. “Why do you think he thinks that about himself, anyway?”

“I can’t say.” Edel shrugged. “He might just have found the notion romantic in some way and fixed on it, the way other young boys and girls fancy themselves kidnapped royalty.”

“Yeah, I was thinking about that.” Ahiru glanced over at the books. Lilie’s letter sat next to them, tempting her, but she’d save it for after dinner. “He probably read about changelings and thought it sounded like something he wanted to be, for some reason… although he’s so convinced I wonder if there’s some deeper reason…”

“Could be.” She shrugged again. “I wouldn’t know. It’s not something his parents seem to enjoy talking about, and I don’t know the family well enough to know what might have occurred during his childhood to get such an idea lodged so firmly in his head.”

“Do you think it’d be all right if I read about changelings and stuff?” Ahiru looked anxiously up at her. “I mean, I’m curious, but I’m not going to go bother them or anything, I’m just more interested in the subject now…”

“Hmmm.” Edel pursed her lips. “If you’re treating them as a curiosity, a mystery to unravel for your own amusement, then I’d say that’d be in poor taste whether you approached them on it or not. But if he merely got you interested in the subject in general that’s not a bad thing.”

“N-no, nothing like that.” Ahiru shook her head. “I just want to learn cause I don’t know much about changelings at all. I know their private family stuff is none of my business.”

“That’s fine, then.”  Edel nodded. “Anyway, do you think you could help me by setting the table? Our food will be ready soon enough, and I can’t step away… I should’ve done it before I started in, but oh well.”

“Of course!” Ahiru leapt up from the table. “I don’t mind, so don’t feel bad,” she added.

Edel smiled. “Thank you, Ahiru.”

Ahiru set the table while Edel finished fixing their food; she moved so slowly as to avoid dropping and breaking anything that by the time she was done their lunch was all ready. Edel poured them tea and served piping hot portions of cutlets and noodles onto their plates. After a long walk to and from the book shop in the chilly autumn air a nice warm meal seemed positively heavenly, and Ahiru eagerly dug in after enthusiastically thanking Edel for her efforts. The meat was perfectly cooked inside its crispy coating of bread crumbs and fresh herbs, one of Ahiru’s favorite recipes, and the noodles were just right as well. Edel was such a good cook, and Ahiru thought wistfully about how she’d like to develop her own meager skill at it.

After lunch and cleanup it was time to head to the workroom for tincture brewing. Ahiru ran back to her room to fetch out her work robe and drop off Lilie’s letter while Edel took her new books to the library. When she got there Edel already had the supplies arranged on the table: a large quantity of dried lavender flowers, bottles of korn, and some clean, empty jars.

“There’s little to do at this stage,” Edel told her as she fastened her work robe and moved over to the table. “All I need you to do is chop up all this lavender, and then divide it up among the jars. Then we’ll pour the alcohol over it, seal the jars, and wait. Once the lavender has steeped for a few weeks comes the last bit of work. It’s really rather easy.”

“Yeah, it sounds like it.” Ahiru rolled up her sleeves and picked up the knife. “Do they have to be any particular size when I chop them?”

“No, but do try to keep them uniform – it’ll look nicer and ensure the batches are identical.”

“R-right, of course.” Ahiru nodded, and set to work. She’d gotten rather good at this sort of thing by now, so it wasn’t an insurmountable task. Still, there was quite a bit of lavender here, so it would take her a while as she wanted to be a bit slow and careful.

Once she’d finally finished that step, Edel helped her divide her work evenly among the jars. Edel then opened up the korn bottles, and they poured enough into the jars to cover the chopped lavender completely. After making sure that the lavender moved around when gently swirled they sealed the jars.

“We’ll shake these up, gently, most days of the week while we let these steep,” Edel told her as they moved the jars to one of the workroom shelves after washing their hands. “A few of these we’ll deliver to customers who have ordered some, but the rest we’ll use in other products that we make, or in cooking – we’ll have plenty of uses for this both personal and professional. I never go for very long without making a fresh batch because of how versatile it is.” She glanced down at Ahiru and smiled. “Have you used any in a bath yet?”

“No, I haven’t.” Ahiru shook her head. “Is it good? It smells really nice.”

“It’s excellent. Try it sometime; it will do wonders for your relaxation and sleep.” She patted Ahiru’s hand. “I still have some left from the last batch, I’ll dig that out for you later if you like – right now I think we should –”

A loud, frantic pounding on the front door cut off the rest of what Edel started to say. They glanced briefly at each other, and then Edel took off at a near-run with Ahiru following close behind. The pounding continued without much of a pause as they rushed to the door, and Ahiru’s stomach did anxious little flips.

“What is the…” Edel’s voice trailed off as she yanked open the door and came face to face with the raised fist of none other than Prince Siegfried, accompanied by a few knights on horseback. “Your… Your Highness, what is…”

“Lady Edel… I…” Siegfried lowered his hand. “I’m sorry to… that is, I…” He moistened his lips, his face looking even paler than usual. “I hate to be the one to tell you this, but… well, we need… that is… there’s been… I’m so sorry, but your… your nephew is…”

He stepped aside, and Ahiru gasped in horror as she saw Fakir. He sat slumped in the saddle of someone else’s horse, held up by its rider – his eyes were closed and his clothes ripped, and there was blood, so much blood – her heart lurched. “Fakir…”

“I…” Ahiru looked over, and saw that Edel had gone pale too. “… Bring him in.” Her voice was steady, but Ahiru could tell that it was an effort to keep it that way. “Quickly. Follow me.” She turned on her heel and began to march away. “You come with me too, Ahiru.”

“R-right…” Ahiru spared another worried glance back at Fakir, and then followed Edel. Behind them, she could hear Siegfried giving orders to the other knights, and soon enough the clatter of booted feet had begun to follow after both of them.

“I’ll put him in the room next to yours,” Edel said in a low voice as they headed down the hall. “It will be easiest, I think, to have you always there.”

“O-okay.” Ahiru glanced back again. Two of the knights bore Fakir between them, and Siegfried led them as they marched after her and Edel. “Do – do you think he’ll… do you think he’ll be…” Her voice failed her.

“We’ll do what we can.” Edel said, her voice giving away little of what she must be feeling at the moment. She led them all to the bedroom beside Ahiru’s. It seemed to be roughly the same size, but the bed was a little larger and arranged so that its headboard was against the wall beneath the window. “Just a moment…” Edel pulled the sheets back, and fetched out a large, protective cloth from the chest of drawers; Ahiru could see a sigil for increased absorbency on its corner. “Ahiru, help me spread this on the bed.”

“Right!” Ahiru hurried over and did as she was told, helping to spread the cloth over the bed and smooth it out.

“Now, lay him down,” Edel instructed the knights. “Carefully – you mustn’t jostle him more than the ride here has already done.”

“Of course, mistress.” One of the knights – a tall, dark-skinned man that Ahiru remembered in a detached sort of way as being the one who’d directed her and Malen to the dorms that day – nodded respectfully at Edel. He and the shorter, stockier woman who’d carried Fakir inside laid him gently on the bed as Edel had directed. Fakir stirred slightly, but didn’t open his eyes.

“Ahiru.” Edel turned towards her. “Help me remove his shirt, please – we need to look at the wounds and clean them.”

“Of – of course.” Ahiru nodded, and moved to the other side of the bed so she could help take Fakir’s shirt off. It clung to him in places, sticky with blood as it was; Ahiru’s stomach churned and she found herself torn between breathing through her mouth to avoid inhaling the scent, and clamping her lips together in an effort to keep the lunch that threatened to claw its way back up her throat inside. In the end they managed to get the thing off, and Ahiru gasped again. His torso was covered in small slashes, and there were some on his arms too, but worst of all was the big one that started at his shoulder and continued down over his chest and stomach. Dried blood coated his skin nearly everywhere around the cuts.

“They’re all shallow.” Edel let her breath out, sounding relieved. “I know it looks terrible, especially that large one, but none of them are deep enough to require any stitching, which is a good thing indeed. We need to clean and bandage him quickly, though, make no mistake.”

“His hand, too,” said the female knight from behind them, a sallow-skinned young woman with curly hair bound tightly atop her head. “We tried to bandage it with what we had, but it needs treatment too.”

“His…” Edel’s voice trailed off as she and Ahiru spotted it at the same time: Fakir’s right hand, lying limp on the bed with a makeshift bandage wrapped around it. It looked as though someone had torn off part of their shirt and tied it round Fakir’s palm; it too was soaked with blood. Ahiru held her breath as Edel lifted it up and carefully undid the scrap of cloth, and Fakir moaned slightly as it was peeled away from his skin.

“Oh… oh no…” Ahiru breathed, nearly bringing her own blood-stained hands to her mouth in her horror but remembering just in time. Some sort of small, thin blade had pierced Fakir’s hand and gone straight through, leaving a wound that wasn’t large but made her shudder anyway at how much it must have hurt him. Edel examined it, and then went over to the washbasin, where a bowl of water and some soap sat, and washed the blood off her hands. When she’d dried them, she dumped the water into a large pot on the floor, and refilled the bowl from a pitcher.

“We pulled out the knife and bandaged it as tightly as we could to stop the bleeding,” the lady knight said. “I hope that’s all right.”

“Well… the bleeding does appear to be stopped, so…” Edel took a deep breath and let it out. “Ahiru, wash your hands and then open up that cabinet there – you’ll find all the things we need for cleaning and treating these wounds inside. I’ll get the bandages.” She walked over and opened up another drawer, pulling out some clean cloth bandages.

“Y-yes!” Ahiru hurried over to the washbasin to cleanse her hands, and when she’d dried them off went to the cabinet in question and scanned the contents frantically for what she knew they’d need. They’d just restocked this room last week with fresh supplies of medicines for treating injuries and illnesses; Edel liked the guest rooms to be fully prepared in advance for emergencies such as this, so that time didn’t have to be wasted on running to the basement or workroom for whatever was needed. Edel did send the two knights off for fresh water, though, and Ahiru heard them leave as though from a distance while she gathered things into her arms.

“What happened?” Edel asked as she and Ahiru began to carefully clean Fakir’s wounds. His eyes were still closed, and his breathing was shallow and erratic from pain. “These wounds look to be of human origin, not beast.”

“Bandits.” Out of the corner of her eye Ahiru saw Siegfried drag a shaking hand through his white hair, his face still as pale as the feathery locks. “The remnants of a gang that attacked a coach two months ago. We routed most of them, but they clearly sought revenge upon us, and now…” He gestured helplessly at Fakir. “They ambushed us.”

“Are there any other injured that I need to tend to?” Edel wiped some dried blood from Fakir’s shoulder.

“None so grievously as this.” Siegfried shook his head. “Minor injuries were sustained by a few others in our company, but they did not require immediate attention and rode on to the castle to be seen to there. This… this was the worst, and we rode straight to you; I am grateful for your proximity to the forest, but I apologize for bringing your nephew to you in such a state. I should have…” He dragged a hand through his hair again, looking lost. “I should have protected him better, he is my knight and one of my citizens and my friend, I owe him my…” He stopped. “I am a failure of a Prince.”

“You are nothing of the sort, and self-flagellation will not change or help things.” Edel paused, and softened her tone. “Forgive me, Your Highness, I do not mean to sound so harsh… I merely meant that you should not be so hard on yourself, I do not blame you and I do not think Fakir would either.”

“… I know.” Siegfried’s shoulders slumped, and he sighed. “You owe me no apology, Lady Edel – for you are right, and even if you had been out of line this is your family that lies wounded upon the bed, it is natural for you to be stressed and unhappy. I cannot hold such a thing against you.”

“… You are kind.” Edel opened up a jar of strong-smelling antiseptic ointment and held it out to Ahiru. “Here – spread this over the wounds while I tend to his hand.”

Ahiru nodded and wordlessly took the jar from Edel. Setting it down on the bed, she scooped up some of the ointment onto her fingers and began to rub it carefully over the slashes on his chest. As she did Fakir’s eyes fluttered open, and he looked straight at her. “Ah… Ahi…”

“Shhhh, no.” Ahiru shook her head, feeling a lump form in her throat. The look in his eyes was so hazy, and his brown skin was paler than it should’ve been thanks to blood loss. “Don’t talk. Save your strength.”

“I…” He took a deep breath, let it out slowly, and then closed his eyes again with an almost inaudible sigh. Tears pricked at Ahiru’s eyes as she stared at him, and she swallowed hard before returning to the gentle application of ointment to his wounds.

Once his injuries had been cleaned and dressed with additional medicine to guard against infection and speed the healing process, Edel had Ahiru help her bandage him up. Fakir stirred again during that process, and made noises indicating the pain that moving him into something of a sitting position to bandage his chest and stomach produced; Ahiru wished fervently that she could do something to help, something to comfort him, but she didn’t know what. Edel had had her rub some ointment on him that was supposed to ease pain, but there was clearly only so much it could do.

They checked him for broken bones after that; his side was badly bruised in one spot and Ahiru feared that he’d broken a rib, but Edel assured her that he hadn’t. He had sore spots in other places too that he groaned about – Siegfried said that he’d fallen off his horse – but luckily nothing had been broken, only more bruises. They tended to some other minor cuts and scrapes and gave him medicine to swallow down that would help him sleep and reduce the pain further. Fakir mumbled something unintelligible and then finally drifted away, his breathing relaxing and becoming deep and even.

“That does it, then.” Edel took a deep breath and let it out as she washed her hands again. “I… thank you for bringing him straight to me, instead of taking him all the way to the castle. It so often does make a difference, and I think that getting his wounds cleaned and treated here will help to prevent infection. Less exposure to things that could’ve gotten in them on the way, you understand.”

“Yes, that is what I thought.” Siegfried nodded. “Thank you, Lady Edel… your help is most invaluable. Fakir is fortunate to have such a talented witch in the family. Indeed, we are all fortunate to have someone so talented in this principality.”

“You flatter me, Your Highness.” Edel shook her head. “I only do the best I can, as all of us do.”

“I daresay your worst would still be better than some people’s middling efforts.” Siegfried tried to smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Again, I thank you – and is there anything I may do for you while I am here, to repay you?”

“That will not be necessary.” Edel dried her hands on a clean cloth. “Your Highness may return to the castle now, if that is your bent – I do not wish to keep you overlong from any pressing business you may have.”

“Yes, you’re right, I suppose I should go.” Siegfried sighed. “Duty would have me stay at my friend’s bedside, but I know it would do nothing to help him, loathe as I am to cast aside my pride and admit that.” He laughed ruefully. “Besides, I must assure my princess of my safety, and see to my other knights, and other duties besides.” He bowed to Edel. “I leave Fakir’s care in your capable hands, then – farewell, and thank you again for all you do and all you have done.”

Ahiru didn’t bother to listen to whatever Edel said as she replied to the prince and walked him and his knights to the front door. She instead sank into a nearby chair, feeling like her legs were on the verge of giving out. She glanced over at Fakir, bandaged and sleeping, and this time she let the tears fall freely down her cheeks. A sob threatened to escape her, so she pressed her now-clean hands to her mouth to muffle it.

She was so wrapped up in trying to stop crying that she didn’t hear Edel’s footsteps coming back down the hallway. “Ahiru?” She looked up to see Edel standing in the doorway. “Oh, Ahiru.” She walked over and took Ahiru’s hands, pulling her up. “He’ll be fine, the wounds themselves aren’t life-threatening and we’ll take good care to ensure there’s no infection. He’s safe now.”

“I… I…” Ahiru gulped. “S-sorry… I’m sorry… it’s selfish of me to cry…”

“Selfish?” Edel’s brow knit as she led Ahiru out of the room and closed the door over. “How is it selfish to feel pain over a friend being injured?”

“Th-that’s just it, I… he’s…” Ahiru hiccupped. “He’s my friend, yeah, but we don’t know each other that well yet, and meanwhile he’s your nephew and _you’re_ having to comfort _me_ , it should be the other way around, I’m so _stupid_ …”

“Shhh, no, no you’re not.” Edel embraced Ahiru, and softly stroked her hair. “We simply express our emotions differently, is all. And besides, I have more experience with tending to the wounded, whereas this was a great shock to you. You’ve never seen that much of someone else’s blood before, have you?”

Ahiru shook her head. “N-no…”

“I thought as much. And you haven’t seen any wounds, and I haven’t been able to train you enough on how they look and what to look for, so you have a harder time telling apart a more grievous cut from a less dangerous one.” She pulled back and touched Ahiru’s cheek. “He will be fine, and in time you will grow more used to this, and be calmer, because you’ll know better what you’re seeing and how to treat it. And I am glad Fakir has in you a friend that cares so much – he has had precious few friends in his life, I daresay you will be good for him.”

“I…” Ahiru dashed at the tears on her cheeks, trying to hide the blush that was spreading over them. “Right now I just want to help him with this…”

“You have.” Edel brushed some of Ahiru’s hair behind her ear. “We’ve done all we can at this point. Right now he needs to rest; I’ll sit with him a while, and then you can do a shift later after we’ve eaten dinner. When he wakes up, one of us can explain to him about the bell in case he’s forgotten, and you and I can take turns holding on to the other one.” She wiped at her forehead with the back of her hand. “This will be so much easier with you to help; I’m glad you’re here.”

“M-me too.” Ahiru pulled a handkerchief from her pocket and wiped at her nose. “Wh-what should I do while you sit with him?”

“Try and relax if you can.” Edel patted Ahiru’s cheek. “Go read that letter from your friend or something. I’ll call you if I need you.”

“A-all right.”

Once back in her room Ahiru stripped off her work robe, carefully wrapping it up so that none of the blood or ointments that had gotten on the front would rub off onto the other clothes in the hamper. They would launder everything tomorrow morning, or at least that had been the plan until Prince Siegfried and his knights had shown up with a wounded Fakir… and tea with Charon would have to be cancelled, obviously. He’d probably come over here and visit his son instead, once he knew what had happened. Ahiru’s stomach churned again; how awful for him. Fakir would survive his injuries, yes, but still. She couldn’t imagine how poor Charon would feel when he heard the news.

She opened up Lilie’s letter as Edel had suggested, but she had to read passages of it more than once to fully grasp them, so distracted was she by thoughts of what had happened today. It didn’t help that the letter was mostly overwrought gushing about how much she liked her suitor and her hopes that a proposal would be forthcoming once they reached the stage of their formal courtship – and the negotiations of both sets of parents – where it was appropriate. She knew she ought to be happy for Lilie that things were going well, that this was something important in her friend’s life, but when another friend was lying wounded in the next room over it was hard to care about chaperoned teas and parties and walks through the park. She had to remind herself that they weren’t trivial things to Lilie, and set the letter aside to answer it when she’d calmed down.

The afternoon dragged on after that; she tried what she could to distract herself, but nothing worked. She gave up on her book from Mr. Katz a page into the latest chapter, and she failed to absorb anything from the others she attempted to read as well. A knitting project she’d begun last week tempted her, but she found that her hands shook too much and so she abandoned it, leaving needles and yarn back atop her chest of drawers. Finally, Ahiru just flopped onto her bed and stared at the ceiling, waiting for it to get darker and dinner to arrive. It felt like forever before that happened and she heard the sound of the door next to hers opening as Edel left Fakir’s side and headed to the kitchen to prepare a spread for dinner. Ahiru waited a few minutes before following, and took a moment also to peek in at Fakir. He was asleep again, and Edel had drawn the blankets up to his chest to keep him warm. She’d heard Edel murmuring something to him earlier, so he’d woken up at some point – undoubtedly he’d been informed about the bell. It sat on a small table right beside the bed, within reach for his uninjured left hand, which set Ahiru’s mind enough at ease for her to finally trudge off to the kitchen.

Dinner itself was a somber, near-silent affair. Neither Ahiru nor Edel spoke much as they picked at the bread and cheese and sausages that Edel had brought out, and neither one wound up eating much in the end. They drank plenty of the herbal tea she’d brewed, though, needing its warmth and comfort. Edel had chosen a blend she’d made herself that had dried apple pieces and various spices in it, and Ahiru felt a small part of her tension drain with every sip. She reminded herself that Fakir’s injuries weren’t grievous enough to be life-threatening, that he hadn’t even needed stitches, and that he was in the best hands possible to keep infection away and recover fully.

She brought another cup with her when she went to his room after dinner, along with her knitting now that her hands felt steady enough to resume it. She took care to be extra quiet since he was still sleeping, but something must have woken him for she’d no sooner begun to move the needles than she heard a rustling from the bed. “Hey.” His voice sounded hoarse and croaky.

“Oh… Fakir…” Ahiru set her knitting down on her lap. “H-hi… how are you, do you need anything?”

“I…” He swallowed, and grimaced slightly. “Some… some water would be nice…”

“Of course!” She scrambled to her feet and hurried over to another small table, where a pitcher of water and a cup sat. Edel had filled the pitcher after dinner, just before leaving Ahiru alone with Fakir; she poured some into the cup and took it over to him. “Do – do you need help sitting up to drink it?”

“I… yeah… if you can…” He nodded slightly.

“Yeah, I can.” Ahiru moved to his side, and carefully propped him up just enough so that he could take the cup in his left hand and lift it to his lips to drink from. She waited until he drained it completely, and then gently eased him back down onto the pillows. “Is that all right? Do you need more?”

“No.” Fakir shook his head. “That’s fine. Thank you.”

“Y-you’re welcome, it’s nothing…” Ahiru moved back to her chair and sat down again. “I – I’ll be really quiet, I promise, so go ahead and go back to sleep… but I’ll be here if you need anything else, okay?”

“All right.” He let his breath out and closed his eyes. “Thank you, I…” He sighed. “Sorry to be a burden on you like this…”

“Wh-what? You’re not!” Ahiru shook her head, even though he wouldn’t see it. “This is my job and you’re my friend, I couldn’t just not do anything for you, don’t feel bad, that’s silly.”

A slight hint of color seemed to come back into his cheeks. “… Thanks.”

“You’re welcome. Now rest,” Ahiru said firmly.

“… Fine.” But he laughed slightly, and Ahiru felt some more of her tension melt away.

She stayed in there for about two more hours, more or less, until her eyes began to fall and Edel poked her head in to say that Fakir should probably have the lamps out so he could sleep better the rest of the night. Ahiru agreed that that was best, and doused the lamps before heading back to her own room, where she changed into nightclothes and climbed into her own bed.

She seemed to fall asleep nearly as soon as her head hit the pillow, despite the stresses of the day; how long she slept she didn’t know, but at some point she became dimly aware of voices speaking from nearby. Outside? In the next room? Or was she dreaming? It was so hard to tell.

“– realize that. I haven’t forgotten –”

“– allowed to. You are –”

“– keep my –”

“– will not be kind in the face of def –”

“– do you mean?”

“– fer the consequences.”

“… I understand.”

“– ching you.”

One of the voices sounded like Fakir’s. Wide awake suddenly, Ahiru sprang out of bed and reached for her robe and slippers. Once they were on she hastened to his room, opening the door so quickly that it creaked on its hinges a little. “Fakir?”

“Ahiru?” She couldn’t see his face, but she could hear the confusion in his voice. “What are you doing?”

“I heard…” She rubbed at her eyes. “I heard voices. It sounded like you were…” She blinked as her vision adjusted. “Like you were talking to someone…”

“No one’s here but me.” It was true – the room was occupied only by the two of them, she could see that now. “You must have been dreaming.”

“But I…” Ahiru frowned. “I thought I heard _your_ voice…”

“I could have talked in my sleep.” The bedsheets rustled. “I’ve been told I do that sometimes, especially if I’m having a bad dream.”

“It didn’t sound like a bad dream.” Ahiru walked further into the room, trying to better see the window. It was closed, just as Edel had left it earlier. “It sounded like a conversation.”

“Then you heard someone outside.” He sounded annoyed. “Or you really _were_ dreaming, and either way you only _thought_ it sounded like me. It was just your imagination.”

“I guess it could’ve been.” Ahiru glanced around the room again, still feeling vaguely unsettled. “Um, anyway… I’ll sit up with you until you fall asleep again.”

“Idiot, there’s no need to do th – ” Fakir paused. “… Sorry. I didn’t mean…”

“No, it’s okay.” Ahiru sat down in the chair. “I know you don’t mean it like that, remember?”

“… Hmph.” 

She couldn’t see his face well enough to be sure, but he was probably blushing, and she had to suppress a giggle. “Goodnight again, Fakir.”

“… Goodnight, Ahiru.”

She remained there until his breathing was once more deep and even; only then did she carefully tiptoe back to her own room and return to bed, where she slept undisturbed until morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Althaus: Means "dweller by or in the old house" from the German _alt_ "old" and _Haus_ "house".  
>  Teufel: From a nickname meaning "devil", given to a mischievous person or one who is devil-like.  
> Weiss: From Middle High German _wiz_ meaning "white". This was originally a nickname for a person with white hair or skin.  
>  Spellmeyer: The second element _meyer_ means "village headman". The first element is possibly from the Germanic _spielen_ meaning "to play, jest". Perhaps it referred to someone who was playing or acting as the village headman.
> 
> Additionally, korn is a German distilled liquor made from grain.


	12. Chapter 12

Edel brought Charon over first thing in the morning the day after Fakir was injured. Over tea and breakfast she gave him a full explanation of what had happened and all she knew, and assured him of Fakir’s safety and that she expected his recovery to go smoothly. Ahiru, sitting in awkward silence during the entire conversation, would never forget the way that Charon seemed at the end of it all to have aged several years in the space of less than an hour. He barely ate any food and let his tea go cold while he thanked Edel for her diligent care and for fetching him, before going on to say that while he’d tried to steel himself for things like this ever since Fakir entered the knighthood there really was no preparation for when it actually happened.

He came back a few times over the next week and a half, to check up on how Fakir was coming along in his recovery and also just to talk with him. About what Ahiru didn’t know, as she and Edel always gave them privacy, but she knew it was good for both of them to get to catch up and chat. Charon commented ruefully as he left one day that it was the most he’d gotten to talk to Fakir in months, busy as they both had been; it was just a shame that such a terrible thing had had to happen to give them that opportunity. Edel pointed out that at least they _did_ have it now, that things hadn’t gone worse during the bandits’ ambush, and Charon had simply nodded and murmured an agreement.

As for Fakir, his recovery went slowly but steadily. Care had to be taken to prevent infection, and he’d twisted his ankle when he’d fallen off the horse, so his mobility was limited. When they weren’t sitting with him Edel and Ahiru worked on keeping a steady supply of medicines for the treatment of his wounds, as well as doing the best they could with the orders from others that they had to fulfill. At night Ahiru stayed up studying books on her craft so that she wouldn’t fall too far behind, and she skipped her next lesson with Mr. Katz so that she could be of help to Edel and Fakir. She hadn’t had the chance to do the reading anyway with all that was going on, so delaying the resumption of sessions was really for the best in the end.

All in all it proved to be an exhausting week and a half, both physically and mentally. It became easier to deal with emotionally as Fakir gradually healed, but it didn’t lessen their workload any. Ahiru had no problem falling asleep every night because she wore herself out working so hard all day, and she suspected the same held true for Edel. Edel didn’t complain, which wasn’t surprising, but Ahiru could see the signs of exhaustion on her all the same. She only wished she could do more to help lighten their load, or at least that they’d get a break of some kind.

When Ahiru woke up on the second Wednesday after Fakir had been brought in, she almost thought it was still night, and sighed heavily to herself. Depending on what time it actually was it might not be worth it to try and go back to sleep, and she’d had trouble with that lately anyway. Normally she slept through the night till morning, but on those rare occasions of late that she woke up pre-dawn, her thoughts and worries and stress over what a busy day lay ahead of her and how Fakir would be kept her awake until it was time to really get up for the day. Often she ended up just getting up anyway, quietly washing her face and dressing herself and then sitting up reading about medicines and runes and sigils – for they’d just begun learning about those a couple days before the bandits attacked the knights – or trying to concentrate enough on the book from Mr. Katz to absorb the material and make notes. It didn’t look like she’d be able to make this Friday’s session either at this rate – she was still too swamped with everything else to carve out enough time to focus on the book, and when she did have some free moments her mind wandered because it was stuffed too full with all that weighed on it these days. It gave her twinges of regret on Mr. Katz’ behalf despite that the notes he’d sent back assured her that it was fine, and expressed his hope that Fakir recovered swiftly because that was the most important thing, and wished her and Edel well on top of it all.

She took a look at the little clock that rested on her bedside table out of both curiosity and resignation to another day with too many waking hours in it, and to her surprise it told her – after some squinting and rubbing of her eyes – that dawn had already come and gone and that it was actually almost time for her to rise and prepare herself for the day. Ahiru blinked several times in surprise, and then sat up so she could open the shutters. As soon as she did, she realized how she could have mistaken the hour for a much earlier one: no sun penetrated the pewter-colored clouds that blocked the sky, and a thick fog blanketed the world as far as she could see, making even the tall trees of the forest difficult to make out. The air itself smelled of impending rain, and Ahiru wondered if they should hurry and set out some receptacles for catching rainwater in, as it was useful for some spells.

She’d ask Edel about that at breakfast, she decided, feeling her stomach rumble. Closing her shutters again, she sprang out of bed and set about her morning routine with haste. They hadn’t discussed their plans for today over dinner last night, but she was sure they were going to be busy as ever, so she didn’t want to get behind and get a late start on it all. Ahiru washed her face, neatened her hair as best she could, and dressed in one of her warmest gowns before hurrying to the kitchen.

An odd mingling of smells greeted her when she got there: breakfast food and medicine. Edel had cooked some grain and heated some sausages as a nice treat for them on such a cold morning, something that was becoming more usual as the days grew chillier and chillier, and while it all softly simmered on the stove she packed various things into a pair of baskets on the table. Ahiru recognized the tall, slender bottles of cough syrup they’d brewed the other day, and the jars of vapor balms and bags of mixed herbs for steam inhalations. A few bottles of Nan Geiszler’s goat’s milk that had been infused with various things to give them medicinal effects completed the assortment, at least as far as Ahiru could see; some things had already been packed into a third basket and covered with a clean cloth.

“Good morning, Ahiru.” Edel looked up from her work as she heard the kitchen door open. “Go ahead and serve yourself some breakfast, there’s warm cereal and sausage, and I’ve laid out other things as well.” She gestured to the spread of jams, cold cuts, cheese, honey, and bread that sat on the table. “I just need to get these all sorted and packed before I start eating.”

“Deliveries today?” Ahiru peered at the contents of the basket Edel was currently filling before moving to serve herself food. She spooned some hot cereal into the bowl Edel had set out for her, and put it on her plate before taking a couple small sausages.

“Yes. And check-ups on a few people too.” Edel put a couple bottles of cough syrup into a basket, along with a bottle of medicinal milk. “I have enough to do that I might not make it back in time for lunch; you’ll have to prepare it for yourself and Fakir if that proves to be the case. Will that be all right with you?”

“Of course!” Ahiru nodded, even as she sat down and reached for the honey and a spoon to stir it into her tea with. “I don’t mind, I know how to cook some things, and I know you have to get all this stuff done, I understand, I just… I wish I could be more help.” She hung her head.

“Don’t be silly, Ahiru, you’re an immense help.” Edel rearranged some things, and then reached for a jar of vapor balm. “It would be so much more difficult if I were alone, trust me. You’ve done more than you know, and I’m grateful every minute of the day that you’re here. Try not to worry so much.”

“I can’t help it.” Ahiru sighed as she sprinkled some cinnamon and nutmeg on her cereal. “I feel bad that you’re having to go out by yourself and do all these visits and deliveries all alone and you might miss lunch and all I’m doing is sitting around back here, I can’t even get stuff brewed on my own yet so I’m no help at _all…_ ”

“That’s not true.” Edel frowned. “You may think of it as sitting around, but in truth you’re helping by being here for Fakir and doing things that he needs while he recovers from his wounds. You’re freeing me up to see all of our regular customers and take care of their needs. And I won’t be _missing_ lunch, I’ll just be a little late in having it. On top of that, you cannot expect yourself to progress faster than you should. You’re right where you ought to be as far as that goes – you’re moving ahead at a good pace in your apprenticeship, never fear that you’re behind. I know our lessons have fallen behind a bit because of everything happening, but once Fakir is healed we’ll be able to resume normality in that.”

“Oh.” Ahiru’s shoulders slumped a little as she stared down at the bread she was applying jam to. “I thought… I thought I wasn’t doing well enough or something, that I’m too slow a learner… I thought I was disappointing you.”

“Not at all.” Edel laid a cloth over the basket she’d just finished packing, and then moved on to the last one. “You’re doing admirably and I can’t ask for anything more. Learning witchcraft takes time, Ahiru – you’ll be training with me for a few more years yet before you’re a fully-fledged witch. And that’s not because you’re a poor learner or a disappointment or anything like that, it’s because of the nature of our profession and all that must be imparted to you. Try to relax and take everything one day at a time. There’s no need to rush.”

“Okay.” Ahiru swallowed down some tea, and the warmth that filled her had only partly to do with the beverage’s heat. “Thank you… I will!”

“Good.” Edel smiled. “Oh, and when you’re done, do you mind taking some breakfast to Fakir too? I would do it myself, but I need to get going once I’ve finished packing, as there are errands to be run on top of everything else.”

“No, of course I don’t mind!” Ahiru shook her head. “I – I’ll try to hurry, he’ll probably be up soon and really hungry…”

“Not too fast,” Edel warned her. “Don’t choke on your food or make yourself sick.”

“Ah, r-right…” Ahiru’s face flushed and she ducked her head as she took a spoonful of cereal. “S-sorry… you’re right…”

“It’s fine.” Edel returned her attention to the basket. “And you’ll be all right alone? Is there anything I need to leave here for you, or anything I should do before I go?”

“I don’t think so.” Ahiru swallowed a bite of sausage. “B-but, aren’t you going to eat breakfast too? You shouldn’t leave on an empty stomach, you’ll end up feeling awful after a while, especially if you’re hurrying around.”

“I…” Edel hesitated. “… No, you’re right, I should be taking better care of myself, I don’t know why I thought it would be better to rush out the door without eating.” She sighed and placed the last item in her third basket before draping a cloth over it. “Thank you, Ahiru… I’ve been run so ragged by everything that I’ve forgotten to take proper care of myself as well as of everyone else. And that’s not good for anyone, as I need to be in good shape to look after everyone.”

“Y-yeah, you do.” Ahiru nodded. “Is this the only meal you’ve skipped, or were going to skip?”

“It is, thankfully.” Edel moved to the stove and started serving herself cereal, sausage, and tea. “I’ve yet to work through dinner or lunch, and I’ve on all other mornings made sure to take some breakfast. Though I do admit that sometimes I ate lighter or more quickly than I should have.”

“Me too.” Ahiru took a sip of her tea. “It’s just been so stressful, you know? We have so much to do as it is, and we’ve been worried about Fakir, and just… it’s kind of overwhelming. I guess maybe we should try and slow down a bit, as much as we can, at least. Cause you’re right, we need to be okay ourselves to be able to make everyone else be okay too.”

“Indeed.” Edel sat down and began to add cold cuts, cheese, and bread to her plate. “Thank you again for reminding me of the importance of such things. Which is another reason I’m so glad you’re here: without you to do things like that, I likely would be in much worse shape and the quality of my work would suffer. Which I am loathe to subject others to, as it would have an ill effect on our patients. I cannot abide that.” She looked up from arranging cheese and meat on a slice of bread and smiled. “So do not feel so bad about yourself, Ahiru, for as you can see you help in more ways than you might initially realize.”

“I! I’m glad, that’s good!” Ahiru blushed and ducked her head again. “That does make me feel better…”

They resumed eating after that; Ahiru finished her breakfast first, and cleaned up as quickly as she could before piling some food onto a plate for Fakir. She knew now how he liked his tea too, so she prepared that and set it all onto a tray that she carefully carried down the hall after bidding Edel farewell and wishing her a good day. When she got to his room she contemplated knocking, but decided it was too risky when she had a tray in both hands. Luckily, the door was ajar, so she wouldn’t have to take the even riskier action of turning the knob. “Fakir? Are you awake?” she called out.

“Yeah.” She heard sheets rustling. “Are you coming in?”

“Y-yeah, I have breakfast for you, if you’re hungry.” Ahiru shifted the tray slightly. “Do you need me to wait a few minutes?”

“No, go ahead and come in.”

“Okay…”  She eased the door open the rest of the way. Fakir was sitting up, his hair unkempt around his shoulders; he set a book on his bedside table as she entered. “Oh… have you been awake long? Sorry you had to wait for breakfast…”

“No, it’s fine.” He shook his head. “I only just woke up about ten minutes ago. Don’t worry about it.”

“Oh, okay, I’m glad.” She walked over and carefully set the tray on his lap. He was healed enough now that he had a loose white muslin shirt on over his bandages. Most of the cuts he’d sustained in the attack had scabbed over already; only the large one on his chest and his impaled hand still needed to be bandaged, as they were taking the longest to mend. His bruises had mostly faded away too, and his ankle was getting better and easier to walk on (though he still took it slowly). “Is this okay? Do you think you’ll want more, or different stuff?”

Fakir shook his head. “This looks good. Thank you.” He picked up the spoon she’d provided, and winced only slightly before taking some cereal and lifting it to his lips.

“Is it good?” Ahiru watched him anxiously as he ate. “I – I tried to spice it the way you like…”

“… It’s perfect.” He seemed to go a little red. “Thank you.”

“Y-you’re welcome.” As she knew he hated being hovered over Ahiru returned briefly to her room to wash her face and brush her teeth, and sat down in a chair near him when she got back. “Um, so… how are you feeling?” she asked.

Fakir shrugged, and waited until he’d finished chewing a bite of sausage. “More or less the same as yesterday – still sore practically everywhere. But it’s getting better, so don’t worry too much,” he added. “I know things have improved even since a few days ago.”

“That’s good, I hope you’ll be able to get up and be back to normal again soon and go home. Not because I want you to leave, although I do, though not like that, I mean…” Ahiru blushed. “I – I just want you to be okay, a-and it must be hard on you to not move around freely and do stuff, I don’t mind taking care of you, but for your own sake I don’t want you to be in pain anymore… s-sorry, that all came out really bad at first…”

“It’s okay.” Fakir looked vaguely amused. “I understood what you meant.” He took a bite of bread that Ahiru had liberally spread with jam, just the way he liked it. “And yes, I would like to be able to walk around more without pain,” he added once he’d swallowed the bread. “And do more things for myself. I… haven’t been this dependant on people since I was a child.” He shifted, looking uncomfortable. “I don’t care for it.”

“Really?” Ahiru tilted her head. “Don’t you ever get sick? And you haven’t been hurt before as a knight?”

“I get sick sometimes, but it’s been years since it was anything more serious than a cold.” He sipped his honey-laden tea. “Which goes away quickly enough with good medicines like Edel makes. And yes, I’ve been injured before, but not like this.” His gaze dropped to the bandages criss-crossing his chest. “Charon said… he said it was a miracle I survived something like this.”

“Y-yeah, I was really scared when they brought you in,” Ahiru admitted, feeling a blush creep up her cheeks. “Especially that big one… I was really surprised when Edel said you didn’t need any stitching because it wasn’t deep enough. That was really lucky.”

“… Yeah. It was.” Fakir stared down at his food for a moment before spearing a slice of sausage with his fork and eating it. “Anyway, I’ll be glad to be able to do things on my own again, you’re right.”

“I don’t blame you. Oh, but…” Ahiru’s face heated up anew. “I – I’m sorry, I’ll be quiet and let you eat now…”

Fakir merely shrugged, as if to indicate that it was fine; Ahiru stayed silent nonetheless, to let him finish his meal undisturbed. Once he had, she took the tray away and replaced it with one that had a bowl of water, a cloth for washing his face, and a toothbrush with some of Edel’s home-brewed cleaning paste. She took the breakfast dishes to the kitchen while he tended to himself, and washed and dried them before heading back to his room.

She stopped by her own room first for her book from Mr. Katz, as well as her note-taking supplies; Fakir glanced up as she entered. “Ahiru? Could you… could you do me a favor?”

“Y-yeah, of course.” Ahiru set her things down on the chair and moved the tray away. “What do you need?”

“Could you open the window?” He ran his left hand through his hair. “I know it’s cold out, but I feel like some fresh air. If you don’t mind.”

“Not at all.” Ahiru shook her head and moved to the side of the bed. Fakir leaned out of her way so that she could reach the shutters, and she pushed them open. “Ah!”

“What is it?” Out of the corner of her eye she saw Fakir try to turn his body around to see what had startled her, only to stop, wincing, as it turned out to be too painful. “What’s wrong?”

“Oh… just that this bird was here… I didn’t expect that.” Ahiru took a deep breath to steady herself. On the sill outside, a crow or raven sat staring at her with red-rimmed eyes. It squawked at her, and then took off into the air. “Oh… it went away… I wonder what it was doing here…”

“Looking for food, no doubt.” Fakir shrugged. “You _do_ keep that bowl outside your window, so it must’ve wandered onto the wrong one, or hoped for more when it heard our voices in here.”

“That’s true.” Ahiru turned back around. “It just startled me, anyway, I wasn’t scared or anything… I mean, they’re kinda creepy, but I don’t find them really scary like Rue does. I – I mean, Princess Rue.”

“You don’t have to call her by her title, no one’s here to get affronted.” He shifted back as Ahiru stepped away. “What kind of bird was it? I couldn’t see.”

“A crow. Or a – a raven, I’m not sure… I can never tell cause they look so similar.” Ahiru scratched the back of her head, feeling sheepish. “Rue got really scared of them when they were hanging around while we did the spells and wards before the wedding, and Edel said she doesn’t find them scary like most people cause she’s seen them playing in snow, and I haven’t seen that myself but I believe her and that makes me feel less creeped out by them… what do you think?”

“… I don’t really have an opinion.” He shrugged again. “All I know is that they’re nuisances for the farmers. I can see how other people would dislike them, though, and I’m not fond of their calls either. They’re annoying.”

“Y-yeah, I get that.” Ahiru picked her things up and sat down in the chair. “I like other birds more, you know?” She paused. “Do – do _you_ like birds? I know you like that I feed them, but do you like them in and of themselves?”

“I do.” Fakir nodded. “I… fed them too when I lived around here.” He turned slightly red. “And there’s a stream in the woods… sometimes in the spring I’d go there and see ducks swimming by.”

“Oh, I love ducks!” Ahiru’s eyes lit up. “They’re my _favorite!_ ”

“… We have that in common, then.” His mouth turned up in a small smile, and Ahiru’s heart fluttered. “They were my favorite too as a child… I suppose they still are.” He shrugged. “I haven’t thought about it in years.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen that stream…” Ahiru thought hard about the bits of forest she’d explored so far. “Will you show me sometime? When you’re all better, that is.”

“Sure.” He took his book from the bedside table, as well as a ribbon. “Thanks for opening the window.”

“Y-you’re welcome. Oh, do you need help with that?” Ahiru asked when he winced as he tried to gather his hair together to tie it back. “I can do that for you if your hand hurts too much.”

“I…” Fakir hesitated, and she thought she saw the hint of a blush on his face. “If… if it wouldn’t be too much trouble… I could leave it untied too…”

“Don’t be silly, it’s no trouble at all, and if you leave it untied it’ll just get in your way while you’re reading.” Ahiru got up and walked over to the chest of drawers, where she retrieved the hair brush that sat atop it. “Here, just scoot forward on the bed a bit, and give me the ribbon.”

“All right…” Fakir obeyed her, moving himself so that she could sit comfortably on the bed behind him. Once she was seated he reached his hand back, and she took the ribbon and laid it in her lap. “Th-thanks…”

“You’re welcome, I don’t mind.” Ahiru pulled his hair back, privately marveling at how lovely it really was – soft and shiny, and such a deep, pure shade of black. “A-and I promise I won’t hurt you if I can help it… though it doesn’t look like you have any knots in your hair…”

“Heh.” He laughed slightly. “I hope not.”

“That I won’t hurt you, or that you don’t have any knots?” Ahiru began to carefully brush his hair. Part of her yearned to bury her nose in it, or simply comb her fingers through it; she shivered at the idea and then promptly repressed it. “I – I don’t know which one you mean.”

“The latter.”  He paused. “I… can’t imagine you doing anything to purposely hurt someone,” he added in a quieter voice.

“Oh no, I never would!” Ahiru shook her head, and continued to gently pull the brush over and through his hair. “I mean, everybody makes mistakes, but I really try not to be mean to anyone if I can help it… I don’t want to hurt anybody.” She frowned. “Not that that makes a difference if I accidentally pull too hard or something… so if I do, I’m sorry, I don’t mean to.”

“I know.”

He fell silent after that and so did she; neither one spoke again until Ahiru had finished brushing his hair and neatly tied the ribbon around it. “There!” She got up from the bed and moved around to look at him. “Is that okay? It looks fine…”

“Much better.” Fakir eased himself back until he was once more propped up on the pillows against the headboard. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome!” She beamed at him, and then replaced the brush on the chest and resumed her seat. Fakir had opened his book by the time she got herself settled again, and she let her eyes linger on him for only a brief moment before opening up her own book.

They read together in silence for the better part of the morning. Ahiru found that she was able to relax for the first time in a while, and could better concentrate on her reading and take some notes that she would organize before bed. She did get distracted a few times by stealing glances at Fakir, but luckily he never noticed, and something about his quiet presence was soothing to her frazzled nerves. Before she knew it her stomach was growling, indicating that it was time to prepare some lunch for the both of them. She assured him she’d try not to take too long, and didn’t hear all of whatever he said in reply as she hurried towards the kitchen.

A simple lunch would be best, she decided. Perhaps anticipating this situation, Edel had made plenty of soup yesterday, enough for leftovers for all three of them today. Ahiru set it on the stove to reheat, along with fresh water in the kettle, while she went about making sandwiches to go with the soup. She sliced bread and applied some mustard they’d just bought at market last week, and then piled on meat and cheese and some greens. She brewed some tisane with the water once it was hot enough, and as the herbal blend Edel had put together steeped she warmed the sandwiches up a bit and ladled soup into bowls. She arranged his portion on a tray, and with the fear of dropping it all twanging at her nerves she carried it slowly but surely out of the kitchen and back towards Fakir’s room.

He was still reading when she got back, but looked up and raised an eyebrow at her as he heard her footsteps. “Do you need help with that?”

“What? Oh, no, no, don’t get up!” Ahiru shook her head. “I’m fine, thank you… here you go, I hope it’s okay and that I didn’t take too long…” She set the tray carefully on his lap, and felt like she could breathe easier once she’d let go and saw that she’d miraculously managed to keep from sloshing even a single drop of tea.

“It’s fine.” He reached for the spoon, and then paused. “I mean… don’t worry about it taking so long, and… and it looks good.” He dropped his gaze to the food and busied himself with eating.

“Th-thanks, I’m glad, and you’re welcome, I hope you like it, I mean… all I had to do was reheat the soup, really, but I hope it all tastes okay anyway…” She fiddled with her necklace. “Um, but, a-anyway, I’m going to go get mine…”

She hurried out of the room and back to the kitchen, where she arranged her own food on another tray and carried it just as carefully back to his room. A space on the table they used for medical supplies had been cleared for this purpose, and she set the tray there before pulling up her chair and sitting down to enjoy her meal. She glanced over at Fakir to see that he was eating contentedly, and it relaxed her enough to dig in too and find that she had indeed done well.

“That book you were reading…” It was the first thing Fakir had said since she started eating, and it slightly startled Ahiru. “Was that for your tutoring?”

“Huh?” She glanced over at him. “Oh… yeah… I missed the last session and I’ll probably miss this week’s too, but I’m trying to get caught up so I can maybe go next week.”

“Mmmm.” Fakir took a spoonful of soup and swallowed it down. “And you take notes on them?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “Mr. Katz has me read a few chapters every week and make notes on each one as I go, writing down my thoughts and my reactions, and then we discuss them when I go to his house and then he assigns me more chapters. We’ve made it through one book already, and now we’re doing another one.” She took a sip of tea. “Why do you ask? N-not that I mind, I’m just curious…”

“Well…” Fakir stirred his soup around, not looking at her. “I was… I was thinking of maybe getting him to tutor me too. It’s been a while since I’ve been able to read any books, and it might be good to learn something about them.”

“Really?” Ahiru’s eyes widened. “That – that would be – I mean – I think that would be great for you, not because I think you need to learn stuff, you seem really smart already, but just… just cause Mr. Katz is a really good teacher and the lessons are fun and I’ve really liked the books he’s picked out. Maybe you can go with me and talk to him sometime when you’re better. Although you don’t really have to go with _me,_ you could go by yourself once you’re back at the… oh, wait.” She frowned. “Will – will you really have time once you’re healed and back to being a knight? You talked about not having time to read for pleasure, so how could you get tutored on top of everything you have to do at the palace?”

“I don’t… that is… I think I’ll have the time. Plenty of it.” He stared at the wall. “You see, I don’t… I don’t think I’ll be a knight anymore, even after my wounds heal. So that’ll give me time.”

“Wh- _what?_ ” Her spoon slipped through her fingers and dropped onto the tray with a loud clatter. “Why… why wouldn’t you be a knight anymore?”

“Because of this.” He turned to look at her, and held up his bandaged right hand. “Who can say what permanent damage has been done? I doubt I or anyone else will trust me with a sword any longer, especially in extended combat. It’s likely that this has made me a liability to Siegfried now, rather than an asset.” His gaze dropped back down to his food. “I can read, and write, and maybe even help Charon at the forge a bit. Civilian things. But I don’t think I’ll be good for fighting anymore.”

“W-well, there’s nothing wrong with being a civilian!” Ahiru took a bite of her sandwich and hastily chewed and swallowed it down. “There’s still lots of stuff you can do, you know. Like you said, you can help out at the forge, maybe you can follow in his footsteps after all. Or you could use your reading and writing skills for something, or… who knows? Your future is full of possibilities!”

“… Yes. I suppose it is.” Fakir stared down at the unfinished meal for a moment, and then picked up his sandwich and resumed eating.

They spoke little after that, instead focusing on their food. Ahiru again provided him with things to clean his face and teeth and took his tray back to the kitchen after she’d done the same in her room, but instead of washing everything right away she left it there and scrubbed her hands thoroughly before returning.  Once back in his room she removed the tray from his lap and then took out some fresh bandages and liniment from the medicine cabinet. “Okay, um… take your shirt off now, it’s time to change your bandages…” She really needed to not blush at this; it was medical care, she had no business getting embarrassed about seeing him shirtless under these circumstances. Just something else to get used to as she learned her craft, she supposed.

“Hmph.” Fakir made a noncommittal grunt as he began to undo the buttons. He needed Ahiru’s help to slip it off both shoulders, and once he’d gotten his arms all the way out she laid it aside on the bed. He sucked his breath in sharply as she carefully peeled the bandage away from his skin – for some of the pain-relieving ointment had made the cloth stick a little to the hair on his chest and stomach – but then let it out slowly and breathed more normally once it was off.

“There.” Ahiru let her breath out too, just as he did. “Now I’ll just…” She tossed the bandages into a nearby hamper; she and Edel would clean and sterilize them at a later date. A careful once-over of the wound revealed that it hadn’t reopened and didn’t look infected, and in fact appeared to be healing normally. Ahiru nodded to herself with satisfaction. “Okay good… it looks good. I just need to clean you off, and then I’ll put on some liniment and the new bandages. Sorry it kind of hurt to take those off…”

“It’s fine.” Fakir shook his head. “It can’t helped, after all. And it’s not like you were yanking them off.”

“Never!” Ahiru shook her head, her eyes wide, even as she wet a cloth and began to wipe his chest and stomach with it to remove the traces of ointment. “I – I feel bad enough about this as it is…”

“Why should you feel bad?” He shifted slightly. “This wasn’t your fault.”

“Well… maybe not, but in a way…” She pressed her lips together. “It was my coach that they attacked in the first place and you killed at least one bandit that I saw, and then they came after you again, so…”

“Idiot. That doesn’t make it your fault.” Ahiru looked up to see Fakir shake his head at her. “They _chose_ to attack your coach because they were low-life criminals, not because of anything you or anyone else in it did, and they also made the decision on their own to seek revenge against us. My wounds have nothing to do with you – it was mere chance that you happened to be on that exact coach. I did my duty as a knight and I don’t regret anything.”

“But… but now you can’t be a knight anymore…” Ahiru’s lower lip wobbled a little as she put aside the damp cloth and fetched a fresh one to dry his skin with. “Doesn’t that bother you?”

“… I honestly don’t know.” Fakir’s gaze flickered away, to some point behind her. “I’ve… it was important to me to be one, I won’t deny it. But I’ve never felt like a very good one. Maybe it’s better I resign now, and have time for spending with family. After all, I… Charon isn’t getting any younger, and I don’t want regrets later.”

“He’s not _that_ old.” Ahiru made sure she’d dried all of him before putting the cloth aside with the other one and washing her hands again. “Is he?”

“Not as old as some, no,” Fakir admitted. “But death, it… it doesn’t only strike the elderly. There may not be as much time for anyone as they or those around them assume.”

“That’s true.” Ahiru unscrewed the lid of the liniment jar. “I mean, look at this, look at what happened to you. If you hadn’t been really lucky, you might have died, and you’re not old at all. So I get why you want to stop fighting and have time to spend with your father, and Edel, and do stuff you haven’t gotten a chance to do till now.”

“Yes, exactly.” He straightened his posture slightly as Ahiru began to apply the liniment. “Who knows how much time any of us have? Like I said, I don’t want to have regrets later.”

“Yeah, I don’t blame you.” Having finished the application, Ahiru wiped her hands on a cloth before resealing the jar. “Um, anyway, though… before I put on the bandages, do you want any more of that anti-pain ointment on this time?”

“No, I think I’ll be fine with just the oral medicine.” Fakir shook his head. “Thank you, though.”

“O-okay, if you’re sure…” Ahiru went over to the washbasin and started washing her hands once more. “Although that stuff does make you sleepy…”

“I don’t really care. It’ll help the healing process anyway to sleep more, right?”

“Well, that’s true.” Ahiru dried her hands and then moved back to Fakir’s side. “Okay, I’ll put the new bandages on now, then.”

She carefully wrapped the bandages around him as Edel had shown her, covering the wound completely and making it secure and snug without being too tight. The cut needed to breathe, after all, and overly tight bandages would be uncomfortable for Fakir anyway. Once she’d gotten that done she helped him back into his shirt, and while he buttoned it up she got out the antiseptic ointment for his hand.

Unwrapping the bandage there was easier than the last set, and she tossed it aside with the others before inspecting the wound. It hadn’t reopened either, which was very good, and lacked any signs of infection. Just to be sure, though, she applied both antiseptic ointment and the liniment she’d put on the large slash, and after making sure he didn’t mind she added some of the anti-pain ointment as well before re-bandaging it.

“Is there anything else you need?” Ahiru asked as she finished washing her hands yet again. “Do you feel okay?”

“I feel fine, thanks. A bit cold, though, maybe.” He glanced over his shoulder. “If you just close the window again, I don’t need anything else. Well, that and some of that medicine.”

“Sure!” Ahiru put down the cloth she’d been drying her hands on, and hurried over to the window to close the shutters. “Do you need any more blankets to warm up with? Or fresh tea?”

“No.” He shook his head as she opened a bottle and poured out some of the pain medication for him. “I’m fine. Thanks.” He drank the medicine, and then settled himself down against the pillows.

“Y-you’re welcome!” Ahiru smiled. “W-well, if you’re okay, then I’m going to go finish cleaning up, and wash our lunch dishes too… I’ll be back after that, though!”

“All right.” He picked up his book again and opened it up to where he’d left off before their meal.

Ahiru put away the medicines she’d used on his wounds, and then picked up her lunch tray and carried it back to the kitchen. As she had a double set of dishes to wash on top of what she’d used to prepare the food it all it took her a while, and as she scrubbed she thought about what Fakir had told her earlier. Leaving the knights for good? She couldn’t deny that the idea produced some relief in her – seeing him carried in that day, all covered in blood and barely conscious, had been terrifying. And she remembered well how badly it had affected poor Charon, and though Edel hid it she knew it had disturbed her too. What Charon had said was true: there really _was_ no preparation for such things actually happening, no matter how hard you tried. The thought of this or something even worse happening to Fakir again frightened her, not just for his sake but for those around him who loved him. Edel had already lost so many family members, it seemed awful to have her deprived of a nephew as well, and Charon viewed Fakir as his own son, regardless of a lack of shared blood. How terrible would it be for him to bury him? It was meant to be the other way around, everyone knew that. No, it was better for Fakir to find a new line of work now, while he was still young and healthy, and live a long, long life.

Her thoughts after that drifted to what she wanted to do after she finished with the dishes. She’d had her fill of reading this morning and didn’t think she could properly concentrate right now, not after all they’d discussed. Maybe some more knitting? She _did_ want to finish that project soon. Ahiru nodded to herself as she carefully dried a soup bowl. Yes. She’d go to her room first and get her needles and yarn, and knit while she sat with Fakir. And she could talk while she was doing it, so if he got bored with his book and wanted to chat with her it wouldn’t disrupt what she was working on.

As it turned out, however, conversation wasn’t on the menu – when she got back to his room she found that Fakir had fallen asleep already. He’d drawn the covers up over himself and his book lay open on his chest, his breathing deep and even. She took a minute to admire him before walking to his side and carefully taking the book out from under his hand. To her relief he didn’t stir or waken, and she marked his place with the bookmark he’d been using before seating herself and beginning to knit. Edel returned home a half hour or so later, and once she’d fed herself and changed took over from Ahiru, who gathered up her things and went to her own room. She lay down on her bed, and dozed until it was time for dinner.


	13. Chapter 13

Fakir continued to improve over the next week and a half. His ankle was soon fully mended, and he regained his normal mobility and the ability to do more things on his own. The bruises and sore spots faded as well, and all the cuts scabbed over and healed, leaving only scars behind. The pain in his hand was last and slowest to diminish, but as time passed he didn’t wince so much when doing ordinary things, and was able to take care of himself better and didn’t need constant tending. He remained in Edel’s house, however, as he was still contemplating his future and what he planned to do once he’d made a complete recovery.

His progression did a lot to ease Ahiru and Edel’s minds, but not terribly much to lighten their workload. Illnesses were still popping up all over Goldkrone at a steady rate, and with winter close on the horizon there was a need now for blessings and protections to keep houses and their residents protected from the worst that the weather could soon be unleashing upon them.

Yet Ahiru did manage to go see Mr. Katz on the last Friday of the month, and she felt excited over what lay ahead on the final day of November: the Harvest Festival. A celebration of all that the season had brought them, it would finish off autumn and welcome in winter with a grand party in the town center that culminated in a bonfire around which people would dance as per the ancient traditions.

When Ahiru woke up on the morning of the Festival, the first thing she did after yawning, stretching, and rubbing her eyes was to open her window. A trio of birds looked up from where they munched on the seed she’d left out the night before, and they chirped happily at her before returning to her meal. Ahiru smiled at them, and rested her arms on the sill to watch. The birds around here had gotten used to her by now, and weren’t frightened at all by seeing her open her window. In fact, they rather seemed to _like_ her, which gave her no small amount of joy.

She watched them for a few minutes more before reluctantly rising and beginning her usual routine to ready herself for the day. She washed her face, pinned her hair up in a simple braided bun, and chose a pretty dress that would suit the Festival, in her opinion: a yellow one adorned with orange ribbons at the cuffs of the three-quarter sleeves and at the high waist, mimicking a sash (she was grateful she didn’t have to tie one herself, as she’d never quite gotten the hang of it and had always had to rely on others). She’d braided yellow ribbons into her hair as well, and finished the ensemble off with her mother’s necklace. And even though she typically didn’t think much of her own looks, Ahiru nevertheless had to admire herself in the mirror before she left for the breakfast. The dress was just so lovely, and the colors were perfect for autumn, and she liked what she’d done with her hair and the ribbons.

Only Fakir was in the kitchen when she got there, glancing at the newspaper in between bites of food. Ahiru’s heart fluttered a little as she saw him; she still wasn’t quite used to having him there every day, eating breakfast with them. She secretly liked it, though, and wished it could last. “M-morning, Fakir.”

“Morning.” Fakir looked up at her as she walked in, and seemed to need a moment to gather his thoughts before speaking again. “… Oh, Edel’s eaten already, she said to meet her in the workroom when you’re done.” He looked back down at the paper. “She told me to tell you that when you got here.”

“That makes sense.” Ahiru poured herself some tea and spooned hot grain cereal into a bowl. “I – I wish I’d known she was going to do that, though, or I would’ve tried to get up earlier too…”

“Don’t worry about it.” The paper rustled as Fakir turned a page. “If she’d meant for you to do that, she would’ve told you. I doubt she wants you to feel bad.”

“I – I know, I just… I can’t help it.” Ahiru sat down and began to sweeten her tea with the honey Edel had provided. “It just feels like we have a lot left to do, you know?”

“Mmmm.” Fakir made a noncommittal noise as he took a sip of his tea.

Ahiru opened her mouth to say something else, but then changed her mind and closed it. The thought lingered in her mind as she stirred spices and honey into her cereal, though, and even while she spread butter and jam on her warmed bread. Finally, as she took a few slices of cheese and sausage, she could bear it no longer – it had to come out. “Um, Fakir?”

“Yeah?” He didn’t look up from the newspaper.

“I – I was wondering… um… are you, um, are you going to…” She twisted her napkin in her lap. “Are you going to go to the Festival later?”

“Hmmm?” Now he did look up, his expression one of mild bemusement. “I’m not sure.”

“Do you want to?” She fidgeted slightly in her chair. “Cause if you do, you could come with me a-and Edel, and we could all have fun there, we could eat stuff and watch things and walk around and you don’t _have_ to come, of course, but I think it’d be really fun and it’d probably be good for you to get out of the house and get some fresh air after being cooped up in here so long, you know?”

“I… hmmm.” Fakir shrugged. “I really don’t know… I’ll have to think about it. I haven’t been to one in a long time, not since I was a child.”

“Really?” Ahiru’s eyes widened. “Th-then you really should go! N-not that you have to, or that I’d try to make you or anything, b-but just think about it, you can see how stuff has changed since then, and try all the new things, a-and have fun, a-and you can tell me about what you remember from when you last went to one, and… and I just think it’d be really fun, and I’d feel sad if we left you all alone in the house while we went out and did all that.”

“Well, I wouldn’t object to that or be hurt if you did, but…” Fakir shrugged again. “What the hell. I suppose I might as well go.”

“Oh, yay!” Ahiru’s face lit up and she beamed at him. “I – I’m so glad, it’ll be so fun to have you there too!”

The corners of his mouth lifted in a small smile, and Ahiru’s heart fluttered again. “I reserve the right to complain if I end up hating it, though.”

“Th-that’s okay, but I don’t think you will! I think we’ll have lots of fun tonight!” Ahiru was so excited that she couldn’t help swinging her legs, and she felt her foot brush against Fakir’s calf. “Oh! Oh no, I kicked you, I’m so sorry!”

“Hmph. Don’t worry about it, it didn’t hurt.” He returned his attention to the paper, signaling that the conversation was over. Ahiru didn’t mind, though, as she knew she needed to hurry up and finish breakfast and then go meet Edel in the workroom. She ate quickly but carefully, and was soon full.

Fakir volunteered to clean her breakfast dishes to save time for her, as he knew she felt bad about not getting up earlier, and after some protesting Ahiru accepted the favor and thanked him profusely before rushing out and heading straight to where Edel waited. When she got to the workroom she found Edel hard at work labeling jars and tying ribbons around them, and there were several more left undone, along with piles of small tins that needed to be stored in little pouches.

“Edel! Guess what?” Ahiru practically skidded in, and Edel looked up from the delicate bow she’d just finished tying around a sealed and labeled jar. “I asked Fakir if he wanted to come to the Harvest Festival with us tonight, and he wasn’t sure at first but then he said yes, so he’ll definitely be coming with us!”

“Really?” Edel frowned. “I’d assumed he was going to stay home, I know he’s never gone on his own to one, not since he was small…”

“Huh?” Ahiru’s face fell. “Do – do you not want him to go with us? Why?”

“It’s not that.” Edel shook her head. “I was just thinking that… well, I’d planned on having us both run the stall tonight and I figured we’d close up early so you could see some of what the Festival has to offer.”

“Oh yeah… the stall…” Ahiru’s heart sank. How had she forgotten that the packaged items in here were meant to be sold at a Festival stall, and that they weren’t just going for fun? “I – I’m sorry… I didn’t think about that…”

“And it seems rather unkind to leave him to wander alone, especially if he thinks we’ll be going as a group,” Edel mused. “So instead I think I’ll run the stall by myself and close up at the time I normally do on other years, and you can walk around with Fakir. That seems better for you anyway, as you’ve never been before.”

“Wh-what?” Ahiru’s mouth fell open. “B-but – don’t you need my help to sell everything? And don’t you want to see all the stuff at the Festival too? That seems awfully hard on you, I’d feel bad…”

“Don’t.” Edel shook her head and laughed. “I’ve been to it every year without fail and seen everything there is to see, there’s little new to me anymore, and I’m well used to running the stall by now. Plus, if previous years are a good indicator, I’ll sell out of everything quickly enough and can close up early anyway and wander if I like. I want you to have fun and the full Festival experience your first time, and I want Fakir to enjoy himself as well, seeing as he hasn’t been in years and probably needs a good diversion after all he’s been through recently.”

“Y-yeah, that’s what I told him.” Ahiru moved closer to the table and took up a jar so she could label it. “I thought it’d be good for him to get outside after being cooped up for so long, and it’d be nice for him to see it all again and see what’s different since he was last there.”

“Indeed.” Edel handed Ahiru a ribbon to tie around the jar. They’d be selling bath salts, bath teas, body scrubs, and sampler tins of tea blends and candied rose petals. They made good Yule gifts, Edel had informed her, and people were more inclined to stay in on wintry nights and indulge themselves in hot, soothing baths and cups of tea to take the chill of the day off and relieve the aches of hard work, so they always sold well. “He should also be recovered enough to help set everything up, and as soon as that’s done you two can go off and have fun. I think it’ll be a lovely treat for you both.”

“M-me too.” Ahiru smiled to herself as she tied a ribbon into a bow around a jar. “I can’t wait…”

Once they finished packaging everything up, they loaded it into the cart they’d borrowed from Charon for the occasion. It would be hitched later on to Fakir’s horse – he’d volunteered it to save Edel the expense of borrowing one from a local stable, seeing as he wasn’t riding it anywhere lately anyway – and used to transport everything to where Edel’s stall would be set up. There were too many things for them to carry themselves, after all, so it simplified matters. After that they returned inside the house, where Edel had Ahiru read up on things from her current textbooks (at the moment she was learning about the concoction of those bath items, as well as various powders and perfumes) and reviewed them with her. The Harvest Festival didn’t start until late in the afternoon, so they had a bit of time in which to relax and go at a fairly unhurried pace. They ate a light lunch in anticipation of the wide variety of tempting foods available at the Festival, and then took some time to themselves before the hour to leave arrived. Ahiru chose to go to her room and work on her reading for Mr. Katz’ class, though her concentration was somewhat fragmented by her excitement over going to the Festival. And going with _Fakir,_ no less! She grabbed her duck pillow and giggled into it, hoping he wouldn’t hear her from his room next door. _Technically_ they were both going with Edel – she knew that. But she _also_ knew that they’d be on their own for most of their time there, so it felt almost like a date. It wasn’t really one, of course, and she was aware that she’d never have a real one with him; however, that didn’t mean it wouldn’t be fun to pretend for a little while, just this once.

At half past two in the afternoon they finally left. Fakir took the responsibility of guiding his horse along the path up to town, and Ahiru and Edel followed along beside him. He’d put on what Ahiru supposed were his nicest clothes, the same dark-hued ones she recognized from the Halloween wedding, and tied his hair back with a new black ribbon. He looked so handsome that it made her want to sigh, and she wished not for the first time that she could work up the courage to ask him to dance with her around the bonfire later tonight. Alas, she knew she never would and that he’d probably turn her down anyway. Oh well.

The town center was bustling with activity already when they got there, as countless other people were getting set up too as the opening of the Festival neared. Edel directed Fakir to where her stall was, and when they reached it he helped them unload the cart and arrange the jars and pouches exactly the way she wanted it.

“I think that’ll do it,” Edel said as she put up a small sign that listed the prices of the various items, and placed a box for money beneath the counter. “I just need you to take the horse and cart around to the temporary stables they’ve set up in the warehouses over on Spellmeyer Road, and then you’re free to wander around on your own after that.”

“All right.” Fakir nodded at her, and then looked down at Ahiru. “Do you want to wait here for me?”

“N-no, that’s okay, I’ll go with you!” Ahiru paused. “I – I mean, if that’s okay… it just seems easier to me if I go with you, and maybe help you, and then we can just go around by ourselves and you don’t have to come get me at a specific spot, you know?”

Fakir shrugged. “Either way is fine with me.” He set off down the street, and Ahiru hastened to keep up.

Once they got to Spellmeyer Road, a couple of men directed them to a warehouse that still had room for a horse and cart. Ahiru spared a glance at Althaus Books and Curios as they passed it; the shop’s shutters had been pulled shut, and all the windows were dark save for a lone one on the second floor. Autor’s, maybe? He didn’t seem the type to enjoy mingling with others at such an event, and would likely be rude to anyone he _did_ interact with. Still, she couldn’t help but find it sad that he was missing out on something so festive purely because he believed himself above it. Even if he _was_ a changeling she could see no reason to deprive yourself of a good time if it was something you’d otherwise enjoy.

“Do you know someone there?” Fakir’s voice broke into her thoughts, and Ahiru jumped a little.

“Huh? No… I mean yes… I mean… sort of…” She fiddled with her necklace. “The – the day you got hurt, Edel sent me to that shop to pick up some books she’d ordered, and I met the owner’s son, and he was kind of rude and weird, he thinks he’s a changeling for some reason but I don’t want to ask why cause _that_ seems rude too…”

“Oh, _him_.” Fakir snorted. “I think I know who you’re talking about. He always seems to turn up to loiter in the area whenever Rue appears in public. He’s never done anything, but we always shoo him away just in case. She doesn’t seem to have noticed he exists, so we’ve done our jobs well.” He paused. “Or… maybe I should say _they_ now, instead of we.”

“Well, you’re still technically a knight until you resign, right?” Ahiru glanced down at the street. “And if you helped, I think you get to say we, even after you do that. Assuming you still plan to, and it sounds like you are.”

“I still have to make a final decision, but at this point I more than likely am.” Their conversation came to a temporary halt as they reached the warehouse and were directed to where they could tie up the horse and store the cart. “As I was about to say before, I’m going to try and decide either way within the next few days, and then carry on with whatever choice I’ve made,” Fakir said once they could resume talking, after tying up the horse and storing the cart. “I want to move on in one direction or another, and soon, instead of being in limbo like this.”

“What are you going to do after you resign, if that’s what you choose?” Ahiru asked as they walked out of the warehouse. “Work at the forge with your father?”

“I might.” He shrugged. “I did enjoy it when I used to help him, it wouldn’t be a bad thing to do.”

“Would you move back in with him if you did that?” She took another glance at the bookshop, and saw that the light in the window had been doused. She didn’t see any sign of Autor in the street, however.

“I don’t know.” Fakir brushed a stray hair out of his eyes. “But I doubt it. There are no other bedrooms available in that house, now that Lysander’s taken up the one I used to have. Finding a place to live is something I have to take into consideration when I make my decision.”

“Y-yeah, that’s right, I remember Charon saying that… though, um, I’m sure Edel wouldn’t mind if you just kept staying in the room you’re in now.” Ahiru swallowed, feeling a slight blush creep into her cheeks. “That’d probably be really good for you, actually, since you’d be close to the forge, and you’d be near the forest again, and you wouldn’t have to worry about paying for anything just yet before you’ve found something steady.”

“… I’ll consider it.” Fakir shrugged again. “You’re right, it _would_ be convenient, but I have to think about if it’d be an imposition on Edel.”

“I – I’m sure it wouldn’t be!” Ahiru shook her head. “There’s plenty of rooms, and she’s your aunt, so I’m sure she’d be happy to have you stay with us while you figure things out. Don’t worry about it!”

“… I’ll try not to.” Fakir seemed to smile slightly. “And I’ll talk the possibility over with her before I make my choice.”

“Okay, good!” Ahiru smiled to herself, and there was a bit more bounce to her step than there had been a few minutes ago.

Stalls and small tents galore dominated the town center when they got back to it, and people were just beginning to trickle in and browse what the Festival had to offer. Ahiru could hear the shouts and laughter of children already, begging their parents to buy them this or that, or asking to go see something _right now_ , no they didn’t want to wait for whatever it was their parents wanted to do first because that was _boring_ , they wanted to see _their_ thing now. It was hard not to laugh at how insistent and plaintive they were.

“What do you want to do first?” Fakir asked as they hovered at the outer edges of it all.

“I – I don’t know.” Ahiru swallowed and fiddled with her necklace. “I was hoping we could just… walk around and see what we like and what grabs our attention, cause I don’t know what’s here and you might not really either if things have really changed or you don’t remember that well…” She glanced up at him. “Is – is that okay?”

“That’s fine.” Fakir shrugged. “I figured that would be best, but I wanted to ask in case there was something specific you had in mind.”

“Nope.” Ahiru shook her head. “I don’t know who’s going to be here selling stuff, aside from a few people I’ve seen at market who’ve told me they want to have stalls, and I don’t know what other things there are to do. They never had anything like this in the city.”

“Well, when I was little, my parents – and Charon too – took me to see puppet and pantomime shows designed for children.” Fakir led the way as they started to wade into the growing crowds. “I doubt that’d be of any interest to you, and they might not even have them still. I know the person in charge of the puppet shows was very old even back then.”

“I don’t like puppets, no.” Ahiru shuddered. “My guardian had a collection of antique marionettes, and they were kind of creepy.”

“Yes, I’ve seen some older ones that looked a bit weird.” Fakir paused to look around. “I don’t remember if I – ”

“Ahiru? Is that you?” Ahiru turned to see a familiar face hurrying towards them. “Oh, it is! How good to see you!”

“Oh! Anne-Erina, hi!” Ahiru’s face lit up as Anne-Erina reached them, and the two girls hugged. “You’re still here in Goldkrone? How’ve you been?”

“I’ve been good, thank you. And yes, I am, though I hadn’t meant to stay as long as I’m going to.” She sighed. “My research took a bit longer than I’d planned, and now that winter’s almost here I might as well stay till the spring and avoid traveling in the snow.”

“Y-yeah, that makes sense.” Ahiru nodded. “It’s probably safer to stay here till then, and you might finish your writing by spring anyway.”

“That’s the plan. I…” Anne-Erina trailed off as her gaze went past Ahiru to Fakir. “Oh, who’s this? Are you with a – a friend? I’m sorry, I’m being so rude…”

“Oh! Oh no, me too!” Ahiru winced. “I – I’m so sorry!” She turned to Fakir. “Um, sorry, but – this is Anne-Erina, she was on the coach with me when I came here. Anne-Erina, this is Fakir, we’re friends, and he was also one of the knights who saved us from those bandits.”

“Ah, really? My apologies, sir, and my thanks.” Anne-Erina curtsied. “We owe you our lives, truly.”

“It was nothing.” Fakir shook his head. “We were only doing our duty to protect the people within the borders of Schwangau.”

Anne-Erina’s lips twitched slightly, as if she found Fakir’s stiff formality about the matter amusing. “Well, duty or not, it’s still appreciated. You all do good work, and it’s a pleasure to be able to thank you personally.” Her gaze returned to Ahiru. “How about you? Is your apprenticeship working out for you?”

“Yes!” Ahiru nodded. “I love it, it really suits me, and my teacher is great… I love living here and being a witch.”

“I’m glad to hear it.” She smiled. “It’s been good to catch up with you, hopefully we’ll see each other again before the spring. Sadly, I’ve got to run off now – I’m a bit late to meet someone. Sorry I can’t stay and chat more!”

“Oh, that’s okay!” Ahiru shook her head. “Go ahead and go, I don’t want to keep you!”

“Thank you, Ahiru.” She hugged her again, and then hurried off into the crowd.

“A friend of yours?” Fakir asked as they kept walking.

“Sort of. Though maybe an acquaintance. I don’t know.” Ahiru adjusted her handbag on her arm. “We talked a lot during the coach ride, so I guess that makes us friends, though we didn’t know each other beforehand and we hadn’t seen each other since till just now, so I don’t know if she’d consider _me_ a friend…”

“I’m sure she does.” Fakir glanced over at a couple of stalls nearby. “Hey, are you hungry?”

“Huh? Maybe, I didn’t eat that much at lunch cause I was so excited and also cause I knew we’d be eating lots of stuff here probably, so yeah, I could go for something.” Ahiru followed his gaze to the stalls. “A-are you thinking of getting something from those?”

“Yeah.” Fakir walked over to one that was selling hot, spiced beverages made with milk. Ahiru followed him, and they both ended up buying one.

“Mmmm, this is good.” Ahiru sighed happily as she swallowed some of it down. It felt so good to have something hot to drink on a crisp, cool afternoon like this, as the sun started to sink just a little. “I kind of want something to go with it, though.” She wandered over to a stall that sold freshly roasted nuts, seasoned with all kinds of things. “Oooh, these look good.”

“Yeah.” Fakir stepped up to stand beside her, and they browsed the selection. “I think I’ll get some too.”

They ended up each buying themselves a bag of mixed nuts seasoned with honey and various spices, and ate them as they walked along through the crowds. When they’d finished the nuts they stopped for some handmade candy, and munched on that while watching a man and a woman in jester costumes perform a juggling act for an audience comprised mostly of excitable children and their parents, though there were some equally awed adults as well. Ahiru clapped when the act was done, and dropped the paper napkin she’d been given at the candy stand; Fakir shared his with her so that she didn’t have to worry about getting food smeared on her pretty dress.

“Look!” Ahiru pointed at something a little ways away as they wandered off from the jugglers. “Aren’t those some of the knights?”

“Hmmm? Oh… yeah.” Fakir started walking in that direction, and Ahiru followed him to a fenced off square where two of the knights – one she didn’t recognize, along with the woman that had brought Fakir to the house that awful day – were engaged in a sparring match with wooden swords. “They do this every year – some of the knights volunteer to put on fencing demonstrations at the Festival as entertainment. And I guess also as a recruitment method.” He let out a dry laugh. “It works pretty well.”

“I can see why.” Ahiru moved closer. “They make it look really exciting and fun.” All the children gathered around, pressed up close to the fence and occasionally jostling each other for a better view, seemed awed and impressed. She smiled as they cheered when the lady knight with the curly hair disarmed her male opponent. “You’ve never been one of the ones that do it?”

“No.” Fakir shook his head. “I’ve never felt the desire, and I don’t know if I’d be all that comfortable with it anyway. To me, fighting with a sword is… well, it’s not a show. It’s life or death. I’ve always taken it very seriously. This feels like a performance designed to look, as you said, exciting and fun, when real knighthood isn’t anything of the sort.” He sighed. “We do get serious recruits from among the children who watch these shows, but there are also plenty of people not ready for the reality of knighthood who need to be weeded out and sent home. I remember I was one of a few who stuck around, my first year of training.”

“Oh. That makes sense.” Ahiru watched the two knights circle around each other, looking for an opening to strike. “Although, is it really that different from you wanting to be a knight cause of what you read in books, like Charon said?”

“Yes, it _is_ different.” Fakir’s expression changed to one of annoyance. “I romanticized it a bit because of stories I’d read, yes, but when I told my father – that is, the one I’m related to by blood – about my desire to be a knight, he sat me down and told me about what being a knight is actually like and what it really means to swear your life to prince and country. And I took him seriously – so seriously, in fact, that I would imagine the knights in the stories to be leading lives like those he said they would if they were real.”

“Oh. I…” Ahiru’s gaze dropped to the ground. “Um, I… sorry. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“… No, I’m sorry.” Fakir sighed, and when she turned to look at him saw remorse in his eyes. “I don’t know why I… no.” He shook his head. “That’s wrong, I _do_ know what’s bothering me, and I shouldn’t take it out on you.”

“I – I think I do too, maybe.” Ahiru stepped closer to him. “You’re feeling bad a-and sad about leaving the knights, aren’t you? Is that it?”

“… Yeah.” He took a breath and let it out. “It’s… hard to say goodbye to something that’s been a huge part of your life for so long – something that’s _been_ your life, period.” He lifted his right hand and rubbed the scar on the back of it. “I know at this point that I’m going to, more than likely. And I know it’s for the best. But it’s still difficult.”

“I – I understand.” Ahiru hesitated, and then laid a hand on his arm. “It’s okay. Sorry I asked you that and made you sadder about everything.”

“It’s fine. You didn’t.” Fakir shook his head. “It was a fair question, given how hypocritical I sounded. And maybe I even _am_ a bit of a hypocrite.” He laughed mirthlessly. “And anyway, you don’t need to walk on eggshells around me just because I sometimes have a hard time dealing with the reality of resigning as a knight. It’s my responsibility not to be a jerk to you over perfectly innocent questions.”

“Y-yeah, I guess.” Ahiru sighed. “I just don’t want to make you feel bad, is all. And it doesn’t matter if I wouldn’t ever try to,” she added as she saw him open his mouth. “If I _do_ make you feel bad with something I say, that’s still bad even if I didn’t mean to.”

“I know that,” Fakir said quietly. “But the fact is that it’s a lot easier to forgive slip-ups if it’s someone like you, who doesn’t have any internal malice and always apologizes right away.”

“O-oh, well, w-well, I guess I understand that.” Ahiru blushed and withdrew her hand, almost wanting to hide her face and thus the color seeping into her cheeks. “Th-that makes sense…”

“Yeah, so don’t worry about it so much, idiot.” Fakir seemed to have gone a little red in the face too. “Anyway, let’s move on… I’d really rather not be spotted.”

“Oh yeah, okay, sorry.” Ahiru followed him as he turned and walked off.

“It’s fine, no need to apologize.” Fakir slowed down to let her catch up, and they walked side by side through the throng. “Why should you be sorry for something you didn’t know? I was the one that walked over there in the first place, and I didn’t tell you till now that I’d decided I didn’t want them to see me.”

“That’s true, but… I don’t know, I guess I always feel like I should apologize for stuff.” Ahiru kicked at a pebble and missed. “I’ve kind of always been around people that made me feel like I should, I guess… so it’s hard not to apologize for everything now.”

Fakir frowned. “I hope that’s not your situation now. My aunt doesn’t make you feel like that, does she?”

“Oh no, not at all!” Ahiru shook her head. “Edel’s really nice and good to me, don’t worry, and nobody else here makes me feel like that either.”

“That’s good.” Fakir’s expression relaxed. “I couldn’t imagine her being like that anyway. She’s never made _me_ feel like that, at least, and I’d hate for that to change.”

“Oh no, don’t worry.” Ahiru smiled. “She’s still a great person like you grew up with. She’s not going to start being mean to you or making you feel like you have to apologize for everything.”

“That’s good.” They walked in silence for a moment, and then Fakir spoke again. “So… it was only the people you knew back in the city that did that to you?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “My guardian, and the people he hung around, and even kind of my friend Pike sometimes, cause she was always really hard on me. I know she meant well and wanted the best for me, but…” She looked down at the ground. “She didn’t really express it in the best way, and she can be rude about people poorer than she is, and about things and places that aren’t as expensive and fancy as she’s used to, I mean, she doesn’t _mean_ to be snooty, I don’t think she realizes it, but she still is. Sometimes… sometimes I miss hanging out with her and Lilie, but other times I’m glad to be away from all that.”

“I understand that.” Fakir glanced down at her. “Frankly, I don’t blame you.”

“Then… then you don’t think I’m a bad person for not missing my friends as much as I should?” Ahiru clutched at her handbag. “You don’t think that’s terrible?”

“Not at all. Hell – what definition of ‘should’ are you going by, anyway?” Fakir shrugged. “People should only be missed as much as they deserve, and that’s dependent on how they treated you before you parted from them. If your friends weren’t that nice to you, then you’re under no obligation to miss them a great deal. Don’t beat yourself up for not living up to someone else’s ridiculous standards – you’re allowed to feel whatever you feel based on what you experienced.”

“I know.” Ahiru sighed. “I know, I know you’re right. I’ve said stuff like that to other people before, I just… it’s always so hard to take my own advice. I guess I’m a hypocrite too.”

“Then you’re in good company, because so is everyone else who’s harder on themselves than they are on others, if that’s your criteria.” He moved his hand, and she almost thought he was going to reach for her, to give her shoulder a squeeze or something, but instead he merely brushed some hair away from his face.

“Oh yeah.” Ahiru couldn’t help but smile up at him. “Charon said that you’re like that too. So I guess that makes you a double hypocrite.”

“Idiot. There’s no such thing as a double hypocrite.” He was smiling, though, and Ahiru giggled.

“Yes, there is! Or maybe you’re the first one, so you _invented_ it.” She raised her eyebrows in an attempt to give him a challenging look. “Wh-what do you have to say to _that?_ ”

“I… that you’re the silly one.” He seemed to have lost his train of thought for a moment, but quickly recollected himself. “And that it’s just a made-up term that _you_ invented.”

“ _All_ terms are made up,” Ahiru said, lifting her index finger in a smug gesture, as though she was informing him of something he didn’t know. “How do you think they get invented in the first place?”

“That’s easy. They spring to life from the end of a wand held by a benevolent fairy in charge of such things.”

Ahiru looked up at him, and saw that though Fakir was keeping a straight face, there was just the slightest hint of amusement in his eyes. “You’re just making that up. _You’re_ silly.”

“No more so than you,” he countered.

“That’s not true! You’re _much_ – oh!” Ahiru’s eyes lit up. “Look, it’s Freya! A-and she’s selling flower crowns! I – sorry, but I have to get one and say hi!”

She hurried off in the direction of Freya’s stall, Fakir following close behind. She caught Freya’s eye as she drew near, and she smiled. “Oh, hello, Ahiru. Having a good time at the Festival?”

“Yes!” Ahiru beamed at her. “H-how are you? Are these selling really well?”

“Oh, yes.” Freya nodded. “I know it looks like there are a lot here, but I’ve already sold so many that my money box is quite heavy. Do you want one too?” She picked up one made of orange roses and yellow rosebuds. “I think this one would go really well with your dress!”

“Oooh, yes!” Ahiru fumbled in her handbag for a few coins. “How much is it?”

“Not much – yeah, that’ll do it.” Freya took the coins from her and put them in her money box – which indeed seemed to rattle with no small amount of money – and then handed her the crown. “There, let me see you in it.”

“Okay!” Ahiru lifted it and set it gently and carefully on her head. She adjusted it to make sure it wasn’t crooked, and moved the ribbons attached to the back so they’d flow freely behind her. “All right… there… does it look okay?”

“It looks beautiful on you.” Freya smiled. Her gaze moved to Fakir, who was standing just behind Ahiru. “Don’t you agree?”

“I… well… y-yeah, I – she looks…” Fakir had gone red again, and clearly wasn’t comfortable with being in the spotlight. “She looks… nice…”

“Ah!” Ahiru blushed. “Th-thank you, Fakir… oh, and…” She swallowed. “Um, s-sorry, but this is Freya, she’s my friend, she sells flowers in the market… and…” She touched Freya’s hand to draw her gaze back to her. “This is Fakir, my friend, and one of the knights.”

“Oh, I thought he’d looked familiar!” Freya nodded, and then glanced over at Fakir again. “It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Sir Fakir.”

“… Just Fakir is fine.” He’d scowled slightly, and Ahiru suppressed a giggle. “No need for formal titles.”

“Very well, then.” Freya nodded at him, and then turned back to Ahiru. “Anyway, I –”

“Excuse me, miss.” A pair of twins – one boy, one girl – came up to stand beside Ahiru and tapped on the counter of the stall. “How much are these?”

“Oh, you have more customers, I don’t want to keep you from them!” Ahiru squeezed Freya’s hand. “Bye, Freya! Have a good night!”

She moved away as Freya bid them goodbye and then turned her attention to the children; she and Fakir then took off again into the crowd. They wandered quietly for a while, just browsing what various other stalls had to offer and making the occasional bit of conversation about this or that thing that someone was selling. Neither one bought anything, however, until they came to the tent belonging to a local bookbinder, who had up for sale a large quantity of blank books ready to be filled in with whatever the purchaser desired. Fakir wound up buying a couple for himself, and Ahiru bought two as well: one for herself, and one for Edel. The bookbinder thanked them and placed their purchases in sturdy cloth sacks, and the two continued off into the festivities, satisfied with what they’d just acquired.

The next point of interest to grab their attention turned out to be not far away from the bookbinder’s tent. A local farm had set up a small, temporary paddock, inside which four children were riding ponies, while several other kids waited for their turn. The children’s parents crowded around the outside of the paddock, shouting encouragement and praise as needed.

“Awww, they look like they’re having fun.” Ahiru stood on her toes so she could see over a woman that nearly blocked her view. “Maybe a pony would be better for me too, if I ever ride again…”

“I don’t think you’re _that_ small,” Fakir said with a laugh.

“Maybe not, but it _feels_ like it.” Ahiru pouted. She usually didn’t mind being as little as she was, but it did make things harder sometimes. Like mounting a horse, for example. She couldn’t help but blush as she recalled how it had gone the one time she’d tried; the ride with Fakir that followed had been really fun, but the act of getting up onto the horse in the first place had been difficult and mortifying.

“Are you still interested in learning, come to that?” Fakir inquired. “I’m still willing to teach you, if you want to learn.”

“S-sure, but… only if you think you can put up with how bad I’ll be.” Ahiru scratched the back of her head and smiled sheepishly.

“Not a problem.” Fakir shrugged. “I don’t expect you to be an expert right away. Everyone has to start somewhere, after all.”

“True…”

They watched the children for a little while longer, enough to see the current group dismount and run back to their parents, disappointed that it was over, and a little bit of the next group’s ride too, before heading off again. By now the sun was definitely setting and in the encroaching twilight people were showing up out of the woodwork to light lamps and torches so that everyone could see what they were doing and where they were going. They tried to browse more stalls and tents and find other souvenirs to buy, but the smells coming from the food vendors soon proved to be too much of a distraction for their empty stomachs, and they only had to look at each and nod in agreement that it was time to go buy themselves a nice dinner.

“Do you think we should buy some for Edel too, and bring it back to her?” Ahiru asked as they stood in line. “I bet she’s really hungry by now too, especially if nobody brought her any snacks like we had.”

“That’s a good idea, actually.” Fakir glanced up at the menu, displayed on a sign attached to the top of the stall. “We can each pay for half, if that’s all right with you. I know you probably want to buy it yourself, but I want to at least chip in for my aunt’s dinner.”

“That’s fair.” Ahiru nodded. “Why don’t you pick out what we get her, then, as you know her better than I do?”

“All right.”

When they finally moved to the head of the line they made their orders, paid, and waited a few minutes for their food to be done. Fakir insisted on carrying Edel’s food along with his own, and Ahiru made only a few protests before giving in, knowing that she was afraid of dropping it on the ground anyway. By this point it was a little difficult to remember where Edel’s stall had been set up, but they found their bearings before long, and their food was more than hot enough still when they got to where she still sat behind the counter.

“Evening Fakir, Ahiru,” Edel greeted them as they walked up. “Are you having a good time?”

“Y-yeah, we are!” Ahiru beamed. “A-and we brought you dinner, are you hungry?”

“Indeed I am.” Gratitude shone in Edel’s eyes as she took the food from Fakir. “Thank you, you’re both lifesavers… I was about to ask one of my neighbors here to watch my stall before too much longer, but now I don’t have to.” She smiled. “Come, you two, there’s a couple spare chairs back here, why don’t you sit with me and eat?”

“Sounds good,” Fakir said.

Ahiru agreed, and she and Fakir moved to sit behind the stall with Edel and eat their nice hot food. They told her, between bites, about all they’d seen and done and bought so far, and she in turn told them about the various customers she’d had. Most of her stock was gone by now, just as she’d expected, and she didn’t think she’d have to stay open much longer at this rate. In fact, their meal was interrupted more than once by people coming up to buy things, further depleting Edel’s supply of items.

“I’ll probably come and join you before too much longer,” Edel said as they got up to throw their trash away and resume exploring the Festival. “Have fun in the meantime, and thank you again for dinner, it’s most appreciated.”

“You’re welcome! And you’re sure you don’t want dessert?” Ahiru asked.

“No, I’m good, thank you.” Edel smiled and shook her head. “You go ahead and get that for yourselves if you want, but I’m more than satisfied. If I feel like it by the time I close up, I’ll get some myself.”

“O-okay. Bye, then!” Ahiru waved goodbye to Edel, and then walked off with Fakir. “Um, do _you_ want dessert? I kind of feel like it…”

“Yeah, that sounds good to me too.” Fakir nodded. “Here – how about this?” His face lit up with a small, nostalgic smile as he led her over to a stand that sold dough fried in oil and dusted with powdered sugar and cinnamon. “I haven’t had this since… since I was here when I was small, actually.”

“Oooh, then this’ll be a special treat for you!” Ahiru’s mouth watered at the sight and smell of it. “And for me too, I’ve never had it…”

“I think you’ll like it.”

They got in line – Ahiru guessed from the length of it that it was a popular dessert – and waited their turn to order some and pay. Once they had, and Ahiru had taken her first bite, she concluded that it was popular for a very good reason. “Mmmm… this is so yummy…”

“It tastes like I remember.” Fakir sighed. “Maybe even better. I don’t know. It’s been a long time.”

“Well, I’m glad you were able to have it again.” Ahiru smiled up at him. “See, it’s really good that you came along after all, even if just for this!”

“Yeah.” He gave her a lopsided smile, and then they both resumed eating. He glanced at her when they’d finished, and handed her a couple of the thin paper napkins they’d been given. “Here – you have powdered sugar all over…” He gestured to his upper lip.

“Ah, thank you.” Ahiru took the napkins from him and wiped at her face where he’d indicated “A-and you do too, all over your mouth and all around it, it looks kind of like a white mustache.” She giggled.

“Ugh, I’d better take care of that, then.” Fakir grimaced and started wiping the sugar off. Ahiru tried not to stare – he really did have such lovely full lips, and she could feel her mouth watering again for a completely different reason from before. “Did I get it all?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “What about me? Did I get it all too?”

“Yeah.” He took the used napkins from her and tossed them, along with his own, into a nearby trash receptacle. “You want to move on now, or do you want something else to eat?”

Ahiru shook her head. “No, not right now… maybe later if I get hungry again, but I’m stuffed right now.” She patted her stomach and sighed. “It was really good, I’m glad I tried it.” She looked up at him through her long lashes. “A-are you happy you came with me? I mean, us, we’re technically with Edel even if she’s not right here right now… but, um, anyway, are you really having a good time?”

“I am.” Fakir nodded. “It’s… it’s been nice to see everything and remember how it used to be, to eat some of the same things I had back then. I’ve had fun.”

“Yay!” Ahiru beamed as they started walking again. “I’m really glad. Oh, and how different are things from how you remember?”

“A bit. Not that much, I don’t think.” Fakir shrugged. “You have to understand, it’s been years since I’ve been to one, so I don’t remember every detail perfectly… but a lot of the same things are here, the same foods, many of the same people… with differences, of course, given that some people have died in the interim or retired or just don’t want to put on shows or sell things anymore, and others have taken their place. But the feel of it is largely as I remember. Maybe with a bit more –”

He didn’t finish speaking, cutting himself off and grabbing her hand without warning. He pulled her aside so swiftly that she nearly lost her balance and fell into him, and when she steadied herself Ahiru saw why: a group of drunken revelers had come barreling through in their direction. They were too busy laughing raucously and imbibing more liquor to pay much attention to where they were going or who they were passing, so if Fakir hadn’t acted quickly they would’ve plowed right into her. “Ah… thanks.” She reached up with her free hand to make sure her flower crown hadn’t gotten knocked askew.

“It’s nothing. Are you all right?” Fakir leaned down a little to get a better look at her. “I didn’t pull you too hard, did I?”

“N-no, I’m fine.” She finished adjusting her crown. “I almost lost my balance but I didn’t, and anyway it would’ve been a lot better than getting crashed into by those people, I don’t know what would’ve happened to me.” She shuddered. “Thank you again.”

“I told you, it’s nothing.” He let go of her hand then, and Ahiru felt a flutter of disappointment in her stomach. Fakir’s hand was so big and warm, and it had felt really good to have him hold hers. Now that that warmth was gone, her skin felt almost… not itchy, precisely, but it definitely missed his touch. “Don’t worry about it.”

Ahiru opened her mouth to say something, but was interrupted as a familiar voice rang out from behind them. “Fakir! You didn’t tell me you were coming to the Festival. Or that you were going to bring a date.” The speaker laughed.

“I – what?” Fakir turned around, somehow managing to look mortified and irritated all at the same time. “Raetsel! This – this isn’t – it’s not a date, where did you get that – how did – I don’t –”

“It – it’s just me, Raetsel,” Ahiru said as Fakir continued to splutter, his face bright red. She stepped towards her. “See? It’s definitely not a date.”

“Oh, now…” Raetsel frowned, her eyes darting to Ahiru and then back to Fakir. “See here, Fakir, you’ve insulted the poor girl with your overly vehement denial.”

“N-no, I’m not –” Ahiru began, though it was a lie. Her giddy pretending that it really _was_ like a date had just collapsed under the weight of reality, and her stomach was in unhappy knots.

“I don’t mean it like that,” Fakir said, his voice softening. He turned to look at Ahiru, though he didn’t really look her in the eye. “I’m sorry, I didn’t – I didn’t find the idea horrifying or anything like that, I just – Raetsel tends to tease, and I…” His gaze fell to her feet. “I’m sorry. That came off badly.”

“It’s okay,” Ahiru told him, shaking her head. “I know you didn’t mean it in a bad way. A-and even if you did, I don’t blame you, it’s not like I’m… like I’m…” She swallowed.

“Oh, now, Ahiru, don’t,” Raetsel came over and put her arm around her. “I’m sorry, Ahiru, did my teasing bring up bad memories for you or something? I really need to learn to think before I say things.”

“N-no, it’s okay.” Ahiru made herself smile. “I’m okay. Thank you. A-and how are you, are you having fun?”

“I’m good, thank you.” Raetsel gave her a strange look, as if she knew she was trying desperately to change the subject and respected it even though she didn’t understand why. “I’ve just come from doing a little shopping, I might go have dinner now, I’m famished… have you two eaten yet? You’re welcome to join me if you have.”

“Oh, sorry, we ate already.” Ahiru shook her head. “We had dinner _and_ dessert, we just ate some fried dough. It was really good.”

Raetsel groaned. “ _Stop,_ you’re just making it worse.” She let out a dramatic sigh. “Well, if I’m not going to have company while feeding my face, I’ll let you two be – much as I’d love to talk more, I’m a bit wobbly on my feet here from hunger.” She looked over at Fakir. “You be nice to her, all right? Ahiru’s a sweet girl and doesn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of your sharp tongue. Especially since I can see somebody’s made her feel bad about herself in the past.” She gave Ahiru a hug with the arm she still had around her, and then let go and headed off. “And Ahiru, don’t let this grouch mistreat you, all right?”

Ahiru giggled despite herself. “I – I won’t!”

Fakir rolled his eyes. “Bye, Raetsel.”

“Bye, you two.” She waved before heading off into the crowd.

An awkward silence fell over them, and neither one broke it for several minutes. “Hey.” Fakir spoke up first, his voice full of hesitancy. “Are you upset with me for what happened back there?”

“N-no, not really, I just…” Ahiru pressed her lips together and glanced down at the ground, unable to meet his eyes. “I just… um…”

“It’s okay to just say you are, you know. And…” Fakir paused, still not looking at her either. “I really am sorry. I shouldn’t have reacted like that to her teasing, it was insulting to you.”

“It’s okay.” Ahiru reached a hand up to touch her necklace. “I understand… my friend Lilie was always like that too but worse, she’d tease me about _anything_ she thought she could embarrass me with, so I tried not to tell her much after a while if I didn’t think I could handle getting teased about it. She seemed to enjoy seeing me unhappy so she could try and comfort me, but she wasn’t any good at it… she kind of reveled in my misery.” She sighed. It wasn’t hard to imagine what Lilie would say about _this_ situation, and she felt intensely relieved that she was far away.

“Raetsel’s not quite that bad, but she _does_ enjoy embarrassing me for her own amusement.” Fakir sighed. “She’s always been like an older sister to me, ever since I was very young, and I guess that’s part of some sibling relationships. Don’t get me wrong, she’s an important person to me, but she does have her flaws and that’s one of them.” Out of the corner of her eye Ahiru saw him glance at her. “I think that’s why I overreacted without thinking – because I knew that was her aim and I didn’t want to see you become a target too. But I took it too far.” He sighed again. “I’m sorry.”

“Th-that’s okay!” Ahiru finally looked up at him, and her small smile reached her eyes this time. “I – I really wouldn’t want to be on the receiving end of more teasing, even if it’s not as bad as Lilie’s, so I appreciate that you wanted to look out for me. Thank you.”

“Don’t – don’t thank me for doing it the wrong way and hurting you, that’s –” His face turned red again. “You’re entitled to be mad at me for the way I did it.”

“I’m not, though. It’s okay.” Ahiru’s smile widened. “Let’s just forget about it, all right? I know you weren’t trying to be mean to me, just the opposite, and you apologized, so it’s okay. Really.”

Fakir hesitated, and then nodded. “All right.”

They walked along quietly for a while after that; Ahiru couldn’t tell what Fakir was thinking, but she felt lighter inside after their conversation. Fakir hadn’t really been horrified at the thought of her being his date, he just hadn’t wanted her to become a target of Raetsel’s teasing. And who knows, maybe the topic in itself was a sore point with him – she didn’t know their full history, after all, and until just now hadn’t even been aware that they knew each other at _all,_ much less that he considered her a sister. If she’d given him a hard time before about not being attached to anyone, or just teased him in general about the subject, no wonder he reacted so harshly. It was still disappointing to be reminded that she wasn’t really on a date with him, but the knowledge that the idea of being on one with her wasn’t offensive to Fakir mitigated it somewhat. He might not be interested in her, but at least he wasn’t repulsed by her, that was some consolation.

After browsing a few more shops and buying a couple items here and there they decided that it would be nice to have another hot drink, so they got in line at a stand selling hot apple cider. They’d only just taken their first sips when Edel appeared out of the crowd and waved at them. “There you two are.”

“Edel! Hi!” Ahiru waved with her free hand. “You got to close up?

“Yes.” She nodded. “A half hour ago, actually – I’ve just been wandering around since then.” She glanced down at their cups. “That smells wonderful… where did you get it?”

“Over there.” Fakir pointed to the stand.

“Excellent, thank you.” Edel nodded. “Would you be willing to wait here for me? I want to buy a cup for myself and one for Charon as well. I’ve also promised him some fried dough.” She laughed.

“Of course!” Ahiru looked up at Fakir. “Y-you don’t mind, do you?”

“Not at all.” Fakir took another sip of cider.

“All right then, thank you. I’ll be right back.”

Edel walked off in the direction of the cider stand, and in a few minutes’ time had returned with two steaming cups. The three then made their way to a fried dough stand, and picked up a couple orders before heading towards where Charon had a tent set up with some weapons, armor pieces, and assorted other forged items on sale.

“Ahhhh, Edel.” Charon’s wearied face lit up as they entered the tent. “Cider too? You’re a lifesaver.” He dug in his pocket. “How much will that be?”

“Leave it.” Edel shook her head. “This one’s on me.” She held out the cider, and Fakir handed him the fried dough they’d gotten him. Ahiru, meanwhile, handed Edel the other order of fried dough now that she had a free hand to hold it with. “I see you’ve sold a few more pieces since I left.”

“Mmmm.” Charon swallowed a large bite of fried dough, and washed it down with a gulp of cider. “Ah, yes, that hits the spot,” he sighed. “Sorry, anyway… yes. I probably brought a few too many items, even though they’ve been selling well, but…” He shrugged. “It’s been a good night, and I have a strong apprentice to help me out. At least, once he gets back.”

“You sent him on a break, right?” Edel tore a piece of dough off and popped it into her mouth.

“Yeah, close to two hours ago. He should be back soon, though, he’s never been unreliable about that, and he deserves some time to breathe and relax and enjoy the Festival. And maybe see that girl he’s sweet on.” He laughed. “Not that you heard that from me, mind.” He winked.

“My lips are sealed.” Edel took a sip of her cider. “Of course, I’m not the gossiping type anyway.”

“No, I know that. And naturally you can’t be, not in your line of work.” Charon ate some more, and then glanced over at Fakir and Ahiru as if seeing them for the first time. “Oh, hey Fakir. It’s nice to see you here. I don’t think I’ve seen you at one of these since I brought you myself. Having a good time?”

“Yeah.” Fakir nodded, and then drained the last of his cider. “It’s… nice to see it all again.”

“That’s good, that’s good.” He looked at Ahiru. “And you? I hope my son hasn’t been too boorish with you.” He chuckled.

“Oh no, not at all!” Out of the corner of her eye Ahiru could see Fakir turning red again. “He’s been really nice to me, we’ve been having such a good time together, don’t worry…”

“Glad to hear it.” The tent flap opened from behind them, and they all turned to see Lysander walking back in. “Ah, there you are – enjoy your break?”

“… Yeah.” Lysander looked around at everyone. “Hello…” He nodded to each of them as they greeted him in turn, and then walked over to Charon. “Do you want me to take over for a while?”

“Hmmm…” Charon considered it. “As nice as that sounds, I think I’ll stay a little longer, if only so we can get all packed up in time to watch the dancing round the bonfire. We missed it last year, and I’d like to see it this year. If you’re interested, that is.”

“I guess.” Lysander shrugged.

“We’ll leave you to get that done with, then.” Edel waved. “See you two at the dancing, then.”

Charon waved back. “See you. And take care.”

Ahiru and Fakir followed Edel out of the tent; a short walk away, something occurred to Ahiru. “Edel?”

“Yes?” Edel drained the last of her cider.

“Um, what’d you do with your box of money that you made from selling all that stuff?” Ahiru peered closely at her, as if expecting to see a box sticking out conspicuously somewhere. “You aren’t carrying it… is it safe to just leave it somewhere?”

“Oh, I didn’t leave it anywhere.” Edel shook her head. “Or should I say, I didn’t leave it _just_ anywhere. Ebine always lets me leave it at her shop after I’ve closed up, and it’ll be locked up safely in there with her; I’ll pick it up tomorrow, as usual.”

“Oh, okay.” Ahiru sipped some more cider; it had gone a bit cool by now, but it still tasted good, and she finished it off. “That’s good, I don’t want anyone to steal from you.”

“No, I wouldn’t either.” Edel glanced up at the sky, cloudless and studded with twinkling stars. “I’m grateful to Ebine for helping me in this way, it’s invaluable to me.” She yawned. “Oh, excuse me, it’s been a long day, and we’re well into evening now…”

“Do you want to go home?” Fakir asked.

“No, not just yet.” Edel shook her head. “I’d like to stay and see the dancing. You two can head home yourselves if you’d rather, I won’t force you to stay if you’re too tired.”

“I’m fine.” Fakir shrugged. “I shouldn’t think we’d be as worn out as you are, we haven’t been minding a store for hours.”

“Y-yeah, and you got up earlier than we did,” Ahiru spoke up. “I feel kind of bad about that, I wish I’d known so I could be up earlier and help more.”

“Ahiru, you helped plenty, don’t worry about it.” Edel brushed some powdered sugar off her sleeve. “Well, if you’re both all right with sticking around, let’s find something to do to occupy our time until the bonfire is lit.”

They roamed the Festival aimlessly for some time after that; they watched bits of various shows and looked at stalls, and Edel made a few purchases that she seemed happy with. But when a distant bell began to chime, they followed the crowds of people making for the very center of everything. In the jostling and slight confusion that ensued on their way there Fakir surreptitiously grabbed Ahiru’s hand to keep her from getting separated from him and Edel, and the effect on her was like swallowing down all of a fresh cup of hot cider at once.

People were more spread out when they got there, though it was still crowded, and at the heart of the space Ahiru could see an enormous pile of wood, stacked high enough for her to see even over the heads of some of the taller people in front of her. A safe distance away, but still close enough to be considered at the center of all, a small stage with two chairs on it had been set up. A hush fell over the crowd and Ahiru drew her breath in as Siegfried and Rue ascended it. Rue looked especially radiant, in a gown of red and orange and yellow, with a tiara of gold leaves circling her perfectly pinned up dark hair. She would have stared longer if her attention had not been distracted by a flash of light from somewhere over to her right that nearly had her seeing stars. Curious despite herself, Ahiru glanced over to see Autor at the front of the crowd, his glasses gleaming with reflected torch light. After what Fakir had told her earlier, she couldn’t be surprised at his presence.

“Good evening, citizens of Goldkrone!” Siegfried shouted to the mostly quiet crowd. “And a happy Harvest Festival to you all!” He smiled as they all cheered and yelled the same thing back to him, and wait for it to die down before speaking again. “As you all know, it is our tradition as per the ancient ways to dance around the sacred bonfire. The priestess has blessed this wood, and warded the space around it so the fire might be safely contained and do no harm to person or property. We shall bid farewell to autumn and welcome in winter, and our dancing shall be a prayer that we might be spared the worst of the season and come through once again to a glorious spring.

“Now, it is also tradition for me to hand out this Golden Apple to the couple whose dancing is most pleasing.” He held up an apple that shimmered faintly – or, at least, something apple _shaped_ that shimmered. “However, this year I wish to defer that honor to my beautiful princess.”

He handed Rue the golden apple as the crowd broke into applause; Ahiru glanced at Fakir, but couldn’t read his expression. Up on the little stage, Rue smiled out at the crowd. “Thank you, citizens of Goldkrone, and thank you also, my Prince.” She curtsied delicately to Siegfried before addressing everyone again. “Dance your best, for I shall be watching and searching for the best among you, but most of all dance for the benefit of all of us, for the benefit of this fair land.”

A group of knights then emerged in a circle around the pile of wood, all bearing torches. They carried them past the warding line, and used them to set the fire. Applause rang out again as the flames caught, and then the dancing truly began. Ahiru backed away, to avoid being pulled in, but to her relief it seemed that this was something where you needed to have a partner to participate in, and would be lacking that bizarre group dance from Halloween.

“It’s a sight to see, isn’t it?” Charon had come up to join them as they watched, and Ahiru jumped slightly at the sound of his voice. “I’m glad I didn’t miss it again this year.” He glanced over at Ahiru. “This is your first time seeing such a thing, isn’t it? What do you think?”

“It’s amazing…” Ahiru’s eyes darted from couple to couple. “I – I don’t know where I should be looking, everyone’s so good at it…”

“Aye, I have that problem too.” He laughed. “I took part in it myself a few times, when I was younger. Course, I wasn’t any good at it.”

“Really?” Ahiru looked at him with wide eyes. “Did you at least have fun?”

“Without a doubt. Except for the time I turned my ankle and trod rather forcefully on my partner’s foot. She wouldn’t speak to me for months after that.” He chuckled. “You ought to give it a shot sometime, see if you like it.”

“Oh no, I don’t think that’d be a good idea.” Ahiru shook her head. “I’m pretty bad at it, and I wouldn’t be able to find a partner, anyway.”

“Well, you don’t have one this year, but maybe next year.” His gaze strayed just past her, and then went to Edel. “Say, do you remember that one Festival, ten years ago it was maybe? When –”

He and Edel turned to reminiscing about past Festivals and dances, and Ahiru tuned them out as it wasn’t relevant to her. She glanced up at the stage to see that Rue and Siegfried were seated now, and Rue had the apple securely in her lap. “I wonder why they’re not dancing…”

“They will later.” Fakir spoke up from beside her. “The Prince traditionally dances the last dance of the night, after the awarding of the Golden Apple. In past years his partner has been a girl selected for him from among the noble families.” Something almost wistful seemed to flicker in his eyes. “This year, of course, it will be his wife – he only danced with an unattached partner before he himself was wed.”

“That makes sense.” Ahiru reached up to adjust her flower crown. “What’s the point of the apple thingy, anyway?”

“I think it dates back to some ancient tradition involving real apples; I can’t remember.” He shrugged. “People say it’s good luck to be awarded one, as it means that the love between the couple given it will last forever, but I can’t recall if that’s part of the original tradition or if it’s merely a legend that sprang up around the thing later.”

“Ooh, neat.” Ahiru watched a young man dip his partner. “Does it work?”

“I have no idea. I’ve never known anyone that…” Fakir trailed off, his eyes widening. “That…”

“What? What is it?” Ahiru asked. “What’s wrong, Fakir?” She followed his gaze to where he was staring, but saw nothing, just the flickering of the light beneath a streetlamp. Or had a shadow moved into the watching crowd? She couldn’t tell. “Um, I don’t see anything…”

“… No. It’s nothing.” Fakir let his breath out and shook his head. “I thought I saw… never mind.”

“Thought you saw what?” Ahiru frowned. “What did you think you saw? Tell me.”

“Nothing,” he repeated. “Just a trick of the light. I thought I saw someone I shouldn’t have.”

“You – you mean like a ghost or something?” Ahiru shuddered. “Th-that’s scary.”

“No, not like that,” he said again, his tone more reassuring. “Just someone who looked like them for a second in the firelight. Don’t worry about it.”

“Oh, okay.” Ahiru swallowed, and took another quick look at the spot Fakir had been staring at before returning her attention to the dancing couples.

“And as I was saying, I’ve never known anyone that actually won the apple.” Fakir continued their previous conversation as though nothing had happened. “Especially as I haven’t come here to see it in so many years.”

“Oh yeah…” Ahiru looked over at him. “So you never danced around the bonfire, I guess?”

“Actually, I did, just once.” The corner of his mouth lifted in a lopsided smile. “When I was younger, I didn’t quite understand that it was supposed to be for adults in romantic relationships, and I wanted very much to join in. So Charon and Raetsel danced with me a little before he put me back up on his shoulders so I could better watch everything.”

“Awww, that’s sweet of them!” Ahiru’s face broke into a smile. “Did you have fun doing that?”

“Yeah.” His smile turned wistful. “After the dancing was done, the Prince at the time – Siegfried’s father, before he passed away – came over to us. He couldn’t award us the Golden Apple, he explained, but he wanted to praise me on my dancing anyway. I think he found it sweet too, and wanted to say something to them about it. I don’t remember what he said, but I think it was along those lines. And that was how I first met Siegfried, too; he’d accompanied his parents to the bonfire, and came over with them to see me. He’s a little older than me, and introduced himself rather solemnly.”

Ahiru giggled. “I can kind of imagine that. I bet you were starstruck, meeting a Prince and all.”

“… Yeah, I was.” Fakir nodded. “Unfortunately, it turned out to be the last one his father attended – he fell ill the following year and passed away shortly after the Festival, which he’d been too sick to attend.”

“Oh no…” Ahiru’s face fell. “That’s so sad… what happened to his mother?”

“She’s still alive, but in poor health.” Fakir brushed some hair out of his eyes. “She ruled in his stead until he came of age, and then stepped down. She moved some months later to her old family home in the country, where she’s tended to by doctors there; she rarely makes visits here anymore.”

“Awww, that’s too bad.” Ahiru’s eye was caught by another dancing couple: the woman was performing ballet-like moves, and she found herself breathless for a moment at the artistry of it. “I bet he misses her a lot, and it’s too bad she wasn’t able to come to the wedding.”

“I’m sure he does.” Fakir shrugged. “He doesn’t talk about it much, even with me.”

“Oh, so you two share a lot with each other?” She tore her eyes away from the dancing again to look up at him curiously.

“… Most things.” Something flickered in his eyes. “We both have our secrets, though, as anyone does. We _are_ very close, however.”

“That makes sense.” Ahiru turned back to the dancing again. “Like I told you earlier, I don’t even tell Pike and Lilie everything. Of course, that’s a bit different… I don’t think he’d tease you or anything for whatever it is you don’t tell him.”

“… No. I… don’t think he would.”

They fell silent then, particularly as Ahiru was so enraptured by the dancing that she couldn’t think of anything to say as conversation. When it was all over she found herself sighing in disappointment, for it hadn’t seemed to last long enough. Siegfried and Rue made another short speech before descending the stage and wading into the crowd to present the Golden Apple to the lucky winning couple; the fortunate pair were then pulled into the center, near the stage, to take their bows and curtsies while everyone else clapped for them. After they’d returned to the throng, the woman clutching the Apple tightly in her hands, it came time for the final dance of the evening. Some knights took away the stage, and then Rue and Siegfried began to dance. They waltzed slowly and gracefully around the open space, their movements calling to mind the gentle drifting of snowflakes in the first snow of winter, or maybe leaves descending from the trees as autumn passed away. No, both, perhaps, Ahiru decided – first the one, and then the other, symbolic of the changing of the seasons. It was a beautiful thing to watch, and she found herself mesmerized all over again.

By the time they finished, the bonfire had nearly burnt itself out; Siegfried and Rue made one final speech thanking everyone for coming, and wishing the blessings of the seasons upon all. The knights who’d lit the fire came forward when they were done speaking and escorted them out and, presumably, back home to the castle. Ahiru watched them leave, watched the crowd as it began to disperse, and watched also the dying flames of the bonfire. There was something almost sad about it, as though she was watching autumn itself die out.

“There’ll be another one next year, don’t worry.” Charon interrupted her thoughts; indeed, it seemed nearly as though he’d _read_ them.  “It looks a bit melancholy, I know, but that’s the cycle of seasons for you. Autumn passes away into winter, winter into spring, then on to summer and autumn again. Every year without fail.” He scratched the back of his head. “Besides, there’s still plenty of fun to come in winter yet, it’s not an unpleasant season at all – we’ve got Yule coming up soon, for one thing.”

“Oh, I know.” Ahiru twined one of the ribbons from her flower crown around her finger. “I – I’m really looking forward to that too, and to anything else that goes on… and I don’t hate winter, I actually like playing in the snow, in fact, I like all the seasons. There’s always something good about each one.”

“Indeed.” He smiled. “Well, in any case… now that the big event’s over, I think it’s time for this old man to head home.” He glanced over at Lysander, who Ahiru hadn’t seen before now but had apparently been standing beside Charon the entire time. It didn’t surprise her that she hadn’t _heard_ him up to now, though. “You ready to go too?”

“Yeah.” Lysander nodded.

“All right.” Charon shrugged. “You could stay a little longer if you wanted to, but I guess you don’t… not that I mind, I’ll be grateful for the help when we get home, and we should get back to work tomorrow, too.” He looked over at Edel, Fakir, and Ahiru. “I’ll bid you all goodnight, then – you can bring the cart back any time tomorrow if that’s easier, Edel, don’t worry about it. Ahiru, I’m glad you had a good time at your first Festival, and Fakir…” His face creased in a smile. “I’m happy to see you here, and that you’re doing better. You gave me quite a scare this month, you know.”

“… Sorry.” Fakir shuffled his feet a little. “I didn’t mean to – I just…”

“It’s fine.” Charon clapped him on the shoulder. “Take care now, I’ll see you soon.”

He and Lysander headed off then, and Edel turned to Ahiru and Fakir. “How about you two? Do you want to stay a little longer? Some of the shops will stay open a while yet if there’s more you want to look at.”

“Not me.” Ahiru shook her head and yawned. “I’m too tired now… and I know you are too, I couldn’t ask you to stay longer just cause I wanted to buy more stuff.”

“That’s very considerate of you.” She smiled. “What about you, Fakir?”

“I’d like to head home too.” He rubbed his temple. “I’m a bit worn out myself.”

“Home it is, then.” Edel let out a yawn of her own.

They walked off together then, making for Spellmeyer Road and the warehouse where Fakir’s horse and Charon’s cart were still tied up. Ahiru saw Fakir looking furtively around as they passed through the dregs of the Festival, but she didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary and it didn’t seem like he did either. When they arrived back at the warehouse they found that some kind person had provided oats and water for Fakir’s horse; it was dozing a little, but woke up at a few quiet words from Fakir, who got it going again. As it had been that afternoon, Fakir led his horse through the street, the now-empty cart still hitched to it, and Edel and Ahiru followed close behind. There was no conversation this time, however, for they were all too tired and sleepy for that, and their yawns frequently punctuated the air.

As they passed Charon’s house Fakir suggested they go on ahead while he returned horse and cart to the stable on the premises, but Ahiru and Edel both insisted that they’d wait for him, and so they did. He didn’t take very long, and soon rejoined them for the short walk the rest of the way home. They all seemed to sag with relief as soon as they walked in the front door, and mumbled their goodnights to each other in yawning voices as they parted ways to go to their bedrooms.

Tempting as it was to just fall into bed in her clothes and go to sleep fully dressed, Ahiru knew she needed to change into something else. She set her flower crown on the chest of drawers after lighting her lamp, smiling fondly and sleepily at it, and then began the lengthy process of taking her hair down. She undid all the braids, took out the ribbons, and then brushed it and put it into a single long braid. After that she undressed and changed into a nightgown, and doused the lamp before climbing into bed, falling asleep almost as soon as her head touched the pillow.

She didn’t seem to sleep for very long, however, before she found herself blinking in the dark and wondering what had roused her. Ahiru laid there for a minute, and rubbed her eyes, and was about to close them again when a muffled voice from not very far away caught her attention and jarred her into full alertness.

“– saw you with –”

“– what it looked –”

“– told her about –”

“– nothing.”

“– that you don’t, or –”

“– derstood.”

Something else was said after that, but she couldn’t make it out, not above the rustling of her sheets and the slight creak of her mattress as she sat up. She eased her shutters open, and peered out the window; as her eyes adjusted, she spotted what looked like a pair of shadowy figures walking away into the misty darkness. Her shoulders relaxed at that, and she let her breath out. She watched them disappear before closing her window and lying back down on the bed.


	14. Chapter 14

The soft hooting of owls awoke Ahiru three days after the Harvest Festival; she lay still for a couple minutes as she tried to work out what hour it must be without actually rolling over and looking at her bedside clock. Rising for the day seemed unappealing as well – the air felt even chillier somehow than it had the night before, and she pulled her blankets tighter around herself in an effort to gather more warmth. The owls’ calls soothed her somewhat, and she found her eyes wanting to close again despite the semi-brightness of her room.

Curiosity soon overtook her, however, and she rolled over at last to see what time it said. She sighed as she saw it was nearly time to get up, and even though it was Friday she knew she couldn’t sleep in. She had things to do and a tutoring session to get to in the afternoon, so delaying getting out of bed wouldn’t help her at all. With a louder sigh, she sat up and opened up the shutters to see how much bird seed was left in her bowl so she’d know whether to refill it today or not.

The bowl didn’t attract her attention first, however – that honor was reserved for the gently falling snow that had begun to blanket the earth and the trees outside her window. Her grumpiness over leaving her warm bed forgotten, she gasped in delighted surprise and leaned forward, pressing her small nose to the screen. No wonder the air felt so cold! Delicate clumps of white poured down from the opaque sky like powdered sugar, coating the branches of the forest trees as far as her eye could see. The ground looked pristine as well, the layer of freshly fallen snow unbroken by even the prints of animal feet. Ahiru found herself entranced by the almost otherworldly beauty of it all, and spent a few minutes just watching the snow fall.

At last, however, she made herself close the shutters – after confirming that she didn’t need to refill the food bowl yet – and get up out of bed. It was still something of a wrench to leave its warmth behind, and the water she used to wash her face felt so icy that she quacked and shivered at the first contact with it. She rushed through dressing herself, and added a robe as an extra layer over her dress.

When she got to the kitchen, Ahiru found Edel sitting alone at the table, stirring a spoonful of honey into her tea while reading the newspaper. Porridge sat simmering on the stove, and the usual spread had been set up on the table. She frowned, however, at what she _didn’t_ see. “Where’s Fakir?”

“Hmmm? Oh, Ahiru.” Edel glanced up from the newspaper, and set her spoon on the saucer. “He’s been and gone already – you missed him.”

“Huh? Gone where?” Ahiru moved to the stove and started spooning porridge into a bowl. “Is… is he moving out?”

“No, the opposite – he rose early to tender his resignation from the knights.” Edel sipped her tea. “He’ll be living here with us while he figures out his path – Charon’s promised him work at the forge, but there’s no room to stay there. So he’ll remain with us, at least until he finds a new career and home.”

“Oh!” Something fluttered inside Ahiru. “Oh, that’s – well, I mean, I feel bad for him a little cause he liked being a knight, but… but I also think it might be kind of good, now he’ll be safe… and I’m glad he has a place to be while he figures stuff out.”

“Of course.” Edel spread some preserves on a piece of bread. “I would never turn him away, especially not after what’s happened.”

“Oh no, I know that, that’s not what I meant.” Ahiru shook her head. “I just meant that I’m glad you have room, a-and that you’re here, and… y-yeah.” She turned her attention to pouring tea for herself, and brought it and her bowl over to the table. “Do you think he’ll decide to become a blacksmith like Charon?”

“Who knows?” Edel shrugged and took a bite of bread. “I imagine he’s considering it, but it’s too soon to say,” she added after she’d swallowed.

“That’s true…” Ahiru spooned some honey into her own tea, and added a few drops of goat’s milk as well. She stirred spices and honey into her porridge, and then added preserves to a slice of bread and butter to a poppy seed muffin they’d bought at Ebine’s bakery the previous day. “I’m sure he’ll figure it out in time, though… and I hope he’s happy when he does.”

“As do I.”

Edel returned to reading the paper after that, and Ahiru fell silent so as not to bother her while she did. They ate quietly, the only noise between them that of the rustling of the newspaper and the clink of teacups on saucers and spoons in bowls. Ahiru’s thoughts drifted to Fakir more than once; what exactly was he doing, she wondered? She had no idea what it entailed to resign from the knights, what sort of things he had to do and what paperwork he might have to fill out. _Was_ there any paperwork? It was a realm she was completely ignorant about. He’d probably have to say goodbye to Prince Siegfried, for one thing, as well as the rest of the knights. That would probably be hard on him. She frowned down at her food. And how would he get all his things back here? Maybe he borrowed that cart from Charon, the one they’d used to transport items for sale to the Festival a few days ago. That would certainly make it a lot easier. But still, all alone? She hoped he’d be back before she left for Mr. Katz’ house so she could help him carry things inside, and also that he’d dressed warmly enough so that he wouldn’t catch cold from being out in the snow.

“I’ll be in the library if you need me,” Edel told Ahiru a little while later, after they’d finished eating and cleaned everything up. “Unless you think you need my help right now?”

“N-no, I think I can manage okay.” Ahiru nodded. “But I’ll come get you if I need to, thank you.”

“All right.” Edel smiled. “Enjoy yourself, then.”

“I will!”

After she’d finished cleaning herself up from breakfast, Ahiru headed back into the kitchen. She rolled her sleeves up and put on her apron, and then set about getting out all the ingredients she needed to bake a nice loaf of bread. It would be a present for Mr. Katz, in the spirit of the Yule season; it was getting to be that time when she and Edel would be baking all sorts of things for friends and customers as gifts, and she certainly couldn’t leave her teacher out of it. She’d make him a lovely sweet bread, studded with nuts and candied fruit and a marzipan filling, with a sprinkling of powdered sugar on top to finish it.

It took her the whole of the morning to finish it, and during the time it took to rise twice she cleaned up what she could, and then sat at the kitchen table and wrote letters. She wrote to Pike and Lilie, of course, but also to friends like Freya and even a note to Princess Rue, wishing her a happy Yule with many blessings. She had a nice stack by the time the bread had been put in the oven, and while it baked she completed the last letter and put them all in the basket that she and Edel used to store mail that needed to be sent out.

Edel returned to the kitchen just after Ahiru pulled the loaf out of the oven, and while it cooled she began to prepare lunch. Ahiru hung her apron up where it belonged and scurried off to her room for a book that she brought back and read at the kitchen table. The scent of the food Edel was cooking mingled with that of the freshly baked bread, and before very long Ahiru’s stomach was growling audibly; she doubled over in her chair and tried to rustle the pages of her book loudly enough to drown it out. At the same time, she couldn’t help fidgeting, wanting so badly to eat what smelled so good and feeling like breakfast had been a day ago instead of mere hours. She stopped being able to concentrate on her book and kept glancing over at what Edel was doing, to see if she’d started the tea yet. That would be a sign that the meal was nearly done and ready to be served.

As it happened, Edel had just put the kettle on when the door opened and Fakir walked in. “Hey.” He rubbed the top of his head, sending a small amount of snow flying off his dark locks and onto the floor. “Sorry if I’m late.”

“Not at all.” Edel glanced over her shoulder at him. “It’s done, then?”

“Yeah.” Fakir peeled his gloves off and sat down at his usual spot across from Ahiru. “As of today, I’m no longer a member of the knights. I’m… I guess you could call it free.” He laughed mirthlessly.

“So you moved out of the castle?” Ahiru asked as she marked her place in her book and pushed it aside. “What’d you do with all your stuff?”

“It’s in a cart in Charon’s stable.” He leaned back in his chair. “I’ll get it all later.”

“I’ll help you if you want!” Ahiru sat up straighter. “I don’t mind at all, though if you want to get it right after lunch I won’t be able to cause I have to go to Mr. Katz’s house for a lesson, but if you were planning on getting it later I can help you.”

“I’ll see.” Fakir shrugged. “I’m in no rush for most of it, so don’t worry about it. I would like to get it over and done with soon, though, just to have it out of the way.”

“Y-yeah, I understand that.” Ahiru nodded. “I was like that when I got here too, it wasn’t like unpacking all my things was really the most fun thing ever, but I knew I needed to get it done and over with before I could really relax that first night, cause I didn’t want to worry about it the next day when I was trying to get started on learning everything, you know?”

“Mmmm.” Fakir stared down at the table, apparently finding a knot in the wood immensely fascinating.

“What do you have to bring in?” Edel asked. “Anything large?”

“No.” He shook his head, still staring down at the table. “Mostly books and clothes. I took only the essentials with me when I moved into the castle; more frivolous items are still in some closet or other at Charon’s.” He traced the knot idly with one finger. “I don’t even remember a lot of what’s still over there. And the furniture I used in both rooms I left behind.”

“Well, you don’t need it here anyway.” Edel started slicing and buttering some bread. “You have a bed and furniture in your room to use, and if you happen to need more I’m sure you have enough money to buy some.” She paused. “On that subject, how do you feel about the room you’re currently in? Is it sufficient for you, or would you rather move to another? You don’t need to stay next to Ahiru now that you’re recovered, so you’re free to pick a different room if there’s one that suits you more.”

“Is there a major difference between the one I’ve been using and the others?” He finally glanced up and looked over at Edel.

“No, not really, only in layout.” Edel shook her head and poured some tea into cups. “You might have to switch some medical supplies out, too, should you choose to go to another room.”

“Then what’s the point of switching?” Fakir accepted a cup from Edel, and picked up a spoon so that he could stir honey into his tea. “I’ll just stay where I am. Less hassle, and if I really feel like moving furniture around to get a different layout I can do that myself.”

“I can see that. But do you feel like you have enough privacy?” Edel brought over the food she’d prepared for lunch – meatballs, noodles, and roasted potatoes and parsnips.

“I…” Fakir hesitated, something flickering in his eyes as if he’d remembered something. “… Well, it’s… no, it’ll be fine, it’s not as if there are holes in the wall that we can see each other through, after all.”

“Fair enough.” Edel shrugged. “And if you ever change your mind, you can always switch rooms at any time. Provided no one else is staying in one.”

“I should be fine.” Fakir focused his attention on ladling food onto his plate. “Don’t worry.”

“Very well, then.” Edel glanced at Ahiru. “How do you feel about that, Ahiru? Is changing rooms something you might want to do? I don’t want either of you to be uncomfortable with the situation.”

“N-no, I’m fine too.” Ahiru shook her head. “I don’t mind having someone next door to me, like he said, it’s not like we can see each other, so it’s totally private, and I don’t make much noise so I’m sure I won’t disturb him, and I’ll try extra hard now, not that I wasn’t before, but…” She looked down and stirred her tea a little more vigorously. “I – I’m sure it’ll be okay.”

“If you say so, then I’m sure it will be.” Edel looked over at Fakir. “And you? How are you doing, now that it’s over? I’m sure it wasn’t an easy choice, nor an easy thing to go through with.”

“It’s…” Fakir stared down at his plate, and pushed a meatball around in the sauce. “I’m fine. I had… a lot of time to think about it while I was convalescing after the attack. It isn’t a sudden thing.”

“Oh, I know it isn’t, but I still can’t help but worry. It’s my job, after all.” Edel gave a rueful laugh, and ate a bite of noodles before continuing. “And I know there’s also quite a difference between thinking on a thing, and then actually acting on it – I’m sure no amount of rehearsal and practice could fully prepare you for standing there before Siegfried and the other knights and bidding them and your former life goodbye.”

“It wasn’t that bad.” Fakir stabbed a piece of parsnip and put it in his mouth. “I knew they’d understand, and they did,” he added once he’d swallowed. “Like I said, I’d had more than enough time to think about it and prepare while I was recovering.”

“Yes, I heard you. But surely it must still have been a wrench?” Edel sipped her tea. “I remember well how passionate you were about becoming a knight, how devoted to your duty you’ve always been, and you must also have had great camaraderie with the others, not to mention your friendship with Siegfried… I don’t know how mere thought could ever have prepared you for that.”

“I had a _month_.” Fakir set his fork down hard and reached for his cup. “Whether you think so or not, that was plenty of time for me. I got acclimated to it well before I left this morning. You don’t have to worry about me.”

“I’m sorry, I just… find it difficult to believe that even that amount of time could have been sufficient for a face to face encounter, not to mention the act itself of leaving something that meant so much to you, and I worry about how you are now that it’s all over.” Edel chewed a piece of parsnip thoughtfully. “How did Siegfried take it?”

“He was fine.” Fakir’s jaw clenched slightly. “Disappointed, but he understood. As I _said_ , it wasn’t that bad.” He stabbed a meatball, and bit into it.

“Hmmm.” Edel sipped some tea. “And the other knights? You were there a while, I imagine it was a lengthy process… I hope it wasn’t more difficult than you’re letting on.”

“It was _fine_.” Fakir finally looked up, his eyes flashing. “Look, there’s nothing to talk about, and I don’t feel like answering a bunch of questions about it all anyway. Please, just take my word for it.”

“… I’m sorry.” Edel sighed. “I merely… no, there is no excuse for pushing on so, I apologize. I will leave you be about it now, and not try to force you to discuss anything you don’t want to talk about.”

“… Thank you.” Fakir looked down at his food again. “I… look, I… I know you’re worried about me, and I know you can’t help it, and I certainly don’t resent your concern. But I really am fine, and I don’t feel like going into it all. I resigned, everyone bid me farewell, it was about what you’d expect. I only took so long because I had things to pack and legal matters to sort out.”

“I understand.” Edel nodded. “And I shouldn’t pry, anyway. I am sorry.”

“… It’s fine.” Fakir pushed a piece of potato around a little, right into the noodles. Ahiru, watching him surreptitiously, noticed that he merely moved his food around the plate without actually eating for a few minutes more; only after she stopped looking did she hear him take a bite.

They ate in silence for several minutes, until Ahiru finally summoned up enough nerve to speak. “Um… Fakir?”

“Yeah?” He glanced over at her, his expression neutral. “What is it?”

“W-well, I – I, um…” She looked down, and twirled some noodles around with her fork. “I – I just remembered… when you were still recovering, you said you were kind of interested in maybe taking lessons with Mr. Katz… right?”

Fakir took a sip of tea. “Yeah. I am. Why?”

“O-oh, just… I’m going over there after lunch for one of my lessons, cause we just finished a book so I have to get a new one from him… b-but anyway, I was wondering, maybe you’d like to come with me? You could talk to him and maybe set up when you’d go over, and what book to start with, and stuff like that.” She fidgeted. “I mean, you don’t have to if you’d rather stay here and unpack or something, b-but I thought I’d ask…”

“… No, that sounds good.” He set his fork down and glanced out the window. “I’ll go with you. Thanks for asking.”

“I – of course!” Ahiru couldn’t help but happily wiggle her toes a little, and she smiled at him. He didn’t see it, though, distracted as he was by whatever thoughts were on his mind.

He spoke little throughout the rest of the meal, but afterwards volunteered to help with clean-up in place of Edel, which she accepted before returning to the library. He washed the dishes while Ahiru dried them, and assisted her in putting them away as well; once that was done they parted, briefly, to ready themselves for their trip to Mr. Katz’ house. Ahiru hurried to the kitchen after leaving her room, and packed the bread she’d baked into a basket, covered by a protective cloth to keep the snow out.

“All ready?” Fakir asked as she reached the front door. He’d already gotten all bundled up again, putting back on his coat, gloves, cloak, and a thick black scarf.

“Y-yeah, I just need my cloak…” Ahiru set her basket and the bag containing her book and notes down on the table, and took her cloak down from its peg. She’d exchanged her robe for a warmer overcoat, and added gloves and a scarf around her neck as well. “There…” She pulled the hood up over her head after fastening the cloak, conscious suddenly of where some of her unruly hair poked up under it and gave her head an odd shape from behind.

To make matters worse, it seemed like Fakir had noticed it too; he said nothing about it, however, and his gaze flicked back down to her face so quickly she couldn’t be sure. “All right.” He glanced over at her bag and basket. “Do you need help carrying either of those?”

“N-no, thank you, I’ll be fine.” Ahiru tugged her hood forward a little, hoping it would flatten her hair a little, and then slipped her bag onto her shoulder and the basket on her arm. “Let’s go, I don’t want to be late, and it’s probably still snowing.”

“Yeah.” Fakir held the door open for her after he exited the house, and closed it behind them. “Be careful you don’t slip.”

“I will.” She nodded. “These are new boots I just got from the shoemaker’s, I think they should help me keep from falling.”

“I’m sure they’re good. It’s no excuse to be careless, though,” he warned her.

Ahiru bristled slightly. “I – I’m not! I just – sometimes I don’t or can’t see everything, you know? Stuff gets hidden under the snow and there’s ice and… and yeah!”

“… I know. Sorry.” Fakir shifted his shoulders slightly. “I just…” He pressed his lips together and looked away. “I wouldn’t… like to see you get hurt. That’s all.”

“Oh, th-that’s okay!” Ahiru started to swing her arms, but thought better of it as she didn’t want to hit Fakir or send her bread flying. “A-and you should be careful too, I don’t want you to get hurt either!”

“I will.” He glanced down at her basket. “What’s in there, anyway?”

“Oh, I – I made Mr. Katz some stollen.” Ahiru adjusted it slightly. “I thought it’d be a nice present before Yule, you know? Cause it’s that time of year. Edel and I are going to start making lots of stuff for friends and customers soon.”

“That’s kind of you.” He lifted a branch so that his head wouldn’t collide with it; Ahiru just barely stopped herself from ducking on instinct, knowing it would look silly.

“Y-yeah, I wanted him to have a special treat, and it was really fun to make. It took a long time, but I liked doing it anyway.” She dodged around a small snowdrift. “I’ll probably make more for just us, too, cause it’s so yummy. Do you like it?”

“Mmm-hmm.” Fakir nodded. “Edel makes a loaf for me every year and delivers it to the…” He stopped. “… But now I can just eat it here.”

“Y-yeah, you can.” Ahiru looked down at the cloth, to make sure that it was secure over the bread. “A-and I hope you like mine, too…”

“I’m…” Fakir trailed off, and didn’t speak again for another few minutes. Ahiru didn’t know quite what to say, but decided to try talking to him anyway; however, just as she did, he spoke in a quiet voice that she could just barely hear. “I have… it’s… it’s not always easy for me to talk to her.”

“Huh?” Ahiru turned to look at him. “What are you talking about?”

“Back there. At lunch. I’m sure you noticed and thought that… but it’s, you see…” He let his breath out in a deep sigh. “I don’t know if you’ve been – if she’s – if you’ve noticed this yet, but she has a tendency to ask a lot of questions when she’s trying to figure out what’s wrong. It comes from her line of work, I suppose, since she has to determine what’s ailing her patients and figure out what treatment is best for them, but she doesn’t always turn it off in other situations. And that… it stresses me out a bit.” His brows drew together and lifted slightly, and he folded his arms. “I know that sounds terrible, but…”

“N-no it doesn’t, not to me.” Ahiru shook her head. “I know she means well, but if it makes you feel anxious or stressed when she does that, it’s not like you can help it, you can’t control stuff like that.”

“I know.” Fakir sighed again. “I know that. But… it doesn’t stop me feeling guilty when her questions make something in me seize up and not want to talk, or lash out. I can’t help that it makes me anxious and difficult to calm down afterwards, but at the same time… I shouldn’t lash out, and I feel like it’s a horrible overreaction to someone’s well-meant concern.”

“I don’t think it is.” Ahiru moved to walk closer to him. “You can’t help what reaction something produces in you.” She paused. “Have – have you told her about it?”

“Once.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Years ago. I don’t know if she’s forgotten or what.”

“Maybe next time she does it, you could remind her?” Ahiru suggested. “Just kind of gently tell her that it makes you anxious or stressed or whatever word you want to use, and ask her to not ask you so many questions about stuff. I don’t think she’d get mad at you for that.”

“I know she wouldn’t. I just…” His shoulders slumped slightly. “I don’t know if I can say it well to her. I… how do I put this?” He took a breath and let it out. “She’s family, and I care about her, don’t get me wrong. But I’ve never been… no, it isn’t right for me to say I’ve never been entirely comfortable with her, because that makes it sound like a fault of hers, when it’s mine. There are few people I can really talk to comfortably, and that’s my flaw. Not theirs.”

“I… I don’t know if I’d call that a _flaw_ , really…” Ahiru looked down at the ground. “I mean, I know it must be sad and lonely sometimes, or just not fun for you in other ways, but… I don’t think it makes you a bad person or anything. I mean, we talked about this at the Festival, kind of, I don’t share everything with my friends either.  It just means maybe we need to practice, or – or find people we _can_ talk to. You know? ”

“That’s the thing, though.” He pushed at a stray lock of hair that had fallen into his eyes. “I haven’t tried hard enough. And now it’s too late.”

“No, I don’t agree.” Ahiru shook her head. “It’s never too late, you can always find more friends. And you’re probably being too hard on yourself anyway, I bet you’ve tried without realizing it, or you’ve tried but you don’t think it’s been hard enough because you think the worst of yourself automatically. N-not that I’m any better,” she added, her hand going to the end of her scarf and fiddling with the fringe. “I – I’m just as bad, I’ve told you that before, so – so don’t take that as me judging you, I just… I understand really well, that’s all…”

“No, I know.” Fakir looked down at her with an unreadable expression. “And… I suppose you’re right. I still have… there’s time for me to improve.”

“Yep! Although… like I said…” Ahiru swallowed.  “I – I don’t think you’re terrible or anything _now_ …”

“Just rude sometimes.” She looked up, and saw that the corners of his mouth had lifted slightly, into a wry half-smile.

“I… well… um…” She floundered for words. “I mean, um – y-yeah, you have been before, I’m not going to lie or pretend you haven’t, b-but you’re much nicer to me now, I like talking to you, I…” She trailed off, feeling her face heat up, and looked away. “I – I consider us friends now…”

“… I know. And…” His voice became even lower. “… I do too.”

“Oh.” She didn’t dare look up at him. “Th-that’s good… I’m glad… and…” She hesitated, and then reached out to give his hand a small squeeze, ignoring the fluttering of her heart at the contact. “I’m sorry… n-not for anything I did, or said, but for you, cause I know this all is really hard on you.” She pulled her hand away, heat rising in her face. “You don’t have to talk about any of it with me if you don’t want to, I won’t pressure you or anything, but I’m… I’m here for you, a-and I support you, and… y-yeah.”

“… Thank you.” She could hear something odd in his voice, but couldn’t put her finger on what it was, exactly. “Anyway, I… meant to ask… does Mr. Katz send you to a particular bookstore to get the books for the lessons?”

“Oh no, he never makes me buy the books!” Ahiru adjusted the strap of her bag. “He always buys the books ahead of time for all his students so they don’t have to pay anything at all… he told me he wants education to be accessible to everyone regardless of how rich or poor they are.”

“Oh.” They paused at a curb, to let a cart go by. “That’s kind of him.”

“Yeah, he’s really nice, I think you’ll like him.” The cart slowly wheeled itself past them, and when it was safely out of their way they crossed the street. “I really enjoy the lessons and I feel like I learn a lot… though you probably don’t have that much to learn, and you’re way smarter…”

“I don’t agree.” Fakir shook his head. “Everyone always has a lot to learn, and I haven’t had as much time to read over the years as I’d like. And you’re not stupid, so don’t say things like that.”

“I kind of feel like it sometimes,” Ahiru admitted in a low voice. “I didn’t get to learn about a lot of really useful stuff and there’s so much I don’t know about fairies, and books, and… and lots of stuff.”

“That doesn’t make you stupid. It just means that whoever educated you did a haphazard job, and that’s not on you at all.” He pulled his hood up more. “You don’t come off as stupid to me, for whatever that’s worth.”

“I…” Ahiru blinked, her vision suddenly misty. “Th-thank you… that’s… that’s really nice of you to say…”

“I don’t say things just to be nice.” He brushed some snow off his sleeve. “I meant it.”

“I – I know that! I didn’t mean that I think you did, I just… it was really kind of you.” Ahiru pretended to wipe a snowflake out of her eye. “Thank you. It’s definitely worth a lot.”

“You’re welcome.” He turned his head away, scanning the street for – Ahiru didn’t know what, but she assumed he was making sure no other carts or people were coming their way as they crossed another street. “It’s this way, right?”

“Yep!” Ahiru increased her pace a little, feeling like she could skip but not wanting to. She wound up ahead of him, and turned to face him after stepping up onto the curb. “It’s not much further, I – oh!”

A startled gasp escaped her as someone rushing by knocked into her back, clearly not looking where they were going – she flapped her arms and quacked as she fell forward, horror lancing through her for a split second at the thought of falling onto the stollen she’d made for Mr. Katz. The thought didn’t have to time to fully form, however, as Fakir moved swiftly to catch her in his arms, holding her steady so that she didn’t fall. “Ahiru? Are you all right?”

“I… y-yeah…” Ahiru took a deep breath, aware that her heart was racing for multiple reasons. “Is – is the bread okay, did it fall out?”

“No, it’s fine. That – ” He paused. “That… _person_ didn’t hurt you, did they?” He sounded very much like he was holding himself back from using stronger language, and the thought made her want to giggle despite everything else happening at the moment.

“N-no, I’m okay.” Ahiru shook her head. “They bumped into me and I can still kind of feel it but it doesn’t hurt, and I was more worried about the bread…” She lifted her head to see real concern in his eyes – eyes that were suddenly much closer than usual. Her mouth went dry and she tried to swallow. “S-so, don’t – don’t worry about me, it wouldn’t have been bad if I fell, not for me anyway, it would’ve been worse for Mr. Katz’ present… but, um, thank you, I don’t want to sound ungrateful, cause I’m not, thank you for helping me…”

“Hmph.” He helped her steady herself, letting go only when she could clearly stand on her own. “It’s nothing. I’m just…” He cleared his throat. “It’s a good thing you weren’t hurt.”

“N-no, I’m fine, thank you.” Ahiru adjusted her basket, suddenly very interested in making sure the blanket was still in place. “L-let’s hurry, though, so we won’t be late.”

“All right.”

Fakir stepped up onto the curb once she’d moved back, and stayed very close to her as they walked the rest of the way. The memory of his arms around her seemed to warm her from within, and Ahiru fought down the giggles that wanted to bubble up and escape her. A few nervous glances at his face revealed that he had no idea what kind of reaction he’d produced in her, and she relaxed a little; it really wouldn’t do to have him realize that she’d developed such a crush on him. That would make things unbearably awkward at home, especially for him, and she didn’t have the heart to cause him discomfort like that, not when his life was already full of upheaval. She’d have to keep her feelings well-hidden for both their sakes.

True to her word they soon arrived at Mr. Katz’ house, and Ahiru rang the bell. Only a minute or two passed before Mr. Vogel pulled it open. “Ah, Miss Klein, right on time. And…” His gaze strayed to Fakir, and his eyebrows lifted. “You are?”

“This is Fakir, my friend!” Ahiru spoke before Fakir could. “He came with me today cause he wants to talk to Mr. Katz about taking tutoring too.”

“Ah.” He nodded. “Come right in, then.”

He stepped aside, holding the door open for both of them and closing it once they’d entered. They hung their cloaks on the pegs set aside for guests, and then Mr. Vogel led them to the parlor where Mr. Katz conducted his tutoring sessions. Mr. Katz himself was seated on one of the sofas, and smiled as he saw Ahiru enter. “Ah, good afternoon Miss Ahiru.” He glanced at Fakir. “I see you’ve brought a friend, too.”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded, and led Fakir over. “This is Fakir Grunewald, and Fakir, this is Mr. Katz.”

Fakir extended his hand. “It’s good to meet you.”

“Ah, yes, good to meet you too.” Mr. Katz shook his hand, and then Fakir and Ahiru picked chairs to sit in. “What brings you here today? Did Miss Ahiru perhaps wish for an escort in this weather?”

“Oh no, he’s here about tutoring!” Ahiru could feel heat all over, though she supposed it might have been from the large and lively fire crackling merrily in the fireplace. “Fakir wanted to start learning about literature too, if you can take on another student…”

“Of course, of course. But before we come to that…” Mr. Katz looked back over at her. “Wouldn’t you like to set that unwieldy basket somewhere more comfortable!”

“Oh!” Ahiru leapt back out of her chair as if it had scalded her. “I’m so sorry, I almost forgot… this is a present for you!” She hurried over and put the basket down on the table in front of Mr. Katz. “I hope you like it, I baked it just this morning so it’s fresh…” She took the cloth off, unveiling the stollen before lifting it out.

“Ah, some Yuletide stollen.” Mr. Katz’ mustache twitched and he smiled fondly. “Indeed, Miss Ahiru, I am most fond of it… it is, in fact, perhaps my favorite thing about this time of year. I’m honored you wished to make one for me.”

“Of course!” Ahiru took the basket back, and set it beside her chair before sitting down again. “I couldn’t not make one for you, I mean, you’ve been so kind to do these lessons for me and for free, and I enjoy them so much...”

“I’m glad that you enjoy them. That in itself is its own reward.” Mr. Katz shifted in his seat. “Now then, before we get down to discussing everything, would either of you like some tea? And perhaps a slice of Miss Ahiru’s lovely bread?”

“Tea would be good, but – but I don’t want to take any of the bread, I made it for _you_.” Ahiru shook her head. “Thanks anyway, but I want you to enjoy it all. And I’m full anyway, cause we just had lunch.”

“Fair enough.” He looked over at Fakir. “And you? Tea for you? Anything to eat?”

“Just tea, thank you.” Fakir settled back in his chair and crossed his legs.

“Very well.” Mr. Katz picked up a bell from the small table beside his sofa, and rang it; within a couple of minutes Mr. Vogel had returned. “Ah yes, thank you – some tea for myself and my guests, if you will?”

“Of course, sir.” He nodded, and headed off to the kitchen to prepare some tea.

“An excellent balm on such a day, I should think,” Mr. Katz commented, as Mr. Vogel’s footsteps disappeared down the hall. “I hope the walk here wasn’t too unkind to you.”

“Oh no, not at all.” Ahiru shook her head. “It was kind of fun, actually – it’s not snowing that hard, and it’s not windy either, and everything looked really pretty… I like snow. A-and we didn’t rush either, we left early so we could take our time and not have to run or anything or risk slipping and falling, and we got here on time.” She cast an anxious glance at the clock. “Right?”

“Yes, you did, don’t worry.” He chuckled. “And I am glad to hear of your safety and prudence, I would not want either of you to become injured. So many people are so careless, even in winter weather.”

“I agree.” Fakir’s eyes flashed. “There are too many thoughtless idiots out there who don’t pay enough attention to what’s going on around them.”

“Indeed.” Mr. Katz sighed. “I understand that it is all too easy to become distracted by one’s own troubles and thoughts, but it is important to make the effort to not impede or cause harm in some way to others. Or to oneself, for that matter – how many times have we all seen foolish people step into the path of a cart or an opening door?”

“Y-yeah, I’ve done that.” Ahiru sank down further in her chair, as if trying to shrink herself. “I – I wasn’t looking, or – or somebody else wasn’t looking, and I got hit with a door… or I’ve just been too small to see…” Her hands twisted in her lap. “I’ve learned to be more careful cause of that.”

“Understandable.” Mr. Katz nodded. “It’s something I’ve had to be more watchful of as well, because people aren’t always –” He broke off as Mr. Vogel reentered with the tea. “Ah, here we are. Thank you, thank you.”

“Naturally, sir.” Mr. Vogel set the tray down on the table. “Will that be all?”

“Yes, I do think so… unless either of you require anything further?” He glanced over at Ahiru and Fakir, and when they shook their heads returned his gaze to Mr. Vogel. “It doesn’t seem like we are in need of anything else at the moment, thank you.”

“Then I will resume my duties elsewhere.” Mr. Vogel bowed, and exited the room.

Milk and honey had been provided on the tray as well, so they spent a couple minutes altering their tea to suit their personal tastes. Fakir took a heaping spoonful of honey so big it nearly dripped onto the saucer and no milk, a preference Ahiru was well acquainted with by now; she herself took almost as much honey, and a small amount of milk. As for Mr. Katz, she noticed that he added no honey at all, but _did_ garnish it with enough milk that she had to wonder if it would stay hot for very long at all.

“Ahhhh.” Mr. Katz sighed in satisfaction. “That does hit the spot, oh yes indeed… I admit I have never been over fond of winter, even in my youth, but there is a certain amount of charm to enjoying hot beverages beside a fire on a snowy day, is there not?”

“Definitely.” Ahiru wrapped her small hands around her cup, wanting to savor the warmth. “I – I’ve always liked coming in on a snowy day and having tea and sitting by the fire, maybe reading a book…”

“Yes, winter is a season well-suited for the reading of books indoors.” He nodded. “That said, that brings us to one of the things I must tell you today: our lessons will be taking a hiatus until after the start of the new year. I will of course provide you with our next book to be covered, but we shall not meet again until that time.” He sipped his tea. “I do this with all my students – it is so that they can focus on the celebration of, and preparation for, Yule. Time with family and friends is always important, but perhaps never more so than at this time of year.”

“Y-yeah, that makes sense.” Ahiru looked down at her tea. “And um… honestly that’s kind of a relief to hear… n-not because I dislike coming here or anything, or because I’m sick of the lessons, but because it’s just been so busy for me lately, people are getting sick a lot, and we’ve had to do blessings and wards against really bad weather, and there’s presents to make and things to bake and just…” She sighed. “There’s been a lot to do, and I’m sure you have a lot to do too and people that might be visiting you…”

“Don’t worry, Miss Ahiru, I understand completely.” She heard the clink of a teacup on a saucer. “I know full well that it is a busy time of year for all, but perhaps most so for people like you and Miss Edel. Which is precisely why I give my students a month off.” He coughed, and cleared his throat. “As for myself, I am actually going to be visiting a niece in a fortnight – she has just recently been married, and though I was unable to attend the wedding I promised to come stay with her and her husband for Yule, and so I shall.”

“Oh, how lovely!” Ahiru looked up now, and smiled at Mr. Katz. “I – I hope you have a good time there!”

“I am sure I will. But thank you all the same.” He smiled back at her. “She is a kind girl, and so very accommodating, I do not think there will be any difficulties, nor any shortage of enjoyment.”

“That’s good.” Ahiru drained the last of her tea, and set it and the saucer down on a table. Fakir and Mr. Katz too, she noted, had also finished their tea. “Do – do you want to see my notes now?” She reached for her bag and pulled it onto her lap.

“In just a bit. First, I think, I should work out details and suchlike with your friend here.” He turned to Fakir. “Now then… you are interested in being tutored in literature, correct?”

“Yes.” Fakir nodded. “I’ve… recently come into an abundance of free time, and would like to resume at least part of my education in some subjects. And since reading has always been an interest of mine, my attention was caught when I heard from Ahiru about the service you provide.”

“I see.” Mr. Katz nodded. “I applaud your dedication – furthering one’s knowledge with the time one has to do it in is always a noble pursuit, one that I admire in others. Which is not to say that I hold less respect for those who spend their leisure time otherwise, of course, merely that… well, that it engenders pride in me. Your generation in particular seems to value learning highly, I have noticed, and that gives me great hope for the future.”

“I… well, I don’t think I’m anyone to put hope in, but I do agree about making the most of the time we have.” Fakir glanced away at the wall for a second, seemingly studying an old painting that hung there. “In… any case, my sessions would not begin until after the new year?”

“Correct.” Mr. Katz nodded. “As you are a new student, I do not have a book ready for you as I do for Miss Ahiru, however… would you be willing to wait a few days so that I can have my butler purchase one for you?”

“What book do you plan to assign me first?” Fakir glanced back at Mr. Katz. “Would it be the same as hers?”

“I… hmmm.” Mr. Katz pondered that question. “It depends on what you have read, and if you will be attending lessons at the same time as she does.”

“Which would you prefer?” Fakir shifted in his seat. “Do you normally do one on one tutoring, or do you take multiple students at one time?”

“I do both.” Mr. Katz adjusted his grip on his cane. “I have a few sessions per week where I see multiple students – no more than four, to clarify – and I also have other students who would rather be taught one on one. In all cases, however, those who come for a group lesson are all assigned the same book, whereas with the individual students their books vary from person to person, depending on what they’ve read or feel comfortable reading.”

“Well, I…” Fakir looked over at Ahiru. “What’s your opinion? I was thinking that it would be simpler and more convenient if we attended the same lessons, but if you’re not comfortable with that I’ll go on my own.”

“I – I, um… that’d be okay with me! I mean…” Ahiru forced her hands to still and tried not to look as excited as she felt. “Y-you’re right, it _is_ easier that way, and if you don’t mind reading the same book as me and walking with me and stuff, I’m fine with it, I think it’d be kind of fun, and more convenient like you said, and since we live in the same house you could borrow my book over the break to look at…”

“Ah, you both share a living situation?” Mr. Katz’ eyes seemed to gleam for a moment. “You are right, that does make things simpler.”

“Yes, we do.” Fakir looked away again, his cheeks seeming to gain a slight hint of pink. “Edel is my aunt, and I’ve recently come to live with her, at least until I find a new home of my own.”

“I see.” Mr. Katz nodded. “Well, then, that does simplify things, as you both have stated. If you’re both comfortable with your lessons being conducted jointly, then I have no objection to teaching you that way. Miss Ahiru comes by every Friday – barring illness or pressing responsibilities on either of our parts – at this same time. Is that agreeable to you as well?”

“Yeah.” Fakir nodded. “I have no responsibilities of my own at this time just yet – I have work that I will be taking up, but my schedule has yet to be determined and my – my employer will be flexible with the hours.”

“Excellent.” Mr. Katz stroked his mustache. “That leaves only the matter of the book to be assigned first.” He reached down beside the sofa and retrieved a bag Ahiru recognized as being stamped with a familiar name: Althaus Books and Curios. From it he pulled a small, thin book with a cover of leather that had been dyed blue before being stamped with the title: _A Shadow in the Glen_. “Have you ever read this book?” He held it out for Fakir to look at.

“I… hmmm.” Fakir studied it. “I can’t say I have. It doesn’t sound familiar at all.”

“Then that settles it.” He nodded. “You and Ahiru both can read this over the next month. It is actually more of a novella than a full novel, so there are very few chapters – read what you can, take notes, and bring those notes back to me when we meet again. If you can wait, I will have my butler purchase a copy for you and deliver it to your home.”

“Thanks, but there’s no need.” Fakir shook his head. “I can stop by the book store myself and pick up my own copy. I realize you like to pay for your students’ materials yourself, yes,” he added, interrupting Mr. Katz before he could protest. “Ahiru’s told me as much. But as I sprang this on you as a bit of a surprise, I don’t feel like I should inconvenience you or your butler. I’ll purchase a copy myself of this book, and you can supply the others. Is that acceptable?”

“Mrrrr… if you insist.” Mr. Katz stroked his chin. “If it pleases you to do so and you don’t mind, then I have no objection. Though I do wish to know – are you also aware that I charge no fees for the lessons themselves?”

“Yes.” Fakir nodded. “She told me that too.”

“Good, good.” Mr. Katz nodded approvingly. “Then, if there’s nothing further you’d like to arrange with me for the lessons, I’ll review Miss Ahiru’s latest set of notes.”

“I don’t think so.” Fakir settled back in his chair. “Go ahead, and don’t mind me.”

Mr. Katz’ eyes twinkled. “We won’t, don’t worry.” He chuckled, as if to emphasize that he meant it in jest, and then turned to Ahiru. “Here, why don’t you take this book and place it in your bag, and then we can discuss the notes you took on the previous one?”

“O-oh, yeah!” Ahiru scrambled to her feet and took the book from Mr. Katz. She placed it in her bag as she sat down, and pulled her notebook out before setting the bag on the floor, beside her basket. “S-so um… do you want me to start in now?”

“Yes.” Mr. Katz nodded. “Let’s hear what you thought of the denouement of the novel.”

They discussed the last few chapters of the book for a little over an hour; to Ahiru’s surprise, Fakir not only didn’t seem bored, but joined in the conversation from time to time, as he’d actually read the book they were talking about. It became livelier that way, at least to some degree, and Ahiru felt her excitement over the prospect of taking lessons together with Fakir grow even more. He was just as smart and thoughtful as she’d guessed he’d be, and talking with him about plot points and characters and whether or not aspects of the ending felt true to the story and its themes proved to be the most fun she’d had since the night of the Harvest Festival.

All good things had to come to an end, however, and Mr. Katz told them with some regret that as much as he was enjoying their discussion, he needed to go rest as the dampness of the snowy day was beginning to have take its toll on him. Ahiru and Fakir both expressed their understanding, and bid him farewell after finalizing the date of their first post-New Year’s lesson. Mr. Vogel walked them to the door, and they were once again on their own as it shut behind them.

“Ahiru?”

“Yeah?” Ahiru looked up from where she’d just finished arranging her book bag in the basket she’d carried the stollen in. “What is it?”

“Do you mind if we stop by the bookstore so I can pick up a copy of that book?” Fakir gestured to the basket. “If you’d rather not you can go on ahead without me, but I figured that while we’re out I might as well, especially if it’s going to keep snowing like this.”

“Oh no, not at all!” Ahiru shook her head. “I don’t mind, and I’ll go with you, I couldn’t just leave you to walk home alone, that’d be kind of mean… which store do you want to go to?”

“Might as well go to Althaus.” He shrugged. “I think it’s the closest from here.”

“All right.” Ahiru smiled. “Let’s go, then, and then we’ll go back home, and we can both start reading it whenever we feel like it. Cause that does make sense, like you said.”

“Yeah… thanks.” He brushed at his hair beneath the hood of his cloak. “I mean, I could go by myself if you didn’t want to, but…”

“I’m fine, don’t worry.” Ahiru adjusted her own hood. “The snow’s not _too_ bad just yet, and it won’t take that long. So let’s –”

“Wait,” Fakir interrupted her, stopping her before she could start walking past him.

“Huh? Wh-what is it?”

“You’ve got…” He reached over and brushed something off the tip of her nose. “There. You… had a snowflake there.” He shifted slightly and looked away, even as he wiped his finger on his pants.

“O-oh!” Ahiru giggled, even as heat rushed to her face. “Th-thank you!”

“It’s nothing. Let’s go.”

He set off just ahead of her, but then slowed his pace slightly so she could keep up. Ahiru tried to keep her face hidden in her hood as they walked, so intense was her blush. At least, it felt that way. And she could also still feel the momentary brush of his finger against her nose. It made her want to get more snow on there, or on her cheek, so that he could wipe that off too and touch her again. But that would be a bit obvious, she reminded herself, and resigned the idea to a fantasy. A happy fantasy that made her even gigglier, but a fantasy nonetheless.

It occupied her thoughts all the way to Spellmeyer Road, for she and Fakir didn’t talk about anything on the way there. Ahiru felt tempted to ask him what he was thinking, but at the same time she didn’t want to pry, and it was kind of nice anyway to lose herself in giddy daydreams about him. Before she knew it they’d arrived at Althaus Books and Curios, and Fakir wordlessly held the door open for her, the bell jangling as he pulled on the knob.

Pleasantly warm air greeted them when they walked inside, as well as the strains of piano music from somewhere, perhaps the second floor – it was hard to tell. Ahiru’s nose wrinkled as she listened; there was something about the music that sounded rather, well, _tortured_. Not because the unseen player lacked skill – they sounded quite practiced at it – but because of the emotion being conveyed in it. She couldn’t quite put a name to what sort of feeling it gave off, but it was definitely a melancholic one, with a touch of the melodramatic as well.

Fakir muttered something under his breath as he followed Ahiru in, evidently having much the same thoughts about what they were being serenaded with. “Let’s just get the book and get home before it becomes a blizzard out there.”

“Y-yeah, good idea.” Ahiru pulled her copy out of her bag, and checked the author’s name. “Oh… hmmm… maybe this way? I’ve never browsed here before, but they probably keep it in alphabetical order by author.”

“They do, thankfully.” Fakir took off in the direction Ahiru had suggested. “I’ve been here a few times myself to buy things, you’re right about what section it’ll be in, I think… this shouldn’t take too long.”

“Oh, that’s good.” They wandered a bit through the bookshelves, scanning the spines in search of another copy of the book. The music continued unceasingly as they did, and Ahiru heard Fakir let out more than a few sighs of annoyance. Finally, after about the fifth one, she gathered up the courage to ask him. “You… don’t like that song, do you?”

“It’s grating, yeah.” Fakir rubbed the back of his neck. “All the more so because I know who that is playing.”

“The son of the owners?” Ahiru guessed. Fakir nodded.

“Yeah. The first time I came here… he was playing even louder than this, enough to rattle some of the fragile items they keep stocked. And, if you can believe it, an even more irritatingly mournful tune.” He rolled his eyes. “But then the music stopped, and I heard what sounded like an argument going on, and footsteps stomping downstairs… and then I got treated to my first of his bizarre rants.”

“I saw him at the Festival.” Ahiru peered around Fakir’s arm at a book with a blue cover. “He was at the front of the crowd when the dancing started, staring at Princess Rue.”

Fakir snorted derisively. “Figures. He doesn’t seem to grasp that she’s a married woman now and he has no hope.”

“Well… you know…” Ahiru shifted from one foot to the other. “That doesn’t instantly stop somebody’s feelings.”

“… True.” He almost looked like he was going to say more, but his attention was drawn by something on a shelf just above Ahiru’s head. “Ah, there it is, _finally_.” He reached up and grabbed it; Ahiru tilted herself away a little, but the back of his hand nevertheless brushed her cheek, sending a pleasant shiver down her spine despite that he still wore his gloves. “Let’s go pay for this and get out of here.”

Ahiru glanced out the window, where she could see that the snow had started to fall a bit more heavily. “Y-yeah, that sounds good.”

They proceeded to the counter, where Fakir paid a weary-looking Mrs. Althaus for the book, and then exited the store. They made a quick stop by Charon’s stable to retrieve as many of Fakir’s packed belongings as they could carry, on the rationale that it was better to do it now and not have to head back out into the cold again until the next day. By the time they got home the snow had piled up even higher on the ground; it was with no small amount of relief that they stepped inside the front door. Ahiru let out a deep sigh to express that relief as Fakir closed the door, and so did he at the exact same time. Their eyes met, and Fakir smiled and laughed softly while Ahiru giggled. “I’m going to make something hot to drink after we drop this off in my room – do you want some too?”

“Y-yeah, that sounds nice.” Ahiru peeled her gloves off once she’d hung up her cloak, and rubbed her hands together. “My fingers feel like _ice_ …”

Fakir’s gaze dropped to her hands, and something in his eyes flickered. “… Yeah. Mine too.” He looked away, seeming to shake himself slightly. “Come on, let’s go put this stuff away and then warm ourselves up.”

Ahiru followed him to his bedroom and set his things down in there, and then they proceeded into the kitchen. To their surprise, they found a cozy fire crackling in the hearth already. Ahiru sat down in a chair near it while Fakir got out a kettle and a tin of one of Edel’s tisane blends. While it brewed he also warmed and buttered two of the cranberry hazelnut muffins that Ebine had brought over the day before, one for each of them. Ahiru semi-reluctantly moved her chair back over to the table once everything was done and gratefully accepted the cup Fakir handed her, shivering as his fingers brushed hers. “Th-thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He sat down across from her, and tore off a piece of the muffin. “Do you feel any warmer yet?”

“Yeah!” Ahiru took a sip of her tisane and sighed happily as the soothing hot liquid went down her throat, spreading more warmth throughout her. “Oh, this is really good, you brewed it perfectly.”

“Th-thanks.” He looked down at his food, and after a beat seemed to remember to take a bite from the piece he’d torn off.

They ate and drank quietly, not really talking much but enjoying a comfortable silence. Afterwards they worked together to wash and dry and put away everything they’d used; Ahiru stretched her arms and yawned a little once they’d finished. “What are you going to do now? I think I might go have a hot bath and maybe read a little…”

“I’m going to go read in the library, maybe put some stuff away.” Fakir brushed some hair out of his eyes. “See you at dinner.”

“Yeah, see you!” Ahiru smiled, and then bounded off to prepare her bath, sparing one glance back at Fakir.

Once she’d heated the water and filled her tub, she added some of the lavender tincture from the little bottle Edel had insisted she take. She’d felt bad about keeping for herself something that they could’ve sold, but she had to admit she enjoyed using it, and once it was in her possession she couldn’t bear to waste it anyway. She sank happily into the hot, scented water, letting out a sigh and closing her eyes as the fragrant warmth began to soothe her.

Ahiru relaxed in there until the water began to go lukewarm, her book lying unread beside the tub. She tried to read it, she really did, but she gave up about a page and a half in when she realized that she’d absorbed none of it due to her mind being distracted by thoughts about Fakir and various moments between them that day. The rest of her bath time was, thus, fully occupied by giggly reminiscing and fantasizing – for example, about how nice it would have been to hold each other’s hands and massage warmth back into them – until it was time to get out and dry off.


	15. Chapter 15

December proved to be as busy as Ahiru had expected, though perhaps not as much as she’d dreaded. She and Edel still had many things to bake and brew and deliver, but the rash of illnesses that had been going around town lessened, and those that had wanted or needed spells and rites of protection for their homes and families had already had them performed, so that made for less to do. Some also left for visits to out of town friends and families, which cut down on how many people they had to see and check up on. Additionally, without Mr. Katz’ lessons to attend Ahiru now had Friday afternoons free to help shoulder some of the workload.

Fakir began working at the forge the Monday after they’d arranged his schedule with Mr. Katz. He left early in the morning after breakfast – sometimes before Ahiru had even made it to the kitchen – and didn’t return until late in the afternoons, though sometimes he came home for lunch. He worked every day during the week, and had Saturdays and Sundays off. This would change in January when Mr. Katz resumed tutoring: Fakir would then have Fridays off as well. He told Ahiru over tea one day that he’d offered to keep coming in on Friday mornings, but Charon had insisted that he use that time to prepare for his lessons and relax. Ahiru agreed that Charon was right and that Fakir didn’t need to work himself to exhaustion, and Fakir conceded the point, admitting that he did appreciate the extra free time to do with as he wished.

Between one thing and another the month passed swiftly, and before they knew it Yule was nearly upon them. Charon invited them to have the traditional feast at his house, seeing as he’d be alone otherwise given that Lysander would be spending it with his own family; Edel tried to persuade him to instead celebrate at her home and stay over in one of the guest rooms afterwards, but Charon declined, stating that he preferred his own bed. Thus it became arranged that they would go to Charon’s house at midday on Yule, and Edel, Ahiru, and Fakir kept themselves busy in the days leading up to it, preparing their presents and making sure they weren’t seen by their recipients.

A little while before they were meant to leave that day, Ahiru lingered in front of her mirror, trying to decide which of the dried flowers still sitting on the chest of drawers she wanted to put into her hair. She’d let it down for today, as it was a special occasion, and styled it into a waterfall braid that left most of it flowing freely down her back beneath a braid that circled her head. She’d then adorned said braid with some dried flowers she’d bought from Freya recently, and now she just had to pick which ones to place last. After a few more minutes of hemming and hawing she finally went with a blue one and a white one to match her new dress, and arranged them to her liking before beaming at her reflection. Nobody had ever told her that her hair was pretty, so it was hard to appreciate it sometimes, but styling it into things like this made it easier.

Now that that was done she needed to focus on making sure she had everything in order for today’s celebrations. Ahiru checked over her gifts one last time, making sure that she hadn’t let anything poke out of the cloth she’d wrapped them in, and that the ribbons hadn’t been tied either too loosely or too tightly – it wouldn’t do to have the recipients struggle with them, after all. She’d already sent gifts to Pike and Lilie weeks ago, and given presents to other friends like Freya, so that all that remained for today were her gifts for Edel, Charon, and of course Fakir. A fluttering warmth filled her as she carefully laid his present in her basket along with the rest; she’d worked so hard on it, and she did so hope he’d like it.

Once she’d arranged everything properly – making sure nothing would get damaged in any way on even the short walk over – and laid another cloth over it, she headed out of her room and to the main hall. She found Fakir there already, arranging his scarf with his gloves held in his hand, with his own basket of gifts set on the nearby table. He turned at the sound of her footsteps, and opened his mouth wide as if to say something, but swiftly shut it again, and after a moment’s silence seemed to find his train of thought again enough to speak. “… Hey. There you are.”

“Yep! I – I’m not late, am I?” Ahiru looked around anxiously. “Where’s Edel, did she leave without me?”

“She… no. No, you’re not late.” Fakir seemed to snap out of something and glanced down at where he still held his gloves in his hand. He shook his head slightly and pulled them on. “She’s still making sure she has everything, I think… I think that’s what she said.” He scratched the back of his head, looking faintly dazed. “Don’t worry.”

“Oh, okay, good, I thought I was taking too long.” Ahiru walked past him to where her cloak hung on its usual peg; their hands brushed as he reached for his at the same time and it felt like a small shock, one that took her breath away for a moment. “S-so, um, you’re all ready too?”

“Yeah.” Fakir slipped his arms into his cloak, and pulled the hood over his head. “I got all my presents prepared earlier this week, I just needed to put them away.”

“Me too!” Ahiru nodded at him as she fastened her cloak and arranged the hood carefully over her hair. “I hope everyone likes what I made… I’ve never really made anybody presents before, just bought stuff... I don’t know if anyone would rather have something bought rather than my silly efforts.”

“If you put real effort and care into them, then they can’t be hated.” He shook his head. “And it’d be a – a very ungrateful person, anyway, who complains about a handmade gift instead of a store-bought one that someone worked hard on to make especially for them.”

“Well, maybe, but if what I made isn’t any good, I don’t blame anyone for not liking it.” Ahiru stared down at the floor and played with her scarf. “I wouldn’t hold it against anybody.”

“That’s because you’re kinder than most people,” Fakir said quietly. “But you’re also probably worrying over nothing again.”

“… Yeah, I do do that a lot, don’t I?” Ahiru managed a little smile as she looked up at him, and he smiled back at her, making her feel all warm and fluttery inside again. “Okay… I’ll try not to worry so much… thank you.”

Fakir started to respond, but the sound of footsteps diverted their attention. Edel emerged in her Yule finery with a basket on each arm, and nodded approvingly as she saw them. “Ah, you two are both ready to go. Good.”

“Yeah, we’ve been waiting for you.” Ahiru and Fakir both took up their baskets again, partly to make room for Edel to set hers down on the table while she bundled up. “N-not that long, though, you’re not late, I wasn’t trying to say that…”

“I know.” Edel smiled. She added a scarf, gloves, and cloak to her ensemble, as the other two had, and then retrieved her baskets. “Shall we go, then?”

They both nodded, so out the door the three went. Edel locked it behind them, and then proceeded up the path. She walked ahead of the other two; Ahiru, as the shortest, was the slowest, and Fakir hung back and walked beside her. It didn’t take long before he broke the silence. “It’s been a while since I celebrated at Charon’s.”

“Really?” Ahiru peered up at him through the gently falling snow. “How come? You didn’t want to for a while?”

“No, it isn’t that.” Fakir shook his head. “I did want to, very much – don’t get me wrong, I loved the castle, and I enjoyed being there, but at this time of year I grew homesick for all the memories of spending Yule with my father. I couldn’t get away, though – the tradition at the castle is for a boar to be set loose on the grounds for a ceremonial hunt, and then a grand feast is held that has the slaughtered boar as its centerpiece. As a knight I was required to take part in the hunt and attend the feast, and only able to visit family the day after.”

“Oh.” Ahiru frowned. “That – that seems kind of sad and unfair to all the knights, surely they want to see their families too?”

“Well, anyone still in training is released to go home – I was, before I became a fully fledged knight.” He reached over and held a low-hanging branch up so Ahiru could safely pass under, though she still ducked a little, purely by instinct. His mouth seemed to twitch with a slight smile, more fond than amused, but it disappeared so swiftly Ahiru couldn’t be sure she’d seen it. “And a couple years ago Siegfried cancelled the event entirely so he could go visit his mother, thus letting us all be free to see our families on Yule itself rather than the day after.”

“Oh, that’s good.” Ahiru adjusted the basket on her arm. “Do you think he’ll do that this year? I’m sure he wants to introduce Rue to his mother.”

“That’s what he was speaking of doing, last I heard.” Fakir shrugged. “I haven’t heard any news from the castle lately, though, so I don’t know.”

“Yeah, me either.” Ahiru thought back to all the snatches of gossip she’d picked up while on delivery or market trips, but couldn’t recall any royal news being among them. “He probably did, though, cause she didn’t attend the wedding and he’d want them to meet. They probably left quietly already.”

“I’m sure they did. Siegfried isn’t the type to make his personal excursions full of pomp and grandeur.” Fakir laughed. “Other things? Yes. But when it comes to family and friends and personal matters he likes privacy.”

“I don’t blame him, he probably doesn’t get that much as a prince.” Ahiru brushed a stray hair out of her eye. “And – oh, we’re here, we can talk about it later I guess.”

Fakir stepped forward and rapped the knocker hard against the door; a couple minutes later Charon opened it, letting warm air and tantalizing smells out to torment them. “Ah, there you all are.” He smiled. “Right on time. Come in, come in, and we’ll go relax a bit.”

“Thank you.” Edel followed him in, and Fakir hung back so that Ahiru could proceed next, leaving himself as the last one to enter. They all set their baskets down while they removed their scarves, gloves and cloaks and put them away in the appropriate places. “Do you need any help in the kitchen? I brought the items you requested along with me.”

“That’d be great, I’ve been feeling a bit harried. But…” Charon scratched the back of his head and looked over at Fakir and Ahiru. “You two don’t mind being left alone for a little bit while Edel and I finish up the meal preparations? It shouldn’t be that long, but I feel rude abandoning guests nonetheless…”

“It’s fine.” Fakir shrugged. “I can show Ahiru around a little. And I know you’d feel worse about burnt food, anyway.”

“You know me so well.” Charon smiled. “Thanks, I’ll leave you two to poke around as you like, then. Just keep your noses out of those presents!”

Fakir rolled his eyes, but he was smiling at the same time. “ _Fine._ ”

“Troublesome children,” Charon chuckled as he and Edel headed to the kitchen. Edel took one of her baskets with her, leaving the other behind; Fakir picked it back up along with his own.

“Come on,” he said as Ahiru retrieved her own. “We’ll put these away and then I’ll give you a little tour.”

“Okay!” Ahiru followed him to a medium-sized room where a large fire had been built in the fireplace. A poinsettia in pot had been set on the mantel above it, along with a basket woven from evergreen boughs and filled with clove-studded apples and oranges. On another table nearby candles and incense waited to be lit, and pillows and blankets had been piled high on the sofas that sat by the fireplace, separated by yet another small table. “Wow… it smells really good in here…”

“Yeah.” Fakir set the baskets down beneath the large window that faced out onto the woods, just beside where Charon had laid his gifts for the three of them. “And warm… feels good.”

“It really does.” Ahiru put her basket down by where Fakir had set his and then walked over to the fireplace, rubbing her hands as she basked in the pleasant heat of the flames. “You wouldn’t think we’d really need it, after such a short walk, but it feels so good, and I guess that’s cause it’s really really cold outside, so even a short walk makes us feel frozen…”

“Yeah.” Fakir moved to stand beside her, rubbing his own hands together. Ahiru tried not to stare too obviously – they were so nice and big, and looked strong, and she couldn’t forget how good it had felt those few times he’d held hers. The injury on his right hand had long since faded to a scar; it was small, but the white color stood out against his brown skin. The thought of kissing it to make it feel better despite that it was fully healed bubbled up in her, and Ahiru had to duck her head a bit and hope that the proximity of the fire would make the blush she felt spreading across her face less obvious. “And it’s the shortest day of the year, so there’ll be even less sun than usual.”

“Y-yeah, that’s right.” Ahiru swallowed. “At least the days will start getting longer after this… even though it’ll be slow.”

“Mmmm.” Fakir nodded. “I don’t mind the shorter days so much, though, and I’m in no real hurry to get to summer again.”

“Oh no, I’m not either.” Ahiru shook her head. “Like I said at the Festival, I like all the seasons… it’s just a little easier to get some stuff done when there’re more daylight hours.”

“Oh, I know.” Fakir glanced down at her hands, and then after a lengthy pause spoke again. “If you’re warmed up enough, I could show you around a little… we don’t have much to do while we wait for them to be done, after all.”

“That sounds good.” Ahiru smiled up at him. “I’d like to see everything.”

“Well, there’s not _that_ much to see,” Fakir said with a laugh as he headed out of the room. “It’s a fairly small house. Not that I ever minded that growing up or anything, but just that… it won’t take up that much time to tour.”

“That’s okay.” Ahiru followed him out. “It’s still interesting to me. And I don’t like really big houses anyway… people who have lots of money can be really silly with it sometimes.”

“In what ways?” Fakir led her down the hall and opened another door.

“Well, like my friend Pike… her family had separate rooms for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.” She wrinkled her nose. “ _And_ a separate parlor for afternoon tea. I used to get so lost, even after I’d been there a while, because there were so many rooms for so many different things… and I turned up for meals in the wrong rooms at first when I started living there…”

“That does sound confusing.” Fakir indicated that Ahiru should walk in first, and followed her in once she’d done so. “I probably would too, honestly. Oh, and this room – this is Charon’s study, or office, or… well, it serves multiple functions.” The corners of his mouth turned up in a wry smile. “So, the opposite of your rich friend’s rooms.”

Ahiru giggled. “Yeah!” She glanced around the room – a couple of tall, overstuffed bookshelves lined one of the walls, and some shelves piled high with papers and various other objects sat against the others, and near the window on the far wall sat an old and equally well-laden table, with a single chair that the last occupant hadn’t bothered to push back in. An empty, cold fireplace with a dangerously crowded mantel completed the picture. “I guess he does paperwork and filing for his business in here?”

“Yeah.” Fakir walked over to inspect the dusty bookshelves. “It’s also where he keeps all his books on smithing and whatnot, and… whatever other miscellany he can cram in that sort of makes sense.” He laughed fondly. “It hasn’t changed since I first moved in here as a child, except to get more cluttered.”

“Did you ever try to help him clean it up back then?” Ahiru peered at a wooden carving of a bird. For some reason she could picture a young Fakir being the one to nag at his father to clean up his room, rather than the other way around; the mental image made her want to giggle again.

“Yes.” Fakir sighed, but still looked amused. “I’ve always been neater than he is, and I couldn’t understand how he could possibly find anything in all this mess, and I worried myself sick over him losing things and all kinds of disasters striking because of it, so I’d fuss at him and try to push him to keep it organized, and even tried to pitch in myself.” He glanced around the room. “He was patient with me at first, but then when he came in here after a long day’s work and found me attempting to get everything neat and sorted, he finally lost his patience and had to put his foot down.” Bemusement filled his eyes. “Turns out that there’s actually some sort of weird system in here and I’d just wrecked a good portion of it, and it took him ages to get it back into place.”

“ _Really?_ ” Ahiru blinked several times as she stared around at what looked like total disorganization and chaos. “It… it doesn’t look that way to me _at all_ …”

“It doesn’t look that way to me either, trust me.” Fakir shrugged. “But I guess he has it all worked out somehow, so don’t disturb anything if you can help it. I certainly never did, not since that day. I still think it looks like a total pigsty and I’d never let _my_ room get so bad, but it’s really none of my business in the end unless he asks for help with it. Which I know he won’t – he insists it’s under control and that he doesn’t need anyone’s help, and he’s remarkably stubborn.”

“Sounds like you.” This time Ahiru did giggle. “And what you said about how you worried so much about it – sounds like you worry about nothing too, like you said _I_ do! You’re being a hypocrite again.”

“Sh-shut up.” Fakir didn’t look angry, though, despite the blush creeping across his cheeks. “A-anyway – let’s – I’ll show you more of the house now.”

“You’re just changing the subject.” Ahiru made a pouty expression, and then tried to wink at him to indicate she wasn’t serious, though her other eye partly closed so it didn’t really work. Fakir laughed softly nevertheless, sending warmth curling through her. “But okay.”

She followed him out of the study, only to collide with his back as he came to a stop in the hall. “Oh sh – hey, are you okay?” Fakir turned around in a hurry as Ahiru rubbed her nose, and laid his hands on her arms, bending down a little to peer at her. “I’m sorry. Are you hurt?”

“N-no.” Ahiru shook her head. “I bumped my nose a little, but it doesn’t really hurt, I’m fine… it’s okay.”

“All right. I really shouldn’t have stopped like that without warning you, though.” Fakir sighed. “Sorry.” He looked at her nose for a few more seconds to make sure she really hadn’t been badly hurt, and then let go of her and glanced around. “Anyway, I… think that’s it for this floor. The kitchen is occupied, and the storerooms are too small and uninteresting; the forge is in a separate building outside because of the fire risk. So… upstairs is all there is left.”

“Okay.” Ahiru nodded. “And – and don’t worry about me, it’s fine, I’ve done that too where I just stop without thinking, I think everyone does… I’m not hurt, so please don’t feel bad.”

“… All right.” He sighed again, though, before heading towards the stairs. “There’s not that much up here either – two bedrooms, a bathing room, and stairs up to a tiny attic.” He pointed at the first door they saw, over on their left. “That’s Charon’s room. I’m obviously not going to poke around in there.”

Ahiru giggled. “Yeah, I’d feel weird about that too, I wouldn’t ask you to.”

“I know you wouldn’t.” He gave her a lopsided half-smile, and then proceeded. “This is the bathing room… I just hope they’re keeping it clean.” He indicated a door on the right. “And down at the end is my old room, which Lysander has now.”

“Do you miss it?” Ahiru studied his face. “Do you wish you could live here, instead of with Edel?”

“No.” Fakir pushed some hair away from his eyes. “Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with the room and I was happy here. But I gave up that room years ago, and I’m fine with letting him have it. He needs it more than I do, after all, it’s more convenient for him as Charon’s apprentice to live here than with his family – I think he came from a farm on the outskirts of the other end of Goldkrone, so he can’t easily walk over every morning the way I can.” He shrugged. “Besides, I’m perfectly comfortable at Edel’s.”

“I can see that.” Ahiru ran her finger over the old wood of the banister, tracing a knot in it. “And really, if you think about it, moving back here would be kind of, well, moving backwards… you’re supposed to be starting a new part of your life, it only makes sense to start it while living somewhere you haven’t lived before.”

“… That too.” He glanced down at her. “That concludes the grand tour, then – I’d take you up to see the attic, but it’s pretty cramped and I imagine it’s covered with a thick layer of dust and cobwebs besides, depending on when the last time anyone went up there was.”

“What’s up there?” Ahiru peered at the little staircase she could see. “Not that I want to go in there, I’m just curious.”

“Old things. Stuff that doesn’t get used anymore and there’s no room to display.” Fakir gazed at the staircase too. “Charon’s things, stuff he inherited from his parents, things that belonged to _my_ parents, some of my old stuff too that I didn’t take with me to the castle because I didn’t need them.”

“Really?” Ahiru took a step forward. “A-are you ever going to get them out?”

“Someday. Maybe.” He looked down at the floor. “I’d have to get myself a new place to live first, though. So I don’t know.”

“Well, if you ever do decide to, I’ll help you, if you want.” Ahiru smiled up at him.

“… I’ll take you up on that.” He smiled back at her. “Anyway, let’s go back down – maybe they’ll be done by now.”

“Sounds good.” Ahiru led the way back down the stairs. “I’m _really_ hungry…”

“Then you’re in luck.” Ahiru nearly jumped into the air as she rounded the turn in the stairs and saw Charon standing at the foot of them, smiling up at her. “Food’s ready, if you two wanderers want to come in and eat.”

“We’d love to!” Ahiru hurried down the rest of the way and followed Charon into the kitchen, where Edel waited for them all to rejoin her.

Inside, the table had been set with a marvelous feast: pork chops and schnitzel with thick mushroom gravy, noodles, bread, roasted vegetables, sauerkraut, roast pork, a hearty stew, an onion pie, and cups of steaming hot spiced cider awaited them. Ahiru’s stomach rumbled as she saw and smelled it all, and she couldn’t sit down fast enough. Conversation halted as they all served themselves and began to eat, save for exclamations and comments on how good everything tasted, and thanking Charon and Edel for the delicious meal. It wasn’t until they were nearly done that anything not food related was brought up.

“So, Fakir…” Charon wiped as his mouth with a napkin. “What were you doing upstairs? Showing Ahiru everything? I hope you didn’t poke into things that aren’t yours.” He winked.

“No.” Fakir speared the last of his spaetzle and ate it before continuing. “I just showed her the second floor and told her which rooms were which. I wasn’t about to go poking around in rooms that aren’t mine.”

“Oh I know, I know.” Charon laughed. “I wasn’t accusing you of anything, just teasing – sorry.” He shook his head. “Not that you _could_ show her your old room, anyway – young Lysander keeps it locked when he isn’t in there. Acts all squirrelly sometimes if I happen to be coming up the stairs or out of my own room when he’s coming or going from it – makes me wonder if he’s hiding something.” He sipped his cider. “Probably just love poems inspired by that young lady. And it’s none of my business anyway.”

“Some people are just naturally very private.” Edel took a last bite of schnitzel dripping with gravy. “He knows he can trust you, however?”

“Of course.” Charon nodded. “I’ve told him multiple times that what he keeps in his room is his business and I’d never pry, unless I thought he was locking up some person who doesn’t want to be there. But there’s only so much you can do if someone is anxious about their privacy, you know? So I don’t laugh at him or anything, just assure him that I didn’t see a thing and wasn’t looking.” He drank the last of his cider and looked around the table. “Anyway, if you’re all done, perhaps we’ll all retire to the sitting room?”

“What about clean-up?” Ahiru asked.

“Oh, I can handle that.” He waved a hand dismissively. “Don’t worry about it, I’m not about to put my guests to work.”

“I want to help, though.” Ahiru stood up. “We ate your food and made a mess of your plates and your kitchen and everything, I feel like we should help…” She gave Edel an appealing look.

“I will help as well.” Edel also rose. “I helped prepare the meal, and should assist in the cleanup as well.”

“But –” Charon protested, only to be cut off as Fakir stood up.

“I’ll pitch in. It’s only right since this is my old childhood home.” Fakir gathered a few plates and some utensils.

“… Fine.” Charon shook his head, laughing, as he finally stood up too. “I can see I’m outnumbered. Come along, then, and we’ll get this done.

Working as a group of four, they finished the cleanup and storage of the leftovers faster than a single person working alone would’ve been able to, a fact Ahiru was keen to point out. Once it had all been done Charon gave them all plates of cookies and cake to carry, while he followed with a tray laden with utensils, small empty plates, cloth napkins, cups, and a pitcher of a drink Ahiru didn’t recognize.

“Sit down anywhere you like,” Charon said as they all arranged the various desserts on the table between the sofas. In the fireplace, the fire burned as strong as ever. “I’ll pour us all our drinks in a minute, serve yourselves whatever you like once you’ve got the appetite for it back.” He set his tray down beside the plates and headed over to the other table to light the candles and incense.

Full as her stomach was, Ahiru’s mouth watered nevertheless at the variety of sweet treats they’d brought in. There were hazelnut cookies, marzipan cookies, slices of cranberry streusel cake, linzer cookies, gingerbread cookies, and shortbread cookies. Not knowing what to choose first or if she should wait, Ahiru sat down on one of the sofas. Fakir sat down beside her, and Edel sat opposite them. “It all looks really good… I feel like I should wait till I’m less full, though.”

“That’s fine.” Charon returned and uncorked the bottle he’d brought in. “Take your time, they’re not going to go bad before you feel up to eating them.”

“That’s true.” Ahiru settled back on the sofa, and watched Charon fill the cups from the pitcher. She didn’t recognize whatever it was that he was serving them – a golden, vanilla-scented substance that was nearly as thick as pudding. “Um… what is that?”

“Eierlikör.” Charon handed Edel a cup, and she accepted it. “I take it you’ve never had it before?”

“N-no.” Ahiru shook her head. “What’s in it?”

“Not much – just eggs, sugar, vanilla, milk, and a little rum.” He handed Fakir a cup, and then gave Ahiru a quizzical look. “If you don’t want any because of the rum, just tell me and I’ll get you some more cider.”

“No, I – I think I should be okay. But…” Ahiru hesitated. “It – it doesn’t taste really eggy, does it? I don’t like the taste of cooked eggs…”

“It’s not like eating a fried egg, no.” Charon shook his head and held out a glass. “Here – see what you think. If you don’t like it, I won’t be offended.”

“All right…” Ahiru took the glass from him, and gingerly sipped it. To her relief, it tasted like vanilla-flavored custard. Well, vanilla-flavored custard that had rum in it. And to her surprise, the rum didn’t taste as strongly as she’d feared. Overall, it was a much more pleasant taste experience than she’d expected. She nodded at Charon. “I – I like it. Thank you!”

“Enjoy, then.” Charon settled back on the sofa with a glass of his own. “Now then, what’s everyone want to do first? We can do the traditional story-telling, or, if we can’t wait any longer, open those gifts.” He laughed.

“Either sounds fine with me.” Fakir shrugged, and took a drink of his eierlikör.

“I need time yet to decide which tale I will tell, so why don’t we open our gifts?” Edel set her glass down on the table. “And by the time that’s done, perhaps our appetites will have recovered enough to enjoy some dessert while listening to each other’s stories.”

“Ha, good point.” Charon set his glass down too. “Presents it is.”

They all got back up and headed over to where the gifts had been set earlier. Each person handed their gifts to the correct recipients and then returned to their places on the sofas. Ahiru fiddled with the ribbon around hers, and took another deep sip of her drink, enjoying the soothing warmth of the rum. “Um, so… who wants to go first?”

“Is that how they do things back in the city?” Charon laughed. “Nah, here we just open them all up at once and thank each other afterwards. Easier that way.”

“Oh.” Ahiru put her half-empty cup down and tugged at the ribbon, untying the bow around one of her presents. “Well… maybe it’s just a silly rich people thing, then, always doing stuff in whatever way they think is proper…”

“Could be.” Charon took a gulp, and then started in on one of his gifts. He managed to undo the cloth first, revealing a large tin. He unscrewed the lid, and found some balm inside that smelled faintly of herbs. “Ah, this looks nice. Who’s this from?”

“That would be my gift,” Edel said. “It’s a special balm designed to soothe your hands.”

“And someone who works hard with them all day certainly needs it.” Charon smiled as he replaced the lid and set the tin aside. “Thanks, Edel, I’ll definitely get some use out of that.”

“You’re welcome.” Edel opened up the box on her lap. “Ah, would I be correct in assuming that you’re the source of these fine new knives?”

“Indeed.” Charon drained the last of his drink and poured himself a refill. “You mentioned that your knives for carving those wooden charms were getting a bit dull and worn, so I decided to make you a new set. You’ve had those for what, ten years now? Now you can use something new that doesn’t have chips in the handles that make holding them uncomfortable.”

“Thank you, it’s greatly appreciated.” Edel nodded at him.

“Oooh!” Ahiru let a delighted squeal as she opened up the first of her gifts, perhaps a little louder than she realized or intended. “I – I love this!” She held up a wooden carving of a duck, beaming. “Who’s this from?”

“That’d be me.” Charon smiled and held up his hand. “Fakir happened to mention to me that you love ducks, so when the time came to think of your Yuletide gift I went to that. I’m glad you like it so much.”

“Of course!” Ahiru hugged the duck. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Fakir’s ears getting red, and she couldn’t prevent a tiny giggle from escaping her. “Thank you!” She set it down carefully and drained what little eierlikör was left in her cup. “Um, could I have a refill too?”

“Certainly.” Charon leaned across the table and took Ahiru’s proffered glass, and refilled it before handing it back to her. “Glad you’re enjoying it.”

“A lot!” Ahiru took the glass and sipped some. “Thank you!” She smiled goofily to herself as she put it back on the table and resumed unwrapping her presents.

Beside her, Fakir had uncovered a tin of his own. He lifted the lid to reveal a tea blend, dark and fragrant with spices and just a hint of orange. “I assume this is from you, Edel?” He pointed at the tin.

“Hmmm? Oh, yes.” Edel nodded. “I thought you might like it.”

“I do.” Fakir put the lid back on. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome. Oh, and…” Edel carefully tilted the box she’d just opened to show everyone the contents: a new quill and bottle of ink, and some paper as well. “Is this from you, Fakir?”

“Yeah.” He nodded. “I thought you might like a new one.”

“I do, thank you.” Edel let out a self-deprecating laugh. “I seem to have a habit of hanging onto things past their prime, often out of sentimental attachment, and letting myself get so wrapped up in everything else in my life that I forget to buy replacements. So you and Charon both have been very helpful this year.”

“Great minds think alike,” Charon commented with a laugh as he unwrapped a large jar. “Ah, this looks like… are these bath salts?” He held up the jar to the light to better see them.

“Yeah, and – and they’re from me,” Ahiru said, fidgeting slightly. “They’re a special recipe similar to that balm, it’s supposed to soothe you when you’re all sore and I thought since you do so much hard physical work, and Edel said it’s really repetitive physical work too, that that would be good for you to have… is – is it okay?” She put down the gift she was in the middle of unwrapping and took another big gulp of the eierlikör.

“It’s more than fine. It’ll be a blessing.” Charon sighed with contentment. “You have no idea how much these old bones ache at the end of a long day, to say nothing of a long week… anything that’ll ease that is more than welcome by me. And hey, maybe I can grab one of those books and finally catch up on my reading.” He chuckled. “Your gift may be beneficial in more ways than you intended. Thank you.”

“I – you’re welcome!” Ahiru beamed at him. “I’m really glad you like it, I hope you enjoy it and that it works for you!”

“So do I.” He laughed again, and set the jar down in a safe place beside the sofa. “Now then, that’s one left… looks like another jar, and by process of elimination I can figure out who it’s from.” He untied the ribbon, and pulled the cloth down. “Ah, some honey… I can always use more of that.”

“It’s infused honey, actually.” Fakir’s cheeks seemed to have gone a little pink, whether from embarrassment or the rum Ahiru didn’t know; but either way, in her current tipsy state, it looked adorable. She was still just sober enough to stop herself from leaning over and rubbing her cheek against his. “Edel and Ahiru showed me how… I got the honey from Raetsel, and infused it with some ginger and lemon.”

“Ah, two of my favorite flavors.” Charon’s smile broadened. “How thoughtful of you – I appreciate it, Fakir. Truly.”

“Y-you’re welcome.” Fakir ducked his head a little, and Ahiru drowned her giggle in another sip of eierlikör. He busied himself with unwrapping his next gift, which turned out to be a pouch containing a shiny, irregularly shaped white gem. “A… crystal?”

“A moonstone,” Charon supplied. “That one’s from me. I know you’re starting afresh in your life right now, and new beginnings are never easy, so I got you that to aid in easing your transitions and whatnot. That’s the effect they’re reputed to have, they bring luck to those who are embarking on new ventures, new beginnings, apparently they’re popular as New Year’s gifts.” He chuckled. “I’ve never known much about crystal magic, only what I hear from other people, so I hope it works for you.”

“… Thanks.” Fakir put the stone into a pocket inside his vest. “I’ll keep it close. Thank you.”

“Of course.” Charon nodded. He glanced over at Edel. “So what’s that you’ve got there?”

“A sort of sachet.” Edel held it up for all to see: a small, pillow-like thing of pieces of fabric stitched together, that smelled strongly of lavender. “Thank you, Ahiru.”

“You’re welcome!” Ahiru beamed at her. “I – I thought it might…” She paused to hiccup. “I thought it might help you sleep at night.”

“I’m sure it will.” Edel smiled. “Ah, and I see you’ve uncovered my gift.”

“Huh? Oh…” Ahiru peered down at the box she’d just opened. “Oooh!” She lifted out the little bottle, and carefully pulled the stopper out just enough for her to sniff its contents without risk of spilling it. “Oh… that smells really good… is that perfume?”

“Yes.” Edel folded a piece of cloth in her lap into a square. “I thought you might enjoy that. And the tin is a balm designed to protect and soothe your lips in the winter. I also flavored it with vanilla and mint so it doesn’t taste bad when you apply it.”

“Oooh, how nice.” Ahiru secured the stopper back in the perfume bottle, and then set the bottle down before picking up the tin and opening it. This too she sniffed, and a dreamy little smile spread over her face at the scent. “Oh… I really like this, thank you Edel… these are wonderful…”

“You’re very welcome, Ahiru.” Edel smiled. “I’m glad you like them.”

“Of course! You always make really really good stuff!” Ahiru set the box aside in a safe spot, and then went for her last gift. The ribbon untied easily, and she pulled the cloth back to reveal a sturdy, thick book. “Oh! A bread cookbook!” Her eyes lit up with joy, even as she turned to look at Fakir. “Y-you got this for _me?_ ”

“Y-yeah.” Was it her imagination, or did Fakir look even more pink in the face now? Maybe she wasn’t seeing right, or maybe he was getting kind of drunk. The thought made her want to giggle. “I – I noticed you like to bake bread, so I thought… I thought you might enjoy having some new recipes to try out…”

“I do! I will!” She hugged it to herself. “Thank you so much, Fakir, I love it!”

“Y-you’re welcome.” He coughed, and took another sip of his own drink before opening up the cloth bundle that was Ahiru’s gift to him. She set her book aside and leaned closer to him, both eager for and a little nervous about his reaction. He untied the ribbon, and pulled back the cloth to reveal a thick, soft scarf knitted from black and green and brown yarn. “Oh…” He lifted it up, rubbing his fingers over the wool.

“Do – do you like it?” Ahiru’s hands twisted a little in her lap as she watched him examine it. “Is it okay? The colors aren’t ugly? You don’t think it’ll be scratchy, do you? I – I used the best yarn I could buy, and I worked really hard on it, and I said a spell to make it keep you extra warm and safe… I – I mean, you don’t have to like it, that’s not what I meant!” She waved her hands in front of her, feeling heat that definitely wasn’t from the alcohol fill her face. “I just… well, I… I hope you like it… although I wouldn’t blame you if you hated it…” She hung her head.

“I don’t.” Fakir touched her hand to draw her attention, and she looked up to see him smile at her. “It’s… perfect. Thank you. I’ll use it to replace my old one.”

“Ah, so Edel isn’t the only one who hangs onto old things longer than she should?” Charon took another swig and laughed. “You must get that from her.”

“I – I guess.” Fakir looked away, and Ahiru tried not to laugh as she saw his ears turn red.

“Of course, that makes sense,” Charon went on. “You always did hate being fitted for new clothes, and more than once you insisted to me that a shirt was still wearable even after it was ripped and ratty and beyond salvaging, just because it was comfortable. Or because you just liked it, and you wouldn’t admit you were outgrowing it – remember that one you tried to keep past its prime even though it was way too tight for you?” He laughed, probably a bit harder than he would have if he hadn’t already downed two glasses of eierlikör and started on a third.

“No, I don’t,” Fakir said, maybe just a bit too forcefully. Beside him, Ahiru stared fixedly at the floor. Her vision definitely wasn’t what it ought to be by now, but that fact was less important to her than trying not to picture Fakir in a tight shirt, the fabric clinging to and perfectly outlining his excellent physique, and as a bonus treat unable to be buttoned up all the way. As her imagination was limited to what he looked like now it was the only way she could see him in her mind in this scenario; she grabbed a marzipan cookie and stuffed it in her mouth to avoid letting out either a giggle or a dreamy sigh. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Don’t…” Charon hiccupped. “Don’t lie to your father, especially on Yule. Not polite.” He winked and chuckled.

“I’m not lying.” Fakir served himself a slice of cake after setting Ahiru’s scarf aside, and jabbed his fork into it. “I really, honestly, don’t remember that. At all.” He put the forkful of cake into his mouth.

“Whatever you say.” Charon shrugged, and reached for a linzer cookie. “Either way, I’m sure them in charge of bookkeeping at the castle must’ve loved you, seeing as you wouldn’t be responsible for any strains on the knights’ budget.”

Fakir went very still, and Ahiru felt her giggliness evaporate as she noticed. For a moment she thought he was going to get upset in some way, and she felt bad for his good mood having been ruined by Charon’s thoughtless, inebriated comment reminding him of what he’d just lost, but after a slight pause he replied in a very neutral and even tone. “Yes… I suppose they must have.”

“This shortbread is excellent,” Edel said, speaking a bit louder than she normally did. “Did you bake it yourself, Charon?”

“No.” He shook his head and hiccupped again. “Bought it at the bakery run by that Ebine woman.” He scratched the back of his head. “Nice woman, good baker… bit spooky, though, if you ask me.”

Edel’s eyes narrowed. “I’ve never thought she was spooky.”

“Well, it’s just… she looks a bit…” Charon floundered for words. “Though, it could be just me, I’ve always been a bit spooked by people with really wide eyes like that… maybe some childhood fright or other.” He fidgeted. “Sorry if I offended you, I know the two of you are really good friends… I didn’t mean any insult, I don’t know why I…” He glanced down at the nearly-empty _fourth_ cup of eierlikör in his hand, and then set it down on the table. “Think I might’ve had too much,” he mumbled, his already flushed face going redder.

“Oh, you think?” Fakir raised an eyebrow. “What tipped you off?”

“Fakir…” Edel said warningly, but Charon shook his head.

“No, Edel, it’s fine… he’s right, I shouldn’t…” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’m sorry, everyone, I… well, let me just go splash some water on my face, and when I get back I’ll start stuffing myself with dessert, both to help me sober up and to keep my mouth shut so I don’t say anything else stupid.” He laughed a bit regretfully, and stood up. “Sorry…”

He hastened out of the room, leaving an awkward silence in his wake. Ahiru was the first to semi-recover, and hesitantly touched Fakir’s arm. “Are – are you okay?”

“I’m…” Fakir took a deep breath and let it out. “I’m fine. Really.” He reached for his glass, and drained it. “Don’t worry about me. What he said… it bothered me a little at first, but now I’m over it. I just…” He sighed. “I wish he’d remember his limits and not overdo it.”

“It’s Yule to blame, I suppose.” Edel shrugged and sighed too. “People have the tendency to overdo it precisely on joyous events such as these, when they forget all else and get caught up in the festivities. It’s why I sell so many hangover remedies right before certain holidays.”

“That’s true.” Fakir sighed again. “Honestly, I’m not really angry at him, I just –” He broke off as Charon reentered the room, carefully not looking at anyone as he sat down and began to pile sweets onto his plate.

“So…” Charon spoke around a mouthful of hazelnut cookie a minute or two later. “Storytime next, I guess, now that we’re done with the gift exchange?”

“That sounds good.” Edel set her empty glass down on the table. “Why don’t you go first, as our host?”

“Oh no, that would be a very bad idea.” Charon laughed, his sense of humor seeming to have recovered itself. “Thank you for the offer, but I’ll have to decline. I’m afraid I’ve always been terrible at it – just ask Fakir. I wasn’t even very good at reading him tales out of printed books.”

“Very well then.” Edel adjusted her skirts. “Then perhaps I’ll begin, if neither of you mind?” She looked over at Ahiru and Fakir.

“Not at all.” Fakir shook his head. “Go right ahead.”

“Y-yeah, I…” Ahiru hiccupped. “I don’t think I’ll be telling anything either, I’m no good at it and I don’t even know what I’d do…”

“Then I’ll begin.” Edel leaned forward so the firelight played on her face more, cleared her throat, and started her tale. “Once upon a time, there was a man who died.”

“Wha –” Ahiru made a small quacking noise before she could bite into the cookie she’d raised to her mouth.

“At least, that is what was commonly believed by all who knew him,” Edel continued without missing a beat. “However, his fate was rather different, at least for him. While he did indeed leave this world, unseen ever again by his family, friends, acquaintances, and rivals, his body yet lived on, longer than theirs would. As for his soul… well, it is difficult to say what became of that.”

“Oh…” Ahiru swallowed the cookie, and washed it down with a bit more eierlikör.

“His story – or rather, the important part of it – begins when he was a young man. A musician of some local renown, he was often known to take to the fields and byways to play his harp for travelers, in hopes that they might bestow upon him some coin. He fell into the habit of playing at the same places for a time, which proved to be reliable but also, eventually, dull, at least for a curious youth such as him.” Edel smoothed her skirts down. “So one day he decided to explore a road he had not gone down before, seeking adventure as well as money.

“Adventure he found, but not in the way he’d hoped, and not immediately. Deeper and deeper he wandered into a wood, until the path forked into three. Long he stood there, contemplating which road he might take first, until a fair voice spoke sweetly to him from behind.”

“Oooh…” Having finished off another cookie and the last of her drink, Ahiru drew her legs up onto the sofa and spread one of the blankets over her lap. Her tipsiness had trickled back by now, and she considered snuggling close to Fakir, but there was enough of her sobriety left to tell her that that was probably not a good idea. Tempting, yes, but not a good idea.

“The speaker turned out to be a beautiful woman in a green dress astride a horse, and she told him that each path led to a different destination: the left one to Paradise, and the right one to the underworld. And the middle one, asked the man? That one, she said unto him, leads to the Fairy Realm. Yet, unlike the others, humans may not be admitted except as prisoners.”

Out of the corner of her eye, Ahiru saw Fakir shift slightly. She couldn’t read his expression, but she had a strange feeling that he wasn’t entirely comfortable with the tale. Little wonder, given the views he seemed to hold towards the Fair Folk.

“And how might a man make himself a prisoner of the Fairies, asked the man – for his curiosity and desire for new horizons was too strong in him, and bordered on reckless. The woman smiled, and lifted her hand to indicate the apple tree that stood beside the path into their realm. A person who wished to meet the fairies – or who did not wish it and was merely hungry – had only to steal a single piece of fruit from the tree and eat of it. For the theft was considered a crime against the Realm, and punishable by seven years spent toiling there, unable to return to one’s own former life until the penance had been paid.”

Charon chose that as an inopportune moment to let out a somewhat loud burp; Edel paused and gave him a rather sardonic look, while Fakir rolled his eyes and Ahiru tried not to laugh. He turned beet red and mumbled an apology before sinking into the cushions. Once all were quiet Edel resumed telling her story, and the mood she’d created soon returned as well.

“The man considered this – seven years away from everything and everyone he knew? Could he bear such a thing? He thought hard about the village he lived in, about all those he knew within it. Friends he had there, and family, acquaintances who indulged his music, and even a rival musician who had his eye on the same pretty lass he fancied. Could he truly leave all that behind? He did not know if he could, and for a moment he wavered –

“– but his wavering heart was quelled the instant he looked once more into the lady’s eyes. Deep and fathomless they were, greener than a leaf in summer, and set in a face more beautiful and wondrous than he had ever seen. And yet it was an otherworldly sort of beauty, and deep within he realized this, and he knew: it was none other than a member of fairy nobility to whom he spoke. A grand fairy lady, perhaps the grandest of all. He knew also that he yearned, with a soul-deep yearning that he had never experienced before, to not be parted from her, to see more of her, and to go where she would go.

“His decision then was swift, as were his actions. He plucked an apple from the tree and wasted no time in biting into it. The last thing he recalled seeing, after that first euphoric taste of the sweetest fruit he’d ever chanced to eat, was the smile on the face of the fairy woman, a smile that would be imprinted on his memory forever.”

Ahiru shivered, and drew the blanket up beneath her chin. Probably that bit was meant to be romantic, but something about the way Edel said it chilled her. The smile she could vaguely picture in her head was terrifying rather than lovely.

“For seven years he remained in the Fairy Realm, made to toil at their court. Night after night he played his harp without rest until dawn, when he was then allowed a small meal and to sleep if he needed it. But the world of the fairies is a strange place, and he found himself tiring less easily, and feeling less hungry, as more and more time passed. Time itself seemed hardly to pass at all, an endless string of merriment and hunts and dancing, during which he saw the beautiful lady on many an occasion.

“But in the end it did pass, whether he could discern it or not, and by and by the fairy lady whose charms had lured him into committing his crime against her people came to him one night and bade him follow her. So entranced by her was he that he agreed without question, and to his wonder and delight was allowed to ride upon her horse with him.”

Fakir shifted on the sofa again, and Ahiru glanced over at him. She wondered if he was remembering when _they’d_ ridden together? Probably not… but it was a good memory for her, one that made her want to sigh dreamily over the details again.

“She guided her horse back to the forked road where they had met those seven years past, and instructed the man to dismount. This he did, but he cast a pleading glance back up at her. Please, he asked her, please, my lady – may I not stay with you, in your world? I have no desire to return to the realm of humans.

And he spoke true – for in the time he’d spent locked in the fairy kingdom he had lost all ties to the life he’d once led. All concern about his family and friends were gone, and the thought of the girl he’d once fancied being wed now to his rival produced only indifference in him. All his love, all his longing, all his desires, were now linked solely to the world of the fairies, and he knew somehow that if he were forced to leave it, he would wither away like a plant deprived of sunlight and water.”

“Hmph.” Ahiru glanced over at Fakir as she heard him make a derisive noise under his breath, but his expression still couldn’t be deciphered.

“The fairy lady started to tell him that he did not truly belong in her world, that he was a mere human who must return to his own people, but the man interrupted to tell her of his feelings – not just his indifference towards his former life and surety that he would waste away if made to live amongst humans again, but that he had fallen in love with her, and wished to serve her if she would have him. He would, he begged her, give anything for such an honor, if only she would consider it.

“The fairy lady smiled at that. Anything, she asked him? Anything, he told her.

“And so, they rode back together into the fairy realm, never to be seen by a living human again. What she took from him no one can say, and if he even possessed it still when he made his offer is also unknown, but what _is_ clear is that he departed this world for that of the fairies, and presumably lives there still.” Edel leaned back against the sofa. “The end.”

“Huh.” Charon blinked several times. “Well, I… guess that’s a happy ending? For him, at least, since that’s what he wanted.”

“I, I… um… I kinda thought it was creepy.” Ahiru shivered again and nestled deeper into her blanket. “I feel like she was kind of bad, and trying to lure him there on purpose, and _made_ him want to stay there so badly. Or did something to him, anyway.”

“I agree,” Fakir said, drawing Ahiru’s gaze to him. “That was my interpretation too. Fairies are never to be trusted. _Never._ ”

“Hmmm.” Edel smiled, her eyes glinting. “All I will say is that you are both very clever, and I see why you do so well in Mr. Katz’ lessons.” She leaned forward and served herself some cake. “Would you like to go next, Fakir?”

“I suppose.” Fakir shrugged. “Since neither of them want to do it, I’m the only one left.” He shifted, and straightened his posture. “No one minds?”

“Of course not.” Charon set his empty plate back onto the table. “I’ll be passing on it, like I said.”

“No, not at all,” Ahiru said, shaking her head. “Go right ahead.”

“All right.” Fakir took a last sip of his drink, and cleared his throat. “Once, long ago, a family lived in a simple stone house.”

“Ooh…” Ahiru leaned towards Fakir, unconsciously so. She hoped his story would be considerably less unsettling than Edel’s had been.

“They were a poor family but happy, for what they lacked in money they made up for in love. And even though they didn’t have enough to spend on luxuries, they never went without food and had the skills to mend their own clothes and home, so it can’t be said that they were as unfortunate as others. They were well aware of this, and so they were as generous as they could afford to be with those they knew who were worse off.”

“Oh, that’s kind… I like that…” Ahiru murmured.

“One day, however, the only lamp they owned was broken in an accident. As they required light to work and eat by when night fell, it was clear that a replacement was of immediate need. Each member of the family contributed what little they had, and by pooling it all together they had enough to go to market and purchase a new lamp.”

Fakir shifted, and crossed his legs. “They bought a beautiful red lamp from a mysterious old woman who claimed that the spirit within the lamp would keep them safe and give them all the light and heat they could ever need, that they would never want for either as long as they possessed the lamp. They scoffed a bit behind her back, as they didn’t believe in such things, but paid her and took the lamp home. However, it soon became apparent that there must have been some truth in her words, for the lamp always provided exactly the amount of light they needed, no more or less, and any room it illuminated always felt warmer when it was lit. Moreover, they found that accidents seemed to happen less often, and misfortune seemed to pass them by whenever it came near, whether in form of illness or bad crops or roving bandits.”

Ahiru stifled a yawn; she didn’t want to come off as bored with Fakir’s story when she was anything but. There was something spellbinding about his voice as he told the tale, and she wanted to listen to him forever, suddenly understanding the man in Edel’s story a little better.

“Years passed, and the children of the family grew into adults, who moved into different houses and had children of their own. Their parents aged as well, and in time were claimed by death as they slept one night. Their grieving children packed up and divided their possessions, and put the house up for sale.

“What of the lamp, you ask? You might assume that it was taken by one of the grown children of the deceased couple, even that they fought amongst themselves for the right to own the faithful, magical lamp they recalled from their childhood. But the sad truth is that the lamp had been forgotten by all of them, and sat alone in a cupboard within the empty house, overlooked and left behind.”

“Oh no…” Ahiru made a whimpering noise, and felt a lump grow in her throat.

“As the old woman had told them all those years ago, the lamp did indeed have a spirit in it, and she was very lonely without a single person to shine for, as she had during happier times. Alone in the dark she waited, longing to shine her light and warmth upon someone and bestow her protection to them, but since no one remembered her there was no one to come fetch her out of the cupboard. If she could have wept she would have, for her loneliness and hurt at having been forgotten was so great that it began to fill not just her dark cupboard, but the entire house.”

“No… poor lamp…” Ahiru’s lower lip trembled, and she wiped at her eyes. “That’s so sad…”

“Time went by, and to the lamp it seemed like an eternity. But at last her waiting came to an end, for one day, some years after the elderly couple’s passing, someone finally bought the little stone house, and moved with their wife and child into it. While cleaning up their new home and putting all their things into it, the wife found the lamp in the cupboard.

“She brought it to her husband, and together they wondered if the lamp would work. They lit it, not realizing how happy and excited the lamp spirit was at finally being found. They were delighted when they discovered that the lamp worked, and declared themselves fortunate to have made such a find. They too soon caught on to her curious properties, and though they had no idea as to their source felt that this was a lamp worth hanging onto.

“And so they did – they made sure to leave the lamp to their eldest child when they too passed on many years later, and onwards the lamp passed forward from generation to generation, even unto today.” Fakir uncrossed his legs and leaned back. “The end.”

“Awww… that… that was…” Ahiru sniffled and wiped at her eyes. “I – I really liked that, Fakir! That was so sweet! I’m so happy the lamp got a happy ending!”

“Thanks.” Fakir ducked his head a little, his cheeks reddening. “I… thought you might enjoy that one.”

“I did, I really did!” Ahiru beamed at him. “And you’re really good at telling stories too! Oh, but –” She turned to look at Edel, her eyes wide. “S-so are you, I’m sorry I forgot to say that earlier… you made it really scary and good, I’m sorry… you’re both really good…”

“I’m not offended, Ahiru.” Edel smiled. “I figured as much from your reaction before.”

“Oh… okay…” Ahiru yawned. “Th-that’s good…”

“Oh no, did you have to?” Charon yawned too. “It’s contagious, don’t you know that?”

“Sorry!” Ahiru giggled, though her laughter soon turned into another yawn.

“Heh.” Edel brushed some crumbs off her dress. “Well now, I think that might be our cue to leave.”

“R-really?” Ahiru yawned. “Awww… how come?”

“Because you’re obviously very tired, and have had a bit too much to drink,” Edel said gently as she stood up. “And so did Charon. Perhaps the two of you should sleep it off before the evening meal.”

“I hate to be rude, but I agree with her,” Charon said as he rose too, and yawned deeply again. “It’s been fun, but I feel dead on my feet after all the food and eierlikör.”

“We understand,” Edel said, and Fakir nodded in agreement.

“Yeah. I wouldn’t mind going home either.” Fakir let out a yawn of his own and stood. “But I’ll carry this stuff to the kitchen first for you.”

“No, leave it,” Charon said with a dismissive wave of his hand. “There’s not enough left that I care about letting it sit out while I rest some. Just go on home.” He paused. “That sounds awful, I didn’t –”

“I know you didn’t,” Fakir interrupted him. “I know how you meant it. It’s fine.”

“Okay. That’s…” He yawned again. “Good. Now… just let me walk you all to the door, all right?”

Ahiru stood up, the last to do so, and made a pouty face at Fakir. “How are _you_ fine? You had just as much as I did.”

Fakir’s mouth curved into a smirk. “Because I’m not a lightweight like you are.”

She scowled playfully. “Meanie.”

Fakir laughed, making her feel warm all over again. “Come on. Let’s just go home and get you to bed.”

“Fiiiiiiiiine.” She packed her Yule gifts into her basket, as did Fakir and Edel with theirs, and when that had been done she followed them to the front door, weaving a little and walking unsteadily. Once they’d bundled themselves back up Charon bid them farewell and a happy Yule, and waved them off when they’d got outside, before closing the door.

“Well, that was nice,” Edel remarked as they walked off down the path towards home. “Ahiru, I take it you enjoyed your first taste of eierlikör?”

“Yeah, I… oh…” Ahiru swayed, and stumbled, and would’ve lost her balance and fallen if Fakir hadn’t grabbed her arm and helped steady her.

“Hey, you all right?” He peered down at her. “That’s why you shouldn’t drink so much your first time, idiot.”

“I… I…” Ahiru hiccupped. “I didn’t _know_ it’d be so bad, it didn’t taste _that_ strong…”

“Tch.” Fakir shook his head. “That’s when it’s the most dangerous.” He sighed. “Do you think you can walk on your own?”

“Um…” Ahiru swallowed and looked down at the ground. Her vision spun a little, and she shook her head. “I – I don’t think so.”

“That’s what I thought. All right.” Fakir let go of her arm only to loop it around his waist, slipping his arm around _her_ waist. “Just hold onto me while we walk – we’ll be home soon.”

“O-okay…” Ahiru almost wanted to giggle, but just barely restrained herself. She did as he instructed all the way home, grateful for multiple things at once – that her hood hid her blushing face, that he was so kind as to offer this at all, that he couldn’t tell how flustered she was at holding onto him and _being_ held onto while they walked, and even, guiltily, just a little, that she’d overindulged at all so as to make this situation possible.

“Here we go.” Edel unlocked the door as they arrived, and Ahiru held back a sigh at how short a trip it really was. “I’m ready to rest up a little myself, truth be told.” She let out a yawn of her own.

“Y-yeah, it’s good to be back…” Ahiru reluctantly let go of Fakir once they were inside, bracing herself against the wall as she took off her gloves, scarf, and cloak.

To her joy, however, he took hold of her again once he’d shed his own cloak, gloves, and scarf. “Here. I don’t want you falling down on the way to your room.”

“B-but what about our presents?” Ahiru protested, though it was half-hearted at best.

“You can get yours later, idiot.” He rolled his eyes. “They’re not going anywhere. Just rest now.”

She stuck her tongue out at him, and his expression softened into a smile. “Fine.”

He took her to her room, and opened the door for her. “Think you can make it to the bed on your own from here?” In the fading light of afternoon, she could swear he was blushing again.

“Y-yeah, I think, but… but…” She hiccupped again, and then on impulse threw her arms around him in a tight hug, pressing her face into his chest. Ahiru heard him gasp in surprise, and felt him go very still. “U-um… thank you… for helping me… and also… also…”

“… Also what?” Fakir asked after a few seconds, sounding as though he didn’t know if she’d fallen asleep on her feet or not.

“Also, um…” She swallowed. “I – I never told you this, a-and I hope it doesn’t make you mad, but… but I’m actually glad you’re not a knight anymore, cause I don’t want you to get hurt.” She sighed into his chest. “There’s much better stuff you can do without swinging a sword around, and it was scary to see you hurt like that…”

Fakir didn’t speak for nearly a minute, but when he did it was in a quiet voice. “… No. I’m not mad. Don’t worry about that.” He reached behind his back and took hold of her hands so he could gently and carefully extricate himself from her embrace. “You should go to bed, though. All right?” He brushed some hair out of her face after letting go of her hands. “Just rest up and take it easy, and ask Edel about her hangover remedies when you wake up. Because you might not feel too great.” He tried to laugh.

“Oh no… you’re right…” Ahiru shuddered. “O-okay… I’ll go take a nap, then… bye, Fakir, I hope you sleep well too, a-and see you later!”

“See you.” He stepped back, and closed the door between them.

“See you…” Ahiru whispered as she listened to his footsteps traverse the short distance between the rooms, and she finally let out a soft giggle. Then she moved over to her chest of drawers – wanting to bound over there but knowing it wasn’t the best idea in her current state – and began readying herself for bed. Once she’d taken the flowers out of her hair and put it all into a single long braid she changed into a nightgown, and lit a fire in her little hearth as carefully as she could. Once she’d sufficiently warmed herself at it, she climbed into her bed and buried herself beneath the covers.

She fell asleep pretty quickly, thanks to all that she’d eaten and the alcohol she’d consumed. The time it took her to do so, however, was spent alternately sighing and giggling over Fakir, the noise muffled in her pillow until it became simply her deep, even breathing as she dozed off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eierlikör is a German liqueur similar to eggnog.


	16. Chapter 16

The hinges of her door creaked as she pushed it open; Ahiru scowled at it, as if it had personally offended her somehow. That would definitely need some oiling later – she couldn’t have it making such a loud noise when others were asleep or trying to rest, after all. Sure, everyone was awake right _now_ and she rarely left her room in the middle of the night anyway, but being quiet and considerate were nevertheless huge concerns of hers. She closed it as quietly as she could, conscious of the sound of Fakir moving around his room next door – doing what, she didn’t know, but she nevertheless liked knowing he was close by – and moved to her hearth. The fire there had gone out during the night, so she built it up again and warmed herself a little before heading back to bed. Today was meant to be a day of quiet thought and reflection, so she wanted to do it as comfortably as possible. Ahiru laid down, careful not to wrinkle her dress too much or lie on her braid, and pulled her duck pillow onto her chest so she could hug it as she let her mind wander.

The last day of the lunar year – how had it gotten here so quickly? The past few months in particular seemed to have rushed by, but now that she thought about it it felt like everything before that had flown by as well. At this time last year she hadn’t had the slightest inkling of how much her life was soon to change; in fact, she recalled lying on her bed like this with a deep sense of dread gnawing at her heart. Her guardian had introduced her to several “eligible bachelors” at Yule parties, and though they hadn’t seemed interested in her and she definitely didn’t find any of them interesting either, Herr Drosselmeyer had nevertheless made it plain to her that he definitely intended to get her married off in the coming year, and as soon as possible.  Ahiru shuddered at the memory, at the idea of being bound for life to one of those men. None of them had seemed like someone she’d wish to wed. They’d all blended into one another – each one a slightly pompous and vaguely snooty aristocrat, with similarly milky, bland looks. She’d barely been able to distinguish them at the time, and now, so much later, all their faces seemed to amalgamate into one blurry composite. Drosselmeyer had said they were of “impeccable lineages” and descended from “unblemished family trees”, and though she couldn’t quite put her finger on why, that wording had always made her deeply uncomfortable.

Of course, all his plans had been put to a permanent halt when he died not long after the start of the new year. Ahiru’s relief at that fact – as well as her guilt over that relief, for shouldn’t she feel sadder over his death even though she hadn’t been fond of him? – soon became overshadowed by pure terror when it became clear just how ruinous a financial state she was in now, thanks to him. It had all worked out in the end, of course, when her path led her here, but those first few months after his death had wreaked havoc on her emotional state. Her assumptions when he passed were that she was free of his efforts to marry her off, free to live on her own with the modest inheritance from her parents, but her discovery that he’d squandered most of that in addition to throwing away his own money crushed those hopes. The house she’d lived in most of her life and all its furnishings, as well as many of her own belongings, had been yanked out from under her and sold, leaving her homeless and penniless. Pike’s parents had graciously taken her in at their daughter’s request, but Ahiru had known all along that it wasn’t permanent. Since the possibility of marriage had dried up completely when she’d lost her money (for even if she _had_ been considered beautiful by any of the city’s rich bachelors, none of them would want a penniless girl mired in the scandal her guardian had left behind as his final legacy), employment had been her only hope. Her gratitude to Edel for being the one to finally give her a chance after so many others had rejected her would last a long, long time; the rest of her life, in fact, in all likelihood. It didn’t feel like an exaggeration to say she owed her everything. Or nearly everything, at the very least.

Getting a home and steady employment had made a world of difference in her life these past few months. It had been nerve-wracking at first, of course, as she struggled to settle in and deal with her fears over all that she had to learn, but now she was finally starting to feel like a true resident of Goldkrone and had gained some confidence in herself as a witch. It certainly helped that Edel was by far the best teacher she’d ever had (though a close second did go to Mr. Katz, she reminded herself), and that everyone had been so warm and welcoming to her, but she knew things wouldn’t be nearly as happy for her if she hadn’t possessed enough aptitude with the job to make it work. Luckily, she’d taken to it almost immediately, finding it interesting and fun and not as intimidating to actually do as she’d feared. It seemed now that witchcraft had been her true calling all along: not only because the work itself was stimulating and came naturally to her once she knew what she was doing, but because even more importantly it allowed her to help people, to make their lives better and easier and ease their pain. She’d seen the difference she and Edel made in the lives of their patients and customers, and it meant the world to her. Few things brought her as much true joy as helping people and making them happy.

Right now, however, she was meant to be reflecting on her _own_ happiness, her own state of being as compared to how it had been last year at this time, how much the past year had altered her. Was she happier now than she had been back then? The answer was a resounding and unhesitant yes. Far from having her stomach churning with anxiety and dread over the prospect of an unhappy future, she now had security and contentment. She had a job, a home, and friends, and found joy in all of them. Last Yule had been anything but a happy affair, preoccupied as it had been with meeting men she had no desire to marry, but this year it had been spent the way it was truly meant to be: with new friends and full of warmth and good cheer.

 _And alcohol too_ , a little voice reminded her, and Ahiru hid her face in her duck pillow as heat suffused her cheeks. She remembered her behavior at the little gathering rather fuzzily after a certain point in the evening, thanks to the amount of eierlikör she’d consumed. Her memories were clear enough to give her no small amount of mortification, however, as she recalled how she’d acted at the end. She had the comfort of knowing she’d restrained herself well up to that point, and that what she’d done hadn’t been _that_ bad, but all the same she’d been in a world of embarrassment when she woke up later that evening. Too frightened of facing Fakir after her impromptu hug and blathering about her desire to not see him hurt anymore, she’d stayed in her room until after she was sure he’d already gone to bed, only then tiptoeing into the kitchen to get some water and a bit of food to fill her empty stomach. The anxiety over having made things horribly awkward for him made her unable to really eat to her satisfaction, however, and so she’d returned to her room with a half-full stomach and a pounding headache. A bit of pain reliever and a few drops of a sleep aid potion helped her drop back off to sleep after she’d stayed up late worrying over it all and making her symptoms worse, and in the morning she felt a little better in body, if not in mind. To her relief Fakir had behaved like his normal self at the breakfast table and hadn’t brought up the hug, instead expressing concern for her physical state after having gotten intoxicated and offering her helpful tips and stories about what he’d been through and seen others gone through. That had finally untied the knots in her stomach, and she relaxed and enjoyed a happy post-Yule breakfast with him.

The world itself seemed to have slowed down and quieted in the wake of Yule’s conclusion. With a major holiday over and done with and nothing else on the horizon until mid- February she and Edel had seen their workload lessen and, perhaps for the first time since the royal wedding, life settled into a comfortable routine. It felt like a sort of winter calm – as though the snow blanketing everything had had some sort of soporific effect on Goldkrone, the way a warm blanket on a cold day did, and though they knew it would be temporary they appreciated the breather nonetheless. Ahiru found herself with free time again, and she spent some of it reading the new book from Mr. Katz and making notes on her reactions, and discussing some passages with Fakir when he was around.

 _Fakir_ … Ahiru hugged her pillow a little tighter as her thoughts drifted to him. It would’ve seemed so improbable when they’d first met, but now he meant so much to her. She had other friends, of course, but what she had with Fakir was a bit different, and not just because she was deeply attracted to him. There was a level of comfort and closeness there that she wasn’t sure she’d felt with anyone else in her life up to now, and they shared things with each other that they couldn’t seem to talk about with anyone else. It certainly didn’t hurt that they spent a lot of time together, more than she spent with any of her other friends – he was away a lot during the day because of his work at Charon’s, but when he was around they liked to talk a lot, and make trips into town together, and now they were going to start taking lessons with Mr. Katz together too. Ever since he’d moved in with her and Edel they’d fallen into an ever-growing closeness thanks both to their proximity and their natural rapport with each other (not to mention the way they’d bonded during his convalescence after his injuries), and she felt happy each day to have him in her life. His rude, brusque exterior at their first few meetings had given way to reveal a kinder, gentler, and surprisingly shy person within, who simply had trouble making friends and being close to people. She had no idea what about herself could possibly have been different for him from everyone else that he felt able to open up to her, but she was glad of it, whatever it was, for she truly cherished his friendship. She doubted he’d ever come to be as attracted to her as she was to him, but being able to be good friends with him was more than enough, and keeping that bond motivated her to hide her crush lest she make things awkward and uncomfortable in his new home that he was probably still adjusting to.

It was with something of a start that she jerked out of what felt like dozing off some time later. Ahiru blinked up at the ceiling; had her room gotten a little brighter? She sat up, yawning, and peered out her slightly open window. The sky still looked cloudy and overcast, but it had indeed brightened, and she could see a little pale blue sky peeking out in places. Her duck pillow felt warm against her body, and she yawned again as she tried to figure out if she really had slept, and for how long. The last thing she remembered thinking about was something to do with Fakir, though she wasn’t sure what, and then… nothing until she woke up. She hadn’t stayed up _that_ late last night, and she hadn’t felt tired before she laid down, so likely it was simply an effect of lying around and not doing anything but thinking, in a room that now felt toasty and warm despite the open window, thanks to the fire she’d built up in the hearth. That had to be the culprit.

Ahiru didn’t want to take a morning nap, however, so she set her duck pillow aside and rose from the bed. She smoothed her skirts down and tucked some hair behind her ear before marching over to her door and pulling it open, wincing again at the creaking noise. She couldn’t hear anything from Fakir’s room, and she hoped fervently that he hadn’t fallen asleep too, only to be woken up by her squeaky hinges. She promised herself that she’d fetch the oil can when she went back to her room and then headed down the hall.

Her feet took her to the library, which to her relief was empty and quiet. She wouldn’t be punished for getting bored and wanting to do something else besides reflect on the past, but it nevertheless would’ve been awkward to find Edel in here and have to explain what she was doing. Then again, wouldn’t Edel’s presence have been for the same reason? Probably, unless Edel felt better able to think and reflect amongst the books. She wasn’t sure if that was the case with her, but for some reason she could picture Fakir finding some measure of peace and inspiration among them. She couldn’t decide if it was too bad he wasn’t here, as she would’ve enjoyed his company, or good, because she’d hate to bother and disturb him.

Ahiru justified abandoning her self-reflection by seeking out books that might have information about changelings, a subject she’d meant to research since November but between one thing and another hadn’t had the chance to actually start reading about. She knew she was meant to be also thinking about what the year ahead might hold for her, and coming up with plans and goals, but there really wasn’t that much to think about or plan. Her main ambition for the coming year had been set in stone since September, after all: to keep learning witchcraft and helping people as best she could with it. What else was there for her? It sounded so dismissive to put it like that, but it _was_ the major focus of her life and energies at this point. She’d maintain her friendships as well, and work to be a better person, but that wasn’t anything new either. And unlike, say, Lilie, she had no hope of getting married this year or any other, so she couldn’t exactly focus on working towards _that_. All in all, it looked to be a fairly uneventful year filled with lots of hard work and learning, which was good but didn’t make for extended self-reflection and complicated planning.

It took her a little while, but at last she found a few books that looked like they might be helpful and informative on the subject. Embers smoldered in the fireplace, indicating that someone had been in here at some point earlier today, so Ahiru turned them into a small blaze before settling down in an armchair nearby and draping one of the blankets Edel kept in here over her lap. It occurred to her just as she got comfortable that maybe a cup of tea would’ve been the perfect thing to complete all this, but as she didn’t feel like getting back up and out of the cozy little nest she’d created for herself she’d have to make do without it. So she opened up the first book, and began to flip through to the section she wanted.

To her disappointment, however, the book’s entry on changelings was entirely devoted to practical advice on how to avoid having one substituted for a human infant. Which was good, of course, as people needed to know such information, but it wasn’t what she was specifically looking for at the moment. Ahiru set it aside with a sigh and moved on to the second of four tomes she’d found that seemed likely to have _some_ sort of material on the matter. That one turned out to be much the same as the first, though it had added tips for what to do with a changeling if you turned out to have one. This she read with interest and, as the advice grew more violent, horror. The first few scenarios left the changeling child alive and intact with its original parents and the stolen human baby back with its true parents as well, but the last few advocated courses of action that physically abused or even outright killed the changelings. What also struck her was that the behavior of the changelings in the initial anecdotes was much more… oh, what word was she looking for? Fantastical? Unreal? She wasn’t sure, but she knew that none of it sounded like anything a real human baby would realistically be capable of. The latter tales, however, seemed more to relate stories about children who behaved in subtler ways that could easily be mistaken for symptoms of certain disorders that sometimes arose in humans. It made her wonder how many fully human children had been mistaken for changelings and made to suffer horrible things as a result. It was truly horrifying to think about, and her heart ached for them all.

The third book focused on this grim possibility too, as part of a longer, deeper analysis on the origins of changeling stories and the variety of them, as well as examining their veracity. The author of that book took a distinctly skeptical approach to the whole matter, expressing doubt about whether or not changelings were actually real and pointing out the lack of hard sources of information or proof in comparison to the wealth of hearsay and the probability that errors had been made by paranoid people. That the fairies should be regarded with a healthy amount of trepidation and that precautions ought to be taken around those vulnerable to mischief they did not dispute, but they also emphasized common sense and to not take every wild tale you heard as fact.

Most of the types of tales were fairly typical stories warning against carelessness on the part of new parents, and the book dissected the variants and what they implied about cultural norms and values. It set aside for last a kind of story quite different from the rest: _A ghastly subset of tales posits that the fairies will also take children that are freely offered to them by desperate or greedy parents seeking a boon. All the tales follow the same course of events: the parents approach the fairies with their predicament or desire, the fairies carry out the favor, and then the unfortunate infant is taken into the fairy realm, never to be seen again. No hard evidence exists, of course, that such a thing has ever happened, but it is a narrative thread about the Good Neighbors that took root so firmly in the public consciousness that many fictional stories were spun about similar events. They mainly exist as cautionary tales against human flaws such as greed and shortsightedness, with the parents receiving their wish but at an unintended additional cost, or not precisely as they wanted due to the Fairy King seizing upon some chance for mischief provided by careless wording. The parents are thus left unhappy, unfulfilled, and childless, and sometimes even ostracized from their community for their misdeed, serving as a lesson to us all to not repeat their mistakes. Some tales, however, take a somewhat romanticized view of the whole affair and provide a happy ending in which the child handed over is able to return to the human world through either their own cunning or the deeds of their true love, whom they chanced to meet in unlikely - and sometimes improbable - circumstances. It must be noted that while this may technically be possible, it would not occur without some sort of dire payment being extracted from an involved party, a fact that these romantic yarns gloss over or ignore entirely._

The next section moved on to tales of people abducted by fairies and the methods by which a loved one could attempt to rescue them; Ahiru closed the book and leaned back in her chair, frustration bubbling up in her not for the first time and likely not for the last either. _Why_ couldn't she have had more exposure to all this back in the city? Every time a conversation here came round to the subject she had to reveal how little she knew, and she felt awkward and ignorant and foolish. It was true that she'd been safer back then from the Fair Folk than she was here and now, but why did that have to affect how a person was educated? All this was fascinating and intriguing, and that should have been reason enough for her to learn it much sooner. Would she ever catch up to everyone in Goldkrone? The sheer wealth of information available felt overwhelming, and she couldn't help but feel like she'd always be one step behind everyone else.

The fourth book she’d picked up was merely a collection of changeling tales through the ages, with nothing offered up in the way of sources or discussion of how much truth, if any, there was to them. Ahiru didn’t find that particularly off-putting, however, and settled down deeper in her chair to simply enjoy them as entertainment and food for thought. She whiled away nearly two hours, spellbound by the stories until the chiming of the clock on the mantel broke the enchantment. A startled look up at the clock’s face revealed it was the lunch hour, and she abruptly realized that her stomach felt extremely empty. It might have been comfortable enough in the chair to avoid getting up for tea earlier, but not enough to keep her from food. Ahiru set her book aside, pushed the blanket off, and hurried back to the kitchen.

Instead of Edel at the stove, though, she found Fakir, cooking meatballs in a fragrant sauce along with spaetzle and some cabbage. He had his back to her, but turned at the sound of her footsteps on the floor. “Hey. You hungry?”

“Yeah.” Ahiru nodded, and looked around. “Where’s Edel? Still in her room?”

“No, she left.” Fakir turned his attention back to the food. “Went to Ebine’s, since she – Ebine, that is – doesn’t like to be alone too much today. She said she’ll be back before dinner, though.” He paused, and then glanced back. “You… don’t mind that I’m cooking, do you? I know I’m not as good as she is, but –”

“No! Oh no, I don’t mind at all!” Ahiru interrupted him, waving her hands in front of herself as her eyes went wide. “I just was surprised she wasn’t in here, I like your cooking a lot, you’re better at it than you think, and… and yeah.” She swallowed, cutting herself off before she made some kind of remark about it being nice to have lunch as just the two of them.

“… Thanks.” The corners of his mouth lifted in a small smile and his cheeks gained a dusting of pink. He turned his attention back to the food again. “Anyway, it should be done soon, so go ahead and sit down if you want.”

“Okay.” Ahiru smiled at him even though he couldn’t see her. “Thank you, by the way, for making lunch… I got so caught up in reading in the library that I didn’t even notice the time.” She pressed the tips of her index fingers together over and over while she stared at the floor. “If it had been left to me we wouldn’t have eaten for a while…”

“I don’t mind.” Fakir started brewing the tea. “Don’t feel bad about it.”

“I…” Ahiru blinked. How had he _known_ without looking at her that she was starting to feel guilty? “Okay… thank you…”

“It’s no big deal.” He took out a couple of teacups, and brought over honey and milk and cutlery for them as she sat down. Their hands brushed as she reached for a spoon, and a shiver went through her. “I’ll – I’ll pour you some tea as soon as it’s done brewing, and then you can serve yourself the food? Is that all right?”

“Of course.” Ahiru nodded. “Thank you – I really do appreciate it, a-and don’t say it’s nothing, it’s not, you went to all this work to make food for both of us instead of just yourself, you could’ve just made stuff for you and then left me to fend for myself but you didn’t.”

“I know I could have.” Fakir went back to the stove and checked on the tea. “Technically. But that would’ve been… well, I’m not perfect, I know that, but I like to think I’ve been raised better than to do _that_.”

“That’s cause you’re really a nice person.” Ahiru fidgeted in her seat. “I – I know I said you were rude when we first met, and I guess you kind of were, and I thought you weren’t very nice, but now… now I feel like I understand you a lot better and I know you better now and… yeah.” She stared down at the table, unable to look at him even though he still presumably had his back turned. “I – I’m sorry, I know that sounds mean, I just…”

“It doesn’t.” He spoke in a quiet voice. “I didn’t exactly give you the best first impression of me, so I don’t blame you for thinking the worst of me.”

“No, I – I wouldn’t say it was the _worst_ , and technically my first impression of you was when you saved me, although I didn’t really absorb anything except that you were really good at fighting and I was grateful to you, just…”Ahiru squirmed. “Um, I guess what I’m trying to say is… I’m glad we got to know each other better, you know? I’m sure I didn’t come off wonderfully either.”

“You were… you were fine.” Fakir cleared his throat, and poured tea into the cups. “Don’t worry about that. You’ve never said anything that made you come off badly, and certainly not the way I did to you.”

“I don’t know about that, I mean… you haven’t known me _that_ long, not for years and years anyway, I mean I feel really comfortable around you and all, but you haven’t known me all my life, you know?” Ahiru bit her lower lip. “I’m sure I’ve said bad stuff without knowing it.”

“Maybe.” Fakir shrugged. “I find it hard to imagine though. Anyway…” He finally turned around and brought the cups over, setting one in front of her and the other at the place across from her. “Tea’s ready, so go ahead and sweeten it, or get your food – whichever you want to do first.” He turned away again, and she thought she saw a hint of red on his ears as he walked back to the stove and began spooning noodles onto his plate.

“Okay! Thank you!” Ahiru debated it for a moment, and then got up to join Fakir at the stove. Their hands brushed again as she took the spoon from him to get some meatballs, and her heart beat a little faster at the contact. Part of her wanted to lean her head against his arm, but it was a remarkably inappropriate time, place, and impulse, so she restrained herself and concentrated on filling her plate with food.

Once they’d both served themselves they sat back down and prepared their tea the way they liked it. It gave Ahiru a special thrill to note – not for the first time – that the way Fakir preferred his was so much like hers. One more thing they had in common. Fakir waited to take a bite until after she’d sampled hers, twisting his fork around in the noodles while she chewed. “Is it okay?”

“Of course it is!” Ahiru said once she’d swallowed down the first bite. “It’s really really good, Fakir, thank you! Don’t worry that it tastes bad or anything, cause it doesn’t!” She speared a meatball along with some cabbage, and took another big bite. “Mmmm…”

“… All right.” His shoulders seemed to relax at that, and he finally took a bite. “Thanks.”

“Yeah, don’t worry.” Ahiru took a sip of her tea. “I don’t think I could hate anything you made, cause like I said you’re really good at it.”

“Mmmm.” Fakir ducked his head a little, not looking at her, and twisted his fork around in the noodles some more before resuming eating. They ate in silence for a couple minutes, and then he spoke up again. “So… you… said you were reading earlier?”

“Yup.” Ahiru nodded. “I’d been lying down and thinking about stuff like you’re supposed to but then I kind of dozed off, I don’t know for how long… but I thought it’d be better to get up and go sit somewhere instead of just lying down cause I didn’t want to go back to sleep so I went to the library to read.” She put a forkful of spaetzle into her mouth and happily chewed on them.

“I see.” Fakir shifted in his seat. “Honestly, I considered doing the same thing, but by the time I made a decision it was close enough to lunch time that I thought I should come in here and fix the food for us since Edel had just left and wouldn’t be doing it. I probably would’ve disturbed you anyway, so it’s for the best.”

“Oh no, not at all!” Ahiru gulped down some tea and shook her head. “I wouldn’t have minded at all, we could’ve both just sat there and read whatever we wanted, or talked, or… it would’ve been nice, you know? You wouldn’t have bothered me, I…” She lowered her gaze to her food, her fork tapping against her plate and heat spreading through her as her heart began to race. “I like it when we get to do stuff together, I have fun with you, I hope you know that… I don’t ever think of you as a bother.” She swallowed hard. “I – I probably annoy _you_ , though… sorry…”

“You don’t.” She still couldn’t look at him, so she didn’t see his expression, but he sounded genuine, if a bit shy and nervous. She couldn’t blame him – friendship and expressing his feelings were things that still weren’t easy for him. “Not at all. You have nothing to apologize for. I…” He paused. “I… enjoy your company too. So don’t worry about bothering me or anything idiotic like that.”

“O-oh, that’s – that’s good, I’m… I’m glad.” Something like giddiness bubbled up in her at his words; once upon a time hearing him call her an “idiot” had hurt her feelings, but now that she knew it was merely his really weird and awkward way of showing concern and caring it made her feel strangely happy every time he said it. “Cause – cause I don’t want you to feel like you should rush to get out of here when you’re not ready yet because I’m really annoying and you can’t stand being around me, I want you to be able to take your time and do what’s best for you at the right time, I don’t want to influence you in a bad way…”

“I don’t feel like that at all.” He drank some of his own tea. “In fact, I… well…” He shifted in his seat.

“You what?” Ahiru leaned forward over the table, and one of her feet brushed his leg as she started to swing them; she withdrew in a hurry and hoped he hadn’t noticed. “What is it, Fakir?”

“I… I wanted to ask you…” He turned his head to stare at the wall. “Well, first of all… what are you doing after lunch?”

“After lunch?” Ahiru blinked. “I, um… I don’t know,” she admitted. “I didn’t really have anything planned. Why?”

“Well, because… I was thinking of going for a ride, and I thought…” He set his fork down and picked it up again, and then set it back down. “You said you wanted to learn to ride, so I thought maybe you’d like to go with me… but if you have something else you’d rather do or you don’t feel like it now, you don’t have to, it was just a thought.”

“No, no! I mean yes! I mean…” Ahiru squirmed a little. “I mean… sorry, I didn’t say any of that right, I’m so stupid and bad with words sometimes… I meant to say that no, there’s nothing else I’d rather do, or – or yes, I’d love to do that, but it came out all wrong, sorry…”

“You have nothing to apologize for, and you’re not stupid.” Fakir paused for a minute. “Wait, so… you do want to?”

“Yes!” Ahiru nodded so enthusiastically that her braid flew up into the air a little. “I really do, that sounds like fun!”

“… Okay.” He let his breath out as if he’d been holding it. “So… we’ll finish eating and clean up, and then go? Is that all right?”

“That sounds good to me! Oh, but…” Ahiru paused just before putting another bite of food into her mouth, a thought occurring to her. “Is – is it really okay to take your horse out into the snow? Is it safe?”

“As long as the proper precautions are taken, yes.” Fakir nodded, and his eyes finally met hers. “I already visited the farrier some time ago to prepare – I had him fitted with new shoes that are better and safer for the winter. I also know a good route, and the snow isn’t so heavy right now, and I have other precautions in mind as well. Don’t worry about it.”

“Okay, that’s good.” Ahiru chewed on her food and swallowed it, then washed it down with more tea. “I mean, not that I don’t trust you, I just… I don’t know anything about horses so I just wanted to make sure, I guess, I don’t want to do anything to hurt him just so I can learn, I mean…” She ran her finger over her teacup. “I don’t know what I’m saying…”

“It’s all right. I understand.” He got the last of his noodles onto his fork and ate them. “I wasn’t offended. It’s good that you asked, because if you’re going to learn to ride you need to learn other things as well. Don’t be afraid to ask questions.”

“Oh, okay.” Ahiru brightened. “I – I’m really looking forward to it, we haven’t gotten to go since that time just before Halloween… well, that was the _only_ time, but still…”

“Yeah.” Fakir set his fork onto his plate, and drained the last of his tea. “And while I could let Asim rest and wait out the rest of the winter, I’d prefer to give him some exercise so he doesn’t get bored and restless and unhappy. And I’m a bit restless myself, honestly.”

“Yeah, I understand that.” Ahiru gulped down the rest of her own tea. “I love winter but it’s not as fun if you don’t go out and actually play in the snow, you know? Well, not really _play_ , maybe, but you know what I mean, you can’t just stay in the house all the time. Not that that isn’t fun too, just… it’s better not to do too much of it or you get bored and restless and want to go out.” She stacked her fork and cup onto her now-empty plate and stood up. “I want to go outside too, I feel like I’ve been kind of cooped up inside a lot lately and it’d be really fun to go out with you and try riding again.”

“That’s how I feel too.” Fakir rose as well, and carried his things over to the sink for washing. “I feel like I’ve been sitting for too long and need to stretch my legs. I mean, I haven’t been sedentary, but I _have_ been spending most of my time indoors, whether here or at the forge.”

“Y-yeah, I…” Ahiru swallowed, and concentrated on cleaning the dishes they’d used. “I know you stay nice and warm in the forge, but I bet you’d like to get some fresh air, a-and this is a different type of exercise too…” She couldn’t forget the way his legs had looked in those snug pants that day at the well, or how he’d come home the other day with his coat and cloak off and shirt open a little; she’d fussed over him catching a cold while trying not to stare at the bit of exposed chest and the sweat that glistened on it, but he’d told her that it’d been so hot in the forge that even the walk home hadn’t properly cooled him down. She’d conceded the argument and kept to herself the information that seeing him like that had made _her_ need some way of cooling down.

“Exactly.” Fakir took a wet dish from her, and began to dry it. “It’ll be good for all of us to do this.”

Ahiru murmured an agreement, and then they fell into a comfortable quiet as they worked to clean and dry everything they’d used. When they finished putting it all away, they both headed to their rooms to get themselves ready to go. Ahiru practically skipped back to the front hall to meet him, her heart fluttering as she saw him waiting for her, his gloves and scarf and cloak already on and his shoes changed to boots she assumed were better for riding. “I – I’m all ready! Sorry if I took too long!”

“You didn’t. It’s fine.” He picked up the bridle from the table and slung the bag he’d packed over his shoulder while she put her own cloak, scarf and gloves on. “Come on, let’s go.”

“Okay!” Ahiru followed him out the door, and locked it behind them before they set off up the road to Charon’s, where Fakir stabled his horse. The snow crunched under their feet as they walked, and she noticed that he once again was careful to match his pace to hers so that she didn’t get left behind. Warmth filled her as she realized it; few people in her life had ever bothered to do that for her. Most people she’d known preferred to get impatient with her and scold her for not keeping up better, as though it was her fault she was so much shorter and couldn’t match their longer strides. But Fakir never said a word and merely kept pace with her rather than expecting her to rush to catch up with _him_. How could she not be endeared by that?

They didn’t bother going to the main house when they got there, instead proceeding straight to the stable. Fakir laid a blanket over Asim’s haunches before putting on the saddle. “This will prevent his muscles from getting chilled while we ride,” he explained as he saw her curious expression.

“Oh, that makes sense.” Ahiru watched him attach a couple of things to the saddle. “Cause he’s used to being in here and not outside, right?”

“Yeah.” Fakir made a few final adjustments, checked things over to make sure they were secure, and then turned to Ahiru. “All right, everything’s ready… we’ll get you mounted up first. I…” He looked around the small stable, and sighed. “Damn. Charon must’ve needed the stool… do you want me to go try and get one from the forge?”

“N-no, that’s okay, that seems like extra trouble.” Ahiru shook her head. “Besides, we managed without one that first time, remember?”

“… True.” He glanced away for a moment. “Then… come over here and I’ll help you up.”

“A-all right.” Her insides fluttering in anticipation, Ahiru followed him as he led Asim out of the stable, and stood beside it once he’d stopped. Fakir closed the stable doors and then moved to stand behind her, and after a split-second’s pause lifted her by the waist so she could climb on. It was only slightly less of a struggle for her than the last time, but at least this time she didn’t nearly shove her backside into his face. “Th-thanks…” She adjusted her skirts as she settled herself in the saddle, feeling heat in her cheeks.

“Not a problem.” Fakir swung himself up into the saddle behind her as easily as he had on their previous ride. Ahiru swallowed, and her heart started racing again as she felt him press up against her back and loop his arm firmly around her waist to hold her in place. She would definitely need to deal with these… _stirrings_ inside her tonight before bed, as quietly as possible so he didn’t suspect what was going on in the next room. “Ready to go?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “We – we can go any time.”

“All right.”

He tugged on the reins, and Asim began trotting down the path. Fakir kept him going at a slow but steady pace, and directed him around any possible obstacles. He seemed to know exactly where he was going, and Ahiru relaxed against him much as she had the first time. Being so physically close to Fakir was a strange, complicated thing – both exciting and relaxing at the same time somehow. And while she didn’t want to get too familiar with him and make him uncomfortable, _she_ also did feel very comfortable being with him like this. It was incredibly enjoyable overall, however, so she settled herself in to have a good time and tried not to think too hard about certain things.

“So, um… where are we going?” Ahiru asked after a few minutes of riding. “Do you have a specific destination in mind or something?”

“Yeah.” Fakir tugged on the reins again to gently steer the horse. “There’s this meadow… not the same one we rode through back in October, but you mentioned the other day that you wanted to get some snowdrops, and they grow there in the winter, so I thought… I thought maybe you’d like to go there. Is that all right?” He sounded like he was trying _not_ to sound nervous, and she thought for a moment that she could feel his heart beating a little faster against her back. It almost made her want to laugh, because who was he to call her silly for worrying over nothing when he was clearly doing the same thing right now? What could there possibly be to worry about here? But she kept her laughter inside, so as not to hurt his feelings.

“Of course it is.” Ahiru smiled to herself, and unconsciously leaned back against him a little more. “That sounds really nice, thank you… thank you for thinking of me…”

“It’s nothing, I probably would’ve gone there anyway.” He shifted slightly. “There’s a small brook there for him to drink from, and it’s an ideal spot to rest.”

“That’s good, cause I wouldn’t want to go to a bad or inconvenient place just so I could get flowers.” Ahiru brushed a leaf off her skirt. “Oh, it’s so nice to be out, though… I’m glad you had this idea, and that you invited me to come along.”

“So am I. The fresh air feels good.” Fakir shifted a little again as he guided Asim, and Ahiru fought down the urge to turn herself enough to snuggle into his chest. “I needed to do _something_ this afternoon… it would’ve been boring otherwise and I didn’t feel like staying cooped up inside.”

“Boring? What do you mean?” Ahiru turned her head slightly, but then stopped. “You don’t like the whole self-reflection stuff we’re supposed to do?”

“Not particularly. Or not right now, at least.” She felt him shrug. “I did plenty of that while I was laid up in bed injured, I don’t really need to do anymore so soon. And I know we’re supposed to also think about the future, but I’m… not really thinking in the long-term when it comes to that. I… I’m trying to just live each day as they come and take things slowly.”

“That makes sense.” Ahiru nodded to herself. “Are you happy, though? Is it working out for you, or are you still sad, or –” She stopped, biting her lip. “No, I… I’m sorry, I shouldn’t ask about that… sorry…”

“It’s fine. I don’t mind talking about it with you, and I know you mean well.” He fell silent for a minute, and then spoke again. “The thing is, I… when I think about it all too much I _do_ get depressed. It’s hard not to. But as long I distract myself with – with things I enjoy, then I’m fine, and it’s not so bad. So I’m better off not lying around dwelling on it. It’s better for me to do things like this. That’s part of why I wanted to take those lessons with Mr. Katz: the books are a good distraction.”

“Yeah, I understand.” Ahiru relaxed a little. “A-and I’m not really into it either, the whole reflecting on the past year thing… I think that’s why I kind of fell asleep a little earlier.” She laughed sheepishly. “I think we’re both better off doing other stuff, a-and that’s okay, cause everyone’s different and it doesn’t make us bad people or anything… it’s not like we don’t reflect on stuff and our own behavior at other times of the year, and I already have my future goals for next year worked out, and you’re not thinking in the long term and that’s okay too…”

“… Yeah. I guess you’re right.” His voice was soft. “I was… thanks. I was starting to feel like I was being… something of a coward for taking this approach to the future… as if I’m trying to run away from it.” He shifted again. “Honestly, I still don’t know if I am or not.”

“I don’t think you are.” Ahiru shook her head. “You’re just taking it slowly, and that’s okay, like I said. Cause you just went through a pretty big change, and you don’t know what to do next, and it’s okay to take your time and decide, and to try and get the most out of life every day while you do. You probably felt really scared when you got injured like that, so it’s understandable that you want to try to live every day to the fullest or whatever now.”

“… Yeah.” Fakir steered the horse away from a snowdrift. “That’s… I’d like to do that, yeah.”

“Then you should do it, definitely.” She laid her hand on his arm, the one that still encircled her waist, and gave him an encouraging little squeeze. “Just as long as you’re happy, that’s the most important thing… I want you to be happy, cause you deserve it.”

“… Thanks. I’ll… try.”

They rode along quietly for a while longer; Fakir slowed Asim’s pace down to a walk for the last ten minutes before they got to the meadow he’d talked about. The brook babbled softly at them as they rode up, and Fakir stopped not far from it. He dismounted first, which made her almost sigh at the sudden departure of his warmth from against her body, and then turned expectantly towards her with an outstretched hand. Her disappointment at not having him pressed close to her anymore immediately transformed into anxiety. “O-oh, um… is that how I get down? I… I forgot…” Her cheeks burned. “Sorry…”

“It’s fine.” He stepped closer. “Do you want help?”

“I… um…” Ahiru swallowed, and looked down at the ground. “Well… maybe I could just jump down or something? It doesn’t look _that_ far…”

“You’d get hurt that way, idiot.” Fakir shook his head. “Give me your hands and I’ll help you down.”

“B-but…” Ahiru’s eyes went wide. “What if – what if I mess up and fall on you? _You’d_ get hurt…”

“Better me than you. Now come on…” He took hold of her hands, and laid them on his shoulders. “I’ll just lift you down for now; we can practice this better another time.”

“Oh! Okay…” She held gingerly onto his shoulders as he took hold of her waist and lifted her out of the saddle; her grip was so light that as he lowered her to the ground her hands slid down over his chest, almost as if she was caressing him. It felt _very_ nice, but she found that she couldn’t look him in the eye after that, and focused on adjusting her skirts. “Th-thanks…”

“You – you’re welcome.” Fakir turned his back on her, and moved to lead his horse closer to the stream where it could drink. “Go – go ahead and pick some flowers if you want, I have to… I have to check him over while he rests…”

“Oh! Oh yeah!” Ahiru swallowed, and turned her attention to the meadow around them. As Fakir had promised, there were indeed many snowdrops blooming here, and her mortification over the intimacy of her dismount soon melted away into delight over the treasure trove of flowers. “Oooh… they’re so pretty…”

“Is that why you wanted to gather some?” She glanced back to see Fakir checking Asim’s hooves for snow buildup.

“No… well, yes… sort of…” Ahiru knelt down beside a cluster of them. “I mean, that’s part of the reason, I know it sounds silly, but we also use them for some brews, like to treat certain poisons…”

“I didn’t mean to imply there was anything silly about it.” She heard him shake some snow off one of the horseshoes.  “Sorry. I was just curious, is all.”

“Oh, okay… I understand now.” She carefully plucked a few before standing up and moving on to where some more grew. “I know some people think it’s frivolous and silly to be interested in stuff just cause it’s pretty, so I thought… I thought it’d be better to say I want them for medicinal stuff too, not that I don’t really want that, just… yeah.”

“I don’t think there’s anything frivolous about that.” Finished with the hooves, Fakir moved on to patting dry the small amount of sweat worked up by the ride. “Even if you did just want them to put in a vase, that’s fine. If it’s what you really want and it gives you happiness, then I don’t see a problem.”

“Well, yeah, I do… I thought it’d be nice to decorate the table with in the kitchen, and maybe some in my room, too…” Ahiru brought her little bouquet to her nose and inhaled deeply. “I’m surprised they’re blooming already, it’s a little early in the month…”

“I don’t know much about flowers, but keep in mind that we’re close to the fairy world here.” Fakir pulled something out of his bag and began to feed it to Asim. “Their magic can spill over into our world, and it has strange effects on the flora and fauna, causing things to bloom out of season sometimes or where they shouldn’t, and likewise some plants won’t take at all to certain places.”

“That’s true…” Ahiru picked a few more, and arranged them the way she liked before walking back over to stand by Fakir. Once he’d finished feeding Asim the snack, she held out a flower to him and beamed. “Here! For you! As – as thanks for bringing me here and all, and don’t say it’s nothing, cause it’s important to me that you thought of me and wanted to bring me along even though it was probably a hassle…”

“It… wasn’t a hassle. But… thanks.” His cheeks going pink, Fakir reached for the flower, but then stopped. “No, wait… you should hold onto it until we get back, so it doesn’t get damaged.”

“Oh yeah…” Ahiru replaced it amongst the others she’d picked. “A-and I’ll give you some more, too, if you want, so it’s like a little bouquet you can put in a vase… or you could just press this one in a book, it’s up to you…”

“Pressing it sounds good.” He tucked a stray lock of hair behind his ear. “You should use most of those the way you want, anyway.”

“What if I want to give them all to you as a present for being so nice?” Ahiru tried winking at him again. “Cause I wouldn’t have any if you didn’t bring me here…”

“That – that’d be ridiculous.” His cheeks went from slightly pink to bright red. “You said you wanted some in the kitchen and your room and to use in brews, right? Don’t – don’t waste them all on me.”

“It wouldn’t be a waste, silly.” Ahiru giggled. “And anyway, I’m just joking, you can have as many as you want, but I _am_ going to use the rest those other ways. Don’t worry.”

“Oh.” He seemed to relax. “Well… then… one will be enough. Thanks.”

“Of course!” She beamed up at him again. “And thank you, really, it’s been a lot of fun getting outside, a-and riding and… I’m really glad you thought of it and invited me, I know I keep saying that but I mean it…”

“I know you do.” He finally let himself smile at her, a small one but obviously genuine nonetheless, and her heart fluttered. “You’re welcome. I’m… glad it’s been good for you.”

“Definitely!” Ahiru walked past him and sat down at the water’s edge, setting her flowers beside her. “Wow… it’s so pretty here… and I didn’t even know it existed.” She sighed. “I wish I knew all this as well as you do…”

“You’ll learn.” Fakir sat down beside her. “Just give it time. It took me time to learn too, so don’t feel bad about yourself for not being an expert on a place you moved to not even half a year ago.”

“I know, I know I shouldn’t be. It’s just…” Ahiru let out another sigh. “I just get so frustrated sometimes because there’s other stuff I feel like I _should_ know better by now.”

“Like what?” He reached into his bag and pulled out a waterskin, which he uncapped and drank from.

“Like fairies and changelings and stuff.” She picked up a pebble and tossed it into the brook; it skipped a couple times before sinking beneath the surface. “That’s what I was reading about earlier, changeling legends… I know it’s not my fault that nobody taught me that well, but I feel so mad at myself anyway for not knowing and I started thinking earlier that sometimes it seems like I’ll never catch up to you or anyone else…”

“You will, though.” Fakir picked up a larger pebble and turned it over in his hand, examining the bright flecks in it. “All you have to do is keep reading at your own pace and asking questions. It’ll take you time because you do have to catch up, but you shouldn’t beat yourself up for that. Like you said, it really isn’t your fault that no one taught you these things in more detail. It’s the fault of your teachers, and the city culture you grew up in that disdains such information as obsolete.”

“Yeah… and that makes me mad too.” Ahiru made a pouty face at her reflection in the water. “They shouldn’t just dismiss it like that, even if it’s not vital to how they live there it’s still really interesting, you know? And it makes me sad too… for everybody else who’s not getting to learn as well as for me, and… sometimes I feel bad and guilty about being a city person, even though that wasn’t my choice either.” Her shoulders drooped.

Fakir took another drink of water. “Are you really, though?”

“Huh?” Ahiru looked up at him, tilting her head slightly. “What do you mean? I – I spent most of my life in one… how could I not be?”

“Well, maybe this is just me picking at semantics, but…” Fakir shrugged. “Usually, I hear people describing themselves as a city or country person because they prefer the one or the other, not because it’s where they happen to live. You seem to have settled in here well, so I’m not sure if you really _are_ a city person, technically… but then, you’d know best, so I could be wrong.”

“Hmmm…” Ahiru put her chin in her hand and pondered his question. “I… I never thought about it that way… when you talk about it like that, then… then I think I’m definitely not a city person after all, or least not a large city person cause Goldkrone is a city too, just a smaller one… but, but anyway I like it more here. I’m really happy I moved here and that I got to meet you and everyone else, and it’s just so pretty, and… and yeah.” She folded her hands in her lap. “I don’t see what that has to do with anything, though…”

“Well… I just…” Fakir shifted, and looked down at the water, where both their faces were reflected. “I guess that wasn’t the best way of getting to the point, but my point in the end is… you shouldn’t feel bad about where you come from. It doesn’t define you, it isn’t all you are. Your true self is much more than that, and you shouldn’t feel bad about coming from a particular place. It doesn’t make you a bad person and it certainly doesn’t mean you can’t find your real home elsewhere.”

“Oh… that makes sense…” Ahiru clasped her hands together more tightly. “I… th-thank you, I…”

“Ahiru?” Fakir turned to face her, looking alarmed. “What’s wrong? Did I say something wrong?”

“N-no, I just…” She sniffled and wiped at her damp eyes. “Sorry, I don’t want to worry you… I just… I’m so used to people making me feel bad about various things about myself that it’s still really new for me to have someone be nice to me like you are…” Why was she reacting like this? Edel said nice things to her all the time and that meant a lot to her too, but something about hearing it from Fakir was different, somehow. Not better or worse, just different.

“… You’ve known too many cruel people in your life.” Through her slightly blurred vision, she thought she saw anger flash across his face. “Here, hold on…” He set the waterskin down and reached into his bag again. He withdrew a handkerchief, and wiped gently at her wet cheeks with it. “Here.” He held it out to her. “Keep it.”

“I… thanks.” Ahiru smiled lopsidedly at him before taking the handkerchief; she wiped at her eyes and nose a little with it. “Sorry… I didn’t mean to make you worry.”

“Idiot. There’s no need to apologize for having emotions.” He picked up the waterskin again and held it towards her. “Anyway, are you thirsty?”

“A little bit, yeah.” Ahiru took it from him and gulped down some water. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He seemed to realize that he still held a pebble in his other hand, and tossed it into the brook. “You want to get going now? I think we’ve been out in the cold long enough and I’d like to get Asim back in the stable. It’s not good to have him outside for too long.”

“Oh yeah, that’s right… okay, let’s go back.” Ahiru picked up her bouquet of snowdrops and stood. “I’m ready to go when you are.”

“All right, I’ll just bring him back over here.” Fakir rose as well, and headed over to where Asim was ambling around, just walking in circles through the meadow. He gently and deftly caught hold of the reins, and led him back over to where Ahiru waited. “Ready?”

“Y-yeah.” She nodded, and tried to ignore her body’s familiar reactions to being helped into the saddle and then held close once he’d climbed on behind her.

“All right.” He guided Asim into another slow walk, and only after they’d been riding a while did he ease him into a slightly faster gait. It made the ride back take even longer than the ride there had, which Ahiru was secretly and selfishly grateful for as she was enjoying Fakir’s closeness and company so much that she didn’t want it to end too soon.

When they got back to the stable, she helped him dry Asim off and cool him down before heading home. The sun had come out a little more by now, so there was a small bit of warmth in the pale rays that poked through the thin cloud cover. Ahiru held tight to her snowdrops as they walked along, wishing that she dared reach out and hold Fakir’s hand; just before they reached the front door she nearly did, but lost her nerve. It was too late anyway, she consoled herself as Fakir unlocked the front door and they went inside. She laid her flowers down on the table beside the bag he’d brought as they stripped off their cloaks, scarves, and gloves and hung them up. “Um, do you want your flower now?” she asked when they’d finished. “O-or do you want it later?”

“I’ll take it now.” He reached out and took the snowdrop she offered him, their fingers brushing ever so lightly. “Thank you. What are you going to do now?”

“Well, I… um…” Ahiru pursed her lips. “I – I think I’ll put some of these downstairs, and then divide up the rest between little vases in my room and the kitchen… why? What are you going to do?”

“I’m not sure.” Fakir shrugged. “I might go read in the library until dinner. If – if you want to read too after you’re done with that it wouldn’t bother me.” He glanced away, gazing down the hall. “Just in case you wanted to go back to your books.”

“I – I think I might!” Ahiru smiled. “I’ll come and join you then, after I’m done with the flowers, a-and don’t worry, you won’t be a bother to me either.”

“All right.” He nodded. “I’ll see you, then, if you decide to do that.”

He headed off down the hall to the library, while Ahiru went to the storeroom. She laid out some of the snowdrops for processing later, and then returned to the main part of the house. In the kitchen she filled two small vases made of frosted glass with water, and divided up the rest of the flowers between them. One she set in the center of the kitchen table, while the other she carried to her room along with the oil can so she could quiet her door’s hinges. As she hemmed and hawed over its placement she thought also of Fakir’s offer, and recalled that she’d left her book of changeling legends on the little table by the armchair she’d sat in that morning. She didn’t know how well she’d be able to concentrate if he was in view of her, but reading quietly with him sounded appealing all the same, so when she’d finally picked a spot to put the vase she all but skipped off towards the library.

By the time she got there Fakir had already built the fire back up and settled himself into an armchair near the one where she’d sat earlier that day. Ahiru smiled at him, and he smiled back before returning his attention to the book open on his lap. She let her gaze linger on him for a second and then got into the same chair she’d occupied that morning; she put the blanket over herself and flipped through her book to get to where she remembered leaving off.

It was indeed difficult to concentrate with Fakir so close by, and she made slow progress due to her desire to steal glances at him from time to time. Every once in a while she thought she sensed him doing the same thing, but when she looked up – pretending to be doing something else, like rubbing her eyes or yawning or looking at the fire – he had his attention fixed on his own book. She shrugged and chalked it up to her imagination, and tried to focus on the fairy stories as best she could.

They read together until the early evening; Fakir had just gotten up to light some additional lamps when they heard the sound of the front door opening, along with footsteps and voices. Their eyes met, and Ahiru set her book down and pushed her blanket off. “Sounds like Edel’s home, and she brought somebody with her.”

“Probably Charon.” Fakir followed her out of the library. “He’s supposed to come over and share dinner with us and do the fortune telling, remember?”

“Oh yeah.” Ahiru tugged some of her skirt down. “I haven’t gotten to do it in years, I wonder what I’ll get…”

Fakir frowned. “You didn’t do it with your friends?”

“Not unless they came over, or I went over there.” Ahiru shook her head. “My guardian didn’t hold with such things, he said it was superstitious nonsense and he wouldn’t have it done in his house lest people think we were backwards country folk or something.” She sighed heavily. “He was… he could be really awful sometimes… most of the time, actually…”

“Then I’m glad you’re away from him.” Fakir pushed open the kitchen door and held it for her. Inside Edel was setting up for dinner while Charon sat at the table, the items he’d need for later stacked on one end where no one would be eating. “Hey.”

“Oh, hey, Fakir.” Charon looked over and smiled warmly. “And Ahiru, good to see you too. Ready to ring in the new year with some molybdomancy?”

“Some… what?” Ahiru blinked.

“It’s the technical term for the type of fortune telling we’re doing tonight,” Edel supplied. “Charon thinks he sounds all fancy when he uses it. Even though _I_ taught him the word.”

“Hush, now, you’re going to make me sound like a fool.” Charon chuckled. “And in front of these kids no less.”

“Do you really need her help?” Fakir asked as he pulled out a chair for Ahiru to sit in.

“Ahhh, even you’re against me? What a cruel world, to be so set against a poor old man like me.” Charon heaved a dramatic sigh. “Woe is me.”

Ahiru giggled. “Don’t be mean to him, you two!”

“He’s used to it.” Fakir’s mouth curved up into a small, amused smile. “Don’t worry yourself over him.”

“Ah, but I like this young lady.” Charon laughed and nodded approvingly at Ahiru. “You’re a good one, stuck here amongst these scoundrels.” His gaze fell on Fakir, who had just sat down beside Ahiru (as Charon had taken his usual spot across from her). “You do treat her right these days, I hope?”

“I –” Fakir flushed. “Of course I do, I’m not – I don’t – I wouldn’t ever – why are you still asking me that, you know we’re friends now…”

“Well, friends don’t always treat each other as kindly as they ought, but it’s good to hear that you’ve improved.” Charon accepted the tea Edel set before him, and sipped it. “Forgive me my intrusions and nagging, I just… well, it’s been a while since I saw you with a friend, and I know Ahiru’s still fairly new here, so I worry a bit about both of you. If you’re friends and enjoying each other’s company, then I’m content.”

“We are,” Ahiru put in, feeling heat in her face. “Don’t – don’t worry, Fakir is really good to me, I think I’ve told you that before… he’s really kind and supportive a-and you should believe in him.”

“I do.” Fatherly pride shone in Charon’s face as he gazed at Fakir. “I hope that’s something he never doubts.”

“I… no.” Fakir broke eye contact to stare down at the table. “I don’t doubt that… I… thanks…”

“Of course, of course.” Charon nodded and opened his mouth to say something further on the matter, but found his attention immediately redirected to the food Edel had started bringing over for them. “Ah, bless you Edel, this’ll hit the spot. It’s been a long afternoon.”

“Working in the forge on what’s meant to be a day off?” Edel shook her head and laughed. “Why am I not surprised?”

“Now, now, I did have to get prepared for tonight.” Charon piled some potato salad onto his plate. “And then, well, surely you must know how it is when you’ve got a personal project or two going on… hard to resist taking a bit of a crack at it for a while, and then before you know it the morning or afternoon is gone.”

“I wouldn’t know anything about that.” Edel’s eyes twinkled as she sat down and began to serve herself food as well. “What about you two? How did you while away the afternoon?”

“We went for a ride.” Fakir arranged some slices of ham and cheese on a roll. “I needed to take Asim out for some exercise, and the two of us wanted to get out besides, so…” He shrugged.

“Yeah, and Fakir’s helping me learn how to ride!” Ahiru’s eyes sparkled. “It’s hard, especially getting up on there or getting down, cause I’m so little, but it’s also really fun and he’s really nice and patient with me and a good teacher, so I have a good time.”

“Fakir? Patient?” Charon exaggeratedly paused his potato-laden fork’s journey to his mouth, an expression of faux shock on his face. “That’s a new one.” He chuckled. “You must be a good influence on him.”

“I…” Ahiru ducked her head, focusing her attention on making herself a small sandwich. “I don’t know… I… um…”

“I’m just glad to hear you’re enjoying yourself,” Edel said, and relief swept through Ahiru at the slight redirection of the topic at hand. “And learning another new thing. That has been a passion for you since you got here, hasn’t it?”

“Yes!” Ahiru nodded. She took a bite of her sandwich and immediately followed it up with some potato salad and a gulp of tea; she didn’t speak again until she’d swallowed it all down. “I was thinking about that this morning, how much I love learning all these new things and how much I’m going to keep learning this coming year… I’m looking forward to all of it.”

Edel smiled. “As always, your dedication is admirable.”

Ahiru blushed at that, and stammered out an attempt at deflecting the compliment before busying herself with finishing her dinner. The conversation at the table turned to other matters after that, and became rather sporadic until everyone had polished off their food. It then came time to clean up, a task everyone pitched in for, and when that too had been accomplished Charon finally pulled the things he’d brought over to the center of the table.

“Did I overhear that you’ve not got much experience with this tradition, Ahiru?” Charon asked as he arranged a large candle in its designated place.

“Y-yeah…” Ahiru lowered her head, her hands twisting in her lap. “I – I only got to do it once or twice, a long time ago…”

“Nothing to be ashamed of.” Striking a match, Charon lit the candle. Close beside it Edel had already set down a large bowl of fresh, cold water, and laid a towel down in front of each of them. “If anything, it’ll add a bit of excitement and novelty to it for you that it lacks for the rest of us. Just enjoy yourself.”

“Okay.” Ahiru leaned a little over the table. “What is it we do again?”

“Simple.” Charon handed her a small spoon with a piece of metal in it. “Heat this tin over the candle’s flame, and when it’s melted pour it into the water. The shape it takes will be some sort of portent for next year.” He reached for a small book, and held it up. “This is a guide to the things you might see, I’ll look ‘em up for us as we go… haven’t got them all memorized, I’m afraid.” He scratched the back of his head with his free hand.

“A-all right…” Ahiru stood up so that she could better reach the candle, and held the spoon over the flame. Soon enough the tin had gone molten, so she quickly – but carefully – poured it into the water Edel had provided. Hissing and steam accompanied it, and then the misshapen lump of tin became visible at the bottom of the bowl. She hesitated for a moment, and then reached her hand into the water. The tin was still warm, but not hot enough to burn her skin, and she lifted it out and laid it on the towel that had been set in front of her. “Hmmm… it… it kind of looks like some kind of flower…”

Edel leaned over to peer at it. “A chrysanthemum, I think.”

“A chrysanthemum, eh?” Charon flipped through the well-worn little book. “Ah, here we are… says that that means that someone needs your help.”

“Oh.” Ahiru’s shoulders drooped a little. “Well, that one’s obvious… it’s everyone I’m helping as a witch…”

“Could be.” Charon shrugged. “What’s the matter? Hoping for something more exciting, like a foretelling of love?” He laughed.

“Yeah… I – I mean no! I mean…” Ahiru waved her hands in front of herself, her eyes widening. “I mean… I mean… um… I just… I thought it’d be less… less simple, I guess? I was kind of hoping for something more mysterious and… hmmm…” Her lower lip came out in a slight pout. “I guess… I kind of thought fortune telling was more… vague?”

“It can be, yes,” Edel said. “In fact, it usually is. That’s something you’ll learn when I begin teaching you divination methods this year. Some are murkier than others, as you’ll find out, and harder to interpret. But yes, messages tend to be vague, and up to the interpretation of those receiving them.”

“Yeah, I thought so.” Ahiru sighed. “So how come this one is so obvious, then?”

“It is not. You are only taking the most obvious possible meaning.” Edel tapped her finger against the table. “As I said, the messages are up to the interpretation of those receiving them, and thus are dependent on your thoughts of what it means to you. But your interpretation may not be correct – there is always the possibility that you are missing or unaware of its true meaning, only to discover it later.”

“Later?” Ahiru gulped. “As in… _too_ late?”

“Not necessarily.” Edel shook her head. “It may be that after an event happens, you realize that a reading you had some months prior had in fact been referring to that, and not to what you initially assumed. That is another thing that will become clear to you when you begin learning about divination – people who know little about it tend to assume that it’s an art of doom and gloom, but there’s so much more to it than predicting misfortune. It is meant only as suggestion, gentle guidance, a reminder to keep your eyes and ears open to the world around you so that you may capitalize on possibilities and avoid ill luck.”

“Oh, that makes more sense… and really, it’s not a bad reading, I like helping people….” Ahiru gazed down at the little chrysanthemum for a few seconds, and then put another lump of tin in the spoon and held it out to Fakir. “A-anyway, do you want to go next?”

“I suppose I might as well.” Fakir took the proffered spoon, and Ahiru noticed that it seemed to shake in his grasp a little before he steadied his hand and held it over the flame. When it melted he poured it into the water, and he hesitated only a little before pulling it out and setting it onto the towel. “I…” He inspected it with a wary expression on his face. “I’m not sure what that’s supposed to be.”

Ahiru took a look at it, and immediately shuddered. “It – it kind of looks like a spider to me…”

“Hmmm, yes.” Edel nodded. “It does resemble one, you’re right.”

“A spider, eh?” Charon studied it. “Yeah, that seems about right… let’s see what that means…” He picked up the book again and flipped through it. “A spider… ah. That means your luck hangs on a silken thread.” He frowned. “I’m not sure if that’s good or bad, honestly… a thread would seem to suggest weakness, thinness, but silk is supposed to be a very strong fabric if I remember correctly…”

“It is.” Edel stared down at the tin spider. “I suppose… that this is one of the more ambiguous symbols. It could go either way.”

“And it’s no guarantee of anything, anyway.” Ahiru couldn’t read Fakir’s expression at all as he spoke. “I’m not going to worry over it.”

“That’s a good attitude.” Charon nodded at him. “And really, I take this stuff with a grain of salt anyway. It’s just New Year’s fun.”

“Exactly.” Fakir picked up the spoon and held it out to Charon. “Do you want to go next, then?”

“Nah, I’ll wait. Let our hostess go next.” He indicated Edel.

“I’ll take my turn, then.” Fakir handed Edel the spoon, and she filled it with a piece of tin out of the box Charon had brought. They waited for it to melt as she held it over the candle flame, and at that point she tipped it into the water. Once it had cooled enough for her to lift out she did so, and laid it on her own towel. Everyone else at the table leaned in to take a peek at it. “Ah… hmm. Perhaps one of you will have a different interpretation of this shape, but to me it seems to be a pair of glasses.”

“No, that’s what it looks like to me too.” Fakir uncrossed his legs, unaware that Ahiru was surreptitiously watching him do it.

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru tore her gaze away from Fakir’s lower body and nodded at Edel. “It looks like glasses to me too.”

“And my agreement makes it unanimous, so…” Charon turned some pages. “Ah. You will live to be old.” He chuckled. “Always a good one to get.”

Edel smiled. “Indeed.”

“… Yeah.” Something flickered in Fakir’s eyes. “I agree.”

“Me too, I’m glad you got that one.” Ahiru settled herself back in her chair.

“As am I.” Edel picked the spoon up, put a piece of tin in it, and held it out to Charon. “I suppose you end up going last.”

“Fine with me. Just…” Charon accepted the spoon from her and held out the book. “If you don’t mind doing this bit for me?”

“Not at all.” Edel took it, and Charon stood so he could heat his tin.

“Appreciate it.” He fell silent after that as he waited for it to melt; he coughed slightly as the steam went into his face once he’d poured the tin into the water. His eyebrows went up when he took it out and laid it on his towel. “A triangle, eh? That’s pretty straightforward.” He looked over at Edel. “Refresh my memory – what’s the meaning of that one?”

Edel flipped through, and smiled as she saw it. “It means that your finances will improve.”

“Ha!” He sat back down. “Another one that’s always good to get. I can definitely live with _that_.” He winked at them all. “Anyway, shall we retire? I’ve a mind to have some of those pastries you brought back from Ebine’s while we wait for midnight to strike.”

“Not all of them,” Edel reminded him. “Some have to be saved to eat after midnight.”

“I know, I know.” He chuckled. “But there’s no harm in a little dessert now, is there?”

“Heh.” Edel smiled. “I suppose not.”

They whiled away the rest of the evening by the fire in the sitting room, eating pastries and talking about various things, reflecting and reminiscing about the past year and sharing their hopes for the coming one. When midnight arrived, candles were lit and the last of the food was consumed in celebration before bidding each other goodnight and heading off to their rooms for much-needed sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Asim: Means "protector" in Arabic.


	17. Chapter 17

Life settled down into a new normal after the New Year. Ahiru and Fakir began attending lessons with Mr. Katz a couple days later, and needed little adjusting to the new experience. For her part Ahiru wasn’t used to being tutored alongside anyone else, but found Fakir’s presence and contributions so enjoyable that she eased into it almost immediately. It had been a few years since Fakir had had the chance to be instructed in anything, and he confided in her that it was going to feel new again and a bit awkward; it showed in the way he seemed almost reluctant to speak up in class, or maybe he’d always been that way? She didn’t know and didn’t feel it was right to ask, because if it was a natural personality trait the question would probably make him feel self-conscious in some way. But by the end of the third lesson he seemed more comfortable and willing to join the discussions, which Ahiru enjoyed as she had considerable amounts of fun talking to him, in class and outside it alike.

Ahiru’s witchcraft lessons took on a new schedule as well. The brewing of various potions and medicines was something that would take a couple years, at least, to master, due to the wealth of things to make and techniques to be used. However, there were also many other things she needed to learn to do in her craft, so Edel took to instructing her in them alongside it. As February began, she started devoting one lesson day per week to teaching her divination methods, just like she’d promised she soon would. They began with astrology: Ahiru would by day study about the constellations and astrological signs, and in the evening they would observe the stars. She would not learn how to write up horoscopes just yet, but instead focused on how the position of the stars and phase of the moon affected everyday actions like gardening, brewing, and spellcasting. She found it all very interesting, if complex and a bit confusing (though this slowly eased the more she learned).

When she awoke on February 14 the faint scent of chocolate teased her senses. Surprise rose up inside her first, followed by hunger and delight. Was Edel making something special for them all today? Lover’s Day was meant to be just that, a day devoted to romance, but maybe since this was a household of single people – as far as she knew, at least – she’d decided to do a treat for everyone since they likely wouldn’t be getting anything otherwise. Her stomach growling and mind full of happy thoughts, she sprang out of bed and hurried through her morning routine.

She nearly collided with Fakir as she left her room; or rather, he nearly collided with her, as he’d just come out of his own room just seconds before. “Oops! I – I’m sorry!” Ahiru backed away, her face warming with mortification. “I – I didn’t mean to do that…”

“Idiot. It’s not your fault.” Fakir shook his head. “We just had similar timing, is all. Don’t go feeling guilty over a coincidence you can’t help. If anything, it’d be _my_ fault if we had bumped into each other.”

“Th-that’s true.” Ahiru giggled. “It’s usually me being clumsy, but this time it would’ve been you.”

“Heh.” He gave her a lopsided little smile. “Don’t get too used to it.”

Ahiru stuck her tongue out at him, and he laughed. “So, um, anyway… what do you think the chocolate smell is from? Maybe Edel’s making hot cocoa for breakfast, or baking something for later?”

“For later?” His eyebrows drew together. “Why would – oh. Yeah.” His expression changed to a slight frown. “I almost forgot what day it was.”

“I didn’t.” Ahiru sighed. “We’ve been getting lots of orders for stuff having to do with it, and Edel even had to do some fortune telling because the witches in town that focus exclusively on divination are so swamped… it’s been kind of busy for the past few days or so.” Her frown cleared. “But now it’ll be over, and maybe we’ll get a chocolate treat after all!”

“That’s a good way of looking at it.” He smiled, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Let’s go see what it is.”

He followed her to the kitchen, where the chocolate scent hit them full blast as soon as Ahiru opened the door. A breakfast spread sat waiting on the table, and Edel had just pulled something out of the oven. She set it aside to cool, and turned to look at them. “Ah, good morning you two.”

“Morning!” Ahiru took a deep sniff of the fragrant air. “What are you making? Is – is that for all of us?”

“The one I’m about to put in will be.” Edel opened the oven back up and slid another pan inside. “The other one is for Ebine. Once both cakes are completely finished, I’m going to bring it over to her. She…” She paused. “She doesn’t like to be alone on this day either. I spent it with her last year, and we… agreed to do the same today. So I’ll be having lunch over there and be back sometime in the late afternoon. There should be enough leftover stew and bread for the both of you, don’t worry.”

“That’s fine.” Fakir walked over to the stove, where a kettle sat gently simmering beside a pot of hot cereal. “This… what blend of tea of this?”

“Oh, that’s…” Edel laughed. “I had enough left of the special one I always make and sell for this holiday to brew some for us, and the rest I’ll take to Ebine’s. It has rose petals, dried strawberries, and chocolate – is that all right with you, or would you prefer plain tea?”

“No, this sounds good.” Fakir poured himself some tea and spooned cereal into a bowl before going to the table, where various pastries and breads had been laid out with jams and honey.

“Ooh, yeah, I kind of wanted to try it when we were making it,” Ahiru admitted as she poured a cup for herself. “It smelled so good and it still does.” She got some cereal too, and then glanced at the cake cooling; it had been baked in a heart-shaped pan, apropos to the day, and nearby a small jar of powdered sugar waited for sprinkling. “That cake looks really cute.”

“Ah, thanks.” Edel turned away and glanced at her recipe notes. “I was – given these pans as a gift some years ago, and what better day to use them for baking?”

“Yeah, I like them.” Ahiru sat down across from Fakir, and started piling things onto her plate. “Oh… this all looks so yummy…”

“I hope it is.” Edel glanced over at her now. “I thought it might be nice to have a special breakfast for once. Just for fun.”

“Oh, definitely!” Ahiru sweetened and seasoned her cereal, and then dug in. A thought occurred to her as she chewed, however, and she swallowed almost too hastily so that she could get it out of her head. “Oh, but – what do you want me to do while you’re away? Don’t we have things we need to do?”

Edel shook her head. “You don’t really _need_ to do anything while I’m with Ebine, but if you’d like to, there are some dried herbs and flowers that need storing and labeling, and if you feel like something more mundane the library and sitting room need a bit of dusting. But if you’d rather spend the day relaxing, go ahead and do that instead – it’s been a busy week and you deserve some rest.”

“Oh no, I don’t mind cleaning at all!” Ahiru tore off a bit of a pastry laden with sweet cream cheese. “I’ve been meaning to dust in my room, actually, so I’ll do those rooms too, and anywhere else that needs it… just some cleaning in general, and I’ll try to do the flowers and herbs too…”

“I’ll help.” Fakir set down his tea cup. “With the dusting and cleaning, at least. Since I’m living here now I should pitch in as much as I can, and I have the day off so I might as well.”

“If you both insist, then I’d appreciate it.” Edel shrugged. “Don’t work yourselves into exhaustion or think you have to get everything, however – it wasn’t that long ago that I did a full cleaning, and I don’t want to burden either of you with too much anyway.”

“I don’t mind it.” Ahiru swallowed down some pastry. “I feel the same way as Fakir – I should help because I live here.”

“You’re both very kind.” Edel smiled. “Thank you.”

Edel stuck around only long enough to finish the second cake and sprinkle both with powdered sugar; once she’d done that, her cleanup having been accomplished while they baked and cooled, she packed what she needed into a basket and bid them farewell, promising again to be back later in the day. Ahiru and Fakir washed up after they were done eating and then set to their household chores. They agreed that Fakir would take the library and Ahiru the sitting room, as well as doing their own bedrooms. Ahiru dusted and swept her bedroom first and straightened up her belongings, and put some cleansing powder on her rug before heading to the sitting room.

Most of the morning had passed by the time she finished everything in there – she’d chosen to tackle her bedroom first because she’d felt it would take less time, and she’d been right. Despite it not being that large a room overall, there was still plenty to do that added up to a larger list of chores than her bedroom had: more wood to polish, more surfaces and objects to dust, and more upholstery to clean, as well as a larger floor to sweep. The majority of the furniture was quite aged and getting shabby round the edges, but she rather liked that; it had a distinctly lived-in feel that new things lacked. Pike’s family, and those they associated with, tended to replace furniture as soon as it became even slightly unfashionable or they grew bored of it, which seemed rather wasteful in Ahiru’s private opinion (she’d expressed it once, in a way, to Pike, and received a stern lecture that had done nothing to convince her otherwise, and had kept silent on the matter ever since). But then, the whole house had a rather cozy, homey feel that agreed with her general sensibilities and had helped her adjustment period considerably.

So absorbed was she in work and such thoughts that the ringing of the doorbell made her jump and quack in surprise. It happened just as she was getting the last bits of dust off a lamp shade, and the duster flew out of her hands. Ahiru frowned at the dust it scattered onto the floor she’d _just_ swept, and then hurried out and towards the front door.

She didn’t see Fakir on her way there; presumably he hadn’t heard the bell ringing. Ahiru went as quickly as she could, and pulled the door open to see Hermia standing there. “Hello!” she said cheerfully. “I have some mail for you all today! Well, for you and Edel, anyway.”

“Hi, Hermia.” Ahiru smiled. “It’s nice to see you – how are you?”

“Oh, you know…” Hermia waved her hand. “Busy as ever, though at least most people’s love letters and whatnot already arrived. But there’s still a lot to do today!”

“I bet,” Ahiru said, her tone one of sympathy. “We had a lot to do this week too, so many people wanted stuff for today.”

“I can imagine.” Hermia sighed. “As you might guess, it’s one of the busiest times of the year for us couriers, excepting Yule, of course. But I don’t mind.” Her sigh this time was distinctly dreamy, and her eyes sparkled. “If by my hard and humble work I can help connect the hearts of those in love, then it’s all worth the sore feet and aching back! I believe in this job most of all at times like this.”

“Awww.” Ahiru smiled. “I – I’m glad it’s worth it for you, and that you enjoy what you do.”

“Oh, I do!” Hermia’s eyes widened and lit up. “I mean, yes, sometimes I do complain about things, like when my feet get blisters or the bag is so heavy it gives me back pain, but you know, Miss Edel makes the best products for those sorts of things anyway so I’m never really suffering for long… but anyway, to get back to the point, even though it does have its downs the ups make it so worth it that I never truly hate what I do. There’s so much reward, and you get to really help people, you know?”

“Yeah, I can see that.” Ahiru nodded. “Without you, nobody would be able to get their mail to where it’s supposed to go – what you do is really, really important and I think people take it for granted.”

“Some do, I’m sure.” Hermia shrugged. “But I do also hear so many words of thanks, and that makes up for the rare rude person. That’s not why I took the job, though – not to hear people’s praise, anyway. Just being able to help everyone is its own reward.”

“Yeah, I get that.” Ahiru brushed a bit of dust off her dress. “That’s why I wanted to become a witch, so I could help people.”

“And a marvelous job I bet you do!” Hermia grinned, and Ahiru blushed. “Oh, it’s so nice, though, to talk to someone who understands… both the importance of helping people and of the mail itself. Because letters… letters are so very important, more than people sometimes realize. When you send one out into the world, it’s like sending a piece of _you_. If you can’t talk with someone in person, then all you have are your words on a piece of paper, and you must put all your heart and effort into it to make sure they understand your words and that you come through as your honest true self and your meanings are plain to someone who cannot see your face and voice as you speak. It’s so vital that a courier sees to it that your words reach your recipient and make a difference, whether you’ve written to parent, child, friend, or lover.”

“I – I never really thought about it that way before, but you’re right.” Ahiru frowned. “Oh, it’d be so sad if someone’s really important letter went astray…”

“Yes, it would be! And that’s why I work so hard, to make sure I deliver everything on time and to the right person, and that nothing gets misplaced or lost.” Hermia dug into her bag and produced three letters, which she held out to Ahiru. “Especially at this time of year… every sort of letter is important, of course, but I’ve always been particularly horrified by the idea of true love being stopped before it can truly begin, all due to a lost love letter.”

Ahiru took the proffered letters – one for Edel, and two for her, from Pike and Lilie. “Oh, I know, that’d be really sad…”

“A tragedy.” Hermia nodded. “Which is not to say that I don’t deliver love letters any other time of year, I do, and I place equal importance on other types of letters too, of course. But so many people put so much value on _this_ particular holiday, you know? So there’s a greater volume of love letters to be sent and received, expressing feelings either for the first time or renewing them, carrying comfort to those who are separated, all sorts of things, and I just couldn’t let any of them not reach their intended. It would be so wrong, so sad.” She sighed. “And honestly, if I may confess… the delivery of love letters was one of the primary reasons I got into this job in the first place.”

“Really?” Ahiru tilted her head. “How come? You wanted to help people’s romances along?”

“Yes, but… I suppose for something of a selfish reason.” Hermia blushed and bowed her head. “I’ve never been terribly brave about expressing my own feelings of love, you see… my first crush on someone, years ago, it went nowhere because I never said anything, and they wound up marrying someone else without really realizing I existed. I made myself so miserable and I never even did anything to help myself. And afterwards I looked at my unfinished love letters, and I felt such _shame_ , and I thought… if I can’t or won’t help myself, then I should try to help others. So I became a courier to do just that… to help others express feelings in words that I could not, and spread love of all kinds throughout the world.”

“Awww, no, I don’t think that’s selfish.” Ahiru shook her head. “I – I think that’s really kind of you, and brave, and unselfish, cause you could’ve just continued to mope in your room and become bitter and unhappy, but here you are trying to help other people do what you didn’t, and spread happiness and love… I think that’s really wonderful, and so are you.” She smiled.

“Oh no, you’re too sweet.” Hermia clasped her hands to her cheeks, blushing even more furiously now. “Tell me, is there someone your heart desires? I could discreetly deliver a letter, if you wanted, or tell you if they’re in love… I can often tell or sense such things.”

“Wh-what? Me?” Ahiru shook her head so vigorously that her braid flew from side to side. “N-no, there’s nobody for me, I mean… nobody I… but – but thank you anyway, Hermia, that’s – that’s really nice of you!”

“Awww, all right.” Ahiru thought Hermia gave her a look that was both knowing and sympathetic, but it passed too quickly to be sure. “I really should be on my way, anyway… I still have quite a few things to deliver.” She straightened up and adjusted her bag. “It was lovely talking to you, though, Ahiru – see you around, and have a good day!”

“Th-thank you! You too!” Ahiru recovered enough to smile and wave to Hermia as she headed back up the path; she watched her disappear and then shut the door, the heat of embarrassment still burning within her. Tell someone else, _anyone_ else, about her feelings for Fakir? The very idea sent horror racing down her spine with an icy chill.

Besides, she acknowledged as she returned to the sitting room with her two letters in hand – Edel’s having been left in plain sight on the table by the front door – there was also the simple fact that she didn’t quite know what her feelings for him actually were at this point. That was something far less simple to work out, and in fact seemed rather murky. Was he just a friend she happened to be physically attracted to? Did she have a crush on him? Was she falling for him? It was complicated and scary and she honestly wasn’t in a hurry to figure it all out precisely because of her fear of what answer awaited her at the other end of the serious contemplation required.

Pushing it out of her mind for now, Ahiru finished up the cleaning that Hermia’s visit had interrupted and then sat down on one of the sofas to read her letters. She chose Lilie’s first, tearing the envelope open with the letter opener Edel kept on one of the little tables in there, and unfolded the missive contained within.

_HELLO MY DARLING AHIRU_

_Does this letter reach you well, on a fine day? For as I pen it, my day is second in finery only to that which still lies ahead within the year. It has happened, it has finally happened! And if you must ask what has finally happened, then shame upon you, for you have absorbed nothing in my previous letters, and are tragically unprepared for what I am about to tell you._

_The answer, of course, is… that my suitor that you have heard so much about these past months has finally proposed! Rejoice! For it is in this grandest of years that I shall finally cease to be the woefully single Lady Lilie of House Teufel, and shall instead become Lady Lilie, devoted wife of Mr. Femio Holst. Oh! The joy it brings me is almost too much for this world, I feel ready to DIE of it! Would that not be a beautiful tragedy, to die before one’s wedding day of the sheer thrill of being about to be married? Ah, if only someone would write a delightful novel about that! I would do it myself, but I fear that becoming a married woman might rob me of all my leisure time. Perhaps you know someone to whom you could pitch the idea? Be sure I get the credit, however!_

_In any case, the proposal was as beauteous as you might expect, so full of the pomp and grandeur I have come to expect from my fiancé. (Oh, how wonderful it feels to finally write that word!) His family owns several distinguished farms, most of them up north, and I am told that they raise the finest and most prized cows and bulls in all the land, and they make ever so much money off them, so I am assured of a comfortable lifestyle ever after. It was upon one such prize bull that he rode in on that day as I awaited him in his family’s lavish gardens, and his servant had paid musicians to hide amongst the shrubs to serenade us and accompany his entrance, as well as personally scattering the most fragrant and perfect rose petals all over the both of us. It was truly to die for, Ahiru, I wish you could have seen it! My darling Femio rode in on the bull, while the stirring music played and the scent of roses filled the air, and he leapt down with the utmost grace to kneel before me, kissing my hand and presenting to me a single, thornless rose that his servant handed him. And what do you think he said?_

_I will tell you! He professed to me his greatest and most sinful love, and begged me to accept him as husband, to forgive his sins and share them with him, to enter into his most glorious family and become a true princess forevermore. Oh, he is not a prince, alas, but he possesses the qualities of a true prince, and in a way is more royal than the actual royal family, and he told me of how worthy of becoming a part of such a lineage and contributing to its carrying-on I am. And as you must already realize, I accepted without delay! He did apologize for his sinfulness in not waiting until Lover’s Day – the date upon which I suspect this will reach you, how fitting! – but I told him there was always a way to absolve himself, and that I am more than happy to take on the tragic fate and terrible burden of helping him to atone, forevermore and a day. Oh, Ahiru, we are so well-suited for each other that sometimes it almost seems too good to be true! I can barely stand it! What an exciting life awaits me once we are wed!_

_And yes – as to that! I know, sweet Ahiru, that you must be dying to know when it is, and wondering why you have not received an invitation. Have I forsaken you? No! Never doubt my devotion for a moment! It may be that communications will slow when I have entered into matrimony, especially if we are given one of his family’s northern estates to reside upon after that momentous day, but I shall never truly let go of you. The only reason an invitation is not included in this missive is that they do not exist at this time, for a date has not yet been set in stone. When I have one ready an invitation will be sent out, and indeed, it looks likely that while you are reading this one will already be in the mail on its way to you. So be patient! I fully expect you to be there to help celebrate my happiness, and will accept nothing less. When the invitation arrives, write back with haste to tell me that you can attend!_

_Tragically yours, Lilie_

Ahiru blinked down at the letter. She couldn’t say, in all truthfulness, that she’d hadn’t been expecting such news after all the previous ones from Lilie. That said, however… it seemed as though she’d underestimated the flair for the dramatic that this Femio possessed. Lilie had spoken of this aspect of his personality before, of course, but all the same she felt rather dazed just at _reading_ about the proposal, and could only imagine how she’d have felt if she’d actually been there. She had to admit that they seemed well-suited for each other, however, just as Lilie had said, and was privately glad that circumstances hadn’t somehow led her late guardian to try and marry _her_ off to him. The very thought made her giggle, and she knew that if she’d been introduced to him as one of the long line of potential suitors Herr Drosselmeyer had brought before her he’d _definitely_ have stood out among the rest.

Ahiru allowed herself a few moment’s laughter – and a little shuddering at a probable close call that would’ve had dire consequences if things hadn’t worked out the way they had – before opening Pike’s letter. This one was shorter than Lilie’s, unsurprisingly; Pike had never been given to overwrought speech and tended to get right to the point.

_Dear Ahiru,_

_How have you been lately? I hope the countryside is still treating you well, and you haven’t caught cold out there – I hear the houses aren’t as well built as the ones here? And I hope you’re taking good care of yourself to compensate! I thought the other day that I’d caught some dreadful stomach ailment, but it turned out to be a false alarm, for which I’m immensely grateful. Are you studying hard? Tell me about your work as a witch! I really enjoyed the things you sent for Yule and I’m curious about what you’re learning to make these days. Witchcraft really is a noble art, no matter what kind of reputation some silly stories try to give it._

_I’m sure you’ve already gotten Lilie’s letter by now, she wrote it just yesterday. If you haven’t, well, I won’t spoil the news then. But I will say that I’m very happy for her, and I’m hoping both you and I can soon find such happiness ourselves. How are you doing on that front, come to that? Have any handsome men in Goldkrone caught your eye? I know you weren’t all that interested in anyone Herr Drosselmeyer had you meet (even though I personally saw nothing wrong with them), but maybe there’s a selection out there more to your taste, whatever that is? In any case, good luck, take care, and I hope to hear from you soon! Write back and tell me everything!_

_Yours, Pike_

Ahiru set the letter down, her stomach churning. What was she supposed to write back in reply to _that?_ She could lie via letter reasonably well and fully intended to, but even aside from feeling twinges of guilt over her dishonesty, what if she got questioned about the matter in person at Lilie’s wedding? It would be much harder – if not impossible – to conceal things in person, especially from Pike. Bad enough that Hermia seemed to have suspected deceit, since Hermia didn’t know her as well; Pike had known her for years and thus was better equipped to see through her poor attempts at deception. The idea of talking about her situation with Fakir with Pike, particularly if Lilie was there, sent fresh shivers of horror down her spine. After all, despite Lilie’s belief that she would be so preoccupied with married life after the wedding that her communications with her would lessen in frequency there existed the distinct possibility that she would nevertheless find the time to pen some sort of frothy, overwrought love letter addressed to Fakir and supposedly written by Ahiru, as her way of “helping” the situation. No. There was no way either of them could learn about the complicated tangle of emotions that was her relationship with Fakir.

A chime from the clock on the mantel interrupted these disquieting thoughts, and reminded her that it was time for lunch. Ahiru stayed seated for a minute or two more to compose herself while she folded the letters up and put them back in their envelopes, and then opted to head back to her room first before going to the kitchen. She needed time to get herself together before she saw Fakir, after all – it wouldn’t do to come face to face with him while still thinking about her confusion over her feelings and the terror that was the idea of Lilie and Pike trying to “help” matters. She walked the short distance from her room to the kitchen as slowly as possible, trying to assure herself that she’d practice and get better at hiding things by the time she saw her friends again, and that maybe everything here would be resolved anyway by then, and took a deep breath to steady herself before pushing the door open.

Inside all was as she’d more or less expected. Fakir had the leftover stew simmering on the stove, had warmed some bread and placed it on the table, and she saw him put water on for tea as she walked in. He turned to look at her, and seemed to frown slightly. “Hey. Everything all right?”

“Huh? Y-yeah, I… I’m fine.” Ahiru tilted her head. “Why? Do I look upset or something?”

“Not exactly, just…” His frown deepened. “I don’t know, you just seemed… maybe I’m imagining things, but you didn’t seem to be very happy.”

“Oh no, don’t worry, I’m fine.” Ahiru shook her head and walked forward to stand near the stove at his side. “I guess maybe I was just kind of lost in thought… I don’t know if you heard the doorbell, but Hermia came by with letters for me from my friends and I was reading them in the sitting room after I finished dusting… I guess I was kind of thinking about what they wrote about.”

“Oh.” Fakir picked up a ladle and stirred the stew. “They still write to you?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru frowned. “Why – why wouldn’t they? Do you… do you think I’m not fun to write to or something?”

“I didn’t say anything like that, idiot.” Fakir shook his head. “I just meant that… well, my mother moved here from a different country to marry my father, and after she did she stopped really hearing from her old friends back home because they got so caught up in their own lives that they started neglecting her. Not because of anything wrong with her, but because sometimes friendships across great distances can fade away or grow apart if the effort isn’t put into them from both sides.”

“Oh. That makes sense.” Ahiru looked down at the floor. “Though I probably will stop hearing from one of them as often now, since she’s getting married sometime this year… she even mentioned that in her letter, that she probably wouldn’t write as often because she’ll be too busy being married and all that stuff.”

“I’m sorry.” Ahiru looked up to see Fakir gazing sympathetically at her, and she blinked.

“What? Why are you sorry?” She tilted her head again. “You didn’t do anything, why are you apologizing?”

“Because it seems like that makes you unhappy.” Fakir returned his attention to the stew. “So I was expressing my apologies in the same way you’d apologize to someone for their loss.”

“Oh, okay. That makes sense. Although, I…” She trailed off, one hand coming up to touch her pendant.

“You what?” Fakir asked after a moment. “What’s wrong?”

“Well… not really _wrong_ … well, I guess sort of… I mean…” She fiddled with her necklace. “I don’t really feel all _that_ sad about it? Not because I hate her but because, well… she’s that friend I told you about at the Harvest Festival, remember? The one who always teases me about everything? I guess I kind of… don’t mind not talking to her as much anymore because of that and other things about the way she treats me, so I’m not that sad… but that makes me feel bad.” She bowed her head and stared at the floorboards again. “I feel bad and sad that I don’t feel more sad about it… I’m a bad person, aren’t I?”

“No, you’re not.” Fakir answered without hesitation. “You’re… you’re anything but. And it’s not wrong to not feel sorrow over losing touch with someone who isn’t good for you. She’s hurt you, whether she meant to or not, and you’re allowed to be okay with talking to her less. Or, hell, to outright be relieved. And if it means you spend more time talking to friends who _do_ value you and won’t trample on your feelings for their own amusement, than that’s a good thing and I’m not sad about it. I’d only feel sorrow if it made you truly sorrowful. But…” He hesitated slightly this time. “Well, I don’t want to tell you how to spend your time, but I’d encourage you to think about who’s really worthy of it, and in my opinion someone who treats you the way you’ve told me she treats you isn’t.” He paused. “No, I… sorry, that… I overstepped my bounds. I’m sorry.”

“No, no, it’s okay!” Ahiru waved her hands in front of herself. “I understand what you meant, I know you weren’t trying to be – ow!” One of her flailing hands had struck the pot that Fakir had the soup heating in, and she cried out in pain at the contact with the hot metal.

“Ahiru!” Fakir dropped the ladle onto the counter and grabbed her wrist. “Are you all right?”

“I – I think so… oh…” She whimpered a little as he carefully turned her hand to inspect where she’d burned it.

“Come on, over here.” He took her other hand too, and gently tugged her over to the basin. “I just filled this with cold water a little while ago, so this should work.” He dunked her burned hand into it, and though she whimpered and winced at first, the chill of the water did help, at least a little. “You should watch what you’re doing a little more next time, idiot – don’t ever forget that stoves, and things on them, tend to be hot.”

“I – I know.” Ahiru pressed her lips together, trying not to cry from the lingering pain of the burn. “I’m sorry…”

“You don’t have to apologize to me.” His voice softened. “I just… don’t want you to get hurt. That’s all.”

“I know, I know you don’t.” Fakir lifted her hand out of the water, and using a nearby towel he carefully patted it dry. She tried not to wince again. “Thank you… thank you for helping me.”

“It’s nothing.” He examined her hand closely. “We should put some salve and a bandage on it too, though – I know Edel keeps some in here in case of kitchen mishaps.” He let out a wry little laugh. “I had one myself some years ago, that’s how I found out.”

“Oh, I feel a little less silly, then.” Ahiru managed a small giggle despite herself. She peered down at the burn. “Do – do you think it’ll leave a mark?”

“It shouldn’t.” Fakir shook his head. “It’s just a small burn, it’ll heal soon.”

“Okay… oh, but, um, um!” Ahiru’s eyes went wide. “I – I’m sorry, I… that was really insensitive of me to ask, cause you have a scar on your hand, and I wasn’t… I didn’t mean…”

“I know.” Fakir let go of her hand and turned to glance around at the cupboards, as if trying to remember where Edel kept first aid items. “I don’t care about that kind of thing, personally. But if it’d make _you_ feel self-conscious to have one, that’s understandable, and doesn’t make you a bad person or anything.”

“I – I know, and I don’t, not really, but… but anyway, I…” She hesitated, and then reached out and gently laid her uninjured palm over Fakir’s scarred hand. The line where the knife had gone through felt slightly bumpy, and like a very small dip in his skin. “I – I always mean to ask you… does it ever hurt? Like when you’re working and stuff? I don’t know a whole lot about everything but I know there’re some nerves in our hands, and I’ve been worried that it causes you pain, and I know that’s why you work with Charon now instead of still being a knight...”

“It does sometimes.” Fakir glanced down. “There’s some numbness in my fingertips from time to time, and a… a strange sensation inside my hand I can’t quite describe. I think it’s still healing, technically. But as long as I don’t push my limits – which I’ve learned over the past few months – I can avoid some of the discomfort. You and Edel did excellent work, I have no complaints.”

“Oh… no… it’s…” Ahiru pulled her hands away to hide her face, and Fakir walked over to a cupboard and opened it. “I – I didn’t do that much, really… it was mostly Edel… she makes the medicines and everything the best, I’m still just her apprentice…”

“But you helped her make them, and you helped take care of me. That’s not nothing. You deserve praise as well.” Fakir took down a jar of salve and a roll of bandages before closing the cupboard. “Here. Sit down at the table, and I’ll put this on you.”

“O-okay, but… what about the food?” Ahiru cast an anxious glance at the stove.

“… Fine. Just a second.” Fakir set the salve and bandages down on the kitchen table and then returned to the stove, where he carefully removed the soup pot from the fire, doused the flames, and set the now-boiling water to brewing tea for them. “Does that make you feel better?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded and sat down. “I don’t want there to be a big mess or anything just because you were tending to _me_ …”

“Hmph.” Fakir pulled a chair over so he could sit beside Ahiru and unscrewed the lid of the salve jar. “Give me your hand.”

“O-okay.” Ahiru laid her hand on Fakir’s outstretched palm, and he dipped his other index finger into the jar.

“If this hurts, tell me and I’ll stop.” He touched his fingertip to her burn and then began to carefully rub the salve onto it. “I don’t want to cause you more pain.”

“It doesn’t hurt.” Ahiru shook her head. “Not at all. Don’t worry.” If anything, she felt good. _Too_ good. The burn itself still throbbed a little, but the cooling salve was helping, and Fakir was just so _gentle_. Having her hand in his was so nice, and the way he was touching her… oh, it was almost too much. He had calluses on his fingertips, and the way they felt against her skin made her want to shiver. What would it feel like if he touched her in other places besides her hands? As much as she wanted to imagine it, she tried not to think about it – not now, not here, and besides, that only complicated her muddle over him further. She didn’t need that.

“All right. That’s good.” He finished applying the salve and left her, briefly, to wash his hands; when he’d done that he returned and bandaged her up. “There. Does that feel any better?”

“Yep!” Ahiru nodded, and beamed up at him. “Thank you, Fakir!”

“You’re welcome.” He finally smiled at her, making her heart lurch. “I’ll just put these away and then we can finally eat, if you’re hungry.”

“Oh, definitely.” Her stomach rumbled a little, and she giggled. “Sorry to make you worry, and delay you eating too… you must be _really_ hungry.”

“I’m fine.” Fakir shrugged and turned away. “Don’t worry about me. Just be careful with your hand now.” She followed him to the stove to serve herself, but he shook his head as if to gently ward her off. “No, don’t – I’ll serve you some, if that’s all right. Just so the ladle doesn’t bother you.”

“Okay, that’s fine.” Ahiru went back to the table, and waited for Fakir to bring her a cup of tea and bowl of stew. Her gaze kept straying to him as he got himself food and tea, distracting her from buttering her bread and sweetening her tea; only after Fakir had finally taken the first bite of his meal did she work up the nerve to break the quiet. “Fakir?”

He chewed and swallowed down the bite of food. “Yeah?”

“Do you… I mean… if your hand gets all the way better, do you think you’d ever… try to get reinstated as a knight?” She stared down at her still-steaming bowl of stew and stirred it a little, watching the hunks of beef and vegetables float around.

“… No.” Fakir took a bite of his bread, and washed it down with some tea. “I think… well, even if it returns to the way it was, I don’t… I think I’ve made peace, by now, with that part of my life being over. Some part of me still mourns the loss, but I’m adjusting to life here and finding that I like it. There’s a simple satisfaction to the work I do with Charon and Lysander, and the quiet is… it’s good for me, I think. I keep busy and don’t dwell on things, and living here… I think I needed to get away from the castle.”

“How come?” Ahiru reached for her tea and gingerly sipped it.

“I…” He paused. “I think the stress, most of all. I was being run ragged those last few months, and I didn’t fully realize how badly until after the attack.” His mouth formed into a lopsided half-smile. “In a strange way, it was the first time I’d gotten to relax in months. As much as you can when you’ve been stabbed and slashed like that, at least.”

“Oh no, don’t remind me.” Ahiru shuddered.

“Sorry.” His voice dropped and so did his gaze. “I didn’t mean to upset you… I know that that bothered you.” It was the first time either of them had brought up, in any fashion, what she’d said on Yule.

“It’s okay, I know you didn’t mean to.” Ahiru spooned up some meat and broth and ate it. “I – I’m glad you’re happy here, or at least getting there… I know it was sad for you at first and it’s probably _still_ kind of sad, but it’s good you’re settling in.”

“I still feel twinges of sorrow sometimes.” He drank some tea. “But I’ve also learned to step back and see what’s good about living here, and why it’s better for me in the end. So don’t worry about me.”

“I can’t really promise not to, cause you’re my friend, but okay.” Ahiru smiled. “I’m glad it’s been good for you here.”

His lips curved up in a small but genuine smile. “It has.”

They ate quietly after that, for the most part; they were comfortable enough in each other’s company by now that they didn’t feel the need to struggle to fill the silence, and so the conversation happened in fits and starts without awkwardness. They primarily discussed what they’d done before lunch and what they intended to do afterwards – Fakir knew that he needed to let his hand rest, so he planned to simply relax in his room and read. Not the book they were currently studying with Mr. Katz, but one of the many he’d brought with him from the castle that he’d been meaning to read for years. She chatted with him a little about it, and then revealed after eating some more of her meal that she was going to try and store those herbs and flowers Edel had mentioned.

Ahiru headed to the basement to do just that when they finished cleaning up. She made it as far as the second to last stair when the doorbell rang; a curious frown forming on her face, she turned and hurried back up and towards the front door. Who could that be now? Did Hermia have more letters for them? She hoped it wasn’t someone with a medical emergency – she’d have to send Fakir running off to Ebine’s to get Edel while she stayed behind and tended to them as best she could with the meager training she’d had so far. The idea made her feel slightly queasy.

All her nervous imaginings fled, however, when she opened the front door and saw who had actually come to pay them a visit. “Ah! Oh… oh… w-welcome, welcome, I…”

“Hello, Ahiru.” Rue smiled warmly. “May we come in? I apologize for the lack of notice, but nothing could be done about that, I am afraid. It was something of a sudden whim of my husband’s.”

“Of – of course!” Ahiru said, her voice squeaking slightly. Of all the people she might’ve expected to see on the front step the royal couple was most certainly _not_ among them. “A-and don’t worry about it, it’s nice to see you… a-are you well?”

“We thrive, Ahiru, no fear.” Rue’s smile widened. “And yourself?”

“I – I’m fine, thank you.” Ahiru shut the door behind them as they walked all the way in. “B-but, um… what can I do for you, to – to what do we owe the honor?” Her mind raced as she struggled to think of all the things one was supposed to say to important guests, unexpected or otherwise.

“Is Fakir about?” Siegfried glanced around the front hall. “It is him that we’ve come to visit today; if he’s out and won’t return for a while we’ll call again at a better date, but we’d much prefer to see him today.”

“Y-yeah, he’s here.” Ahiru nodded. “I – I’ll just show you to the sitting room and then go fetch him, if that’s all right?”

“Perfect.” Siegfried smiled, and seemed to relax a little. “Thank you, miss – Ahiru, is it?”

“Y-yep.” Ahiru nodded again, and curtsied a little. “It – it’s nice to meet you, your highness.”

“Likewise.” He bowed slightly. “And thank you for your graciousness in the face of us just dropping in on you unexpectedly.” He laughed and scratched the back of his head. “Forgive the intrusion, it is just – well, a circumstance arose – it was something of a whim, as Lady Rue says, but not entirely, we…” He stopped. “But I mustn’t say anymore.”

“Oh now, can we not tell her?” Rue gave him an imploring look. “I am certain that I will be consulting Edel on at least a few things during this time and after, and Ahiru _is_ her apprentice, and that means discretion is expected and honored. And she will find out either today or tomorrow in any case; I cannot see the harm in it.”

“If you wish.” Siegfried shrugged. “If you’re certain she can be trusted, then by all means. It’s technically your news most of all, in the end.”

“Thank you, my love.” Rue turned to Ahiru. “Ahiru, the truth of the matter is that we have come to relay some important news to Fakir – our official announcement for the entire principality goes out tomorrow, but my dear husband desired that his best friend hear of it first before the rest. And I would like to tell you as well.” She took Ahiru’s hands and laid them on her stomach – which now finally registered as being noticeably larger than it had been the last time they’d met – and smiled. “Ahiru, I am with child. Is it not marvelous?”

“Oh!” Ahiru’s eyes widened. “I – of course it is! Oh, congratulations, Lady Rue!” She clapped her hands together as Rue released them. “I’m so happy for you!”

“Thank you, Ahiru.” Rue took her hands again and squeezed them. “I am happy too, and excited, and a bit anxious – but who would not be? There are many things that may go wrong. But I have been assured of having the best physician in the land, and as I said before I fully intend to consult Edel as well, which will do much to ease my mind.”

“Oh, yes, I’m sure it would, cause Edel is so good at what she does!” Ahiru’s eyes sparkled. “Oh, I really am so happy for you… when is the baby due?”

“Sometime in late summer is the physician’s estimate,” Siegfried said. “We received confirmation yesterday, after some time of suspicion, caution, and I suppose superstition.” He laughed. “The arrangements have been made for an announcement to go out tomorrow, but today I realized that I should tell Fakir first before the whole of the land learns.”

“Awww, that’s so nice of you! Oh, b-but, I shouldn’t keep you waiting out here any longer, sorry.” Ahiru’s face flushed. “C-come right this way…”

She led them to the sitting room, all the more glad now that she’d cleaned it this morning; it wouldn’t have to done to have royalty sit on a dusty sofa, after all. Once she’d determined that they didn’t require anything from her apart from Fakir’s presence she hurried off, promising that it wouldn’t take long to fetch him.

His door was shut when she got there, so Ahiru gingerly knocked on it. “Fakir?”

“Yeah? Come on in.”

She eased the door open to find Fakir sitting up on his bed, and he marked his place in his book and set it aside as she entered. “U-um, sorry to bother you, but… Siegfried and Rue are here, and they want to talk to you.” She swallowed.

“… Oh. I see.” His expression darkened for a fleeting moment before becoming neutral. “All right. I’ll talk to them. Where are they?”

“I – I took them to the sitting room.” Fakir rose from the bed, and followed her as she walked back the way she’d come. “I thought that would be the best place, cause it’s for receiving guests, after all…”

“True.”

Ahiru opened the door for him when they got there, and Siegfried and Rue broke off whatever conversation they’d been in the middle of so they could stand up. “I – I’ll just leave you all to talk privately…” She curtsied again and closed the door behind herself, leaving Fakir alone with them.

A sigh of relief escaped her as she walked away: _now_ she could finally get to work in the basement. True, Edel had said she didn’t _need_ to do anything, but she still wanted to do all she could to help, and she wasn’t really in the mood to sit around and read anyway. So herb and flower storage it was.

What she hadn’t banked on, however, was the location of the sitting room. Both it and the workroom where they did their brewing sat directly above the basement; this meant that she could hear muffled voices coming from above her, through the floorboards. At first they were too quiet for her to discern any specific words, and she easily tuned it out as she started storing and labeling herbs and flowers. A small jar of the snowdrops she’d picked on New Year’s came first, as that was the quickest and easiest of the available plants, and when she’d labeled that and put it away she began the more arduous task of storing the large quantity of lavender. She hadn’t got far into that when the muffled voices from above rose somewhat in volume, and became infinitely more distracting. She tried her best to shut them out, but fragments of the conversation nevertheless got through.

“– don’t want to talk about –”

“– must discuss it while there’s –”

“– tell you to leave it alone?”

“– owe you all our –”

“– nothing you can do, so –”

“– fool! Why will you not –”

“– out of it. This is –”

“– mine. And –”

“– to discuss. None of us –”

“– accept that. There must be –”

“– isn’t. You can’t –”

“– leaving!”

The door to the sitting room opened with a loud bang; alarmed, Ahiru dropped the lavender she’d been holding for the last few minutes onto the table and rushed back up the basement stairs. She reached the hallway in time to see Rue storming towards the front door, Siegfried close behind and quietly imploring her to calm down and think of the child. That seemed to get through to her, and she paused, taking a few deep breaths and letting him slip an arm around her. Ahiru cautiously approached, not wanting to somehow rile Rue up again. “U-um… a-are you going home now? N-not that you have to rush…”

“Hmmm? Oh, Ahiru.” Rue looked over, and her face seemed to relax a little. “Yes, I am afraid that… well, we must depart now. I am sorry for any inconveniences.”

“Th-that’s okay, just…” Ahiru hesitated. “A-are you all right? Are you feeling sick or something?”

“I…” Rue paused. “Yes, a bit unwell at the moment… but I shall be fine soon. I would prefer to recover and place my feet up in the comfort of my own home, however, and shall not impose further on you.”

“I understand.” Ahiru nodded. “I – I’ll walk you to the door, if that’s okay.”

“Oh, there is no need, I do not wish to keep you from whatever you are doing,” Rue demurred.

“N-no, you’re not, it’s fine, really…” Ahiru tried to keep her hands still, and resisted the impulse to reach for her pendant. “I’ll go with you.”

“You are too kind.” Rue smiled, though it did not reach her eyes.

Ahiru walked them the rest of the way to the front of the house, where she bid Siegfried and Rue a polite if awkward farewell before closing the door and heading back the way she’d come. Fakir stepped out of the sitting room as she drew near to it, his expression one of fury he was clearly still trying to subdue and his breathing a little heavier than normal. Ahiru stopped in her tracks as she saw him, and the look on his face softened only slightly when he saw her. “… I’m going for a ride. I’ll be back later.”

“Wh-what? When? How much later?” Ahiru called after him as he stalked away.

“Later.”

He disappeared into his room; after a few minutes he emerged again wearing his riding boots. He didn’t say a word to her as he walked past, didn’t even look at her, and a couple more tense minutes later Ahiru heard the front door slam shut so hard that it shook the house a little. She lingered in the hall for a while after that, her heart racing and her stomach churning, before finally returning to the basement and resuming her work. She wasn’t really in the mood anymore, but she needed a distraction from her confused and anxious state and figured that simple busy work would be her best option.

Unfortunately, all it did was enable her to let her mind drift away, back to the strange conversation she’d heard snatches of and the rage it had provoked in both Rue and Fakir. She ended up only doing the rest of the lavender before going back to her room and lying down on her bed with a book. But she couldn’t concentrate on that either, and ended up switching between lying down, sitting up, staring out the window, and even pacing around. Fakir hadn’t specified when he’d be back, and she couldn’t relax until he did. The only thing she _could_ do was anxiously try to while away the afternoon somehow.

The hours dragged, and every long minute seemed to test Ahiru’s frazzled nerves more than the last one had. She watched the sky grow darker as the sun set, turning pink and then purple, all the while straining her ears to listen for any sound of the front door opening. When it finally came she all but leapt out of bed and ran, only to sag as she found Edel at the front door. Her disappointment didn’t go unnoticed, and she explained to Edel about what had happened after lunch, wringing her hands the whole time. Edel, for her part, seemed somewhat perturbed by the bits of overheard argument that Ahiru remembered, but in the end shook her head and declared it none of their business before assuring her that Fakir would probably be home soon and not to worry. It did nothing to relax Ahiru, but she agreed nevertheless to head to the kitchen and have some dinner with Edel.

Fakir didn’t come back while they ate, and so it ended up being that Edel was the only one that truly had a meal; Ahiru’s stomach was too full of knots to dare try putting any food in it. She picked at what she’d taken and let her tea grow cold, and when Edel had finished she volunteered to do all her clean-up for her as she’d wait up for Fakir in here anyway. Edel pursed her lips and seemed ready to argue the matter, but after a moment’s pause acquiesced, and left the kitchen after thanking Ahiru and trying once again to reassure her that he was fine and would return soon.

She’d just finished drying Edel’s plate when she heard the distant noise of a door opening and closing. She froze, plate in hand, and strained her ears to try and discern which door it might have been, hoping it wasn’t merely Edel moving about the house. She soon heard footsteps drawing near, and took a deep breath to try and calm her pounding heart as they got closer. When the door opened to reveal Fakir, she nearly dropped the plate. “Fakir!”

“Hey.” He looked calmer than he had when he’d left; he glanced around at the kitchen, his gaze falling on the dinner spread still sitting on the table. “You left that out?”

“I… I…” Ahiru somehow had the presence of mind to put the plate on the counter before burying her face in her hands as she burst into tears. “You… you… I’ve been…” She trailed off, shaking her head.

“Shit… _shit_ …” He didn’t even bother holding himself back from letting the profanity slip out; when she looked up she saw an expression of mingled guilt and horror on his face, and his gaze darted away when their eyes met. “Ahiru, I… I’m so… I’m sorry…”

“Wh-where…” She hiccupped. “Where _were_ you? You were gone for so long, and I didn’t know where you were or when you were coming back, or if you were okay or…” She trailed off.

“I didn’t… that is, I…” Fakir swallowed audibly enough that Ahiru heard it between sniffles. “I didn’t realize I’d been gone so long until the sun started going down… I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Ahiru took a gulping breath to try and calm her sobs. “W-well, you _did._ ”

“I’m sorry.” His voice was soft and full of shame. “I know that doesn’t make things better and I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I… I want you to know that all the same. For your sake.”

“You didn’t answer my question.” Her voice came out more petulant than she wanted it to, and Ahiru winced slightly. “Where were you?”

“That field. The one with the well.” He stared at the floor. “I needed time to think… to cool off.” He sighed. “And I ended up taking too much time.”

Ahiru hiccupped again, and wiped at her nose with the handkerchief she’d pulled out of her robe’s pocket. Her stomach flipped over as she remembered that it was the one he’d given her on New Year’s. “Do you – do you feel better now?”

“About what happened earlier, you mean?” He shifted slightly on his feet. “Yeah… I guess.”

“Is – is everything going to be okay with that?” Ahiru took a step towards him. “What was that about, anyway? I don’t want to pry, but if I can help… a-and I’ll keep it a secret, you know I will.”

“I… I can’t talk about it.” Fakir shook his head. “It’s not that I don’t trust you, but… even if you could do something, I really can’t talk about it. I’m not… I _can’t_.” He shook his head again, his eyes darting around the room.

Ahiru tilted her head. “You mean, cause it’s private royal business or something?”

“… Yes.” Fakir relaxed slightly. “Yes, it is.”

“I understand.” Ahiru wiped a stray eyelash out of her eye. “I won’t bug you about it again… sorry.”

“Idiot. You have nothing to be sorry for.” Fakir sighed again. “I’m the one who hurt _you_.”

“It’s okay.” Ahiru shook her head as Fakir opened his mouth. “Really, it is… I know you didn’t mean to, and you apologized, and I understand that you were really upset and needed time away, so…” She took another deep breath and let it out. “Let’s just move on, okay?”

“You’re far too kind to me.” Fakir shoved some of his hair out of his face where it had come loose from his ponytail. “I’m just… I’m going to have dinner now, you don’t… you can go if you don’t want to be around me.”

“N-no, I… I do, that’s why I waited for you.” Ahiru twisted her damp handkerchief a little. “I – I didn’t realize I’d get so upset, though… b-but anyway, do you want me to make you some tea or something?”

“No, I’ll do it.” Fakir retied his hair, and then rolled his sleeves up. “Go ahead and sit down, if you’re staying.”

“O-okay.” Ahiru sat back down in her chair, and glanced at her unfinished food. “I guess I should eat too…”

“What?” Fakir turned back to look at her. “You haven’t yet?”

“Well, I… I _tried,_ but…” Ahiru looked away, swallowing. “I was so worried that my stomach was too queasy to hold anything down, so I kind of stopped…”

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Fakir’s shoulders slump, and he looked like he didn’t know what to say. Finally, he let out a quiet sigh and turned away. “… Yeah. You should eat. I…” The kettle rattled as he set it down on the counter. “I’m sorry.”

“I told you, it’s okay now.” Ahiru picked up a piece of bread and took a bite. “Oh, but, um… could you make enough for both of us, if that’s not too much trouble? I let mine get cold…”

“Sure.” He put the water on to boil, and while they waited Ahiru ate more of her meal and Fakir took down a tin of tisane. Several minutes passed before Fakir spoke again, breaking the silence. “Hey, so… well… that is, I…” He turned his empty teacup round and round on the counter. “If you’d like, later this week we could… the blue roses are blooming in that field so if you want some I could take you… but you don’t have to, I’m sure you know the way by now and you’d rather walk…”

“Oh no, I’d rather go with you, if that’s okay!” Ahiru kicked her legs back and forth beneath the table. “I want to go for another ride, and it’s more fun together, and… yeah.”

“… All right.” He seemed to relax a little. “Maybe on Saturday?”

“That sounds good.” She smiled up at him, and for a moment it looked like he wanted to smile back at her but couldn’t quite bring himself to just yet because of lingering guilt. “I’ll look forward to it.”

After that they began to ease out of the awkwardness that had overtaken them; Fakir remained somewhat somber, but conversed more easily, and even managed a smile by the end. She helped him clean up and put everything away, and then they parted at their bedroom doors, saying goodnight only after Fakir had apologized one more time, and been assured again that she forgave him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holst: Referred originally to a person from the region of Holstein (between Germany and Denmark). (Yes, as in Holstein cow.)


	18. Chapter 18

True to her word, Lilie sent Ahiru an invitation to her upcoming wedding close on the heels of the letter announcing her engagement. It arrived slightly over a week and a half later. Hermia delivered it amidst a stack of other letters – most of them addressed to Edel – midmorning near the end of February. Inside an unassuming beige envelope lurked a piece of paper that had been dyed a particularly lurid shade of purple and embossed with gold lettering; it caught Edel’s eye as she poured tea at lunch, and she made a somewhat wry remark about how much _that_ must have cost, even as Ahiru stared down in a daze at it. If even the _invitation_ was this expensive, what sort of extravagance should she expect at the wedding? They’d set the event in the middle of May, and Lilie had included an extra note (also on purple paper) not just imploring Ahiru to write back immediately but _ordering_ her to. Half-hoping that it would be too busy a season to be spared for out of town travel she brought it up right then and there, only to be told that she would definitely have to go and that if she needed it Edel would help her to make travel arrangements. Only Fakir noticed her expression of despair, and he met her gaze with a sympathetic look. She didn’t tell him that the invitation had specified that she was both allowed and encouraged to bring along a gentleman as escort “if a suitable one had entered her life”.

February soon passed into March, and the new month brought with it the melting of the snow. It had already begun at the end of February, and before they were three days into March it had all vanished into the ether, leaving Goldkrone looking almost as if it had never been snowed upon at all. The air felt no less cold, however, and icy rains accompanied by harsh, gusting winds began to mercilessly pelt them. It stormed on the first Friday of the month, causing Mr. Katz to cancel their lesson, but a few days later the clouds parted and gave way to bright, sunny skies that contrasted sharply with the frigid air and occasional biting winds. If their luck held, they would be able to attend that week’s class.

It was on that that Ahiru fixed her hopes every day, for she had come to enjoy the lessons even more now that Fakir was attending with her – something that needed to be considered as she tried to work out what her feelings for him really were – and she grew nervous at every cloud that seemed to pass over the sun for even a fleeting moment. But when Friday morning arrived, she awoke to the feeling of sunlight peeking through her shutter to touch her face with a tiny, barely perceptible bit of warmth. She joyfully flung open her window and found to her delight that not only was there a clear sky above, but below her window the crocuses she’d helped Edel guard against the worst of the winter frosts had finally bloomed. While birds gathered on her sill to sing and eat the seed she’d left for them Ahiru stared down at the riot of pale purple and yellow, with the occasional white one mixed in as well. It was still technically winter, of course, but these flowers carried with them a promise of spring that energized her from within.

After breakfast she and Edel proceeded to the workroom for another astrology lesson. She was now learning to write horoscopes, which was hard work and she didn’t think she quite had the hang of it yet, but she enjoyed nevertheless. She found it fascinating to learn about the traits associated with each sign and what their supposed strengths and weaknesses were; Edel explained that while of course such things varied from person to person and nobody matched their sign perfectly it all nevertheless functioned well as a guide for various things, no different from other forms of divination. That made sense to Ahiru, and she said so, gaining Edel’s approving nod.  And besides which, it was fun, and there was nothing wrong with people having a bit of fun with something as long as it didn’t hurt others.

As there were many kinds of horoscopes beyond the general daily ones, it would take her some time to learn how to draw up all of them. Near the end of the month they would be doing those involving romantic love, and compatibility between signs. That prospect had her both nervous and excited, for she knew Fakir’s sign as well as her own, and she even intended to write him up a special horoscope as part of his birthday gift next week. She couldn’t help but swing back and forth between apprehension and giddiness at the thought of discovering what the stars had to say about the idea of them as a couple, which was yet another piece of the puzzle that was her feelings for him. Ahiru supposed she could just skip ahead in her textbook and look it up now, but as she wasn’t sure she was ready to do that yet she held back.

When the lesson was over she opted to go to her room first instead of following Edel to the kitchen, so that she could organize the things she’d bring to Mr. Katz’ house later. She had her book that he’d assigned to them, her notes, and an old newspaper article about her mother, one of the few things she’d managed to retain after Herr Drosselmeyer’s death and the seizure of nearly everything in his house. Ahiru had intended for months to ask Mr. Katz about her, but between one thing and another hadn’t yet gotten around to it. This time, though, she _would_ ask. Provided the lesson was still on, of course; they hadn’t gotten a note indicating that he was ill, and the weather was dry and bright, but there was always the possibility of a cancellation at the last minute. But even if that did happen she’d stick the scrap of newspaper in with her notes, and thus have it ready for next time should today fall through somehow.

She finished by taking out a book she’d been reading for fun, and took it with her into the kitchen with the intent of maybe reading some more. The sight of Fakir at the table distracted her as always, however, and her heart fluttered as he looked up from his notes and met her gaze. “Hi.”

“Hey.” He nodded to her as she sat down. “You ready for the lesson?”

“Yep!” Ahiru nodded, making the large cowlick atop her head bounce a little. “I have everything all done and packed up and ready to go… a-and if you don’t mind, there’s something personal I want to ask him before we start talking about the book…” She looked down at her lap, where she was pressing the tips of her index fingers together.

“Why would I mind?” She risked a glance up and saw him shrug. “You’re entitled to ask him whatever you want, as long as you’re not prying into his private business.”

“Oh no, it’s nothing like that!” Ahiru shook her head. “I – I meant… well… he used to dance ballet, I think I told you that… and so did my mother before she married my father and had me… so I wanted to know if Mr. Katz ever knew her or heard of her or anything and if he could tell me stuff about her… do you think that’s okay?”

“I don’t see a problem with it.” Fakir turned a page in his notes. “You’ve a right to learn more about your parents, and if he can tell you anything at all, why not ask? I…” A shadow passed briefly over his face. “I asked Charon everything I could think of about my parents after they died, so believe me, I understand why you want to learn more about them. You spent even less time with them than I did with mine, right?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “They died when I was really little, I barely remember them.”

“I thought so.” Fakir traced his fingertip down one of the pages. “So don’t worry about me being bothered by taking time out of class to ask about something like that – it’s important to you, and it’s the only time you can ask anyway, given your schedule.”

“That’s true.” Ahiru’s hands relaxed in her lap. “Th-thank you… for understanding.”

“Of course.” He said it so quietly that she could barely hear it; or maybe it was intended for _only_ her to hear, given the hidden warmth she could detect in his voice. It had roughly the same effect on her as holding hands did.

“Well, I, um…” Ahiru’s gaze darted around, and she finally focused on what Fakir was doing. “O-oh, um… are those your notes for the lesson today?”

“Yeah.” Fakir turned another page. “I like to look them over one last time just before we go, to make sure I’ve written down all the thoughts I had on what we read.”

“Oh, I do that too!” Ahiru bounced a little in her chair. “Only I do that the night before, cause I probably won’t have time in the morning because of lessons… not that there’s anything wrong with the way you do it either, of course, I wasn’t trying to say _that._ ”

“I know.” Fakir closed his notebook. “And it just makes sense anyway – you have work to do on Friday mornings that I don’t. If Charon had agreed to let me work on these days I’d probably check my notes the night before like you do.”

“Do you still not like having Friday mornings off?” Ahiru pushed her book aside and leaned her elbows on the table, her chin in her hands. “I know you agreed it was best not to overwork yourself, but I don’t know if you still want to be there doing something on Fridays…”

“I do, sometimes, but that’s only when I get bored.” Fakir shrugged. “And if I know ahead of time that there won’t be a lesson, I can always go over to Charon’s and pitch in for the day if I feel up to it, or just work a few hours. He never objects to that.”

“Oh yeah, you did that last week, cause Mr. Katz sent a note on Thursday.” She nodded. “I’m glad we get to go today, cause I want to talk about the book and maybe my mother and find out what the next book is going to be.”

“Yeah.” Fakir moved the notebook aside. “Same here.”

Any further conversation on the matter was halted by Edel announcing that lunch was ready. The three then focused on serving themselves food and tea and adjusting each as they liked before beginning to eat. Smaller matters were discussed between bites, along with compliments on the meal given to Edel as per usual, and Ahiru also talked over the morning’s lessons with her. Once they’d all finished eating they worked together to clean up, and then Ahiru and Fakir headed back to their rooms to get ready to leave, while Edel went out to the garden.

Ahiru took longer to get ready than she meant to, despite having already gotten her things together earlier; she more than once nearly headed out her bedroom door only to realize she’d forgotten something, or she merely _thought_ she forgot something and went back in to check again. She finally made it out to the hall to find Fakir ready and waiting for her, and guilt squirmed around in her stomach as she saw him. “Sorry for taking so long… I’m ready to go now… well, mostly…” She grabbed her scarf and cloak and avoided his gaze.

“It’s fine. We’re not going to be late, so don’t worry. But…” She glanced up in time to see a concerned frown on his face. “Are you all right? You seem kind of… not really upset, but… unhappy maybe?”

“Um, well… yes… I mean no… I mean…” Ahiru took her scarf back off and redid it, not satisfied with her first attempt. “I guess I’m kind of… nervous. About asking Mr. Katz stuff… what he’ll say.”

Fakir’s frown deepened. “Are you afraid he’ll say something bad?”

“No, I don’t think he’d have anything bad to say, just…” She toyed with the fringe on the end of the scarf. “I don’t know… he might not know anything at all and I guess maybe I’m nervous about that, or… or I’m just nervous and I don’t really know why… sorry, it’s hard to explain.”

“No, I think I understand.” Fakir opened the door for her, and followed her out of it. “If… if it was me in that situation, I think I’d be nervous too. This is something important to you, after all. And sometimes people just experience feelings without really knowing why they are. It doesn’t mean anything bad is going to happen, they just… feel a certain way.”

“That’s true.” Ahiru waited for him to finish locking the door and then walked off beside him up the path. “We make medicines for people who have stuff like that happen to them regularly, and some of them have it really bad… that’s all I can really say about it cause I can’t say who has what thing that they come to us to help them manage, but I know what you’re talking about. Feelings aren’t always rational or explainable, sometimes they just _are_. And you can’t really shut them off.”

“No, you can’t.” Fakir seemed to sigh a little. “It’s… well, sometimes you might want to, so badly it hurts, but you can’t. All you can do is try to deal with them as best you can.”

Ahiru looked up at him, trying to read his expression. “Have… have _you_ had that happen to you? Where you wanted to not have feelings?”

“I think everyone has.” Fakir shrugged. “But yes… I’ve felt that way.”

“I – I’m sorry.” She reached out and squeezed his hand for a brief moment. “For – for whatever made you want that. I’m not going to ask cause I don’t want to pry, but if you ever need to talk to me about stuff you can.”

“I know.” He gave her a small smile. “I trust you. Probably more than anyone else at this point, honestly.”

“Wh-what?” Ahiru’s eyes widened and heat surged into her face. “N-no, I… I mean… I’m glad you trust me, that’s not what… I don’t mean… that is… I just… I don’t deserve to be trusted more than anyone else, you haven’t known me _that_ long, and I haven’t done anything to deserve it in that time, I… I…”

Fakir frowned. “Haven’t you? You listen to me without judgment, you keep secrets that I don’t want to tell anyone else about, you supported me during one of the most difficult times in my life… and all that despite that I was so rude to you at first. Why shouldn’t I trust you?”

“It… it’s not that you shouldn’t trust me at all, just…” Ahiru flailed around for an answer. “I guess I just… I don’t understand why you’d trust me more than your other friends, and your family… it doesn’t make any sense to me.”

“It does to me.” He shrugged again. “If you’re not comfortable with it, though, then –”

“No, no!” Ahiru waved her hands in the air. “That’s… that’s not what I’m saying at all, don’t feel bad or weird or anything, just… I mean, I’m glad you trust me and I’m glad we’re friends, I just don’t feel deserving of it, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want it, and I trust you the most too, I don’t want you to think that I don’t feel the same way, just… I just… I… I don’t know what I’m saying.” She hung her head and kicked at a pebble. “Sorry, I just… I’m so muddled and stupid, I can’t get my thoughts out right…”

“It happens to everyone sometimes. It doesn’t make you stupid.” Fakir moved a low-hanging branch for her; she ducked anyway, out of habit. “And I think I understand what you’re saying anyway. Don’t worry about it.”

“Oh.” Ahiru swallowed. “Th-that’s good… I always feel like I’m not making any sense and it can be hard for me to say what I really mean in a way that people immediately understand… I’m getting better cause of taking notes and writing down thoughts for Mr. Katz’s lessons, but I’m still not really good at it all the time, especially when I feel nervous, not that you make me feel nervous or anything I feel comfortable around you, just… well, I guess I’m already nervous about today so it kind of bled over and I’m jumpy and I wasn’t expecting you to say that, so…”

“I understand.” Fakir adjusted the strap of his book bag where it hung on his shoulder. “That’s happened to me too. And honestly it’s sometimes hard for me to write everything down that I’m feeling about the books, or to think of things to say… it’s not that a chapter isn’t good, I just can’t think of much to say about it. So I sometimes read it over again later and add onto my notes, because I’ll gain more insight from a second read, especially if later events in the book give new context or meaning to earlier ones. It’s probably cheating, but it’s better than having nothing to show for the time spent reading.”

“I don’t think that’s cheating.” Ahiru shook her head. “It’s not like we’re getting tested on it, and Mr. Katz never said we couldn’t reread stuff, and he’d probably agree with you that reading things over again gives you new insights and stuff.  Sometimes I wonder if some authors do that on purpose and write in such a way that their books are better when you read them a second time… and anyway it’d be kind of sad if a story never got reread at all, if nobody loved it enough to want to look at it again…”

“Who would that be sad for?” Fakir paused at the curb to let a cart rattle by, and Ahiru stopped beside him just in time. “The story, or the writer?”

“Both, I guess.” Ahiru stepped down onto the street once it was clear, crossing alongside Fakir. “I mean, obviously the author would feel sad most of all if nobody liked their work, but the story too would kind of… well, I guess sometimes I… think of things as having feelings even though I know they don’t, you know?” She looked away, her cheeks warming again. “I – I guess that’s why I reacted that way to your story about the lamp on Yule… and I always felt so sad when I saw people getting rid of stuff they could still use just because they were tired of it or it wasn’t considered fashionable anymore, because I wondered about the things’ feelings being hurt. I know that’s silly…”

“Even if it is, I don’t think you’re the only one who does that. Even I used to, sometimes.” Fakir trod on a leaf, and she heard it crunch under his booted foot. “I had to learn not to when it came time to have little space for things in my room in the knights’ quarters, and I needed to choose only the most important things to take along with me and what to put in storage at Charon’s house. I’d like to go through what’s in the attic, but…” He sighed. “I still wouldn’t have enough room for all of it even now… my room at Edel’s is bigger, but there’s just too much up there. I don’t know if I’d keep all of it, but still.”

“Well, that’s something you can do when you move out and get a house of your own.” Ahiru tucked a stray wisp of hair behind her ear and tried to ignore the knot that threatened to tie itself in her stomach at the thought of Fakir moving out. “You can just wait till then to do stuff like that.”

“… True.” Something flickered in his eyes, but vanished almost immediately. “It’ll all just… stay put until I need it, it’s not like Charon needs the attic space badly enough that he’s started to nudge me about clearing my stuff out.” He let out a dry laugh. “Believe me, if he did need the space, he would bother me about it. And not too subtly either.”

Ahiru giggled. “Would he _think_ he was being subtle?”

“Maybe, the first couple attempts.” Fakir gave her the lopsided smile that always made her heart race. It somehow seemed like he only did that when it was just the two of them, though maybe her memory was deceiving her. “But then he’d drop any pretense of subtlety and just get to outright nagging.”

“That sounds like he’s nagged you about stuff before.” Ahiru glanced at a shop window where various gems were on display. “Has he?”

“Yeah.” Fakir took her arm for a moment so he could gently steer her away from where an oblivious child was running headlong in her direction, pursued by the harried-looking parents. “About various things. Some of them valid, others none of his business. Not that that fact ever stopped _any_ parent from nagging their child about something.” He rolled his eyes.

Ahiru giggled again. “That’s true. I’m glad he’s not bothering you about this, though, cause I know you still need time to figure out everything before you even think about moving out of Edel’s house.”

“Yeah.” Fakir nodded. “I’m not remotely ready to – to go yet. I can’t think about getting a place of my own. I haven’t even bothered considering where I would live if I moved out, there’s no point to it.”

“I can see that.” Ahiru nearly bumped into Fakir as she dodged around someone hanging up a new sign above their door. “Do you even know what you’re going to do with the rest of your life?”

“I’ll…” He paused. “I’ll probably just keep working at the forge. It’s good work that suits me, Charon is flexible with the hours, he’s training and paying me and I like it there.”

“What about Lysander?” Ahiru asked. “Are you two going to take over the forge together when Charon retires, or will you both have your own separate ones in different parts of town? I’m kind of confused about that…”

“… I haven’t really thought about that.” Fakir glanced away. “I guess I just… well, they haven’t talked about it either. Maybe Lysander wants to open his own business closer to where his family lives. I don’t know. He barely talks about anything at all, so it’s hard to know what he’s thinking or what he wants or… well, anything about him, really. If he ends up wanting to take over Charon’s shop that’s fine with me, I mean, I… well, in the first place, he has more of a right to it thanks to his years of formal apprenticeship. It wouldn’t be fair of me to swoop back in and take something from him that he’s earned through his hard work, just because I’m Charon’s son.”

“That’s true, it wouldn’t be fair to him at all.” Ahiru looked over at him. “Still, I – I hope you can find something that’s good for you when that time comes, cause you deserve it too, maybe even something close by so you can still live by the forest, I know you like the area where Edel’s house is… maybe you should ask Charon what all the plans for that stuff are.”

“… Maybe.” Fakir halted as they reached the front door of Mr. Katz’s house. “But I’m not really that worried.” He rang the door bell, interrupting what Ahiru opened her mouth to say.

As she tried to regain the thread of her thoughts so she could ask him something, Mr. Vogel opened the door. He peered at them and nodded. “Right this way, Mr. Katz is expecting you.”

“Oh good, I’m glad he’s not feeling sick or in too much pain today,” Ahiru said as she followed Fakir and Mr. Vogel inside. “I’m glad he’s doing better.”

“Yes, the weather clearing up has been most beneficial to him.” He led them into the parlor, where Mr. Katz sat in his usual chair. A nice blaze had been built in the fireplace, giving the room warmth that felt extra pleasant after the long, cold walk. “Sir, your students are here.” He bowed.

“Ah, yes, hello, you two.” Mr. Katz nodded to them and then to Mr. Vogel, who nodded back and then left the room as Ahiru and Fakir walked in. “How does this fine day find you? A bit chilly, I’d wager, but at least we’re all dry.”

“Yeah, it’s still really cold outside, but it’s not storming anymore, at least.” Ahiru put her bag down on the chair she always sat in, and then moved to the fireplace to peel off her gloves and warm her hands. “I mean, the rain’s good for all the plants and stuff, but I know it makes your knee hurt so I’m glad for your sake that it’s not raining today and you’re not in so much pain… a-and the crocuses are already blooming, so that’s good too!”

“Ah, how lovely.” Mr. Katz sighed happily. “I’ve always found this to be a particularly interesting time of year… the very end of winter, just on the cusp of spring, with the new season inching its way in and flowers just starting to bloom… it fills the heart with excitement for what’s to come. If the winds were less harsh and the air less cold, I would lie out in the sun and enjoy it all… the bright light and clear skies are ever so deceptive.” He laughed, making his mustache twitch.

“It’ll happen soon enough, I’m sure,” Ahiru said as she moved back to her seat. “Spring’s not _that_ far away.”

“True.” Mr. Katz’s gaze roamed round the room and settled on the empty table. “Oh, but my apologies – shall I ring Mr. Vogel and tell him to prepare some tea for us all? I know you’ve likely eaten already, but are you in need of something hot to warm up your insides after your walk?”

“No thanks, I’m fine.” Fakir shook his head. “It’s warm enough in here.”

“Yeah, I’m fine too.” Ahiru pulled her things out of her bag and laid them on her lap, her stomach fluttering nervously as she remembered about the newspaper clipping. “But thank you anyway.”

“Very well, then.” Mr. Katz leaned back in his chair and folded his hands in his lap. “Shall we begin? There was very little of the book left to read and take notes on, so this might not be a very long lesson.”

“U-um, yeah, I – I’m ready, b-but…” Ahiru swallowed, the butterflies in her stomach threatening to carry her lunch back up her throat. “Could – could I ask you about something first? It’s kind of personal… well, I mean… it doesn’t pry into your life, not really, just… I’ve meaning to ask you something for a while now and… if you don’t want me to I’ll understand, I won’t.”

“Hmmm, well, that depends on the question.” Mr. Katz sat up a little straighter. “What is it that you wish to learn about? I need to know the nature of your inquiry before I can decide whether to answer it or not.”

“W-well, it’s…” Ahiru fumbled in her notebook for the newspaper clipping, and took it over to Mr. Katz. “S-see this? It’s an article about my mother… she used to be a ballerina…” She held it out to him with a slightly shaking hand. “I – I was just wondering if you’d ever heard of her, or – or knew her, and if you did, I’d want to know what you can tell me about her…”

“Oh, now, that shouldn’t be a problem to answer, I can’t see anything objectionable about that.” Mr. Katz took the clipping from her and began to read. “Let’s see now… hmmm…  ah! Yes! I do recall her, of course, how could I not… her nickname was Princess Tutu, and it stuck so well that it became her stage name after a while.” His mustache twitched a little with fond amusement. “Alas, I never did get to become truly acquainted with her… she was a member of the Eleki Troupe, as you will have read in this article, and traveled around performing, whereas I remained stationary during my career. I did manage to see her perform once, however, and brought flowers to her dressing room door… I was one of a crowd of adoring fans, but she treated me graciously in that single moment I had of conversing with her.”

“Oh.” Ahiru’s shoulders drooped slightly. “I… that’s too bad that you never _really_ met her...”

“Yes.” Mr. Katz frowned. “I am terribly sorry that I cannot tell you more – she was older than I, and so her career began earlier, and we moved in different circles in the ballet world even during that brief time when we were both performing. I will always regret that we never had the chance to share a stage together, and perhaps never more than now, when it has cost you the opportunity to learn more about her.” He sighed. “I am truly sorry, Miss Ahiru.”

“It’s okay.” She took the article back as he held it out to her, and returned to her seat, where she stuck the clipping safely inside her notebook. “It’s not your fault, and I knew you might not be able to tell me anything, so I tried not to get my hopes up, I just thought I’d ask…”

“But you _are_ disappointed.” Mr. Katz sighed again. “I know it cannot be helped, but I do wish that I could… well, that I could help you learn more. You are clearly hungry for information and I have let you down.”

“No, no, please don’t feel bad!” Ahiru shook her head. “It really isn’t your fault, and I don’t blame you at all, I don’t want you to feel bad for something that you couldn’t help, I mean… I didn’t even know what the age difference would’ve been or where you performed or anything, I just thought I’d ask in case you knew anything at all. A-and yeah, it’s sad that you didn’t, but I’m not disappointed in _you_ , just in… in the situation, that I don’t really know _anyone_ who was her friend. I met somebody years ago and they told me some stuff… but I guess all the other troupe members who knew her live in other places and I have no idea how to find them and I can’t go traveling around anyway…” She sighed. “I have a few things from her at least, and some memories, so… I guess I should try to be happy with what I have.”

“Possibly.” Mr. Katz shrugged. “All the same, I hope an opportunity to learn more presents itself to you someday.”

“Thank you, me too.” Ahiru fidgeted a little. “So, um… maybe we should get started now? Sorry to delay it with my question…”

“Nonsense, it took but a few minutes and we haven’t much of the book to discuss anyway.” Mr. Katz reclined in his chair again. “To summarize, the narrative concluded with Albrecht giving up his life rather than condemning Swanhild to suffer under her curse forever, and she was so devastated by the loss that she perished of a broken heart, and ever after her spirit haunted his grave, guarding it from any desecration the wicked wizard might inflict upon it.” He brushed some dust off his pant leg. “In any case, it is a popular story, widely considered a classic and a staple of literary education… but what do the two of _you_ think of its much-vaunted ending?”

“I, um… I didn’t like it.” Ahiru shifted in her seat and flipped through the pages of her notes. “One of my friends from when I lived in the city loved it and always used to recommend it to me, and now I see why… I can see why _she_ would like it, but it really wasn’t to my taste.” She squirmed. “I – I hope that’s okay...”

“My dear, there is no need to conform to popular opinion – your interpretation is just as valid as that of someone who _does_ highly regard it. And popularity is not always an accurate gauge of quality.” Mr. Katz shook his head. “Tell me more – tell me about why it did not sit well with you, and offer up your theories as to why it would resonate with some but not others, if you feel comfortable doing so.”

“All right… well…” Ahiru smoothed down her skirts and peered at her notes. “Let’s see… w-well, I wrote down that it seemed to be kind of unnecessarily tragic? I mean, I know that the wizard was a really bad guy and that he was really powerful, but so was Albrecht, and Swanhild was supposed to have magic too, so why couldn’t they fight together and defeat him? It felt like the author was trying to have a sad ending for the sake of a sad ending and kind of forgetting stuff he established earlier in the story or ignoring it, and I don’t like that. And they just seemed to kind of accept that they couldn’t beat him without even trying, I didn’t like that either.”

“Hmmm.” Mr. Katz stroked his mustache. “I don’t wish to reveal my own feelings on everything, so as not to unduly influence you… so I will present to you things I have come across in various commentaries on the story, and in discussions with other students. There are those who feel that their resignation to the wizard being undefeatable lends an air of realism to it… that is, that fate itself in reality is unchangeable, and that it’s futile to try and change it.”

“I don’t agree with that at all.” Ahiru shook her head. “I mean, yeah, okay… not everything can be changed in the end. But how can you really know until you try? It’s… it’s like…” She paused to gather her thoughts. “If – if your life is a story, then you should be trying to write it yourself, you shouldn’t decide you can’t do anything without trying first.  Some stuff will be really hard, but that just means you have to work hard, and even if you fail, at least you tried. Albrecht and Swanhild just kind of gave up without trying anything at _all._ ”

“Sometimes there isn’t anything that can be done.” Fakir had his head down as he looked over his own notes. “Some things just can’t be fought against. I think they knew that that was one of them.”

“No, that’s my point, they _didn’t_ know.” Ahiru frowned. “They didn’t even _try,_ they just accepted what somebody else had told them and they didn’t try to find out otherwise. If they’d died trying to defeat him, that’d be one thing, but they didn’t – he just gave up his life and that was that. I don’t understand why he didn’t try to fight for her or why she’d let him do that, it doesn’t make sense.”

“A contentious debate among people who study the book, to be sure.” Mr. Katz reached for a handkerchief and dabbed at his nose. “The divide primarily seems to be between those who feel as you do, Miss Ahiru, and those who see it as a celebration of love, of loving another person so much that you’d sacrifice yourself for their sake.”

“That’s something that _should_ be celebrated, though, isn’t it?” Fakir looked up from his notes. “I’ve always heard – and been told – that being willing to die for someone is one of the highest expressions of love. I’d never read this particular book before, but I was taught about a similar one years ago, and something in it stuck with me, that I thought of here… it was said that the love one character had for the other burned its brightest at the moment of their sacrifice. And my teacher told me that that was because that sort of feeling is the purest form of love there is.”

“There are many that agree with that stance.” Mr. Katz’s mustache twitched. “And there are many who do not. I think I will now abandon my temporary pretense at neutrality, and reveal that I am most emphatically in the latter group. Self-sacrificial love may burn brightly indeed… but what if the flame were to be allowed to be continued to burn? What would become of it?”

Fakir frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Let us say… for instance… that Albrecht intended to give up his life, but instead survived somehow, and so did Swanhild.” Mr. Katz grasped his cane, and rose slowly to his feet. “Would they be able to sustain that love over years? Or would it burn out on its own?” He stalked slowly over to the window. “A candle, too, may burn brightly before it is about to be snuffed out… but if one lets it burn, it will eventually peter out on its own.” He coughed. “This, mrrrrr, may not be the best of analogies, but I think you might begin to see what I mean. That feeling of being willing to die for someone may burn brightly, but it cannot be sustained forever. It cannot endure. You cannot marry on that feeling alone.”

“Why not?” Fakir’s brows drew together. “If they truly love each other, enough to die for each other, why would they be unable to marry based on that love?”

“Because it is not the sort of love suitable for the unique challenges of marriage.” He stared out the window, his back to them. “Marriage is a sacred contract between individuals that demands work and patience and effort, it asks for endurance and time and steadiness. There is none of that steadiness in a self-sacrificial love like Albrecht and Swanhild’s. Their circumstances are dire, and it makes their feelings seem more intense, and such intensity flourishes in desperate moments when everything seem on the brink of tragedy. But marriage is not a fleeting moment at the end of the world. It requires stability, the kind of love that will sustain itself through not only emotional highs, but the lows as well. There are happy times during marriage, but also hard ones that will test your spirit and your commitment to your spouse. The kind of love necessary for marriage is that which inspires people not to give up and die, but to endure and live and stand by each other’s sides in good times and bad.”

“I – I’ve never been married before, but I agree.” Ahiru smoothed out one of the wrinkled pages in her notebook. “I think… I mean… it’s like what I was talking about before. They didn’t even try to find some other solution, they didn’t try to work together. I always thought that couples – and friends too – should try to work together and be a team, and that people in general shouldn’t give up so easily and let someone else decide their fate the way they did… I mean, the wizard said they could either let the curse happen or die, and they didn’t try to challenge him or _anything_. How would they be if they’d lived somehow, would they just give up every time they had a problem?”

“Exactly.” Mr. Katz turned to face her, and smiled. “Without a strong will to fight for and beside each other, it may be that their love would not have stood the test of time. The strongest of marriages are borne of the desire to, as I said already, stand by each other’s side and live _with_ one another, rather than dying _for_ one another.”

“Yeah, that sounds a lot better.” Ahiru sighed. “I would’ve liked the book more if it had had a hopeful ending like that… that’s the kind of story I like best.” Possibly part of it was wish-fulfillment, as she knew she’d never find a great love for herself like the one Mr. Katz was extolling the virtues of right now, but she also just preferred happier endings in general, so not entirely.

“Hmmm… I…” Fakir stared blankly down at his notes. “I guess… I guess I could see that…”

“Well, it is only my point of view.” Mr. Katz hobbled back to his chair. “And not very popular in certain circles. Mrrrr…” He coughed some more into his handkerchief. “I have always been wary of romanticizing such narratives, but have come up against opposition many a time when discussing the notion with others.”

“I never got why my friend liked such stories so much.” Ahiru gnawed on her lower lip a little. “I like more hopeful stories, with happy endings.” Looking back, she recalled that Herr Drosselmeyer had been overly fond of tragic narratives as well, and had praised Lilie for her “superb taste” in literature the one time they’d interacted. Something about the entire conversation had sent chills down her spine for reasons she still couldn’t quite pinpoint entirely.

“Well, to each their own.” Mr. Katz shrugged. “In any case…” He cleared his throat. “Did either of you have any additional thoughts about the climax of the story?”

“I… I don’t think so…” Ahiru scanned her notes. “I think I already told you everything… well, except maybe that I really wish the wizard had at least died from _something_ after they died too… I don’t know how, but I think he shouldn’t have gotten away with it. I know people get away with bad stuff in real life, but in a story I think you should have some… um, what’s the word…”

“Closure?” Mr. Katz suggested.

“Yeah!” Ahiru nodded. “Thank you, that’s it… but yeah… I feel like we discussed this last year with another book, but I think stories should try to be better and more interesting than real life… and they should give people stuff to hope for and try for. I don’t think just giving up and accepting a bad fate is good in a story… or, well, it’s not what _I_ want to read in a story, anyway…”

“Well, you may content yourself with the knowledge that you are not alone in that outlook.” Mr. Katz smiled. “For as many people as I have met with the opposite viewpoint, so too have I met countless others who are of a like mind with you. And indeed, with myself.” He stroked his chin. “If neither of you have anything else you wish to discuss, we can then move on to the assignment of the next book…?” He looked expectantly over at Fakir.

“Huh?” Fakir’s head snapped up, his expression faintly dazed, as if he’d just been deep in thought and then was suddenly broken out of it. “I… no.” He slowly shook his head. “I don’t have anything to add, I…” He glanced down at his notes and then closed the book. “We can move on.”

“Very well.” Mr. Katz took a pair of books off the table beside him and held them out. Ahiru got up first, and after a moment’s pause Fakir followed her over and they both retrieved their new books. “As a sort of palate cleanser after that dose of tragic narrative, I have it in mind to read a more comic novel next. I think this will be more to your tastes especially, Miss Ahiru.” His mustache quivered as he laughed.

“I hope so!” Ahiru hugged it to herself. “Oh, I’m always so excited about starting a new book…”

“A fine attitude to take.” Mr. Katz smiled. “I hope you never lose that sense of wonder, in any area of your life. It will make the things you experience more enjoyable for you.”

“I – I’ll try!” Ahiru set the book down on her lap, and then put it into her bag along with her other things. “How many chapters do you want us to read this week?”

“Three should do it.” He nodded. “This one’s chapter count is easier to divide in a manageable way, so three it is. Read, take your notes, as you always do, and good weather and health for all of us permitting we shall meet again next Friday.”

“Okay!” Ahiru stood up again, and pulled her gloves on before shouldering her bag. “Thank you again, Mr. Katz, for everything.”

“You’re welcome.” He shook her hand as she offered it. “I am sorry, again, that I could not be a better source of information about your mother. If I recall anything, I will inform you… and I may also write to some of my old contacts from my ballet days and ask around.”

“Oh, you don’t have to do that!” Ahiru wrung her hands. “I mean, that’s really nice of you, and I appreciate it, but don’t go out of your way or trouble yourself just for _me…_ ”

“It’s no trouble at all.” Mr. Katz smiled again, but then his gaze strayed to Fakir. “Are you going to join the young lady? Or did you wish to stay behind and speak privately to me?”

“Huh?” Fakir blinked several times. “Oh… no, I…” He shook his head and rose to his feet. “I… let’s go, I’m ready… sorry to keep you waiting.”

“It’s okay…” Ahiru gave him a curious glance. “Bye, Mr. Katz… take care and have a good week.”

“You too. Both of you.” He waved to them as they walked out of the parlor.

Mr. Vogel awaited them in the hall, as if he’d sensed that it was time for them to leave. “Will that be all?”

“Yes.” Ahiru nodded. “Thank you.”

“Of course.” He nodded back at her and led them to the door, where they fetched their cloaks from the pegs and put them on before stepping out. He bid them a good day, and then they were left alone on the front step as he closed up behind them.

They walked in silence for quite some time; it wasn’t until they were walking through the outskirts of Goldkrone that Ahiru summoned up the nerve to speak. “Fakir? Are… are you okay?”

“Huh?” He looked down at her with that faintly dazed expression again. “What do you mean?”

“Well, you seem kind of…” Ahiru pressed her lips together. “Not really upset, though maybe… but mostly really distracted. Is… is something bothering you?”

“Not really, just… well…” Fakir exhaled. “I’ve been given a lot to think about. Mr. Katz… he… I’ve never heard anyone repudiate the idea of self-sacrificial love being a great thing before. I’ve always heard people praising narratives like that… and of course when you train to be a knight it’s impressed upon you that you must be ready to lay down your life for prince and country at any time… that that is the highest service you can perform for those you fight to protect.”

“That makes sense.” Ahiru frowned. “I mean, that’s why I’m glad you’re not a knight anymore, so you’re not in danger of having to do that, but I see why they tell you that… I just…” She swallowed. “I hate thinking about people dying and leaving their loved ones behind, even if it _is_ for a good cause like protecting others it’s still sad.”

“… Yeah. It is.” Fakir held up the branch again for her as they came to it. “At least this new book should be happier, though, right?"

“Mmmm. Yeah. I’m looking forward to that. This one was just too sad.” Her lower lip wobbled slightly. “I… I can’t even _imagine_ losing somebody you love like that, and I don’t want to, that’s just… what a horrible thought, it’s so scary…” Did the fact that as she’d read it she’d thought about Fakir dying and started to cry just at the _idea_ of it happening mean anything? Obviously you didn’t have to be in love with someone to mourn their passing and fear losing them, but thinking about it had been so upsetting that it made her wonder. Yet _another_ thing to take into consideration as she mulled over what she felt for him and figured out if it was only platonic, or if it was romantic too.

“I… yeah.” Fakir looked down at the ground. “I hope you never have to go through that.”

“Me too. A-and you either.” Ahiru adjusted her bag. “Anyway, I think I’m going to make some tea, I’m thirsty and cold… you want some too?”

“Sure, that sounds good.” Fakir unlocked the door, and held it open so Ahiru could enter the house. “I don’t care what kind you fix, I’ll drink whichever one you choose.”

“Okay!” Ahiru brightened. “I – I’ll just put this stuff away and then take my books to my room and then I’ll get the water boiling, all right?”

“Yeah, fine, I have to put everything away too.” Fakir shrugged his cloak off and hung it on the peg. “See you in a few minutes, then.”

“Yeah!” Her mood a little brighter now, Ahiru hurried off to her room once she’d shed her cloak, gloves, and scarf, and dropped off her bag of books on her table. She didn’t bother to bring anything with her as she rushed to the kitchen, and once there wasted no time in filling the kettle with water and setting it to boil. While the water heated she considered her tea choices; after a few minutes of indecision she finally went with the green tea Edel had splurged on and blended with some orange oil, cornflowers, and orange peel. She couldn’t resist opening the tin and sniffing it because it smelled so good, and nearly dropped it when the sound of the door opening behind her startled her. Ahiru set the tin down and glanced over her shoulder to see Fakir walk in and sit down at his usual place. “I – I’ve got the water on, and I picked the green tea with oranges… is that okay?”

“I told you, I’ll drink whatever you pick.” Fakir shrugged. “And you know I like that one. So don’t worry.”

“Oh yeah…” Ahiru turned back to the counter, and focused on measuring out the loose tea they’d need. “Hmmm…” She glanced out the window. “Edel’s not in the garden anymore, I wonder what she’s doing… I didn’t see a note.”

“She’s in the basement doing something.” Fakir traced his fingertip over a knot in the wood. “I heard her down there on my way back to my room.”

“Oh, right, we have some winter flowers drying down there and she said she needed to do inventory soon.” Ahiru yawned. “Maybe I’ll help her after I finish my tea.”

“Or take a nap.” Fakir laughed softly.

“Shush!” Ahiru stuck her tongue out at him, and he laughed again. “The tea will wake me up! You’re silly!”

“So are you.” He leaned his chin on one hand  as he watched her. “Don’t you always tell me not to overwork myself? I could say the same thing to you. You deserve to rest and relax too, especially with all you’re usually doing.”

“Th-that’s different, I – I’m an apprentice, I have to…” Ahiru turned away so she could brew the tea with the water, which was just under boiling now. “I can’t help us getting so much work and so many orders…”

“I know,” Fakir said gently. “But that’s why it’s important that you take the time you do have to yourself and use it to relax. You don’t need to rush off and help her do inventory, you can have your afternoon off. Like I said, you deserve it. Even Edel takes time to do things for herself when she can. Why should you be any different?”

“W-well, I mean… I know that, just…” Ahiru took a deep breath and let it out. “I just… I feel bad when she’s working on something and I’m not, you know? It doesn’t feel right.”

“That’s what I mean.” Fakir’s eyes softened as he smiled. “You’re just as silly. Always feeling bad over things you don’t need to.”

“Yeah… well… you do that too, you’re just as bad!” She made a pouty face at him, and he laughed, which made her giggle too. “I guess we really are both alike like that, we’re both too hard on ourselves and go easy on each other…”

“Heh. Yeah.” He looked away, staring out the window at the garden, and Ahiru let her eyes linger on him for a moment before returning her attention to the tea.

Fakir… he really wasn’t at all what she would’ve expected after those first couple meetings. He’d come off so cold and rude, but as time passed by she’d found in him one of the kindest, most supportive friends she’d ever had. She really did trust him like no one else, she hadn’t just been saying that earlier to make him feel good. And aside from hiding her muddled feelings she really couldn’t bear to lie to him anyway. She wanted to tell him so much… she looked forward to talking to him at the end of a long day, even about little, mundane things. She liked seeing him first thing in the morning at breakfast. Every time they got to do something together, whether it was riding or a lesson from Mr. Katz, it was never anything less than completely enjoyable. She would never have suspected it after those initial encounters, but he was the person she had the most fun with and she truly cherished every moment spent with him. She just couldn’t sort out her true feelings – whether she was attracted to him, or falling in love, or just so wrapped up in how much fun they had together that it confused her emotions.

It wasn’t like she hadn’t had crushes before – she had. She’d even thought she was in love, or at least getting there. But she just wasn’t sure anymore, and it was hard to sort out. No one had ever told her in terms she could understand what being in love was meant to feel like, and if she’d felt it before she didn’t know. Had it been that back then? Was this it _now?_ There were things that overlapped between the two experiences, but also some stark differences, and it made it even more difficult to tell. She needed more time and thought, and maybe to ask someone who could tell her about what it was meant to be like. She just wasn’t sure who could do that for her, or how to ask even if she did know.

Ahiru shook herself out of her thoughts, and poured tea into two cups that she carried over to the table. “Here, it’s done now.” She set Fakir’s cup down just as he reached for it and their fingers brushed, sending a fresh shiver through her. “Do – do you need anything else?”

“No.” He shook his head. “I’m fine, thanks.”

“Okay.” Ahiru sat down in her usual spot across from him, and gingerly sipped her hot tea. “So, um… what are _you_ going to do after you finish your tea?”

“I’m not sure.” Fakir looked down at the cup, the light tendrils of steam wisping up in front of his face. “I might read something, or take a walk and just think… I won’t be too long, though,” he added. “I’d just stay close.”

“That’s good.” Ahiru nodded. “Cause it’s a long walk to that place I know you like to go to, with the well… if it were earlier in the day it wouldn’t be so bad, but you’d get home after dark if you went there now… not that I’m trying to tell you what to do or anything, just…” She lowered her gaze, and then took another sip of tea before she could say anything else to embarrass herself with.

“I know. You worry. That’s why I don’t want to make you worry again, or upset you.” He shifted in his seat. “It was wrong of me to do that, that day.”

“Fakir, it’s okay, I forgave you already.” Ahiru moved her hand, filled with the impulse to reach across for his, but she ultimately decided it against it before it became too obvious. “Don’t feel bad.”

“I’ll try, but…” He shook his head and sighed. “I’ve always… had a hard time forgiving myself for things. And I feel like if I don’t keep feeling bad about mistakes I’ve made, I’ll be more likely to repeat them.”

Ahiru frowned. “But – but I _want_ you to forgive yourself, and to not be mean to yourself about it. So – so please do try.”

“All right, but I can’t make any –” He broke off, staring at the window behind her with eyes that had gone slightly wider. “What the hell – who’s that and what are they doing _here?_ ”

“Huh?” Ahiru turned around so she could see what Fakir was looking at. A bit of a distance away, someone was moving in the trees – she couldn’t quite see their face amongst the foliage yet, but they didn’t look steady on their feet. As they watched in puzzled silence, the person staggered forward another couple of steps, swayed, and then collapsed to their knees. “Oh no! They must be sick, or – or hurt! Go get Edel, and I’ll go see what’s wrong!”

“All right.”

Fakir stood up and hurried out of the kitchen, while Ahiru rushed to the back door and flung it open. Picking up her skirts so she wouldn’t trip over them, she ran to the side of the person she’d seen from the window. They were kneeling on the ground, breathing heavily, their blue hair disheveled; they lifted their head at the sound of her footsteps, and Ahiru gasped as she recognized Autor, son of the Althaus family that ran a bookshop in town. “Are – are you okay?” She knelt down on the grass beside him. “What’s wrong?”

“What’s…” He stared at her, his eyes hazy and unfocused. “Wrong… wrong… oh…” He clutched at his head. “No… I couldn’t have been… I… don’t tell me I was wrong…”

“Autor, what’s the matter?” Ahiru tentatively reached out and touched his shoulder, and he cringed away from her. “What happened?”

“I…” He lowered his hands, and looked wildly around without seeming to really see anything. “They told me… he said… but I just couldn’t have been mistaken, I couldn’t be!” He slammed a fist onto the ground, scattering dirt and twigs and sending a snail flying. “I couldn’t… no…”

“Oh dear.” Ahiru looked up to see Edel standing there, Fakir right behind her. “What is troubling him?”

“I – I don’t know.” Ahiru shook her head. “He’s not making any sense.”

“Sense!” Autor laughed. “Yes, yes, this makes no sense at all… why would they reject me… I am a son of theirs, one of their own, their kind… how could they not see who and what I am? How could they…” He took his glasses off and rubbed them on his shirt. “How could they not see what I see… what I have known for so long…”

“Autor.” Edel knelt in front of him, and Ahiru stood up and backed away. “Look at me.” She laid her hands on his shoulders, and though he didn’t cringe away from her, Ahiru could see he was trembling. “Talk to me. Tell me what has happened, and why you were in the woods.”

“I… I…” He blinked several times, and his eyes gained a little bit of focus. “I went… I wanted to go home… to be with my people after so long away… and I found… I found the ring… I found the gate I’d been longing to find…”

“A fairy ring?” Fakir’s eyes narrowed. “He stepped into _a fairy ring?_ What a goddamn _fool_.”

“A fairy ring…” Ahiru didn’t know what it was supposed to look like, but it sounded spooky. She’d have to look it up later.

“And what happened next?” Edel asked, her voice steady and calm. “What happened after you stepped into the ring?”

“I… it took me… it took me to… to their… my…” Autor’s hands gripped at the dirt. “And I thought I was home, but they told me… they told me…” He closed his eyes. “They said… they said I’m human. _Human!_ _Me!_ Can you believe that?” He opened his eyes and let out another wild laugh. “You’d think they’d know better! Me, a human… can you believe that?” He made a choked noise that was halfway between a laugh and a sob.

“I could’ve told you that,” Fakir muttered.

“Shhh, don’t,” Ahiru said, casting a nervous glance at Autor. He didn’t seem to have heard, though, focused on wiping at his face and hair with his dirty hands. He was rude, and a little creepy towards Rue too, but she nevertheless felt kind of bad for him; he’d clung so tightly to his idea of being a changeling and finding out otherwise seemed to have shattered his world. That was never easy to take.

“He must have traveled far into the forest to find a fairy ring; who knows how long he’s been out.” Edel cast a critical look over him. “I’m sure his parents must be worried sick about him.” She rose, and pulled the unresisting Autor up with her. “I’ll take him home – you two go ahead and relax.”

“Okay…” Ahiru followed Edel as she helped Autor walk back to the house; Fakir lingered a moment longer, but then followed Ahiru. Edel and Autor walked through the kitchen and presumably to the front door and out of the house, but Ahiru stayed in the kitchen, reseating herself at the table. Her tea was still hot, so she sipped it while she mused on what had happened. After a few minutes she looked over at Fakir, who’d sat down as well to finish his tea. “Fakir?”

“Yeah?” He glanced up at her. “What is it?”

“You, um… have you ever seen a fairy ring?” She ran her fingertip around the rim of her teacup. “I’ve been in the forest lots and lots of times by now, but I’ve never seen one… what do they look like? Sorry if that’s a stupid question.” She looked back down, her face warming.

“It’s not. Most people don’t see them for themselves, because they stay well away from where they tend to spring up.” Fakir shook his head. “Everyone here gets warned about them, because they’re dangerous, but most are well beyond the border between our part of the woods and the fairy realm.” He drained his tea and pushed the cup aside, resting his chin on one hand. “They’re rings of mushrooms, growing in a more or less perfect circle… the stories say that to step into them is to invite misfortune, for you will be taken directly into the fairy realm, and the Fair Folk don’t look kindly on trespassers.”

“How scary.” Ahiru shuddered. “Have – have you ever seen one?”

“… Yeah. Twice.” Fakir’s eyes grew distant. “There’s one, only one, that exists on our side of the border, and it’s in a section of the forest that people seldom go in, for good reason. And there’s one just past the border not too far from here – I made the mistake of wandering past it as a child, and nearly strayed into the ring. Fortunately, Charon wasn’t far behind, and stopped me just in time.” He laughed. “He yelled himself hoarse all the way home.”

“Well, I’m glad he stopped you.” Ahiru finished off the last drops of her own tea. “I – I don’t want to think about what could’ve happened to you…”

“Then don’t.” Fakir stood up. “Here, I’ll wash your cup for you if you’re done – you can go relax if you want.”

“O-okay, thanks…” Ahiru handed him her cup and rose as well. “What are you going to do after you’re done?”

“I don’t much feel like a walk anymore, so I think I’ll read in my room till dinner.” Fakir stacked the cups on the counter, and began to heat some water for cleaning. “What about you?”

“I – I think I’m going to go to the library.” Ahiru tugged on her pendant’s chain a little. “If you need me for anything, I’ll be in there reading.”

“All right.” Fakir nodded. “See you later, then.”

“See you!”

Ahiru made a beeline for the library, and once there located all the books she could that had information on fairy rings and the superstitions surrounding them. She then made a small fire in the fireplace, lit a lamp, nestled herself under a blanket in an armchair, and read with interest until dinner time.


	19. Chapter 19

The relatively pleasant weather didn’t last; instead, it seemed that it had been an all too brief reprieve from the worst that March had to offer, and that the foulest portion of it still laid ahead. The skies grew darker and darker over the next week, with scattered showers and ominous rolls of thunder that culminated in the clouds finally bursting open completely as Ahiru and Fakir walked home from their lesson with Mr. Katz on Friday. The lesson itself had been cut short due to the increasing amounts of pain Mr. Katz’ injury was subjecting him to thanks to the worsening weather, and the storm that had been threatening Goldkrone for the past few days hit just after he sent them off with his apologies. They’d worn their cloaks in anticipation of just such an occurrence, though, so they escaped being soaked through and headed immediately to the kitchen upon arriving home to drink tea by the hearth together.

It rained all through the night and into the next day. Ahiru had closed her shutters tightly so the howling winds wouldn’t blow any water in, but the storm was just as loud as it would be if she were standing out in it. As it was she shuddered – soon enough she _would_ be heading out into it, and she dreaded it. Only for a short walk, but still. Her worried gaze fell on the gift that sat on her table; she’d bundled the little wooden box up as securely as possible in cloth that had waterproofing charms sewn into it and she’d keep it inside her cloak _and_ her coat, but it was hard not to worry nevertheless that the rain would somehow make it inside and ruin it. Just the thought was upsetting after how hard she’d worked on it all.

Pushing such thoughts out of her head, Ahiru walked over to her mirror to check her hair one last time before they left. It never looked precisely the way she wanted it to and probably never would no matter what she did, but all the same she couldn’t help giving it another few tries every time. Today she’d arranged it into a braided bun for the occasion; it mostly looked pretty, as much as she could ever think such a thing about anything to do with her appearance, but she still felt vaguely dissatisfied with how messy her bangs always seemed to look and how one part of her hair stubbornly stuck up despite her best efforts to tame it. She made a pouty face at it in the mirror now as she yet again attempted in vain to get it to stay down, and when that failed she tried to fix up her bangs without ruining the rest of her hair.

She was still in the middle of doing that when a knock on the door jolted her out of her frustrated concentration, and she clapped a hand over her mouth to muffle her quack of surprise. “Ahiru? Are you ready to go yet?”

“I - ! Y-yes, s-sorry, Edel!” Ahiru dropped her brush onto her chest of drawers and rushed over to where she’d left the tightly wrapped present. “Am – am I too late?”

“No, but we should definitely get going – it’s not a long walk, but we might as well get it over with during this calmer period.”

Calmer? Ahiru stopped and listened; to her surprise, she realized that the storm had indeed lessened in intensity, at least for now. She knew better than to hope it was over, as there had been a period of relative calm early this morning that had soon enough turned into an even harsher downpour than ever, but as Edel had just said it _was_ the best time to step out into it if one absolutely had to. “Yeah, you’re right – don’t worry, I’m ready now!”

She cast one more anxious look down at her present before retrieving it, and then followed Edel down the hall to the front door, where Fakir was already bundled up and waiting for them. His eyes almost seemed to light up when he saw her – though maybe it was a trick of the lightning that had just flashed outside – but then he frowned. “Ahiru? Is everything all right?”

“No… I mean yes… I mean…” She averted her eyes, her cheeks burning, and concentrated on putting her cloak on. “I guess I’m kind of… well, I… I really hope you like your present…” She swallowed and pulled her hood up so it would hide her face.

“I – I’m sure it’ll be fine.” His cheeks seemed to redden a little too, and he looked away. “Don’t – don’t worry so much. You should have confidence in your work.”

“That’s not really the problem, although I guess it sort of is…” Ahiru wrung her now-gloved hands as she followed the other two out the door. “I mean, I definitely worked hard, but I don’t know if I did a good job, and even if I did, there’s no guarantee you’re going to like it… you know?”

“Yeah, I understand that.” Fakir waited for her to catch up, and then walked beside her as they trailed after Edel. “But I still don’t think you have anything to worry about. Not that that’ll stop you.”

“Bleh.” Ahiru stuck her tongue out at him and then giggled. Fakir laughed too, sending warmth spreading through her despite the knife-like cold of the wind and rain. It felt like the storm was starting to pick up again, and so she increased her pace. “I wonder when this rain is going to stop… I feel sorry for poor Mr. Katz and everyone else like him who gets pain when the weather is like this…”

“Sometime in the middle of the night, I think,” Edel said from ahead of them. “Of course, it could be inaccurate, that sometimes does happen, but it shouldn’t last too much longer, with luck.” Ahiru could tell from her voice that she was frowning. “I’ve done the best I can to protect the garden from the worst of the winds, I only hope it’s been enough.”

“Yeah, I’ve been worried about that too.” Ahiru glanced around at the trees. “And about the birds, too, I hope they’re – ahhh!”

“Ahiru!” Fakir moved swiftly as her foot caught on something in the mud, and caught her in his arms before she could fall backwards onto the ground. “Are you all right? What happened?”

“Y-yeah, I’m…” Ahiru looked up at him, and her heart, already racing from the scare of nearly falling, started beating even faster as she saw how close his face was to hers. There was a drop of rain on his lower lip… and with their cloaks up she could kiss it off without Edel seeing, probably… but that would be weird, and he’d never want her to do that. She shook the idea out of her head. “Th-thanks, it just startled me a little…”

“It’s fine.” He helped her stand up and steady herself before letting go. “Don’t walk so fast next time, idiot – I know you’re eager to get inside, but the ground is more slippery in this weather. You could’ve gotten seriously hurt, especially if there was a rock to knock your head against.”

“I – I know, I’m sorry.” Ahiru hung her head. “But – but I’m really fine, because you were here… so don’t worry.”

“I know you are this time, but I’m…” He paused. “I’m… not always going to be with you to help you. So take better care of yourself and watch out, all right?”

“I will.” Ahiru nodded. “I promise. Don’t worry. A-and sorry.”

“It’s fine.” They started walking again. “I’m just… it’s good that you’re all right now.”

They didn’t have far to go to catch up to Edel, who waited for them at Charon’s door. She nodded as they walked up, and then turned to the door and knocked on it. “I hope he can hear over this downpour,” she remarked, half to herself.

“I can hear you just fine,” Charon said as he pulled the door open, his eyes gleaming with amusement. He grinned at their surprised expressions. “Didn’t think I’d answer so quickly? Well, no need to get alarmed and think I’ve suddenly developed clairvoyance – it was just a coincidence.”

“How nice,” Edel said in her driest tone. “May we come in, then? Or do you intend to have us wait in the rain a little longer to compensate for your coincidental speediness in opening the door?”

“Fine, fine.” Charon stood aside, holding the door open so they could all troop in out of the rain. “Rush your host, that’s wonderful manners on the part of a guest. Yes indeed.”

“One of your guests is your son, having his birthday today.” Edel took her wet cloak off and hung it up beside someone else’s in the area by the front door reserved for such things. “Shouldn’t you be trying to accommodate him?”

“Sure, of course I am.” Charon closed the door behind them. “And Ahiru here too, naturally. Maybe a little less for you, seeing as you’re starting off the party with your customary indecorous…ness.” He winced.

“Merely a response to a negligent host.” Edel shrugged. “But I’ll let it slide, seeing as we’re inside now.”

“Oh, now, are you two at it again?” Raetsel appeared, seemingly having come from the kitchen; she had a smile on her face, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Sometimes you two sound like an old married couple.”

“Me? Marry _her?_ ” Charon scratched his head, looking perplexed. “Bite your tongue, Raetsel – I’d sooner remain a bachelor all my days than wed Edel.”

“H-hey, that’s not very nice,” Ahiru protested, feeling somehow insulted on Edel’s behalf. “Edel’s not mean, she’s so nice, a-and pretty, and talented at witchcraft… she’d be good for anybody!”

“Oh, Ahiru, it’s fine.” Edel patted her shoulder. “He’s just teasing, the way I tease him. We’ve always been like this… surely you must’ve noticed before? We merely give each other a hard time without any sting in it. It’s how we have fun with each other.”

“It’s true.” Raetsel wrapped her shawl a little tighter around her shoulders. “They’ve been that way for as long as I can remember.” She glanced at Edel, and then at Charon. “You do have to admit that it sounds like flirting, sometimes.”

“Maybe.” Edel shrugged. “It’s nothing of the sort, though, just two friends bantering.”

“That’s what they all say.” Raetsel winked and laughed, though something about it didn’t ring true to Ahiru’s ears. “Anyway, Charon, I’ve got the special treat going, it’ll take a few minutes still to finish properly heating up.”

“That’s fine. Thanks, Raetsel.” He smiled, and she let her gaze drop as she re-tied her shawl. “Would you mind showing them to the sitting room while I keep an eye on things in the kitchen? Oh, and take the cake with you too.”

“Certainly.” Raetsel headed back into the kitchen, and a minute or so later reappeared with a tray that held plates, cutlery, and a large, tantalizingly-scented bienenstich cake. Ahiru’s mouth watered a little at the sight of it. “This way, we’ll wait for Charon while he gets the surprise ready.” She led them into the sitting room, where Ahiru and Edel left their gifts on the table by the window before sitting down. “Shouldn’t take too long, and then we can cut into this cake.”

“It looks really delicious.” Ahiru’s stomach suddenly felt empty just seeing and smelling it. “Did you make it?”

“I did indeed.” Raetsel smiled as she set the tray down on the sitting room table. Ahiru recalled how she’d had too much to drink in here on Yule, and blushed at the memory. “Used my very own honey for the topping, of course.” She sat down in the middle of the sofa opposite Ahiru and Fakir, right next to Edel, and smoothed down her skirts. “I hope you enjoy it – I’m not good enough to open my own bakery, of course, but I do have some meager skill. My mother says it’ll serve me well when I get married.”

“I’m sure it’s really good!” Ahiru swung her legs a little. “It _smells_ really good, and it’s so pretty… I can’t see how it would taste bad.”

“You might be surprised at how deceptive such things can be, even with food.” Raetsel laughed. “I’ve certainly had my share of disasters in the kitchen, and not all of them were readily apparent as such until I – or some unfortunate test subject – took a bite. By which point it was too late to fix anything.” She frowned. “But enough about me, I’m being rude. Fakir – ” She turned her attention to him. “Happy birthday, and how are you? How is life treating you? Tell me everything.”

“I – thanks.” Fakir paused. “And… I’m fine. There’s really not much to tell.” He shrugged. “I keep busy at the forge, I get the literature tutoring I told you about… nothing has changed since the last time we spoke.”

“So you’re no closer to deciding what you want as your new permanent career?” Raetsel raised an eyebrow. “Not that I’m rushing you or anything, just… it’s always good to closely examine your future, and I’m surprised that you, of all people, haven’t picked anything out yet. You were so _set_ on being a knight when you were so young.”

“That’s part of the problem. It’s hard to easily find a replacement for something that you’d thought was permanent.” He shrugged again, and Ahiru thought his shoulders looked a little stiffer than they had a moment ago. Not, of course, that she paid close attention to _any_ part of his body, she told herself; it was just some of her medical training kicking in. “I’m fine. I just… I just need more time.” He paused. “I’ll… just don’t worry, all right?”

“Oh, well, that’s true…” Raetsel’s gaze became distant for a moment. “Yes, it can be hard to let go of old dreams and find new ones, I understand.” She gave him a sympathetic look. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to pry or push you, I just… I worry, is all. It’s the way I am, I’m afraid.” She laughed.

“I know.” Fakir shifted slightly. “But I really am fine. The work here is good, and I enjoy learning about literature, and I’m in a comfortable home that I like living in… I’m in no rush to figure out a new career.”

“I can see that.” Raetsel nodded. “You’re young yet, there’s plenty of time… you’ve got your whole life to figure things out, there’s no need to hurry, especially after such an upheaval as what happened last year. As I said, I don’t mean to rush you – I just want to be sure you’re happy, most of all. That’s the most important thing, in the end.”

“I am.” Was it her imagination, or did Fakir glance briefly in her direction? He must have been recalling the similar conversation they’d had while riding together on New Year’s. “Don’t worry about that.”

“All right, I’ll try not to, though you know me.” Raetsel laughed again, and then turned to Ahiru. “How about you, Ahiru – how’s life treating you? How’s _Fakir_ treating you? Better than at the Harvest Festival, I hope.”

“I… well, he wasn’t really being _mean_ back then, not really, but…” Ahiru could feel a flush creeping into her cheeks at the memory. “He – he’s really good to me, don’t worry, we’re really good friends… we don’t always agree on everything, but that’s normal, a-and we get along really well, and I… well, just – just don’t worry, okay?”

“That’s good to hear.” Her eyes seemed to gleam a little as she glanced at Fakir again, and then she shifted her attention back to Ahiru. “And otherwise? What about your witchcraft lessons, how are those going? I know already that I don’t need to worry about Edel treating you badly, unlike this grouch over here, but how’s the work itself?”

“It – it’s good.” Ahiru tried not to bristle at the comment about Fakir, reminding herself that he _had_ been rude to her when they’d first met, there was no denying that. She felt protective of him all the same, though; he was grumpy a lot, sure, and not good at expressing feelings, but she knew he had them and how kind he was underneath it all, so it nettled her a bit to hear such remarks. “I’m still learning how to brew and blend and even cook stuff, but I’m also doing divination, I’m doing horoscopes right now and they’re really fun.”

“Oh, I do love astrology.” Raetsel’s eyes took on a faraway look. “I don’t know if you read Goldkrone’s newspaper, but they employ the most _amazing_ astrologer, I check her horoscopes every day and they’re such good guiding tools. Of course, if one wants something longer-term or more specialized you have to make an appointment with someone.” She sighed. “And I just can’t seem to find the time lately, and when I do, I can’t get in. And no one works on Sunday, which is the only day I ever truly have completely free. It’s _such_ a nuisance.”

“I could always do some sort of reading for you,” Edel said. “Free of charge, because we’re friends, and I wouldn’t mind seeing you on a Sunday.”

“Oh, no, I couldn’t ask you to do something like that.” Raetsel shook her head. “It wouldn’t be right of me to intrude upon your free time, and certainly not without paying. Even friends shouldn’t take advantage of each other like that.”

“You wouldn’t be taking advantage of me. Don’t be ridiculous.” Edel smoothed some of her hair down. “I want to do it for you, as a favor – I know how busy you are with your bees and running your market stall, and it isn’t in my nature to turn away anyone who needs my help. If you don’t want it, that’s one thing, but don’t turn it down because you think you’d be doing wrong by me. You really wouldn’t.”

“It – it isn’t that, I just…” Raetsel rubbed the fringe of her shawl between her fingers, and stared down at her lap. “It’s that I… I’m not… oh, I don’t know how to put it in words… I just…” She pursed her lips.

“Would you feel more comfortable paying me with a jar of honey, or something like that?” Edel asked. “I’d gladly accept that if it would make you feel better. And you don’t have to reveal anything too personal about your life if that’s what’s troubling you. I only need to know what type of reading you want – nothing more. Details aren’t necessary.”

“They aren’t?” Raetsel seemed to sag with relief. “Then… then yes, I’d love to get a reading, as well as consult you on… well, we’ll talk about it when it happens.” She straightened her shawl. “How soon can you see me? I understand if tomorrow is too sudden, so if another day is better I can stop by then.”

“Tomorrow is fine.” Edel shrugged. “You can stop by any time you like, as long as it’s not too early or late in the day.”

“Oh, never, never.” Raetsel shook her head. “Then, depending on the weather, I’ll come by either tomorrow morning or afternoon. Does that work?”

“Yes.” Edel nodded. “I’ll know to expect you, so I’ll plan my activities accordingly.”

“I hate to think of you basing your whole day around me, but all right.” Raetsel sighed, and then brightened. “Oh, but thank you so much, Edel – I do so need guidance in an urgent matter, and I haven’t been able to find it anywhere. You’re the best, truly.”

“Best save such praise until after you’ve learned if I can help you or not.” Edel laughed. “But I’ll thank you for the compliment all the same.”

“Oh now, what’s this?” Charon laughed as he entered the room, carrying a second tray much like the one Raetsel had brought in. This one, however, had a silver pot on it, and five cups. “Don’t go inflating her head, Raetsel – it’s the last thing she needs.”

“Oh, don’t start that again.” Raetsel rolled her eyes. “You mustn’t spoil Fakir’s birthday with your tiresome antics.”

“It doesn’t bother me.” Fakir shrugged. “I’m used to them poking at each other like this.”

“That’s not the point, I just…” Raetsel sighed again. “I suppose I would rather that you get to hear pleasant conversation, and the focus really ought to be on you at this moment, anyway.”

“But I…” Fakir shifted in his seat again. Ahiru knew he didn’t like being the center of attention at all, and she could tell that he was trying to find a tactful way to say that.

“She’s got a point. Sorry for starting to stir it up.” Charon set the tray down. “Raetsel, if you could cut the cake while I pour this, I’d be much obliged.”

“Of course.” Raetsel smiled at him, and then picked up the knife so that she could begin serving everyone cake, starting with Fakir.

“What is that?” Ahiru leaned closer and peered at the silver pot. “I can’t really smell anything…”

“Ah, that’s because I haven’t poured it yet.” Charon picked up the pot, and pressed something on the handle so that the spout clicked open. The scent of melted chocolate hit them immediately, and Ahiru let out a little gasp. “Yes, indeed – hot chocolate. Raetsel was kind enough to bring over her chocolate pot for this special occasion, and I think it’ll go nicely with the cake she made.” He began to pour it into the cups, and Ahiru felt her stomach growl.

“As though I wouldn’t pitch in.” Raetsel held out a piece of cake to Charon, and he took it from her once he’d handed Edel her hot chocolate. Their hands brushed slightly as they exchanged cup and plate, and Ahiru thought she saw Raetsel blush a little. It was hard to tell.

“A  toast, before we dig into this excellent food.” Charon raised his cup. “To Fakir, on his twenty-second birthday – and to many, many more years to come!”

They all clinked their cups together and took sips of the chocolate; Fakir was the first to speak once he’d swallowed his down. “Thank you.” He glanced down at his slice of cake. “You didn’t have to do all this for me, but I appreciate it.”

“Nonsense.” Charon held his hand in front of his mouth so that he wouldn’t spray crumbs on anyone, as he’d inelegantly chosen to speak with his mouth full. “It’s…” He swallowed down the cake. “Your birthday only comes once a year, and you’re my only son… why would I not celebrate it with you? Likewise, I think, for the others… we’re your family, your…” He took another sip of chocolate. “Friends. Of course we want to share a special day with you.”

“I wouldn’t miss this for the world.” Raetsel delicately speared a perfectly-cut square of cake and ate it. “Don’t be ridiculous, Fakir – unless you don’t actually _want_ to spend time with us?” She raised an eyebrow, looking amused.

“That – that’s not what I _said_ …” His face a little red, Fakir looked down at his dessert; he picked a candied almond slice off his cake and ate it, and then took a large hunk with his fork and put it in his mouth. Well. That would stop him having to answer questions for at least a minute, Ahiru thought, unless he’d picked up Charon’s  bad habit of talking with food in his mouth.

“Let him be,” Edel said. She took a drink of chocolate. “No one likes to be teased on their birthday, and I don’t think Fakir likes to be teased at all, so give him a reprieve at least for today.”

“Fine, fine.” Raetsel laughed. “I’ll change the subject.” She glanced around at all of them. “In truth, I am curious – how did the cake come out? I haven’t made this one in a while, and I tried out a different honey, so I’d like to hear how it is.”

“It’s really delicious!” Ahiru scooped a fallen piece of almond onto her fork with more cake. “I – I don’t know how it tastes when you make it with whatever other honey you normally use, but this tastes so good, I love it…”

“I’m a fan of this variation as well.” Edel took a bite and chewed it, and nodded as she swallowed. “There is nothing wrong with the honey you usually use, of course, but this gives it a more delicate flavor that marries well with the almonds.”

“It’s really good.” Fakir had swallowed the overlarge hunk of cake by now. “I like it.”

“You know me.” Charon covered his mouth to muffle a burp. “I’m not picky. I like whatever baked good you bring over, and this is no exception.”

“Really?” Raetsel’s face lit up. “Oh, thank you, everyone – I’m so relieved it came out all right.” Her eyes lingered on Charon for a moment, and then she resumed eating and drinking her chocolate.

“More than all right, it’s great!” Ahiru gulped down her hot chocolate. “And the chocolate is really good too! This is all really, really good.”

“I’m glad.” Raetsel smiled. “I really did want it to be a special treat for Fakir’s birthday, and for you all to enjoy it as well. I’m glad you can be here to celebrate too, Ahiru – it’s always nice to see you, and I’m so happy that you two have become friends.”

“M-me too.” Ahiru blushed and looked down at her plate. She’d already eaten most of her cake, and only a tiny nibble still remained, along with some stray crumbs. She pushed it around the plate with her fork a little. “O-on both counts, that is…” She put the cake in her mouth and tried to savor this last bite.

“Don’t worry, you three can take some slices home,” Raetsel said with a laugh, as if she’d read Ahiru’s mind.

“Really?” Ahiru looked up at her with wide eyes. “You’re sure? It’s really okay?”

“Of course! I’m flattered that you’d want more.” She smiled. “I felt so worried bringing it over, but now, seeing these empty plates so soon, well… I feel a lot better.” She set her plate and fork down, and drained the last of her hot chocolate. “So… I suppose the birthday guest will be wanting to open his presents now that we’ve all cleaned our plates, am I right?”

“Yeah.” Fakir set his now-empty cup down. “That’s fine with me.”

“So enthusias – oh wait, I’m not supposed to tease you.” Raetsel winked. “Silly boy. Or should I say man? I think you’re well past boyhood now.” She stood up, and gave Fakir a considering look that made Ahiru’s stomach squirm a little. Was she looking him over? Did she… did have feelings for him? She couldn’t tell. “Then again, you’ll always be my little brother, so I suppose it’s hard for me to see you as being as grown-up as I am.” She brushed past Charon and moved to where they’d all left their gifts. “Anyway, I’ll bring these over for you, so stay seated.”

“All right.” Fakir leaned back on the sofa, and Ahiru unconsciously mirrored him. “Thanks.”

“Not at all.” She deposited three boxes by him, and then returned to sitting between Charon and Edel. “Charon, yours is – not ready, is that what you said?”

“No, it isn’t.” He scratched the back of his head. “Well – to be more clear, that’s not what I said.” He looked over at Fakir. “Your gift from me is in the stables; I’ll go ahead and tell you what it is.” He shifted in his seat. “I noticed that Asim’s saddle was getting a bit worn out, and I know how you are about replacing things, so I bought you a new one, and I had every intention of taking you out there to show you. Maybe you’d even have gotten to take it for a test ride. But…” He laughed. “The weather turned sour, so you’ll have to wait on that. Sorry.”

“It’s fine.” Fakir sat up straighter and picked up a box, and Ahiru sat up as well so she could better watch him open it. “And thanks. I did need a better one, and that saves me the trouble of going and buying it myself.”

Charon chuckled. “Yes, I thought you’d appreciate that.”

“I’ll probably test it out once the weather clears up.” Fakir took the protective cloth off the box, and opened up the lid. The faint smell of honey drifted up from the contents, which glistened gold in the light. “Candy?”

“Yes, some of my special honey candies.” Raetsel adjusted her shawl. “I know you still have a sweet tooth, and you always did like it when I made these, so I whipped a large batch just for you. Although that doesn’t mean you can’t share them, if you’d like.” She winked.

“Thanks.” Fakir replaced the lid and set it aside. “I’ll enjoy those.” He picked up the next box; taking off the cloth and lid revealed a large, squat round jar and a square tin. “Who’s this from?”

“That’s mine,” Edel said. “Some lotion for your hands – especially that injured one, it will soothe the pains you said you get in it sometimes. And some fresh tea designed to help you relax at the end of a hard day.”

“Thank you.” Fakir picked up the tin and took off the lid so he could sniff the tea. “These will really come in handy.” He put the lid back on and set the tin back in the box before putting it alongside Raetsel’s.

“Good to know.” Edel settled herself back in the sofa and smoothed her gown’s skirt. “I know it isn’t, perhaps, the most fun gift, but it’s practical and will serve you well, and I know you’ve never minded receiving practical things as presents.”

“Yeah, practical gifts are good.” He reached for the last one, and Ahiru’s pulse quickened. She swallowed hard as she watched him undo the protective cloth and take the top off the lid. Inside sat three small bundles tied with ribbons; Fakir took hold of the largest first, and carefully untied the little bow Ahiru had made. The cloth then fell aside to reveal a crisp white handkerchief, embellished with elaborate green and brown embroidery along the edges.

“Do – do you like it?” Ahiru peered anxiously at him. “You were so nice to give me that one that day when I didn’t have mine, and you never asked for it back, so… so I thought maybe I’d make you a new one, and Edel said you liked practical stuff, so…” She twisted her hands in her lap. “Is it okay?”

“Of course it is.” Fakir nodded. “Thank you – it’s… very thoughtful of you.” He unfolded it so he could better look at the embroidery she’d added to it. “You did this yourself?”

“Yes!” Ahiru leaned over to better look at it. “That’s one of the things I _did_ learn back in the city, how to do that… so I got some cloth, and I fixed it up, and did the embroidery so it wouldn’t be so plain… you don’t mind, do you?”

“Why would I mind? Besides, you did a good job.” He refolded it and laid it back in the box. “Thank you.”

“Y-you’re welcome!” She watched as he undid the ribbon around the second little bundle and uncovered a slim bookmark. “I – I made that too… I thought it would be good for using for all your fun books, or the books from Mr. Katz, not that those aren’t fun too but you know what I mean… b-but anyway, I did the painting on it myself, and added the ribbon so it’d be easy to see in the book…”

“They’re both lovely, Ahiru.” Raetsel smiled as Ahiru looked up at the sound of her voice. “You’re very creative and talented.”

“Not – not really.” Ahiru blushed again and glanced away. “I just… I learned how to do a few things and I guess I’m okay at them… so I tried to do my best for Fakir’s presents cause I like giving people stuff I made myself… some people like store-bought things better but I figured Fakir might like homemade gifts more…”

“I do, yes.” Fakir nodded at her and set the bookmark down beside the handkerchief. “Thanks, I’ll definitely get good use out of this too.” He opened up the final bundle to find some paper inside; he carefully unfolded it and peered at the writing on it. “Oh… this is…”

“A horoscope!” Ahiru clapped her hands together. “I learned how to do birthday horoscopes that kind of give you a general idea of what the next year of your life is going to be like, so I wanted to do one as a special treat for you. Is that okay too?”

“… Yeah.” Fakir folded it back up and put it in the box with the other items. “I’ll read it later. Thanks for all these, Ahiru.” He gave her a small smile that made her feel like they were the only two in the room. “See? You didn’t have to worry after all.”

“I! W-well, I’m glad…” Ahiru fought the urge to hide her face, especially as it felt hot all over again, and settled for giving Fakir an embarrassed smile of her own. “I’m really glad you liked them all… I was hoping you would, and I worked extra hard cause you should get special stuff on your birthday, like Charon said it only happens once a year, so… so yeah.”

“I appreciate it.” He smiled at her again, and then glanced at the other three, his expression becoming more serious. “What now?”

“That’s up to you.” Charon shrugged. “And Edel and Ahiru too – did you want to stay for dinner, or head home?” He looked over at Raetsel. “And what about you? You have a longer walk home, did you want to have a bite to eat before you go, or would you prefer to just head out?”

“As much fun as I’ve had, I suppose I better get going.” Raetsel sighed. “I do have a long walk back, you’re right, and even if you _did_ have an extra room it’d be a bit scandalous to ask to stay over.” She laughed.

Charon shook his head and chuckled. “Raetsel, didn’t anyone ever tell you it’s impolite to tease adults?”

“I suppose my parents might have, but what relevance does it have on my life now?” Her voice seemed to gain a slight edge. “I’m just as much of an adult as you are.”

“Your elders, then.” He stood up, and began gathering the cups back onto the tray, along with the chocolate pot. “Do you want this thing back now? I can clean it for you, or you can take it home… doesn’t matter to me.”

“I…” Raetsel considered it. “Hmmm… would you… mind washing it for me tomorrow? I’ll pick it up when I leave Edel’s house after the consultation.”

“Sure.” He set the last cup onto the tray. “Like I said, it doesn’t matter to me. I don’t mind washing it up, not after you were so kind to bring it over.” He looked over at the other three. “What about you?”

“I don’t know what Ahiru and Fakir want, but I do think I should point something out.” Edel moved her plate and fork onto the other tray. “Raetsel, there are plenty of spare rooms at my house if you don’t want to walk all the way back. There’s no need to put yourself through that if you’d rather not.”

“Oh no, Edel, thank you, but I’m fine.” Raetsel shook her head. “I appreciate the offer, it’s very kind of you, but I don’t think it’s a good idea. I told my parents I’d be home tonight, you see, and they’ll worry themselves sick if I don’t keep my promise. Since there’s no way of getting a message to them that I’d be staying in your house, it’s best if I brave the storm.” She paused, listening. “And it does appear to be waning, so it probably won’t be so bad.”

“True.” Edel gathered the other plates and forks onto the tray and picked it up just as Charon lifted the other one. “Best not to let your parents worry, you’re right. Still, you should know that the offer is always open, and that next time you can simply tell your parents that you’ll be staying at my home for the night instead of walking home in the dark and the rain.”

“I will next time, thank you.” Raetsel stood up as Charon and Edel did. “What about you two? Staying behind for some dinner?”

“I think I’ll head home, actually.” Fakir stood up too. “If that’s all right. If the storm’s going to pick up again I’d rather be inside, and I want to make the walk, however short, before it gets much darker.”

“I understand.” Charon nodded at him. “Don’t blame you.”

“Yeah, that sounds good to me too.” Ahiru rose, and adjusted her dress. “I – I’ll help you pack up your presents, if you want…”

“Yeah, thanks.” Fakir stacked the boxes on the sofa, and Ahiru helped him pack everything securely while Charon and Edel headed to the kitchen with the trays, Raetsel trailing behind and chattering to them. Once they’d done that they put them in the basket Edel had brought over, and draped another sheet of water-repelling cloth over them all.

“Are you okay carrying them?” Ahiru asked as he walked to the front door. “If it’s too heavy, I can carry one of them myself…”

“I’m fine.” His lips twitched into a wry smile. “I think I’m strong enough to manage.”

“Well… okay… yeah… you _are_ really strong…” Ahiru felt her face warm up as she remembered being pressed up against him while riding, and the feel of his arms around her those times he’d caught and held her. “I just… want to help you out if I can, you know?”

“… I do know, yeah.” His smile became a fond one, rather than amused. “Thanks… I know you mean well, and I appreciate it.”

“Of course.” Ahiru beamed up at him. Fakir smiled back, and then set the basket on the table near the front door. Their cloaks had nearly dried completely now, with only a few damp spots on the outside, so he retrieved them from their pegs and handed Ahiru hers. Her breath caught when their hands brushed, as it always did, and she focused rather intently on putting the cloak on so as to hide her deepening blush. Would he ever stop having this effect on her? She was beginning to think it would never end, and she didn’t know if she minded that or not.

“Ready to leave, are you?” Edel walked up behind Ahiru, a carefully wrapped package in her hand that was probably some of the cake, and took her own cloak and gloves down. “I see you wasted no time.”

“Maybe they were hoping to sneak off together,” Raetsel said, and her laugh sounded more like a mischievous giggle. “A rendezvous in the rain, perhaps?”

Fakir turned bright red and opened his mouth to say something, but Charon beat him to it. “Now, now, Raetsel, what were you told about teasing him on his birthday, eh?” He brushed past her and Edel and walked over to Fakir. “Happy birthday, Fakir – I hope it’s been a good one, and that the year to come is even better.” He embraced him.

“I… thanks.” Fakir returned the hug, and Ahiru couldn’t help but notice, again, the difference in their heights. Not surprising, since they weren’t biologically related, but there was a definite contrast between them even if you only took height and build into account. “I’ll… try to make it a good one.” Something sounded strange, strained almost, about his voice.

“I know you will.” Charon let go of him and stepped back. “You’re a good man, and I’m proud of you.” He clapped Fakir on the shoulder. “Take care, all right? I know it’s a short walk, but in this weather even a few feet can present a danger, especially in the woods.”

“Don’t worry.” Fakir shook his head. “I’m always careful.”

“Good.” Charon opened the door, and held it open. “That goes for you ladies too, all right? I’d hate to see any of you get hurt either.”

“I will!” Ahiru nodded. “Goodnight, Charon, and thanks for everything!”

“Yes, thank you for having us, and for your concern.” Raetsel patted his arm as she walked by. “I’ll see you tomorrow when I pick up the chocolate pot – and you as well, Edel, Fakir, Ahiru.” She smiled. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight!” Ahiru waved at her, as did the others. She turned her head and waved back at them, and then proceeded up the path.

“Anything more I can send home with you?” Charon asked as they walked past him and out the door. “I see you’ve got your cake, the presents… you don’t need anything else?”

“I’m quite fine, thank you.” Edel adjusted her hood. “I appreciate the offer.”

“Yeah, I’m fine too.” Fakir made sure his cloak was covering the basket, just in case. “I’ll come by as soon as the weather clears up to see the saddle, maybe take Asim out for some exercise.”

“Good idea, I think he might be getting a little cabin fever.” Charon chuckled. “And you, Ahiru? Nothing you need?”

“No thank you.” Ahiru shook her head. “Goodnight, and thanks again for having us over!”

“My pleasure. Goodnight to you all.”

He waved to them one last time, and then shut the door. Edel led the way back down the path towards home, with Fakir and Ahiru following together.

“Are you happy with all your presents?” Ahiru asked him halfway between the two houses. Above them, rain dripped from leaves down onto their heads.

“Yeah.” Fakir ducked under a branch. “And I was…” He paused. “Would you… when I take Asim for a ride, do you want to come along? To make sure the saddle’s comfortable for you too, you know.”

“Oh, I’d love that!” Ahiru brightened. “That sounds really fun!”

“All right.” Fakir smiled. “As soon as the weather’s clear and we’re both able, we’ll go and do that.”

Once inside the house they all parted and went their separate ways, more or less, after hanging up their wet things. Edel said she needed to soak the chill out of her bones with a bath, so she headed to her room. Ahiru took the cake to the kitchen for her, and put water on for some tisane while she fetched a book from her room. She didn’t actually end up reading it, however, because after putting away his other gifts Fakir decided to stay and have some herbal tea with her, and they talked for a while over it. Edel eventually joined them, and by that time all three were hungry again for a small meal. They ate together, cleaned up, and then each went back to their own rooms. Ahiru drew a hot bath of her own, adding lavender tincture to it, and read some of her book until the water grew lukewarm. She fell into a dreamless sleep once ensconced in bed, carried off by the lullaby of the now gentle and steady dripping of the rain on her roof.

She awoke on Sunday morning to sunlight and the sound of birds. The storm had passed during the night, the clouds clearing up by dawn and revealing a pure blue sky that looked almost achingly beautiful as Ahiru opened her shutters and gazed up at it through her window. On the other side of the screen the birds chirped merrily at her between bites of seed (she’d cautiously set some out the night before, while waiting for her bath water to heat, seeing as the storm had quieted considerably and the wind had died down). She smiled and chatted to them before getting up and readying herself for the day.

About halfway through her morning routine Ahiru remembered about the plans to go riding with Fakir as soon as the weather cleared up, and as a result practically bounced into the kitchen. If he didn’t have any pressing obligations and thought it safe to do so today, why, they could be out on Asim in a matter of _hours!_ Maybe not even that, depending on how long they took to get ready. It sent a thrill through her and she almost crossed her fingers behind her back for luck as she all but skipped in through the door.

Fakir looked up from the newspaper he’d been skimming over as she walked to her chair, and his mouth curved in a small smile as he saw her expression. “Hey. Morning.” Over at the stove, Edel had tea brewing and was stirring some hot cereal.

“Good morning, Fakir!” Ahiru sat down in her usual chair across from him, and barely restrained herself from swinging her legs back and forth. “So, uh… the storm really cleared up, didn’t it? It’s so sunny now…”

“Yeah.” The paper rustled as Fakir turned a page. “Almost looks like there wasn’t a storm at all.”

“It doesn’t! It’s kind of amazing.” Now she did swing her legs, just a little; not enough to brush her feet against Fakir’s legs, but enough to let out some of her pent-up energy and excitement. “And it should dry up all the mud soon enough, so it won’t be too bad to walk in either…”

“Are you thinking of taking a walk?” Fakir closed the paper and set it aside as Edel brought over a steaming cup of tea and bowl of cereal for him.

“Maybe.” Ahiru wiggled her toes inside her shoes, and waited for Fakir to be done with the jar of honey before spooning some into her own cup. “What are _you_ going to do? Do you have any plans? It’s nice enough that you could go outside and do stuff, if you wanted…”

“I’m not sure.” Fakir stacked some ham and cheese onto a slice of bread, and spread butter and jam on another. “I was thinking of maybe taking Asim for that ride, if you wanted to go… but if you have something else you’d rather do, we can wait for another time. You don’t have to right now, obviously.”

“But I do want to!” Jam dripped from Ahiru’s knife mid-spreading, and she ignored it. “I really do! If – if you do too, that is… I – I don’t want to pressure you or anything, especially if you think it isn’t safe.”

“It should be fine.” Fakir took a sip of tea. “As long as it’s a brief, slow ride there shouldn’t be any problems, and as this is merely to test the comfort of the new saddle for you, that’s all I ever intended it to be anyway. Once we know it’s a good saddle for both of us we’re free to go on a longer ride when the ground is drier.”

“Okay!” Ahiru nearly bounced up and down in her seat, but stopped herself. “We’ll go after breakfast, then?”

Fakir nodded. “Sounds good.”

True to their plan, they finished breakfast and then hurried off to get ready for a ride. Ahiru, thinking ahead, had already put on a dress where a muddied hem wouldn’t be a problem to clean, and fumbled over putting on the riding boots she’d bought last month, so eager was she. At the front door she and Fakir donned their cloaks and gloves, and headed out for the short walk to the stables at Charon’s house.

When they got there they found the new saddle hanging where Fakir had previously kept the old one. Fakir made a low noise of approval as he saw it – it had been made of plain brown leather, without any fancy embellishments or designs, clearly designed solely for work rather than looks. “Seems good. He knows my preferences.” Fakir lifted the saddle off its hook and closely examined it. “I’ll get Asim ready and saddle him up, and then we’ll go. All right?”

“Okay, sounds good!” Ahiru nodded. She stepped back and gave Fakir room to do what he needed to do, and then followed him out of the stable once Asim was saddled up. They were in the habit now of foregoing using a stool for her to climb on with – since it usually wasn’t in the stable anyway – and used to Fakir helping her up instead. Or at least maybe _he_ was used to it; she didn’t know if _she’d_ ever be completely accustomed to how it felt to have his hands around her waist like that, or to the feeling of him pressed up against her as they rode. If she was honest, that was probably her favorite part of riding, and some of her motivation for learning how. Not that she’d ever admit it to _him_.

They rode for about twenty minutes, on flat and even terrain that had already partially dried up in the morning sunlight. Fakir had Asim walk slowly and carefully, so as to avoid slipping in what mud still remained, and kept a close eye on his condition so he didn’t become overtired. At the end of the time he’d allotted for their ride he guided Asim back to the stable, where he cooled him down and brushed him after removing the saddle, and gave him fresh water and oats before they left.

“So that was comfortable enough for you?” Fakir asked as they walked back home. “You’re not sore or in pain?”

“Nope!” Ahiru shook her head. “It felt weird at first, cause it was brand new and I had to get used to it, but I definitely got used to it by the end and it wasn’t painful at all. I feel fine now!” She swung her arms back and forth as she walked. Something about riding with Fakir always made her feel bordering on euphoric afterwards – just so contented and happy and _good_ , both physically and mentally. “Thanks for asking me to come with, it was really really nice of you to think of me and how comfortable the new saddle would be for me.”

“Of course.” Fakir brushed some hair out of his eyes. “As I said, you’re going to be continuing to ride with me, so it makes sense that I’d want to know if it’s comfortable for you. And if it _had_ proved to be bad for you I’d rather know now, so that I could get a new one before this one is very used.”

“Yeah, that’s true.” Ahiru nodded. “But still, I’m glad you thought of me.” She smiled up at him.

“I… I just… like I said, it just makes the most sense.” Fakir turned a little red, and proceeded to busy himself with unlocking and opening the front door for her. Ahiru all but sailed in, still in her excellent mood from a ride with him.

She hung up her cloak and scraped the mud from her boots, as did he, and then went back to her bedroom. Her dress hadn’t gotten muddied, which was nice, so all she had to do was change out of the boots and into shoes more suitable for being at home. She’d just sat down on her bed to try and figure out what to do with the rest of the day when Edel knocked on her door. “Ahiru? Can I come in?”

“Yeah, go ahead!” Ahiru smoothed her skirt down. “What is it?”

Edel opened the door and stepped in. “It isn’t anything big, don’t worry… but the thing is, Raetsel hasn’t come by yet, and I was wondering if you wanted to sit in on the consultation I’m going to do for her. It would be a good learning experience for you, as you may get asked to do one yourself someday. You don’t have to, of course, but I didn’t want to proceed without asking you.”

“Oh no, I’d love to!” Ahiru clapped her hands together. “That – that sounds really interesting, cause I love all the astrology stuff and there’s still things I have to learn about horoscopes and, and… yeah. Like you said, it’s important for me to learn in case I have to do one someday.”

“All right.” Edel nodded. “Given the hour, she’ll probably stop by after lunch; we’ll do the consultation in the sitting room.”

“Okay.” Ahiru nodded.

Ahiru spent the rest of the morning reading up on astrology in her textbook; she reviewed everything she’d learnt so far and went over all the horoscopes and star charts she’d done. She wasn’t sure exactly what kind of consultation Raetsel wanted, what sort of prediction or guidance she had in mind or if it had even been covered in her education up to this point, but it didn’t hurt to refresh herself.

The door bell rang just as Ahiru, Edel, and Fakir were almost done putting the freshly cleaned dishes and cutlery away after lunch. “That’ll be Raetsel.” Edel set down the cup she’d been drying. “Fakir, do you mind taking over on the rest of this? Ahiru and I are going to do her consultation.”

“Not at all.” Fakir took the towel from her, and finished drying the cup. “Go on, I can handle the rest.”

“Thank you.” She nodded to him, as did Ahiru, and then the two hurried away to the front door.

“Hello, Edel.” Raetsel smiled. “And…” Her gaze strayed down to Ahiru. “Ahiru? You’re going to sit in on this?”

“Would you prefer if she didn’t?” Edel asked as she stepped aside so Raetsel could come in. “I felt it would be beneficial to her education and she will of course keep any secrets you may reveal, but if it makes you uncomfortable to have her there I will abide by your wishes.”

“Oh no, I don’t mind at all.” Raetsel set the basket she’d been carrying on the table so that she could remove her cloak and hang it up. “The more the merrier, I think.” She laughed. “And because I wouldn’t feel right otherwise I _did_ bring payment of a sort, like I said I would.” She picked up the basket.

“Why don’t you show us in the sitting room, where it’s more comfortable?” Edel said, before Raetsel could pull the cloth back and show them the basket’s contents. “You’ve had a lengthy walk here, do come and rest your feet. I’ve a nice fire going in there as well.”

“Oh, that does sound heavenly,” Raetsel admitted as she followed Edel and Ahiru towards the sitting room. “I could use the rest, definitely.”

“What of tea?” Edel held the door open for the other two. “I could put some on if you’re so inclined.”

“No thank you, I’m fine.” Raetsel settled herself down onto the sofa, while Ahiru sank into an armchair. “And as for what I brought…” She set the cloth that covered the basket aside, and held out a jar as Edel sat down in another armchair. “Some honey! Three, in fact – one jar of regular, and two infusions.”

“That’s very kind of you.” Edel smiled. “You didn’t have to bring payment of any sort, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t appreciated all the same. Thank you.”

“Of course, of course.” Raetsel put the jar back in the basket, which she set on the table that rested in front of her. “And ah, that fire does feel nice… as does sitting down. I really ought to visit more often, you have as lovely a home as ever, and I should like to see more of Ahiru and Fakir. And you too, of course!”

“I would enjoy that. Now…” Edel leaned forward slightly. “What sort of consultation are you hoping for? A horoscope of some kind? If so, which sort?”

“I… well…” Raetsel’s gaze dropped to her hands, where they sat clasped in her lap. “That is… I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to have some sort of horoscope or…” She paused. “Maybe… yes. Yes, let’s begin with that.” She smoothed her skirt, though it hardly needed it. “What advice can you give me on… compatibility?”

Edel tilted her head slightly. “As in, romantic compatibility?”

“Yes.” Raetsel found a loose thread on her shawl, and wound it around her finger. “I would very much like to know which star signs are most compatible with my own. My birthday is the last day of September, as you’ll recall.”

“Yes.” Edel nodded. “Born under the sign of Libra.” She took a moment to think. “Well, keeping in mind that this isn’t a hard and fast rule, and that differences in personality, among other things, are the true test of compatibility, the signs that you are said to be best matched with are Gemini, Leo, Sagittarius, and Aquarius.” She cleared her throat. “Does that help at all?”

“I… hmmm.” Raetsel’s shoulders seemed to sag. “In way, I suppose it might be considered to be… but on the other… not so much.” She sighed. “Oh, I’m ridiculous… I should’ve _known_ a mere horoscope wouldn’t solve everything…”

“Solve everything? What needs solving?” Edel frowned. “Raetsel, is there something wrong? Is there another method of divination I can consult to set your mind at ease about whatever problem you are facing?”

“I don’t know.” Raetsel wrung her hands. “I don’t… there’s just…” She sighed again. “I need something more… more clear-cut, I think. I don’t think a tarot reading or casting the runes will do the trick.”

“Advice, then?” Edel sat back in her chair. “Do you want my guidance on a personal matter?”

“No… no, I don’t,” Raetsel said. “I want… I want a spell of some sort. To fix something that troubles me.”

“Oh?” Edel raised an eyebrow. “You are suffering from some sort of ailment, I take it?”

“You… could call it that, yes.” Raetsel let out a mirthless laugh. “An ailment of the heart, called indecision. I require _something_ to help me lay it to rest and move on with my life, one way or another.”

Edel’s frown deepened. “Raetsel… surely you must know that that is not how magic works? There is no quick fix for anything. I cannot miraculously heal a man’s leg or give a girl her hearing back, or mend someone’s emotional pain in an instant. All I can do is give them things that better their lives, that accommodate their ailments, whether physical or mental.”

“But… but I need _something!_ ” Raetsel’s voice took on a note of deep anguish. “Please, Edel… please… you’re the only one who can actually help me, please don’t refuse me. Don’t do that to me.”

“I have no wish to let you down, but neither can I do things that are impossible,” Edel replied. “Tell me of your problem, however, and I will see if I have any advice that can help you.”

“I…” Raetsel’s voice dropped. “I am stuck, Edel. I am torn in two. I do not know my own heart, and it is destroying me. Because I only have so much time to figure things out, before it is too late.”

“Too late?” Ahiru’s eyes widened. “Oh no… are you sick or something? Are you going to… to…” She trailed off, unable to voice her worry.

“What? Oh, no, nothing like that, Ahiru.” Raetsel shook her head. “I am in perfect health, don’t worry. No, the problem is…” Her gaze fell to her hands again. “I am engaged to be married in a few months’ time. But my heart may yet lie with another, one to whom my feelings are unknown… and I cannot be sure of my feelings for my fiancé either.” She clutched at her skirts. “Do you see the problem, Edel? Do you understand why I need to put a swift end to this wavering? It pains me so much, and I can’t truly move forward until I’ve put an end to it…”

“I imagine it would, yes. However…” Edel shook her head. “I cannot provide you with any sort of quick fix. Divination I will happily do for you in any form that you would like, but the ultimate choice must be yours. Even if I dispense advice it will only be for the purpose of helping you figure out on your own what is right for you, what you must do.”

“But how can I possibly know what I must do?” Raetsel’s voice rose slightly, and had a strong edge of desperation. “How can I know what is right for me? I _don’t_ know who is right for me, and that’s the entire problem here!”

“Calm down.” Edel leaned forward. “Tell me about these two that your heart wavers between – you do not need to reveal their identities if you are uncomfortable with that – and I will see what advice might be dispensed to you.”

“All right.” Raetsel’s shoulders slumped. “There is… well… to begin with, my fiancé… his name is Hans. He works as a clerk for a lawyer here in Goldkrone. He makes a respectable salary, and wanted to buy us a small house to live in, but my parents – who are very in favor of the match – insisted that he instead buy their home, while they will move to a smaller one themselves now that they don’t need all the extra space. It sounds strange, I know, but it would make things easier on me, as I would not have to move my bees and worry about the quality of my honey deteriorating or the hives dying.”

“Do you love him?” Ahiru asked.

“I…” Raetsel clutched at the ends of her shawl, pulling it tighter around herself. “I think so… when I’m with him, I’m very happy, and he always tells me he loves me, and how lucky he feels to be marrying me, and he supports me completely. He wants me to continue beekeeping and selling things at the market because he knows how much it means to me; we wouldn’t need the extra money, but it isn’t about that. He tells me how proud he is of me and it makes me feel wonderful. But…” She pressed her lips together.

“There is another.” Edel crossed her ankles. “Another for whom your heart yearns.”

“Yes.” Raetsel whispered the word. “Another whom I have loved for longer… but I am so much less certain of his feelings… indeed, I have no idea how he truly feels about me at all. And if I marry Hans while still loving another… isn’t that wrong? Aren’t I a deceitful, horrible woman?” Her voice shook. “I don’t know how I truly feel, if I still love this other man or if I truly want to be married to Hans and forsake all others… and it is tearing me in two, as I said before.”

“What do you think would happen if you told this other man of your feelings?” Edel asked. “Do you think he would be receptive? Would it drive a wedge between you? What do you risk by being open?”

“An awful lot, I’m afraid.” Raetsel stared down at the rug. “If I break off my engagement and confess to this other man and he rejects me, then I have turned away a man who truly loves me, and for nothing. If the other man accepts me, can I bear the scandal of a broken engagement for the sake of marrying another? And in either case I would… that is, he… if he turns me down, this other man, things might become unbearable, for I would still have to see him and talk to him for years to come. There would be no way of completely cutting him out of my life.”

“Why not?” Edel’s eyebrows went up again. “Does he have ties to your family? Is he a friend of yours, or related to one of your friends?”

“Yes, he is.” Raetsel nodded. “And as you probably have guessed already, both men were born under signs that are supposed to be compatible with mine. So you can see how that provided no help to me at all in deciding.”

“I figured as much. That said…” Edel’s expression hardened. “This, Raetsel, is not a problem you can solve in an instant with some spell or other – I cannot emphasize that enough. You are doing a disservice to yourself and to these men by expecting me to be able to erase your wavering with a potion or tonic, and you insult me and the work I do.”

Raetsel blanched. “I… I didn’t mean… I came to you because I hold you in high regard, I meant no insult…”

“Intended or not, it has the same effect.” Edel shook her head. “You must decide on your own in this regard. I cannot give you a magical elixir that will enable you to make your choice without any more heartache. I can advise you, perform divination for you, but ultimately the decision must be made by you, and you alone.”

“I have agonized over this.” Raetsel spoke in a low voice. “You have no idea… no idea how many sleepless nights I’ve spent trying to think clearly and decide, tossing and turning and trying to keep my weeping from being heard by my parents. I don’t know how much longer I can go on like this.”

“But Edel can’t take that away.” Ahiru reached up to fiddle with her necklace. “I know you said you have faith in her, and hold her in the highest regard… but she really can’t do impossible things, she can only do magic that actually exists. And…” She swallowed. “I – I know it must hurt to be wavering like this, and I don’t think you’re a bad person for it. But you have to decide on your own, cause there’s nothing we can do to change it or take it away. You have to keep thinking, and figuring out what your real feelings are.”

Raetsel considered her. “Have you ever been in my situation, Ahiru?”

“Wh-what? Well… I mean… no, but…” Ahiru looked down at the floor. “I – I do know what it’s like to not know how you really feel about someone, and how confusing it can be, and how much it can hurt and frustrate you. And I’ve never known anyone that could give me any sort of advice that helped me, we’re just… expected to just _know_ and it’s not fair.” She made a pouty face. “It just isn’t.”

“No… no, it’s not.” Raetsel sighed.”And it doesn’t help that this other man… my parents would not see him as suitable for me, and I feel like he might already have feelings for someone else anyway… I don’t know if confessing would make me happy or humiliate me.”

“What about him isn’t suitable?” Ahiru asked. “Does he not have a good job or something?”

“No, he has a very good and well-respected occupation… but he _is_ older than I am.” Raetsel turned her head to stare at the fire. “By many years. Hans is a couple years older than I am, so that is considered an acceptable match, but my parents would be displeased if I were to wed someone so far past my own age. I don’t know how it is elsewhere, but here such marriages are frowned upon, because it casts a bad light on both parties – the younger of the pair is usually assumed to be seeking riches rather than love, while the older is viewed with suspicion for having been unable to find someone their own age to be with, and seen as… well, as a bit creepy.” She sighed again. “It is, of course, none of anyone’s business, and terribly judgmental to cast aspersions on anyone for their choice of marriage partners if their choice is kind to them and good and their love true. But as much as I might want things to be different, I must live with how they are now and face any consequences for my decision that might arise should I take the ‘wrong’ path.”

“… I see.” Edel’s expression changed slightly; it was as though something had suddenly clicked into place for her. She was clearly trying to keep her face neutral, but Ahiru could practically hear the gears turning in her head. “I think… that at last I see the problem.”

“Oh? Does that mean you…” Raetsel’s voice trailed off and her eyes narrowed as she came to the same conclusion Ahiru had. “Oh. Really. You do. So… this must be terribly awkward for you, then.”

Edel shook her head. “Not in the way you think.”

“Is that so? What way _is_ it awkward, then?” Raetsel folded her arms. “Do tell me.”

“Huh?” Ahiru looked back and forth between the two of them. “Wh-what’s going on? Are you… are you mad at Edel? What’s happening? I feel so lost…”

Edel opened her mouth to say something, but Raetsel cut her off before she could. “It’s simple, Ahiru – as I said before, I believe the man I am unsure about my feelings towards, the one I am not engaged to, I think that he already has feelings for someone else. And that someone else is Edel herself.” She took a deep breath and let it out. “In fact, it may be that they are already together.”

“I am involved with no man.” Edel’s voice was calm, but Ahiru could see a hint of irritation in her eyes. “I never have been and I never will be.”

“Could have fooled me.” Raetsel sniffed. “The way you and Charon carry on like that, why… anyone would mistake it for flirting.”

“It isn’t.” Edel’s expression hardened. “Whatever you may think you see there, we are not interested in each other and never have been. You don’t have to feel threatened by me.”

“Wh… what?” Ahiru’s eyes widened as it finally dawned on her. “Raetsel, you… that other man… it’s… it’s not _Charon,_ is it?”

“I’m afraid it is.” Raetsel sighed, and then returned her attention to Edel. “I didn’t want to tell you his name, and that’s the real reason I was slightly uncomfortable with coming to you for any sort of advice on the matter, but since you’ve clearly figured it out on your own without my having to say so there’s no use in me pretending otherwise.”

“It’s… well, you gave yourself away, between yesterday and today.” Edel uncrossed her ankles. “Your words about an older man, who is related to a friend of yours and a part of your life for good, made sense of your odd behavior yesterday. But, Raetsel…” Her eyes softened and she leaned forward. “Please, believe me when I say you have nothing to be jealous of. True, I cannot speak for Charon’s feelings, but if he has any for me, he has kept them well-hidden over the years. And as for my own… they are strictly platonic where he is concerned.”

“What if he _did_ wish to be involved with you?” Raetsel tugged on the loose thread again. “What would you do? What would you say?”

“I would remind him that I have never been interested in men.” Ahiru’s eyes widened at this admission. “And that I am involved with someone already even if I were.”

“You… you are?” Ahiru stared at her. “I – I didn’t know that…”

Raetsel raised an eyebrow. “Neither did I.”

“That is because few know, and I expect you both to be discreet after you leave this room.” Edel cleared her throat. “There are reasons for us to maintain our privacy, and I ask that you respect that.”

“I… of course.” Raetsel nodded. “I would never… I…” Her shoulders slumped. “Oh, Edel, I’m sorry… I’m so sorry. That I didn’t know is no excuse for my rude behavior…”

“It’s all right.” Edel shook her head. “You are going through a very difficult time indeed, and your emotions are frayed thin, and I can easily see how you would mistake my friendship with Charon for something else. I cannot hold it against you.”

“I can hold it against myself, however.” Raetsel sighed. “And I am still no closer to making my choice…”

“I wish I could help you.” Edel took a deep breath and let it out. “I truly do. But… there is nothing I can do for you, save for advising you to think hard about what you really want, and have courage and faith in your instincts. I am also willing to try other divination methods, if you think it could help… but beyond that, there is no magical cure for your pain. And I am sorry.”

“No, don’t apologize, I was wrong to seek such a thing.” Raetsel’s hands relaxed in her lap. “You’re right, I have to keep thinking about this and decide on my own. And…” She looked over at Ahiru. “I should have said so before, but… thank you. I _had_ begun to think that my wavering made me a bad person, so your words mean a lot to me. I’m sorry I didn’t say so earlier.”

“Oh no, it’s okay, I understand.” Ahiru shook her head. “And I’m just glad it could help you feel a little better, cause being unsure about your feelings doesn’t make you or anyone else a bad person at all, feelings can be really confusing. Doing bad things would be bad, but you’re just… trying to find answers, you know?”

“I shouldn’t have tried to take the easy way, though, you and Edel were right.” Raetsel lifted her basket off the table and set it on her lap. “Maybe you didn’t help me in the way I intended for you to, Edel, but all the same you deserve to keep these as a gift, or as payment for setting me back on the right path. However you want to see it.” She took the three jars of honey out and set them on the table, and then put the cloth back in the basket. “I hope you’ll enjoy them. Both of you.”

“I’m sure we will, your honey is always so good!” Ahiru said. “I think it’s the best I’ve ever had, really…”

“You’re too kind.” Raetsel smiled. “As always.” She gathered her shawl closer around herself and stood up, sliding the basket onto her arm as she did. “Well, in any case, I won’t keep you any longer… I think I need to go home and think hard on some things.” She let out a sad little laugh. “You will wish me luck, won’t you?”

“Luck and wisdom and happiness.” Edel stood, and moved around the table so that she could clasp Raetsel’s hands in hers. “I want nothing but the best for you, believe me. And whatever conclusion you come to, whatever turn your life takes, know that I will support you no matter what. You have a friend in me and shall not lose it, even if all others abandon you.”

“I…” Raetsel blinked, and Ahiru could see tears shining in her eyes. “Thank you, Edel… that means more to me than I can say…”

“And me too!” Ahiru sprang up from her chair, and hurried over so that she could lay one of her hands atop Edel’s. Even compared to the two of them hers was much smaller, due to her diminutive size. “I’ll always support you too.”

“Thank you, Ahiru.” Raetsel smiled. “I’m glad I got to talk to you today.” She pulled her hands out of Edel’s grasp so she could dab at her eyes. “I’m going to head home now, and I feel braver and stronger thanks to the two of you; I cannot thank you enough for that.”

“Our pleasure.” Edel smiled, and Ahiru nodded her agreement.

They walked her back to the front door, where they bid her farewell and reiterated their wishes for her happiness. After that Edel returned to the sitting room to fetch the honey and properly store it, while Ahiru went to her room and did some reading for Mr. Katz’ class, writing down notes at intervals when something inspired her. As he’d promised, it was a much more lighthearted novel than the last one, and she was enjoying it considerably more. She knew Lilie would be appalled at her preferences, but she didn’t care; a thing being darker and sadder didn’t automatically make it better, and she’d stick to that position all her life.

They ate dinner as the sun completed its descent into the sky, enjoying a light meal by candlelight and talking about what had happened during the day. Ahiru and Edel told Fakir a little bit about the consultation with Raetsel, but nothing that would compromise her privacy. It felt awkward keeping from him that his friend whom he considered to be a big sister was possibly in love with his father, but Ahiru knew there was no way she could reveal Raetsel’s secret without her permission, so she pushed the thought out of her mind as best she could. Still, it was hard not to wonder about the outcome of Raetsel’s dilemma: what if she _did_ end up with Charon? How would Fakir feel about that? It was such an odd thing to think about.

When she got back to her room and lit her lamp and a fire in her hearth, one of the first things Ahiru saw in the flickering light was the astrology book on her table. Edel and Raetsel’s discussion of compatibility between signs had reminded her: the upcoming lesson this Friday would focus on those sorts of horoscopes and readings. Should she finally peek ahead, or could she wait a few more days?

No. She couldn’t wait. Her heart racing with anticipation and a little fear, Ahiru grabbed the book off the table and laid it on her bed. She changed into her nightclothes in a hurry, and then scrambled under the covers and opened up the book to the right section, her hands trembling a little. Her birthday was in late June, making her a Cancer, while Fakir… Fakir was a Pisces. She almost wanted to giggle at that, because it seemed like he ought to be the one represented by a crab, if only for the inherent pun about his personality. Otherwise, though, his sign seemed to suit him fairly well.

She had to do a little searching before she found the section that went over her potential compatibility with someone of his star sign in more detail. A chart at the beginning of her overall love profile revealed that they scored highly on compatibility, communication, and – this made her blush – sex.  Ahiru wanted more information than just that, though, so she proceeded to the in-depth analysis.

Her breath caught in her throat as she read, and her heart increased its speed further. The book called him an ideal match for her, and said that he would ensure they moved in harmony, and that more than anything else he was a partner who would always understand her. Which was true – he always seemed to understand her feelings and what she was trying to say, even when she couldn’t get her words out right. It went on to emphasize that aspect of their relationship – well, potential relationship – by saying that it was one of her very best sign matches and that they’d intuitively understand each other and provide the things they both needed.

The author then started talking about how they’d work together on financial matters, and other things about how they’d emotionally support each other, what they’d enjoy together and the potential pitfalls that they’d need to watch out for,  with an overall emphasis on how good and effective a match it was. There was even a short paragraph devoted to how sex between them would be. Ahiru paused before looking at it, her face feeling like it was on fire, but then she gave in and read on. Unsurprisingly, given the rest of the glowing praise for the potential compatibility between them, it stated that that aspect of their relationship would be wonderful and powerful too, talking about the emotional connection between them and how good it would be for both of them.

After that it moved on to a different sign’s compatibility with others, so Ahiru closed the book and set it aside, picking up her duck pillow instead and clutching it to her chest. Her heart was still racing, and she didn’t have any idea how to describe the feelings surging through her. Based on what she’d already read of the signs in her astrology lessons she’d guessed that it would tell her that they had _some_ degree of compatibility, but she hadn’t quite expected _this_ much. Obviously it was still all down to individuals, and was more of a general overview on potential, but it was still overwhelming to read such a thing and think about what that could mean for them.

 _Did_ it mean anything for them? Ahiru made a tiny noise in the back of her throat and rolled over so that she could get up and put her book away and douse the lamp. Under the covers in the dark, she felt almost as if she wanted to cry for some strange reason. She and Fakir had _that_ much potential… it seemed almost unreal. It didn’t seem likely to be fulfilled, but all the same… she now knew something much more definitive, that set to rest some of the questions she’d been wrestling with lately.

She now knew with unwavering certainty that she desperately _wanted_ to be with Fakir, regardless of what her chances with him actually were.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bienenstich cake, also known as bee sting cake, is a German dessert made of sweet yeast dough topped with caramelized almonds and filled with either buttercream, cream, or vanilla custard.


	20. Chapter 20

As March faded away, so too did the harshest of the weather. Rain still fell, but it was gentler, softer, lacking the howling winds, and did not feel as bitingly cold as it had before. More and more flowers blossomed as spring truly got underway, the trees fully regained their leaves, and seasonal vegetables began to fill the marketplace. Everything felt green and alive, and Ahiru rejoiced in it.

Midway through the month, a letter arrived on Thursday stating that Mr. Katz had caught a cold and would not be able to hold their lesson that week but hoped to resume them the following Friday. Ahiru sent back a note wishing for his swift recovery along with some remedies from Edel’s stores, and then accepted Edel’s invitation to accompany her into town for some shopping, in lieu of her tutoring. Fakir, meanwhile, arranged to spend the day working at Charon’s forge.

Ahiru saw him leave on Friday morning, just as she’d come out of her room and started towards the kitchen. She called out to him and waved goodbye, and received the same in return. She ate breakfast largely on her own – for Edel had already finished eating too – and then proceeded to the workroom for today’s divination lesson once she’d cleaned up. She’d had her final astrology lesson last week, so she felt all a-flutter with excitement to see what came next.

When she got there she found that Edel had pulled up a chair across from hers at the table she always sat at, and there was a book open waiting for her. “Go ahead and sit down,” Edel said with a smile, indicating her chair. “We’ll sit here and conduct your lesson.”

Ahiru peered at the book as she seated herself. On the two pages were illustrations of hands. “What’s it about?”

“Today you will be learning palmistry, which is also known as chiromancy.” Edel folded her hands. “It is the art not just of reading palms, but of interpreting hands and fingers. It’s often viewed as not just a way to predict the future, but also to reveal what has already happened. In fact, given that our hands change as we age, it may be that that is its primary function. It’s the subject of some disagreement, and not everyone views it as true divination.”

Ahiru tilted her head, glancing again at the open book. “What do _you_ think?”

“I feel it is a bit of both.” Edel rested her chin on her joined fingers. “You might have heard proverbs about the likelihood of repeating the past if one forgets it? That is my general approach to this art. It’s primary use is revealing what has come before, yes, but I do not feel that that is useless when regarding the future – quite the opposite. It’s by learning from our past mistakes and successes alike that we find a better future. And self-reflection and introspection on the you that once was will lead to personal improvements in the present and beyond. Palmistry is, therefore, a tool to help along those things, to encourage reflection and examination of the self and the past in order to bring about a brighter future. It is guidance, the same as any other method of divination.”

“Oh, that makes sense!” Ahiru nodded. “I’ve heard some different things about palm reading, some people think it’s nonsense, and other people think it’s scary because if you have a short life line or something it means you’re going to die young.” She swallowed.

“It means nothing of the sort.” Edel laughed. “I can see how such a misconception arose in people’s minds and then took hold, but the fact remains that it is inaccurate. What it _does_ show or represent is general health and wellbeing, as well as major life changes. By interpreting that line a person can get an idea of how they have been doing and start to think about how to improve or maintain their health, and also possibly think about how a major life change has affected them and where they should go from there. Nothing in it predicts death, early or otherwise.”

“Oh, that’s good!” Ahiru couldn’t resist another look at the book. “So, um… am I going to study from this and then try reading yours, or are you going to read mine and show me what everything means, or…”

“I think it best if you do a little reading from the book first.” Edel sat back in her chair. “Get to know what each line means and how to interpret the hand as a whole, and then we can try it out and see how you do.”

“A-all right.” Ahiru pulled the book in front of her, and began to read.

She studied it for over an hour, going over all the palm lines and what each one’s variations meant, as well as what other parts of the hands meant depending on their size and shape. Also included in the book were possible questions that could be asked as follow-ups to an interpretation of this or that thing, in order to encourage reflection and careful thought on the part of the person receiving the reading. Once she felt confident enough to move on and give it a try – or to be more accurate, excited and impatient to try it out regardless of her confidence levels – she pushed the book aside and told Edel she was ready.

“Here, then.” Edel held out her hand to Ahiru. “Begin with the heart line.”

“Okay…” Ahiru took Edel’s hand and studied the line she knew to be the heart line. “Hmmm, it… it starts below your index finger, so that means… that you’re satisfied with your love life.” She glanced at the book to make sure. “Yeah! So…” She fidgeted. “It – it says to ask some follow-up questions, but that seems really personal and none of my business and this is just practice anyway so we’ll skip that… next is the head line, right?”

“Right.” Edel nodded.

“Okay.” Ahiru examined the next line. “Let’s see… yours is deep and long, so that means your thinking is clear and focused.” She smiled. “That sounds right!”

“Thank you, Ahiru.” She smiled too. “I certainly hope so.”

“ _I_ think so!” Ahiru looked back down at Edel’s palm. “Anyway, the life line… yours is curvy, so…” She took another glance at the book. “That means you have lots of energy, which definitely sounds right too.”

“I suppose.” Edel shrugged. “And the last is the fate line.”

“The fate line… yeah…” Ahiru leaned closer to better peer at it. “It, um… it looks kind of like it starts joined to your life line… that means you’re a self-made individual, and…” She glanced back at the book. “Oh, and that you developed aspirations early on.”

“That is both… well, accurate to some degree and yet also does not tell the whole story.” Edel brushed a wisp of hair out of her eye with her other hand. “I did aspire to witchcraft at a young age, correct, but as for being self-made… I do not think that any person can wholly claim such a thing. But I have made and maintained my reputation myself, with my own hard work and integrity, and so I suppose that in _that_ sense I can be said to be self-made. I owe many of my accomplishments to those who have taught and guided and supported me along my path, however.”

“Yeah, I don’t think anybody’s really one hundred percent self-made either.” Ahiru shifted in her seat. “Do you want me to interpret the rest of the stuff about your hand?”

“Hmmm… might as well, I suppose.” Edel shrugged. “I already know much of this about myself, but I’d like to see you give it a try.”

“All right.”

Ahiru had to review her book more for that portion of the reading, as it was more complicated and harder for her to get a good idea of what Edel’s hand fit into as far as shapes and sizes of aspects of it went. Her hand shape, for one thing, did not fall neatly into one of the four basic elemental interpretations, instead ending up as something of a middle ground between Earth and Air. Edel explained that this sort of thing was more common than people thought, and assured her that other parts of the hand could be more difficult to read on one person than on another, depending on their age and other factors, and that she should not feel bad. Reading the lines on the palm was much more common, and commonly asked for, anyway; if she should be approached by someone seeking a palmistry session, they were more likely to only want their actual palms read, and less likely to even _know_ about the other aspects of the art. All the same, it was still important for her to learn, just on the off-chance that she _did_ get asked to include those things.

Edel then conducted a complete reading of Ahiru’s hand, which she found very interesting, and following that they had an in-depth discussion of the suggested questions and how someone giving a reading might encourage self-reflection in their customer. They talked until it was nearly time for lunch, at which point Edel headed to the kitchen after instructing Ahiru to hang onto the book and review it when she could. They would only spend a few weeks on palmistry at the most, as it was simpler than the other divinatory arts she had in mind to teach her, but it didn’t hurt to take time in between lesson days to review and memorize and practice.

Fakir didn’t come home for lunch, and so she and Edel ate in silence together. Ahiru read about palmistry in between bites, and Edel went over her shopping list. It promised to be a busy afternoon, for they had several stops to make. It didn’t take Ahiru as long to get ready to go anymore, however, which was a big help. It wasn’t cold enough anymore to warrant bundling up in a cloak and scarf, she could get away with merely putting a reasonably thick coat on over her gown and slipping on gloves. The spring breeze felt a little chilly today as she stepped outside, but walking to and from the market, not to mention through the market itself, would warm her up in no time, so she didn’t let it bother her.

“Thank you for agreeing to come with me, Ahiru,” Edel said as they walked along. “Your help in carrying everything will be invaluable.”

“Of course, I don’t mind at all.” Ahiru dodged around a small puddle on the ground. It had just rained the other day, and things were still a little damp in places. “And it’ll be good to see everybody, too.”

Edel smiled. “Indeed.”

They continued on into Goldkrone, talking little except for when Ahiru exclaimed over this or that thing she observed – such as baby birds in a nest above their heads – and eventually reached the bustling marketplace. Excitement buzzed through Ahiru as she glanced around. “Where to first?”

Edel consulted her list. “Nan Geizsler’s, I think – we’re running low on cheese, so I might as well pick up some more now.”

They found Nan sitting at her stall and glancing at a letter held in her hand; at their approach she hastily folded it up and stuffed it in a coat pocket as she rose to her feet. “Ah! Hello, Miss Edel, sorry, sorry – what can I do for you today?”

“No need to apologize,” Edel said with a laugh. “How have you been, Nan?”

“Good, good.” Nan nodded. “I was just reading a letter from a cousin who lives in the city – went there to be a governess for a wealthy family.”

“Oh? Is she doing well?”

“ _Very_ well.” Nan grinned. “Apparently they introduced her to a lonely widower they’re friends with, and now she is to marry him! Ah…” She sighed. “Some women have all the luck…”

“I don’t know. It can be hard, I think, to come after someone who has passed.” Edel picked up a wheel of cheese and examined it. “It can be easy to fear that you are being compared to the deceased and found wanting. It isn’t always the case, of course, but not everyone has the strength of self to push aside such worries.”

“True.” Nan sighed. “Though it probably helps to talk to the person and make sure of it, get reassurance.”

“It does, yes.” Edel nodded. “Communication is key in any relationship, after all.”

“Yes. And besides, for that amount of money, I bet she’s willing to forgive living in the shadow of a ghost anyway.” Nan laughed. “I kid, though. Wealth is very nice, but it won’t keep you warm at night or fortify your heart against insecurities. If I were to marry someone who’d been widowed, I’d want plenty of reassurance that I was not just a poor imitation or replacement for the one they’d lost.” She sighed. “Not that I ever will…”

“Don’t say that.” Ahiru shook her head. “You never know.”

“Ah, but I do, Ahiru.” Nan smiled sadly. “You see, I’m sweet on someone who barely acknowledges me. Not because he’s cruel, mind, but because I rarely see him due to… circumstances. He can’t often make it to market, but when he does, he usually comes by for some of my cheese… however, he doesn’t seem to see me as anything more than a shopkeeper.” She sighed again.

“But he is kind to you?” Edel asked.

“Oh, yes!” Nan clasped her hands. “He’s ever so polite, and handsome, and wealthy too, and well-educated… I’ve heard that he’s a widower himself, but you know the rumor mill around here.” She rolled her eyes. “I’m sure you remember all the wild stories that circulated about poor Princess Rue when she first showed up as the Prince’s fiancée. Utter nonsense.”

“What?” Ahiru’s eyes went wide. “Wh-what kinds of things were they saying about her?”

“Oh, nothing worth dwelling on.” Nan waved a hand dismissively. “Like I said, utter nonsense, and most of it malicious, born of jealousy that an unknown noble lady from another land _dared_ to marry the prince.” She rolled her eyes again. “Some of the less kind folk in town were saying all sorts of nasty things about where she came from and making up stories – why, some people even claimed that she wasn’t human, but was actually some wicked, ugly fairy creature wearing a glamour, who’d bring the prince and the country to ruin. Thankfully, that sort of slander was soon stamped out, and really, most people love her. And why shouldn’t they? She’s a lovely, kind lady who’s done nothing wrong.”

“You know how some people are.” Edel sighed. “And wasn’t there talk of… some sort of arrangement to be made for the prince’s marriage, before he happened upon her?”

“Could be.” Nan shrugged. “I don’t remember all that well. But if there was, well, that explains the vitriol – some bitter would-be princess seeking to sabotage Rue’s reputation. Or the disgruntled parents of a would-be princess seeking revenge for an agreement that fell through. Petty, but that’s human nature for you.”

“Indeed.” Edel looked over a log of cheese, and then put it with the others she’d set aside. “In any case, I think I’ve found all I need… so if you could tell me the price, I’d like to pay you.”

“Oh, certainly!”

Nan calculated the total, and Edel paid her the money before packing the various cheeses into her basket. They bid her goodbye and then headed off to their next stop, which turned out to be Raetsel’s stall. “Good day, Raetsel,” Edel greeted her as they drew near.

“Ah? Oh! Edel!” Raetsel seemed to shake herself out of deep thought and smiled at them. “And Ahiru too, how good to see you both. How are you?”

“We’re very well today, thank you,” Edel said. Ahiru nodded, as if to confirm it. “And you? Have you made any progress on the matter we discussed recently?”

“I have, yes.” Raetsel’s smile broadened. “Not without some heartache along the way, but it was fleeting, and I’m in a much better place emotionally now. I cannot thank you two enough for your help.”

“Oh – oh no, I really didn’t do anything at all, I…” Ahiru waved her hands in front of herself, her eyes wide. “It was all Edel, not me…”

“Don’t sell yourself short, Ahiru.” Raetsel laughed. “Your words meant a lot to me too.”

“I… w-well, well… then… I’m glad…” Ahiru blushed.

“As am I.” Edel nodded. “Do you feel comfortable telling us the outcome?”

“There’s no one else I’d rather tell.” Raetsel drew her shawl closer around herself as a cold breeze whistled through. “I started by speaking to one of the… involved parties, shall we say.” She winked. “Whatever feelings I had turned out to be unrequited all along, and that helped me set to rest those feelings, and to work out on my own that they’d largely been built up by me into something they weren’t. That is to say – a fanciful girl believed a silly old crush was something stronger and deeper, but that was a mere illusion.”

“That can happen all too easily.” Edel nodded in agreement. “To anyone.”

“No kidding.” Raetsel laughed. “And with that settled, I found it easier to figure out where the other party stands with me. To wrap this up as quickly as I can, our engagement is still on, and I am thrilled. If a little frustrated.” She rolled her eyes. “Only because of delays with the process of buying and selling and renovating property, however – once we have a schedule for when we can move in, Hans and I can set our wedding date and get things going on setting ourselves up in our home. It doesn’t help that the office he works in has been exceedingly busy lately.” She sighed. “All will work out in the end, though, I know it. We just have to be patient.”

“A good attitude to have.” Edel smiled. “And I wish you both very well.”

“Thanks.” Raetsel smoothed some of her hair down. “Anyway, what can I do for you both today? Have you come for honey, beeswax, candles? Some combination of those things?”

“All three, yes.” Edel glanced at her list again. “Running a bit short on all three, so we’re stopping by today rather than wait, as we have other business here anyway.”

“Then I’ll get you sorted out quick, so you can get that done.” Raetsel picked up a jar of beeswax and set it aside. “Just tell me what you need and how much of it.”

Edel directed her to all the things she wanted and needed, and Raetsel fetched them out and got them organized with almost startling efficiency. The cost was swiftly calculated, and Edel paid her before loading everything into her basket (some rearrangement had to be done, naturally, to avoid squishing the delicate cheeses). Once they’d got that done they headed off again.

Next came the butcher shop, where Edel bought some sausages, meat for a roast she’d prepare tomorrow, and replenished their supply of cold cuts. The sausages and raw meat went into a separate basket that she’d lined with two layers of absorbent cloth, while the cold cuts were given to Ahiru to carry in her basket.

“Only one more stop, thankfully.” Edel crumpled up her list and deposited it into one of her baskets. “I’d like a few pastries and maybe some bread, so we’re going to stop by Ebine’s bakery and then head home. Unless there’s somewhere you’d like to visit?”

“No, not today.” Ahiru shook her head. “Going home right after Ebine’s sounds good… not that I’m bored or anything, just…” She cast a glance up at the sky. “It kind of looks like it might start to rain soon, doesn’t it?”

“Yes, I did notice things darkening a bit.” Edel frowned. “It’s no guarantee of anything, but it wouldn’t hurt to conclude our business here and get home as soon as we can, lest we be caught in a downpour.” She adjusted the baskets on her arm and quickened her pace, forcing Ahiru to hurry to catch up. “Come, let’s go see Ebine and get some treats.”

They fortunately didn’t have far to go to before they reached the cheery little shop that belonged to Ebine. A brightly painted sign bearing her name hung over the old and somewhat scratched-up wooden door, and in the well-polished windows a tempting array of baked goods beckoned customers in. Ahiru felt her stomach growl just at the sight, the sound drowned out by a bell on the door ringing as Edel entered. “Ebine?”

“Edel!” Ebine appeared behind the counter from the back room of the bakery, and her face lit up. “So good to see you, it’s been a few days!” She hurried out and over to Edel, and the two women embraced. “How’ve you been?” she asked once they finally pulled apart. “Life treating you well?”

“Yes.” Edel nodded. “And you? How are you feeling?”

“Oh, you know…” Ebine shrugged and tucked a stray hair back into her updo. “This time of year always sets off my allergies, but as long as I keep taking those medicines you brew for me I can power through. And the spring weather always brightens my mood.” She sighed as if relieved. “It’s so good to have sunlight and warmth back again, you know? Even if not completely. And so many flowers…”

“Heh.” Edel smiled. “I should have brought you some.”

“Oh, no, don’t feel bad about that, I visited that nice Freya girl yesterday and bought some to put in a vase.” Ebine laughed. “Besides, you just got me some last week – you don’t need to bring them _every_ time.”

“True.” Edel laughed. “I’m afraid we can’t stay long, today, though – just need to pick up a few things and then head home before the weather truly turns.”

“We?” Ebine glanced over, and seemed to see Ahiru for the first time; she blinked, and her face turned a little pink. “Ah… Ahiru… I’m so sorry, I didn’t – that is – how are you?” She coughed into a handkerchief that she pulled out of her apron pocket.

“I’m very good, thank you.” Ahiru smiled. “It’s nice to see you.”

“Yes… same to you…” Ebine coughed again, and then returned her attention. “Ah… you said you want to buy a few things, right? And something about the weather?”

“Yes.” Edel nodded. “It looks like a storm might be brewing, so I’d like to make a few purchases and then hurry home. I’m sorry we can’t stay,” she added.

“It’s all right, I understand.” Ebine sighed. “At least the rain will water the flowers, eh? But I can’t wait for more reliably clear skies.” She headed back behind the counter. “Anyway, what can I get for you two?”

“A fresh loaf of bread, I think… and let me look over these pastries.” Edel peered at the neatly arranged baked goods. “Ahiru, help me choose, won’t you?”

“Oh! Of course!” Ahiru practically stood on her toes with excitement before setting herself to the task of picking sweets to take home with them.

She helped Edel pick out several treats, though her indecisiveness and desire to try everything slowed them down a bit. When at last all choices were made Ebine packaged up the pastries in a box and wrapped up the bread Edel had selected, and Ahiru carefully packed them into her basket alongside the cold cuts while Edel paid for everything.

“We’re still on for Sunday lunch, right?” Ebine asked as she counted out Edel’s change.

“Of course.” Edel accepted the coins from her and put them away. “Anything I need to bring?”

“Just some of your wonderful tea blends and your company.” Ebine smiled. “Now, you two better hurry home before that rain hits – it’s looking pretty foreboding out there.”

Edel followed her gaze to the window, and frowned. “Yes, you’re right. Thank you for everything, Ebine, and I’ll see you in a couple days.”

Ebine reached over and took Edel’s hand to give it a quick squeeze. “Take care.”

They headed out of the shop, and walked at a somewhat hurried pace back in the direction of home. Edel and Ahiru both stole nervous glances at the rapidly darkening sky from time to time, and Edel seemed additionally distracted by something else as well. At last, when they were near to the outskirts of Goldkrone, she spoke. “Ahiru, I… did you… that is to say… have you guessed?”

“Guessed?” Ahiru turned to look at her. “Guessed about what?”

“About… Ebine and myself.” Edel seemed very focused on the cloth covering one of her baskets. “We are… well, do you remember what I said to Raetsel about being involved with someone? That is who I meant.”

“Wh-what? Oh… oh no, I didn’t guess… was I supposed to?” Ahiru frowned. “I’m sorry…”

“No, no, it’s all right.” Edel shook her head. “It was not a test. In any case, though, I must ask that you remain discreet – we have our reasons for staying private.”

“Oh, of course! I’d never reveal anything you didn’t want me to!” Ahiru nodded. “Your secret’s safe with me!”

“Thank you, Ahiru.” Edel smiled. “I appreciate it.”

“You’re welcome.” Ahiru smiled back.

Thunder rumbled in the sky above as they made their way through the outskirts, past all the other houses. Fortunately, the storm waited to unleash its full fury until they’d made it inside; an almost ear-splitting crack preceded it, and then the downpour began. Edel and Ahiru, having entered the house mere minutes ago and still standing in the front hall, exchanged glances that said all that they were thinking.

“I’ll be in the library if you need me,” Edel said as she walked off, somehow managing to carry all three baskets. “I’m going to put these things away first, and then I have some letters I need to write. See you at dinner otherwise.”

“All right, see you.” For her part, Ahiru had no idea what she wanted to do with the rest of her afternoon; she stood there dawdling as she tried to think of something. Reading? Studying? There was no work to be done in the basement and she’d sent her own letters out yesterday, so that was done too. She’d been considering going to the library earlier to find some new book to read, but if Edel was in there she didn’t want to disturb her… what to do instead?

While she debated it the door slammed open behind her. Ahiru jumped slightly and stifled a quack with her hand before turning around to see a dripping wet Fakir barge in. He met her gaze as he shut the door. “Hey.”

“H-hi…” Ahiru tried not to stare or let her eyes go too wide, despite that Fakir was soaked through, evidently having been unable to avoid getting caught in the rain. “You – you… um… are you okay? I mean… are you going to be okay? I mean… I… um…”

“If I go warm up right now I hopefully shouldn’t catch a cold, if that’s what you’re worrying about.” Fakir stripped off his coat, and Ahiru’s heart lurched at the sight of his simple white linen shirt clinging to him and outlining every detail of his upper body. “Charon sent me home when he saw that it looked like it was going to rain, but I obviously didn’t make it in time.” He made a disgusted noise low in his throat. “And like an idiot, I didn’t have a cloak with me…”

“Th-that’s not your fault!” Ahiru shook her head. “You didn’t know, cause it looked fine this morning when you left, and it’s been so nice lately that we haven’t needed our cloaks to keep warm, s-so you shouldn’t feel bad or beat yourself up about not having yours today…”

“True, but it doesn’t make it any less annoying to have this happen.” He sighed. “I’m going to go run a hot bath and get dried off; I’ll see you at dinner.”

“Y-yeah, good idea… see you at dinner…” Ahiru swallowed; her heart was pounding so hard at the images racing through her head that it was a wonder he couldn’t hear it. Fakir… taking off the rest of his wet clothes… soaking in the tub… drying his naked body off with a towel… she hid her burning face in her hands, despite that he couldn’t see her anymore, and tried to banish the thoughts from her mind.

She spent the rest of the afternoon lying in bed, listening to the rain and trying not to think about what Fakir was doing. It proved to be too difficult a task, however, and after a while she finally gave into temptation and relieved the pressure building inside her, relying on a pillow across her face and the din of the storm outside to sufficiently muffle any noise she made. She drifted off to sleep once she was done and didn’t wake up until later, close to dinner time.

The fire she’d built in her hearth had all but completely guttered by the time she awoke, leaving her in near-total darkness; Ahiru blinked and sat up, unsure of what the time was. She glanced down at her slightly rumpled dress and blushed, remembering what she’d done before falling asleep. Or rather, what had _made_ her fall asleep. Outside the rain was still pouring as heavily as it had been before her impromptu nap, and in the deep shadows she couldn’t see her clock.

A knock on the door startled her. “Ahiru?”

“Fakir?” She tried to make her voice sound normal, as if she hadn’t just been thinking about – “What is it?”

“It’s dinner time. Do you want to come eat?” He paused. “Or are you not hungry?”

“What? Oh!” She sprang up from the bed, and smoothed her dress down as best she could. “S-sorry, yes, I do want to come… come eat, I mean, I…” She buried her face in her hands, grateful for the closed door between them. “Sorry, am I late?”

“Not really, just… well, I wondered why you weren’t there yet. Do you want me to wait for you?”

“N-no, that’s okay, I… I’ll be right there, I’m ready, go ahead and go…” She hurried over to her mirror and made sure her hair didn’t look too strange. “I just fell asleep, sorry…”

He didn’t reply; evidently he’d already walked away. Ahiru took a deep breath to try and collect herself before heading out of the room and to the kitchen. When she got there, she found Edel had built up a nice fire in the hearth and lit several lamps so that they could see well enough despite how dark it was outside. Tea had been brewed already, and Edel had made warm sandwiches for them and heated some sausages in addition to the rest of the cold spread. Fakir was in his usual spot at the table, and Edel looked up from pouring tea as Ahiru entered. “Ah, good evening.”

“Hi, sorry… I…” Ahiru wasn’t able to suppress a yawn. “I fell asleep…”

“That’s quite all right.” She smiled and set a steaming cup of tea down at Ahiru’s place, and then sat in her own chair. “Weather like this, especially after a busy day like the one we had today, can have that effect. I nearly nodded off myself while writing letters.” She laughed. “Luckily, I didn’t – wouldn’t do to have ink all over my face, now would it?”

Ahiru giggled and sat down. “That’d look pretty silly.”

“Indeed.” Edel sipped her tea. “Hopefully you didn’t sleep so long as to impede your rest tonight, though.”

“Oh no, I don’t think I did.” Ahiru shook her head. “I should be fine, I feel awake now, so I can go read or do something after dinner and then go to bed… maybe a little later than usual, I don’t know, but it’s not like I have to be somewhere really early tomorrow so if I end up sleeping in a little that would be fine…” She took a bite of her sandwich.

“True.” Edel began to slice her sausage. “I might ask you to come with me on a few deliveries tomorrow, but that won’t happen very early, and most of them are in the afternoon anyway.”

“Oh, definitely!” Ahiru nodded. “I’d love to come along! Although… do you think the weather will be okay by then?” She glanced over her shoulder at the window.

“I have no idea.” Edel shrugged. “But our cloaks are clean and ready for us if it’s still raining, so if we have to brave the storm at least we’ll be protected. And if it’s really bad you don’t have to come along.”

“Yes, I would, I couldn’t just leave you to go out by yourself in weather like _this_.” Ahiru paused to chew and swallow a bite of sausage. “I don’t think that would be very nice of me, I wouldn’t want to do that, and I’d worry about you the whole time… so I’ll go with you either way.”

“I don’t think it’d reflect badly on you as a person if you stayed behind in such a storm, but it’s up to you.” Edel shrugged again. “And anyway it might not even become an issue. Try not to worry too much about it.”

“Okay…” Ahiru risked a quick glance at Fakir, her first since she’d sat down; his gaze was on his food, and he didn’t realize her eyes were on him, even briefly. His hair appeared to be thoroughly dry by now, and looked so soft that she ached to run her fingers through it. She still didn’t quite know exactly what she felt for him, if it was love yet or not, but she _did_ know that she desperately yearned to have a romantic relationship with him. She wanted him to look at her the way Siegfried looked at Rue, she wanted to be held and kissed and…and _everything_. She wanted it all with him. A pity it wasn’t likely to ever happen. She restrained a sigh and tried to concentrate on eating her own food.

Near the end of the meal lightning streaked across the sky, briefly illuminating the room a little with its glow. Ahiru shrank down in her seat in anticipation of the thunder soon to follow, and when it did she couldn’t help but shudder at its volume: so loud the house itself seemed to rumble. She caught Fakir’s eye by accident, and he frowned. “Are you all right?”

“Y-yeah, mostly… I…” Ahiru swallowed. “I just don’t like loud noises, is all… when I was little I always used to hide under my bed during thunderstorms.” Her shoulders drooped. “I – I know that sounds so silly and immature and childish, to still be scared like that…”

“Not at all.” Fakir took a sip of his tea. “It’s more common than you think, and there’s nothing childish about having a fear of something that you can’t help. Loud noises are startling, and can be really frightening for people; it’s natural to dislike them.”

“Yeah… I guess that’s true…” Ahiru let her breath out in a sigh. “I like the rain, but not the thunder, you know?”

“Yeah. I understand that.” He took a forkful of sauerkraut and speared a slice of sausage as well before putting both in his mouth.

“For my part, I’m glad that the winds are well over.” Edel glanced at the back door. “The plants will get soaked in this deluge, but it’s nothing they cannot stand up to. If the winds were as bad as they were last month, however, there would be the danger of them getting uprooted.”

“Mmmm, yeah…” Ahiru swallowed the latest bite she’d taken. “I’m glad the weather’s milder now, it’s still pretty rainy but it doesn’t feel as bad… and hopefully that means the storm will clear in the middle of the night tonight.”

“I’m sure it will… it has the feel of a shorter, more intense storm, rather than one that lingers for days.” Edel drained the last of her tea. “The suddenness of it only supports that. I have no doubt that we will awaken to sunlight and the sound of water dripping off the roof.”

“That sounds nice.” Ahiru smiled to herself, even as she pushed her now-empty plate away. “I like those kinds of mornings… everything feels greener and fresher cause of the rain and the sunlight feels really good too. Especially now that it’s actually been warmer lately.”

“The passage of seasons is indeed a delightful thing.” Edel set her fork down. “You came to us when the world was fading away into fall, and now you see it renewed with the coming of spring.”

“Y-yeah, I… I can’t believe I’ve already been here for… oh wow, seven months…” Ahiru’s eyes widened. “It’s really been that long… where’s the time gone?”

“It passes faster than you ever think it will.” Fakir stared down at a knot in the table. “Even if it doesn’t feel like it… one day you’ll look back, the way you are now, and marvel at how it flew by.” He seemed to sigh a little.

“Too right.” Edel gave a wry laugh. “I often find cause to wonder where the years have gone, even if parts of them seem to stretch on for too long at times.” She stood up. “But before I get too introspective and bore you with the ramblings of an old lady, I think I’d like to clean up.”

“Oh! Oh yes!” Ahiru scrambled to her feet as well, and clinked her cup against her plate a little too loudly for her comfort, in her haste to gather everything up; she winced at the sound. “Sorry, I didn’t realize…”

“It’s fine.” Edel arranged their dishes in a more or less neat stack on the counter, and then began to heat some water for washing. “Fakir? What about you?”

“Huh? Oh…” Fakir seemed to shake himself out of contemplation before rising to his feet. “Yeah… sorry.” He gathered together his dirtied plate, cup, and cutlery and brought them over to join the rest. “I’ll take care of all these, you two go ahead and go.”

“Really?” Edel raised an eyebrow. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, don’t you want any help?” Ahiru’s little nose crinkled slightly in confusion. “Why would you want to do it all by yourself?”

“It’s fine.” Fakir rolled his sleeves up to his elbows. “You two had a busier day, I think, and I’d like to help out more. Don’t worry about it.”

“All right.” Edel cast him a curious glance. “The water’s heating, and you know where the soap is… if by some chance you require my assistance with anything after all, I’ll be in my bedroom, all right? Just knock first.”

“I know.” Fakir made sure his hair was tied securely; Ahiru thought back briefly, longingly, to when he’d he’d been injured and she’d gotten to touch it, to brush and tie it for him. She didn’t miss him being hurt like that, but getting to do that for him had been an unexpected and selfishly fun bonus. “But I don’t think I will.”

“Goodnight, then,” Edel said. “Assuming I don’t see you again before you go to bed.”

“Y-yeah, goodnight, Fakir!” Ahiru piped up. “A-and thank you for volunteering to do this.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Fakir shrugged. “And goodnight. To both of you.”

Ahiru waved at him, even though his back was turned, and headed back to her room. She hesitated in the doorway, however, and considered: did she want to stay here? Or go to the library like she’d originally planned to do that afternoon until Edel had unintentionally derailed it? She’d been in here all afternoon and she both needed and wanted new reading material, so the idea of spending her evening in the library did tempt her. She remained there for a few minutes, weighing the pros and cons of both options, before finally turning back and rushing off to the library.

The faded remnants of the fire Edel had had going while she wrote her letters still smoldered in the fireplace; Ahiru built them back up and lit a couple lamps before beginning to search the shelves for something, anything, new to read. One tome in particular caught her eye: _A History of Chiromancy and What It Can Tell Us About the Future_.  She pulled it off the shelf without hesitation, and also snagged a book full of legends about fairy creatures.

Instead of nestling into an armchair, however, she took the big, soft pillow from the one she usually sat in and put it on the rug next to the fireplace. She took the blanket too, and wrapped it around herself like a cape before sitting down on the pillow. A little sigh escaped her; it was so wonderfully warm down here right next to the crackling flames, and between the firelight and the lamps she’d lit she could easily see to read her book. Holding the blanket closed with one hand, Ahiru set her books down on the floor in front of her and opened up the one on palmistry first.

She’d just finished the first chapter when the sound of footsteps broke her concentration – looking up, she saw Fakir walking into the library. He halted as their eyes met. “I… sorry, did I bother you?” He took a step back. “I’ll leave if that’s the case.”

“Oh no, not at all!” Ahiru shook her head. “Don’t go, you can stay – did you need a book to read?”

“I was thinking about it.” He took a few hesitant steps forward. “I wasn’t sure… I just knew I didn’t want to stay in my room until I went to bed.”

“Yeah, me either, that’s why I came in here.” Ahiru adjusted her blanket. “You can stay in here and talk to me or just read if you want, I don’t mind… unless you’d rather be alone?”

“No… no, I…” Fakir shook his head. “I’ll – I’ll stay. Thank you. Sorry if I’m intruding.”

“Not at all, don’t worry about it.” She watched him start towards the bookcases, then apparently change his mind and head in her direction. “I told you I don’t mind, I’m always okay with talking to you. I can read any time.”

“… All right.” Fakir glanced between her and a nearby chair; after seeming to consider his options for a moment, he too grabbed a pillow and set it on the rug across from her. “It’s warmer down here,” he remarked as he sat down.

“Yeah, that’s why I did it!” Ahiru smiled. “Do you want a blanket too? You don’t want to catch cold after how you got soaked today.”

“I’m fine.” Fakir rolled his sleeves back down, obviously having forgotten to after finishing with the dishwashing. “Don’t worry about me.” His gaze strayed to the books in between them. “What were you reading? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“Oh, not at all!” Ahiru closed the palmistry book and turned both around so he could see them. “I got this one cause I wanted to read about fairy creatures, they sound really interesting and some are kind of scary, I know, but I like to learn and I want to be able to recognize any if I happen to see one, like if I’m walking in the woods and the pooka comes up or something… but I didn’t get to that one yet cause I started this one first.” She tapped the other book. “This one is about the history of palm reading, which Edel started teaching me today, so I wanted to read more about it.”

“Palm-reading, huh?” He leaned closer so he could get a better look at the cover. “Is that interesting for you?”

“Oh yes!” Ahiru nodded. “There’s not as much to it as astrology so it won’t take as long to learn, but it’s still really interesting cause all these different things about your hands can tell you stuff about yourself. And it isn’t really done to tell the future, not really, but more like… it tells you where you’ve been and what you’ve done and been through, so that you can think and reflect about things and decide where to go from there. It’s all about learning from the past, you know?”

“That sounds like a good approach, yeah.” Fakir traced his finger down the cover. “With all the mistakes we make, it’s important to be able to learn from them so we don’t repeat them.”

“That’s what Edel said, yeah.” Ahiru put the books down. “And the book she gave me had lots of ideas for suggested questions based on what the different lines on somebody’s palm says about them. A-and Edel also said that your hands change over the years, so a reading I’d get now is going to be pretty different from the one I’ll get when I’m her age, you know?”

“Makes sense.” He nodded.

“Yeah, it’s really cool, and I like that it can change like that, because you change on the inside too as time passes, so of course your hand would reflect that and make you think about how much you’ve changed and all the stuff you’ve gone through and done, and you can get a better picture of yourself for when you sit and think about it all to figure things out.” Ahiru paused to take a breath. “Oh, but… look!” She held up her hand for him to see. “What kind of hand do you think I have?”

Fakir tilted his head as he considered her hand. “… Small?”

“Besides that, silly!” She pretended to swat at him, and he laughed, making her giggle. “There’s four different basic types of hands, and they’re supposed to be the elements, you know, air, water, earth, and fire… anyway, Edel said I kind of have an earth hand, though it’s hard to tell cause they’re so little, and that they’re kind of like air ones too so she didn’t really know… hers was kind of in between too. But they both have their good points so I don’t mind being a bit of both, and she did a reading of my palm too, and… oh!” Her eyes widened. “Could – could I practice it on you? I – I won’t ask you to reveal anything personal, you don’t have to talk to me about stuff you don’t want to say out loud, but I’m really curious about your hands now after studying this, so… please?” She gave him an imploring look.

“… Sure. Why not?” Fakir glanced down at his hands. “Which one would you prefer?”

“Well, um…” Ahiru clutched the blanket a little tighter. “Probably your left? Cause the scar on your right hand might interfere with the different lines, not that it’s ugly or anything, but you want to have the clearest reading, you know?”

“Yeah, that makes sense.” Fakir extended his left hand to her, palm up. “Go ahead, then.”

“O-okay…” Ahiru took hold of his hand, trying to ignore the way her body reacted to touching him. “Let’s see…” She guided him to hold his hand up in the air facing her, so that she could get a clear look at the length of his fingers and the size and shape of his palm. He still had calluses on his fingertips, which wasn’t surprising given the work he did, but the skin on the back of his hand was smooth and soft, making her want to gently stroke and kiss it. She pushed that thought out of her head and concentrated on remembering what she’d read. “Oh… okay… so… what you have is definitely a water hand. Cause you have a long palm and long fingers, and the length of your palm is the same as the length of your fingers.” His hand looked so big compared to hers; she tried not to think about _that_ either.

“So what does that mean?”

“It means you’re…” She paused to think. “Um, I think it said you’re creative, and sympathetic… and perceptive. And that you do things quietly, and… that you can be kind of moody. Which is just what the book said, I’m not making judgments on you or anything!” She shook her head, making her cowlick bounce a little like a feather atop her head.

“It’s all right, I know.” Fakir gave her a wry, lopsided smile. “And it’s a fair assessment anyway.”

“Well, I guess if you’re okay with that, though I wasn’t going to say anything…” Ahiru returned to studying his hand; she moved it again so that she could look at his palm. “I don’t remember everything about what the um… there’re these things called mounts, on the opposite sides of your knuckles…” Her face felt hot all of a sudden. “S-so, I’m just going to skip that and read the lines on your palm, and really that’s the most commonly read thing so… so yeah.”

“Fine with me.” Fakir shifted slightly. “You know more about this than I do, so I’ll trust whatever you say.”

“W-well, I’m not an expert yet, but thank you.” Ahiru blushed and smiled. “Okay, so… well, since I’m seeing your hand upside down I think it’ll be easier to do this backwards… I don’t know if you’re supposed to but I guess since this is just practice it’ll be fine, and I can always give you a better reading when I’m more sure of myself…” She bent over his hand. “All right, this…” She traced her fingertip over a line that started just below the space between his index and middle fingers and continued down vertically over his palm. “This is the fate line. It joins up with your life line around the middle, so that means that…” She closed her eyes for a second, concentrating. “Oh yeah, it signifies a point at which your interests must be surrendered to those of others.” She tilted her head. “That sounds kind of like what you were talking about with being a knight and being willing to sacrifice stuff for people as part of your duty.”

“… Yeah. It does.” Fakir tucked a lock of dark hair behind his ear with his free hand. “What’s the next one?”

“Your life line.” Ahiru ran her finger over the one that began near his thumb, ignoring the shivers it sent through her to do so. “A lot of people think it means how long you’re going to live and that having a short life line means you’re going to die early or something and they get scared, but Edel said that’s not what it is at all, that’s just a superstition that took hold of people’s minds. What it really means is stuff having to do with your general health, and wellbeing, and life changes.”

“That makes sense.” Fakir’s shoulders relaxed. “So what kind do I have?”

“You have a circle in it.” She pointed to it. “See? That means that you were injured… and that’s pretty obvious, cause you were, just last autumn.”

“Yeah.” Fakir flexed his fingers slightly. “That one’s pretty easy.”

“I know, that’s probably kind of boring, cause it doesn’t require any thinking for you to do… I mean, to avoid more injuries like that, you just have to… keep not being a knight.” She traced her finger absentmindedly up and down his life line. “And as long as you’re really careful at the forge, you shouldn’t really get hurt there either.” Ahiru looked up at him. “You – you _are_ careful there, right?”

“Of course. Don’t worry.” He started to close his hand around her fingers, but stopped, and opened it back up. “Charon doesn’t let me do anything I haven’t received proper training for, and I pace myself so I don’t get any pain in my hand. You don’t have to worry about me.”

“Okay, good… though I will anyway.” Ahiru bent her head and peered at his palm again. She could just faintly smell the soap Edel kept in the kitchen for dishwashing, the scent still clinging to his skin. “All right, this one…” She ran her finger over another one that started near his thumb, just above his life line. “This is your head line, and it represents how you communicate and learn, and think, and stuff like that. You have multiple crosses through it, which means…” Her lower lip jutted out a little as she screwed her face up in concentration. “Oh yeah, it means momentous decisions.”

“… Yeah, I’ve certainly made some of those.” Fakir laughed, though there wasn’t a lot of mirth in it.

“No kidding. And last is…” She pointed to a line that ran horizontally across the top of his palm, beginning near his index finger. “Your heart line. Which is about emotional stability, depression, and – a-and romantic stuff.” She swallowed. Leaving this till last should’ve prepared her for it, but it really hadn’t.

“… Oh.” Fakir stared down at it. “I… that makes sense. So then… what does mine mean?”

“Yours is… it’s…” Ahiru faltered. “I can’t… I can’t tell that well… it looks like little lines crossing through, but also one of them kind of looks like a circle…” She lifted his hand closer so she could get a better look. “I can’t tell…”

“It’s probably the lighting. Don’t worry about it.” Fakir shifted his legs. “What do each of those mean?”

“Well… a circle means depression.” Ahiru frowned. “And the lines… those mean emotional trauma.” She looked up at him with concern. “You… oh no, I hope you haven’t gone through that second one especially? Oh no… I mean, you don’t have to tell me anything specific, but… just…”

“Define emotional trauma.” Fakir leaned his head down to peer at his own palm. “Be more specific.”

“Well… I don’t really know… I guess it depends on how someone would define their own experiences, I guess…” She twisted the corner of the blanket with her free hand. “I guess I just… well, I hope you haven’t been through something really really _bad_ , you know?”

“Hmmm…” Fakir stared down at their joined hands. “I guess I… well, I find it really hard to put a specific label on some of the things I’ve been through, but I suppose some things would count. Like losing my parents.”

“Oh yeah.” Ahiru fought the urge to reach out and take his other hand, and squeeze both. “That would count, yeah…”

“They…” He swallowed. “They died protecting me, from bandits who attacked when we were coming home from visiting friends in another town.” He turned his head to stare into the flames. “My father fought valiantly, but he… there were just too many of them. And my mother… they cut her down in front of me.” His voice shook slightly. “I was powerless to stop them… powerless and weak. I only lived because the knights came by before the bandits could pull me from my hiding spot in the coach and kill me too.”

“Oh…” Ahiru pressed her free hand to her mouth, tears springing to her eyes. “Oh Fakir… I’m so sorry… I didn’t mean to make you think about _that_ …”

“It’s not your fault.” He shook his head. “You couldn’t have known.”

“I – I know that, but still…” She dropped her gaze to their hands. “Did… is that what made you want to become a knight? Or part of it?”

“It sealed my decision.” She saw Fakir nod. “I’d already wanted to be one, and then that made it final. I wanted to become stronger so that the next time I wouldn’t be standing idly by while people I cared about got hurt or killed because of me. I never cared about glory in battle, I just wanted the power to protect people. I didn’t want to ever be that weak again, to have to hide behind someone else and watch them suffer and die.”

“Th-that makes sense.” Ahiru swallowed past the lump in her throat and wiped at her eyes. “And you did get stronger, you really did… and you helped _me_ that day, from other bandits. You didn’t know me or care about me then, but you saved my life… you protected me when I needed you to.”

“That’s true.” Fakir looked back down at his hand, at the line Ahiru had pointed out. “And… well, I guess the other applies as well… I _have_ been depressed before.”

“About your parents? And not being a knight?” Ahiru guessed.

“Yes…” Fakir glanced away, staring at the fire again. “Those too.”

“Those too? Was – was there something else?” Ahiru’s heart sank. “Oh no… are you okay now? You don’t have to tell me what it was, but… I hope you’re doing better now.”

“I don’t…” He hesitated. “I don’t entirely know, about all of it. There’s…” He closed his eyes for a moment. “There are still things to sort out.”

“Oh.” Ahiru looked down at the blanket she still had around her shoulders. “I – I won’t pester you then… sorry.”

“No, you didn’t… in fact, I… that is…” She heard him take a deep breath. “I… well…” He paused. “If I – if I told you something, something private and personal, it would stay between us, right?”

“Huh?” Ahiru looked up; Fakir had an expression on his face that looked like he was trying not to be nervous. “Of – of course, I’d never tell anyone anything you didn’t want me to, you know that… I mean, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, I just mean that you don’t have to be afraid I’d let it slip to anybody.”

“No, I know you wouldn’t, I just…” He let his breath out. “I don’t know. I just…” He ran his free hand over his hair. “It isn’t that I don’t want to tell you, I do, you’re probably the only person I ever would tell… it’s just hard to get the words out when you’ve kept something buried inside you for so long.”

“Take your time.” Ahiru squeezed his hand a little. “You don’t have to rush it. I understand.”

“I… thanks.” He took a deep breath and then slowly exhaled. “The thing is… I… I’m not… god, how do I even put this?” He looked lost. “I’ve never talked about it with anyone in these terms, so I don’t know how to say it, not really.” His gaze dropped to their hands. “The only way seems to be bluntness, and I don’t… I don’t know if that’s best, or if it’s going to make you uncomfortable.”

“I’d never judge you.” Ahiru shook her head. “Never ever. You can tell me anything and I won’t hate you or think you’re gross or… or whatever you’re worrying about now. Promise.” She paused. “Although… you haven’t done anything _bad_ , have you?”

“Some people would call it that.” He let out an odd sound that almost sounded like a laugh, but not quite. “And _how_ bad depends on who you ask – whether it’s only terrible to act on your feelings, or if you’re bad for having them at all.”

Ahiru frowned. “What kind of feelings? A-and I don’t think having feelings makes anyone bad, even if they’re not good feelings, everyone has to deal with negative feelings they can’t help, what matters is if you treat somebody badly or not. That’s what I think, anyway.”

“Well… then… I guess by your definition I haven’t done anything wrong.” Fakir sighed. “I don’t know how else to put this, so… I suppose I’ll try being blunt. The thing is, I…” He took another deep breath and let it out, and repeated the action before speaking again. “I’m not just… I’m not only attracted to women, but… but also to men.” His breath when he drew it was shaky this time. “I’ve… had feelings for another man.”

“Oh.” Ahiru’s eyes grew wide. “That – that’s not a terrible thing at _all_ , I don’t see anything wrong with that…”

“You don’t?” He looked up at her, his eyes wary. “I mean… not everyone does, I know that, but others do… and it’s not talked about enough for me to have ever felt safe admitting it, not when I don’t know who’s fine with it and who isn’t. I didn’t doubt you’d be accepting, but…”

“I definitely am fine with it. In fact…” Ahiru pressed her lips together. “I kind of… I’m the same way, I think? I actually… a few years ago, when I still lived in the city… I had a really big crush on this girl… but I also like men too, so… it’s not just one I like.”

“… Oh.” Fakir let his breath out as if he’d been holding it. “Then you do understand.” He closed his eyes for a moment, and she could see the relief pass over his face. “I… take it things didn’t end well with her, though?”

“No.” Ahiru shook her head. “I mean, she wasn’t awful to me about it… well, not my feelings specifically, because I never told her. But I could kind of tell she wouldn’t have approved, just from things she said.” She frowned at the memories. “And then she ended up getting married and moving away anyway, and I haven’t seen her since…”

“Did you love her?” Fakir seemed to squeeze her hand slightly.

“I don’t know. I might have. I mean…” Ahiru let out a frustrated sigh. “I mean, I don’t even know what it’s supposed to feel like, and it was a while ago so some things have faded, so… I’m just not sure.” She fidgeted. “But – but I don’t want to make this about me, not if you still want to talk about your feelings and everything… sorry.”

“It’s fine.” Fakir fell silent for a few minutes, likely to gather his thoughts, and then when he spoke again it was haltingly, as if he was still testing the waters with her. “The thing is… I… it was… it was different for me. From the way it was with you.”

Ahiru tilted her head. “Different how?”

“I didn’t fall for someone who disapproved of me being this way. In fact, he…” Fakir looked down. “He… reciprocated my feelings, at least at first. Or maybe I should say that the attraction was mutual.” He gave a hollow sort of laugh. “That’s all it ever was, on his part.”

“How do you know?” Ahiru asked.

“Because we kissed.” Fakir closed his eyes again. “More than once. So I know he was attracted to me the way I was attracted to him. But it didn’t go any deeper than that for him, because he didn’t let it.” He sighed. “He… broke things off before things went much further than kissing, saying that we needed to stop because he couldn’t afford to indulge that side of himself because of the position he was in.”

“Position?” Ahiru’s frown deepened. “What kind of position?”

“He’s… his family expected much of him.” Fakir opened his eyes and stared at the fire. “The task of carrying on the family name rested on his shoulders, so he knew he needed to marry someday and have children. And since I’m not equipped to provide him with that he couldn’t be with me, and he didn’t want to risk us falling in love. So he just… ended it.”

“Oh no…” Ahiru whispered. “Is that what you were really depressed about?”

Fakir nodded. “I couldn’t let him know that, though. I told him I understood and that I accepted it, and let him believe that that was truly the end of it, that my feelings for him hadn’t been that deep. He was adamant about that, you see – he didn’t want to carry on an affair behind the back of whoever he eventually married because that wouldn’t be fair to either of us and he didn’t want to break my heart by letting me think we had a future together, he wanted to end things before either of us got attached. And so I let him believe he had, to spare him worrying about me.”

Ahiru adjusted her blanket. “So you already loved him then?”

“I don’t know.” Fakir sighed. “My feelings were a muddle at that point, and the abrupt end to things… I can’t deny it hurt a great deal. But I don’t know if I was in love with him just yet. All I know is that… I couldn’t forget about those interludes with him. They haunted me. I’m not sure _exactly_ what I felt for him at the time of his breaking things off, but I did realize later that I loved him.” He shut his eyes once more, looking pained. “I still feel like such a fool for falling in love with him even though I knew I could never be with him the way that I so badly wanted to. But at the same time… well, it’s like you said in the bookshop that day.” He let out another hollow, mirthless laugh. “Knowing that doesn’t automatically shut off your feelings for someone.”

“… No. It doesn’t.” Under the blanket, Ahiru touched her pendant. “Um… Fakir… I…” She swallowed. “You – you don’t have to answer this if – if you’re not comfortable or you just don’t want to talk about it or… for – for whatever reason, but… I wanted to ask… um… how did… how did you know you were in love with him? I – I don’t mean to pry or anything, I just… I’ve never known what it’s supposed to feel like. Nobody’s ever told me anything helpful.”

“Hmmm…” Fakir pursed his lips. “I think there may be two reasons for that… one, it’s hard to describe, and two, it can be a bit different for everyone. But I’ll try and remember how it was for me, and I hope it’ll help you.” He looked over at her. “Are you trying to make sense of what you felt for that girl years ago?”

“… Yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “That… that would be good.”

“All right.” Fakir stared down at the rug between them, a pensive look on his face. “I think… well, I remember thinking about just how much I wanted from him. Not just kissing, or touching, or – well, not just physical things. I wanted those, yes, but beyond that, I… wanted him to look at me the way I’d see couples in love looking at each other. I wanted to be able to hold his hand, and hear him tell me he loved me. I would think about the kind of future I wanted with him, all the things we could do. Even though we never _did_ have a future.” He laughed sadly. “I wanted to wake up beside him, and see him before I went to sleep, and share meals and private moments with him. I wanted so much. And when I was with him, I felt…” He frowned. “I’m sorry, it really is hard to describe, and my experience was different from those who _can_ be with those they love.”

“It’s okay.” Ahiru tugged a little on her necklace. “Just tell me what you can, what you feel comfortable saying.”

“I want to help you, so…” He took a breath and let it out. “When I was with him, it made me happy. Even just the smallest things we did together I cherished. But it was painful, too, after having my dreams fall apart… it got to be a constant ache in my chest, in a way. It wasn’t always strong, but it was always there. I… yearned for him, for his company, and even after he told me we couldn’t be together I still… I couldn’t hate him.” His voice shook slightly. “And I thought… as long as he was happy, as long as he was in my life somehow, then that could be enough. I didn’t begrudge him what he did, I knew he had his reasons and I knew he wasn’t happy about it. He’s such a good-hearted person that he hated to hurt me, and he knew it was better to do it when he did so that I wouldn’t be as hurt as I would be if he’d left me later. He…” Fakir let out the tiniest of sighs. “He’s someone I wish I could be like, in many ways. He inspired me, and I always thought… I strove to be like him, and I wanted to do anything I could for him if he ever needed me to.”

“… Do you still love him?” Ahiru tried not to grip at the chain too tightly.

“No.” Fakir shook his head. “At least, I don’t think I do. I’ve been trying my hardest for quite some time now to get over him. It’s… I had a hard time, and I still feel confused about –” He stopped. “There are a… lot of things I have to sort through, most involving him.”

“That makes sense.” Ahiru nodded. “It can be hard to move past someone you really loved, especially if you loved them for a long time. I don’t blame you for still being confused.”

“Thanks. I knew you wouldn’t, but… thanks.” Fakir’s shoulders relaxed. “I… hope that helped you in some way.”

“It did.” Ahiru tried to smile. “Thank you, Fakir.”

“No, I didn’t… that is…” He moved his hand so that he was now holding hers, and closed his fingers around it. “Ahiru, I… you don’t know how much of a relief it is to let that out.” Fakir drew a shuddering breath. “I’ve never talked about that with _anyone_ before. He – that man – he’s the only one who’s ever known I’m like this, and even he doesn’t know about most of what I’ve told you. He _can’t_ know. So… thank you.” He squeezed her hand. “Thank you for letting me confide in you, and for treating me with kindness.”

“Of – of course!” Ahiru felt her cheeks heat up. “You’re my best friend, I’d never be mean to you, of course you can trust me… I hope I helped you too!”

“More than you know.” His voice was soft, so soft she could just barely hear him over the noise of the rain still pouring on the roof. “More than I can tell you.”

“Th-that’s good.” She smiled. “I’m glad… cause I hate to think of you suffering under the weight of all your secrets like that and having nobody to tell, I want to be able to help you if I can…”

“I know. That’s why…” He paused for a moment. “That’s why I felt like I could tell you, why I would _only_ tell you, and no one else. Because I knew you’d treat me with care. You’re the… kindest person I’ve ever met.”

“Oh… oh no, I’m not _that_ great…” Ahiru knew she must be as red as the flickering flames in the fireplace, and she would have hidden her face if it didn’t require pulling her hand out of his grasp.

“I think you are.” Fakir leaned forward as if to see her better. “You don’t give yourself enough credit, even though you should.”

“I…” Ahiru’s breath caught in her throat, and she realized that her heart was pounding. Fakir’s face was so close – almost close enough to – “You’re… that is…”

“I’m what?” Fakir frowned. “Did I say something wrong?”

“N-no!” Ahiru shook her head. “Not at all… I’m really…” She found herself leaning closer too, and her eyelids started to fall a little.

It almost looked like Fakir was also starting to close his eyes, but she would never know – a log broke in the fireplace, and up close the sound seemed even louder than it would normally. Fakir jerked, startled, and pulled back to look at what had made the noise. He let go of her hand, and frowned. “Oh… it’s…” He shook his head. “I thought something had broken. Something else, that is.”

“Y-yeah, I…” Ahiru let her breath out; she’d been holding it and she hadn’t even known till now. “That scared me too…”

“I might as well go to bed anyway.” Fakir stood and took the pillow back over to where he’d gotten it. “I think all the work at the forge is finally catching up with me.”

“… Y-yeah, me too… I did a lot of walking today.” Ahiru pressed her lips together, trying to keep her voice steady. “Go on ahead, I’ll take care of the lamps.”

“You sure?”

“Y-yeah, I’m sure.” She nodded. “You must be really tired… and I don’t mind, so… so go ahead, I don’t want to keep you up when you’d like to sleep.”

“… All right.” Fakir hesitated for a moment. “Goodnight, then, Ahiru… and thanks. For everything.”

“You’re welcome.” Ahiru gathered the blanket around herself and stood up, and then turned her back to him so she could pick up the pillow. “Goodnight.”

Somehow, she kept the first tear from falling until after she’d heard his footsteps disappear down the hall; Ahiru wiped at her cheeks with one hand while she put away the pillow and blanket and doused the lamps. She dawdled at the library door for a few minutes just to be sure, and then started walking back to her own room.

She built up a fire in her hearth when she got there, and wasted no time changing into her nightgown and crawling beneath the covers. Only then did she let herself really cry – not in loud, wailing sobs that she’d have to muffle with her pillow, but silent tears coursing down her cheeks, tiny little hiccups and gulping, hitched breaths.

Had they really been about to kiss? It had felt _so much_ like that had been on the verge of happening. And she’d wanted it. Badly. She _still_ wanted it, so much it hurt. Was this what Fakir had been talking about when he mentioned having an ache in his chest when the man he’d loved was near? It had to be.

Ahiru rolled over on her side and squeezed her eyes shut, her duck pillow clutched to herself. His words had struck a chord in her like no one else’s ever had; they’d helped her make sense of so much. She’d been in love before, yes, she knew that now – her experience with that girl had been similar enough to Fakir’s with that man that he’d confirmed it for her by telling her about what he’d been through. She didn’t have to wonder about that anymore.

But more importantly she didn’t have to wonder what her feelings for _him_ were either, not anymore. It wasn’t the way she’d expected to figure it out, and before tonight she would _never_ have thought to ask him about such matters. Somehow it had come to that, though; in some strange, cruel trick of fate, Fakir had helped her understand something she could never tell him.

She’d fallen in love with him.


	21. Chapter 21

Ahiru braced the tray against the wall as best she could before reaching out to carefully knock on the door. “Edel?”

A slight cough came first, followed by a sniff, and then the sound of someone wiping their nose. “Ahiru? Yes, please, come in.”

Taking the tray back into both hands, Ahiru eased the door open and walked into Edel’s bedroom. Edel herself sat propped up amongst pillows arranged against her headboard; she marked her place in a book and set it aside as Ahiru entered. “How are you feeling?”

“Displeased.” Edel gave her a wry smile. “I suppose it was inevitable that I would fall ill as well, but that does not make it any less frustrating to be stuck in bed like this.”

“Well, you _have_ to stay here,” Ahiru said. She made her best attempt at looking stern. “I know it must be boring and annoying for you, but you won’t get better if you’re running around and pushing yourself too much.”

“I know, I know.” Edel laughed. “I tell the same thing to stubborn patients all the time… it’s simply that following your own advice can be harder than it should be.”

“Yeah, I know.” Ahiru set the tray down on Edel’s lap, careful not to spill anything. “Anyway, here’s your lunch – I heated up some broth and added some vegetables and meat, and toasted some bread, and made tea too. Is that all right? Do you need anything else?”

“No, thank you, this will be good.” Edel picked up her spoon. “I know you probably think it doesn’t look like the most exciting meal, but for me it’s the best thing right now. I don’t tend to have much of a sense of taste when I’m ill, and if I’m presented with strong flavors it can turn my stomach very easily. You did what I asked for and I’m grateful, so don’t worry about it not being good enough.”

“O-okay.” Ahiru relaxed. “I – I mean, I wasn’t worried _that_ much, cause you _did_ say that’s what you wanted, but still… I’m glad it’s fine.”

“I _thought_ you might have been worrying yourself a little anyway. You’re too sweet for your own good sometimes.” Edel chuckled, and Ahiru blushed. “Not that that’s a bad thing or that I’m criticizing you. But yes, this is perfect.” She took a spoonful of soup and ate it. “Ah… yes. Thank you again.”

“You’re welcome!” Ahiru beamed. “Okay, then, since you don’t need anything else right now I’ll let you eat in peace… I’ll be in the kitchen if you change your mind, though!”

She left the door ajar behind her, and headed back towards the kitchen. Her stomach growled pitifully just after she left Edel’s room, and she patted it as if to say that it was all right, she’d be filling it with food soon. She had some leftover stew from yesterday to reheat for herself, as well as a nice sausage and bread, and some beets to warm too. She’d spent the morning studying and brewing a simple ointment, in between fetching things for poor sick Edel, and now it was time for a filling and well-deserved lunch. She wasn’t sure what she’d do afterwards, but she knew she’d be able to find something; lack of options wasn’t the issue, deciding which option to take was where her dilemma lay.

Those budding thoughts found themselves derailed upon return to the kitchen, however – Ahiru stopped short in the doorway as she saw Fakir there, his back to her as he set the stewpot on the stove.  “Fakir? Y-you’re home?”

“Ahiru?” He turned to see her. “Yeah, I… I thought I’d walk home for lunch to see if you needed any help with Edel, or… well, sometimes it’s nice to eat here.” He frowned. “Would you rather I went back to Charon’s?”

“N-no, that’s not what I’m saying.” Ahiru shook her head. “It’s just… I just didn’t expect it, is all. You hardly ever come home for lunch lately, you usually stay there.”

“Yeah, well…” He shrugged. “I thought it’d be a nice change, or that you might need assistance given that Edel’s sick, or… you might just not want to eat alone.” Fakir turned back to the stove, and Ahiru thought she caught a glimpse of red in his cheeks. She’d probably imagined it, though.

“Oh, well, that’s… that’s nice of you.” Ahiru took a few more steps into the kitchen, letting the door swing shut behind her. “Do you need any help there?”

“No thanks, I should be fine.” He glanced back over his shoulder. “Go ahead and sit down.”

“… All right.” Ahiru seated herself in her usual spot, and swung her legs back and forth slowly while she inspected the table’s surface. She really should’ve brought a book in, and wished she had; it would be so awkward to go get one _now_.

“How’s Edel doing, anyway?” Fakir asked a few minutes later.

“Same as this morning.” She traced her finger over the knots in the wood. “Taking her medicine and resting, and complaining about being stuck in bed.”

“That sounds about right.” Fakir laughed. “She hates being sick. You’ll have to keep an eye on her to make sure she doesn’t sneak out and try to brew something or pull weeds in the garden.”

“Yeah, I know.” Ahiru rested her chin on her hands. “I had to shoo her out of the workroom earlier.”

“Typical.” He sounded like he was rolling his eyes, but in an amused, fond way. “And you? How are you doing on your own? It’s kind of boring to have your instructor be unable to teach you, I know.”

“I guess.” Ahiru shrugged. “I can do some stuff on my own now, so it’s not so bad. I made an ointment earlier.”

“That’s good.” Fakir paused. “Hey – is everything all right? You seem a little down, is something wrong?”

“What? No.” Ahiru shook her head. “I – I’m fine, just… distracted by thinking about what I want to do after lunch.”

“Oh. All right.” She glanced over at him, and saw that he had a concerned frown on his face. “Well, that’s all right, I just… you haven’t seemed like yourself for a few days, is all.”

“It’s nothing, really.” Ahiru made herself turn to look at him and gave him a small smile she hoped was convincing. “I’ve just had a lot on my mind, and lots of stuff to do and now Edel’s sick, so… so yeah. Don’t worry about me.”

Fakir didn’t look entirely convinced, but he nodded and turned back to the stove again. “All right. I’ll try.”

They conversed little during lunch, speaking only of things without any true depth to them, such as the weather and how Edel was doing and how the only thing worse than a spring cold was a summer cold. After the meal was done they worked together to clean up, with Fakir washing the dishes and Ahiru drying.

They found themselves kind of standing there awkwardly once everything had been put away, and Ahiru broke the silence first. “Um… so… are you going back to Charon’s now?”

“Yeah.” Fakir nodded. “He should be done with lunch too by now, and I’d like to get back to work. I’ll be back in the early evening for dinner.”

“Okay.” Ahiru twisted her hands slightly. “I – I’ll walk you to the front door, then.”

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to.” Fakir looked away. “I know you have lots of stuff to do.”

“No, it’s okay, I… I still haven’t decided yet what I want to do, and it’s not like I’m on a schedule with Edel sick.” Ahiru shifted on her feet. “Come on, I’ll walk you back, and then I’ll check on Edel again.”

“… All right.”

They walked out of the kitchen together and towards the front door, Ahiru trailing slightly behind Fakir. He tried to slow his pace to hers, but every time he did she somehow managed to fall behind again, until he gave up entirely. It ended up feeling like a longer walk back than it actually was. When they got there, Ahiru stared at the wall while Fakir put his coat back on and fetched his cloak down from its peg, draping it over his arm. It was a sunny day, with no apparent threat of rain on the horizon, but after what had happened a few days ago he didn’t want to take any chances and now brought his cloak with him every time he left the house.

Fakir turned to leave, and then paused. “Just… take care of yourself too, all right? Don’t overwork yourself so much that _you_ get sick.”

“I – I know!” Ahiru bristled. “I’m not stupid, I know to pace myself!”

“I…” Fakir frowned. “I know you’re not, I just…” He sighed. “… I’ll see you later.”

He pulled the door open just as Hermia raised her fist to knock; she squawked and jumped backwards. “Oh! I – I’m sorry, I’m so sorry! I keep having bad timing like that…” She hung her head.

“It’s fine.”  Fakir shrugged. “I assume you have mail for us?”

“Yes, a few things!” She dug around in her bag and produced a handful of envelopes. “Most of these are for Lady Edel, as usual, but there’s also something special in here for you, Ahiru!”

“For – for _me?_ ” Ahiru blinked as she took the proffered stack of mail. “What could be special in there for me?”

“And not just _any_ special, it’s mail from the _palace_ special.” Hermia winked. “It should be in there somewhere, look for it if you don’t believe me!”

“Mail from the palace?” Fakir frowned. “That’s odd.”

“Not really!” Ahiru looked up from sorting through the letters to give Fakir a quick scowl. “Princess Rue likes me and she’s really nice to me, so it’s not _that_ weird.” When she finally found the right envelope, she tore it open right away and scanned the note inside. “Oh, it’s…” Her eyes lit up. “Princess Rue wants to have me over for tea on Sunday! A-and she included a piece of paper and an envelope so that I could send my reply back right away, would you mind waiting for me to write it out, Hermia?”

“Not at all!” Hermia shook her head, her eyes wide. “Tea at the palace, with the princess… how exciting! I’m envious!”

“I’m not.” Both girls turned to see a dark scowl on Fakir’s face. “It sounds suspicious to me. I don’t think you should go.”

“Well, I want to!” Ahiru frowned back at him, her lower lip jutting out in a slight pout. “So I’m sending back a note that says I can be there on Sunday!” She set the other missives down on the table, and reached for the pen that Edel kept there so she could hurriedly scribble her acceptance onto the piece of paper Rue had so kindly provided.

“Yeah, don’t listen to him, Ahiru,” Hermia said with a laugh that sounded like she was trying to keep things light and not awkward for her to be in the middle of. “Go have fun! It’s not every day you get invited to tea with royalty, and most common people don’t ever get to, so you might as well seize this chance and live it up!”

“That’s exactly why I –” Fakir began, but Ahiru interrupted him.

“Here!” She held out the now-sealed note to Hermia. She’d written Rue’s name on the envelope so it wouldn’t wind up as an unsolved mystery should Hermia get so caught up in her other deliveries that she forgot who it was meant to be for. “Thank you for waiting, please take this to the princess!”

“Of course, of course.” Hermia stuck the letter in her bag. “And if I don’t see you again before Sunday, have a good time!”

“You too! I – I mean…” Ahiru blushed. “T-take care, and have a good day!”

“Right, same to you.” Hermia turned and walked back up the path, pausing only briefly to wave to Ahiru. “Bye!”

“Bye!” Ahiru waited until Hermia was out of sight, and then whirled on Fakir. “Wh-what’s with you? Why are you acting like me getting invited to tea with Rue is a bad thing?”

“How do you know it’s a good thing?” he countered. “Have you even stopped to think about _why_ she’d do something like that out of the blue?”

“I – I just thought…” Ahiru faltered. “She – she’s been so nice to me every time we saw each other, and she wanted to tell me about her having a baby before the rest of the principality knew, just like Siegfried wanted to tell _you_ …” Her lower lip wobbled. “Do – do you really think it’s that weird that someone would want to spend time with me?”

“That’s not what I’m saying, and you know it.” Fakir scowled again. “The fact that it’s _her_ is the weird part. It’s like that courier said – it’s not every day that a commoner gets invited to tea with royalty. So why is she doing this? It makes no sense.”

“W-well, first of all – first of all, her name is Hermia, not ‘that courier’.” Ahiru glared up at him. “And I still don’t see why this wouldn’t make sense, unless you think I’m – I’m repulsive or something and nobody would want to be my friend.”

“Where on earth are you getting these ideas? I said no such thing.” Fakir folded his arms. “This is not about you, this is about her. I _know_ her, Ahiru, and I know what royals and nobles are like. They don’t do things without ulterior motives. _Ever_.”

“I know her too, and I don’t think Rue’s like that!” Ahiru shook her head. “You have her all wrong, she’s really nice and I like her a lot, and she must like me too, or she would’ve let me wait to hear about the baby in the official announcement the next day. She wouldn’t invite me to tea if she didn’t really want to see me.”

“You don’t know her as well as I do.” Fakir’s eyes narrowed. “You’ve talked to her, what? Twice? Three times? I don’t remember. I, however, got to know her a bit when I was still a knight. There _has_ to be some underlying reason for this.”

“But _why?_ ” Ahiru’s voice shook slightly. “See, that’s why it sounds like you’re saying something’s wrong with me… because you don’t seem able to accept that she’d want to see me without any ulterior motive or something.”

“Ahiru, that’s not… I’m not saying that at _all_. Stop that.” His jaw clenched. “Like I said already, this is about her, and I know what royals and nobles are like. They really _don’t_ invite commoners to have tea with them, they stick to their own kind, unless there’s something they want from the commoner. It’d be terrible if you got caught up in some royal intrigue.”

“That – that’s not going to happen!” Ahiru stared at him. “What a silly idea! I told you, she’s inviting me cause she likes me! What could she even want from me? And – and anyway, not all royals and nobles are like that, didn’t you tell me all that good stuff about Prince Siegfried and how you’re close friends and all? How can you say that about him?”

“I’m not.” Fakir’s expression darkened further. “He’s an exception. He’s not like the others I met at court.”

“Okay, I can see that, but… but I think Rue is an exception too!” Ahiru folded her arms as well, mirroring his stance. “I really do! You’re being weird and suspicious over nothing, and it really does sound like you’re saying something negative about me, whether you mean to or not!”

“If you’d listen to what I’m saying, you’d realize I’m not. But I guess there’s no talking you out of this now that it’s fixed in your head.” Fakir glared down at her. “I don’t like this. And you should be more cautious, instead of just blindly trusting people. I don’t think it’s a good idea to go.”

“Well, I – I don’t care what you think!” Ahiru stamped her foot on the floor. “And I’m going whether you like it or not!”

“I…” Fakir’s expression changed for a moment, into something she wasn’t sure how to interpret, but then resumed being a scowl. “Fine. I have to go now anyway, I’m late and Charon will be wondering where I am.” He stormed through the still open door. “Later.” He slammed it shut behind him before Ahiru could do anything.

“Bleeeeeeh…” Ahiru stuck her tongue out and glared at the door, as if it too had offended her. She waited a minute or two to be sure he’d walked far enough away, and then opened it back up just so she could slam it again. No _way_ was Fakir taking that minor bit of satisfaction away from her!

After a few more minutes spent in the front hall to normalize her breathing and calm down a little Ahiru picked up the letters addressed to Edel and headed down the hall to check on her. It was so quiet that she feared for a second that Edel had snuck out again, but no – she was fast asleep on pillows she’d laid back down flat, the blanket pulled up to her chin as she softly snored and the tray pushed down to the bottom corner of the bed. Ahiru left the stack of mail on her bedside table, and then tiptoed out and went back to her own room.

Once there she flung herself onto her bed and hugged her duck pillow as she glared up at the ceiling. Fakir really did have some nerve, trying to boss her around like that and acting like there was no _possible_ way she could interpret his weirdness as thinking it was strange for someone to want to spend time with her. He probably _did_ mean it that way and was trying to hide it behind a pretend concern about Rue’s motives. True, there didn’t seem to be any love lost between the two of them, but still – that just made it a convenient and believable excuse. The urge to throw something arose sharply in her, but Ahiru resisted and instead hugged her duck pillow tighter. Even as angry as she was right now she would never have the heart to throw it, despite that it wouldn’t break, and would be upset and apologetic afterwards.

Tears began to slip down her cheeks; she wasn’t sure if it was at the thought of hurting her pillow like that or due to the anger she felt towards Fakir . Maybe both? That would make sense. How could he act that way? Why hadn’t he seemed to care more that she was getting upset and feeling like he was implying bad things about her? Did he really think she was so awful and repulsive that no one would want to spend time with her without wanting something besides her company? Ahiru squeezed her eyes shut, forcing more tears out of them.

The worst part was, he probably really _did_ see wanting to spend time with her as something strange and unfathomable. Yes, he’d denied it, but why should she believe him? What reason was there? Especially after what had happened the other night. A small sob escaped her at the memory. She’d felt so close to him that night after all that they’d shared, and they’d held hands for _so long_ , and it had been so wonderful… until he’d pulled away. She’d been _so_ sure that they were about to kiss, and she’d wanted it so badly, she’d _been_ wanting it for ages, but nothing had happened in the end. It made her wonder: had they really been on the verge of kissing? Or had it been her imagination, borne of her own concealed desires?

 _Probably your imagination,_ a nasty little voice seemed to say. _Why would someone like him want to kiss **you**? You know very well that you’re not pretty or smart enough, he could never want you or love you. Even if he did realize what he was doing, he pulled back because he came to his senses. And he probably doesn’t even remember it now, because you’re so unimportant. He doesn’t really care about you. How could he?_

Another sob slipped out, and Ahiru rolled over on her side and curled up into a ball. No one was close enough to hear her, but she muffled the noise in her duck pillow anyway as she cried. It was true. It made sense. Fakir didn’t want her, so he didn’t understand how anyone else could want to be around her either, couldn’t imagine anyone actually enjoying her company. What was there to enjoy, anyway? If only he’d just be honest instead of trying to lie about it. The lies made it worse, as if she was being pitied. How pathetic she was.

Ahiru let herself cry until she had no more tears left, and after wiping the last of them away she sat up and knelt with her elbows on the sill, staring out at the forest. As she tried to find something to focus on, a sudden thought occurred to her: how could she go to tea with the princess empty-handed? That would be rude, wouldn’t it? No, she definitely had to get something. Maybe she’d stop by the market on Saturday and pick something up; Edel might not be well enough to go with her, but she’d lived here long enough by now to be confident in her ability to walk there by herself, buy something, and get home safely. She certainly didn’t need _Fakir_ to go with her. A mutinous pout appeared on her face as she thought of him again, and she quickly pushed him out of her mind. She had no desire to think about him right now.

Ahiru spent the rest of the afternoon trying out various tasks to take her mind off her personal problems; she managed to do a little weeding, some storage of dried flowers and herbs, and read a chapter in the latest one assigned by Mr. Katz. That was a relief to do, for now she was all done and ready to meet with him in a couple days. Although she _would_ have to go with – no, no, she wasn’t going to think about him right now, she reminded herself as the thought drifted into her head. She set aside her notes and headed to the sitting room to do some sweeping and dusting, with a plan to check on Edel again after she was done with that.

Edel was awake and reading by the time Ahiru finished cleaning the sitting room, and smiled when she saw her peeking her head around the door. “Hello, Ahiru.”

“Hi, Edel.” Ahiru walked in. “I’ll take the tray now, sorry… you were asleep before and I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“That’s quite all right.” She yawned. “Thank you for letting me sleep, though, I think it did me some good.”

“I’m glad.” Ahiru smiled. “And it’s almost dinner time, are you hungry? I can clean these dishes up and then bring you food, or the other way around if you’re _really_ hungry, it’s up to you…”

Edel shook her head. “Go ahead and clean them first, I can wait. It’s kind of you to offer, though.”

“You’re welcome.” Ahiru picked up the tray. “Okay, I’ll go wash these and then I’ll be right back with your dinner!”

She returned to the kitchen as fast as she thought safe, given that she was carrying a tray laden with some very fragile dishes, and heated up water for cleaning. Once she’d washed and dried and put them all away she fetched out a few things for dinner, and arranged the ones that would be gentlest to Edel’s stomach on the tray, along with a cup of some hot tisane she’d just brewed, a blend specially formulated by Edel herself to help relieve the symptoms of a cold.

Fakir still wasn’t back by the time she’d finished making and delivering Edel’s dinner to her, but Ahiru didn’t care about waiting for him, and she _definitely_ wasn’t worried at him being late. Certainly not. She gave the chair he always sat in a dirty look, and then set about preparing a nice little dinner spread on the table. That she was preparing enough for two rather than one went either unnoticed or ignored. She brewed a fresh batch of a different tisane, and sat down to enjoy it with her food after lighting a lamp. She’d only just barely swallowed her first sip when Fakir finally walked in; their eyes met, and then they both swiftly looked away, Ahiru down at her food and Fakir at the stove. He headed over to the kettle without a word, and poured himself some tisane before fetching down a plate and getting out his own cutlery.

They went the entirety of the meal without saying anything to each other – Ahiru didn’t want to be the first to speak, and evidently Fakir didn’t either. They didn’t even look at each other. Ahiru gripped her cup and silverware rather harder than she needed to, so much so that she was surprised to see no bending or dents in any of it when she was done eating.

Just as Ahiru was about to leave the kitchen, Fakir finally broke the silence. “Ahiru? I… I’m sorry.”

She stopped at the sound of his voice but didn’t turn around. “For what?”

“For earlier.” He sighed. “It was wrong of me to act that way. I shouldn’t interfere. It’s just…” He paused, and his voice dropped. “I just… worry about you, is all, and I really don’t want to see you get caught up in any messy royal intrigues. I want you to be able to… to live peacefully, normally… happily. I don’t want anything to happen to you… I don’t want anyone to hurt you.”

Now Ahiru turned. “ _You_ hurt me. With what you said and how you acted about it.”

“I know.” Guilt and shame flashed in his eyes. “And I’m sorry. I really am. It doesn’t matter that I didn’t mean to make you think that I was saying something bad about you, the fact is that I did, and I should’ve realized that and stopped.” Fakir looked down at the floor. “I’m sorry.”

“… It’s okay.” Ahiru let her breath out. “It really is!” she added, as he looked back up at her and opened his mouth to protest. “I understand, and I know you weren’t trying to be mean, you were just looking out for me and it came out all wrong… I know you care about me and you wouldn’t try to hurt me, and that makes a difference, a-and so does that you’re apologizing. If you weren’t sorry at all that’d be bad, but you are, so… so I forgive you.”

“I… no, I won’t say thank you.” Fakir shook his head. “Because that sounds like I was asking for your forgiveness, and I wasn’t. I just wanted you to have a genuine apology.”

“I know.” Ahiru managed a sad little smile. “I know you’re not like that, I know you just wanted to do that for me… and that’s part of why I can forgive you so easily.”

“You’re too kind.” Fakir sighed again. “Anyway, that’s… go ahead and go, I don’t want to keep you.”

“No, it’s okay.” Ahiru shook her head. “I actually… can I ask you for a favor?”

“Yeah, of course.” Fakir tilted his head slightly. “What do you need?”

“Well, I might not need it depending on how Edel feels, but… on Saturday, I’m going to go to the market so I can buy something for Rue, to take to tea.” Her stomach squirmed a little at the mention of the contentious invitation. “So, um… if Edel’s not feeling better, would you mind staying here with her so that she’s not all alone?”

“Sure, but…” Fakir’s brows drew together in a frown. “Are you sure? About going to the market by yourself? I’ll go with you if you’d rather not go alone.”

“Nope, I can go alone.” Ahiru shook her head again. “Edel not being alone at home while she’s sick is more important, and I know my way there, and besides… it’s like you said once, you won’t always be around to help me with stuff.”

Fakir’s expression didn’t change, but his shoulders slumped slightly. “… True.” He brushed some hair out of his face. “Fine. I’ll… stay here if I need to.”

“Thank you.” Ahiru nodded to him and smiled a little. “I’m going to my room now, then, so… goodnight, Fakir!”

“Yeah.” He nodded back at her. “Goodnight.”

Ahiru lit her lamp and made a small fire in her hearth when she got back to her room; it was still chilly enough at night to warrant one. After changing into her nightgown and climbing under the covers she hugged her duck pillow again, burying her face in it and sighing deeply.

How stupid she was. How really really _stupid_. How could she think Fakir didn’t care about her? He’d made it obvious on so many occasions up to now that he did, and flat out told her that he considered her his friend and that he trusted her more than anyone. He wouldn’t have told someone he didn’t trust completely and care deeply about that he’d had feelings for and a brief relationship with another man. How could she think after that that he didn’t care about her and didn’t like having her around? That didn’t make any sense. But she’d let herself think that way anyway. Why?

The answer was a shameful one: she’d felt rejected by him when they hadn’t kissed, and so she’d assumed that he didn’t want anything to do with her in any way. It had stung so badly that she’d let that hurt combine with her already present insecurities and overwhelm her, and it had caused her to think and feel ridiculous things that had never been true. Fakir didn’t love her or want to be with her the way she loved him and wanted to be with him, that much was true. But it was a mistake to think that that meant he didn’t want her in his life at all. He very clearly valued her rather a lot, and she’d let herself forget that in her pain. How awful of her to do! It wasn’t like she felt entitled to his affections, she really didn’t, and she honestly was grateful for his friendship, it wasn’t a second choice or anything like that. It probably wasn’t her fault that her bad feelings had gotten the best of her, but it didn’t make her feel any less ashamed of herself. Fakir deserved better than to be thought of like that, and if there were a way to apologize to him without revealing her love for him she would. As it was, however, she would just have to work harder at not being so awkward around him now, and refrain from letting her hurt make her think the worst of him. That would have to be enough. She nodded to herself as if to seal her vow, and then read her “for fun” book until her eyes started to fall, at which point she put it away and doused the lamp.

Ahiru spent the next couple of days looking after Edel and trying her best to do as much work as she could without overdoing it. She and Fakir would have cancelled their lesson with Mr. Katz so that they could stay home with her, but Ebine stopped by to say that she would spend the afternoon with Edel while they went to their tutoring. Mr. Katz sent them home at the end of the session with well-wishes for Edel’s health, which they relayed to her when they got back.

Saturday morning dawned crisp and cool and partly cloudy; Ahiru eyed the sky nervously when she opened her window and decided that she would emulate Fakir and bring her cloak with her when she headed to the market. She dressed herself in a leisurely fashion, and put some coins into her bag for later before going to the kitchen.

To her surprise she found Edel sitting at the table, still looking slightly pale and wan, but much better than she had on Wednesday when the cold had been at its worst. “Morning, Edel,” she greeted her as she sank into her chair. At the stove, Fakir was stirring something. “How are you feeling?”

“Better. Mostly.” Edel sipped her tea. “I’m returning to bed after this, though, don’t worry. I have a slight headache and I’d rather take a bit of medicine for it and rest than try to do anything that might make it worse.”

“That’s oddly sensible of you.” Fakir set a bowl of hot cereal in front of Edel, and one at Ahiru’s spot too.

“Hush,” Edel said with a laugh. “Although I do concede your point.” She sighed. “I’m afraid you know me too well after all these years.”

“Yeah, I guess so.” Fakir sat down in his usual spot after getting tea for Ahiru and himself, as well as his own bowl of cereal. “I warned Ahiru a few days ago about making sure you didn’t sneak out to try and work on things.” He dipped a spoon into the honey jar.

Ahiru giggled. “And I _did_ have to! Cause you tried it.”

“Guilty as charged.” Edel laughed again. “You must understand, witches and physicians are the worst patients, because we feel remiss in our duties and unable to simply lay about all day not helping others. Someday you’ll be the same, Ahiru.”

“I don’t know.” Fakir sipped his now sufficiently sweetened tea. “I can see her already being like that. Perhaps even more stubborn than you.”

“Oh, like _you’re_ never stubborn.” Ahiru pretended to pout at him, and he laughed.

“Not like you. And besides,” he added, as she started to make another face at him, “That just means you’re a good witch. It’s bad for your own well-being, but it speaks to how good a person you are.”

“Oh… no… I…” Ahiru blushed, and pretended to be very interested in her food. “I – I’m not even a real witch yet…”

“You’re getting there, though.” Edel buttered a slice of bread and spread some jam on it. “And as I’ve told you before, you have everything it takes for the job. Fakir is right.” She paused. “Which, I know, is annoying when it happens, but luckily it doesn’t happen that often, and in this instance is actually a good thing.”

“Hmph.” Ahiru looked up in time to see Fakir scowl at Edel, though the amusement in his eyes mitigated the impact it would have had otherwise. “Another of your backhanded compliments, but I suppose I’ll take it.”

Edel smiled over her teacup. “Very wise.”

After breakfast was done Edel tried to insist on helping with the dishes, resulting in Ahiru shooing her back to her room with a dose of medicine for her headache. She and Fakir then worked together to wash and dry everything. As was the habit they’d fallen into, Fakir washed while Ahiru dried, and then they collaborated on putting things away. More often than not, though, he ended up doing most of that as Ahiru wasn’t tall enough to reach a lot of the cupboards.

“Are you still going to the market today?” Fakir asked as he returned the teacups to their shelf.

“Yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “Probably right after we’re done here… it’s kind of cloudy, so if it’s going to rain I want to get everything done quickly and then come home. But don’t worry, I’m going to take my cloak with me just in case, so even if it does start raining on the way home or something I’ll be prepared.”

“All right.” Fakir frowned. “And… you’re sure you want to go alone? Edel seems like she’s recovered enough to be on her own, if you want me to come with you.”

“No, thank you, that’s okay.” Ahiru shook her head. “I really appreciate it, and it’s not that I don’t enjoy going places with you, it’s just… I’d feel bad leaving Edel all by herself when she’s still not back to normal, you know? Somebody should be here to get stuff for her if she needs it, and keep her from trying to overwork herself and make herself worse.”

“Yeah, I know.” Fakir took a plate and set it where it belonged. “Just… just be careful, all right? Watch where you’re going and don’t get careless.”

“I won’t. Don’t worry.” Ahiru reached over and squeezed his arm. “I’ll be fine, and I’ll be back before you know it. Okay?”

“All right.” Fakir nodded. “See you later, then.”

“At lunch, if not before – I promise!” Ahiru patted his arm, and then headed out of the kitchen so she could leave.

Birdsong and warmer air greeted her when she got outside; the sun had parted the clouds a little more while she ate breakfast, and she could feel its warmth soaking into her as she walked. Ahiru carried her cloak in a small basket on her arm, her coins jangling slightly where they sat atop it. Maybe there wasn’t a danger of rain after all – that was a pleasant thought. She liked rain, and recognized its importance, but she didn’t particularly care to have another thunderstorm open up on her as she tried to buy a present for Rue. And hopefully the weather would stay nice tomorrow as well, it would be a dreadful shame to show up at the castle looking soaked and bedraggled.

As Ahiru walked up to her stall Freya’s bored expression changed to one of happiness, her eyes lighting up when she spotted her. “Ahiru! Hello!” She waved to her. “What a nice surprise!”

“Hi, Freya!” Ahiru beamed at her. “It’s good to see you too. How are you doing?”

“I’m doing well, thank you.” She adjusted her glasses so that they were less crooked on her nose. “How’s Edel? I heard she has a cold?”

“Yeah, but she’s getting better.” Ahiru nodded. “A-and I’m doing good too, thank you for asking. I’m actually here cause of something exciting!”

“Really?” Freya raised an eyebrow. “Are you courting someone, then? Or hoping for them to court you, and working a spell to attract their attention?”

“Wh-what? N-no!” Ahiru shook her head vigorously, making her cowlick flutter back and forth. “Nothing like that… I got invited to the castle by Princess Rue, to have tea tomorrow.”

“The _princess?_ ” Freya’s eyes went wide. “Oh my… I didn’t realize you knew her well enough to get an invitation like _that_ …”

“W-well, sort of?” Ahiru wrung her hands a little. “I mean, we’ve only really talked a few times, but she was really nice to me, and she seemed to really like me, so I guess she wants to talk to me again or see how I’m doing or something… a-and anyway, to thank her for inviting me, I wanted to buy some flowers for her, I thought that’d be nice.”

“That _is_ a lovely gesture.” Freya smiled. “Oh, I’m happy for you, Ahiru – I’d love to see the inside of the palace.” She sighed wistfully. “I’ve never been, but if the inside is as grand as the outside then it _must_ be spectacular…”

“It is!” Ahiru nodded. “I got to go inside for the wedding, actually, I got invited cause Princess Rue was having Edel do special spells and wards in preparation, and since I’m her apprentice I got to go along and help… and I kind of went inside before that, sort of… cause I made a present for Fakir for saving my life and I delivered it to him, but I don’t really count that cause I didn’t see the inside really, just the outside parts…”

“Ah, the wedding.” Freya sighed again. “That sounded like quite an event. I almost wish I could’ve attended too.”

“Almost?” Ahiru tilted her head. “Why almost?”

“Well, it’s… oh, it’s a bit embarrassing to admit, but…” Freya gave her a sheepish smile. “I used to have the most _terrible_ crush on Prince Siegfried, you see…”

“Oh no, I don’t think that’s embarrassing at all.” Ahiru shook her head. “Lots of people get crushes, you know? And I can see why you’d have one on him, he _is_ handsome, and he seems nice.” He wasn’t as handsome as Fakir, of course, but she could understand being attracted to the prince, especially if all the glowing things Fakir had said about him were true.

“That’s true, I suppose, but… well… seeing him get married would have been very awkward all the same. Especially because I’d hoped to marry him myself.” Freya blushed.

“You did?” Ahiru stepped closer to let someone else pass by behind her. “Did he court you or something?”

“No, he didn’t. I had met him once, briefly, when he came to buy some flowers, but our acquaintance never went deeper than that. That’s not why I had hopes, though, I’m not _that_ silly,” Freya added hastily. “It’s because before he met Princess Rue there was talk of having a ball specifically for him to choose a bride. I’m no noble, I know, but I’d hoped it would be one of those ‘all eligible ladies in the land’ sort of affairs, you know?”

“Yeah, that makes sense.” Ahiru nodded. “I’ve heard of that kind of thing happening.”

“Then you understand.” Freya sighed as if relieved. “My mother tried to discourage me from thinking it’d be so, saying it was probably just rumor – I think she wanted me to avoid getting my hopes up and being hurt and disappointed when it turned out otherwise. She meant well, I know… but it didn’t stop me fantasizing about wearing a beautiful gown and impressing the prince with my dancing so much that he declared me the winner and proposed marriage to me.” She blushed. “See? That _is_ embarrassing.”

“Maybe for you, but I don’t see anything silly about it.” Ahiru squeezed her hand. “It’s okay to have dreams and fantasies like that, it doesn’t make you silly or bad. And who knows, you might have gotten to go!”

“You’re too kind.” Freya smiled. “But alas, we’ll never know if I had a chance of being able to attend such a thing, for it was never held. He ended up meeting Princess Rue, on a trip abroad, I… think?” She frowned. “I can’t remember what the story was. But anyway, he met her, and they fell in love, and… well, now they’re married and expecting a child.” She shrugged. “That put an end to all those dreams of dancing the night away with him and winning his love through that.”

“Awwww, I’m sorry.” Ahiru took her hand again and squeezed it.

“It’s okay. Really, it is.” Freya laughed. “It was just a silly crush anyway, and I’m over it now. And I certainly don’t begrudge either of them their happiness, I’m happy for them both. I haven’t gotten to meet Princess Rue, but she seems lovely.”

“She is, I really like her!” Ahiru nodded. “I’m really looking forward to having tea with her tomorrow.”

“Then I’m happy for you as well.” Freya smiled. “I’ll get that bouquet ready for you now. I’m flattered you wanted to buy from me, honestly.”

“Of course!” Ahiru beamed at her. “Your flowers are the best, after all!”

“Oh, Ahiru, once again you’re too kind.” Freya blushed. “I’ll get to work now, so if you need to say something just touch my arm.”

“Okay.”

Ahiru waited for Freya to arrange a lovely, multicolored bouquet of flowers, and then paid her before bidding her goodbye and heading home. As she’d promised, she was home in time for lunch; she ate in the kitchen with Fakir and Edel, who was feeling better by now thanks to the medicine and the lie-down that she’d had that morning. Ahiru even agreed to let her help her with some herb and flower storage in the basement, at least for a little while, and they spent part of the afternoon doing that before Edel got shooed back to her room to read. She joined them again for dinner, though, and seemed very optimistic that she’d be able to resume teaching Ahiru on Monday.

Ahiru’s tea with Rue was scheduled for mid-afternoon on Sunday; she spent the morning trying to relax in various ways. She first went to the library to read, but ended up doing some cleaning instead when she noticed dust on the mantle and bookshelves. After that she tried taking a walk outside through the garden and along the edge of the forest, and that seemed to help a bit more. She picked some mushrooms and wildflowers that she and Edel used in various medicines and brews, using part of the skirt of her dress to hold them. When she could carry no more she walked back to the house as carefully as she could– though she did have to stop a few times to retrieve one or two that dropped – and somehow got inside the back door without spilling everything she’d collected. She dumped them all on the kitchen table while Fakir cooked lunch, and then reloaded them into a basket so she’d have an easier time carrying them down the basement stairs. She found Edel down there already, doing some inventory and looking much more like her usual self. They talked about what she’d retrieved and how Edel’s health was until Fakir called them up for lunch, temporarily interrupting their conversation.

Fakir volunteered to do the dishes after lunch over Ahiru’s protests, and she reluctantly returned to her room to try and fill the time until she had to leave. She sat on her bed for part of it, swinging her legs back and forth and wringing her hands, and alternated that with sitting at her table and doing much the same things. She also sat on her bed and stared out the window, and occasionally got up to pace around her room. When the clock informed her that it was finally time to leave she flew around the room getting everything she’d need, particularly the bouquet of flowers from Freya, and then raced down the hall to the front door.

She’d nearly finished putting her coat and gloves on and was about to take her cloak down too when Fakir showed up. “Hey. You’re going now?”

“Um, yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “I – I’ll be back for dinner, though, I don’t think it’ll take _that_ long.”

“Oh… well… all right.” He stood there while she folded her cloak and draped it over her arm, and when she turned away to get the flowers and leave he started forward and caught her hand. “Wait, Ahiru – I…” He took a deep breath. “I’m sorry.”

Ahiru turned to look at him, tilting her head slightly. “For – for what?”

“For what I said the other day. That was…” He shook his head. “I want you to have a good time today. I mean it. It was wrong of me to do what I did – to let my personal feelings towards her make me act like that and cause you hurt. I…” He looked away, his face a little red. “I hope I haven’t spoiled this for you… I know you were excited to get the letter…”

“Oh… Fakir…” Her lower lip wobbling, Ahiru pulled her hand out of his grasp and flung her arms around him. “It’s okay… it really is… a-and I’m sorry too.”

“Idiot. You have nothing to apologize for.” After a moment, Fakir laid his hands on the back of her shoulders, gingerly it felt like, and a bit awkwardly too – as if he didn’t really know how to return someone’s hug. “I was the one who was a jerk to you.”

“Well, I… I wasn’t very nice to you either, and it takes two to fight, you know…” Ahiru tried to swallow down the lump in her throat, and her eyes burned with tears she was attempting to hold back.

“You were just reacting to what I said, and you had every right to be angry at me.” Fakir sighed. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

 _But I thought mean things about you cause I was sad!_ Ahiru bit down on her tongue to avoid blurting that out. “I think I could’ve said stuff better, though…” She leaned her cheek against his chest and sighed. “How come you don’t like Rue, anyway?”

“I… well…” Fakir hesitated for several seconds. “I guess… some people are just bound to clash, I suppose? We just… never got along for some reason, it must be something to do with our personalities. I – I’m sure you’ve had people in your life too that you just never got along with for reasons you couldn’t really explain, people who just rubbed you the wrong way.”

“That’s true.” Ahiru pulled back to look at him; Fakir held onto her shoulders for a second before releasing her and letting his hands fall awkwardly to his sides. “Anyway, I should go now… I don’t want to be late. But, but please –” She took both his hands in hers and squeezed them. “Don’t feel bad, okay? It’s really all right and I forgive you, so try not to feel bad even though I know you and I know you will for a while… just accept that I’m okay and we’re okay and that I don’t want you to beat yourself up for it, all right?”

“… All right.” Fakir nodded. “I’ll… try. I promise. And… have a good time today, and be careful walking there and back.”

“Of course!” Ahiru nodded, and let go of his hands so she could pick up the bouquet. “And thank you, a-and bye, Fakir! See you later!”

“Later.” He followed her to the door, and waved back at her when she waved at him over her shoulder, even managing a small smile before closing the front door.

Once she was out of sight and had heard the door close, Ahiru pressed her free hand to her mouth and made a small whimpering sound as she tried not to cry. She really didn’t want to show up to tea sniffling and weeping, with a runny nose and puffy, red-rimmed eyes, but it wasn’t going to be easy to avoid that now, not after that conversation with Fakir. Oh, how _could_ she have let herself think such things about him? She’d already chastised herself plenty for it over the past few days, and now she felt even worse. She’d been depressed and unhappy and feeling rejected by him, yes, but was that any excuse for thinking he didn’t care about her at all and found her repulsive? Did it justify it at all? To be fair, it was what she always feared others thought, and she’d been rejected and criticized by so many that it was something she pretty much just assumed by now. That had to be taken into account, and she knew she couldn’t control her insecurities and fears so easily. But all the same it was hard to help feeling guilty for even temporarily believing those things of _Fakir_ , of all people. She loved him, and he’d shown her and told her many times over that he cared about her and trusted her and enjoyed her company… how could she think otherwise for even a little while? That made her the worst person in the world, it had to.

 _No. Stop that,_ she told herself sternly. _You can’t help feeling afraid and insecure, you know that, and he’d tell you the same thing. He’d never want you to be cruel to yourself just because you were feeling so bad about yourself that you thought someone else didn’t care about you. Just remember that he’s your friend, and learn from this for the next time you’re feeling like that._

That was what she’d tell someone else, wasn’t it? Edel’s words from the other day came rushing back to her and she nodded, her little face taking on a determined expression. Taking your own advice was one of the hardest things, yes, but she would try, she really would, just like Fakir was trying right now to not feel so awful about his own bad behavior. She would probably always experience bad times and fears and feelings of inadequacy, of being unwanted. All sorts of insecurities. And when that happened she would just have to try and take care of herself, to take a deep breath and a step back and remind herself that no matter what she felt or feared she _did_ have people that cared about her and she _was_ wanted, that even if it did feel hard to believe it really was true. It was the only thing she could do and she owed it to herself to try, because she really did need to look after herself and she knew that people like Fakir and Edel would tell her the same thing.

Her resolve set, Ahiru continued her walk to the castle in a brighter mood. Some of her tears did end up being shed along the way, but they ended up being more of a release of tension than anything else, and she felt better after letting them out. She felt able to breathe more easily, for one thing, and by the time she got to the palace she was a little bit more ready to go inside and see Rue, and more than prepared to have a good time.

She halted at the gates, shrinking a little under the gazes of the guards, and swallowed. “U-um, hi… I’m…” She dug into her coat pocket for Rue’s note, and pulled it out with trembling fingers. “I’m here to – to see the princess, she invited me for tea today. See?” She held the invitation out to them, privately marveling at how some people got to be so tall. Was it some sort of secret special diet that let them grow so much? She felt like an ant in comparison. “A-and the flowers are a present for her, I can bring them in, right?”

“Hmmm…” One of the guards took the note from her, and scanned it. “Yeah, this is the princess’ writing all right.” He handed it back. “Come on in, and yeah, the flowers are fine.”

“Thank you!” Ahiru took the paper back and curtsied,  and then hurried past them in case they changed their minds. The courtyard was bustling with people, but noticeably less so than it had been the last two times she’d been here. Which made sense – there wasn’t a wedding or other grand event coming up that she knew of. And given that Rue was getting on in her pregnancy she couldn’t imagine them having lots of balls and parties anyway. Or whatever it was the nobility got up to with the loads of free time they had; she really didn’t know that much about their habits beyond her exposure to people like the Autenbergs, and they hadn’t been members of a royal court. Not to mention that trends seemed to differ from place to place, so whatever courtiers in Schwangau did she was blissfully oblivious to it.

Ahiru made it as far as just inside the doors of the castle itself before she stopped short: what was she was meant to do from here? Where she was supposed to go? Panic bubbled up in her and she swallowed, feeling her stomach begin to churn. Had Rue given her instructions that she’d somehow skimmed over? She fumbled with the note again, and reread it three more times before accepting that nothing had been relayed to her of what she was supposed to do upon arrival at the castle. Rue had either forgotten to, or had assumed that Ahiru somehow already knew what to do and where to go.

Well. There was nothing for it. Ahiru took a deep breath, and folded the sheet of paper up before returning it to her pocket. She’d have to ask someone, there was no way around it. She hated to interrupt someone trying to do their job, but if she didn’t want to run off home and stand up the princess of Schwangau then she’d just have to suck it up and do it. Setting her face into another determined expression, she marched forward with every intention of asking someone where she needed to go.

The choice turned out to be easier than she’d expected it to be: in the midst of all the other people walking briskly by on their way to or from someplace else in the palace, a maid lingered by the main staircase, looking bored. Ahiru dodged around everyone passing through, and went up to the maid. “Um, hi, excuse me… do you think you could help me?”

“Hmmm?” The maid glanced down at her. “Oh, yes, sorry – what do you need? I have to stay here for now, but if you have a question or need directions I can help.”

“W-well, I…” Ahiru retrieved the invitation yet again. “I – I was invited to tea by the princess, but she didn’t say where I was supposed to go or what I was supposed to do, so I was hoping you knew and could tell me where to go…”

“Oh! Does that make you Miss Ahiru, then?” Relief shone on her face. “I’m supposed to be waiting here for you, to escort you to Princess Rue’s private sitting room… right this way, please!”

“Oh! Okay, thank you!” Ahiru let out a relieved sigh of her own and followed the maid. “I – I didn’t know what to do and I felt so lost… thank you…”

“No need to thank me, I’m just doing my job.” She led Ahiru up the stairs to the second floor and down a long corridor. “It’s just a little further. Also, the princess instructed me that no one was to wait inside or outside the room while you have tea, but if you’d like I can wait at the end of the hall to escort you back. Would you like me to?”

“Oh no, thank you, I should be fine.” Ahiru shook her head. “It’s not that hard to get to, it seems like, or to get back from… but thank you anyway!”

“You’re welcome.” She halted in front of a set of double doors near the end and knocked on them. “Your Highness?”

“Yes?” Rue’s voice called out from within the room. “What is it?”

“Your guest is here for tea. Shall I show her in?”

“Yes, of course, right away.”

“As you command, my lady.”

The maid opened the doors and led Ahiru into a lovely, elegant room tastefully furnished in shades of blue and white. A cozy fire crackled in the fireplace, beneath a mantel lined – but not crowded – with several expensive-looking objects, such as a glimmering crystal sculpture of a ballerina posing with a swan, and a wooden clock with gold trim, ticking quietly away. Rue herself, clad in a white and gold gown and more visibly pregnant than the last time Ahiru had seen her, sat on one of the richly upholstered sofas. Two of them had been set on either side of a long, low, narrow table that bore a tea pot and a multi-tiered cake stand laden with various baked goods, and behind the one Rue occupied a tall, wide window took up much of the back wall, offering a good view of the castle gardens. All in all Ahiru wasn’t sure what to look at first, and her eyes darted around the room as she walked slowly in.

“Good afternoon, Ahiru.” Rue smiled. “You are just in time – do come and sit down, will you not?”

“Of – of course!” Ahiru tore her attention away from the shimmering, diaphanous curtains hung on either side of the window behind Rue and hurried over to the other sofa. She curtsied before sitting down. “I’m sorry! A-and it’s so nice to see you, and thank you for inviting me… oh, a-and, these are for you!” She leapt up as if an ember had burnt her backside, and presented Rue with the bouquet.

“For me? Oh, Ahiru, you are far too kind.” Rue took the flowers from her, and inhaled deeply. “Mmmm… how lovely, truly. I do so love spring flowers.” She looked over at the maid, hovering at the door. “Excuse me – we will not be needing any further refreshment for the moment, so you may leave, but do take these flowers with you, and place them in a vase with water, please.”

“Of course, my lady.” The maid came over and took the bouquet. “Shall I bring the vase back here afterwards?”

“Ah…” Rue considered. “Yes, I think so, but do wait until I have finished taking tea – I have no wish to be disturbed until we are done.”

“Naturally, my lady.” She curtsied and then bustled back out of the room, closing the doors as she went.

“Ah, privacy.” Rue sighed. “Something you do get so little of in a palace.” She picked up the tea pot. “Tea, Ahiru?”

“Y-yes, please, thank you, but I can pour it if you want.” Ahiru fidgeted. “Y-you’re royalty, you shouldn’t have to…”

“Nonsense, I am your hostess.” Rue poured some steaming hot tea into a delicate china cup, and set it in front of Ahiru. “I cannot allow you to wait upon yourself in this matter.” She poured herself some as well before setting the tea pot aside. “I have had our wonderful pastry chef create some treats for us today, I do hope you will indulge – she does the most amazing work. And are you able to adjust your tea satisfactorily?”

“Oh yes, thank you.” Ahiru took up the sugar tongs, and used them to drop three cubes from the gleaming silver bowl into her tea, careful not to send drops of it flying onto the delicate lace tablecloth beneath her saucer. She stirred the sugar till it had completely dissolved, and then poured a little bit of cream from the small jug provided. “And I’ll try some of these, I promise – they all look really good and I’m definitely hungry. N-not that I don’t eat enough at home, I just… wanted to save my appetite…” She blushed and bowed her head.

“Oh no, I did not think any such thing, do not fret.” Rue laughed, a gentle and musical sort of laugh. “I would never suspect Edel of mistreating or starving you, I had figured that you might well go light on lunch so as to properly enjoy a good tea here.” She added a bit of cream to her cup, and ignored the bowl of sugar cubes. “Ah… I do so think there is something ever so delightful about tea taken in the afternoon like this, would you not agree? I feel as though it refreshes the very soul.”

“Me too.” Ahiru looked over the selection before her, and chose one of rolled sweet dough with a filling of cinnamon and sugar. “I sometimes get really tired around this time if I’ve been working hard all day, so a cup of tea is good to wake me up a little, not too much because I don’t want to be kept awake all night, but just enough, you know?”

“Yes, though I daresay you work considerably harder than I do.” Rue served herself a sliver of cake and took a slim silver fork to eat it with. “How are you doing on that score, come to that? It feels like so long since we have spoken, and surely you must have learned so much by now.”

“Yes, I have!” Ahiru brightened. “I’m still doing stuff that has to be brewed or blended or cooked, because there’s so much of that to learn and master that it’ll take me a long time to finish, but I’m also learning other stuff. We start doing divination methods on Friday mornings, and I’ve already learned astrology, and palmistry… I think we’re going to move onto to runes or tarots next, I’m not sure…” She took another bite of her pastry and ate it. “A-and you’re right, this is really good…”

“I will tell our chef, then – she will be delighted to hear.” Rue smiled. “As am I to hear of your progress – I do find divination ever so intriguing. I know little about it, but it seems to be a fascinating art.” She sighed. “Sometimes I do envy you the chance to become educated on such things – I have little time for myself between all my duties as princess, but I think I would relish the chance to learn something practical as you do.”

“But what you do is really important too!” Ahiru took a sip of tea. “Somebody has to help the prince run the country, right? And somebody has to run the castle and make sure everything’s in order, and… and whatever else you do, I’m not really sure.” She let out a sheepish sort of laugh. “But whatever it is, I bet it’s just as important as what I do, just in different ways. Don’t downplay it.”

“Oh, Ahiru.” Rue gave her a fond look. “You are simply one of the sweetest people I have ever had the good fortune to meet. Edel is a lucky woman indeed to have you as apprentice, and all those you serve or will serve are blessed as well, for I daresay they will never want for compassion as long as they are in your care.”

“I…” Ahiru blushed, and ducked her head a little. “Th-thank you, I… I try… that’s why I want to be a witch, I like helping people… I want to make people happy.”

“I am certain you do.” Rue ate another forkful of cake. “Edel, for one, seems to be happier now that you are around. I am not saying I believed her to be unhappy before your arrival, of course, and I do not know her quite as well as I should like, but I think that your presence makes her life easier and more pleasant.”

“W-well, yeah, she’s… she’s said that I help a lot with easing her workload.” Ahiru polished off her first pastry, and took a cookie from the assortment next, one laden with pine nuts and spices and small pieces of chocolate. “For example, we were really busy just before Halloween, with things for the holiday and for your wedding and regular orders and other stuff, and she had an easier time because I was there to help.”

“Oh yes, that is easy to imagine.” Rue nodded. “It astounds me when I think of all she must have to do in a week, and I did feel twinges of guilt over burdening her additionally with all my needs for my wedding to dear Siegfried… I know that Halloween is a very… significant holiday.” Something in her eyes flickered. “And that she must field a great deal of requests on top of what she does normally. It becomes further astounding when I realize that in years past she shouldered such a workload alone, without the aid of someone like you to assist her. True, she would not have had my wedding to tend to, but still… I am glad that you were present this year to help her.”

“Me too! I mean… I’m just really glad I came here at all.” Ahiru took a bite of cookie, and waited till she’d chewed and swallowed it to speak again. “I wasn’t sure if I’d fit in at first when I came here, cause I’d never been here before and I didn’t know anyone, so it was all very new and strange…”

“I can relate to that.” Rue sighed and sipped her tea. “It was much the same for me when I came here. I had never really lived here before, and so I had to become accustomed to the traditions of this land and meet so many people, and it was frankly overwhelming to be thrown into it all, like being tossed into a river and expected to swim right away… and not only that, to…” She waved a hand as if trying to think of the right term. “I was handed the responsibilities of a princess, and made to learn the intricacies of court life, and… it is so complex, Ahiru, more than you can imagine. I am happy, but I would not wish such trials on anyone. It is for love only that I married, power is not a thing I would seek for its own sake, particularly not after my experience with marrying into it.” She gave a slight laugh. “I am sure there are those who believe otherwise of my reasons for wedding the prince, but they could not be more wrong.”

“They’re silly to think such things!” Ahiru said hotly. “I – I can’t imagine you doing something so cold as that, and I can tell you’re happy and that Siegfried is happy too and… you two are such a perfect couple, you really are, and I’m happy for you.”

“Thank you, Ahiru.” Rue smiled again. “But I must also apologize, for I did not mean to derail and make the conversation about myself. I wish to hear about you – you say you are happy you came here?”

“Oh, yes!” Ahiru nodded. “I felt weird at first, and I didn’t know if I’d ever fit in… but now I consider it my home, and I love it here, and I’ve met so many nice people, and really settled in.”

“I am pleased to hear that.” Rue took a flaky pastry filled with cream cheese and dotted with sliced almonds. “And have you made friends among the people you have met? I do hope so.”

“I have!” Ahiru took a big gulp of tea. “I made friends with some people that I meet at the marketplace, like there’s this girl named Freya who sells flowers and I had her arrange your bouquet cause she knows flowers and stuff really well, and a woman named Raetsel who sells honey, and of course Fakir too, we’re really good friends now.”

“Oh, now, that is especially good to hear.” Rue swallowed a bite of pastry. “I had been concerned about him, you see, particularly since he resigned from the knights and left the castle. It is heartening to know he has a friend such as you, and is not simply spending his days moping about Edel’s house.” She sipped some of her tea. “What _does_ he do with his days, now that I think of it?”

“Well, he…” Ahiru frowned slightly. “He works at his father’s forge – cause his father is a blacksmith – and learns how to do that, he works most days there.”

“Ah yes, smithing… a most worthy and vital occupation.” Rue picked up a thin cloth napkin and dabbed at the corners of her mouth. “Does he intend to go into that line of work when he has mastered it?”

“I don’t know.” Ahiru fidgeted. “The… last time I talked to him about it he said he still doesn’t know. He… wants to take things slowly and not decide on a future too quickly after stopping being a knight.”

“…I see.” Rue’s eyes flickered again, and the reddish tint that they could sometimes have seemed stronger. “That… does make sense.” She took another sip of tea. “And what about the other days of the week?”

Ahiru blinked. “Well, he, um… he doesn’t work Saturdays or Sundays cause his father gave him those days off, and he usually doesn’t work Fridays either because we both meet with our literature tutor on Friday afternoons.”

“I see.” Rue drained the last of her tea. “And with what does he occupy his free time? Does he spend much of it with you?”

“We… uh… y-yeah, we do a lot of things together.” Ahiru nodded slowly. “We – we spend time talking, and… we take walks, and he’s teaching me how to ride his horse, and we talk about the books we read… oh, I said that already, sort of… we’re pretty close.” She frowned. “Why do you ask?”

“Curiosity. Concern.” Rue shrugged. “The impression I received of him when he lived here was not entirely… that is to say, he was not terrible forthcoming or willing to be open about… certain things. What does he speak to _you_ about? Does he open up to you?”

“I… um…” Ahiru looked down at the half of a cookie still in her hand; she put it on her plate. “Y-yeah, he… like I said, we’re close, and… he trusts me, and…” She stopped. “Wh-why do you want to know?”

“Did I not say?” Rue’s brow knit with confusion. “Curiosity and concern. I wish only for – for his wellbeing, is that not obvious? I want a good future for him.”

Ahiru’s frown deepened. “But… but I thought you didn’t like him.”

“Oh, now, is that something he has told you?” Rue waved a hand dismissively and laughed, though her smile didn’t reach her eyes. “He can be rather… oh, what _is_ the term I require… I am not sure, but my point is that he does sometimes reach erroneous conclusions based on… on various things which might _suggest_ that he is correct, but are not actually the truth. For example, he has taken the way the two of us interact and assumed that I wish him ill. I do not. I want him to live a long and happy life.”

“Well, that’s… I mean, me too, but…” Ahiru clasped her hands together in her lap. “I – I can’t really blame him for thinking that, you two don’t get along when I’ve seen you…”

“It is not my fault he can be the most infuriating man at times.” Rue’s eyes flashed. “Surely you will have had experience with his less appealing traits? He is quite often a most difficult person to get along with, rather abrasive, and… well, you have lived with him for a few months now, you do not need _me_ to tell you of his flaws.” She laughed again. “But you must also understand, Ahiru, that finding him insufferable is not the same thing as wishing him ill. You do understand that, do you not?”

“Oh… yes… of course…” Ahiru fidgeted again, and tried to relax her tensed up shoulders. “I – I know _that_...”

“I am glad.” Rue sighed. “For it is… complicated, Ahiru. I admit that he and I clash, and that… all right, I will be straightforward and say that I am not terribly… I cannot be truly fond of him because of his personality and the way that we react to each other. But at the same time, I cannot…” She stared down at her own fingers. “I feel… perhaps obligated is the best word. I feel obligated to see to it that he prospers. To have a good future.”

“Huh?” Ahiru tilted her head. “Why would you feel obligated to do that?”

“Well, it is… a debt, perhaps?” Rue pursed her lips. “He has… done much for Siegfried, you see, and as Siegfried’s wife I do take on his debts, in a sense… it is one of the things I agreed to when I spoke my marriage vows. We promised to share both good and bad with each other, after all, and… well, I must be grateful for…” Her hand went to her stomach. “He has done so much for Siegfried, and if I can see to it that he is… repaid in some way, I would like to, for I am grateful for my husband’s sake, and for…” She shook her head. “I do not like being in debt to another, Ahiru, understand that – it grates at me. My desire is to settle them as hastily as I can, to repay others for what they have done. And if I cannot, it weighs at my heart and on my nerves as well.”

“I understand that. I do, really. But…” Ahiru smoothed her skirt down where she’d been clutching at it. “It’s really not _your_ responsibility if he did something for the prince and not you, right? Don’t make yourself upset trying to settle someone else’s debts, you have to take care of yourself and the baby. Whatever he did was his choice, and doesn’t have anything to do with you.”

“Well, it is actually… it was…” Rue looked down again, and sighed. “No, you… I suppose that you are right. That does not mean that it will be easy to let go of my feeling of indebtedness, nor my desire to do something about it, but for my child’s sake I will try. This I promise.” She looked back up, and managed something of a smile. “Thank you, Ahiru.”

“I… well, I didn’t really do anything, but… you’re welcome.” Ahiru glanced at her teacup; a few drops remained that had likely gone cold by now. “Um… I…” She looked out the window. “I think… I think I’m going to go home now, if that’s okay… I said I’d be home by dinner, and it’s a long walk, and… and yeah.” She swallowed.

“Oh, certainly.” Rue sat up straighter. “I am sorry, Ahiru, I do not want to keep you longer than you may stay.”

“It’s okay.” Ahiru rose. “A-and thanks again for having me, it was really nice of you… a-and how are you doing, with – with the baby and all, I kind of forgot to ask earlier, sorry…”

“It is quite all right, I think I distracted you with other things.” Rue smiled, and this one reached her eyes. “The child and I are both doing very well, thank you – we are in excellent health and my physician does not foresee a difficult birth. And I will most definitely be calling upon Edel – and by extension you as well – for help with things after the birth. It would not do to have my newborn snatched by the fairies and replaced with a changeling, after all.” Her expression darkened for a moment. “No, that would not do at _all_.”

“No, it really wouldn’t.” Ahiru shuddered. “Well, I – I’m glad you’re both healthy, that’s good. A-and you don’t have to walk me out or anything, just stay there… I know it’s probably getting harder for you to get up when you’re sitting…”

“Indeed.” Rue laughed. “Well, then, take care, Ahiru.” She smiled. “I hope to see you again soon, or at least with a shorter span of time between meetings than there was between this and our previous encounter.”

“Y-yes, me too, and you take care too!” Ahiru nodded. “Bye!” She curtsied before walking away, and then did so again when she got to the door, unsure as she was that waving would be appropriate. She glanced back over her shoulder only once at Rue, and then headed down the hall.

Ahiru didn’t run out of the castle; not precisely. She had no wish to look as if she was hurrying home, after all, for that would likely draw suspicious attention. But she also felt deep in her gut that she wanted to be away from the palace and back home as swiftly as she could, that she really needed to get away from what had just happened. Not because she suddenly disliked Rue – she still liked her, there was no doubt about that – but because something about that conversation had made her feel _wrong_. She couldn’t put her finger on why, she just knew it had.

More than anything else, though, it gave her the inexplicable urge to run to Fakir and hold him and never let go.


	22. Chapter 22

Early in the morning on the twelfth of May, Ahiru boarded a coach that would carry her back to the city where she’d spent the majority of her young life. Lilie’s wedding would take place on the sixteenth, and so Ahiru had carefully planned her trip so as to make things easier for herself. She’d get there a few days early, giving her the chance to relax and spend some time with Pike and her parents (who were graciously letting her stay with them again), and leave on the eighteenth, so as not to have the specter of packing and going to bed early hanging over her during the wedding reception.

When the coach pulled into the station late in the afternoon on the thirteenth, the Autenbergs were there to greet her and take her back to their manor. A servant took her luggage up to the room she’d be staying in, while she herself was led along to the room reserved for eating dinner. It looked out onto the well-groomed garden Pike’s family maintained, offering a pleasant view ideal for making conversation. Ahiru was so exhausted from her trip, however, that she couldn’t manage much in the way of either eating or talking this time, and soon excused herself to her room. She took a bath to soothe herself and wash away the dust of the road, and then fell into bed and slept without waking until dawn.

She spent the next two days touring the city with Pike. They visited all the places they used to frequent, as well as some new ones that Pike wanted to introduce her to. The city hadn’t changed all that much in the past eight months, but the alterations that _had_ taken place were enough to disorient Ahiru a bit. She’d known already that she considered Goldkrone her home now, but just _how_ much the city of her birth had ceased to feel like home hadn’t been as apparent until her return. There was certainly an element of nostalgia to the feelings that walking through the streets and visiting her old favorite shops and parks produced in her, but more than anything it made her homesick for Goldkrone.

She couldn’t help but wonder, though: would it be different if she weren’t alone? Certainly, she wasn’t wandering around the city free of escort, she left the house accompanied at all times by Pike at the very least, but she still felt a bit like a lonely tourist regardless. If she’d traveled here with Fakir or Edel or both, perhaps it would have a different feel to it. Instead of being taken around the place that used to be her home by people who still lived there, she’d be showing it to people from where she lived now. That had to have an entirely separate feel to it, didn’t it? Granted, she’d never experienced either, but she felt strongly that it couldn’t possibly be the same.

And indeed, she did long for their company, particularly Fakir’s. Her mind repeatedly wandered as they roamed the streets, dreaming up what she’d tell him about this or that thing or place that they passed, if only he were by her side. He’d offered to go with her, to be sure she was safe on the coach, but she’d declined, for reasons that she had to keep reminding herself of every time she let herself entertain wistful thoughts of him going with her to the wedding. How would it be to have Pike and Lilie and everyone else assume they were a couple? It made her shudder. The amount of teasing she’d endure from Lilie especially, how awkward and uncomfortable poor Fakir would be… it didn’t bear dwelling on. No, better for him to stay in Goldkrone, he’d never enjoy such a gathering. He didn’t even like being the center of attention at his own birthday party, for goodness sake; she couldn’t make him endure the scrutiny of people hoping she would be the next eligible lady at the party to marry.

Nevertheless, that thought was on her mind when she went to bed on the fifteenth. She fell asleep soon after her head touched the pillow, and drifted into a particularly surreal dream. Her marriage to Fakir was the centerpiece, but the set and players had been hopelessly distorted. For starters, it was taking place at the bottom of a lake, on the massive gears of a clock whose ticking sounded like drumbeats. Mr. Katz was there to perform the ceremony, but he’d been transformed into a tall purple cat in strange clothes, who expounded on the joys of marriage for quite some time. Lilie was there too, married to a bull, and Princess Rue and Prince Siegfried wore bizarre black costumes and danced eerily and sadly with one another. At one point she was sure that Prince Siegfried turned into a blackbird and flew away, Rue in pursuit on foot. Ebine served them dish after dish of cold food at the reception, and Edel turned out to be a marionette on strings who rose up into the water and vanished from sight. At some point Fakir transformed into a tree; just after she’d embraced him, weeping and promising to stay by his side forever, Ahiru woke up with a jolt.

In the hazy grey of pre-dawn, she wasn’t sure where she was at first. Ahiru blinked several times. As her eyes slowly adjusted, she looked around the room with gradual realization as to her location. The dregs of the dream still clung to her mind, and she stared at the ceiling while she reviewed what she remembered of it. What had that _been?_ There was no way on earth she could possibly explain where that had come from. If she didn’t know better she’d have thought it to be a fever dream.

It eventually faded from her mind for the most part. She drifted back into a light sleep, half-waking a few times before finally making herself get up and put on a robe over her nightclothes. Outside she could hear the scattered chirps of a few birds, and out of habit she headed over to the window to check her bowl of feed. Only when she’d opened it did she remember that she had no such thing set out here. Ahiru stared sadly at the empty sill for a couple minutes, and reminded herself that she’d be home in a few days.

She was still yawning as she made her way downstairs to the breakfast room. Mr. Autenberg greeted her politely but absently as he exited, clearly having risen early in order to leave early as well for some sort of important business. Inside, Pike and her mother had only just started eating. Lady Autenberg was too absorbed in the morning paper to notice Ahiru entering, but Pike looked up from buttering her toasted bread and smiled. “Morning, Ahiru. Ready for Lilie’s big day?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be, I guess.” Ahiru sank into a chair and poured herself some tea. “I wonder if it’ll be…”

“Completely ridiculous?” Pike supplied. Ahiru giggled nervously and nodded. “There’s no doubt in my mind it will be. I mean, Lilie will have told you about her husband to be, but there’s… really no substitute for meeting him.” Her expression went blank and distant for a moment. “And she’s flat out said that they’re going all out for this – she called it a ‘most momentous event’.” A slight shudder seemed to go through her.

“And that’s bad?” Ahiru made herself a small sandwich once she’d sweetened her tea.

“Well, I wouldn’t say _bad_ , exactly, just…” Pike chewed thoughtfully. “Honestly, I’m not sure how I’d describe it, I just know it’s bound to be memorable one way or another. And _completely_ over the top.”

“I suppose it’s a family trait.” Lady Autenberg sipped her tea. “The Teufels never have been inclined towards subtlety. This Mr. Holst seems quite the same way.”

“Are you acquainted with his family?” Ahiru asked.

“We mingle in the same society, but I have never been particularly close to his parents.” She shrugged. “Still, until I met their son I’d thought they seemed like decent, sensible people. But now I wonder if truly sensible folk would overindulge their son’s flights of fancy to the degree they obviously have.” She sighed. “I can only hope that the offspring of this union, by some miracle, turn out more down to earth than their parents. And that my Pike makes a smarter choice when her time comes.”

Pike rolled her eyes. “Mama…”

“Don’t you ‘Mama’ me.” Lady Autenberg fixed her with a stern glance over the top of the newspaper. “I know we’ve spoken about this before, but it bears repeating. Do you really think I or Papa want to see you wed to a – a flamboyant fool like Femio Holst? He is of a good and reputable family, it is true, but his personality leaves much to be desired and I fear that that respectability of the Holst name will go down once he is left in charge of everything. You must tie yourself to someone more suitable, my dear, and the sooner the better.”

“Well, maybe I’ll catch the bouquet at the wedding today and that will guarantee me a good match.” Pike waited until her mother had made a noncommittal noise and returned to reading her paper to roll her eyes again. “Anyway, Ahiru, you’re in for an interesting time today, and I guarantee you won’t be bored.”

“I – I’m sure I won’t.” Ahiru took a bite of her sandwich and ate it. “It’s at the Holst estate just outside the city, right?”

“Yeah.” Pike hastily swallowed down the rest of her pastry before her mother caught on to the fact that she’d just talked with her mouth full. “I haven’t been there yet, so it’ll be new for both of us. I’ve heard from Lilie that they have an impressive rose garden, so I’m interested in seeing that.”

Ahiru thought about Lilie’s description of Femio’s proposal. “Y-yeah, I’ve heard that too.”

The newspaper rustled again as Lady Autenberg turned a page. “Do give the Holsts my regards, won’t you? Whatever I think of their approach to raising their son, they are pleasant people overall and I would hate to sour terms with them. A connection is a connection, after all.”

“Yes, of course.” Pike seemed to scowl, briefly, at her tea cup. “When do you want us back home?”

“A decent hour.” Lady Autenberg shrugged. “You know how to maintain propriety, after all, I’ve taught you well, but do not rush off, that would be improper as well. I trust your judgment, and Ahiru’s as well. You’ll make us proud, no doubt.”

“All right.” Pike drained her tea. “And anyway, the wedding’s in the middle of the day, so we shouldn’t be too late. If it was an evening wedding that’d be one thing, but…”

“I went to one of those. Sort of.” Ahiru swung her legs a little under the table, now that there was no one she could accidentally kick. “It was in the afternoon, and the party went on late into the night.”

“Oh yeah, I think you told me about that.” Pike nodded. “That was the one on Halloween, right?”

“Yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “The prince and princess of Schwangau.”

“Royalty?” Lady Autenberg raised an eyebrow. “Now _that_ is quite a connection.”

“Well, I – I guess.” Ahiru stopped swinging her legs and squirmed. “Sort of. I mean… it was kind of part of my work? I only got invited cause the princess was having Edel – the witch I’m learning from, that’s her name – she was having her do some protective spells and wards for the wedding and I got to go too so I could help and learn.”

“Oh yes, I’d nearly forgotten that country people still believe in the Fair Folk.” She laughed. “Rather superstitious lot, aren’t they? I hope you’re keeping your head around them, dear.”

“I – but –” Ahiru faltered. “It – it’s not superstition, fairies are real…”

“Have you seen one?” Lady Autenberg set her paper down.

“W-well, no… not that I know of, but…” Ahiru clutched at her robe beneath the table. “But I’ve been in the forest, where the border between the worlds is, and I’ve _seen_ the border, and it’s really creepy in there.”

“That’s just the power of suggestion working on you.” Lady Autenberg gave her a pitying look. “Don’t feel too bad, it can happen to anyone – someone convinces you of a thing and then all you can see is evidence of it. I’m sure it’s not so bad in broad daylight, with a picnicking party. Anything odd tends to lose its aura of mystery in such a setting.”

“I – I don’t know…”

“The border?” Pike asked. “What do you mean, the border? I thought the fairy realm was intangible.”

“I – I guess it is, but… there are also physical boundaries in the woods.” Ahiru pushed her empty cup and plate away. “There was an agreement several generations ago that set the borders between the human world and the fairy world and the humans are supposed to take good care of the forest they get to use. Fa – somebody told me that to ensure that, a human child from a noble family was handed over to the Fairy King to seal the treaty.”

“Ooooh!” Pike’s eyes lit up. “So like a changeling, then? Only willingly?”

“Um, yeah, sort of.” Ahiru fidgeted. “I mean, whoever the poor child was that got handed over didn’t have a choice about it…”

“It’s just a tale, dear,” Lady Autenberg interjected. “Don’t worry about it. Right now I think you two have more pressing matters to concern yourselves with, such as getting ready to leave for the wedding.”

“Oh!” Pike paled. “Yes, Ahiru, she’s right… if you’re all done eating, let’s go back upstairs, we’ve instructed a lady’s maid to attend to you today.”

“O-okay.” Ahiru nodded. “Y-yeah, I’m done.”

They hurried back up to their rooms, where their maids were waiting to help them. Ahiru bathed and freshened up first, and then slipped herself into the gown she’d bought for the occasion. The maid the Autenbergs had provided for her arranged her hair and even added a small amount of make-up to her face. Once all that was done it was back downstairs in a hurry to bid Lady Autenberg farewell and climb aboard the family coach. The driver would take them to the Holst’s manor, and wait there for them while they attended the festivities so that they could be driven back at the event’s end.

“Hey, what’d you buy for them, anyway?” Pike asked after they’d been riding a while. “I keep forgetting to ask you.”

“Oh… I…” Ahiru looked out the window, fighting the urge to fiddle with her necklace. “I – I made her some bath things, and some tea blends…”

“Oh, perfect!” Pike’s face lit up. “I bought them a nice tea set, so they can use your tea with it. Well, assuming it’s not a duplicate that they return to the store.” She sighed. “Who knows what other people bought for them? Honestly, I wish I had the skills to make them something unique like you did, so I wouldn’t be worrying about this.”

“Wh – really?” Ahiru stared at her. “But I thought… I thought being able to buy them something expensive was better…”

“Not if two people get them the same thing! And besides, it probably evens out in the end anyway, since you spent money on the ingredients and put in lots of time and work.” Pike shrugged. “I think most people appreciate getting personalized gifts. And if they don’t, well, I don’t want to have anything to do with them.”

“Ahahahaha… I don’t think your mother would like to hear you say that.” Ahiru tried to laugh. “Cause I bet a lot of people who’d prefer expensive store-bought things are the kinds of people she wants you to be connected with.”

“Oh, bother her and her ‘connections’!” Pike rolled her eyes. “I mean, I know it’s probably important, but really… I don’t think it’s – or rather, I don’t think I want to live life like she does, I want…” She broke off. “Oh, here we are already, I guess we’ll talk about that later.”

They pulled up in front of a massive manor quite unlike any Ahiru had ever seen before. It only seemed to have two floors, but as if to compensate it sprawled out over the land in long stretches to either side. Trees lined the long path up to the front gates, and the coach had to maneuver around a massive pool with a fountain at its center. The fountain itself was a statue of a faun holding an urn from which water flowed freely, sparkling in the bright morning sun and filling the air with a pleasant babbling noise. The front doors themselves, giant portals made of wood inlaid with gold and silver, stood open already as a butler greeted other guests who’d just arrived. Ahiru and Pike goggled at everything as they disembarked, and then hurried up to the front door while the Autenberg’s driver took the coach away to wait.

“And you are?” The butler looked down his nose at the two of them. “Friends of the bride or groom?”

“The bride.” Pike smoothly produced their invitations from her handbag. “Misses Pike Autenberg and Ahiru Klein.”

The butler took the invitations and inspected them, then nodded and handed both back to Pike. “Very well, come in, you are expected.”

“Thanks.” Pike curtsied, and so did Ahiru, before proceeding into the house. A grand foyer awaited them, again like nothing they’d ever seen before. Their shoes made something of a din on the well-polished floors, and dozens of nervous-looking reflections of themselves peered back at them from the mirrored walls, in between massive marble statues of fanciful beasts and inhumanly gorgeous people. At the very center of it all, a larger than life stone replica of a man smirking and holding a rose to his face stood at the foot of the huge double staircase that led up to the second floor. Pike nudged Ahiru. “That’s him.”

“What?” Ahiru looked around the room. “What’s who? Who’s what?”

“The statue.” Pike nudged her again and pointed at the statue of the young man with a rose. “Femio. The groom.”

“Oh…” Ahiru stared at it. “Oh my…”

“Words failing you?” Pike grinned. “It’ll be even worse when you meet the real thing, trust me.”

“Well… at least…” Ahiru struggled to form a thought. “Lilie seems happy, at least…”

“There is that, true.” Pike laughed. “Her life with him promises to be interesting, no doubt about that, and in the way she’d like best. It wouldn’t be suited to you or me, but then, to each their own.” She shrugged. “I’m just glad she found someone who suits her.”

“Yeah, me too, I –”

“Excuse me?” A maid hurried up to them. “I hate to interrupt, but I’ve been told that you are the Misses Autenberg and Klein, is that correct?”

“Yeah, that’s us.” Pike sized up the maid. “Is there a problem?”

“Oh no, not at all!” She shook her head. “It’s only that I was told by Lady Lilie to escort you directly to her bedchamber as soon as you arrived, for she wishes to speak with you before the ceremony.”

“You know, that doesn’t surprise me.” Pike laughed. “All right, then, lead the way.”

The maid nodded. “Follow me.” She led them up the double staircase to the second floor, and deep into the east wing. Their path twisted and turned a bit, and Ahiru found herself wondering how she would ever find her way out and to where they were supposed to be for the actual wedding. Before she could panic too much, though, they found themselves at a closed set of double doors, which the maid knocked on. “Lady Lilie? I’ve brought the two guests as you requested.”

“Wonderful!” Lilie trilled from inside the room. “Let them in, will you, and then stay outside the door, for surely they will need assistance back out, I would hate for them to become hopelessly lost in the halls and starve to death and never see my wedding, that would be _such_ a tragedy…”

“As you wish.” She opened the doors, revealing an enormous antechamber that had been set up to accommodate Lilie’s preparation for the day. She sat in front of a massive vanity with curlers in her hair, one maid doing her makeup while a few more stood waiting by the elaborate gown on display. The air smelled strongly of roses, and Ahiru could see a glimpse of the famous gardens from the window on the back wall.

“My dears!” Lilie clasped her hands together and beamed at them in the mirror as they walked in. The maid closed the double doors behind them. “I simply cannot tell you how much it means to me to have you both here on this, possibly the most important day of my life… and what an honor it is for _you_ ,  to be so blessed as to be able to attend the most lavish and momentous affair of the season. No, the year… no, the decade… the century! Perhaps _ever!_ ”

“It – it’s good to see you, Lilie.” Ahiru curtsied. “I’m happy I could be here for you.”

“Oh Ahiru, so am I,” Lilie cooed. “Come, you two, come closer so that I may look better at you. This will be the last time you see me as an unmarried woman, and I wish for us to savor the finality of the moment.”

“You make it sound foreboding,” Pike muttered as she and Ahiru walked over to stand by Lilie’s side.

“Perish the thought, Pike!” Lilie shook her head, making the maid who was about to add some makeup to her eyes jump back just in time before a lengthy smeared line wound up on the bride-to-be’s forehead. “Yes, my single self could be said to be perishing too, today… but I prefer to think of it as a caterpillar transforming into a beautiful butterfly.” She let out a dreamy sigh, and the maid cautiously returned to the application of makeup. “No longer will I be a sad, single maiden, but instead I will wed the man of my dreams and we will forge an unforgettable future together.”

“Yes, I’m sure you will.” Pike somehow kept a straight face, and Ahiru struggled not to laugh. “Is that why you wanted to see us before the ceremony? To… savor the finality or whatever?”

“Yes, indeed.” Lilie inspected her nails, which clearly had been freshly painted in bright blood red to match her gown. Rue had worn a red dress for her wedding too, but the similarities ended at the color, for Lilie’s was much more garish, with lace and ruffles and sequins everywhere, and tiny rubies sewn into the velvet bodice. No doubt it would be eye-wateringly bright in the full sunlight. “You are my nearest and dearest friends, why would I not wish to share my last moments on earth as a single woman with you? You wouldn’t begrudge me that, would you?”

“Of course not.” Ahiru shook her head. “We – we’re honored to be here, really.”

“Good.” Lilie was forced to close her eyes as the maid applied mascara to her lashes. “Because that would be ever so cruel, you know.”

“Yeah, we know.” Pike took advantage of Lilie’s temporary inability to see her face to roll her eyes. “Don’t go getting yourself into a tizzy over imagined slights.”

“Well, I never!” Lilie sniffed.

“So, um, are you going to live here after the wedding?” Ahiru asked hastily, to head off the storm she could see beginning to brew. “It seems really nice.”

“Oh, it is, Ahiru, it is the most extravagant place!” Lilie let out another dreamy sigh, even as she opened her eyes. “I would relish being the mistress of such a manor. Alas, it is not to be – not permanently, at least. When our grand gala today is at its end, my dear Femio and I shall depart on a luxurious honeymoon abroad, and upon our return will live here only long enough to pack up our things for the move to one of the northern estates. We may well be bringing that magnificent statue of him with us, the one that sits in the front hall – did you see it upon your entrance?”

“Can’t miss it,” Pike said, her face carefully neutral.

“True, true.” Lilie smiled. “It is the most stunning thing, truly, second only to my dear Femio himself. I cannot wait for you to meet him! I doubt you will be as impressed as I am, for he is my true love and not yours, but you will still be in awe, I guarantee that.”

Pike looked like she was about to say something, so Ahiru jumped in instead. “I – I’m sure we will be, and he seems like you two are really well-suited… I’m so happy for you, Lilie!”

“Thank you, Ahiru, you are the kindest of souls, much too good for this vicious world.” Lilie tilted her head to allow the maid to apply color to her cheeks. “Alas that I will be too occupied and too distant to take on the task of finding the both of you suitable matches as well… but if ever, _ever_ you two have need of my assistance in the arena of romance, do write to me, and I shall fly to your sides and help! I am now an expert, after all, and would only be too willing to lend you my talents and see to it that you are happily wed as well.”

“… Yeah, we’ll keep that in mind, thanks.” Pike shifted on her feet. “Anyway, we should probably let you finish getting ready, and find our places outside…”

“Yes, yes, good point!” Lilie nodded. “I would embrace you two before you leave, but alas, I fear it is not prudent at the moment… later, however!”

“Y-yeah, that’s fine.” Ahiru swallowed. The thought of Lilie practically squeezing the life out of her again was not something she looked forward to. “Well, see you later, then… and have… I mean… best wishes!” She tried not to cringe.

“Later, my darlings!” Lilie called after them as they headed back out of the room. Ahiru spared another glance at the overwrought confection of velvet and silk as they passed it; she shuddered and turned away.

As she’d been instructed to do, the maid who’d led them to Lilie’s room stood waiting in the hall. She nodded as they emerged, and then led them back downstairs and out of the house. To their right they could distantly see where a massive purple tent with gold trim had been set up, evidently for the reception, and on the lawn that stretched out for what felt like miles before coming to the rose gardens (which themselves seemed endless, at least from their current vantage point) a special area had been arranged for the wedding itself. Chairs had been set up in a circle quite as large as that in the Schwangau royal palace, round the space where the couple would meet in the middle to speak their vows. An arbor bearing roses and strange bags with strings attached had been built around where Lilie and Femio would stand, and Ahiru eyed it curiously, wondering with some trepidation what the bags’ function was meant to be. Another servant was in charge of showing them to their assigned seats, and before too long they were waiting in chairs upholstered with eye-poppingly bright shades of gold and violet.

“Phew.” Pike let her breath out in a loud exhale. “You’re probably going to get mad at me for saying this, Ahiru, but she’s been insufferable lately. And in my defense, you haven’t been around to take the brunt of it.”

Ahiru frowned. “How so?”

“Well, you got a bit of it back there.” Pike rolled her eyes. “I mean, I know she’s happy, I know she’s excited, and I certainly don’t begrudge her any of it, but sometimes I’ve wanted to discuss other things besides every detail of the wedding, you know? I realize that’s selfish but I can only take so much.”

“Even if it is selfish, I think it’s okay.” Ahiru shook her head. “You have things going on in your life too, and they’re just as important. You should be able to talk about them with your friends.”

Pike snorted. “Try telling _her_ that! She’s latched onto the idea that her impending nuptials supersede everything else, and that anything I have going on is trivial and superficial in comparison. I mean, I guess it kind of is, but still… hearing that over and over can grate on a person.”

“No, I understand that.” Ahiru smoothed the skirts of her dress. “And for what it’s worth, I think your stuff is just as important, cause it’s important to you. Not that getting married isn’t important too, just… I don’t know.” She sighed. “I think it’s kind of rude of her to dismiss you like that.”

“Well, she’s always been like that, to be fair.” Pike laughed. “It’s just gotten worse lately, especially with her repeated assertions that she’s going to be soooooo busy once she’s married, plus the claims at having romantic expertise.” She rolled her eyes. “Ahiru, if you know what’s good for you, you won’t ever let her know if you’ve got someone you’re sweet on.”

“Don’t worry about that.” Ahiru shuddered. “I know better than that… I can just picture her doing things like… like writing a fake love letter or something.”

“Oh, the horror!” Pike shuddered. “She’s shown me some of her love letters to Femio before sending them off, and I wouldn’t wish those on anyone… I mean, obviously _he_ enjoys them, judging by the enthusiastic responses she’s gotten – which she’s also shown me, good grief, the less said about those the better – but he’s not really…” She paused. “Not like other people. Very peculiar tastes and sensibilities.”

“It seems like it, yeah…” Ahiru let her gaze roam, and it fell once again on the strange arbor at the edges of the sacred circle where he and Lilie would take their vows.

“Oh, you have no idea.” Pike shivered again, despite the growing warmth of the day. “But yes, I’d hate to see her meddle in any love affairs of yours… seems like a recipe for disaster.”

“I’ll never let her. Don’t worry.” Ahiru shifted in her seat. “I mean, it’s kind of her to offer and want to help, but her help is… well, I don’t think it would actually _be_ help.”

“To put it mildly.” Pike laughed again. “How _are_ you doing on that front, anyway? I know I’ve asked you in letters before, but I think it’s more fun to talk in person… and don’t worry, I’d never breathe a word to Lilie. Has anyone in Goldkrone caught your eye?”

“Um… well… I guess you could say that…” Ahiru’s hand went to her necklace, and her gaze to the ground. “But I… I don’t think anything will ever happen…  and I kind of don’t want to talk about it, sorry…”

“That’s okay.” Pike shrugged. “I’m sorry it’s not working out for you, though – I really would like to see you be happy, you know?”

“I know.” Ahiru looked up and tried to smile. “Thanks… a-and how about you?”

“Nothing at all, which…” Pike’s shoulders slumped. “I… have mixed feelings about, I guess? It’s hard to know how to feel.”

“What do you mean?” Ahiru’s brows drew together in a concerned frown. “If – if you want to talk about it, that is.”

“I think you’re the only one I _can_ talk to about this, actually.” Pike let out a largely mirthless laugh. “See, the thing is… oh, where to start… well, remember how I wrote you around the time of Lilie’s engagement and said I hoped to see us both settled soon?”

“Yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “I remember that.”

“Well, thing is… ah, I mean, it’s not really fair to say I was being dishonest… more like…” Pike pursed her lips. “More like I didn’t _know_ , really, that I was only wanting that because that’s what my parents want for me. At least, I’m pretty sure that’s what the case is.”

“You… you mean you don’t actually want to get married?” Ahiru’s eyes widened. “N-not that there’s anything wrong with that…”

“I’m not entirely sure, but right now I think that yeah… that’s what I want. To not be married, that is.” Pike shrugged. “See, all of Lilie’s talk and being exposed to all this wedding planning and discussion of married life set off something in me… I think I’ve always been a bit uncomfortable with the idea of marrying and living life like my mother or Lilie or countless other women, I just didn’t really think about it before. Maybe I just thought I wasn’t ready, and maybe that’s still the case. I don’t know. All I know is that right now I don’t want to get married to anyone.”

“What do you want to do instead, then?” Ahiru asked.

“I don’t know.” Pike looked down at her lap. “See, I keep thinking about how you’re in training to have a career, and I suppose it makes me wistful… I know you didn’t have a choice in the matter, I haven’t forgotten that,” she added hastily. “But it does make me have thoughts about what occupation _I_ could take up. I do come into my money next year, so I’ve been seriously thinking that when that happens I’ll scarper with it.”

“Well, if you waited for that you wouldn’t need a career,” Ahiru pointed out.

“True, but I think I might get too bored otherwise.” Pike brushed a stray piece of lint off her dress. “I’ve always liked singing, and I’ve had voice training, maybe I’ll take up the stage. Could be fun.”

“That’s not respectable at all.” Ahiru giggled. “Your mother would hate that.”

“Which is another reason to do it.” Pike grinned. “Not that I’m ungrateful or anything, and I don’t hate her, don’t go thinking that. Just…” She sighed. “She has a very specific idea for my future that I don’t want, and as good and loving as she can be, she doesn’t like to listen to me. She thinks she knows what’s best for me and won’t entertain any notion that I might actually be a better judge of what I want and what’s good for me.”

“Yeah… I noticed that she doesn’t like to listen to other points of view on stuff.” Ahiru swallowed. “Not – not that I’m trying to speak ill of her, just…”

“You’re talking about this morning, right?” Pike asked. Ahiru nodded. “Yeah… sorry about that. Once she’s got something fixed in her head – like the idea that fairies are made up, for instance – there’s no swaying her. And it pissed me off too, cause I found that story you were telling really interesting.”

“Oh, about the border and the changeling child?”

“Yeah!” Pike’s eyes lit up. “Did it really happen?”

“I don’t know.” Ahiru shook her head. “I just know that it’s something people say happen. My teacher Edel thinks it’s a changeling story that got tacked on later, but Fakir – that is, her nephew a-and my friend, the one who told me the story… he seems to think it really did. He was talking about there always being some kind of truth to stories. Something like that, anyway.”

“Your friend Fakir, huh?” Pike raised an eyebrow. “He wouldn’t be the one you’re sweet on, would he?”

“He – he…” Ahiru blushed. “I…”

“That I will take as a definite yes.” Pike grinned again. “Your reaction speaks volumes, sorry. But tell me about him! If you don’t mind.”

“Well, he…” Warmth fluttered up in Ahiru. “He used to be a knight, until his hand got hurt when he was fighting bandits last November, so he resigned and now he works as a blacksmith… he can be really cranky and rude sometimes, but he’s also kind and smart and caring, and a worrywart, and silly and hard on himself… but I really like spending time with him and talking to him and we really trust each other a lot…”

“Not bad, not bad.” Pike nodded approvingly. “What’s he look like? Handsome?”

“Very.” Ahiru’s blush deepened, and she had to avert her eyes from Pike. “He – he’s tall, and… well, you can probably imagine what a knight would be built like…” She giggled. “And he has long black hair, and green eyes, and brown skin, and a really great smile, and… and yeah.”

Pike raised an eyebrow just as Ahiru risked a glance over at her. “Herr Drosselmeyer would never have approved _that_ match.”

“I know that! But… but he’s dead, and… it’s because of him that I’m in Goldkrone at all.” Ahiru flushed. “Not – not that I regret it or think it’s a bad thing, just… just…”

“The irony, kind of.” Pike nodded. “If you _do_ end up with this guy, Herr Drosselmeyer would roll over in his grave if he knew, but he’d have no one but himself to ‘blame’ because of his own actions that took you to Goldkrone.” Her eyes softened. “Which, I know you don’t want to talk about that aspect of the situation, but I really do hope it happens, just for your sake… and I hope you’re happy being there now regardless.”

“I am, I really am!” Ahiru nodded vigorously. “Don’t worry!

“Okay, good, cause –” Pike cut herself off as music began to play from somewhere. “Oh, sounds like it’s starting, and we didn’t even notice… we’ll talk more later tonight, or tomorrow!”

The music they’d heard turned out to merely be a warm-up for the musicians; when the real thing began, it was much more bombastic. Horns and drums seemed to be at war with each other for which could be the loudest as Femio and Lilie made their appearances and began to walk towards the center of the circle, all other sounds lost in the din. Ahiru wound up covering her ears and averting her eyes from Lilie’s dress, which indeed gave off a blinding sparkle. Femio’s costume was only slightly better – it did have the advantage of not threatening to make one see spots in their vision for minutes afterward, but then again it was so hideously garish that one might wish for those spots if only to blot out the horrifying vision of purple and gold accented with a crown of red roses on his head identical to the one perched atop Lilie’s flowing blonde curls. His hair turned out to be violet as well, and his face somehow even more smug and self-assured than the expression depicted in the statue’s likeness. The music – if it could be called that – stopped only when they reached each other. A priestess performed the blessing, and then it was time for the vows. As Ahiru had dreaded they’d been written by Lilie and Femio themselves, and so a lengthy exchange proceeded in which they spoke in overwrought language of sins and tragedy and devotion to each other even from beyond the grave. When it came to an end Ahiru finally saw the purpose of the bags suspended from the arbor: servants discreetly tugged on the strings, releasing a shower of rose petals over the happy couple. Amidst cheering they shouted for everyone to follow them to the reception area, and led the way after climbing into a litter brought over and then carried off by four burly men.

Not having servants to tote them there Ahiru, Pike, and the rest of the guests were forced to walk over to the tent, which looked even more flamboyantly garish the closer one got. By the time they reached it Femio and Lilie were already seated at the table at the very back of the tent; it, and all the others, bore tablecloths of gold velvet edged with lace and adorned with sequins. The burly servants and the chair they’d carried them in on had long since vanished. Everyone filed in and got shown to their tables by a different set of hired hands, and once all had been seated Femio stood up, champagne flute in hand.

“My deepest of thanks to you, honored guests, friends and family, for joining us on this most momentous of days!” Behind him a servant used a feather-trimmed fan to scatter rose petals in the air from a basket filled with them, and an unseen violinist played a deceptively lovely refrain. “Would that I could share our joy with the entirety of the world! But no, I cannot… sinful as it is, I am restricted to only this small gathering.” His lower lip wobbled. “Alas! But it doesn’t diminish the honor that you all do for us by attending, so I once again thank you, and beg your forgiveness for my sinful inability to include more.” He raised his glass. “To amour!”

“To amour!” echoed the gathered crowd, though Ahiru said nothing. She couldn’t be sure, but it didn’t seem like Pike had spoken either. When the cheering died down, more servants trailed in bearing plates of food that smelled tantalizingly good. Each guest was provided with one, and their places had already been set with cutlery and napkins; drinks were provided as well, tall champagne flutes for everyone along with glasses of water. Ahiru eyed the champagne with trepidation, and decided to stick to the water. Somehow, altering her perceptions of the world in even the slightest did not seem like a good idea in such surroundings. It might give her nightmares later, after all.

She found herself a bit conflicted as she began eating. True, the food was of excellent quality – the Holsts clearly employed talented chefs, and the worry that Pike had expressed a couple days ago about the meal being composed of bizarre dishes hadn’t come to pass. All the same, though, she found herself missing the simpler, homier cooking she was used to in Goldkrone, when Edel or Fakir made lunch. A pang rose up in her as she realized that they surely must be eating the midday meal even now, whether together or separately.

The cake was cut and served after the completion of the main meal, and once it too had been consumed the same servants as before filed in and whisked their plates away, refilling the champagne flutes for anyone who requested more. It then became time to mingle and socialize, a prospect Ahiru wasn’t entirely thrilled about. She was out of her element again, after all, with the bulk of the guests being total strangers. And upper crust ones at that. She gulped down the last of her water and reluctantly got up, wondering if it would annoy Pike if she hovered near her for the entirety of the reception.

“Ahiru! Pike! My darlings!” Lilie’s joyful cry interrupted Ahiru’s musings. “Do stay a moment, for I must formally introduce you to my wonderful new husband.”

“I’ve already met him,” Pike muttered, but Lilie didn’t hear as she pulled Femio over.

“Femio, my sweet, here are my nearest and dearest friends.” Lilie beamed at them. “You already know Pike, of course…”

“Charmed, as usual.” He smiled at Pike, who nodded back at him, the “get me out of here” look in her eyes clearly going unnoticed by anyone but Ahiru.

“And this is Ahiru.” Lilie seized Ahiru’s hand and Femio’s hand, and pressed them together in a bizarre mockery of a handshake. “Sweet, fair Ahiru, who was forced by unspeakable _tragedy_ to move ever so far away from me, leaving me bereft.” She pressed the back of her hand to her forehead and let out a deep sigh. “I was inconsolable in the wake of our trio’s being reduced to a duo, until you rescued me from my loneliness and showed me a love unlike that which anyone in the world can dare lay claim to. Oh! How incomparable you are!”

“Yes… it is my greatest sin, to be so far above the likes of all other mortal men, while being condemned to share their fate and one day depart from the earth, leaving all who knew me devastated in my wake.” Femio’s lower lip quivered again, and Ahiru could see his eyes shimmering as if with tears. “I am too undeservingly blessed to have found such a union with one such as yourself!”

“Oh, you _flatterer!_ ” Lilie batted her eyelashes. “But in any case, do say hello to Ahiru. And Ahiru, this is my gloriously sinful beloved, Femio Holst.”

“It’s… nice to meet you…” Ahiru glanced down at their hands, not sure if it would be rude to pull hers out of his grasp.

“Delighted, lovely one.” Femio lifted her hand and brushed his lips across the back of it, chastely, before releasing her. “The pleasure is all mine, maiden with the eyes of truth.”

“The… what?” Ahiru tilted her head. “Eyes of what?”

“Oh, Ahiru, that is something I’ve forgotten to explain!” Lilie clasped her hands together. “My dearest Femio has, you see, a form of clairvoyance. He can tell what gifts others have.”

“And you, friend of my luminous lady, have the ability to see past the surface and discover the truth within.” Femio nodded. “It will serve you well, mark my words! If I can atone for my many sins in any way, oh heavens, let it be this: that others are awakened to their potential through me! I alone can save so many… though I cannot save myself.” He raised his arms above his head. “Oh, what a cruel fate to befall me so! I must be judged!”

“Not on your wedding day, I should think – the heavens will surely give you a reprieve on this most blessed of days.” Lilie shook her head. “But in any case, my darling, even though you cannot save yourself, take heart that it is a beautiful tragedy the poets will sing of long after you leave this earth.” She sighed. “But that will not be for a long time, and until then I think I can keep your judgment at bay! I will try my best to save you, and if I fail, at least we will be judged together.”

“Oh, Lilie, mon cherie…” Femio clasped both her hands in his, his eyes sparkling. “How romantic! To suffer together, rather than alone as I’d feared! I cannot ask for anything more, for to do so would be the truest of sins!”

“Indeed.” Lilie’s eyes gleamed. “But now, I feel we must hasten to our first dance, for we have kept our most eager guests waiting long enough. It would be a dreadful thing to delay it any further…”

“Ah! Yes, you are right! Montand!” Femio snapped his fingers, and in an instant the servant Ahiru had seen fanning rose petals appeared at his side. “Fetch _that!_ My lady and I must go without delay to the dancing!”

“Yes, Master Femio!”

He raced off, and Ahiru had only a brief moment to wonder what “that” was, for Montand soon returned leading a massive bull in. She could do nothing but stare as Femio and Lilie climbed atop it as though it were a horse, and rode off towards the area of the gardens that had been turned into a space for dancing.

“But… it’s… not even that far away…” Ahiru gaped as she followed them, feeling in somewhat of a daze. “They could have walked…”

“Ah, but see, that’s the _logical_ approach that you or I would opt for.” Pike laughed dryly. “I’m not sure logic factors much into _their_ decisions, though.”

“I guess not…” Ahiru paused at the edge of the dancing area, watching as Femio and Lilie dismounted the bull. Montand led it off, and once it was safely away Femio gestured to the musicians. Frenetic music then burst forth from their instruments as they started to play, and as it did Femio whirled Lilie around in an equally fast-paced dance.

The dancing went on for quite some time. Femio and Lilie danced to song after song, never seeming to tire, and even led a group dance. Ahiru chose to sit each one out, keeping a safe distance that she increased when Lilie called out for a group number. She remembered all too well how that kind of thing had gone for her on Halloween, and preferred to try to avoid it this time around. Especially since she didn’t have Fakir here to help her or talk to her, a fact that caused yet more twinges of melancholy. Pike eventually abandoned her to join in the dancing, her confidence evidently bolstered by the champagne she’d had. Ahiru watched her until she disappeared from sight, and then slipped away to go look at the flowers.

Evidently she wasn’t meant to tread into that space, if the strange looks the servants gave her as they cleaned up and took down the arbor and removed the chairs was any indication. But since they made no effort to stop her, Ahiru shored up her courage and kept going. She found that the famous Holst rose gardens were indeed impressive, with roses in many colors all over the place, all emitting a delicately beautiful scent. It only made her longing for home all that much deeper, however – for she couldn’t help but think not only of Freya’s lovingly tended flowers, but also of the rose-strewn meadow with the well that Fakir liked so much. A blush rose to her cheeks as she recalled that day, their first horseback ride together. How far their relationship had come since then!

Lilie had called it a tragedy that propelled her to move to Goldkrone, but Ahiru couldn’t agree with that assessment. As cruel and awful as it seemed sometimes to feel that way, she couldn’t mourn Herr Drosselmeyer, for he had never been truly kind to her. In addition, he’d had machinations for her future that she surely would’ve been made miserable by. And like Pike had commented, he would never have presented someone like Fakir to her as a possible husband. If he’d survived long enough, doubtlessly her guardian would have married her off to the ones who _did_ fit his criteria, and she’d be living in one of their cold manors now, instead of Edel’s cozy house. Ahiru shuddered. It barely merited thinking of, for it would never come to pass, but all the same it sent shivers of fear down her spine.

No, what had befallen her was actually a blessing masquerading as misfortune. Not that it wouldn’t have been nice to still have the inheritance she should have had, but her life was so happy now, and she was making a reliable salary and gaining skills that would set her up for life, so it more than balanced out in the end. Goldkrone was much more suited to her than this city was, and she was happy there in a way she could never have been if she’d stayed. Those awful months of uncertainty immediately following Herr Drosselmeyer’s death hadn’t been fun, but she considered them worth enduring now, for that was the price she’d paid for the happiness she now had. Fear had given way to security and stability, and she’d found some of the greatest friendships of her life; how could she call that a tragedy? Even if she and Fakir couldn’t be together romantically, she would never trade any of her time with him for money. No, she was most definitely better off now, no matter what Lilie said.

She wandered for so long musing on various things, that by the time she returned to the dance floor the crowd had thinned as people started to depart. Femio and Lilie were still dancing, somehow, but when she found Pike the other girl was yawning. “Hey… there you are…” She yawned again. “Where’ve you been?”

“Oh… I… I was looking around the rose gardens…” Ahiru frowned. “Am – am I late or something?”

“Nah, just…” Pike waved her hand. “Maybe we could go now, since you’re back? I think that champagne and all the dancing are taking their toll on me.”

“You don’t want to look at the gardens?” Ahiru asked. “I thought you were interested.”

“Not _that_ interested.” Pike grinned sleepily. “Besides, I’m sure I’ll be back at some point, even if they are going to live up north.”

“True.” Ahiru glanced at the newlywed couple. “Do you think we should say goodbye before we go?”

“Oh yeah.” Pike made a face. “Time to get squashed like a grape… I just hope no one throws rose petals on us at the same time.”

They headed over to Lilie and Femio, who exclaimed about how tragic it was that they had to leave already. Lilie in particular wept dramatically, and gave life-threateningly tight hugs to both Ahiru and Pike while babbling on about how they must write, though she would be too busy with her honeymoon to answer immediately, and true to Pike’s prediction she declared that the two of them would dine together here at least once before she and her darling Femio departed for the northern climes. After what felt like an eternity they finally managed to pry themselves away and headed back to the house. Once the driver had been notified of their intent to return home it took only a short time to bring the carriage around again, and they were off to the Autenberg’s manor.

Pike went straight to her bedroom once they got back; she instructed a maid to bring tea and some food to her chambers, and sighed over how she’d have a nice bath after dining and then go right to sleep. Ahiru ate a light meal in the dinner room alone, for both of Pike’s parents were still at whatever engagements they’d had for the evening, and then retired to her room as well. She stayed up for some time, watching the sun set and thinking wistfully of home, and then read by lamplight till she was too tired.

If she had dreams while she slept she did not remember them, and in any case woke to find that Pike felt under the weather due to her champagne consumption. She had no desire to get out of bed for at least several hours, and so that put to a halt the plans she and Ahiru had had for the day. That was a little disappointing, but in all truth Ahiru was more than eager to be setting off for Goldkrone anyway, so it didn’t bother her _that_ much. She occupied herself as best she could, reading more of her book and wandering the Autenberg’s garden, and writing down things she wanted to be sure to tell Edel and Fakir when she got back. Pike emerged sometime in the middle of the afternoon, and they had tea together and talked about the wedding. At last, however, the day drew to a close, and Ahiru carefully packed all of her things before bed, making sure she’d not forgotten a single item. Excitement buzzed in her as she climbed into bed – she was finally going home tomorrow!

That said, the trip would still take the better part of two days, and that reality settled in when she got to the station the next morning. Pike and her parents bid her farewell, as they had when she’d first left for Goldkrone, and Ahiru climbed in the coach and braced herself for another long and tiring trip. The two traveling companions she had this time seemed entirely uninterested in talking to either each other or to her, so she alternated her time between reading and looking out the window. They spent the night in the same inn that Ahiru had stayed in on her first two trips, and in the morning departed for the final leg of the journey.

The closer they got to Goldkrone, the more Ahiru’s impatience to be there already grew. It felt like this last portion of the trip was taking longer, and by the time they drew up to the crossroads just before the city gates she was practically bouncing in her seat with eagerness to be there. Fear and anxiety crept in to dampen her spirits a little as she recalled her first trip through this part of the land, but no bandits swarmed out of the woods to ambush them and she breathed easier after they safely passed by and into the city. Those crossroads would never stop being spooky to her, and she was glad to be past them.

Ahiru’s excitement as the coach pulled into the station was near to boiling over, like an unattended cauldron. She took her trunk as soon as she was able, and walked as quickly as she could into the building while tugging it along on the little trolley she’d bought. Not far inside, she stopped and looked around. There were so many people here, coming and going, seeing friends and family off or welcoming them home. Who had come for her today? She scanned the crowd carefully. She didn’t see Edel, but after a moment she saw Fakir, and her heart leapt at the sight of him. He stood near a bench, obviously searching for her as well, and then their gazes met. His eyes widened and his mouth opened slightly as they looked at each other; she couldn’t read his expression, for it was one she’d never seen there before, but in the end it didn’t really matter. She took off at a run towards him, her trunk clattering along on the floor behind her.

He walked forward too, and when they reached each other Ahiru let go of her trunk and flung her arms around him. He seemed to sway on his feet a little, and she pressed her face into his chest. “I missed you,” she whispered, and her breath caught in her throat as he slipped his arms around her too, holding her close to him. “A lot.”

“I missed you too,” Fakir said softly, his voice sounding oddly tight. “Welcome home.” He drew a shaky breath, and let it out against her hair.

“Th-thank you, I…” Ahiru pulled back just enough to look up at Fakir’s face, and saw that his eyes had an odd shine to them. She frowned. “Is – is everything –”

“Ah, I see you found her first.” At the sound of Edel’s voice they sprang apart, and turned to see her heading in their direction with a smile on her face. “Hello, Ahiru. Welcome back.”

“Thanks!” Ahiru beamed at her. “It – it’s really good to be back, I missed you both so much… I can’t wait to really be back home.”

“Back to normal life, yes.” Edel chuckled. “I’m sure it was nice to be in luxurious surroundings again, after months spent here.”

“Not at all!” Ahiru shook her head. Behind her, Fakir moved to take her trunk. “I mean, not that it was _bad_ or anything, just…” She noticed what Fakir had done and turned to see him. “H-hey… you don’t have to do that, I can pull it.”

“It’s fine.” Fakir shrugged. “You’ve been lugging this around on your own, I’d like to give you a break.” His expression was back to its usual neutral state, but she couldn’t forget the strange way he’d looked at her. “Don’t worry about it.”

“O-okay… thanks…” Ahiru turned back to Edel. “Anyway, as I was saying… it was nice there and all, but… but I missed it here, I like Goldkrone and your house so much more than all the fancy places, and I missed your cooking, both of yours, and you too… it was weird to be there. I’m glad I’m back here again.”

“I’m glad to hear you like it here so much.” Edel smiled again. “You did have a good time, though, correct?”

“Yes!” Ahiru nodded. “I – I’ll tell you two about it over dinner, I even wrote down some stuff that I wanted to be sure to remember to talk about, I’ll unpack it when I get to my room.”

“Yes, let’s be off, I’m sure you’re tired after the long trip.” Edel nodded to her. “At least we’re not far from home.”

“Yeah, it’s nice to live pretty close,” Ahiru agreed as she followed Edel out of the station.

As they walked home Edel regaled her with news of all the significant and interesting things that had happened around Goldkrone while she’d been away. Fakir walked at Ahiru’s side, keeping her pace, with Edel in the lead as usual; more than a few times she thought she sensed him staring at her, but when she looked over he had his gaze straight ahead on the path. When they at last arrived at the house he brought her trunk to her room for her, and then headed to the kitchen while she unpacked. Her notes on the trip were of utmost interest to her, and after tossing her dirty clothes into her hamper she took the notebook with her and hurried to the kitchen, where Fakir and Edel had just finished putting together a dinner spread. They talked for a long while about her trip over the meal, and even afterwards, though Edel excused herself to go to bed before too much longer after eating. Fakir and Ahiru lingered at the table late into the evening discussing things, however, until the long day finally caught up with her. They bid each other goodnight at her bedroom door, and she climbed into bed utterly exhausted and yet deeply content.

It really was good to be home.


	23. Chapter 23

June soon swept in to replace May, bringing with it the fullness of summer. The weather warmed, the days seemed to lengthen even further, and the market filled to brimming over with delectable seasonal produce. Edel’s attentions turned to canning and pickling it in preparation for the colder months, and so more than once she and Ahiru borrowed a cart from Charon and used it to bring home a surplus for that purpose. That kept them busy for the first couple weeks or so, filling part of a corner of the basement reserved for food storage with some of the season’s bounty. More, Edel told her, would be done near the end of summer, to preserve the food available then, as well as during the harvests of autumn. They also kept a close eye on their own gardens, taking good care of their thriving herbs and trimming them as needed to keep them growing while using the cuttings in various ways.

Near the end of the month awaited two things that were more exciting, however: Ahiru’s birthday and the summer solstice. As it happened, her birthday on the twenty-second coincided with this year’s solstice, and so she would get to attend a grand celebration on that day as per the town tradition. A feast was always held in a wide open field just outside town, near the farms, followed by a large bonfire and dancing into the night. The plan was to give Ahiru her gifts in the mid-afternoon, accompanied by some tea, and then ride Charon’s cart to where the solstice celebration would take place.

Ahiru’s initial plan for the morning of her birthday had been to spend it as she would any other morning: by working with Edel on whatever they had going that day, be it brewing or bottling or preserving. After all, it wasn’t even a day she’d normally have off if it wasn’t her birthday, so why shouldn’t she treat it as a normal day up until the festivities began? Edel insisted, however, that as her birthday only came around once a year and she worked hard every other day she more than deserved to have  a morning off. She’d have time to herself to relax before heading out, and be more able to ready herself to her liking as well. Ahiru protested at first, but after all these things had been pointed out to her by not only Edel but Fakir as well (the conversation took place over the breakfast table on the twenty-second), she reluctantly agreed. Privately she didn’t see what was so special about her nineteenth birthday, as it wasn’t exactly a significant number by anyone’s ranking, but she also felt a little relieved nevertheless to have the free time. She wanted to look really nice for the party later, after all – it wasn’t to celebrate her, but that wasn’t the point. It was the first public celebration here in Goldkrone that she’d attended since the Harvest Festival, and she was very excited about it.

She did win the battle about helping with the breakfast dishes, though, and after she’d finished doing that she headed back to her room to begin getting ready. She bathed herself again, using some scented bath salts, and washed and dried her hair before brushing it and beginning to put it up in a braided bun. She braided yellow ribbons into it, as well as sprigs of baby’s breath, to go with the lemon yellow gown she’d selected last night for this occasion. It had been a tough choice between that and a favorite blue one, but the yellow had won in the end because it seemed a more appropriate color for the celebration of the sun that was the summer solstice. Besides, the shade reminded her also of ducklings, and that made her smile. She’d even seen some ducklings following their mothers around lately, and had been overjoyed at each sighting. Her favorite had been when she and Fakir had ridden to a small creek – the same one they’d visited on New Year’s – and seen a family of ducks swimming by. That had been such a lovely day.

That said, there was definitely something subtly different about the way Fakir had been acting around her ever since she’d returned from Lilie’s wedding. Not a _bad_ different, but different nonetheless. She couldn’t quite put her finger on what it was, exactly, and if asked wouldn’t be able to explain it, but there was _something_ there all the same. Something in his eyes, his voice, in the way he seemed to more often want to spend time with her. Or maybe that last one was her imagination, as he’d spent plenty of time with her before her trip. But it did at least _seem_ like he came home for lunch more often these days, and they went on lots of rides together, and walks too. Though it was just as likely that some of that was a product of the changing weather, too – the warmer, longer days and less frequent rain made it easier to spend time outside. And given that he’d led such an active life with lots of outdoor activity as a knight, it made sense that he’d get restless and want to keep up some of that when he could. Being cooped up in the forge all day and at home so much during the wet winter and spring, it seemed natural that he’d want to take advantage of summer conditions to go riding as often as possible for his own sake and Asim’s too, and since she was still learning there was no reason not to take her along. Summers here didn’t usually get quite so hot as they did in other places so it was very pleasant to be out of doors, even if it was just to sit in the shade of a large tree and read a good book.

Ahiru had only just finished putting up her hair, and was about to check it over for any finishing touches that needed doing or errors to be fixed when a knock came on her door. “Ahiru?”

“Fakir?” She turned towards the door. “What is it?”

“The – Hermia came by, with mail for you. Do you want me to leave it somewhere for you, or… are you… can you take it now? I mean, do you want to?”

“I – I’ll get it! Hold on…” Ahiru grabbed her robe from where it lay on the end of her bed and hastily wrapped it around herself. It wouldn’t do, after all, to show Fakir what she looked like in just a chemise. Her face heated up at just the thought. Tying the robe securely around her small frame, she hurried across the room and opened the door. “Thanks, sorry… I didn’t even hear the door…”

“It’s fine.” Fakir seemed to blush a little too as he looked down at her. “Here… these are addressed to you.” He held out two small packages wrapped in brown paper, with letters attached to them. “I think they’re from your friends…”

“Oh! Thank you!” Ahiru took them from him, feeling her heart flutter as their hands brushed. “I – I guess I’ll read the letters now, and… maybe open them later, when everyone else gives me their gifts? I don’t know…”

“They’re your gifts.” Fakir shrugged. “You have the right to open them whenever you want. Don’t feel obligated to open them in front of everyone else if you want to keep them private.”

“Oh no, I don’t think I would… although knowing Lilie she might’ve gotten me something really weird…” Ahiru frowned down at the flat, rectangular package that had an envelope with Lilie’s handwriting tied to it. It _looked_ normal, but… “M-maybe I’ll just open them here… and if they’re not too weird I’ll show you later, you know I wouldn’t keep stuff from you… or even if they are weird maybe we could laugh about them or something…”

“All right.” Fakir smiled slightly at her. “I’ll let you get back to what you were doing, then – see you later.”

“See you!” Ahiru beamed up at him before closing the door as he turned his back and walked away. She then glanced down at the packages in her hands, and swallowed. Pike’s she could count on to be something good, but Lilie’s? Who knew what she was in for there.

Better to face it now and get it over with in the privacy of her own room, though; the idea of unwrapping something truly bizarre and mortifying in front of Fakir and everyone else (but especially Fakir) didn’t bear thinking about. So Ahiru took the two packages over to her bed and sat down with them. After some consideration she decided to get Lilie’s done with first, and save the more pleasant surprise of Pike’s gift for last. She took the letter off first, and opened it up. It surprisingly wasn’t as long as her usual missives, perhaps a side effect of her busier life as a newly wedded woman? She didn’t mind either way.

_To my darling Ahiru on that second grandest of days, her birthday (the first grandest shall of course be your wedding day)_

_Greetings! Happy birthday! And how is this day finding you, dear Ahiru? As pleasantly as the one on which I am writing this finds me, I hope! As I put pen to paper, I am scheduled for a delightful luncheon with friends and my beloved Femio, after which we will ride about town and shop before returning home and preparing for a ball. Ah! The life of a married society woman! So busy! I almost envy you the scores of free time you must have. Almost, but not quite! For I enjoy my new life even more than I’d dreamed I would, and I do ever so wish for it to be yours as well. Alas that it is not! Pike has told me, after much persuasion, that you still have yet to find someone who has caught your eye, much less to be anywhere close to being engaged. Oh, Ahiru, my tragic darling – I know that you have no hope of ensnaring someone so magnificent as my Femio, partially because his equal does not exist in this world, but do not let that drive you to despair! You must keep trying and failing until at last you succeed and find a love perhaps not so grand as mine, but worthy of you, at the very least. My wish is for this birthday gift of mine to assist you in that task. Use it well!_

_With all my deepest devotion, Lilie_

Ahiru blinked a few times at the letter, and then reread it again to be sure she’d really taken all that in properly. Her overriding thought, when she’d done that, was that at least Pike had kept her word and not spoken at all of her confession about Fakir at the wedding. That her friend could stick to her promises even in the face of Lilie’s often… _forceful_ persuasion techniques was heartening. It didn’t ease her trepidation about what lurked inside the deceptively innocent-looking brown paper, however. Ahiru gulped, and steeled herself to face it down.

The paper hid a box embossed with gold lettering that spelled out the name of a bookstore. She opened that up and almost instantly recoiled at the tome inside. Titled _The Food of Love: Recipes, Spells, and Poems to Aid in the Attraction and Keeping of Romance In Your Life_ , its leather cover had been dyed a lurid shade of pink Ahiru was not entirely certain could be found in nature. It took her a moment to gather enough courage to gingerly take it out of the box; she deposited well away from her on the bed once she had. She’d think about what to do with it later.

Now, though, it was time to read Pike’s letter and see what she’d sent her. The envelope had been attached to a much smaller, square-shaped box, which was promising. Ahiru tore the envelope open and began to read the letter. True to Pike, it was short and to the point as always.

_Hey, Ahiru! Happy birthday! I hope this gets there on time – I tried to arrange it so it’d arrive on your actual birthday, I hope it’s not late! Anyway, I also hope you’re having a good day, and that you like this gift. I won’t spoil it, but there’s several uses for it, hopefully at least one will benefit you. Good luck, and have a great day!_

_Love, Pike_

Ahiru smiled at the letter before setting it down. She’d have to write both of them thank you notes – and struggle to be as tactful as possible in the one for Lilie – and she’d assure Pike that yes, the gift did arrive right on time. She set the letter on the bed and then began to open the present. Beneath the paper was a box from the gem sellers’ shop that she remembered visiting on her last day before leaving for Goldkrone; lifting the lid revealed a modest-sized and well-polished stone of a gentle, pale pink much more to her liking than the hue of Lilie’s book. Under it was a note card that explained that the stone was rose quartz, and listed off all of the uses for it and effects it had. One of them was, admittedly, for help in finding a new lover, but although she blushed she didn’t feel quite as mortified as she did about Lilie’s efforts to ‘help’ in that arena. After all, Pike knew of her feelings for Fakir and genuinely wanted her to be happy and to not get her heart broken. Whereas Lilie… well, Lilie was Lilie. Little more than that needed to be said.

Ahiru set the rose quartz and its accompanying card in a place of honor on her chest of drawers, and hid the ridiculous book in the last compartment, beneath some winter clothes and bedsheets. That would have to do for now. She then resumed checking over her hair, and put on her dress and some perfume, as well as her mother’s necklace. She still had some time to fill even after finishing all that, so she sat down to peruse the book on tarot cards she’d just started learning from. Her education on the divinatory arts had been disrupted a little by her trip last month, but not too badly – Edel had planned accordingly for it as soon as she’d set her trip up, and taught her smaller, simpler things in the weeks leading up to it. After her return they’d taken a brief break so that she could readjust to her regular lessons, as well as to get a head start on the preservation of the summer produce, but last week they’d begun studying the tarot, which Ahiru found endlessly fascinating. Challenging, yes, with so many cards and so much complexity to keep track of, but fascinating nonetheless. She couldn’t wait to begin doing readings for people on her own, even though that day was a long way off.

She studied the book until it was time for lunch. Feeling slightly more sure of her growing knowledge on the subject, Ahiru marked her place in the book and put it back on her table before heading out of her room. Lunch today would be lighter than usual, to allow room in their stomachs for the truly massive feast that was to come later.

Ahiru got to the kitchen in time to see Edel finish putting out a spread similar to that which they normally had at dinner. Fakir was already seated and reading a book of his own, but he looked up from it and smiled as he saw her enter. Ahiru smiled back at him. “Hey, Fakir.”

“Hey.” He put a bookmark in – the one she’d made him, she noticed with a flutter of joy in her stomach – and pushed the book aside so he could serve himself some lunch. “So did you open your friends’ gifts?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded, and joined him at the table in her usual spot across from him. “They were… well, one of them was good, but the other… well, it was weird, like I said it might be.” She blushed.

“Heh. Well, you don’t have to talk about that one if you don’t want to.” Fakir piled some cheese and greens atop a slice of bread, and topped it off with some cold cuts. “I understand getting embarrassing gifts.”

“O-okay, thank you!” Ahiru sagged a little in relief before beginning to assemble a sandwich of her own. “I’ll tell you about the other one, though – Pike got me a piece of rose quartz, and it’s really pretty, and she included a little card that came with it that explains what all the uses are… or maybe the store just put that in there, I don’t know…”

“That _is_ a good gift,” Edel said as she poured tea for them. “I have used rose quartz before, Ahiru, and can assure you of its many beneficial properties and effects. Your friend has good taste in stones.”

“Yeah.” Ahiru took a bite of her sandwich and chewed on it while she thought. “I feel like… like I’m a little closer to her now, after the wedding,” she said once she’d swallowed. “She changed while I was away, and we talked a lot while I was there… it’s nice.”

“I’m glad.” Fakir smiled. “You deserve to have good friends in your life who treat you well.”

“Thank you. B-but, you’re still my best friend, don’t worry!” Ahiru added hastily. “I don’t want you to think I don’t still feel close to you and trust you the most…”

“Don’t worry, I didn’t – I’m not hurt.” Fakir shook his head. “If anything, I… well, I guess the best way of putting it is that I don’t feel like I should be your only friend. You should have as many as you’d like. I’m not threatened by other people.” He took a sip of his tea. “I don’t want you to be lonely.”

“I’m not. Not at all.” Ahiru smiled again. “Don’t worry about that.”

They continued chatting about nothing much in particular as the meal went on; mostly things about the weather, and the evening of celebration to come, and the things they’d all been doing lately. Fakir complained about just how stiflingly hot it could get in the forge now that the weather was warming up, for one thing – although it wasn’t overwhelmingly warm outside, it nevertheless contributed to the heat inside. It had been nice to be inside a cozy, warm forge during the winter and early spring, but now? Not so much. Ahiru and Edel both sympathized, for though it wasn’t quite the same, they too had been feeling the effects of the season when they had to work with hot cauldrons. Despite that, though, none of them were in any real hurry to get through summer and move onto autumn, preferring instead to try and enjoy the positives of the season and take life slowly, one day at a time.

They separated after lunch and clean-up to resume their own activities, at least for a while. Just before mid-afternoon Ahiru exited her room to head for the sitting room, and since Fakir had just left his own room he joined her. They’d barely gotten there when the bell rang, and hastened to the front door to find Charon and Raetsel there.

“Hello, Ahiru.” Raetsel smiled. “I was just heading down the path when Charon left his house, so we walked together… anyway, happy birthday!” She leaned forward and embraced her.

“Thank you!” Ahiru returned the hug and then pulled back. “A-and thank you both for coming, you didn’t have to…”

“Nonsense.” Charon shook his head. “When Edel said it was your birthday and to come give you well-wishes, of course I wasn’t going to be rude and refuse, and I’d bet it’s the same for Raetsel.”

“Yes, though I certainly have more than well-wishes to give.” Raetsel held up a box and grinned. “Oh, but – oh dear, I’m sorry, Fakir, I didn’t see you there. Too focused on the birthday girl, I suppose.” She winked.

“That’s fine.” Fakir shrugged. “Hey, Raetsel, Charon.”

“I hope you got Ahiru something too,” Raetsel remarked as she walked in, Charon following.  “Even your father managed to get something together, terrible at gift-giving as he is. His words, not mine,” Raetsel added with a laugh.

“Of course I did.” Fakir folded his arms and scowled. “What do you take me for? I’m not that inconsiderate that I’d neglect to get Ahiru something for her birthday.”

“Calm down, calm down, I’m just making sure.” Raetsel patted her hair. “Where’s Edel? Making the tea, I assume?”

“Yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “You want to come to the sitting room and wait for her? It shouldn’t take her too much longer.”

“Sounds good, I’d love to be off my feet.” Raetsel sighed, even as she followed Ahiru and Fakir towards the sitting room. “ _What_ a long walk, and the warmer weather makes it start to get a bit uncomfortable by the end. Not too badly, of course, but I shudder to think of July.” She did shudder now. “We’ve sometimes had heat waves, you know, and all the weather forecasters say we could again this year.”

“Oh dear. It’s been bad enough in the forge lately as it is.” Charon winced.

“Y-yeah, Fakir was just talking about that at lunch.” Ahiru waited for the two guests to sit down before seating herself beside Fakir on one of the two sofas. Raetsel, she noticed, took an armchair and left an empty space beside Charon on the other sofa. “It can get really hot when we’re brewing potions or doing food preserving too.”

“Oh _yes_ ,” Raetsel said with feeling. “It’s been canning season at my house too, so I know what you mean. It pays off in the colder months, of course, but when you’re living through it things can be unbearable. I don’t envy the jam-makers.” She shuddered again.

“We have been doing a bit of that as well, I’m afraid,” Edel said with a chuckle as she walked in bearing a tray laden with tea cups, a steaming teapot, a jar of honey, some spoons, and a jug of cream. “You’re right – it can be unpleasantly hot.” She began to pour the tea.

“Oh, I don’t know how you stand it. Any of you,” Raetsel added. “It must be an absolute _nightmare_ in the forge. Then again, you have more freedom about what you wear than we ladies do, so I suppose that mitigates it some.” She laughed, and seemed to look right at Ahiru just as she blushed, having put two and two together.

“To some degree, I suppose.” Charon shrugged. “Young Lysander never seems to even _feel_ the heat, much less complain of it. I’m torn between marveling at his fortitude and envying it.” He laughed and scratched the back of his head. “But anyway – how’s your birthday been so far, Ahiru?”

“It’s been good, thank you!” Ahiru finished putting honey and cream in her tea, and took a sip. “I wanted to work on stuff this morning but Edel wouldn’t let me, so I just spent the time getting ready and reading… I’m really excited for later, I’ve never been to a midsummer celebration before!”

“Oh, you’re sure to have a marvelous time, then.” Raetsel took a sip of tea. “Not that it’s less fun when you’ve been before, but there’s something about attending your first that has a special appeal to it, you know?”

“Oh, definitely!” Ahiru nodded. “And the fact that it’s happening on my birthday this time makes it even _more_ special…”

“Indeed. It won’t happen that way every year, so be sure to savor it this time.” Edel sipped her tea, and then set her cup down. “Now then, shall we give Ahiru her gifts?”

“Oooh! Yes!” Raetsel clapped her hands together. “Does anyone mind if I start?” No one objected, so Raetsel got up and handed Ahiru the box she’d brought with her. “Here, Ahiru – I hope you like this gift.”

“I – I’m sure I will!” Ahiru looked down at it; the box felt heavy on her lap, and had been wrapped in yellow cloth with a blue ribbon tied neatly around it. She undid the ribbon and pulled the cloth free, then lifted the lid. Inside sat an assortment of seven candles in various sizes and colors, and a subtle fragrance wafted up from them. “Ooooh… these are so pretty!” Ahiru beamed at them, and then at Raetsel. “Thank you, Raetsel! I really like them!”

“You’re welcome, Ahiru, I’m glad.” Raetsel smiled back at her. “These are some of my most popular kinds during the summer – people love to burn them and enjoy a candlelit evening, not to mention a relaxing, seasonal scent. I thought you might enjoy them as well.”

“I’m sure I will!” Ahiru cast one more admiring glance at them before replacing the lid and setting it aside. “O-okay, so, um… who’s next?”

“I’ll go next, if no one minds.” Charon raised his hand and chuckled. “Best to get the disappointment over with early.” He stood up and brought a wider, thinner box over to her.

“I’m sure I won’t be disappointed, don’t be silly!” She untied the pink ribbon and pulled away the white cloth before lifting the lid. Within it she found a set of measuring spoons and paring knives, obviously handmade. “Ooh… my own set…”

“Yeah, I thought you might like having your own.” Charon scratched the back of his head, a sheepish look on his face. “I was honestly stumped, and then I remembered something you said about practical gifts and I thought… well, maybe you’d like one. So I made some. Sorry if it’s not exciting, though.”

“No, no! It’s good!” Ahiru shook her head. “They’re really nice, and I can tell you worked hard and that they’ll serve me well for a long time. Please don’t worry!”

“Ha, okay, that makes me feel better.” Charon smiled. “I guess you’re up now, one of you?” He glanced back and forth between Edel and Fakir.

“You go ahead, Edel,” Fakir said, before she could speak. “I don’t mind.”

“All right.” Edel stood, and got two boxes from a nearby table. “Here, Ahiru – this one is mine.” She laid one on Ahiru’s lap. “And this one is Fakir’s.” She put the other box beside her feet, and then resumed her seat.

“Okay…” Ahiru tugged at the white ribbon, and let the pale purple cloth fall free of the box. Taking off the lid uncovered three tall, narrow bottles firmly corked and filled with colored liquid.

“Floral waters,” Edel explained. “For your hair, or washing your face. I made three different kinds for you: rose, lavender, and lily of the valley.”

“Oooh!” Ahiru lifted one to her nose and sniffed; she could just faintly detect its flowery scent. “Thank you, I’ll have fun with these!”

“You’re welcome.” Edel smiled. “I’ll be instructing you on how to make these later in the summer, but I thought it would be good to present you with some now so you could enjoy them before then.”

“Y-yeah, this’ll be fun to use them!” Ahiru beamed back at her and cast a happy look down at the bottles. “I can’t wait to learn how to make them, too…” She put the lid back on semi-reluctantly after a minute, and exchanged the box with the one from Fakir. Her heart fluttered with anticipation, and she could feel him watching her as she carefully undid the lacy ribbon and pulled away the green cloth. She found a sturdy, beautifully crafted wooden box underneath, and lifting the lid revealed not a gift inside, but a tiny figure of a ballerina, turning round and round as a tinkling melody played. “Oh… a music box…”

“Do you like it?” Fakir sounded nervous, but also like he was trying not to be nervous. “I made it, with Charon’s help… is it all right?”

“All right?” Ahiru turned to look at him with eyes that had gone all misty in her joy. “It – it’s beautiful, Fakir! I love it! Thank you so much!” She instinctively wanted to throw her arms around him, but she wasn’t at all sure how he’d react to being hugged in front of the others like that. The station had been one thing, but this felt… _different_ somehow.

“Good.” Something like relief came into his eyes. “I’m glad, then.”

“Of course!” She gazed adoringly down at the music box, watching the ballerina pirouette until the song came to an end. Only then did she close it, and it took every ounce of willpower she had not to open it back up and watch it again. “Thank you…” She hugged it a little.

“You’re welcome.” His voice seemed to have grown softer. “Like I said, I’m glad you like it.”

“Seems we all picked winners for her.” Raetsel’s eyes seemed to gleam as she glanced back and forth between Fakir and Ahiru. “And…” Her gaze strayed to the clock on the mantel. “Hmmm, if we’re all done with our tea, maybe we should head out soon?”

“That seems like a good idea.” Edel began to gather the empty cups back onto the tray. “If you all would be good enough to wait until I wash these, we can get going.”

“Of course, of course.” Raetsel waved her hand. “We have enough time yet for that, and who wants to do washing up afterwards? I’ll even help you to make it go quicker.” She stood as well.

“Thank you, Raetsel.” Edel nodded at her. “Ahiru, perhaps you should take your gifts to your room while we clean up?”

“Y-yeah, right away!” Ahiru sprang up from her seat even as the other two headed out the door. “Although… hmmm, I’ll have to make two trips…”

“Not if I help you.” Fakir rose and stacked the box of candles atop the one containing the floral waters. “Just get the other two, and we both should manage.”

“Okay, but…” Ahiru frowned. “Won’t we be leaving poor Charon here alone? Isn’t that rude?”

“Nah, Ahiru, it’s fine.” Charon chuckled as he stood up. “I’ll just go help them with the cleaning, I should do that anyway. Just take your presents with you and don’t worry.”

“Oh, okay.” Ahiru carefully set the music box on top of the one that held the handcrafted spoons and knives, and held both close to herself as she walked. Luckily, both the sitting room door and her bedroom door had been left open, and so there were no obstacles lying in wait for her and Fakir. They set the gifts on her table, and then headed back out.

Once everyone had finished their respective tasks it was time to leave for the solstice festival. Edel locked up the house, and the five of them walked the short distance back up the road to Charon’s, where Fakir hitched Asim to the wagon. Charon, Edel, and Raetsel climbed in first, and Ahiru was just about to do the same when Fakir touched her hand. “Ahiru? Do you want to ride up – up here? With me?”

“Up… you mean in the front?” Her eyes went wide. “Is – is that okay?”

He nodded. “Yeah.  I don’t see why not. You won’t have to do anything, I just… thought you might enjoy it. You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

“No, no, of course I do!” Ahiru shook her head. “Just… could you help me up?”

“Yeah, of course.”

Fakir helped up into the seat at the front of the wagon, and then climbed up beside her and took the reins. The other three in the back were talking quietly about something, and Ahiru’s face burned – were they talking about the two of them? She tried to ignore them as Fakir got Asim going and they rode up the path.

The ride was somewhat long, but pleasant – the conversation in the back eventually became something Ahiru could hear, and even participate in. She found herself not talking as much to them, though, focused on enjoying the journey and being close to Fakir. He didn’t speak that often, focused as he was on driving them to their destination, but when he did it was almost exclusively to her. It was almost a shame to finally get to where they were going.

A couple people working there directed them to where all the other carts and wagons were being parked, and Fakir steered Asim over there. Once Raetsel, Charon, and Edel had climbed down he disembarked as well, and held his hand out to Ahiru. Hers trembled only a little as she laid it in his, using his steadiness to help herself climb down.

“Where to now?” Ahiru asked once she’d put her feet safely on the ground.

“Well, I’m going to go meet Hans and my parents.” Raetsel smoothed down her skirts. “I would have gone with them, but I did so want to give you a gift on your birthday.” She smiled warmly at Ahiru. “I’ll be seeing you all around later, though, I’m sure!”

“Okay, bye, Raetsel!” Ahiru waved at her as she left.

“The feast will be starting soon, I’d wager,” Edel remarked. “Let us go claim our places and wait, shall we?”

“Sounds good to me,” Charon remarked as he followed Edel into the field, towards where countless tables had been set up. “That tea and then the ride only increased my appetite.”

“As long as you don’t overindulge in the liquor,” Fakir muttered. Beside him, Ahiru giggled.

The tempting scent of food soon became almost overwhelming as they drew near to where everything was being set up. Various delicious aromas mingled in the late afternoon air, and Ahiru’s stomach growled in anticipation. Fakir kept pace with her, as always, and they followed Charon and Edel to a section of a table that had enough free seats for them all. Ebine soon joined them too, choosing to sit beside Edel, and the two chatted happily as everyone continued to file in and fill the seats. Ahiru looked around, but couldn’t spot Raetsel in the crowd.

They didn’t have to wait too long before the first course was brought out, though it felt like it to Ahiru’s empty stomach. The first course consisted of a few small dishes set on the tables for everyone to take from freely: tea sandwiches made with cream cheese and fresh herbs, sweet peppers stuffed with goat cheese, a spinach pie, and a layered torte made of summer vegetables and cheese. Once that course was completed, the plates were whisked away and replaced with the main course. Cold tomato soup was served beside grilled chicken and plums, and plank-smoked salmon. Ahiru, never a fan of poultry, opted for the salmon and some soup, as well as some of the bread provided. Last came dessert – lemon cake, peach pie, and iced lavender shortbread adorned with candied herbs, berries, and edible flowers. All in all it was a lavish meal unlike any she’d ever enjoyed before, and Ahiru was beyond impressed.

Everyone wandered away from the tables as they finished eating and cleanup began. Fakir got done eating first, but waited for Ahiru so that he could accompany her as they walked away into the crowd as it made its way towards where the bonfire would be lit. They somehow got separated from those who’d accompanied them, though they caught glimpses from time to time – Ahiru saw Charon talking to Lysander and two older people she presumed were his parents, and Edel and Ebine had stayed by each other’s sides as well. At one point she accidentally caught Ebine’s eye while letting her gaze roam over the crowd, and Ebine’s expression lit up. She grabbed Edel’s hand and pushed her way through the throng to reach Ahiru and Fakir. “Ahiru! Hello! Edel tells me it’s your birthday?”

“Y-yes, it is.” Ahiru nodded. “I’m turning nineteen, or rather, I did turn nineteen… what’s the right, um, way to put it?”

“I have no idea, and I’m not sure it matters.” Ebine waved a hand dismissively. “The most important thing is that – well, happy birthday!” She leaned forward and gave her a small hug. “I hope you’re having a good day!”

“I am, thank you!” Ahiru smiled. “I got presents earlier, and I’m here having fun so far…”

“Yes, what a marvelous coincidence that this and your birthday, well, coincided!” Ebine gave a hearty laugh. “The castle baker’s not too shabby, eh? And I admit it’s nice to have someone bake for me for a change.”

“Oh, yes!” Ahiru nodded again. “The dessert was really good, though not as good as yours, but I understand wanting a break… but, um, it’s the castle staff providing all this?”

“Mmm-hmm.” Ebine glanced around. “The prince and princess ought to be here somewhere, they’ll be lighting the bonfire I suppose… though it’s entirely possible the princess opted to stay home in her condition.” She shrugged. “Anyway, I’m glad you’re having a good time of it, especially because it’s your first time at one of these as well as being your birthday. You continue to enjoy yourself, all right?” She patted Ahiru’s arm.

“I will!” Ahiru said brightly. “And – and you too!”

They separated again after that, Ebine and Edel disappearing into the crowd together while Ahiru and Fakir continued to walk beside each other. Once, a person trying to push their way through to the front jostled Ahiru and nearly came between them, but Fakir grabbed her hand just in time and gave the offending person a glare so fierce they seemed to wither on the spot before hurrying away in a different direction. Fakir then let go of her hand and made sure she was all right, that the “idiot”, as he put it, hadn’t hurt her. Ahiru assured him it wasn’t the case, and they kept moving.

It was only a short walk to where the bonfire awaited lighting, but the sheer amount of people moving towards it slowed everyone down and made it take longer than it would’ve to get there had they been walking by themselves. At one point Ahiru thought she spotted Autor trying to make his way to the front of the crowd, but he vanished from view and she couldn’t be sure. Other castle staff and even some of the knights were on hand to usher the crowd into a circle of sorts around the soon-to-be-lit fire, with a good distance between them and it. Unsurprisingly, Ahiru found her view of it all blocked by taller people.

“Good evening, everyone!” Prince Siegfried’s voice rang out, from somewhere Ahiru couldn’t see; she presumed he was standing by the bonfire, however, as Ebine had mentioned. “And a joyous summer solstice to you all! It is my great honor to once again stand with you in the celebration of this occasion, and light the bonfire. Sadly, Princess Rue cannot be here this evening – she had fully intended to, but our physician advised against the exertion.” A sound of disappointment rippled through the crowd. Ahiru found herself thinking first that if that had indeed been Autor pushing his way to the front, he must be very let down by Rue’s absence. Her second thought was pleasure that the people were so attached to their princess that this could provoke such a reaction, a good difference from the vitriol Edel and Nan Geiszler had discussed at market that one day. Her third thought was a guilty sort of relief that Rue was at home – she hadn’t seen her since that odd tea, and wasn’t sure she was ready yet to meet her again. She still liked her quite a bit, but she wasn’t very comfortable with her after that incident. It was a strange and complicated thing all around, to be sure.

She found herself tuning out what Siegfried was saying about the significance of the solstice and what the season still had in store for them as she dwelled on her feelings towards Rue. Most of it was vaguely political and related to his pride in his country, anyway. And either way she soon found herself interrupted when someone laid a hand on her arm and spoke tentatively. “Ahiru?”

“Huh?” Ahiru turned to see Freya standing there, and her face lit up. “Oh! Freya! Hi! Happy summer solstice!”

“The same to you. And also a happy birthday, if I’ve heard right?” Freya smiled.

“O-oh, yes!” Ahiru nodded. “Th-thank you!”

“I –” Freya began, but she fell silent as a roar went up from the crowd, drowning her out. Evidently Prince Siegfried had lit the bonfire as he finished making his long speech; Freya waited until the cheering had died down to continue speaking. “I brought you a little gift, if that’s all right.” She held up a small bag, and a crown of brightly colored summer flowers with ribbons attached to it.

“Oh! Oh no, that’s wonderful, but… you really didn’t have to…” Ahiru’s eyes went wide. “Th-thank you… even though I don’t really deserve it…”

“Don’t be silly, of course you do.” Freya leaned forward and placed the flower crown atop Ahiru’s head. “There. You look lovely.” She smiled at her handiwork. “And these…” She indicated the bag. “Are seeds from some of my hybrid flowers, they’re all individually packaged and labeled inside, so you can grow them in your own garden if you like.” She held it out to Ahiru.

“Oh, thank you!” Ahiru took the bag and clasped it to herself. “I – I probably won’t grow them as pretty as you do, but thank you! Thank you so much!”

“I think you can. All they need is love and care, two things it’s obvious you have a surplus of.” Freya smiled again. “Enjoy them, and have a good evening, Ahiru.”

“Y-you too! Thank you again!” Ahiru waved at Freya before she turned her back and walked away. All around them the crowd was beginning to break up to make room for the dancing that was starting around the roaring flames of the bonfire. “Um, I… I guess we should move?” She slipped the bag of seeds into the little pocket concealed in the skirt of her dress.

“Yeah, seems like a good idea.” Fakir nodded. “Here, let’s… this way seems good.” He took her hand again, just for a moment, to lead her in the direction he’d spoken of. Once they were both moving that way at the same pace he let go, and they eventually found themselves at the edge of the crowd. “This okay?”

“Yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “Um… do they do group dances at this usually?”

“Not really.” Fakir shrugged. “The people who are closest to the bonfire sometimes join hands and dance in a circle around it, but generally people tend to stick to dancing with one partner. It’s not as wild an affair as Halloween is. So you don’t have to worry about being pulled in again.”

“That’s good.” Ahiru watched people moving the crowd, finding and changing partners. The music playing now was a bit frenetic, but not as frenzied as she recalled it being during that horrible group dance at Halloween. “Are – are there any rules about who gets to dance?”

“You mean like at the Harvest Festival?” Fakir asked.

“Yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “Is there some kind of competition people are trying to win?”

“No.” Fakir’s gaze traveled out over the field. “It’s meant only to be a celebration of the solstice, of the season, so people dance freely as part of that. There are no rules, no prizes to be awarded.”

“Oh. Okay. Then… maybe… do you think… no, no, never mind.” Ahiru frowned down at the ground.

“Never mind what?” Fakir took a step towards her. “Is something wrong?”

“No, nothing’s wrong, really, just… I… you’ll think it’s silly.” She sighed.

“I promise I won’t,” Fakir said gently. “Go ahead and say it, unless you really don’t want to.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to, just… I, um… well…” Ahiru swallowed. “I just was wondering if – if maybe… maybe… we could dance a little?” She blushed and looked away. “See? That’s really silly, I know you don’t want to, forget I asked… sorry…”

“No, don’t be… I…” Fakir paused. “I’ll… dance with you. If you still want to.”

“Really?” Ahiru stared up at him with wide eyes. “You – you would? But I thought you didn’t really like to…”

Fakir frowned. “When did I say that?”

“At Halloween.” Ahiru tilted her head. “At least, I think that’s what you said…”

“I remember saying I didn’t mind it. And that I don’t seek it out. But not that I disliked it.” Fakir shook his head. “Besides, it’s your birthday… if you want to do something fun, you should be able to, instead of being stuck on the sidelines.” He held his hand out to her. “Come on – if you still want to dance, let’s dance.”

“Okay!” Her face lighting up with the joy she felt bubbling to life inside her, Ahiru took Fakir’s hand. He led a little bit away from where they’d been standing, just inside the rough circle that had formed around the bonfire. The musicians slowed their playing to a less fast-paced song just as they got there; Fakir, after a moment’s pause, took her other hand and laid it on his shoulder before lightly resting his hand on her waist and pulling her a little closer. Their other hands stayed clasped together, and slowly, hesitantly, they began to dance. After about a minute, Ahiru spoke again. “Th-thank you… for doing this…”

“You’re welcome. I…” He cleared his throat. “I told you, I want you to be able to do something fun on your birthday.”

“I – I know… and that means a lot to me.” Ahiru swallowed past a lump in her throat. She thought she could feel Fakir’s pulse against her wrist where their hands were clasped, and it seemed to be racing. But maybe that was just her own, a reaction to being so close to him. “I really didn’t want to miss out this time too, and I thought you’d think it was silly so I almost didn’t ask…”

“It’s not silly at all. You…” He trailed off, his voice sounding oddly strained. When he spoke again, he sounded a bit less so. “You deserve to enjoy yourself on your birthday.”

“Th-thanks, I… oh no!” Horror lanced through her. “I – I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to step on your foot!”

“It’s all right. Calm down, idiot.” His voice was soft and gentle now. “It didn’t hurt, and I don’t mind. You did tell me you weren’t that good at it, so it’s not like I didn’t have warning.” He let out a small laugh.

“Then – then why did you agree?” Ahiru frowned. “You had to know I’d do something like that…”

“Because I – ” He stopped. “I told you – it’s your birthday, and I wanted you to be able to enjoy yourself. And I really don’t mind. So don’t worry about it.”

“O-okay… I’ll try not to… but I really am sorry…” Ahiru swallowed, and after a moment’s hesitation she leaned her head against him. She almost thought she heard a sharp intake of breath from him, but in all the noise around them she couldn’t be sure.

They danced in silence for a few minutes more, until the musicians sped up their song again. At that point Fakir stopped moving, and pulled back enough to look down at Ahiru. “So… do you… want to keep going?”

“N-no, no thank you, I think…” She could feel herself blushing. “I think I’d be _really_ bad at a faster dance, and I’d step on your feet a lot more and actually hurt you this time… so maybe we should go sit down or something.”

“All right.” Fakir nodded. “They’ve spread some blankets on the grass, I see… we’ll go over there to sit, so you don’t ruin your dress.” Keeping hold of her hand, he led her out of the dancing and towards where several large blankets and sheets had indeed been laid out, as though for some kind of enormous picnic. He found them a spot with a good view of the dancing and away from everyone else who had chosen to seat themselves there as well, and they sat down.

Neither one spoke for a while, choosing instead to sit quietly and watch the dancing. Ahiru stole several glances at Fakir, but couldn’t read his expression, and his hand rested so close to hers that she felt tempted to reach over, just a little bit, and hold it. Each time the temptation arose she came a little closer to giving in, but held herself back over and over because she didn’t think he’d be receptive to it. There was no real _need_ to hold hands now, after all – they weren’t trying to stay close to each other in a pushy crowd. The only reason to do so at the moment would be for the pleasure of feeling his fingers entwined with hers, and she very much doubted he would welcome that.

Finally, Ahiru broke the silence between them. “Fakir?”

“Yeah?” He turned to look at her. “What is it?”

“I – I was just wondering… and don’t laugh if this is a stupid question, I mean it probably is, but…” She twisted one of the ribbons that dangled from her flower crown. “Why do they call this midsummer? It’s really more like the beginning of summer, isn’t it? I never understood that.”

“I… don’t understand it either,” he admitted. “I have no idea. Sorry.”

“Really?” Ahiru let go of the ribbon. “I – I thought you knew everything…”

“No. I don’t.” His mouth quirked into a strange sort of smile, one she’d be hard-pressed to describe if asked – there was some humor to it, but it almost seemed a little sad too if she looked at it the right way. “No one knows everything, least of all me.”

“No, don’t say it like that.” Ahiru shook her head. “You know lots of things, and you’re really smart. Not like me.”

“That’s not true either.” Fakir brushed some hair out of his eyes. “You’re very smart, more than you think – you should give yourself more credit.”

A sharp pang pricked at her heart – hadn’t he said something like that the night they’d almost kissed in the library? No, it had only _seemed_ like they’d almost kissed, she corrected herself. “I don’t know… I’m still learning a lot… I feel like there’s so much I don’t know… and you know more than I do…”

“Only about certain things.” He shifted. “I never studied the things you’re learning from Edel, for example. And you’ve taught me things you can’t find in books.”

“Huh?” Ahiru tilted her head. “Like what? I can’t think of anything…”

“You can’t? Really?” He laughed, though it didn’t sound like he was laughing at her. “Don’t you remember what I was like when we met? Compare it to now – you’ve made me a better person without even trying.”

“Oh… no… I…” Ahiru blushed and ducked her head. “We – we just know each other better now, I’ve gotten to know the real you…”

“Maybe. But I also feel like that ‘real me’… is different. Better.” Fakir stared up at the sky. The sun hadn’t set yet, and wouldn’t for a few hours. “You were never required to do anything like that for me, of course, it’s not your job… but all the same I feel you’ve changed me. Simply by knowing you and being exposed to your kindness.”

“I… oh…” Ahiru hid her face in her hands, feeling it burn with a fresh blush. “I – I wasn’t… I mean…”

“I’m sorry. I don’t want to embarrass you.” Fakir frowned. “I just wanted to thank you, and… I don’t know… even though it wasn’t something you were striving for, I guess I thought – I hoped – you’d feel a little better about yourself, to know that you’ve brought about positive change in at least one person’s life.” He shifted. “Sorry.”

“No, no, it’s okay!” Ahiru let her hands fall into her lap. “I – I understand, and… thank you… it does make me happy, not because I wanted to change you or anything, but because… well… I’m just glad to know you and that you’re glad you know _me_ , if that makes sense.”

“It does.” Fakir nodded. Neither of them spoke for a minute or two, and then he cleared his throat. “So, uh… are you thirsty? I could get us something to drink, if you want.”

“Y-yeah, that sounds good!” Ahiru smoothed out her skirt. “I’d really like to have a drink! Thank you!”

“All right.” Fakir stood. “Any preferences?”

“Well, um…” Ahiru fidgeted. “I – I like sweet stuff, you know that… and I’d kind of like something with a little alcohol in it?” She blushed. “Just – just to celebrate, you know? Is that okay?”

“It’s your choice,” Fakir reminded her. “I don’t control what you drink, and you know what you can handle.”

“True.” Ahiru brightened. “Well, then, please get me something with alcohol in it! But just a little.”

“Sure.” Fakir smiled at her. “I’ll be right back, then.”

He returned after a few minutes, carrying glasses full of a pale purple liquid, and garnished with a single candied violet each, floating atop the drink. Ahiru accepted hers from him and peered down at it. “Ooh, what’s in this?”

“It’s made from korn and violet syrup.” He sat down beside her. “They assured me it was very sweet and not too strong.”

“Ooh, okay!” Ahiru plucked the candied violet out of the glass and nibbled on a petal. “Yum…”

“Heh. I’m glad you like that part, at least.” Fakir raised his glass. “I… guess we should toast, then? To you, and your birthday, and… many more happy years to come.”

“Awww, thank you!” Ahiru clinked her glass against his, and they both took sips. “Ooh, I like this!” She beamed. “It’s really good, you made a good choice!”

“I’m glad.” Fakir smiled. “I didn’t want to bring back something disappointing for you.”

“You didn’t! Not at all.” Ahiru bit off another petal and ate it. “What about you? Do you like it? Or is it too sweet for you?”

“I like it. Don’t worry.” Fakir took another sip. “I like things that are sweet.”

“Oh yeah.” Ahiru giggled, then drank some more. “You always put a lot of honey in your tea and a lot of jam on your toast… I was kind of surprised when I first noticed that, I used to think you’d turn your nose up at sweet stuff and want everything… I don’t know…” She waved her hand around, scattering sugar from the candied violet. “Sour? Bitter? I don’t know…”

“I guess either fit, depending on the food or drink.” Fakir leaned back and gazed up at the sky. “But no… I prefer sweeter foods. I can see where you got the idea, though.”

“I…” Ahiru squirmed. “I wasn’t trying to say anything bad about you… sorry…”

“No need to be sorry, I know what you meant.” Fakir shook his head. “Raetsel used to say it was a pity that with all the sweets I inhaled it was a shame it didn’t affect my personality. She wasn’t wrong.”

“But… that’s mean to say…” Ahiru frowned. “I don’t like that.”

“It’s just her way of teasing.” He shrugged. “And she had a point – I’ve never been the most open or gracious person.”

“You’re nice to _me_ , though.” Ahiru made a pouty expression. “You’re still kind of grumpy sometimes, I know, but that’s just part of who you are, it’s not _all_ of it… and underneath, where it counts, you really do have a good and kind heart, and that’s not cause of me, I could tell even before we started being friends, it’s _why_ we started being friends. Nobody’s really simple, I don’t think, and… and you’re no different.” She looked down at her lap, and took a somewhat big gulp of her drink, draining her glass in one fell swoop that almost made her cough. “You’re… one of the best people _I’ve_ ever met. And I think being friends has been good for me too, not just for you. It goes both ways. Which is as it should be.”

“… Yeah. You’re right.” Fakir tipped his head back and polished off his drink.

“I know.” She gave him what was supposed to be a smug look, and tried to wink, and he laughed.

“Anyway… if we’re both done, I’ll take these back.” He took Ahiru’s empty glass from her when she nodded and held it out to him, and then stood up. “Do you want anything else?”

“Just – just some water.” Ahiru folded her hands in her lap. “I feel like I could use some.”

“Oh?” His eyebrows went up. “Do you feel sick? Are you all right?”

“No, I’m fine, just…” Ahiru hiccupped. “I – I drank the last of it kind of fast, and I think it went to my head… if I drink some water and just sit for a while, though, I should be fine…”

“Idiot.” He sounded amused and affectionate, though, rather than angry. “All right. I’ll get you some water and be right back.”

“Okay, thanks…” Ahiru watched him walk away, until he disappeared into the crowd, and then turned her head slowly so she could watch more of the dancing.

Maybe it was the effect of the alcohol, maybe it was everything they’d spoken about or the way he’d held her while they danced, maybe all of it – she didn’t know. But the urge to tell him that she loved him was rising up in her as she waited, almost irresistibly so. It certainly felt like the right kind of night, if nothing else… and they had some privacy where they were sitting… so maybe it could work out well? When he came back it wouldn’t be hard to steer the conversation towards a confession, not after everything they’d already said to each other tonight. And then maybe they’d –

 _No. Don’t_ , a stern voice told her. _That’s just the liquor talking – be sensible! He does care about you, but not like that. Never like that. Don’t be a fool._ Ahiru sighed. It was true: she was only feeling brave because of the drink she’d had. The memory of that night in the library surfaced again, and all that courage promptly evaporated. She’d already confused his intentions and feelings once, it wouldn’t be smart to do it again, and this time with much more disastrous results. All this comfort and ease between them was owed to the fact that she’d kept her mouth shut for so long. If she just held out and kept quiet until she got over him, that wouldn’t change. But if she gave into her poorly-thought-out impulses, everything would become awkward and awful. No, she needed to remain silent on this matter, forevermore.

Time seemed to drag on as she waited for Fakir to return, and she’d just started to worry about his prolonged absence when he reappeared, carrying a single glass of water as promised. “Sorry,” he said as he handed it to her. “Raetsel and Hans showed up and wanted to talk to me. I tried to get away as soon as I could, though.” He sat down.

“It’s okay.” Ahiru shook her head and took a gulp of water. “I understand. She’s kind of like your family, right? It’s okay to talk to her.”

“Yeah, but you’re…” He paused. “You asked me to get you this because you didn’t feel well. I shouldn’t have kept you waiting for so long, family or not.”

“It’s _okay_.” Ahiru took another sip. “Really.”

“And you?” Fakir eyed her anxiously. “How do you feel? Is the water helping?”

“A little, yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “And it started to go away while I was sitting here waiting, too, so please, don’t worry about it.”

“All right.” He sighed. “I’ll try not to.”

Ahiru giggled. “Silly worrywart.”

“Hmph.” He pretended to scowl at her. “Look who’s talking.”

“Yeah, true… we _are_ both silly…” She laughed again. “I guess it’s a tie.”

Fakir’s mouth quirked into another wry smile. “Yeah. I’ll agree to that.”

The solstice celebration lasted well into the night, past the eventual sunset and moonrise, until the stars had been out for some time and the bonfire waned. Torches were lit from its remains to see by as people began to disperse and the castle staff started to pack up everything that had been brought there for the festival. Ahiru saw someone throw earth over the last smoldering ashes of the blaze as she and Fakir searched the crowd for those they had come there with. After some time and effort they located Charon and Edel – Raetsel was going home with her parents – and returned to the wagon and Asim, who was asleep on his feet by then. Ahiru rode up front, as she had on the trip there, and had to pinch herself a few times to keep from nodding off with her head on Fakir’s shoulder.

She moved through the dark house in a bit of haze when they finally got there, dragging her feet due to her exhaustion but also impatient, in a sleepy sort of way, to get into bed. The seeds were deposited on her table along with the flower crown, and she just barely managed to get herself into a nightgown before crawling under the covers. Sleep overtook her at last once there, and she sighed in relief without knowing she did.

And as she slept, Ahiru dreamed – of a fine summer’s day not so unlike the one she’d just passed. The sun shone through the branches of the trees as she wandered through the woods, instinctively knowing her destination, as tended to happen in dreams. She walked for what seemed both like no time at all and an age of the world – for time and geography did not have the same meaning as they did in the waking world – until she reached the well in the rose-covered clearing. His horse was tied at there, but she and Fakir had eyes only for each other as she emerged into the space which felt so strongly of being his.

They spoke no words, for they did not need them; he merely took her hand, and she let him lead her away.  It took only a few steps for them to be transported to the flower-strewn meadow they once had ridden through together. When they reached it he bent and kissed her, and she fell willingly into his arms. Before she knew it she was lying upon the ground without her clothes on, and he had shed his, and their bodies moved together in an intimate dance of skin against skin. She clung to him, and he whispered her name, and –

And Ahiru woke up.

She blinked at the inky blackness of her room, waiting for her eyes to adjust and her heart to stop racing, even as a persistent and all too familiar ache between her legs intruded on her awareness. That – what sort of dream had _that_ been? Her face felt so hot she was sure it must have been glowing in the dark. Had she _ever_ dreamed about him like that before? Oh, she’d certainly dreamed about _kissing_ Fakir, and fantasized about it, but nothing like _this,_ not till now. She trembled at the memory of the things they’d been doing in the dream, the way he’d touched her. The way he’d _looked_ at her. So many details were fading away now, but the impressions left remained clear. It had seemed so real, so _vivid,_ to the point where she could almost still feel it all - his body against hers, his fingers in her hair, his lips on her skin, the taste of his kisses. There was no way she could just go back to sleep after _that,_ especially not when the dream had ended before they’d finished. So she let her hands wander, and when she'd thoroughly satisfied herself she rolled over with a deep, contented sigh and drifted off again, into dreams she wouldn't remember in the morning.


	24. Chapter 24

Ahiru stared listlessly out her window as the sun rose. She’d been up for a while already, and had seen the sky turn from black to grey and now to shades of pink and orange. The soft morning breeze carried the scents of flowers and strawberries to her nose, and she could even see the milky orb that was the waxing moon. Birds sang, and leaves rustled, and between one thing and another she slowly began to feel ever so slightly better.

She wasn’t inclined to nightmares, not usually. Her dreams – at least, the ones she recalled – mostly tended to be so surreal and strange that she couldn’t make a whit of sense of them. Lately her subconscious mind had also started teasing her with dreams of a rather salacious nature, all starring herself and Fakir. Just thinking about them made her blush crimson. But the one that had jolted her out of her sleep this morning had been altogether unpleasant, so much so that she was still feeling deeply unsettled in more than one way.

As to whether it could really be called a nightmare, she wasn’t sure – it hadn’t had any monsters or terrifying creatures in it that she could see, nothing much at all had happened, and it certainly hadn’t dredged up or distorted any horrible old memories. Then again, it _had_ been scary and distressing in its own way, and even now she was still feeling awful. So maybe she needed to expand her personal definition of nightmare.

In the dream, she’d been in the forest. She’d started out walking, on a pleasant and sunny day, but soon had started running as it got darker and darker. The curious thing was, she hadn’t been running _out_ of the forest, trying to get home – she’d been running deeper _into_ the woods. Why? She couldn’t quite remember now if she’d actually seen the reason why, but she felt with a deep certainty that she’d been pursuing someone or something, desperately trying to keep up. Perhaps it had been something she’d simply just known, the way it seemed to happen so often in dreams. You just _knew_ something without having been told, and you didn’t question it. Ahiru rested her chin on her hands and gave it some thought; when she’d finished, that was the conclusion she’d come to. Yes. She’d instinctively known in the dream that she was chasing a person or thing, with a powerful desperation guiding her feet and driving her deeper and deeper into a dark forest at night, which was one of the scariest places she could think of, even now in the waking world with sun upon her face.

And as she chased it – or them – something else had chased her, or so it had seemed. As she’d run, she’d seen long, thin arms reaching out on either side of her, taking the appearance of shadows on the trees, even in the dark – for the moonlight lit her way after the sun vanished from the sky. Had someone laughed at her? She thought she remembered there being eerie laughter. Someone or something had been pursuing her, or maybe just wanted to keep her from reaching whoever or whatever _she_ was chasing.

It wasn’t only the fear and disquiet caused by those things that Ahiru still felt hanging heavily over her even now, though. Awful as those feelings were, they paled in comparison to the terror and sadness that her desperate headlong race through the forest had produced in her. What had she been running after? _Who_ had she been running after? And why had she needed so badly to reach them or it? She remembered crying in the dream, and had even woken up to tears on her cheeks. She knew, somehow, that in the dream she’d been less scared for herself than for someone or something else, and that she’d woken up before she’d succeeded in reaching them, leaving a feeling of sickness and failure deep in the pit of her stomach, as well as a pall over her whole emotional being.

She brooded over it for the better part of an hour, until a noise from the next room startled her out of her dismal thoughts; out of instinct or habit Ahiru turned to look, and then frowned at her own silliness. _Obviously_ she wouldn’t be able to see what was going on, why had she bothered to turn towards the wall? She pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs as she listened to Fakir move around his room, obviously readying himself for the day. He had a habit lately of rising even earlier than Edel so that he could start work with Charon as soon as possible and end the workday sooner than they did in the cooler months.  She heard him get dressed and wash his face, and what else he did she couldn’t tell. Probably he brushed out and retied his hair too, judging by how messy it had gotten every morning when he’d been laid up in bed injured. Not that it looked one hundred percent neat the rest of the time, without a single hair out of place, but he seemed to like to be at least _somewhat_ presentable, and she’d never known him to be particularly sloppy when it came to his hygiene or clothing. His clothes could be a bit old and worn, true, and he didn’t care about fashion, but he kept himself clean and reasonably neat, and his room seemed to be the same way, from what glimpses she’d gotten of it.

If only she’d dreamed of him instead. Ahiru’s head drooped, even as she heard Fakir exit his room and head past hers in the direction of the kitchen. That would have been so much nicer, no doubt. It made it awkward to look him in the eye afterwards, yes, but even that was much better than feeling like this. It was a bit early still, but she had no desire to get up just yet anyway, and she doubted her stomach could handle any food. So she stayed put for the time being.

It had been a little over a month since her birthday. The weather had warmed up quite a bit since then, mostly in the past couple weeks; right now they were in the middle of a bit of a heat wave. Today looked to be no exception – the sun had risen by now into a cloudless blue sky, and Ahiru could already feel some of its warmth through her screen. Quite a difference from the weekend that had just passed, which had been spent huddling inside, hiding away from a raging summer storm. The rain had started pouring down late in the afternoon on Friday, after a dark and overcast day just damp enough to give Mr. Katz pain, but not enough pain to make him want to cancel instead of powering through (a fact that had filled her with guilt when she’d seen him), and had kept falling unceasingly until just after dinner last night. The clouds had cleared away so thoroughly while she slept that it was like they’d never been there at all, with only the lingering dampness on the ground to serve as evidence that the deluge really had happened. But even that would soon dry up.

It wasn’t until a while after Ahiru heard footsteps return and go the other way past her room that she finally dragged herself off the bed and set about preparing herself to face the day. She still felt a little lethargic and depressed, but she knew the morning was getting on and that if she didn’t make haste to the breakfast table Edel would worry about her, and she didn’t want that. At least Fakir wouldn’t be around – she could fib reasonably well to Edel that she was just tired and hadn’t slept much and get away without too many questions or suspicions (at least, not to the point where they’d stress her out like they did with Fakir), but with him it was a different story. He worried so over her, even if he didn’t pry once he could see she didn’t want to discuss something, and she usually did tell him what was bothering her anyway. It was just so _easy_ to confide in him – he never judged her, he always supported her and validated her feelings, and even if he couldn’t solve the problem it nevertheless made her feel a little better for talking to him. Not that she couldn’t talk to Edel and get that same sort of response, but with him it was – different somehow. She couldn’t explain why or how it was different, she just knew that it was. Talking to Fakir was wonderful and comforting in a way no one else could provide. She just wasn’t sure right now if she wanted to burden him with this, if it was right to.

Ahiru washed her face and changed into a fresh chemise and a light, thin dress that would hopefully help her stay cool during the heat of the day. She left her shutter open for the breeze, but closed her curtains to block out as much light as she could. Her hair she brushed and pinned up into a simple bun, and when she’d finished all that walked briskly to the kitchen, hoping she hadn’t dragged her feet too much.

Edel was at the kitchen table when she got there, sipping tea and nibbling on a sandwich while she read the newspaper. She glanced up at the sound of Ahiru’s entrance and smiled. “Good morning, Ahiru.” She yawned. “How did you sleep last night?”

“Um, all right, I guess…” Ahiru shrugged. “I – I kind of kept tossing and turning, though, and I think I had weird dreams…”

“I sympathize. My sleep could have been better too.” Edel yawned again. “I think it’s the hot, damp air – I never _was_ able to get restful sleep on such evenings. I’ll be grateful when summer is over and we’re back to the cool air of autumn, I can tell you that.”

“Yeah, me too.” Ahiru poured herself some tea and took her usual seat at the table. “I was enjoying summer at first, cause I enjoy all the seasons, but it’s just been too hot lately, and I think it does affect our sleep.”

“Yes, that is my experience with it exactly.” Edel chuckled. “At first, it isn’t so bad – the weather is warmer, and drier, and lets you do more things outside than you could before, and there is such a bounty of delicious produce, that you are excited and enjoy the season. But by the time we reach this point in it, one can’t help but be well over it. For the pleasant warmth has turned to heat, the insects are bothersome, your sleep is disturbed, and you are sick to your heart of all the canning and pickling.”

“Y-yeah!” Ahiru nodded, and began to butter some bread. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’ve enjoyed learning how to do that stuff, and I know it’s really important, but… we’ve just done so much of it and it makes everything hotter, and just… yeah.”

“Oh, believe me, I understand.” Edel took a large gulp of her tea. “It is the same for me every year. I am excited about it all when the season begins, and more than motivated, but by the end I am heartily sick of it. Yet by the time the next summer rolls around, I have forgotten that feeling and am excited again. How curious a thing, the human brain.”

Ahiru added some jam to her bread. “And we’ll be doing more soon, right?”

“Yes.” Edel sighed. “With the last of the summer harvest, and with much of the autumn produce.  Though at least in autumn the heat of the cauldron will be welcome, for the chill will have set in by then.”

Ahiru sighed too. “That sounds really nice right now. Can’t we just skip to it already?”

“I wish.” Edel laughed. “But no, we must take time as it happens, and the seasons as they pass; it is the natural way of things, the cycle of the world. Only in the fairy realm does time still and cease to move.”

“Oh yeah…” Ahiru took a bite of jam-slathered bread and chewed and swallowed it. “I think I remember reading that… it’s always summer there, right?”

“It depends on which account you read.” Edel shrugged. “Some accounts say that it is suspended in eternal spring, others claim it is midsummer. But either way, the frost of winter will never touch the world of the Fair Folk, and the passage of time is not what it is here. A thing may still grow from infancy to adulthood in that realm, but emerge to find that a hundred years or more have passed in the human world.” She polished off the last of her sandwich before continuing. “I’m sure you’ve read tales to that effect before too.”

“Yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “Sometimes it gets glossed over or it just doesn’t come into the story, but… yeah. Time is weird in the fairy world.” She took a drink of her own tea. “But, um, speaking of time… sort of… what are we doing today?”

“Ah, that is the question.” Edel folded up her newspaper and set it aside. “It is to be a busy day for me, and I do not know if I shall be able to manage my own time in a way that is agreeable to me. You see, Ahiru, there is a potion that greatly needs brewing, for it must be allowed to age a few days before being delivered… but I _also_ have several deliveries I cannot put off, that _have_ to be accomplished today. You see the problem?”

“Y-yeah, I do.” She reached for another piece of bread, and added some cheese and greens and ham to it. “What are you going to do about it?”

“Well, if worse comes to worse I may have to leave you alone with the potion while it finishes brewing, for it is a time-consuming thing.” Edel sighed. “And I have little desire to be out in the middle of the day, but I may have no choice about that either. In which case, do not expect me for lunch, for I will eat at a café in town between deliveries.” She frowned. “I do hate to do that to you, however – it is a simple enough potion I trust you to have no difficulties with, but all the same it hardly seems fair to you to just leave you like that.”

“Oh no, no, don’t worry about that!” Ahiru shook her head. “I’m okay with doing part of it on my own, really – I know a lot more about what I’m doing than I used to because you’ve taught me really well, and you said it’s easy, and besides, I understand. I don’t want anyone going without their medicines that they really need just because of _me_ , you know?”

“I _do_ know, yes.” Edel’s mouth curved into a wry smile. “I had a feeling you would say something like that. All right… very well. If it looks as if I will have to, I will leave you with the potion, but all the same I apologize for having to do so.”

“It’s okay. Really.” Ahiru swallowed another bite of her sandwich. “If anything, I feel bad for _you_ , cause you’ll be outside in the hottest part of the day…”

“Being stuck inside with a simmering cauldron might not be any better.” Edel laughed. “But I do see what you are getting at.” She drained the last of her tea. “Then, since it has been decided, we will get started as soon as you have finished eating and we’ve cleaned up. Do not feel obligated to rush on my account, however,” she added. “Eat at a normal pace, carefully, for a little lost time is far preferable to you choking on your meal.”

Ahiru flushed. “I – I know. I won’t.”

In truth, though, she still wasn’t that hungry, thanks to her dream, and ended up finishing soon anyway. Edel expressed concern about her having gotten enough to eat, but she was easily assuaged with a white lie about the heat of summer taking a toll on her appetite (which it did sometimes, particularly at midday, so it wasn’t that big a falsehood). It even prompted more commiseration, and a confession that she’d been having trouble lately thinking of something she actually wanted to cook and eat for lunch, and a promise that between the two of them they would come up with some easy, light meals to get them through the rest of the season.

After that they proceeded to the workroom. Edel lit the fire under the cauldron to get it heated up, while Ahiru sat at the worktable to begin chopping the herbs and grinding the spices necessary for the potion. “This is a healing brew,” Edel told her as she measured purified rainwater, oil, and a few other liquids into the cauldron. “It is specially crafted to provide relief from the insect bites that are so common at this time of year. The weather has been such lately that our stores are running low, and I would like to replenish them. Unfortunately, as I told you over breakfast, it must be allowed to sit for a couple of days to reach full effectiveness. It must have one night of exposure to moonlight and one day of exposure to sunlight in order to have its true potency. And the weather forecasters tell me that another summer storm is expected to hit us in a few days, so we need to work within the time allowed us by this reprieve to ensure that our supplies do not get too low.”

“That makes sense.” Ahiru wiped at her forehead; it was already becoming very warm in the workroom. “I don’t want to run out and have anyone suffer.”

“Indeed.” Edel finished measuring things into the cauldron, and then set about closing the containers and returning them to their shelves after glancing at the clock on the work table that faced in her direction. “The liquid components must be allowed to simmer for half an hour, so take your time on that, for there is no rush. After that we will begin adding what you have prepared in the precise order they must be incorporated.”

Ahiru frowned. “I thought you said this potion wasn’t difficult…”

“It isn’t, not really. Just a bit time-consuming.” Edel took her measuring tools over to the basin for washing. “I know, I did just say that the dry ingredients must be added in a precise order. However, the order, in a happy accident of fate, is alphabetical, so you will have little trouble remembering what to add when you must do this by yourself. After that it only requires boiling and stirring, and then a long period of simmering. It must then be allowed to cool, and when it has done that you need only store it in the necessary jars for moonlight absorption.”

“Um, okay…” Ahiru looked over at the cauldron. “How long do each of those steps take?”

“I have written it down, no worries.” Edel turned back around and pointed to something on the table that Ahiru couldn’t see. “On the other side of that clock – I am not sure you can spot it from where you are – I have left the full recipe with all the required times and steps described in detail. That way you may easily see the time and keep track of it.” She paused. “Additionally, while I am sure it will be boring to wait, I suggest you do not bring anything _too_ interesting in here with you to fill the time, so that you are not overly distracted.”

Ahiru frowned again. “How come?”

“Because you must keep something of a close eye on the cauldron, to make sure that the potion within does not boil again. That would harm its effectiveness.” Edel finished rinsing off her tools and began washing her hands. “I am sorry to leave such a tedious task in your hands, but it really does need to be done today.”

“Oh no, it’s okay. I told you, I understand.” Ahiru finished with one herb and moved on to the last one that needed chopping. “It doesn’t sound that hard, and I’m sure I have some book that I can look at but not get too distracted by…”

“All right.” Edel sank into a chair opposite Ahiru, not far from the cauldron. “When you have finished that, wash your hands and the tools you have used, and then if there is time go ahead and fetch yourself some entertainment. If not, then it can be done while I bring the mixture to boiling.”

Ahiru looked down at what she still had left to do; there wasn’t that much. “Okay. I think I should be able to get this done in time, though.”

A subtle aroma soon began to fill the air as the liquid ingredients continued to simmer. Ahiru wasn’t sure if she liked it or not; it wasn’t that it was terrible, just… a bit odd, and hard to define. She soon grew used to it, however, and found her sense of smell suitably distracted by the scents she was releasing by crushing, grinding, and chopping the herbs and spices. When she’d got that done she obeyed Edel’s instructions to wash her hands and the implements she’d used, and got confirmation that there was enough time for her to make a quick run to her room for something to occupy herself with during the later stages of making the potion. After some indecision she chose a rather thick tome full of artwork of plants and flowers, that didn’t have much in the way of text to read. That way she could admire the pretty pictures and also be able to easily look away and keep an eye on the cauldron, should she be left alone with it. And she had a strong feeling she would be.

Shortly after she returned with the book, Edel told her that it was time to add the dry ingredients to the mix. True to her word, doing it in alphabetical order did indeed make it easier. They discussed things like magical theory and the fundamentals of potion brewing while waiting for their concoction to boil, and then took turns stirring as it did. Edel then brought it back down to a gentle simmer, and from that point on it was time to wait for three hours while it did that.

“I won’t be able to be here that long, however, I’m afraid,” Edel commented with a frown as she glanced at the clock. “I have several deliveries to make, all around town – there’s been a spike in summer colds, not to mention people are in need of balm to protect against the sun, to relieve bug bites, brews for hydration and the easing of various heat illnesses… not to mention ointments for injuries and those who foolishly venture into toxic plants.” She winced and sighed. “I do not know how much longer I should stay here.”

“Go ahead and go, I don’t mind.” Ahiru tucked a few stray hairs back into her bun. “I’ll be fine here – I just have to wait for it and make sure it doesn’t boil again, right? I can do that. You should go while it’s not too hot so you can get back before too long.”

“Well, even if I leave now, I likely won’t be back for lunch.” Edel looked at the clock again. “But the sooner the better, I suppose – you’re right.” She rose to her feet. “Thank you, Ahiru – I am sorry to do this to you, but I am also grateful for your understanding.”

“Of course, of course!” Ahiru nodded. “I – I’ll stay right here until it’s done simmering, and then I’ll go have lunch while it cools off and I’ll be okay. Don’t worry about me, and don’t feel bad!”

“I’ll try.” Edel smiled. “Very well. See you later, Ahiru.”

After she left Ahiru turned the clock to face herself and smoothed out the slightly wrinkled paper with the recipe on it before putting it in a spot where she could easily read it. She reviewed the instructions a couple times, then opened up her book and began to thumb through it, glancing at the cauldron after every other illustration to make sure it was still simmering and not boiling. In this way she occupied the better part of the three hours required; she eventually ran out of pictures in the book, but merely turned back to the beginning and started over. The time sometimes seemed to drag, but finally the clock told her it was past noon and thus time to extinguish the fire and let the potion cool. Ahiru did just that, in the careful and safe way that Edel had taught her several months ago, and before exiting the workroom laid a sheet of cheesecloth over the cauldron to prevent any stray bugs that might have flown into the house from landing in the cooling brew.

Her stomach rumbled as she made her way to the kitchen, reminding her of just how hungry she’d gotten while waiting for the potion to finish simmering. Her dilemma, however, was that she didn’t feel much like cooking something big, just as she’d discussed with Edel earlier, not as warm as it was now getting. A bit of poking around produced a small bowl of noodles in cheese sauce from yesterday’s lunch, and she set that to warming on the stove while she made a small sandwich using some roast beef and goat cheese. She poured herself a tall glass of strawberry lemonade as well, and sat down at the table to wait for the rest of her food to be hot enough.

She wasn’t surprised that Fakir hadn’t shown up for lunch. He hadn’t been coming home for the midday meal for a while now, not since the weather had gotten so much warmer. It just didn’t make sense to walk back in the heat, even the short distance between here and Charon’s house – the smart thing to do was to stay put and come home for dinner. It made days like today a little lonely, but Ahiru couldn’t fault him and would never express her feelings of loneliness to him, so as not to make him feel guilty about doing what was best for him. She didn’t want him to get a heat-related illness, after all, and given that he worked in a hot forge all day walking home in the sun seemed all the more likely to do that to him. It didn’t make much sense to get himself soaked in a summer rainstorm, either, as much as she would’ve enjoyed the sight of him that way.

Ahiru took her time eating, savoring the noodles and sandwich and especially the sweet, cooling lemonade. She stared out the window as she ate, looking at the trees and Edel’s small garden and watching the occasional bird. To her delight a rabbit even passed by once, and she smiled and waved at it, but it didn’t seem to see her before hopping away into the undergrowth.

After she finished washing and drying the dishes and cutlery she’d used, Ahiru headed back to the workroom to check on the potion. Despite leaving the door open, it was still nearly as stiflingly warm inside as it had been when she’d left, and the cauldron didn’t seem much less cooler, if it had cooled at all. Ahiru sighed. It was obviously going to take some time to be ready to put in the special jars Edel had left out, and she couldn’t help but worry if it would do so by the time the sun set. Would she get in trouble if it didn’t? Was there something she ought to do to help it along? She couldn’t think of anything off the top of her head, but she stood there and tried to come up with an idea anyway.

The doorbell rang as she pondered her possible course of action, interrupting her half-baked idea of somehow taking the cauldron outside, placing it under a shady tree, and fanning it to cool it off. Ahiru jerked, startled, and clapped a hand to her mouth to muffle a quack despite being very much alone in the house. She quickly regained herself, though, and rushed off to the front door to see who was visiting at such a time.

“Hello!” The person on the other side turned out, perhaps predictably, to be Hermia, looking very red in the face and more than a little tired. “Got some mail for you today!”

“Hermia! Hi!” Ahiru stepped back. “Do you want to come in and have something to drink? I – I have some lemonade…”

“I…” Hermia frowned. “I really shouldn’t, I have more deliveries to hand out… let me just get your mail for you…”

“That’s all the more reason!” Ahiru shook her head. “Please, don’t make yourself sick running around without anything to drink on a day like this… at least have some water!”

“Oh, Ahiru, I know better than that.” Hermia stopped rooting around her mailbag and produced a waterskin that clearly had very little left in it by now. “See? I carry this around with me so that I’m never thirsty.”

“But – but you’re almost out of water!” Ahiru frowned. “Please, let me refill it at least!”

“Oh no, I couldn’t impose on you like that!” Hermia shook her head and waved her hands. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I’m going to worry more if you go back out there without enough water.” Ahiru folded her arms. “Come on, please? Let me get you more water! It won’t take long, I promise, and it’ll be nice and cool and you’ll be ready to go back out and finish your route on time.”

“Hmmm…” Hermia considered it, peering at her waterskin. “… Yeah, okay, maybe you’re right.” She held it out to Ahiru. “I’ll get your mail for you while you’re doing that, though.”

“Okay.” Ahiru took the waterskin from her. “A-and please come inside while you wait, okay? If you want.”

“All right.” Hermia smiled. “Thanks.”

It only took her a few minutes to refill the waterskin; when she got back to the front hall Hermia was frowning down at some letters in her hand. “Here you go!” Ahiru said brightly. “I hope I didn’t take too long – and is everything okay?”

“Huh?” Hermia practically jumped, just as Ahiru had at the sound of the doorbell, and looked at her with wide eyes. “Oh – oh – no, no, it’s fine, it’s fine, don’t worry!” She dropped the stack of mail onto the side table. “Sorry, sorry, I was just – making sure you had everything and I wasn’t forgetting anything, haha… thanks for the water!” She snatched it out of Ahiru’s outstretched hands. “Well, then, enjoy your mail and your afternoon, I’ll be running off cause I want to finish this and get home – bye!”

“Bye…” Ahiru stared after her, feeling faintly dazed as Hermia raced out of the house and back up the path. She closed the door after her, and then went over to the table to see who all the letters were addressed to.

As she’d expected, most of them were for Edel, though she’d also gotten one of her own, from Pike. At the bottom of the stack, however, was a letter addressed to someone who most certainly did not live with them: Lysander Eckstein. Ahiru frowned at it. She didn’t recognize the handwriting at all, and no name was included in the return address. She hurried to the door and flung it back open, but by now it was too late: Hermia had already gone too far up the path and out of sight. She sighed. There was nothing else for it – she’d have to deliver it herself. Oh well, at least that would give her something to do with part of her afternoon while she waited for the potion to cool and Edel to return home.

Ahiru went back to her room and put shoes on instead of her slippers; at the front door she paused, and then after a moment’s indecision took down the parasol she’d bought at the beginning of summer. It was certainly hot enough to want protection from the sun today, and she could also hear Lady Autenberg’s voice in her head: “Don’t forget your parasol dear, you don’t need any more freckles, not if you hope to snare a husband”. Her shoulders drooped a little at the memory, and Ahiru tried to push it from her mind as she walked out of the house with the letter and locked the door behind her.

She could hear noises that sounded like they were coming from the forge, but she walked up to the front door of the main house anyway, just in case _someone_ was in there. Ahiru knocked on the door and waited. “H-hello?” she called after about a minute. “Is anybody home?” She waited again, but no one answered. Feeling a bit ridiculous for expecting any of the three men to be in there when she so clearly could hear sounds from the forge, she turned and headed round to the back.

The forge was in a separate building just behind Charon’s house, in between it and the open space before the forest where he grew a few things and had the well. She’d only been back here once, when Fakir gave her a short tour of the grounds, but it was small enough that she didn’t have to fear getting lost or turned around. When she got to the forge she found the front door ajar, and heat radiated out from it. Wishing she’d thought to bring a waterskin of her own, Ahiru closed her parasol and proceeded inside with some trepidation. What if it wasn’t okay for her to come in here?

She didn’t see anyone at first, even though the noises grew louder once she was inside the door, and the heat was almost overwhelming. Ahiru dodged around racks of weapons and displays of armor, and narrowly avoided colliding with a shelf full of odds and ends. “Hello?” she called again, hoping someone would hear her over the din.

“Ahiru? What are you doing here?”

“Fakir! I…” Ahiru’s voice dwindled into nothingness as she turned and saw Fakir emerging from around a corner. He was wiping his hands on an old rag stained with something black, and more importantly had taken his shirt off at some point. Her mouth went dry and her palms seemed to get even more slippery around the parasol as she looked at him. “I – I – um… um… I brought… I brought a letter…” She held it up in her sweat-dampened hand, and wanted to cringe at how squeaky her voice sounded. “For… for Lysander…”

Fakir’s brow creased in confusion. “I didn’t know you knew him. Well enough to write, anyway.”

“I don’t!” Ahiru shook her head, and immediately regretted it as it just made her feel dizzier. “I just… Hermia accidentally left it with our mail when she delivered it and I don’t know who it’s from but it’s addressed to him and I thought I’d bring it over right now so he wouldn’t have to wait or anything because it seemed kind of wrong to hang onto it when I know he’s over here and I have to do something with my time anyway while I wait for this potion to cool so we can put it into special jars and set it out tonight and have it absorb moonlight and then sunlight and – and… y-yeah…” She swallowed, her throat feeling drier. “Is – is that okay?”

“Yeah, that’s fine.” Fakir nodded. “Come on, he’s at the back of the forge – I’ll take you there so you can deliver it.”

“O-okay, thanks…” Ahiru waited for him to take off in the right direction and then followed. She felt lightheaded and overheated, and her heart was pounding harder than the forge’s hammers. Fakir had clearly lost none of the magnificent physique that knighthood had gifted him with – he was as lean and muscular as ever, lacking even the slightest hint of flab, with well-toned arms, broad shoulders, narrow hips, and a beautifully defined chest and stomach. His gorgeous brown skin glistened with sweat, and his long dark hair was damp with it too, making it stick to him. Even his _back_ was lovely to look at, and she sighed almost inaudibly as she walked behind him. Why did he have to be so attractive on top of everything else? Her recent dreams didn’t even _begin_ to do him justice.

All too soon they’d reached the back room, where Lysander labored away on something. Incredibly, he still had his shirt on, though he’d undone some buttons. The view didn’t compare to the one Fakir had to offer, of course, but Ahiru’s focus was elsewhere: she recalled Charon’s words about him last month, and wondered if he really did have some kind of superhuman tolerance for the heat. He looked up as the door opened, and frowned as he saw them. “Uh… is something wrong?”

“You have mail, apparently.” Fakir stepped aside to let Ahiru by, once again giving her an unhindered view of his shirtless torso. “A letter was left at the wrong house.”

“Huh?” Lysander’s frown deepened. “But… no one ever writes me _here_ …”

“Somebody did.” Keeping her eyes carefully off Fakir, Ahiru stepped forward and held out the letter. “It just got left at our house by Hermia, the girl who carries the mail… I wanted to bring it to you. Sorry for interrupting.”

“… It’s fine.” Lysander took it, and examined the handwriting. His expression didn’t really change, except to become more confused. “Huh…” He ripped the envelope open and pulled out the letter.

“Tch.” Fakir rolled his eyes. “Come on, Ahiru – let’s give him some privacy.”

“Oh! Okay!” Ahiru hurried back out of the door after Fakir, not bothering to look behind her. Rather, her gaze was now quite fixed on _Fakir’s_ behind. Had she ever had the chance to notice how firm and well-sculpted it was? Maybe not, but she certainly couldn’t ignore it _now_. She was so busy watching it as he walked that she didn’t even notice that he was leading her not the way they’d come, but a different way entirely, out to behind the forge. Ahiru blinked in surprise as the sunlight hit her face and the realization dawned. “Wh-why are we out here? You don’t have work to do?”

“I’m taking a break. And I need it.” Fakir sighed. “It’s too damn hot in there and I need to cool off.” He headed over to the well, and lowered an old wooden bucket into it. When he’d pulled it back up he set it on the edge of the well and dipped his hands into it, and splashed some water onto himself. “Ah… much better.” He let out a sigh of relief and turned to face her. “Thanks.”

“For – for – for what?” Ahiru stammered, trying not to stare at the way the water dripped down over his bare chest. Some of the drops clung to the hair that grew on him there, and the well water was obviously cool enough to have hardened his nipples despite the heat of the day. “I – I – I didn’t do anything…”

“You didn’t mean to, but you did anyway.” Fakir wiped at his forehead. “I needed to get out of that forge and that was the perfect excuse.” He rolled his shoulders and stretched his arms, and Ahiru thought for a minute that she would pass out. Even the scars on his chest from last autumn’s attack didn’t mar its perfection. _His_ physical perfection, to be more precise. Oh, he was just so… so _unfair_. “So, thanks.”

“Y-you’re, you’re welcome.” Ahiru clutched at her parasol, hoping it wouldn’t slip out of her hands and give her away. “You really are h – I mean, it really is hot today, isn’t it?” _Oh no, oh no, I wish I could disappear, I hope he didn’t realize what I almost said…_ “I was getting so warm in our house making that potion, but it’s nothing compared to in there, I can’t believe you can stand it…”

“Yeah.” Fakir turned back to the bucket of water, and cupped his hands so that he could drink a little from it. “It’s really easy to get overheated in there, and I don’t want to get sick or anything.”

“Y-yeah, I don’t want you to get sick either!” Ahiru started to shake her head again, but then decided against it – between the heat of the day and the forge and seeing Fakir like this, she still felt lightheaded and dizzy, and had no desire to make it worse. “That’d be really really bad…” She frowned. “It… it’s kind of like what Edel and I were talking about earlier, we’re both sick of summer, and I said I wished we could just skip ahead to autumn but she said we have to take the seasons as they come and let time pass normally, or something like that.”

Fakir’s hands stilled in the water for a moment. “… Yeah. She’s right.” He splashed some more water onto himself, getting some of his long hair wet. “As much as the weather right now might be awful to deal with, I don’t want to skip ahead to autumn. It really is better to live life as it happens.”

“Yeah, I know she’s right. I just…” Ahiru sighed. “I wish the weather would cool off or something soon.”

“… I know. It will soon enough, though.” He seemed to sigh too. “Anyway… you said something about a potion?

“Oh yeah…” Ahiru wiped at the back of her neck, where some sweat had built up. “I had to finish brewing this potion for Edel while she made deliveries, and I’ve been waiting for it to cool so I could put it in special jars to absorb the moonlight tonight… I guess I better go back and check it again.” What she _really_ wanted to do was stay here and stare at Fakir some more, but she doubted that was an option. “S-so, um… th-thank you for your help, and bye, and I’ll see you later, a-and don’t forget to stay cool and drink lots of water.”

“I will.” Fakir gave her a lopsided smile, and Ahiru’s knees trembled. “See you later, Ahiru.”

“See you, Fakir.” She smiled, feeling enough heat in her cheeks to set a piece of wood ablaze, and waved as she walked past him and back to the front of the main house. It was a short walk, and before she knew it she was on the path leading home.

She proceeded straightaway to the kitchen when she got there, grateful that Edel wasn’t back yet, and made herself pour some more lemonade before sinking into a chair on legs that felt about to give out. Seeing Fakir like that… it had been a revelation. She’d seen him without his shirt on when he’d been injured, of course, but changing his bandages and cleaning off blood and ointment was a very different experience from this, with his wounds healed and his skin slick with sweat. She’d only grown more attracted to him since that time, as well, and that heightened her reaction.

Ahiru had left one of the back windows open, and a cool breeze blew in through it and teased her face as she sipped her lemonade, closed her eyes, and traced over in her mind every last gorgeous detail of Fakir’s body. So much seemed burned into her brain: the lines and curves of his well-defined muscles, the perfect way his broad shoulders and chest tapered down to those narrow hips, how the water and sweat had slid down over his skin, the patches of lovely dark hair that grew on his chest between the scars and in a trail over his stomach that disappeared into his pants… not to mention the view from behind. She was sure to have a much better dream tonight than last night now that she’d seen _this_. After all, what nightmare could have a hold on her unconscious mind when it was full to the brim with such images of Fakir?

She was so absorbed in her hazy afternoon reverie that she didn’t even hear the front door open, and nearly jumped out of her chair in surprise when Edel walked into the kitchen. “Oh – oh, Edel! Y-you’re back!”

“Yes, thankfully.” Edel poured herself some lemonade, and then sank into a chair at the table with a deep sigh. “How have things been here?”

“Well, I…” Ahiru squirmed. “I got the potion all finished, and then I went to eat lunch while it cooled, and it still wasn’t cool after that and then Hermia brought the mail and it’s all still in the hall, sorry, cause she accidentally left a letter for Lysander so I took it over to him and I just got back and was cooling off cause the – the forge is really hot and it’s hot outside, and I haven’t checked the potion again, I’m so sorry…”

“It’s fine.” Edel waved her hand weakly, and took a long gulp of lemonade. “On a day like today, I doubt it’ll be cool enough for some time yet. But we’ll check on it together after _I’ve_ cooled off a bit. Don’t worry about it.”

“A-all right.”

Just as Edel had guessed, the potion still hadn’t cooled enough yet, and wouldn’t be ready to store until dinner time. Only then did they transfer it into the proper jars, which they carried into the kitchen to wait for sundown. Fakir came home while they were busy cleaning the cauldron; he was fully dressed again, and went straight into a bath to wash the grime and sweat of the day off. Ahiru managed to look him in the eye and talk normally to him while they all had dinner, and would forever privately wonder how she’d done it. But as she lay in bed sleeping much later that night, the thoughts that at first had kept her awake soon translated themselves into a dream.

It started with her walking up the path to Charon’s, much like she had that afternoon. No one answered the door at the main house, so she walked past it. The forge sat still and silent and cold, its doors shut tight and locked, and Ahiru kept going, barely bothering to glance at it as she went by. She knew, somehow, that what she sought awaited her beyond it. The scent of roses filled the air, the trees of the forest rustled in the breeze, and her excitement grew with every step.

And as she’d known he would be, Fakir awaited her at the well. His back was turned at first as he drank from the bucket, but he turned at the sound of her footsteps and their eyes met. Water dripped down over his bare chest and her breath caught at the way he looked at her; not even a second passed before she rushed to him. He took her into his arms without hesitation and lifted her up, only to set her down on the edge of the well, her back against the low, small roof and its sturdy support. She whispered his name and touched his cheek with a shaking hand as he leaned his forehead against hers. It lasted only a fleeting moment, however, before he pressed his mouth to hers, giving her a tender kiss. His lips were soft and wet, and Ahiru kissed him hungrily, desperate and aching for him. He held her close, deepening the kiss in response to her reaction, and his breathing was loud and harsh when they finally parted for air.

Fakir didn’t even open his eyes at first when the kiss broke off, and Ahiru took the opportunity to let her gaze drink him all in. She caressed his cheek and then his neck before sliding her hand down over his chest, feeling his heart pound beneath her palm and tracing her fingertips over the long scar, raking them through the hair that grew around it. He trembled at her touch, and his eyes when he opened them were dark and half-lidded with desire for her. He kissed her again, with even more desperation and need than before, and his hands began to roam over her body, touching her in places no one aside from her ever had before. She broke off the kiss and moaned, and then pressed her lips to Fakir’s neck, right where his pulse throbbed erratically. He groaned softly, and one of his hands moved to the back of her dress to begin undoing it. His movements were so uncharacteristically clumsy that she heard one of her buttons pop off and fall into the well, but she didn’t care, not when she could feel those calloused fingertips on her back now. He all but tore off another button, and another, and another, until her dress was ready to be pulled off, and then –

“Ahiru? Ahiru, wake up.”

“… Huh?” She opened her eyes slowly and blinked at the darkness, more than a little disoriented by the sudden shift from dream to wakefulness. “Wh-what’s… what’s going…”

“I’m sorry to wake you, but it’s urgent.” It was Edel. “The prince’s messenger is at the door – Princess Rue has just given birth, and requires our presence at the castle for the performance of protection rituals around the newborn. We must hurry.”

“O-oh.” Ahiru yawned. “Okay, I… I’ll be right there…”

Edel said something she barely heard, and closed the door as she left. Ahiru sighed. Relieved as she was that Edel hadn’t been able to tell what kind of dream she’d been having, it was nevertheless disappointing to have been jarred out of it before it finished. Ahiru let herself dwell on the lingering images in her mind a little more, and then sighed again before she reluctantly climbed out of bed and made herself as presentable as she could possibly get at this hour.

Edel awaited her at the front door once she was ready, a basket already packed full of what they’d need. They climbed into the royal coach that had been brought by the messenger, and as they rode off Edel explained that she’d been told the princess could give birth any day now and so had had the necessary supplies prepared already. She hadn’t, however, been as prepared as she would have liked to have been for the possibility of it happening in the middle of the night, a fact she related with a wry smile. Ahiru tried to laugh, but she was too busy yawning. Interrupted erotic dreams aside, it was still no fun thing to be woken and dragged out of bed before the sun had even really risen. The sky hadn’t yet moved beyond a dull grey color by the time they arrived at the castle, and Ahiru had to restrain a sigh and wonder how long this would take and if she’d be able to squeeze in at least an hour’s sleep before breakfast when they got back home.

A tired-looking maid met them just inside the castle doors, and escorted them upstairs to the royal bedchamber. Inside they found Prince Siegfried sprawled in an armchair by the cold and empty fireplace, asleep, and Rue propped up in bed looking barely awake herself with a crib close by.

“Edel. Ahiru.” Rue managed a smile, despite the utter exhaustion evident on her face. “Thank you ever so much for coming on such short notice, and at such an hour… I do apologize.”

“Think nothing of it.” Edel shook her head. “We are but glad that you and the child are both safe and healthy, and are pleased to do our part to see that your newborn remains so.”

“Yes, that is…” Rue yawned. “Of paramount importance to me as well. I would not see my son abducted by the Fair Folk, not if I could do anything at all to prevent it.”

“Oh, you had a boy?” Ahiru tried not to yawn too – contagious though it was, it didn’t seem at all appropriate under the circumstances. “Congratulations!”

“Yes, Siegfried was well pleased too.” Rue cast an amused glance at her sleeping husband. “Which is not to say that he would have been unhappy had I bestowed him with a girl, but it does simplify things, does it not, to right away have an heir capable of carrying on his family name? He told me that his poor mother always did fret so about that, given that he was an only child… she will be much relieved to hear this news, I believe. Just as much as Siegfried himself was, for he too had…” She stopped. “Well, enough babble from me, I do believe I am boring you with royal affairs and rambling on in my overtired state.” She laughed. “Please, do what you must.”

“Well, first of all…” Edel cleared her throat. “Has the child been named? The risk to him will be much reduced if that ceremony has been performed.”

“Oh, yes, of course he has.” Rue nodded. “The priestess performed the proper ceremony while I sent the messenger to fetch you both, never fear. It will be performed again for the public, as a way to formally announce his name of course, but in truth his name has already been chosen and bound to him. That much I know about what must be done to protect a child from the Folk.”

“Very well then.” Edel set her basket down on a nearby table that, miraculously, had just enough space on it. “Since that is done, we will simply need to lay iron in and around the cradle, at the entrance to this room, and at all doors leading into the palace.”

“Ah, the cold iron.” Rue yawned again, though something in her eyes seemed to flicker as well. “It is always present here, as I suspect it is in many other households within the land, but one can never have too much of it.”

“Indeed.” Edel lifted the cloth from the basket and took out a horseshoe. “No harm can come of being overly cautious in such matters, and this I promise you, your majesty: your son will be safe from the Fair Folk thanks to our precautions.”

“Thank you.” Rue yawned. “I trust you with our lives, Edel, so if it will not bother you, I fear I must be terribly rude and take my rest for now while you work.”

“It isn’t rude at all.” Edel smiled. “You have been through much. Sleep, and sleep soundly in the knowledge that your child is in good health and well-protected.”

“I thank you again.” Rue’s eyes went to Ahiru. “And you as well, Ahiru – it is good to see you. I…” She let out yet another deep yawn. “Hope you will attend the naming ceremony as well… and I may yet ask the both of you for help with additional wardings beforehand.”

“I – I’d be happy to!” Ahiru smiled. “Now go ahead and sleep, you need it.”

“That I do. That I most certainly do.” Rue smiled and closed her eyes, and within minutes was fast asleep.

They spent roughly an hour placing and affixing iron in all the necessary places around the castle; at the end of their work breakfast was offered to them by the castle staff, but Edel declined, and so they simply rode home in the royal carriage. Ahiru returned to her room when they got there, and dozed on the bed in her clothes until Edel came in to tell her that it was time to eat and then head to the market afterwards.


	25. Chapter 25

Balancing her bag of bird seed on one arm, Ahiru eased the back door open and tiptoed out. She closed it as quietly as she could after exiting the house, and then headed over the short distance to where a nearly-empty bowl sat on her window sill. She then opened up the bag and carefully began to pour its contents  into the bowl, stopping often as she was afraid of over-filling it and having a mess of wasted seed on the ground. Well, not really, the birds would find and eat it anyway, but still – she wanted to do this as neatly as possible. It took her a little longer than it should have to fill it satisfactorily, but once she had she closed up the bag and stepped back.

No sooner had she moved away than a flurry of flapping wings filled the air as a bevy of birds flocked up. Most landed on the sill and began pecking away at the seed in the bowl, but some landed on Ahiru’s shoulders and even on her head. She couldn’t help but giggle, and giddiness spread through her. She did so love birds, and it was nice to feel like they definitely liked her too.

The birds were so enthusiastic in their appreciation for fresh food that she didn’t hear the next window over opening, but she definitely heard the voice that came out of it. “Hey, Ahiru.”

“Qua - !” Ahiru clapped a hand over her mouth, and nearly dropped the bag of seed; the birds that had landed on her flew up into the air and moved to some empty spots that had opened up on the sill. “H-hey, Fakir…” She walked over to his window, suddenly self-conscious of the fact that she’d left the house in just her nightgown and robe. Fakir wasn’t any more decent, though, leaning on his window sill in his sleep clothes that were open just enough to let her get a tantalizing peek at part of his chest. She swallowed and made her eyes focus on his face (and tried to ignore the way his beautiful dark hair fell so messily around it). “Morning… you’re up early…”

“Not really.” He yawned. “At least, not that much earlier than I should be for today.”

“True.” Ahiru adjusted the bag in her arms. “Sorry, you don’t have to come with us like this, I know it’ll be boring for you and you’re up earlier than you’d have to be.”

“Don’t be sorry.” He shrugged. “It’s not that much earlier, and it just makes more sense to accompany you than to wait at home and then leave on my own, or make you come back and get me. That’d be ridiculous.”

“Yeah, I know, but still.” Ahiru sighed. “It won’t be any fun for you to have to just stand around and wait for us to be done with the protection spells and wards.”

“That’s not true – I can use that time to talk to Siegfried and catch up.” Fakir ran a hand through his hair. “It’s been a while since I’ve seen him.”

“Oh yeah, that’s right.” Ahiru nodded. “You haven’t seen him since, um… back in February, right?” She shifted, feeling awkward.

“No, I’ve seen him a couple times since.” Fakir looked away, past Ahiru. “Very briefly, but… well, there will be a lot to catch up on.”

“Yeah, I imagine he’s been really busy, and you’ve been busy too. I’m glad you’re… that you’re still friends, though, cause you should have other friends too.” Fakir’s storming out of the house and staying away for hours on end after that visit from Siegfried and Rue weren’t things she wanted to openly address. “I – I feel a little less bad about you being dragged along early, then.”

“Good.” Fakir smiled, and her heart beat a little faster. “I don’t want you to feel bad at all, really, because it’s my choice. If I wanted to stay behind, I would, so don’t go beating yourself up over nothing. Not that I think that’ll stop you, but…”

“Shush!” Ahiru stuck her tongue out at him, and he laughed. “We’ve been over this before, you’re the same way!”

“True.” He smiled again. “Anyway, if I’m going to accompany you, I’d better start getting ready.” He reached up to close the shutters. “See you at breakfast.”

“See you!” Ahiru found herself waving at the closed shutters, and swiftly lowered her hand, feeling silly. She then adjusted the bag in her arms again and hurried back inside the house, as she needed to get dressed and ready too.

For today was the first of August, and at the palace awaited Prince Siegfried, Princess Rue, and their newborn son. She and Edel would perform some simple protection spells and wards as needed, and then attend the grand naming ceremony for the child. Other than the three of them, only nobility would attend, with a royal proclamation stating the new heir’s name going out through the whole of the principality upon the ceremony’s conclusion. They were exceptions due to their jobs, and Fakir’s friendship with the prince and status as a former knight.

Ahiru dressed herself in her nicest gown and put her hair up in a simple bun, her eyes frequently straying to what she could see of the sky outside her window. It was startlingly blue, or at least it was where she could see patches of it in between thick clouds. The clouds were fluffy and white, so she didn’t feel like rain was threatening to ruin the event, but it did indicate that it would be a very humid day. She sighed; they’d been having quite a bit of those lately. The weather was ever so slightly cooler now temperature wise, but the damp, thick air made it feel worse. Her only consolation was that autumn would hopefully arrive by the end of the month and provide relief. They certainly needed it after this ongoing heat wave.

Edel was in the kitchen by the time she got there, and Fakir arrived at the same time, having donned his nicest clothes and brushed and tied back his hair. Baskets full of the items they required for the spellwork and wards to be done at the palace sat on the table, having already been packed by Ahiru and Edel the previous night; they had just enough time after eating the morning meal and cleaning up from it to check them over again before the doorbell rang.

“That’ll be the royal carriage.” Edel pulled the cloth back over one of the baskets. “Are you all ready? I’m certain we could ask for a few extra minutes before departure, but I’d prefer not to keep the prince and princess waiting overlong.”

“I – I’m ready!” Ahiru took the other basket and slipped it over her arm. “I don’t need a few minutes.”

“Same here.” Fakir stood and pushed his chair back under the table; he’d helped clean up, of course, but had sat and waited while they did inventory on their supplies. “Let’s go.”

They boarded the carriage that awaited them outside the front door, with Fakir and Ahiru choosing to sit together across from Edel, and were soon on their way to the castle. Rue had insisted that they ride to the ceremony in style, as they were honored guests, and as there was no good reason to turn it down they’d accepted her offer. They’d be walking back afterwards, as Edel needed to stop and buy a few things at the market, but that was all right. Ahiru only hoped the heat and humidity wouldn’t be too much to handle by the time the ceremony ended.

No sooner had they disembarked than a servant hurried up to escort them into the palace; he showed them to the large chapel where the wedding had taken place, and then left. A cauldron had been set up in the center space where the vows had been taken, and the room had been decorated elegantly with banners bearing the royal colors and its swan coat of arms. Siegfried and Rue were already there as well, and rose from their seats as the three entered.

“Welcome, welcome.” Siegfried spoke first, moving across the room in their direction as Rue followed close behind. “Thank you again, for agreeing to perform these necessary rites.” He bowed in response to Edel and Ahiru curtseying, and then extended his hand to Fakir, who, Ahiru noticed, hesitated only slightly before taking and shaking it with his own. “It means the world to us to see the three of you here, truly.”

“Nonsense.” Edel shook her head. “It is we who are honored, to be asked to do something of such importance.”

“Well, who else would we ask?” Rue stepped forward to stand at her husband’s side. It had been barely a week since she’d given birth, yet she looked as radiant as ever, and smiled warmly at them. “You are the best in the land, I have been told, and I believe it after all that I have seen, particularly after you protected us so well at our wedding. Additionally, there have been no odd occurrences of any kind since we welcomed our child into this world, proving your skill once more.”

“I would not say we, rather… I would say that _you_ welcomed him into this world.” Siegfried looked faintly amused. “After all, you are the one who carried him all those months, and went through the difficulties of labor and giving birth… you alone shouldered those risks.” The humor disappeared from his eyes, replaced by a somewhat haunted look. “If – if you should have perished…” He trailed off, shuddering.

“Oh now, there is no need to worry, for I have come through quite all right.” Rue laid a comforting hand on Siegfried’s arm. “I do understand how you feel, however – if I ever were to lose you, I fear my heart would break irreparably.” Something flickered in her eyes, and her expression became a strange thing for a moment – almost reproachful, yet also drawn with fear and sadness. It vanished too soon for Ahiru to make sense of, however.

“… I know.” Siegfried laid his hand over Rue’s. “And I assure you that I shall always take care to make sure that I do not leave you prematurely.”

“Yes, see that you do.” Rue’s smile didn’t quite reach her eyes, which then flicked over to Fakir. “Ah, Fakir – I see you have come along as well. Interested in learning the arts of witchcraft alongside Ahiru? It is a most noble profession, so I cannot blame you.”

“No.” Fakir shook his head. “I’m just here because it made more sense to accompany them than to come alone later.”

“I’m glad you did,” Siegfried said, interrupting what Rue opened her mouth to say in response. “It’s been a while since we’ve been able to sit and talk, and while these two ladies do their work seems like a good time for it.”

“Yeah.” Fakir turned his attention to Siegfried. “It’s good to see you – it _has_ been a while.”

“Too long.” Siegfried smiled. “Come, let us sit down over here and get to catching up.”

Fakir followed Siegfried over to a couple of the richly upholstered chairs that had been brought in and set in a circle around the center space; Rue then turned her gaze to Ahiru. “His saying that does remind me that it has been far too long since I have really been able to speak with you, Ahiru.” Her smile became more genuine and warm, as did her dark eyes. “I know we saw each other the morning I gave birth, but I cannot consider that to count, for I was quite distracted, and exhausted beyond measure. How have you been? Do your studies go well? Tell me all you wish to tell.”

“W-well, I…” Ahiru paused. Indeed, their last real conversation had been when Rue had her here for tea, and she didn’t recall that day particularly fondly, to say the least. “I’ve been doing really well in my studies, I’m learning so much still, and I went to a friend’s wedding back in May, and… there isn’t much more to tell than that, sorry.” She hung her head.

“Oh, no, please do not feel poorly about yourself.” Rue shook her head. “Your continued wellbeing alone is enough to give me happiness. And I am ever so pleased that you could be here to celebrate my happiness with me on this momentous day.”

“Th-thanks, I – it’s like Edel said, I’m just honored that I could be here.” Ahiru glanced around the chapel. “Can – can I ask why you’re holding it in here instead of outside, though?”

“You most certainly may.” Rue looked amused. “And the answer would be that we felt it much more sensible to keep it a strictly indoor affair. Which is not to say that there is not much to be appreciated about being out of doors, and it is true that the summer sky would be a most resplendent backdrop to this joyous occasion. However, the weather of late has been so damp and unpredictable that we feared the rain coming to spoil it. It is only our child that we wish to baptize, after all, not all of our guests.” She laughed.

“That is wise of you.” Edel nodded. “A great many people choose to conduct their various celebrations entirely indoors for that precise reason: the sheer unpredictability of weather, no matter the time of year.”

“Yes, I have learned that since coming here.” Rue nodded back at her. “In any case, I have no wish to keep you from your work, so please, proceed.”

“Thank you.” Edel nodded. “We shall try to work as swiftly as possible, so as not to interfere with your schedule.”

Rue expressed her gratitude for that, and then Edel and Ahiru got to unpacking the things they’d need for the protection spells. The iron wards they’d put around the whole of the castle after Rue had given birth were still in place, and they’d gotten more scraps from Charon to do additional ones in here. Protection powder and powder of blessings would be carefully scattered at the edges of the room too, and charms for both purposes would be affixed to various spots as well. Edel handed Ahiru the jar of powder of blessings, and went over with her again on how to spread it and what to whisper to activate it, as well as deciding which routes they would take around the room so as not to bump into each other and interfere with the other’s work. Once they were ready and assured of how to accomplish their tasks, they began.

The ritual of blessings required Ahiru to stop every few feet and recite the proper incantation in order to ensure that what she had already scattered worked properly; with such a large room to bless, it seemed as though it would take forever. She slowly but surely made progress, even though it didn’t feel like it, and eventually came round to a spot where she could hear Siegfried and Fakir’s conversation. They sat a bit distant from her, their backs turned, but if she focused she could listen in. As she didn’t actually want to infringe on their privacy, she made herself concentrate on spreading the powder. But just as she’d opened her mouth to whisper the required words again, something they were talking about caught her attention, and despite herself she paused to listen.

“You must be relieved.”

“Oh, more than I can express, though surely you can guess.” Siegfried sighed. “For her to have conceived so soon after our marriage… it was a blessing beyond reckoning, and I cannot be grateful enough that she enlisted Edel in boosting our chances, I truly believe that that made a difference. That alone set my mind at ease.”

“I’m sure. And to have a male heir your first try… that probably makes it even better.”

“ _Yes._ ” She heard Siegfried shift in his seat. “Not that we wouldn’t have cherished a girl as well, and I confess to dearly hoping for one as our next child, whenever that may be, but now the matter of carrying on the royal line and the family name has been secured. One less worry off my mind, and off my mother’s as well.” He paused. “And you know better than anyone else, perhaps, how much that weighed on me.”

“… Yeah. I’m glad you’ve got that settled now. I mean it.”

“Thank you, Fakir.” Siegfried sounded even more relieved and happy now. “Truly, I cannot express how it makes me feel to hear that – for I have always worried about the cost to you of the choice I made back then. It sets my heart at ease to know that your assurances were earnestly meant, for I could not bear to know that I’d harmed you irreparably.”

“You didn’t. Don’t worry. And I really do mean it – I know your responsibilities and what burdens you carry, and I understand. You did what you had to do, and I don’t begrudge you it.”

Ahiru stood rooted to the spot, her task all but forgotten. Carry on the family name... Rue had spoken of that when they’d visited her right after she gave birth, but she somehow hadn't connected it all until now, with Siegfried’s words about the “choice” he’d made and how it had impacted Fakir. To be fair, she'd been tired and distracted and wanting to go home, but all the same, how hadn't she seen it until now? Siegfried was the man Fakir had fallen in love with, that maybe he _still_ loved. Given his professed closeness with Siegfried and the glowing way he'd spoken of him at times, she felt like a fool for not putting it all together much sooner. No _wonder_ things were so tense and awkward between him and Rue. It begged so many questions: did Rue know that Fakir and Siegfried had briefly been lovers? And if she knew, how much had she been told? Did she suspect that Fakir’s feelings had lingered longer and gone deeper than he’d admitted to Siegfried? Had the two ever spoken to each other about his past dalliance with her husband? It was like putting a puzzle together and seeing the pieces slide into place to form a picture. Part of one, at least.

She shook her head as if to clear it, and started to recite the incantation only to have her voice falter as Fakir spoke again. “Which is why it’s important for you not to do foolish things.”

“I know.” She couldn’t see Siegfried’s face, but he had the tone of voice of someone wincing at having been reproached. “All I can say in my defense is that I never claimed _not_ to be a fool, as paltry a defense as that is. And…” He paused again. “Please, I would ask you again – will you –”

“ _No_ ,” Fakir said, cutting him off before he could finish his request. “I’ve already told you, I’m done discussing that subject. And this isn’t the time or place anyway.”

“But you are the one who… oh, never mind.” Siegfried sighed, and then chuckled wryly. “There’s no arguing with you, I know that already. But I should not be condemned for trying.”

“Hmph.” Fakir shifted in his seat. “Is your mother going to be here today?”

“No, unfortunately, she’s –”

They moved on to discussing his mother’s health and Siegfried and Rue’s plans to depart on a visit to her estate within the next week, and Ahiru let it once again become background chatter while she finished saying the words of the spell again and moved on. She wanted to kick herself for not realizing sooner that Fakir had been speaking of Siegfried when he’d talked about his first love, but restrained herself as that would only attract undue attention.

Still, her mind kept racing with thoughts about it all as she continued spreading the powder. She thought about how much it had clearly broken his heart to have it end like that, despite knowing and understanding why Siegfried had done it, and how his pain and his love had lingered on. She couldn’t stop thinking about Rue, either, and another puzzle piece floated tentatively into place: the strange tea. Had _that_ been why Rue had asked so many questions about what Fakir was doing these days? Was she trying to get confirmation that he didn’t still long for Siegfried and didn’t want to break up their marriage? Did she feel she owed him a debt for accepting the breakup so gracefully despite the feelings she suspected he still held for Siegfried? There were so many possibilities, and Ahiru wasn’t sure which one could be the truth. Knowing what had passed between Siegfried and Fakir had helped her to make _some_ sense out of the tangled dynamics of those three, but not all of it. So many questions still remained.

 _None of them are any of your business, though_ , Ahiru reminded herself. _If Fakir had wanted to tell you the name of the man he’d loved, he would have. You weren’t meant to overhear that just now, so stay out of it and mind your own affairs._ She shook her head again, this time as if to reprimand herself, and then put her full focus on her work.

After she and Edel had finished spreading and activating the powders, it came time to affix the various charms around the room. As they did, Rue sat in a chair near the center of the room and watched them with interest, occasionally calling out a question to Edel and chatting with her about magic and how fascinating she found it. Every once in a while, though, Ahiru saw her glance over at Siegfried and Fakir, her expression unreadable. It didn’t bother her so much the first time, but after it happened a few _more_ times, she found herself bristling with irritation on Fakir’s behalf. Did Rue honestly think that he’d try to rekindle a romantic relationship with a happily married man, especially now that that man was a father as well as a husband?  Even if Fakir _was_ still in love with Siegfried at this point, there was no way he’d ever try to interfere in his friend’s marriage and come between him and his wife. Fakir had morals and integrity, he respected the choice Siegfried had made and was trying to get past their brief affair. If Rue thought otherwise of him, well, then, she didn’t know Fakir very well at _all_. It explained her animosity, but she couldn’t help but be irked at how poorly founded it seemed.

Then again, it still felt like she only had part of the story. Something nagged at her – there surely were things she still couldn’t see, and so many unanswered questions. But, as she’d already reminded herself just now, it was really none of her business. Fakir had protected Siegfried’s privacy by keeping his identity secret when he’d confessed the story of their involvement to her, and she had to respect that. Accident or not, it hadn’t been right to listen in on what they’d said. She would just have to do her best to pretend that she’d heard nothing, and that she didn’t know any more than she had yesterday about the odd tension among the three. Particularly since Fakir didn’t want Siegfried knowing that his feelings really had run deeper and lingered longer than he’d told him; she couldn’t betray his trust and jeopardize a friendship that was obviously still very important to him. As curious as she was about how Siegfried could be so oblivious and how much Rue knew, it wasn’t her place to poke around. She had no right. So she wouldn’t.

Ahiru made herself think of other things while she and Edel set up the wards. She let her mind drift to the book she was reading for Mr. Katz, to tarot lessons and food preservation. The wards didn’t take long enough to arrange to give her the time she needed to completely push the topic of the conversation she’d eavesdropped on out of her thoughts, but she at least felt more confident in her ability to converse normally with everyone for at least a few minutes, even if she couldn’t quite bring herself to look Fakir or Siegfried in the eye. When she and Edel finished they returned to the center of the chapel, and the other three rose from their seats. Fakir and Siegfried made their way to the center as well, and Rue moved to her husband’s side while Fakir walked over to stand next to Ahiru.

“Everything is done to your satisfaction, I take it?” Siegfried asked Edel.

She nodded. “Yes. The powders of protection and blessings have been put in place, as have the charms and wards. All shall be safe, and fortune is sure to smile upon you and all your guests this day.”

“Which includes you, naturally.” Rue smiled and leaned against Siegfried, who slipped his arm around her. “Will you please wait in a sitting room until it is time for the ceremony? One of the maids will show you the way, we have seen to it that a special one is set aside for you. For you all are very special guests indeed.” Did her eyes flicker briefly over to Fakir? Ahiru couldn’t be sure. “You have all helped us to achieve happiness in some way – my gratitude is boundless, and I fear I shall never repay the debts.”

“Nonsense, you owe us nothing.” Edel smiled. “We’re pleased to be able to assist you and preserve your joy so that it isn’t stolen from you.”

“Yes… it would be a terrible thing indeed for anything to be cut short.” Rue brushed a stray curl out of her eyes. “Now then, I do apologize, but we must be returning to our chambers and cannot stay to converse with you. For the hour draws near, and there is much for us both to do just yet.”

“We understand.” Edel nodded. “Do what you must, we will wait as you have requested in the assigned room.”

“Thank you. Oh, but –” Rue slipped out of Siegfried’s arm and walked forward, and seized Ahiru’s hands in hers. “I wish to thank you personally once more, Ahiru – I see your talent and appreciate that you have helped Edel with securing the safety of my family, and I do hope to see you again soon, whether it is at tea or some other event.” She squeezed her hands. “If I do not speak to you again today, take care.”

“I – I will!” Ahiru smiled. “Thank you, a-and you too, I hope everything goes smoothly!”

“I have little doubt about that.” Rue smiled again. “Farewell for now.”

Just outside the chapel, a maid waited to escort them to the private sitting room that Rue had spoken of. It was a medium-sized room, not too large but not very small either, furnished as elegantly as the rest of the palace, in shades of gold, white, and pale blue. The tall windows had been left open to allow in the morning breeze, and the maid who’d brought them there asked if they wanted tea; Fakir declined, but Ahiru and Edel agreed that some would be nice.

They’d just barely finished drinking their tea when two maids hurried in to tell them that it was time for everyone to get seated for the ceremony. The one who’d escorted them in set to straightening up from the tea they’d had, while the other led them back to the chapel. This time around, things were somewhat more organized than the wedding – there was still a bit of confusion, but it was sorted out much more quickly and they found themselves seated rather promptly, and did not have to move once they’d settled down. Ahiru got the seat in between Edel and Fakir, with a fairly good – for now – view of the center area, which was in the process of being consecrated by the priestess. At the sight of a few taller people moving back and forth in front of her, and more than once seeming like someone would sit down and block her view, a thought bubbled up in Ahiru: what if, in the event of her line of sight being disrupted like that, she sat on Fakir’s lap? Despite everything, she wanted to giggle at the idea, and nearly did before restraining herself. He would probably make a very good chair, and she’d easily be able to see everything, and he’d have to hold her in place so she wouldn’t slide off… oh, how nice it’d be! The only problem, of course, was that he’d sputter and bluster and refuse, and she really couldn’t blame him. So off into the realm of pleasant but unrealistic fantasies it went.

The priestess finished consecrating the space just before everyone had been seated, and signaled to a servant that then went rushing off. The crowd murmured amongst themselves as they all waited, but then a hush fell as the doors at the back of the chapel opened. Two servants held them open to allow Prince Siegfried and Princess Rue to walk through. Both had changed into more formal garb, and Rue carried the royal infant in her arms. Some oohing and ahhing went up through the guests as the two made their way to the center, but all went silent once they’d stepped into the sacred circle. Prince Siegfried smiled as he gazed around at everyone, as did Rue, and then he began to speak.

“Welcome to you all, honored guests, cherished family, and dear friends.” His voice seemed to echo from the chamber’s ceiling. “We are immensely grateful to you for consenting to share this joyous day with us. The honor is truly ours, for we are blessed beyond measure to have so many good people to partake in our celebration.” He paused to clear his throat, and then continued. “You have welcomed my beloved princess into your hearts, and so now I ask you to also welcome our son, the heir to my throne who will one day rule this land after I have passed on and exist only in memory. He will, no doubt, be composed of the best of us both, and I ask you only to love him as we do. He will be raised to respect and love the land and its citizens in return, to carry on the family’s legacy of being caretakers of the land and protectors of the people.”

Rue stepped forward – evidently this was her cue. “My people, though you had no obligation to show me acceptance or welcome me to Schwangau, you did so anyway, and my heart is full of love and gratitude for you. It is my dearest wish and hope that you extend your kindness also to our child, that they may love you and know your love in return, just as I and Siegfried do. I cannot begin to thank you all enough for what you have done, and what you may yet do, and I swear upon my life that I shall endeavor to be a princess worthy of your trust and care.”

“And so, it is without further ado that we introduce our firstborn child to you.” Siegfried nodded at Rue. “He will receive the blessings of the elements in a baptism, but first his name must be known to all of this land.”

Rue set the baby down carefully on the altar that had been placed beside the cauldron, in the center of the circle. “Thus do we present to you Friedhold Weiss, heir to Schwangau.”

Uproarious applause followed that statement, accompanied by loud cheers and shouts of congratulation. When it all died down the priestess stepped forward to take over the ceremony. She lit a small fire under the cauldron, and dipped Friedhold into the water within. The blessings of water, fire, air, earth, and spirits were called down upon him, and Siegfried and Rue spoke oaths in which they vowed to love, cherish, protect, and guide their child as he grew.

A form of chaos reigned again as the ceremony concluded, but the servants, having learned from what had happened last October at the wedding, quickly and efficiently organized it and got things more or less under control. Rue and Siegfried took Friedhold with them out of the chapel one way, while the guests were herded in groups out of the other doors so as to avoid any of them becoming clogged and overcrowded. Ahiru worried that she would lose Fakir and Edel in the confusion as she had at Halloween, but just before she would’ve been jostled away from her companions Fakir gently took hold of her hand, and helped her stay with him and Edel until they were well out of the congestion.

As most of the guests were nobles and courtiers who were staying at the palace, they had little trouble getting to the main gates once they’d fetched the baskets they’d brought their supplies in. Those nobles who lived in estates in town either milled about the palace speaking to others of their class, or had themselves escorted to where their carriages were being prepared for their departure. Few people actually walked out through the front of the castle as Edel, Fakir, and Ahiru did, and so once they got outside the palace doors they were largely unhindered, save for having to dodge around servants and knights rushing to and fro.

“To the market, then?” Ahiru asked as they walked through the courtyard. “Or do you not feel like it anymore?”

“Yes, I think the market now.” Edel cast a critical glance up at the sky. It was as cloudy as it had been before the ceremony, but it didn’t look like rain, only like the humid and overly warm day they could already feel it becoming. “I think the weather should mostly cooperate, in that we won’t get caught in a downpour. But all the same, let us make it quick, so that we don’t have to be outside in the worst of the heat.”

“Sounds good to me,” Fakir muttered.

They continued walking on, and would have gone right past the castle gates and back into the city if someone hadn’t spoken just as they exited. “Ah… so it is over, then?”

“Hmmm?” Edel turned to look for the source of the voice – a tall, thin man with dark hair and eyes, dressed in black clothes that at first glance looked plain, then on second inspection seemed more expensive. “Do you refer to the naming ceremony for the young heir? Because yes, that has reached its conclusion.”

“Ah, I feared as much.” He shook his head, a mournful look coming into his eyes. “Such a shame.”

“You’ve only just missed it; did you misread the time stated on your invitation?” Edel frowned slightly.

“Ah, what a splendid honor it would have been to receive an invitation… a pity that no such thing was forthcoming at any time, an occurrence which left me terribly distressed, I will confess to you.” His voice was scratchy, yet oddly musical at the same time. “It is not the first such slight that has been committed against me, yet I did have some expectation that this event would perhaps be different. Quite the fool I am, am I not?”

“I… don’t know.” Edel’s frown deepened, yet her tone remained polite. “Did you have reason to expect to be invited? Are you acquainted with the parents?”

“You might say that.” He laughed. “But at the same time, perhaps not. For the Lady Rue seems determined to cast all who knew her in her previous home aside, and while I should not have been surprised at her indifference and ingratitude continuing, I nevertheless am deeply disappointed to have another display of it.”

“Oh… so you are related to her?” Edel raised an eyebrow. “I don’t mean to be rude, but maybe your relationship with her was not quite as cordial as you think.”

“You guess right, fair lady – I am one of her relations. As to your question, well…” He shrugged. “It is true that we have quarreled from time to time, as all families do. To have her turn her back entirely on all her relations and her former home, however, that I did not expect. She has shown no gratitude or love, and become a most unkind girl indeed. She snubbed us at her wedding, and rejected all attempts to communicate… yet still, I had hoped she might relent and share this day with us.” He sighed. “I came here with the intent of attending and bestowing my own blessing upon the child, and held onto a thought that the invitation might have simply been mislaid, but found the way shut against me.” He sighed again. “So it is with a heavy heart that I must grudgingly accept her disinterest in reconciliation, and retreat.”

“Well… I don’t pretend to know all the details and I don’t feel it is any of my business or place to interfere, but…” Edel pursed her lips. “If you’d like, I can deliver a message to her for you.”

“That will not be necessary.” He straightened his posture, making him seem even taller. “You are kind, but I will not ask anything of you.” His gaze traveled over to Ahiru, and then to Fakir, and then back to Edel. “I will depart now, and regale you with my sad tale no longer… take care. All of you.” He tipped his hat to them, and then turned and walked away down a street draped in shadows, seeming almost to disappear into them.

“… What a strange man,” Edel said once they were sure he was out of earshot. “No doubt some kind of opportunist Princess Rue has good reason to want to bar from her life.”

“Y-yeah, I don’t think he was telling us everything.” Ahiru shivered. “And I don’t think Rue would be mean like that and just cut people out of her life if they weren’t bad people.”

“Precisely.” Edel started walking again. “Come on, let’s go to the market and then get home.”

Ahiru followed along, as did Fakir, though he seemed to be lagging behind a bit. She looked up at him, the first time she’d dared to do so since that eavesdropped conversation, and received a shock when she looked at his face: his complexion looked as washed-out as it had the day of his injuries last November, when he’d lost so much blood, and his expression was that of someone trying to bury some sort of unhappy feelings. “Fakir… Fakir, are you okay?” Ahiru whispered.

“Huh?” Fakir looked down at her, and his eyes seemed to take a moment to focus on her face. “I… I’m fine. I… why do you ask?”

“Cause you don’t look fine.” Ahiru shook her head. “You look – well, I guess pale isn’t the right word, but you look like you did after you got attacked and you lost all that blood. Are you feeling all right?”

“I’m fine,” Fakir repeated. “I’m a bit hot in these clothes, though – I need to get home and change into something else and have something to drink. Don’t worry about me, though.”

“Mmmm.” Ahiru glanced down. It didn’t feel _that_ warm yet, but then again, his clothes _were_ heavier than her thin dresses. She also had to consider the emotional impact of that ceremony, and really shouldn’t pry. “Okay… I’ll try not to.”

She kept a surreptitious eye on him, though, and couldn’t help but notice that he seemed no less unhappy and uncomfortable all through their business at the market, and never really relaxed. When they got home he went straight to his room to change, while Ahiru and Edel took their purchases at market to the kitchen.

They’d just finished storing everything and had started in on lunch when Fakir walked into the kitchen. Ahiru looked over from chopping herbs to see him – he’d changed into lighter clothes, but still looked washed-out. She frowned. “Fakir? Are you going out?”

“Yeah.” He didn’t meet her eyes. “I know Charon said I could take the day off, but I’d rather go do some work than just lie about here or – well, that’s where I’ll be.” He took a deep breath and let it out. “I’ll be back before dinner, as usual.”

“But what about lunch?” Edel raised an eyebrow. “Are you leaving now? That’s not –”

“I’m not hungry just yet.” Fakir shook his head. “Besides, I’m sure I can get something to eat over there, so – well, I’ll see you later.” Without waiting for either of them to respond, he headed back out of the kitchen.

“Oh my…” Edel murmured in his wake. “What could have gotten into him _now?_ ”

 “I don’t know.” Ahiru’s stomach churned as she stared at the door. “I hope he’s okay…”

“I’m sure he is. Knowing him, it’s probably just one of his moods.” Edel shrugged and went back to stirring the broth she had simmering on the stove. “There are worse things he could be doing than a bit of extra work, so I’m not going to fret about it.”

“Yeah, I guess, it’s just…” Ahiru frowned down at her herbs before resuming chopping. “We – we’d talked last night about maybe going for a ride or a walk when we got back, cause you said I could have the day off too… he must have forgotten…”

“Oh, Ahiru, I’m sorry.” Edel sighed. “He can be forgetful sometimes if something is bothering him, I do know that much… I’m sure he didn’t mean to do that to you.”

“It – it’s okay.” Ahiru set the herbs aside and started peeling a potato. “It – it wasn’t even for sure, we just said maybe, so maybe he thought we didn’t have any plans and technically we didn’t, so he was free to do what he wanted… I guess I just hoped…” She swallowed. “Oh well, we can just do it another time, I guess.” She turned to look at Edel, her hands stilling. “So – so since I’m not doing anything, maybe I could help you make something, if you need me to?”

“That’s very kind of you, Ahiru, but I hadn’t planned on doing any brewing or preserving today.” Edel shook her head. “I have a few deliveries to make, and then I’m going to have dinner with Ebine, so I won’t be home until late this evening. You’ll have the house to yourself, so do whatever you want to, all right?”

“Oh.” Ahiru’s shoulders slumped slightly. “Okay… maybe I’ll do some stuff in the basement, then…”

“Well, you could, but…” Edel tasted the broth, and then added some more spices and salt to it. “I’d really rather you took this as a true day off. You worked this morning, so take some time to relax. And besides, it might be a bit stifling down there anyway on a day like today. Go for that walk in the woods, or sit under a tree reading – take it easy on yourself. Summer will be over soon enough, so enjoy the opportunity to be out of doors while you can.”

“That’s true.” Ahiru set down the potato, and started peeling another one. “And I really wanted to walk through the woods today, so… so I should just go on my own, with or without Fakir.” Her expression became pouty. “I don’t need him to go with me…”

“Very true.” Edel laughed. “I’m glad you’ve taken that attitude. Yes, it’s disappointing to have that happen to you, but there’s no reason to deprive yourself of a good time just because he forgot to engage his brain this morning. I find it’s often a good idea to at least try to make the most of things after a disappointment, even if that just means a long bath and a good book later on in the evening.”

“Y-yeah, me too.” Ahiru nodded. “It can be really hard, though… sometimes I still just feel so sad and it won’t go away.”

“And that’s all right too.” Edel took the peeled potatoes from Ahiru and began to chop them up. “Just let the feelings run their course and get yourself through the rest of the day however you can. Sometimes that’s the only thing you can do.”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru moved away so that she could wash her hands. “I think… being sad and disappointed and everything, they’re not fun, but they’re still important feelings to have and we shouldn’t try to not have them. All feelings are important.”

“Very true.” Edel dropped the potatoes into the broth. “Very true, indeed.”

After lunch Ahiru helped Edel not only with cleaning up, but also the packing of the various medicines and products that she was delivering to her customers. She walked Edel to the door and bid her farewell, assuring her that she’d be fine on her own and wishing her a good time with Ebine, and then locked the door and headed to the back of the house. She hovered at her bedroom door for a few minutes, not sure of what she should do; while Edel’s idea of taking a book outside to read in the shade of one of the large trees was tempting, so too was taking that walk in the woods. Fakir clearly wasn’t going to go with her, and she found herself veering between slightly hurt disappointment at his complete lack of acknowledgment of their conversation the previous night, and deep concern over what could have caused it to slip his mind. It wasn’t at all like him to do that, he was normally so ready to spend time with her and frequently initiated plans himself. But something or someone had shaken him up today, enough to make him forget their possible plan, and that worried her.

Ahiru finally decided, after several minutes of indecision, to go ahead and take the walk through the forest on her own. She knew the area well enough by now to be able to stay in a certain section and not get lost, and be able to head back home easily. She took her keys with her, locking the back door, and started towards the edge of the woods. Clouds still crowded the sky, so the air felt humid and damp, but it wasn’t nearly as warm as she’d thought it would get by now, and so things were pretty bearable. The occasional breeze came along to refresh her, and under the trees everything felt cooler. Ahiru headed towards a little stream she knew lay not too far away, following the sound of it babbling and her sense for direction that had developed over several months of living right near the woods and having to venture into them fairly frequently for her work.

No – not just several months, she corrected herself. Nearly a _year_. Ahiru silently marveled at how fast time had passed. She’d moved here at the beginning of September last year, and now it was August already. Where had all those months gone? They’d flown by as if carried on the wings of birds. So much had happened: she’d learned a lot about witchcraft, she’d made friends, settled into a new home, Lilie had gotten married, she’d attended some special celebrations for the first time, and even fallen in love. It somehow seemed unreal that it was already almost a year since moving into Goldkrone. It was all she could think about as she took off her shoes and sat down beside the stream, plunging her now bare feet into it. “Ah…” Ahiru sighed and closed her eyes, enjoying the feeling of the cool water flowing gently over her toes, which she couldn’t resist wiggling them a little.

Gradually, however, something began to intrude upon her awareness; and it was with a sense of creeping dread that she slowly opened her eyes, as if afraid to see her surroundings again. At first glance nothing appeared to be out of place, but as she gazed around it seemed to her that she could sense herself being watched. The shadows of the trees looked longer and deeper, and for a fairly sunny day things suddenly felt darker than they should be. A strange cry from some distant bird made her jerk in surprise, and all around her the leaves and undergrowth rustled with a breeze she couldn’t feel. The air stilled, the sound of the water grew quieter, and for a fleeting moment she thought she saw eyes peering at her from between two trees. They’d vanished by the time she glanced over, but the feeling of being watched remained.

Never in all her visits to this place had Ahiru felt this – this _wrongness_. She’d learned enough about the forest, though, to know that staying wasn’t a sensible idea. She withdrew her feet from the stream, slipped her shoes back on with fingers that trembled, and then stood and began walking as swiftly as she could, back the way she’d come. The sense that there were eyes upon her persisted, and she somehow knew that turning and looking back would be a very bad idea. The bird from before let out several wails in quick succession, as if warning someone – or some _thing_ – that she was escaping. Soon enough her brisk pace had turned into a full-on run, and only when she finally emerged from the edge of the forest and saw the back of Edel’s house did she let herself collapse, her now jelly-like legs giving out. She stayed there for several minutes, trying to catch her breath and waiting for her heart to stop pounding. When she felt ready, she got up and staggered into the house, her sweaty, shaky fingers fumbling with the keys as she unlocked the door to let herself in.

Her first thought was to do nothing else but lie down on her bed and try to relax, and so she bypassed the kitchen despite feeling a dry spot in her throat and a need to soothe it with some water. But no sooner had she sagged onto her mattress then the doorbell rang, echoing through the empty house. A groan escaped her, and she remained where she was for half a minute before letting out another deep sigh and reluctantly getting up.

The doorbell rang again while she was still on her way there, and despite her exhaustion Ahiru quickened her pace. Once she got there, opening the door revealed a familiar face: Hermia. “Oh, hi, Hermia!” She brightened. “How are you? I haven’t seen you in a while, it feels like!”

“Yes, I… took some time off.” Hermia fidgeted slightly. “I was due for a holiday, and I really needed it… so I got to relax a little. But now I’m back on the job!” She smiled.

“Well, I’m glad you enjoyed your time off!” Ahiru watched as Hermia dug into her bag for whatever letters she had for them today, and a memory clicked into place for her. “Oh! Um… the last time I saw you, you forgot a letter here that was for Lysander, Cha – Mr. Schmidt’s apprentice.” She couldn’t remember if Hermia was on a first name basis with Charon or not, and if it would confuse her to hear him referred to as such. “I took it over there for you, so don’t worry about it.”

“O-oh, th-that… I…” Hermia’s eyes went wide and she blushed. “Th-that was… ah… well… it wasn’t really a mistake…”

“Huh?” Ahiru stared at her. “It – it wasn’t? How?”

“Well, the thing is, I…” Hermia cleared her throat. “I – I wrote that letter, you see… but I couldn’t bring myself to deliver it to him myself, so… so I kind of left it there on purpose with you.” She hung her head. “A-and I put it on the bottom, so that you wouldn’t notice before I left… I – I’m so sorry, Miss Ahiru, I shouldn’t use you to deliver my correspondence!” She buried her face in her hands.

“No, no, it’s okay!” Ahiru waved her hands back and forth. “I – I don’t mind! Really! Especially cause… cause you work so hard delivering everyone else’s mail, and you deserve breaks, and it must be nerve-wracking to deliver letters you wrote yourself to people, I don’t know if I could do it… so I’m not mad, really!”

“You’re too kind.” Hermia sighed. “I know what you’re saying makes sense… I guess… but… but it was so dishonest of me.” She made a little groaning sound. “I really should have just asked you, but I didn’t have the nerve.”

“It’s okay! Really!” Ahiru nodded. “Did – did everything go okay in the end? You don’t have to tell me anything, but I hope nothing bad happened from sending the letter…”

“Oh no… not at all…” Hermia lowered her hands, revealing that she was blushing and grinning. “You see, it… it was a love letter, and he…” She giggled. “He – he feels the same way! So now we’re… we’re… we’re together! Oh, Ahiru, I’m so happy!”

“Oh! How wonderful!” Ahiru gaped, and then beamed at her. “I’m so happy for you too!” She clapped her hands. “That’s so amazing!”

“Yes, and I owe so much to you.” Hermia’s eyes shone, as if with happy tears. “Thank you, Ahiru… thank you so much! You helped me without knowing how much, just out of the goodness of your heart, and now I’m happier than I’ve ever been. Thank you!”

“Awww, I’m so glad I could help!” Ahiru all but bounced in place. “You deserve to be happy, Hermia!”

“Thank you.” She dashed at her eyes with the back of her hand, and then seemed to remember what she’d come to do. “Oh… I’m sorry, here’s your mail… most of it’s for Edel, but there are a couple for you too.” She held out a stack of letters.

“That’s okay, I liked finding out your good news!” Ahiru took the mail from her. “Thank you!”

“Of course.” Hermia adjusted her bag. “I’ve got to go now, there’s more to deliver, but you take care and have a good day, all right? Thank you again for everything!”

“You’re welcome, and you too, I hope your day is good too!” Ahiru waved at Hermia as she headed back up the path. “Bye!”

She shut the door once Hermia disappeared, and looked down at the letters in her hand. She sorted it into her mail and Edel’s, and took hers to her room before heading to the kitchen. She left Edel’s letters on the kitchen table while she poured herself a glass of water, and heated some more to lukewarm. When it had reached the proper temperature she used it to have a bath, cleaning off the sweat from her frantic run through the woods and rinsing her hair with some floral water as well. Once she was dry and changed into clean nightclothes and a light robe, Ahiru curled up on her bed with a book and took it easy until her stomach started to growl at her again.

A few minutes after she got back to the kitchen she heard the front door open, and footsteps coming down the hall. She looked up from where she was setting out a dinner spread as Fakir entered. “Hi, Fakir.”

“Hey.” A slight frown appeared on his face. “You’re alone? Is Edel all right?”

“What? Oh… no, she’s okay.” Ahiru frowned back at him. “She’s eating dinner with Ebine tonight and won’t be back till later. Why? Did you want to talk to her?”

“No.” He shook his head. “Well, I mean… not that I hate her company, just… no, there’s nothing in particular I wanted to talk to her about, if that’s what you’re asking.” He shrugged, and Ahiru noticed that his complexion looked more normal now.

“Yeah, that’s what I was wondering.” Ahiru nodded. “You – you don’t mind that it’s just me here?”

“Why would I mind that?” Fakir picked up the pitcher and poured himself some lemonade. “Sorry… I didn’t mean to make you think that I objected to your company or anything like that. I was just worried for a moment that she’d gotten sick or something.”

“Oh! Okay.” Ahiru let her breath out. “Th-that’s good…”

Fakir frowned again. “Ahiru? Did… did I do something to make you think that I’d be unhappy at having dinner with just us?”

“Well… no… not really… I mean… a little…” She sat down and averted her eyes from his. “You… you kind of forgot that we were going to maybe go for a walk or a ride or something today…”

“… Oh.” Fakir’s shoulders sagged. “Shit, I… damn, I knew I was…” He sighed. “I’m sorry. It… completely flew out of my mind, I just…”

“You were upset about something, right?” Ahiru supplied. “Edel said you can be kind of forgetful if something is bothering you.”

“… A bit, yeah,” Fakir admitted. “But that’s no excuse for just… ugh.” He scowled. “God, you just… you deserve a better friend. I’m sorry.”

“Fakir, no…” Ahiru’s face fell. “Please don’t say that… everybody makes mistakes, you know? And I’m not mad at you, just… well, most of all I hope that whatever was bothering you is okay now, that _you’re_ okay…”

“I’m… well, I think the work helped. A little.” Fakir let his breath out. “I don’t know if I would’ve been able to take the walk or ride anyway, for whatever that’s worth… but I’m sorry, I really am.”

“It’s okay.” Ahiru pressed her lips. “I – I’m sorry that you’re still upset… do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really.” He sighed. “I’m sorry, just… I can’t.” He shook his head. “Tell me about what you did.”

“Well, I went for a walk on my own, since you weren’t here.” Ahiru took a piece of bread and started making a sandwich. “And it was really nice at first, I went to that one stream and I took off my shoes and I stuck my feet in and it felt really good.”

“At first?” Fakir frowned. “Did something happen? Are you all right?”

“Y-yeah, I’m all right, it was just… kind of…” Ahiru stared down at her sandwich. “I was sitting there, and I had my eyes closed cause it felt so nice to have my toes in the water and then I felt this… it felt weird, and strange, a-and _wrong_ all of a sudden. I felt like I was being watched, and it got really quiet except for this creepy bird I couldn’t see, and I thought I saw eyes between the trees, so I put my shoes on and I hurried home and it was really scary…” She risked a glance up at him. “Do – do you think I was just being silly?”

“… No.” He looked like he’d lost a little color again. “I don’t. That’s… strange things can happen in the woods, even on our side of the border, and…” He shook his head. “You were right to hurry back. Never stay in the forest if you sense something wrong – just run straight home as fast as you can.”

“I know. Don’t worry.” Ahiru served herself some extra greens. “But I thought the fairies couldn’t harm anyone on our side of the border… right? So it shouldn’t be dangerous.”

“They’re prohibited while the treaty holds, yes.” Fakir’s eyes grew distant. “But it’s impossible to know if they’ll ever become tired of it, or angry for some reason, and equally impossible to know when such a thing has happened… not to mention that they don’t bother to control all the creatures that are permitted to wander freely through both worlds. So just to be safe, it’s best not to stay where things don’t feel right.”

“Oh, that makes sense.” Ahiru waited to speak again until she’d eaten some of her sandwich. “I don’t think I want to go back in the forest alone anymore… I’ll stick to only going with you or Edel.” She shuddered. “That was really creepy.”

Fakir nodded. “I don’t blame you.”

The conversation moved to other things after that, and they worked together to clean up once they’d finished eating. They then moved to the library, where they spent a good portion of the evening reading and talking. Edel came home fairly late, just as Ahiru was beginning to feel ready to go to sleep after her long and rather exciting day. She stayed up long enough to fix Edel a cup of soothing tisane, however, before retreating to her bedroom and bidding Fakir goodnight as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Friedhold: Means "peaceful ruler", derived from the Germanic elements _frid_ "peace" and _wald_ "rule".


	26. Chapter 26

Ahiru shivered and wrapped her coat a little tighter around herself as the cart rattled up the road. Above her, wispy white clouds drifted lazily through a pale blue sky, propelled by the brisk wind that bit at her exposed skin and ruffled her hair. She couldn’t help but sadly lament that fact even as she tried to keep herself warm, for she’d worked so hard to tuck all her hair into place and now it was sure to be ruined and she’d arrive looking a mess. And yet Edel, seated in the back, seemed not to have one single spot on her elaborate coiffure where the wind had spoiled her efforts. Of course, her hair was generally more manageable and even eerily good at staying in place no matter what she did with it, but it still seemed somehow unfair. Ahiru envied her.

It was September seventh, and they were on their way to Raetsel’s house to attend her wedding.  As a friend of her parents Charon had been invited too, and had fully intended to go, but had caught a nasty cold yesterday and so was staying home today to rest and take care of himself. Edel had brought over some medicine and supplies that she’d delivered while Fakir hitched Asim up to the cart; she now rode alone in the back, along with the wedding gifts, while Ahiru sat up front next to Fakir, as she had when they’d all gone to the solstice festival.

It felt good to have the new month finally here, and the change in weather that went with it. August had seemed to drag on far too long, and time passed so lazily that it had often felt like it was somehow twice its actual length. But as it ended at last it brought with it some relief from the miserable heat wave and the accompanying humidity that had made everything so much more unbearable. And now today felt like the first truly cool day in months, heralding the true beginning of autumn.

She shivered again, and it must have caught Fakir’s eye, for he glanced over at her. “Hey. You all right?”

“What? Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “Just a little cold, I guess… it’s so windy…”

“Yeah.” Fakir tugged on the reins a little. “The season change is always like this. It comes on so suddenly that you aren’t prepared for it no matter how much you wanted the relief from the heat.”

“True.” Ahiru tried not to yawn; she hadn’t really slept well last night. “I’m just glad it’s not hot anymore, though.”

“… Yeah.”

She risked a glance at him as he drove, but couldn’t tell what he was thinking; she restrained a sigh. During one of her few periods of actual sleep last night she'd had yet another dream about him. Not an erotic dream, but a rather romantic one. They’d been lying under the covers in bed, yes, but they’d had sleep clothes on and hadn’t done anything besides kiss and hold each other close. He’d stroked her hair too, and told her more than once that he loved her, and she’d fallen asleep snuggled up in his arms. It had been so vivid and felt so real, that when she’d woken up she’d been disoriented almost to the point of panic upon finding herself alone. But then reality had sunk in.

Those sorts of dreams were, in her opinion, much worse than the erotic ones. The latter left her hot and bothered, yes, but the sweet ones made her wake up with an aching heart and a strong urge to cry over what she could never have. For the things they did in those dreams were what she truly wanted most of all: words of love, romance, being held and tenderly cared for, all of the things that couples did. She wanted so badly to be able to be like they were now, doing things together like riding and going places and reading and sharing meals, but with the ability to be open about her feelings for him. She wanted to be able to walk hand in hand whenever they felt like it, she wanted him to smile at her and tell her he loved her, to not have to hide anything anymore. She wanted so much, but would never have any of it. And so she _had_ cried last night, muffling it in her pillow, and then laid awake in a depressed state, unable to get back to sleep for more than an hour, until it was finally time to get up and get ready.

 She didn’t want to think about that right now, though, so Ahiru tried to push it out of her mind and concentrate on the scenery around them as they rode towards Raetsel’s house. She lived on the eastern outskirts of Goldkrone, amidst a few other farms. Ahiru recalled Raetsel telling her about what livestock they kept there: mostly chickens, but also a few pigs, some geese, a goat or two, and several cats to keep the barn free of mice and rats. Their farm wasn’t quite as big as some of their neighbors, but it was large and prosperous enough to hire some hands to work the few fields they had, as well as help care for the animals. Raetsel worked with the animals as well to some degree, but mostly concentrated on her bees and the products she made from their honey and wax. Hans, she said, would start pitching in as well on the weekends now that this would be his home as well.

When they pulled up to the house they were directed to where all the other carts and wagons had been hitched, and Fakir gave Asim a small snack before they headed inside. Raetsel’s house was a tall, two-story building of stone and wood that looked like it had been added on to and renovated over the decades of its use. Raetsel had told her also that her family had maintained the farm over many generations, even dating back to before the treaty with the Fair Folk, and that she felt honored to carry on with it now that she was marrying and taking over her childhood home. She and Hans would keep up the farmstead just as previous generations of her family had, and raise children who would in turn take up that legacy after they were gone. It was something that clearly gave her a lot of pride, and it had also been easy to see how happy she was to be marrying Hans. It was good to see her so full of joy after all the anguish she’d been in when she’d consulted Edel that day back in March.

Raetsel’s parents greeted them at the door, and the cousins who’d been assigned gift duty took the presents from them and carried them upstairs to the spare room where all the rest were being stored. Someone else – related how, Ahiru wasn’t sure, for in all the noise and confusion she didn’t quite catch what they said – then showed them outside, where a consecrated circle had been made and chairs from various sources set around it. All in all, though, the number of guests wasn’t nearly what it had been at the two other weddings Ahiru had attended in the past year, and once someone with knowledge of the seating arrangements Raetsel and Hans had worked out showed up it was no trouble at all to find where they were meant to be. Ahiru ended up sitting with Fakir to her left and Edel to her right, with a pretty good view of the circle. Though that would no doubt change once taller people sat down in front of her.

Her prediction came half true. A slight young woman not much taller than herself had been assigned the seat directly in front of her, which wouldn’t have been so bad if not for the rather massive hat she wore, laden with lace and silk flowers on the brim. Ahiru sighed and resigned herself to trying to see around it. The thought occurred to her, as it had at the naming ceremony, that if she could sit on Fakir’s lap it would be a different story, but like before she doubted very much that he’d be open to such a thing, especially in public.

Once everyone had been seated, they didn’t have to wait too long for the proceedings to truly begin. The priestess took her place in the circle, and Raetsel and Hans made their way towards it from opposite ends. Hans had on a plain but obviously well-made suit, while Raetsel wore a gown in a lovely shade of lilac, embellished with just the right amount of delicate lace, and a sheer, gauzy veil in the same hue had been attached to her crown of wildflowers to drape over her loose brown hair. She looked radiant and quietly happy, and her joy could be heard brimming over in her voice as she spoke her vows with Hans. They promised to love and support each other through all of their years, to be true and honest and kind and always treat each other with respect. When they’d finished they shared a chaste kiss, and then their gathered family and friends let out cheers and shouts of congratulation. Raetsel spoke first once the din had died down, thanking them for their well-wishes, and announcing that the wedding meal would be served inside the house and to follow her and Hans.

A veritable feast awaited them in the large dining room: an enormous smoked ham that had been coated in a honey glaze, roast chicken and goose, various egg dishes, a richly spiced stew, and a bevy of vegetable dishes, along with some freshly baked bread. Ahiru, not a fan of either poultry or eggs, opted for the ham and some stew, along with noodles, bread, and some roasted potatoes and beets. Cider made from the first harvest of apples from the family’s modestly sized orchard and spiced with cinnamon accompanied the meal, and tasted so good that Ahiru wished she could take a jug home with her.

Cake came after that, and once Raetsel and Hans had served each other their first bites of it, slices were doled out to everyone else. It was a beautiful, honey-scented apple cake redolent with spices and layered with a rich cream cheese filling studded with candied almond slices; Ahiru gobbled it all down despite feeling on the verge of fullness, and longed to take some home. Alas, she had seen the very last slice given away to someone else, and so she resigned herself to only dreaming of having more, and maybe getting the recipe from Raetsel sometime if she knew it. All in all, the entire meal had tasted much more homey and comforting than the fancy food at Lilie’s wedding, and she had to revel in the contrast. She felt much more relaxed in this environment as well, able to converse easily even with the people she didn’t know, for she didn’t feel judged or looked down on at all.

“And now,” Raetsel said as they finished eating dessert, “Please follow me to… well, I suppose calling it a ballroom would suggest something more pompously grandiose than what we actually have, wouldn’t it?” She laughed, and several people laughed with her, including her parents. “It serves the same basic function, though, and we’ve hired a few musicians to serenade us, so please, join us there for a bit of dancing and celebration.”

She took Hans’ hand, and together they led the procession to the aforementioned room. It wasn’t tiny by any means, Ahiru noticed, but then, she’d been inside bigger ballrooms in the city so she supposed she had to concede Raetsel’s point. Chairs had been set up along the walls, and at the far end the musicians who’d been hired were almost done setting up. She and Fakir managed to find themselves two vacant chairs beside one another, and sat down to watch everyone else take to the dance floor.

Raetsel and Hans danced first while everyone stood back and watched, and then several others joined them as they switched to other partners. Raetsel danced with her father, while Hans danced with his mother, and they went through a couple more partner changes before returning to one another. Ahiru couldn’t help but smile, for as they turned slowly around the floor she could see by their expressions that the whole world seemed, for them, to be confined to just the two of them. How wonderful, that things had worked out so well for them both.

After they’d been watching for a while Fakir spoke up, sounding hesitant. “Ahiru? Did… do you want…”

“Fakir?” Ahiru turned to look at him, and saw that he was blushing. “What is it?”

“I… well, I was wondering…” He swallowed. “Do you… want to dance? You… seemed to enjoy it so much at the festival, so I thought… I didn’t think you’d want to have to sit everything out…”

“Oh!” Ahiru’s eyes went wide. “I – I… um… I m-mean, y-yes, I’d definitely like to!” She nodded. “But – but just one, and a slow one, cause I feel really full and kind of tired and I don’t know if it’s a good idea to do a lot of dancing when I feel like this…”

“All right.” Fakir nodded too, and she thought she saw disappointment flash in his eyes, for just the briefest of moments, before disappearing like it had never been there. And in fact, it probably hadn’t been – why would he be disappointed at only dancing with her once, after all? It was surprising enough that he’d asked in the first place. Did he feel sorry for her? “We’ll wait for another slow song.”

“Okay.” Ahiru tried to push away the disquieting thought that he felt sorry for her – really, she knew that he meant what he’d said and genuinely did just want to do it so she’d have a good time – and smiled. “Sounds good!”

They only had to wait a few minutes more for a slower song to be played, and when it started up Fakir took her hand in his and led her to the dance floor. This time around she knew where to put her hands, and she leaned her head against him as they moved around, careful not to let her feet tread on his. Her eyes burned slightly and a lump rose in her throat at how it felt to be held like this, especially after her dream last night, and she fought as hard as she could to blink away the tears and swallow down the painful lump before the music changed.

The musicians switched to another soft, slow song, however, and without even really realizing Ahiru and Fakir kept dancing to it without a pause. Only when the music picked up its tempo dramatically did they pull apart, and they held each other’s gazes for a split second before making their way back to a pair of empty seats.

“… I’m sorry,” Fakir said a minute or two after they’d sat down.

“Huh?” Ahiru turned to look at him. “For what?”

“That…” He gestured to the dance floor. “I just realized… you only wanted to have one dance, but we ended up having two. Sorry.”

“Oh, don’t be silly!” Ahiru giggled. “I feel fine, and I didn’t mind! I barely realized it either, if it makes you feel any better, but if I had and I really hadn’t wanted to dance again I would’ve said something. So don’t worry, okay?”

“… All right.” He seemed to relax a little. “As long as you’re feeling all right, that’s the most important thing – I don’t want you to be sick.”

“I’m not.” Ahiru shook her head. “Don’t worry.”

Fakir smiled, and her heart fluttered. “Good.”

They sat quietly together for some time, just watching other people dance, until Raetsel hurried up and seized Ahiru’s hands. “Ahiru! Do come outside with me and the other girls, won’t you?”

“What?” Ahiru blinked. “Wh-why?”

“Because I’m going to toss the bouquet, of course!” Raetsel grinned. “And as you’re one of the unmarried girls attending my wedding, I insist you give yourself the chance to obtain a lucky token to help with getting a marriage of your own.” She winked.

“M-me?” Ahiru’s eyes widened. “B-but I – I – I mean…”

“Go on,” Fakir interjected. “What harm can it do? At worst it’s just a silly superstition, right?”

“Exactly.” Raetsel’s eyes gleamed. “Although I do think it helps, if only through giving a girl the courage to be more forthcoming with the person of her affections.” She tugged Ahiru up from her chair. “And I won’t let you demur, because you certainly deserve such happiness. Come on!”

“But…” Ahiru’s voice trailed off and she sighed, her protests lost by the wayside as Raetsel pulled her along towards the back of the house, where the marriage ceremony had taken place. No one had bothered to take anything down yet, she noticed, but that was no surprise – there were no servants being employed, all the farmhands having been given the day off, with various family and friends volunteering to do the work that needed to be done.

Raetsel only let go of her hand when they got there, and Ahiru took several steps back. A handful of other young women milled around, most of them closer to Raetsel’s age. A couple of them chattered excitedly to each other, but quieted when Raetsel finally decided where to stand. “Are you ready, girls?” she called out.

“Yes!” went up the chorus from all of them, save Ahiru. A few giggles accompanied the statement.

“Good! Then without further ado, I’ll launch this into the air – may the luckiest lady catch it, and good fortune go with it!” Raetsel grinned, and then turned her back on them. Everyone seemed to be holding their breath as she waited for another second or two, and then tossed the bouquet over her shoulder, high into the air.

It sailed over the heads of the other women, who all squealed and shouted and clustered together where they thought it would land. Some of them even got knocked down to the ground as they struggled to stay separate, and Ahiru had just enough time to feel sorry for their mishap before the bouquet of flowers landed on her folded arms. She reacted on instinct, catching it before it could fall to the ground, and only then realized what she’d done. “O-oh…”

“Congratulations!” Raetsel had turned back around to see who’d been lucky enough to catch it, and smiled as she saw Ahiru holding the bouquet. “Let’s hear it for Ahiru!”

The other women chimed in their agreement and clapped heartily for her, making Ahiru blush. “B-but I… I…” She gave up and let herself trail off as they all came round to offer more personal congratulations and well wishes, none of them looking upset that they hadn’t been the ones to snag it. She followed everyone back into the house, where she could see that the party was starting to break up, and hovered in the hallway, wondering if she should go back to the dancing room or if she should try and locate Fakir and Edel.

Fakir found her first, however, and his eyes went immediately to the little bouquet of wildflowers clutched in her hands. “Oh… you caught it? Good work.”

“Th-thanks, but… I really didn’t do anything.” Ahiru shook her head, feeling her face warm up. “It just kind of landed on me by chance and it started to fall so I reacted before I knew it and then everyone was congratulating me.” She ducked her head. “It – it was kind of embarrassing…”

“You don’t have to believe in the superstition if you don’t want to,” Fakir said gently. “You can just put it in some water when we get home and treat it as a… souvenir or something.”

“Y-yeah, that’s true!” Ahiru brightened. “But, um, anyway… I guess it’s time to go home? Have you seen Edel?”

“Yeah, she’s waiting in the front hall.” Fakir nodded. “She sent me to get you, since I’d seen where you were last headed.”

“Oh, okay.” Ahiru brushed some loose hair out of her eyes. “Let’s go, then.”

They headed back to the front hall, where Edel was waiting, and got their coats. Somehow in all the jumble and confusion of multiple people getting their things and saying goodbye to everyone else Raetsel managed to find them before they could seek her out, and embraced all three. “Thank you all so much for coming,” she said just before she released them. “I’m so happy you could be here to share this day with us.”

“My pleasure.” Edel smiled. “I know you’ve been waiting for this day for some time, and I’m glad I could be here to witness your happiness when it finally arrived.”

“Oh, no kidding!” Raetsel rolled her eyes and laughed. “So many delays and complications… we should’ve been able to do this _months_ ago! But better late than never, and I’ll always be grateful for so much.” She gave Edel a knowing look. “Much more than I can ever say.”

“I – I’m just so glad you’re happy.” Ahiru beamed up at her. “It was really nice to be here, and you have such a beautiful home, and the meal was really yummy, and just… yeah, I’m just so happy for you and Hans.”

“Thank you, Ahiru.” Raetsel smiled. “And you too, Fakir, don’t feel forgotten!” She gave him another quick hug. “Thank you for coming even though you hate parties.” She laughed.

“Of course.” Fakir smiled. “I wouldn’t have missed it for anything.”

“I know. And that means a lot to me, it truly does.” Raetsel smiled back. “Give my regards to Charon when you see him next, all right? I’m sorry he wasn’t able to make it, but I hope he’s taking good care of his own health.”

“I will.” Fakir nodded. “And don’t worry, he knows to take it easy.”

“Good.” She laughed again. “Stubborn men can be the worst to deal with, after all… but that’s beside the point.” She let her gaze travel over them again, full of warmth. “I’ll see you three when I see you, then – Hans and I are going away for a few days tomorrow, and then it’ll be back to life as normal. Our new normal, anyway.” She smiled. “Goodbye, and thank you again for being here!”

Ahiru held tightly to the bouquet all the way home, Fakir’s words about disregarding the superstition around it and treating it like a souvenir echoing in her mind. According to popular belief, the one who caught it would be the next one of those competing to get married. Maybe it was true, maybe it wasn’t; she tended to lean towards the latter. Of course, she had no idea how often it worked or didn’t work, but she could feel a dull certainty in the pit of her stomach that it was definitely not going to work for her. Lucky or not, it couldn’t bring the one she loved to her if he didn’t already have feelings for her, and chances were good that at least some of the other women who’d vied for the flowers already had people in their lives that they could conceivably wed. No, this was another out of bounds dream for her. Maybe if she got over him and found someone else she loved she could someday get married, but that was someday, not close enough to give credence to the superstition. It didn’t _feel_ like she was going to ever get over Fakir right now, in all honesty, but in all fairness she had to concede that she very much lived in the present and couldn’t truly predict her future. Or at least not like that. That she didn’t _want_ to get over him and longed to instead have her feelings reciprocated was beside the point.

When they got to Charon’s they put the cart back where it belonged and Fakir tended to Asim before the three of them went to the front door to check on Charon. He sent them away, saying he didn’t need anything, but not before Edel could relay Raetsel’s message. After they bid him goodnight they headed down the path towards home.

They ate a light dinner of sorts together, and then all retired to their own rooms. Ahiru chose to indulge in a hot bath, the first she’d felt like taking in what seemed like forever. Tonight was the first truly cool night of autumn, and she relished the sound of the wind through the trees as she brushed and braided her hair afterwards. She’d opened her window just a little, and the songs of night birds brought a smile to her face. She’d put the flowers in an empty jar that she then filled with water and set on her table, and she let her gaze stray to them as she tied the end of her braid. Her smile faded slightly, remembering her melancholy thoughts on the ride home, but she pushed those out of her mind and chose to focus on how pretty the flowers were before lying down with a book. She’d gotten all of her weekly reading for Mr. Katz done in advance of the wedding, so this was a novel being read purely for pleasure. Ahiru read until her eyes started to fall, and then marked her place and set the book aside before closing her window and turning off the light. She burrowed under the covers and fell asleep soon after her eyes closed.

She slept without dreaming for a few peaceful hours before waking with a start. Disoriented, she glanced around the darkened room, wondering what could have woken her so suddenly. She searched her memory, but couldn’t recall any sort of dream, and pulling her curtains open to let in some moonlight revealed nothing out of place, no fallen objects whose plunge to the floor or onto their sides on a hard surface could’ve made a noise loud enough to stir her from her sleep. Ahiru sat there for a moment, yawning, but finally shrugged and decided that it had somehow been a random event, nothing to worry about. She put her curtains back into place, and then lay back down.

Before a minute had passed, however, a noise from the next room caught her ear. Ahiru’s eyes flew open again, and she sat back up and strained to listen. What _was_ that? She held her breath and waited, and only when she heard it again did she let her breath out. She hadn’t imagined it, that was for sure – but where was it coming from? She waited again in tense silence, listening as hard as she could with the utmost concentration, and when she heard it once more, she knew: it was coming not from outside, but from the room next door. Fakir’s room.

Carefully, slowly, Ahiru slid off her bed, not wanting even the slightest squeak of the mattress give away that she was awake. She put her slippers on and tiptoed over to the wall between their rooms, and with a racing heart and guilty conscience pressed her ear to said wall and listened again. She consoled herself with the rationalization that if he was feeling sick it was her duty to make sure he was all right; she only hoped he wasn’t touching himself in the middle of the night, purely because that would be a horrible invasion of his privacy.

A few minutes of eavesdropping killed that notion, however. It soon became clear that he wasn’t sick, wasn’t pleasuring himself, but was actually – well, she wasn’t _entirely_ sure, but it sounded an awful lot like Fakir was crying. Ahiru’s heart twisted, and she clasped her hand to her mouth. She lingered in her spot at the wall for only a minute or so more, before hastening to her door and opening it as quietly as she could. A few more steps took her to Fakir’s door, and she hesitantly knocked. “F-Fakir?”

“Ahiru?” As she’d feared, he sounded stuffed up, as if he’d caught a cold too. Her heart sank. “What is it?”

“I – I um…” She wrung her hands. “I – I woke up, and I heard noises from your room… a-are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” He cleared his throat, and she thought she heard him sniff. “Go back to bed.”

“Are you sure?” Her hand hovered over the knob. “You – you sounded like you were… like you were upset…”

“I’m _fine_ ,” he repeated, his voice sounding less strained. “Whatever you heard, it wasn’t me. It must have been the wind, or some weird bird. There’s all kinds of bizarre things in the woods.”

“I… yeah, I guess.” Ahiru frowned. “Okay, then… well… goodnight…”

“Goodnight, Ahiru.”

She stood there for a moment, staring at his door in the dark, and then walked back to her own room. She didn’t go back to sleep at first for a while, though; she couldn’t. The noises were still coming from his room, only this time they sounded fainter, like he was trying harder to muffle them. After a while they ceased completely, but Ahiru still couldn’t get back to sleep. Her heart ached and her mind raced as she tried to figure out why he might be crying in the middle of the night. None of her answers set her at ease, though, and she finally gave up and decided to try to resume sleeping. It took her a while but she eventually drifted off, and didn’t wake up again until after the sun had risen.

When she got to the kitchen the next morning for breakfast, she found Fakir already there ahead of her. He sat in his usual spot, reading the newspaper while Edel boiled some grain for breakfast, and glanced up as the door opened. “Hey.” His gaze dropped back down to the paper.

“Hi… morning…” She studied his face for a moment, trying to read it, and then gave up and sat down in her usual spot across from him. “A-and morning, Edel… that smells really good.”

“Thank you.” Edel took a deep breath, inhaling the steam that rose gently from the cereal, and sighed. “It does at that, doesn’t it? It feels like it’s been ages since we had a nice hot breakfast.”

“Y-yeah, it really does!” Ahiru nodded. “It’s good to have the cooler weather again, I’m glad autumn’s finally here.”

“As am I.” Edel measured some spices into the grain and stirred them in. “I slept so much better last night. How about you?”

“U-um, y-yeah, I slept a lot better.” Ahiru risked a glance at Fakir, but his impassive expression as he read revealed nothing. And really, it wasn’t a _complete_ lie: she’d slept well before waking up and hearing him crying (or at least what she was pretty positive was the sound of him crying) and had had undisturbed slumber later too. It had just been that disturbance and the distress it caused her that resulted in a long stretch of wakefulness in between. “It was nice to not be tossing and turning cause it’s so warm.”

“Mmmm, yes.” Edel nodded. “And you? How did you sleep, Fakir?”

“Huh?” Fakir affected a blank expression as he looked up. “Oh – I slept fine. Sorry, I didn’t hear you at first.”

“That’s fine. I’m just glad you slept well too.” Edel kept stirring the cereal. “It seems as though this season is already being very good to all of us.”

“… Yeah.” Something in Fakir’s eyes flickered. “It does.”

They ate breakfast together with little conversation interspersed between bites, and then Fakir surprised them by standing up and announcing that he was off to Charon’s. His father had, he told them, said he could come by and get a little work done in the forge this morning, so he intended to do just that. There was no reason not to keep busy, after all, an assessment that Edel agreed with. And so he departed the house, and Edel and Ahiru followed soon after, bound for the marketplace to do some shopping.

Raetsel’s stall was in its usual spot, but someone else had taken it over while she was away on her honeymoon with Hans. A middle-aged woman selling jams, preserves, and various sauces sat there instead, and Edel paused to look over what she had to offer. They chatted for a bit, revealing that the woman knew Raetsel and that they’d agreed that she should have her stall for the week that Raetsel would be away. The woman running it now had a worse spot in the market, after all, and Raetsel felt that by taking over for a little while she’d do more business and motivate some new customers to seek out her usual place once she was back in it. Edel wound up buying a few different sauces from her, as well as a jar of jam, and then they moved on.

“We need some cheese and milk too,” Edel said as they walked along. “So we’ll go to Nan’s stall next, and then finish up by buying some flowers.”

“Okay!” Ahiru brightened at the thought of seeing Freya. She hadn’t talked to her in a few days, so it’d be good to stop by her stall and chat a bit with her.

Nan Geiszler spotted them as they walked up, and she beamed in their direction and waved. “Hello! Hello Edel, Ahiru!” She sprang up, her eyes shining. “How are you two, on this lovely autumn day?”

“We’re very good, thank you.” Edel smiled. “And you? You seem to be in a rather fine mood yourself, if I may say so.”

“You may, you may indeed.” Nan gave her a cheeky grin. “And with good reason! Would you like to hear it?”

“Certainly.” Edel nodded. “Do tell, for I do enjoy hearing of my friends’ happiness.”

“Then you will be most pleased with this tale.” Nan leaned forward conspiratorially. “Do you remember how I told you about that widowed bachelor I was sweet on?”

“Yes, I do.” Edel raised an eyebrow. “No, don’t tell me – he has started courting you?”

“Well, not quite,” Nan admitted. “But he _did_ visit my stall yesterday, and I dropped some hints, and I believe he dropped some in return, including one about a forthcoming dinner invitation.” She clasped her hands together, her eyes sparkling. “That sounds like the beginning of a courtship to come, doesn’t it? Oh, Edel, I am all aflutter with excitement and fear, I cannot decide how to feel!”

“What is the overriding feeling in your heart?” Edel asked. “To which are you more inclined – hope or fright?”

“I don’t know.” Nan pursed her lips. “It seems to vary from moment to moment, and I keep telling myself not to put too much hope into this, that I may have misconstrued his words… it may only be that he seeks a friendship, and not romantic companionship. But then, oh, I linger over words and looks in my mind, replaying everything, wanting to assure myself that I read him correctly… it is so difficult!” She sighed. “You seem to know so much about this, or at least that’s what Raetsel said – she told me that you once gave her excellent advice that helped her sort out a most desperate dilemma of the heart. What do _you_ think I should do?”

“Hmmm…” Edel considered it. “If I were in your place, I would make my best effort to remain hopeful, while also preparing myself to be let down. Of course, that is easier said than done, and nothing will completely prevent heartache if you are rejected. It’s a hard thing. I know,” she added. “You feel so unsure of yourself and of the very ground you stand on. Yet, if you hold yourself back and run away, you will never learn what might have been. Obviously I cannot speak for others, but my own preference is to suffer the pain of rejection any day, over the agony of never knowing if I would have been accepted. The former is far easier to get past, while the latter may haunt you all your life.”

“That’s true.” Nan tucked a stray curl behind her ear. “I’ve heard other people say that, so I think you’re definitely onto something there. No, I know you are,” she corrected herself. “You’re so wise, and, now I think about it… my own aunt never married, but she spent her life wondering if she could have, if only she had had the courage to speak out about her feelings to the one she loved. I remember how lonely she seemed at times, and if I am to be that lonely, well, I would prefer to do it not out of lack of trying for companionship, but out of repeated failures.” She smiled wryly. “Which I realize doesn’t sound any better, but to me there’s a distinction, and it’s in the lack of regrets you talked about.”

“No, I understand.” Edel nodded. “That makes perfect sense, and I agree wholeheartedly with your rationale.”

“That makes me feel better, to have someone as smart as you agree with me.” Nan laughed. “But enough talk about my romantic entanglements, or lack thereof – I suspect you came here for food, not gossip. Am I right?”

“Yes.” Edel laughed. “Not that I mind getting either, but you’re correct in what my intended purchases are.”

“Well, the gossip is free, so you received a bargain either way.” Nan winked. “Now then, why don’t you tell me what you’re looking for? I’ve got a few new things, too, so maybe we could discuss those as well…”

Ahiru wandered away while they talked about cheese and milk and butter. A couple stalls down from Nan’s, someone was selling various writing and art supplies, like pencil sets and hand-bound sketchbooks, and even some watercolor paints. She studied the products up for sale, considering them, and after a few minutes decided to take a closer look at one of the sketchbooks. As she reached for it, though, so did someone else, and she withdrew her hand quickly. “Oh! I – I’m sorry, you can…” Her voice trailed off and her eyes widened as she turned her head to see the person. “Oh! Malen!”

“Ahiru!” Malen’s eyes lit up behind her spectacles. “It’s good to see you again! How have you been?”

“I’m good! I’m really good!” Ahiru beamed. “A-and you? What happened with the portrait of the princess? I never did get to find out about that…”

“It – it’s an interesting story, actually.” Malen smiled shyly. “You see, I did not, in fact, get hired to paint Princess Rue’s portrait that day… but, she did like my work so much that she’s commissioned other pieces since then.”

“Oh! How wonderful!” Ahiru clapped her hands. “I’m so happy for you!”

“Thank you.” Malen blushed. “But – but it gets even better! She’s been so pleased with all the paintings I’ve done in the interim, that now I’ve been asked to do a family portrait of herself, Prince Siegfried, and little Friedhold.”

“Whaaaat?” Ahiru gaped at her. “Oh, Malen, that _is_ even better! I… wow, I’m just so happy for you, I – I don’t even know what to say cause I feel like anything I said would be redundant and silly, so just…” She flushed slightly. “U-um, anyway, congratulations!”

“Thank you, Ahiru.” Malen smiled. “And you know, it’s partly thanks to you – I seem to remember you encouraging me to be brave and submit my portfolio that day, instead of being scared and running away back home. If it hadn’t been for your words, I would have done just that and never found this success, so… thank you. Truly. For all that you did.”

“Oh no, no, I didn’t do that much.” Eyes wide again, Ahiru shook her head and waved her hands. “I – I just – I mean – I encouraged you, yes, but you had to make the final decision, and who knows, you might have found the bravery in yourself even without me… I don’t think I deserve any credit…”

“Then we’ll agree to disagree.” She laughed softly. “Because I remember how I felt that day, and how your words bolstered my courage in a way I could never have accomplished on my own. You did a great thing for me, Ahiru, and I’m sure that in your time here as a witch you’ve done great things for others too, and will continue to do so.”

“I – I, well… I – I try…” Ahiru could feel her face burning. “I work really hard and I try my best, that’s the best anyone can do, I think…”

“Well, I don’t know you well, but I bet your best is pretty good.” She smiled again. “I’d like to keep in touch more now that I mention that, though – is it okay if I start writing you letters? I know Miss Edel’s address, since my family’s bought medicine from her before.”

“Oh! Of course!” Ahiru nodded. “I – I’d really like that! Go ahead, and – and I’ll write you back right away!” Something caught her eye, and she turned her head for a second to see that Nan was packing things up for Edel, as the latter counted out money. “Oh no, I better go, Edel still has a few stops to make… sorry…”

“That’s all right.” Malen waved her hand. “I’ll write you a letter when I get home, and send it when I can, okay? And take care!”

“Y-you too! Thank you! And I’ll look forward to the letter!” Ahiru waved. “Bye!”

She practically bounced back to Edel, so happy was she over Malen’s good fortune, and waited while Edel loaded the purchases from Nan into both their baskets. “Next is Freya’s, and I’ve also remembered that I need to stop at the butcher’s,” Edel said as they walked away. “I’m sorry, I know you’d probably like to get home, but I really do need some ham, and a bit of beef for a roast wouldn’t hurt either.”

“No, no, don’t worry about that.” Ahiru shook her head. “I’m fine, I don’t mind, getting food is important, after all.”

“Very true.” Edel nodded. “All right, thank you for understanding.”

Ahiru told her that of course she did, and they kept going towards Freya’s stall. It was as laden with flowers as ever when they got there, though now that autumn had started there were a few seasonal blooms in amongst the more summery flowers she’d been selling for the past few months. Freya herself looked a little bored, but her expression brightened when she saw the two of them approaching, and she waved to Ahiru. “Hello! Good to see you Edel, Ahiru!”

“Hi, Freya!” Ahiru beamed at her. “How are you?”

“I’m doing well, thank you!” Freya pushed her glasses up her nose. “I just got over a summer cold, which was not so fun, but yesterday I was able to pick some flowers that have just started blooming for autumn.” She gestured to them. “A little bit early, given how long the heat lasted this year, but I’m not complaining.”

“Yeah, I wouldn’t either.” Ahiru shook her head. “I’m glad you’re feeling better, summer colds are the _worst_ …”

“Aren’t they, though?” Freya grimaced. “I don’t particularly enjoy them in other seasons, to be fair, but at least in autumn and winter and most of spring you can curl up under a blanket and drink hot tea, which is really all I want to do when I’m sick. Not so comfortable a prospect during a heat wave, though.”

“Ew, I know.” Ahiru made a face. “I’m so glad the weather’s cooled down now.”

“Me too.” Freya let out a deep sigh. “The temperature may spike again soon, it sometimes does that when we’ve had a particularly hot summer, but at least it’ll only be temporary if it does. Still, I hope it doesn’t.”

“Yeah, same here.” Ahiru nodded. “I don’t think I could take any more heat, I like it the way it is today…”

“You and me both.” She adjusted her glasses again and turned to Edel. “Now, are you here to buy any flowers? I’m sorry if we held you up, if so.”

“Not at all.” Edel shook her head. “I am here to buy flowers, yes, but I’m not in so much of a rush that I’d begrudge friends catching up.”

“Thank you, that’s very kind of you.” Freya smiled. “So, what is it you need today?”

That was Edel’s cue to produce a list of the flowers she wanted to buy, and she handed it to Freya to make things easier on her. Freya then gathered up all the flowers on the list in the correct quantities, and once she’d bundled them together and calculated the total Edel counted out the exact amount of money necessary. After a bit of consideration Edel decided that they should carry their purchases in Ahiru’s basket, along with the softer items they’d gotten from Nan, and the meat from the butcher’s would go into Edel’s alongside the jars they’d gotten earlier.

“It was really good to see you again, Freya,” Ahiru said brightly as they prepared to leave. “I – I’ll try to stop by again soon, and also… maybe we could start writing letters sometimes, if you’re not too busy?”

“Oh, I’d love that!” Freya smiled. “Don’t worry, I know your address already – I think everyone in town knows where Edel lives.” She glanced over in time to see Edel chuckle, and then looked back at Ahiru. “You take care, Ahiru, all right? And have a good day!”

“You too!” Ahiru waved at her. “Bye, Freya!”

Once Edel had bought the meat they needed at the butcher’s, it was time to take their purchases home. And none too soon, in Ahiru’s opinion – the wispy white clouds from yesterday had thickened and greyed, and were gathering in large clumps that seemed to suggest some rain was on the way. They’d worn their coats to go shopping, but not their cloaks, and she worried about being caught in a downpour, glancing anxiously up at the sky practically every other minute. They arrived home safe and dry, however, with not even a single drop of rain having fallen on them.

Fakir came out to meet them as they put their coats away, holding some envelopes in his hands. “Hey. Hermia came by while you were out, and brought mail for both of you.” He held them up.

“Oh, Fakir, you’re back!” Ahiru tilted her head. “You’re back earlier than I thought, is everything okay?”

“Yeah, no worries.” He shrugged. “Charon just wanted to rest and asked me to stop working so he could get some sleep, and since my hand was aching a little anyway I didn’t mind.”

“Oh no, I’m sorry your hand hurts…” Ahiru frowned. “Are – are you okay now? Have you done anything to make it feel better?”

“Not yet, but I will.” Fakir rubbed the back of his scarred hand. “I took some pain medicine, and after lunch I’ll soak it and put on some soothing balm. Don’t worry.”

“O-okay.” Ahiru stepped forward. “Anyway, you said Hermia brought by some mail?”

“Yeah.” He handed her a stack of three envelopes, and then gave six others to Edel. “Also told me to tell you she said hello, and that she’s doing well and hopes you are too.”

“Oh, how nice of her!” Ahiru brightened. “Thanks for telling me, Fakir!”

“It’s not a problem.” He shrugged again. “Do you two want any help with those baskets?”

“No, I rather think you should take it easy right now,” Edel replied. “Go rest your hand and I’ll send Ahiru to get you when lunch is ready – the two of us can handle everything here on our own.”

“All right.”

Fakir headed off to his room, and Ahiru followed him down the hall. She dropped off her letters on her table, and then made a beeline for the kitchen to help Edel put away her purchases and get started on lunch. She fetched Fakir from his room when the meal was ready, and shooed him back to it to tend to his sore hand once they’d all finished eating. After they were done cleaning up it was then time to head to the workroom to make some floral waters with the flowers they’d bought from Freya.

Ahiru didn’t end up getting to the letters until she retired to her room after dinner, by which point it had started raining softly outside. She lit a lamp and set it on her bedside table so that she could sit up under the covers and listen to both the rain and the fire she’d built in her hearth while she read. Lilie’s letter was the first one in the small stack, and so she chose to read it first.

_MY DEAREST AHIRU_

_Greetings from the distant north! As you will have guessed by now, my beloved Femio and I have relocated to one of his family’s other estates. We are not so very far from the seaside, only a few days’ travel, and I do so long to return there when the weather is more obliging. As it is now, however, things are considerably more horrid. The temperature has cooled down to a rather GHASTLY and un-summerlike state, and I am horrified. Horrified! It is most tragic, do you not think, to move closer to the sea and yet be unable to enjoy it? I weep every day, Ahiru, you must believe it!_

_Fortunately, my darling Femio is here to comfort me and keep me warm, and I must admit to seeing the benefits of chillier climes when I look at it in this way. Teehee! He is a most attentive husband, and so caring, and we are never ever bored with each other. Our portion of the larger Holst estate does well too, and I do my fair share in helping to run it. I daresay our household probably runs smoother than it ever did before with me at its reins! And we are lucky not to have come alone – my Femio’s faithful servant, Montand, accompanied us, and tends to our every need with a devotion and swiftness that put all others of his kind to SHAME. You would be lucky to have someone half so efficient and talented, my dear! My sweet husband also brought along his own personal pet bull, and with some creative wrangling we managed to transport that magnificent statue you saw in the front hall when you attended our glorious wedding. The story of that statue is that my darling Femio wished to be immortalized in art form, and his loving and wonderfully indulgent parents then commissioned one of the finest sculptors in the land to do the job. Obviously they went above and beyond! Currently, we are looking into commissioning painters to capture both our likenesses on canvas. After all, what need is there to keep the walls lined with portraits of stuffy old ancestors when WE are there now? Future generations will thank us!_

_But let me pause briefly in my account of our fabulous life to ask how YOU are. I have been corresponding with Pike, and she claims not to have a young man in her life, and has also said again that you do not either. My dear, this distresses me on both your behalves ever so much! I cannot believe that neither of you have someone that you have your eyes on. I will not believe it! So I implore you: do not hold back any longer! Tell me all that you can, so that I may know how to help you. After all, I have gained some invaluable experience as a married woman by now, and have reams of knowledge to impart on the process by which I ascended to this position, so I am eager to use my skills and wisdom to help the both of you. You deserve it, after all, and I would be remiss if I did not offer my inimitable services to you. Write me back with haste, and help me help you!_

_With all my love and so much more, Lady Lilie Holst_

As usual, Ahiru felt more than a little dazed. Leave it to Lilie to take even a simple question about the welfare of others and make it about herself. She had no doubt that “inimitable” was indeed the correct word to describe what matchmaking “talents” she had to offer, but not in the way Lilie intended it to be. She shook her head a little as if to clear it of what she’d just read, and then folded up the letter and placed it back in the envelope. Next up was a letter from Pike, which she opened with considerably less trepidation.

_Hey, Ahiru!_

_How’ve you been lately? Any luck with that guy yet? I know, you don’t have to write about him if you don’t want to, I just want you to be happy and I want to hear good news from you. He’d have to be a real fool not to see all the good in you, anyway, in my opinion. But don’t take that as me insulting him! Unless you’re mad at him and you want me to, haha. Anyway, though, I hope you’re doing well and that you’re in good shape emotionally and physically. Is that heat wave over yet? I sure hope so. It’s been nasty here too, but I think it’s finally cooling down now. I still don’t know if I could live in a forest like that because the fairies being around would scare the heck out of me – never mind what Mama says, I definitely believe you when you say they’re real! – but at least you have plenty of shade in the parts where it’s okay for humans to go, I guess. Actually, I think I’d like to visit you sometime if I can get away – maybe after Yule? Mama and Papa will want me to attend all the society parties between now and then, YAWN, but maybe I can convince them to let me take a trip once the holidays are past._

_Although, if I just wait a few months more after that, I’ll have my money, and I can just fund the trip myself and come on my own, and then head off wherever I want after that. I’m definitely going SOMEWHERE when that happens, no doubt about it! I’m taking music lessons again to prepare, though they don’t know that, and they had no problem with it because Mama especially thinks it makes me an “accomplished young lady” who will have much to offer her husband. YUCK. But it’s still fun – my voice is getting even better, and I’m not so rusty on the piano anymore, which is great. I’m starting dance up again soon too, which will benefit me when I try to start a stage career. Hey, maybe I’ll run into people who knew your mother! Wouldn’t that be amazing?_

_Anyway, write me back soon, and tell me lots of stuff! Oh, and Lilie’s at her new house with Femio. It’s… a little lonely here, I’ll admit, but at the same time I don’t miss some things. Then again, it can be too quiet sometimes? I have such mixed feelings! I definitely miss you more than her, though, but don’t tell her I said that! (Kidding, I trust you.)_

_Lots of love, Pike_

Ahiru smiled sadly to herself as she finished reading. Poor Pike – she could definitely sympathize. It was probably even harder on her than she was letting on, to have had her two closest friends move away from her like that. At least when she’d come here she’d made friends pretty quickly, but Pike was stuck in the same place and had to either try to become closer to people she didn’t know well, or wait it out until she could leave and find a new place to live and start her career on the stage. It probably didn’t feel worth it to her to get closer to acquaintances right now if she was planning on leaving at the beginning of next year, though, knowing Pike’s pragmatism. Which kind of made sense, really, because she’d just have to say more goodbyes, and have them be left behind as sad as she was now. Still, it couldn’t be easy to be so lonely until then. She hoped Pike would somehow miraculously convince her parents to let her come visit before Yule; the chances seemed low, but it would be so nice to show her around Goldkrone, and introduce her to everyone, and take her into the safe parts of the forest and regale her with stories. Especially since she could trust her not to embarrass her in front of Fakir.

She refolded Pike’s letter, and moved onto the last one. This one bore an unfamiliar name on the return address: Paulamoni Morandi. She frowned down at it for a moment, wondering how this person had gotten her name or if this was a mistake somehow, before tearing the envelope open and pulling out the letter. But no – written at the top in a thin, delicate, looping script was her name. Equal parts baffled and intrigued, Ahiru read on.

_To Miss Ahiru Klein –_

_I am sure you are rather confused to receive this letter, given that we have never met or corresponded before. Allow me to introduce myself – I am Paulamoni Morandi, a former prima ballerina who traveled for many years with the illustrious Eleki Troupe. More specifically, my first three years with the troupe coincided with the last three years that your mother danced with it. My old friend Felix Katz has written to me and told me that you know precious little of her, and asked if I would help rectify the situation and provide you with information about her. I am more than happy to!_

_I have many many stories of her that I will share with you in future letters, if you like, but to start off with I will tell you a little more about myself. When I joined the troupe, I was not yet a soloist, but a humble member of the corps who dreamed of one day taking the stage on my own, with the corps behind me. I thought it a foolish dream, and always second-guessed myself. But there were two people who always encouraged me and did their best to lift my spirits and tell me that my dream was possible. One was my husband Paulo – though the two of us were not yet married at that point – and the other was, of course, your mother. Ahiru, it is no exaggeration to say that she was the heart and soul of the troupe. She treated all she met with kindness and love, and did her best to emotionally support everyone, no matter how “important” to the troupe they were. And that’s another thing – she didn’t view anyone as being more important than anyone else. She always said that everyone had their own strong value that no one else could diminish, no matter where they stood in life. She believed in everyone, and encouraged everyone, and truly had the biggest heart of anyone I’ve ever known._

_It is also no exaggeration to say that the troupe lost something the day she left, and I am not sure it ever regained it. If it did, it must have happened after I myself retired, though I have my doubts. She was irreplaceable. And I know I’m not alone in thinking this! I am still in contact with several others who knew her – some better than I, for their time with the troupe and thus also their friendship with her predated mine – and I am more than willing to write to them on your behalf and have them send you their memories and stories. I wish also to share my own stories and memories, and furthermore, if you like, I have a store of newspaper articles and Eleki Troupe programs and some sketches that I would be more than happy to compile for you. I also know people who knew your father well – would you like me to write to them in addition to the others? Please, write me back at your earliest convenience and let me know your thoughts and feelings on these offers. As I said, I would be more than happy to do all of this for you. Your mother did so much for me, it is the least I can do to help her daughter become better acquainted with her._

_Best wishes, Paulamoni Morandi_

Ahiru wiped at her eyes and sniffled, and then reread the letter twice more, each time with blurred vision. She was careful not to let her tears drip onto the paper, though, and resolved that answering it would be the very first thing she’d do as soon as she had both time and energy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Morandi: From the Italian medieval given name _Morando_ meaning "steadfast".


	27. Chapter 27

The remainder of September passed lazily by. Just past the mid-point it seemed as though summer would have a last gasp as Freya had mentioned, for the temperature did indeed go up a little, but fortunately it subsided before it became truly warm and then cooled back down. Meanwhile, all around them the colors of the season burst forth, transforming the leaves of Goldkrone’s trees from green to glorious shades of red, orange, and yellow. Autumn flowers fully replaced the last stragglers of summer, and seasonal produce began to flow steadily into the market, allowing for the return to the kitchen of recipes that utilized those ingredients. Ahiru savored every bit of it, for it all seemed even sweeter than usual in the wake of that heat wave. It was also easier to enjoy it now than it had been last year, for she was much more settled in these days than she had been back then.

The first Friday in October brought the deepest chill of the current autumn yet. Weak, thin sunlight barely managed to peek through clouds that were a mixture of white and pale grey, and the wind did not need to rage and howl to sink its icy teeth seemingly down to the bone, cutting through all protective layers of clothing. Rain seemed a nebulously possible outcome, but nevertheless Ahiru and Fakir departed after lunch to Mr. Katz’ house. The dry skies held on their way there, and Mr. Vogel welcomed them in as usual, instead of sending them away. In the parlor a lively fire awaited, and after their walk through the frigid air the offer of hot tea was more than graciously accepted.

Over an hour later, Mr. Katz set down his cup – having had two servings of tea during that time – and let out a deep sigh. “A most rousing discussion indeed,” he said, his mustache quivering in his amusement. “You two are both very opinionated – and let me say that I do not find that to be a bad thing at all,” he added hastily. “I have had students before who were afraid to express thoughts they felt were at odds with ‘the norm’, or who simply had very little in the way of observations to make in general. They simply read the books and took them at face value without bothering to analyze the deeper meanings, and that makes for very disappointing lessons. My aim, after all, is to make people think about the things they consume, for how can there be true learning otherwise?”

“Yeah, I can see how that’d be disappointing.” Ahiru nodded. “I – I really wasn’t very good at it when we started last year, but… I think I can think more critically now and discuss things better, thanks to all that you’ve taught me. I wish I’d been better to start off with, though…”

“Never you mind that,” Mr. Katz said gently. “Having to develop the skill doesn’t make it any less valid or real. All skills must be developed over time and practice, after all. I am proud of you for your progress over the past year, and have enjoyed teaching you.” He settled back in his chair. “It is usually around this time that I discuss with students whether they wish to stay on with the lessons, or give them up; I probably should have had this discussion with you a couple weeks ago or so, but distractions happen and I quite forgot at the time.”

“Do… do you want me to stay on?” Ahiru frowned. “Am I _supposed_ to leave after a year?”

“Only if you want to.” Mr. Katz coughed into a handkerchief. “And I suppose I’ve misrepresented it a bit anyway – this conversation is usually more of a year in review sort of thing, and focuses then about where to go from there. I say that you have had a fine year of learning, at least from your teacher’s perspective, for your critical thinking skills have developed and you have become more open and less hesitant about expressing your opinions to me, even when they differ from the popular views. If you’ve enjoyed them too, then by all means stay on. Some people feel a year is enough, others think it is only just the beginning. The choice is yours.”

“I – I want to stay on!” Ahiru nodded vigorously. “I think we’re only really just starting too, and there’re so many books I want to read, and I like discussing them with both of you…” She glanced briefly at Fakir. “I – I think it’s really helped me, and I have so much fun… I don’t want to give up the lessons any time soon.”

“Then continue we shall.” Mr. Katz smiled. “For I too enjoy having the both of you as students, and am glad that you wish to keep furthering your education.” He coughed into the handkerchief again, and then wiped at his nose with it. “And since that’s settled, I’ll present to you our next book to be read. Perhaps it was a bit presumptuous of me to buy them without knowing if you wanted to stay on with the lessons, but then, I could always have found use for it by assigning it to another student or donating it.” He chuckled. “But in any case…” He shoved the handkerchief into his breast pocket and then retrieved a bag from beside his chair. From it he withdrew two thick, heavy-looking books with dark leather covers. “This will take some time to complete, but I think you will both enjoy it.”

“What’s ‘some time’?” Fakir asked, frowning.

“Well… given the variable lengths of the chapters, I plan to assign you to read either three some weeks and four on others, but even with those extra chapters I think we should be well into November or even early December by the time we finish, and that’s without taking into account any weeks I may be forced to cancel due to health and the weather.” He brushed some dust off his pant leg. “Is that going to be a problem?”

“… No.” Fakir shook his head. “I was just… just curious, is all.” Something flickered in his eyes, and then was gone.

“Well, I understand that.” Mr. Katz handed Ahiru the book as she got up to take her copy from him. “Some books are rather intimidating in their length, and I find that many books of an impressive length are not so impressive when it comes to the actual reading of them, for various reasons. This one, however, is different. I would not assign it if I didn’t have confidence that you’ll find something of value in it.”

“ _Beyond the Stars_ ,” Ahiru read, tracing her fingers over the title that had been embossed into the leather. “That’s a pretty name.”

“I quite agree.” Mr. Katz smiled. “I do hope you’ll like it – I know the size of the book seems daunting now, but it does not feel like a slow and dull read once you begin.”

“I’m sure I will!” Ahiru beamed back at him. “I trust your taste, and I’ve found interesting things in all the books you’ve assigned. I know you wouldn’t have us read something if it had no value at all.”

“I appreciate your confidence.” He handed Fakir his copy too. “This week I think I shall assign you to read only the first three chapters. Read, make notes as usual, and we will see each other next Friday, weather and health permitting. Unless either of you has other engagements?”

“Nope.” Ahiru shook her head. “I – I always keep Fridays free so I can come over. I mean, sometimes I can’t because of things coming up that I can’t help, like people getting sick or hurt suddenly, but I don’t make plans ahead of time, you know?”

“Same here,” Fakir said. “I sometimes go into the forge on Friday mornings, but I keep the afternoons free, and my boss is very understanding.”

“Mmmm.” Mr. Katz nodded. “I am grateful to you both for your dedication and commitment. Obviously your jobs must come first, I understand that, but I have had students who felt no need to honor a regular tutoring schedule and had attendance that was… erratic at best.” He sighed. “Emergencies are one thing, but… well, you don’t want to hear the bitter rantings of an old man.” He laughed. “If neither of you has any more questions, then I think I shall end things here – I do not wish to keep you any longer from home and hearth on such a day, and indeed I am feeling rather more of a twinge now in my knee. I fear the rain must be drawing closer…”

“Oh!” Ahiru leapt back up from her seat. “I – I’m sorry, yes, we should definitely go…” She picked up her book bag and shoved her notes and the new book into it. “S-sorry…”

“It’s quite all right, don’t worry yourselves about it.” Mr. Katz smiled. “I had a very pleasant visit and am sorry I must cut it short, my apologies for such rudeness.”

“It – it’s not rude!” Ahiru shook her head. “You can’t help feeling pain cause of the weather and your poor knee, we understand… right, Fakir?”

“Yeah.” Fakir nodded. “Just look after yourself and don’t worry about seeming rude.” He retrieved his own things. “We’ll see you next week. Take care, all right?”

“Mrrrr, yes… and you two as well.” Mr. Katz glanced at the window. “Make your way home with haste, I would hate for you to get caught in a downpour and catch cold.” He pulled his handkerchief out of his pocket and coughed again. “Until next week, then.”

“Yup!” Ahiru adjusted her bag in her arms and smiled. “Bye!”

They got their cloaks from the front hall, and Mr. Vogel let them back out of the house. The clouds had indeed darkened and increased in number while they’d been inside, and the wind seemed to have picked up speed and grown even harsher; Ahiru bundled her bag against herself under her cloak and cast anxious glances up at the sky the whole walk home. Fortunately all remained dry as they went along and no ominous rolls of thunder sounded, making it easier to relax.

A surprise awaited them at home that drove all thoughts of a possible rainstorm quite out of their heads, however: the sight of a royal carriage parked outside the house. Fakir halted suddenly, and Ahiru wound up a few steps ahead of him before coming to a complete stop herself and goggling at the sight. “Wh-what the… who could be here? And why?” Her stomach churned. “I – I hope Rue or Friedhold aren’t sick or anything…”

“Well, we won’t find out by standing around out here.” Fakir recovered himself and started walking again. “Let’s go inside and see what the reason for this visit is.”

“R-right!” Ahiru followed him into the house, where they hung up their cloaks and scarves and put away their gloves before leaving their books and notes on the front table and heading towards the sitting room.

They found Edel there, along with Prince Siegfried; the two were sitting on the sofas, but rose at the sound of the door opening. “Ah, there you are, Fakir.” Edel nodded to him. “His Highness has come to see you today.”

“Hey.” Fakir frowned. “Sorry for keeping you waiting, I was at tutoring and I just got home… have you been here long?”

“No, no.” Siegfried held up his hands and shook his head. “You have nothing to apologize for. I have been here for about twenty minutes, I would say, but that is my own fault – you had told me already of your weekly literature lessons, and it either slipped my mind or I misjudged the time and how long it would take me to reach your home. It is my own folly at play here, not any rudeness on your part.” He smiled. “In either case, though, it is good to see you.”

“Yeah.” Fakir nodded. “It’s good to see you too. What brings you here?”

“Well, as Edel has mentioned already, I am here to see you.” Siegfried tugged on one of his lace-embellished cuffs. “I had a wish to speak with you, a wish bolstered by an impulse that occurred to me late last night.”

“Which Ahiru and I will leave you to discuss in privacy,” Edel cut in. “As we have no desire to intrude.” She started to walk towards the door, even as Fakir headed further in, but then paused. “Would you like me to bring some tea, however?”

“None for me, thank you, but I appreciate the offer.” Siegfried shook his head and smiled. “The use of your lovely parlor will be quite enough; my gratitude is yours.”

“Of course, your majesty.” Edel nodded back at him, and then walked out of the room with Ahiru in tow. She closed the door once they’d both exited. “While they have their chat, I have some work I want to do in the basement,” she said to Ahiru as they walked away. “You’re welcome to join me if you wish.”

“I…” Ahiru hesitated. Did Edel not know that it was possible to eavesdrop on sitting room conversations from the basement? Maybe not, considering that she’d lived here alone for years before taking her on as an apprentice, followed by Fakir moving in as well. And after all, last time had been a shouting match, which hopefully would be avoided this visit since Rue wasn’t here. “Okay… that sounds good… can I just get my stuff from the front hall and put it in my room first, though?”

“Of course, of course.” Edel smoothed down her skirts. “I’ll meet you down there, take your time.”

“Okay, but it really won’t take long.” So saying, Ahiru hurried off to the front hall, where she retrieved her book bag, and then took it to her room. She didn’t bother to unpack her notes and new book, but instead just left them on her table and shrugged her spare work robe on over her dress before heading into the basement.

Edel was in the process of lining up some empty jars on one end of the work table down there when Ahiru reached the bottom of the stairs, and looked over as she heard her footsteps. “Ah, thank you, Ahiru. Could you do me a favor and fetch over some herbs and flowers? I have a mind to chop and store them, as they’re ready for that, and then transport some up to the workroom, as I should get a head start on a few things tomorrow.”

“Of course!” Ahiru nodded. “Which ones do you need?”

“Lavender, sage, rosemary, and white and yellow roses.” Edel set a couple of paring knives down on the table. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome!” Ahiru darted over to where the herbs and flowers in question had been laid out or hung up to dry, and filled her arms with them. She set them down on the table and separated them into piles, which she and Edel then divvied up between them for chopping and plucking.

They worked quietly, the only noises they made being that of the dried plants rustling and the knives chopping away, and so they were soon able to hear bits of the conversation happening above them. Not everything could be easily made out, but some pieces filtered down to them through the ceiling, and Ahiru found herself wishing that Edel had chosen some other activity, purely because she hated to invade Fakir’s privacy again. That, and also because she feared that he and Siegfried might make reference to their brief time as lovers, and Fakir hadn’t told Edel about that part of himself at all. There was no doubt in Ahiru’s mind that Edel would be accepting of it, given that she herself had a romantic relationship with another woman, but that didn’t erase the fact that Fakir hadn’t made the active choice to share that information with her, and for her to overhear it without his consent seemed dreadfully inappropriate, to say the least.

Luckily, the small fragments of conversation that made their way to them turned out to be pretty innocuous. Fakir asked after the welfare of Rue and baby Friedhold, and Siegfried spoke at length in what seemed to be a pride-filled tone about how well both were doing, and their recent visit to his mother’s country estate, which they had just returned from scarcely a week ago. They now were working with a gifted artist – Ahiru smiled to herself at the mention of Malen, even though it wasn’t by name – on a family portrait of the three of them, posing for sketches and testing out what worked best. Ahiru did her best to tune it all out regardless, in the interest of not intruding on what was meant to be a discussion between the two of them.

And an easy time she had of it, until it became impossible to ignore just as she and Edel were coming to the end of their work.

“– know you don’t wish to discuss that, but I do have –”

“– at least you’re learning.”

“– in mind, I have an offer for you, and I do hope –”

“– might consider it. Just say – ”

“You know,” Edel said suddenly, drowning out what was said next. “I honestly did not realize how easy it is to eavesdrop from down here.” She frowned. “In my defense, I hadn’t been in this situation until you two moved in here.”

“Yeah, I, um…” Ahiru swallowed. “I overheard something once before, when Rue and Siegfried came over to see him back in February… but I thought it was just because they were talking really loudly and arguing… I was trying to tune it out earlier, but I just feel too weird now.”

“The same goes for me.” Edel nodded. “What say you we get these things into their jars and then head back up? And we can talk about whatever we like as we work, to drown them out.”

“That sounds good to me, and anyway we’re pretty much done chopping, so we shouldn’t take too long.” Ahiru carefully scooped some rose petals into her hands and poured them into a jar. “S-so, um… we got a new book from Mr. Katz today, cause we finished the last one, and we had a really good talk about it, and this new one is going to take us until late November or something to finish, and it’s called _Beyond the Stars_ … have you ever read it?”

“No, I can’t say I have.” Edel filled a jar with rosemary. “I’ve heard of it, though – it’s one of Ebine’s favorites. She makes a habit of rereading it every winter. Why winter I don’t know, since I haven’t read it myself, but maybe there’s some reason for it if Mr. Katz has waited until this season to do so.” She smiled fondly. “Maybe I’ll get my own copy from Althaus’ and join you two in reading it, since Ebine’s tried to cajol me into reading it for a while now.”

“Ooh, that’d be fun!” Ahiru sealed up another jar. “How’s Autor doing, anyway? I haven’t really seen him or heard anything about him in a while…”

“As well as can be expected after the shock he received, I suppose.” Edel shrugged. “It is never easy to have a deeply-held belief shattered so harshly, you know? But his mother tells me he is making progress in his emotional recovery, and that throwing himself into his studies seems to be helping. At the very least, the music I overheard playing last time I visited the shop seemed less dour, and he was humbler and pleasanter to interact with when he emerged.”

“Oh, that’s good.” Ahiru smiled. “I – I’m glad he’s doing better, cause even though I didn’t really like him after how rude he was I still felt sorry for him when he had that happen.” She paused. “I think he’s still got a crush on Rue, though, cause I think I saw him trying to see her at the solstice, only he obviously would’ve been disappointed that she wasn’t there.”

“I’m not surprised. That he’s still sweet on her, that is,” she added. “But he will recover from that too, in time, as he realizes that his affections will never be returned.”

“… Yeah.” Ahiru looked down at the jar she’d just filled with yellow rose petals. “How long does that usually take?”

“I can’t say. It appears to be one of those things that is different for everyone.” Edel frowned. “Why?”

“O-oh, no reason, just – just curious.” Ahiru cleared her throat. “Anyway, which ones do we need to take up to the workroom?”

“Just the white roses and the lavender for now.” Edel lifted up the jar of rose petals, and Ahiru followed suit with one stuffed full of lavender. “I’ll get the others later.”

“Oh, okay.”

As they reached the top of the stairs the sitting room door opened, and Siegfried emerged, followed by Fakir. “I know I said so already, but I really cannot express enough how grateful I am that you agreed,” Siegfried said as he walked out. “I still feel as though we have not spent enough time together this past year, and I will always regret that, but being able to share this last such excursion will do something to help absolve that guilt for me, even if only a little.”

“Tch. Don’t be ridiculous – you’ve had a new marriage and now a child to tend to. You’ve been busy, and so have I.” Fakir shook his head. “You don’t have anything to feel guilty about.”

“I would disagree with you most emphatically, as you already know, but…” Siegfried trailed off as he saw Edel and Ahiru coming round in their direction. “Ah, hello again, ladies.”

“Hello, Prince Siegfried.” Edel nodded to him. “Is there something you need?”

“No, there is nothing I have need of, but thank you all the same.” Siegfried bowed slightly. “Regretfully, I must depart your company, but I do thank you for the brief use of your house.”

“You are most welcome, as always.” Edel shifted the jar in her arms. “I hope it has been a pleasant visit for you.”

“Indeed it has been.” Siegfried smiled. “For Fakir and I have had an excellent talk in which we caught each other up on our lives to date, and he has also done me the honor of agreeing to join me and his former comrades in arms on one last hunt next week.”

“Oh?” Edel raised an eyebrow. “That certainly is good news, I hope you will both find it enjoyable.”

“I have no doubt that we will.” Siegfried’s smile seemed to dim slightly, and his eyes looked sad for a moment. “It has been too long since we spent such time together, and I – well, I have missed my dear friend, let me say that much. Being a husband and father is fulfilling and satisfying, of course, but one needs friendship as well to round out one’s life.”

“I agree.” Edel nodded. “The healthiest marriages all have that in common: the couple’s ability to maintain friendships of their own outside the relationship.”

“Yes, which is why I encourage Rue to form bonds with others, and I try to take my own advice and see Fakir when I can.” Siegfried paused. “In any case, I will babble on no longer, as I see you have work that I mustn’t keep you from.” He bowed again, and Ahiru and Edel did their best to curtsey even though they held large jars in their arms. “I bid you all good day, and good health, and – oh yes, on that subject, Rue wished for me to send her regards to you in particular, Ahiru.”

“O-oh, really?” Ahiru smiled. “W-well, tell her I send mine too, and that I hope she’s happy and doing well, a-and that I hope Friedhold is too!”

“I will.” Siegfried smiled again, and then turned to Fakir. “As for you, my dear friend, I will see you next Saturday for the hunt.”

“Yeah.” Fakir nodded at him. “See you then.”

“I look forward to it.” He lifted a hand as if to wave to them all. “Farewell.”

Fakir walked Siegfried to the door while Ahiru and Edel took their jars to the workroom. Edel would have gone back on her own for the others, but Ahiru insisted on helping her and so they made another trip down. They then cleaned up, and arranged things in the workroom in preparation for what was to be done in there the next day, before heading to the kitchen to light a fire and prepare tea and a dinner spread. Fakir came in partway through, and immediately started helping without saying a word. Not until they all sat down with their tea and started filling their plates did anyone speak, and the first one to do so was Edel. “So, you’re going on a hunt next week?”

“Yeah.” Fakir spooned some honey into his tea. “Siegfried wanted me to go with them all on one last hunt. For old times’ sake, he said.”

“On Saturday, correct?” Edel arranged some slices of ham on a piece of bread.

“Yes. I’ll leave early in the morning, have breakfast at the castle, and then depart with him and the rest of the knights.” He spread some jam on a slice of bread. “I’ll be back late in the day, and I’ll bring some meat with me from what we catch.”

“Oh, excellent.” Edel took a sip of her tea. “Perhaps we could make a larger dinner of it, and I’ll invite Charon? If you don’t mind, of course.”

“No, that sounds like a good idea.” Fakir nodded. “Go ahead.”

“You haven’t been on a hunt for a long time, have you?” Ahiru asked.

“Not since last November, no.” Fakir started to say something else, but was cut off as thunder rumbled outside, acting as a prelude to the rain that started pouring down a second later. “This will be my first since then,” he added after a moment.

“Yeah… I thought it had been that long…” Ahiru frowned down at her food. “And we met when you were coming back from one, remember? Over a year ago now…”

Fakir nodded. “Of course I remember. It was good timing that we were returning at just that time… I hate to think of what might have happened if we’d been any later.” A shudder went through him.

“M-me too.” Ahiru shivered. “It was scary enough as it was, I didn’t know what was going to happen to us… to me… but then you all rode up and you saved us. And you, you saved me personally.” She smiled. “It was the first time we ever saw each other, though we didn’t really get introduced.”

“Yeah… that didn’t happen until I came by to see Edel a few days later.” Fakir grimaced. “I… regret being so rude to you.”

“It’s okay, I already forgave you for that.” Ahiru shook her head. “And anyway, it just goes to show how much things have changed since then, right? We know each other a lot better now, and we’re really good friends… and you’re living here now… our lives have really changed a lot!”

“… In some ways.” Something in Fakir’s eyes flickered. “Much has changed, yeah… but much has also stayed the same.”

Ahiru frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Nothing much.” He shrugged. “The town itself hasn’t really changed, and your life has stayed a steady routine ever since you came here. That’s all.”

“Mmmm… yeah… I guess…” Ahiru stared down at her food. “And you’d know better about the town than I would, since I’ve only been here a year and you were born here…”

“Yeah.” Fakir took a drink of tea. “It’s still largely the same as it was last year at this time, save for the fact that we have a new princess – officially – and they’ve had a child.”

“… Yeah.” Ahiru swallowed. She knew better than to think he was telling her everything – she could clearly tell that he wasn’t – but she didn’t want to press it. She could also tell that he wasn’t entirely comfortable with the line of conversation, after all, and prodding him would be selfish and unkind. She’d leave it alone, and if he ever wanted to talk about what hadn’t changed (something she had definite theories on), he could come to her when he felt ready, like the night he’d told her about his brief affair with another man. Another man that had turned out to be the prince of Schwangau, but that was information he didn’t know she was aware of, so she’d keep quiet on _that_ too.

The conversation turned to other things, and Ahiru tried to clear her mind instead of dwelling on Fakir’s behavior. She managed pretty well, at least until they were all done eating and cleaning up and he retired to his room immediately, leaving her alone with her thoughts. She headed back to her room and did her best to distract herself with other things until it was time to go to bed. Even after she doused the lamp, though, she stayed up for a while brooding on Fakir while listening to the pouring rain and the crackle of the fire she’d lit in her hearth.

The next week passed by more quickly than Ahiru would have liked. She kept busy with witchcraft work and a trip to the market and reading _Beyond the Stars_ , and on Friday she and Fakir went to see Mr. Katz again. Another storm had hit on Tuesday, but cleared up late in the afternoon on Wednesday, and Thursday and Friday were clear and sunny, if also crisp and cool, with the promise of another fine day to follow on Saturday. As such, Mr. Katz was in good health for their tutoring session, and they enjoyed themselves again, discussing the first three chapters and then going home with an assignment to read the next four this time.

Ahiru rose with the dawn on Saturday morning, after a night spend mostly tossing and turning, and dressed and readied herself as quickly and quietly as she could. In the next room she could faintly hear Fakir doing the same; when his door opened she sprang up from her bed and rushed out into the hall. “Fakir…”

“Ahiru?” He turned to see her, and her heart gave a leap at how handsome he looked, all dressed up in clothes appropriate for a hunt. “Is something wrong?” He frowned.

“N-no, not really, just… I wanted to say bye before you left, and…” She hesitated, and then flung herself forward, wrapping her arms around him and pressing her face into his chest. “I, um… please be careful, okay? And come home safely…”

“… I will.” Fakir slipped his arms around her and returned her hug. “I promise. This won’t be like last time – those bandits are gone, and the woods are safer these days.”

“I hope so.” Her voice was muffled by his shirt. “I – I don’t want you to get hurt again…”

“I know.” He patted her back before pulling away a little, just enough to look down at her. “I swear I won’t. I’ll be cautious and careful, and I’ll try to be home as soon as I can.”

“When’s that?” Ahiru brushed some of her unruly hair out of her eye. “N-not to rush you or anything, I know you want to spend time with Siegfried and everybody, and I don’t want you to feel like you have to be home super early, don’t feel guilty or anything…”

“I don’t. Don’t worry about that.” Fakir shook his head. “It depends on how long the actual hunt takes, of course, but at the very latest I should be home sometime in the afternoon. As soon as we get the spoils of the hunt back to the castle and it’s been divvied up, I’ll take my share and come straight home.”

“N-no, you… you don’t have to do that…” Ahiru wrung her hands. “Isn’t there usually some kind of party or feast or something afterwards? I feel like you told me that once…”

“Yeah, there is, and I know Siegfried will want me to be there.” Fakir shrugged. “But I’d honestly rather be here with you, and Edel and Charon. So I’ll skip it.”

“Wh-why?” Ahiru frowned. “Why not spend more time with them? It’s been a while since you really did, right?”

“Because I…” Fakir paused. “Well, it’s… don’t you remember? I also told you that I’m not one for parties. Here will be quieter, more like what I prefer. And I’m not all that close to any of them anymore, anyway. I’m more comfortable being at home.”

“Oh… okay… I mean…” She twisted her hands a little more. “N-not that I wouldn’t want to spend time with you or anything, that’s not what I’m worried about, I just… I don’t want you to feel like you _have_ to rush home, I don’t want you to feel pressured or guilty, you should be able to spend time with your friends…”

“I already told you, I don’t feel pressured or guilty at all.” He shook his head. “And… _you’re_ my friend, remember? So don’t worry about me not being able to spend time with friends or anything like that. Because I do.”

“Oh… oh…” Ahiru blinked and swallowed. “I, um… I guess I… I don’t know, I guess I’m silly…” She looked away, pressing her lips together.

“It’s all right,” Fakir said softly. “Don’t feel bad. I know what you tend to think of yourself. You’ve got it wrong, of course, but it doesn’t mean you don’t feel that way anyway or that I don’t understand.”

Ahiru swallowed again, trying to push down the lump in her throat. “Th-thank you…”

“Of course.” Fakir reached out and took her hands in his, and gently squeezed them. “I’ll see you later, then – and I promise I’ll be back in one piece.”

“O-oh, yeah, I – I don’t want to keep you.” Ahiru squeezed his fingers. “I – I’ll walk you to the door and we can say bye there…”

“All right.” He let go of her hands and started walking away, but kept pace with her when she caught up with him. They stopped at the door once he’d opened it, and he turned back to look at her. “See you later, Ahiru.”

“Bye, Fakir.” Ahiru waved at him and smiled. “Have a good time, and see you later.”

“Thanks. I will.” He smiled, making her heart flutter again, and then turned away and began to walk up the path.

Ahiru watched him until he disappeared round the bend, and then closed and locked the door. Edel would probably be up soon, maybe she was even awake now, but her stomach didn’t feel ready for breakfast, and so she returned to her room and closed the door before sitting back down on the bed. Outside her window the sun was climbing into a perfect, cloudless blue sky while birds chirped and fought over the seed she’d left out last night, but it all seemed cold and distant to her. Ahiru’s hands twisted in her skirt, and she swallowed hard, fresh tears pricking at her eyes.

What if he was wrong? What if some bandits had survived, regrouped? What if a different band of them decided to ambush the prince and his knights today? What if he didn’t come back safely to her and broke his promise? She couldn’t bear it if anything happened to him. Last November’s attack had been bad enough, back when they were just starting to be friends and her feelings for him hadn’t been anything more than a mild crush. But now… now they were so much closer, best friends, and she was in love with him to boot. How could her heart take seeing him hurt like that again, or worse? The thought of losing him made her want to retch despite not having eaten anything since last night’s dinner (and even then she hadn’t eaten that much, for her stomach had already been in knots over what was to come today).

The rational part of her brain knew that she would only feel sicker and get weaker if she didn’t eat, though, so after a while she made herself get up and go to the kitchen. She ate a small and gentle meal of hot cereal, toasted bread with jam, and tea with plenty of honey – no savory meats or cheeses to upset her fragile stomach. After breakfast it was then time to head to the market to pick up some fresh supplies for tonight’s dinner, so she slipped on her cloak, scarf, and gloves and accompanied Edel there.

It proved to be somewhat of a good distraction, at least for a little while. When they got home they put away their purchases, and then Edel got to work baking some bread for later. Lunch would be lighter today to allow for a larger dinner, and Ahiru picked at a small cheese sandwich and some leftover soup before heading back to her room and trying to read more of _Beyond the Stars_. She managed to absorb maybe half a chapter, and then gave up and lay back on her bed. She couldn’t sleep, and she couldn’t read, so what could she do to fill up the hours until Fakir got home? It seemed as though an interminable void of boring yet stressful hours stretched out ahead of her.

And yet she somehow _did_ drift off – perhaps owing to the largely sleepless night she’d just had – and didn’t wake up until the doorbell jolted her out of her nap. Startled and disoriented (for it was considerably darker now than it had been when she’d fallen asleep), she blinked up at the ceiling for a minute before dragging herself out of bed. She paused for a moment in front of her mirror to make sure her hair looked mostly presentable, and then hurried off to the front door, hoping that whoever was there wasn’t too impatient with her when she finally got to them.

In her groggy state, however, Ahiru had forgotten that someone else was in the house, and fully capable of answering the door. When she reached the front hall it was to find that Edel was already in the process of letting Charon in, and she arrived in time to catch the tail end of what Edel was saying. “ – good to see you, glad you could make it. The bread’s done and the venison is roasting, so come to the kitchen and join us.”

“Fakir’s already home?” Ahiru asked in a small voice. Both Charon and Edel turned to look at her.

“Yes, he is.” Edel nodded. “He’s in the kitchen. And Charon’s just arrived too.”

“Y-yeah, I… hi, Charon.” Ahiru’s stomach churned, and her heart was racing. “I, um… I’ll see you both in the kitchen…”

She rushed off without waiting for an answer and found Fakir there, just as Edel had said. He was in his usual spot at the table, and turned to see her at the sound of the door. “Hey, Ahiru.”

“U-um, hi…” Ahiru took a couple steps forward. “Wh-when did you get home?”

“About an hour and a half ago.” Fakir frowned. “Is something wrong?”

“N-no… w-well, maybe…” She looked down, and clasped her hands together so she wouldn’t wring them. “Sort of, I mean, it’s just… how come you didn’t come and say hi when you got home?”

“I tried to.” A look up revealed that nothing about his expression indicated that he was lying. “I knocked on your door, and said your name, but you didn’t answer, so I…” His face turned a little red. “I opened your door and saw that you were asleep, and I didn’t want to wake you up – that seemed rude. So I just came in here so I could wait for you.”

“Oh.” Ahiru’s shoulders sagged, and the knots in her stomach untied themselves. “That’s… I mean, I wouldn’t have minded if you’d woken me up, but I understand… that makes sense…”

“I’m sorry.” Fakir frowned again. “I didn’t mean to upset you, I know you were worried about me coming home safely… I just didn’t think you’d appreciate being woken up.”

“It’s okay.” Ahiru smiled. “It’s not your fault I fell asleep, and I guess technically it’d be rude to wake somebody up like that… but now you know for next time that I’d be okay with it, and I’m not mad at you or anything.”

“All right.” Fakir seemed to let out a small sigh. “There won’t be a next time, though – I’m not doing this again.”

“Not doing what again?” Charon opened the door, and Ahiru quickly moved to her usual seat to make room for him and Edel to enter the kitchen. “What’d I miss?”

“Hunting.” Fakir shifted in his seat. “This was the last one.”

It couldn’t, Ahiru abruptly realized, have taken Edel and Charon _that_ long to reach the kitchen from the front door, and going at a normal pace meant they should’ve walked in at an earlier point in her conversation with Fakir. Had they stayed back to let them talk a bit? Did they think there was something between them? Her face burned at the idea. “H-how come? I forgot to ask you that before… why is it the last hunt? If – if you don’t mind me asking, that is?”

“Because of my injury.” Fakir shrugged, his expression neutral. “And my retirement from the knights. It was easy enough to participate in them when I was still a knight, but it’s a bit of a hassle to do now that I live here. And honestly I was never all that attached to them anyway – it has its moments, but it’s not something I regret giving up.”

“Yeah, I – ah, thanks, Edel.” Charon accepted the mug of beer she handed him, and took a long pull from it. “Ah, hits the spot.” He sighed. “But anyway, as I was starting to say… I really don’t blame you there, Fakir. The castle’s no short walk from here, and before today your last experience with those hunts was… well, pretty unpleasant.” He looked down into his mug. “You were… careful today, right? No trouble came up?”

“None.” Fakir shook his head. “The woods have been much better patrolled since that day, and that particular bandit gang was wiped out. What few survived are locked up in the royal dungeons.” He got up and poured himself a mug of beer that he brought back over to the table. “And we only hunted deer today, not boar.”

“That’s good.” Charon took a large gulp from his beer. “Not that I would say no to a bit of that to eat, but I’m glad you had a safer time of it. Plus there’s nothing wrong with some well-cooked venison.”

“Yeah.” Fakir took another drink as well. “I brought home one of the legs, Edel has it roasting now. It’ll be a while still, though.”

“I don’t mind.” Charon shrugged. “Gives us the chance to catch up.” He looked over at where Edel was preparing some dumplings on the stove. “You need a hand with anything?”

“Not at all.” Edel glanced over and smiled. “You sit, talk to your son. And that goes for you too, Ahiru,” she added, just as Ahiru started to open her mouth to say something. “You just relax, talk to Fakir and Charon. I have everything under control.”

“Oh, okay.” Ahiru fidgeted slightly, and then looked at Fakir. “Did – did you have a good time today?”

“I suppose, yeah.” Fakir stared down into his beer. “I hadn’t been in so long that I felt a bit rusty, but it was good to ride, at least, and once I got back into the swing of things I guess I enjoyed myself. It wasn’t what I would’ve chosen to spend the day doing, but it was a good time nevertheless.”

“Really?” Charon got up to refill his mug. “I know you said it wasn’t your favorite activity, but that still surprises me to hear for some reason. You don’t miss riding with Siegfried the way you used to? I know you two were really close back during your knight days… did that change?”

“To some degree, yeah.” Fakir drank some more. “It was bound to happen – he has a wife and a son now, and I don’t live in the castle anymore, of course we were going to grow apart. We’re still friends, but it’s not the way it was.”

“That’s a shame.” Charon sat back down. “I remember how inseparable you two used to be… I know it was inevitable, what with your lives going in different directions, but it’s always painful to have a friendship lose something like that. If you ever want to talk about it, you know where I live.” He chuckled.

“Thanks, but… I’m fine.” Fakir shook his head. “No, really, I am – I knew we’d drift apart, and I’ve not lacked for friendship even in his absence.” His gaze flickered over to Ahiru for a moment. “When I rode with them all today, it made me realize how little I miss that life these days… I think I’m better off where I am now. I just…” He trailed off, and took another sip. “I’m fine. Don’t worry so much about me.”

“Hmmm, yeah… I guess, now that I think about it, that you really must be okay with it if you skipped out on the party they usually hold after hunts.” Charon wiped his mouth. “Or did they not have one this time?”

“It’s happening as we speak.” Fakir shrugged. “But I’ve never really been much for parties, so I left… I’d rather be here.”

“Mmmm. I can understand that.” Was it Ahiru’s imagination, or did Charon glance briefly and knowingly at her? “I bet Siegfried was disappointed, though.”

“A bit.” Fakir took another drink. “He understood, though, and told me to send his regards to all of you.”

“That’s kind of him.” Charon smiled. “Send him mine too next time you see him, all right?”

“Yeah, I will.” Fakir nodded.

He and Charon then moved on to discussing more specific details of hunting, followed by work talk, none of which particularly interested Ahiru. She eventually got up and wandered over to try and help Edel with cooking dinner, but she shooed her back to the table, assuring her that everything was fine and she should go relax. When the venison was finally done roasting they had to wait a little longer to slice into it; only at that point did they eat, feasting on the meat and dumplings and bread, as well as the vegetables Edel had prepared. Dessert followed too, to round off the meal, and consisted of a simple apple cake purchased earlier in the day from Ebine.

“Excellent meal.” Charon leaned back in his seat and patted his stomach. “Really, can’t remember the last time I dined so well. Thanks, both of you – Fakir for bringing home the meat and Edel for cooking everything.”

“Give all your thanks to Edel.” Fakir shifted in his seat. “All I did was ride along on the hunt, I barely did anything.”

“Modest as ever, I see.” Charon laughed. “Some things really don’t change.”

“… No.” Fakir looked down at his empty plate. “They don’t.”

“That’s all right. Not everything needs to change.” Charon drained his mug, evidently having missed the sudden downturn of Fakir’s mood. “I don’t know about anyone else, but I’m just fine without any major upheaval in my life. Give me a steady routine from day to day, no need to make things ‘interesting’.” He laughed again.

“Too true.” Edel set aside her empty wine glass. “We’re fortunate to live in stable times, in a peaceful principality. Barring any disasters on a personal level, our lives all look to remain fairly ‘boring’, at least by some people’s standards.”

“Fine by me.” Charon looked around at all of them. “So let’s all keep ourselves healthy and safe, eh? I’d toast to a steady, humdrum routine, but I’m afraid my drink has run dry.” He chuckled.

Edel smiled. “Would you like a refill?”

“Nah, thanks, I’ll pass.” He waved a hand weakly. “I know when to cut myself off, and besides, I should be getting home anyway.” He glanced out the window; all had gone completely dark some time ago, and there was only a thin sliver of a crescent moon in the sky. “Not a good idea to go stumbling home in the dark without all your wits about you, short walk or not.”

“Good point.” Edel rose from the table. “Would you like to take home any of the leftover meat? It’d be good for sandwiches.”

“Sure, as long as nobody minds – you especially, Fakir.” Charon glanced over at him.

“Take as much as you want, I don’t mind.” Fakir shrugged. “I didn’t bring it home so it could go to waste, and I’d never have a problem sharing with you.”

“Now that’s something I really don’t ever want to see change.” Charon smiled fondly, even as he stood up to begin packing up some of the venison for himself. “You’ve a kind, generous nature under all that gruff and bluster – don’t ever lose that.”

“I…” Fakir went a little red, and something seemed to flash in his eyes for a moment before he looked down at his plate. “… I won’t.”

“Good, good.” Charon nodded approvingly.

Edel ended up slicing and packing up some meat for Charon, while he went back to the front hall and fetched the lantern he’d brought along. Once it was lit and the food he was taking home was ready for him, they all returned to the hall and waited while he put on his coat.

“You going to be all right heading home alone?” Fakir asked. “I can go with you if you want.”

“Nah, I’m fine. But thanks.” Charon picked up the bundle of food and his lantern from the table. “Thanks again for having me over for dinner – I owe you one, Edel.” He adjusted his grip on the lantern. “Maybe next weekend I’ll cook us all a nice lunch?”

“That sounds good.” Edel smiled. “Take care, and have a good night.”

“Same to you.” He nodded at her. “Goodnight Fakir, and you too, Ahiru. Take it easy, you two, and take good care of yourselves.”

“We will!” Ahiru nodded back. “And you too! Goodnight!”

“Yeah, don’t worry.” Fakir brushed some hair out of his eyes. “Night. See you on Monday, if I don’t stop by tomorrow.”

“Yeah, see you then.” Charon smiled. “Goodnight, everyone.”

He headed off into the night, the lantern swinging slowly in his hand, and Edel closed the door. “Would you two mind helping me clean up? I’m a bit tired to do it all myself.” She sighed.

“Of course I wouldn’t mind!” Ahiru shook her head. “You really should’ve let us help you cook it, though…”

“Yeah, I would’ve been happy to help,” Fakir said as he and Ahiru followed Edel back to the kitchen.

“I know you both wanted to, but it’s fine.” Edel started stacking plates atop one another and carried some away. “You’d had a long day already hunting the thing, Fakir, so I wanted you to relax. And you do enough to help me during the week, Ahiru.”

“I – I know, but still…” Ahiru frowned. “And you do enough for us all too! There’s no reason to shoulder it by yourself! You haven’t lived here alone for over a year…”

“I realize that. But… well, I guess old habits die hard.” Edel let out a wry laugh. “And it doesn’t help that I’ve got some sort of instinct to take care of you both… I never did want children of my own, but you seem to have become them anyway. And Fakir had a head start, being my nephew and all.”

“Then let us take care of you sometimes, in return,” Fakir said as he started heating some water for washing. “It’s the least we can do. We live here, we ought to help more.”

“You help plenty, don’t worry about that.” Edel shook her head. “I guess I’m just a bit stubborn sometimes, is all. But all right, next time I’ll let you both help me. Do we have a deal?”

“Yup!” Ahiru nodded, and smiled.

“… Yeah.” Fakir rolled up his sleeves. “Sounds fair.”

With all of them working together to clean up it got done with a fair amount of swiftness, considering how much there was to do. After finishing they all retired to their separate rooms for the evening, and barely two hours passed before all lights in the house went out.


	28. Chapter 28

Ahiru yawned and snuggled deeper into her blankets. She’d been awake for some time, but didn’t really want to actually get up. Everything was so comfortable, after all, warm and cozy and soft, and if she didn’t have anything to do today, why should she rush to leave her bed? It was so nice to just lie here under the covers, listening to the birds chirping merrily outside her window while the sunlight peeked in through the shutter. She didn’t get many mornings like this, and she wanted to enjoy it a little longer, at least until she became too hungry to stick around.

For today was October thirtieth, and in a lovely contrast with last year, Halloween looked to be completely uneventful. Without a royal wedding to attend and prepare for, there had been less to do overall this month, and things had been fairly quiet. Tomorrow looked to be much the same: everyone would be staying in and taking it easy, this household included, and Ahiru could look forward to a pleasant and relaxing evening at home. Today looked to be free too, as Mr. Katz had sent a letter yesterday informing her and Fakir that he’d caught a mild cold and, while it wasn’t something to worry over, would nevertheless keep him from holding their weekly tutoring session as he wanted to rest and not risk infecting them as well. So aside from maybe joining Edel on a few deliveries later, she really had nothing to do either today or tomorrow. It would be a good weekend.

Ahiru let herself lie about for a little while longer, and then finally sat up and opened her shutters. The sun had risen into a clear, mostly cloudless blue sky; it didn’t give much warmth to the crisp, cool air, but it did shine prettily on the brightly colored foliage. She also vividly remembered how unbearable that heat wave had been, so she didn’t miss the summer season at all. Autumn was in full, glorious swing, and she didn’t think she could possibly enjoy it any more than she already was.

She watched the birds gorge themselves from the bowl of seeds for a few minutes, and then dragged herself off the bed and went about getting herself ready for the day. She chose one of her warmer dresses, thinking that she might like a short stroll outside along the edge of the forest, and pinned her hair up in a braided bun. Ahiru smiled at her reflection, purely out of happiness over the relaxing few days she was about to have, and then bounced out of her room and into the kitchen.

She found Fakir alone there, having just fixed himself something from the breakfast spread laid out on the table. He looked up from the newspaper when she came in, and after a second’s pause greeted her. “Hey. The tea’s still hot, but Edel already left – said she wanted to get some deliveries done so that she could have the rest of the day free.”

“Oh, okay.” Ahiru walked over and poured herself some tea. “I was going to maybe go with her, but she didn’t know when she was going, I guess I got up too late.”

“You’re not that late.” Fakir shrugged. “She got up early – told me she couldn’t sleep and decided to just get up and get going. That has nothing to do with you.”

“Ohhhh, okay, that makes me feel better.” Ahiru spooned some honey into her tea. “I guess I just have to find something to do on my own, then… cause I don’t know when she’ll be back and she said we’re taking the day off otherwise and we’re not going to Mr. Katz for a lesson today…” She added a little cream to her tea as well. “What are you going to do? Go work at the forge?”

“I… actually, I was…” Fakir looked down at the table. “The thing is, I… I’m not… that is, we don’t know when the next time we’ll have fine weather like this will be, so…”

“Huh?” Ahiru tilted her head and stared at him. “What are you talking about?”

“I – I’m getting to that!” Fakir’s cheeks turned red. “I – I’m… what I’m trying to say is… would you want to go for a ride, or something? We could… we could even take some food with us, and… have a sort of picnic. If – if you want.” He fixed his gaze on the wall behind her. “You don’t have to if there’s something you’d rather do, though… I understand.”

“Wh-what? Oh, Fakir, no – don’t be silly!” Ahiru shook her head, her eyes wide. “That – that sounds wonderful, I’d love to do that!” She bounced a little in her chair and then forced herself to sit still. “We haven’t been able to go riding much, and like you said we don’t know when the weather’s going to be this nice again, especially cause it’s so late in the year and there’s not that much of autumn left and… and yeah.”

“Yeah.” Fakir’s gaze dropped back down to the table. “There’s not much… we should take advantage of the time we have to enjoy ourselves, since things will change soon.”

“Yup, exactly!” Ahiru tried not to wiggle around in her seat anymore, excited though she was, and focused on filling her plate with food. “So, after we finish eating breakfast and cleaning up and everything we’ll get packed up and go?”

“That’s what I was thinking, yeah.” Fakir nodded. “There’s plenty of baskets left here that we can use to take our food in, as well as a blanket to spread, and that can easily be attached to Asim while we ride – we don’t need to take the cart or anything. I know a good place to go, and since we have all day we can take our time and not have to hurry back.”

“Yeah!” Ahiru beamed. “Oh, this’ll be so fun!”

Fakir smiled. “I hope so.”

“Of course it will be! I always have fun with you!” Ahiru blushed and nodded. “You don’t have to worry about that! I love doing stuff together!”

His smile seemed to freeze for a moment, but then looked normal again so quickly that it seemed to have been her imagination. “All right. I’ll try not to worry, then.”

They talked a little about their plans as they finished breakfast, and agreed that they should leave a note for Edel telling her where they were going, as it looked likely that she’d get home before they did. After they’d got done eating and cleaning up Ahiru fetched a basket and a clean blanket while Fakir assembled some food they could easily take and eat as a light lunch somewhere – mostly cheese and bread and fruit, and some cold cuts and sausages, along with a bit of leftover apple strudel and a bottle of cider. Cloth napkins and some cutlery were included too, and once the basket was all packed up with everything they’d need and the note written for Edel it was off to the front hall to put on their cloaks and gloves and scarves before leaving.

Ahiru wanted to skip all the way up the path to Charon’s stable, but restrained herself and walked normally beside Fakir, who as usual matched his pace to hers. She’d never asked him about that, or said anything at all, in fact – hopefully he wouldn’t think she was ungrateful or anything when the opposite was true. She was extremely thankful for his kindness in doing that, it was just that she couldn’t get past the awkwardness she felt when she thought about actually bringing it up long enough to say anything. After all, what if it wasn’t a conscious effort? What if it made him feel self-conscious and he stopped? She didn’t want to put him on the spot or embarrass one or both of them.

When they got to the stable, something caught Ahiru’s eye as Fakir prepared Asim to go riding and attached the basket to his saddle: the stool, sitting off in the corner. It usually wasn’t there, so they’d long since gotten into a habit of him lifting her onto Asim’s back. Should she say anything about it being there now? Ahiru wavered over it so long that she had to hurry and catch up as Fakir led Asim out of the stable. Fakir didn’t seem to have noticed the stool’s presence, so she decided not to tell him, and let him lift her by the waist as usual to settle herself into the saddle before he swung up behind her. It was possible that using the stool would’ve been easier… but then again, she was more or less used to the way they did things (barring her physical reaction to having Fakir’s hands on her like that), and it was rather pleasant besides, so it didn’t seem necessary to mention. He clearly didn’t have a problem with it either, having long ago stopped bothering to even check for a stool when they got there. No wonder he hadn’t seen it today, the one time it actually _was_ there.

They rode as they always did, with his arm looped around her waist to hold her close while he controlled the reins in his other hand, and Ahiru found herself fully relaxing and reclining against him. It truly was such a beautiful day, and the prospect of spending so much of it alone with Fakir had her feeling almost euphoric. She kept swinging back and forth between two impulses: one was to bounce all over the place in her excitement, and the other was to sink into a quiet, wholly contented state and simply snuggle up to him and not really move. They’d been spending a lot of time together lately, true enough, but something about today felt different somehow. Maybe… just maybe… today was the day. The day she’d finally find her courage and tell him how she _really_ felt. It was something she’d been toying with for weeks now, after hearing the things that Nan Geiszler, Edel, and Malen said that day at market. The only thing really holding her back was that Fakir didn’t seem to be any closer to being ready to find a place of his own to live yet, and she didn’t want to rush him out of Edel’s house by making it awkward for him to be around her. He also appeared to be an odd mood sometimes lately, and it never seemed to be the right time to confess. But perhaps today her chance would arrive.

They rode for some time through the outskirts of the forest, Fakir careful to keep Asim at a slow and steady pace, and steering him around any trouble spots where a hidden obstacle might get all of them hurt. At last, though, they emerged into a beautiful, flower-strewn meadow beside a babbling brook, with a single oak tree towering over them and providing shade even across the water. Ahiru let out a little gasp of delight at how pretty it all was, and she felt Fakir’s chest rumble with a slight laugh. “You like it, then?”

“Of course I do!” She turned slightly in the saddle and craned her neck to see him better. “It’s so pretty! Oh, Fakir, thanks for bringing me here, I love it!”

Fakir smiled. “I’m glad.” He let go of her and, once he was assured she was secure enough, swung himself down from Asim before helping her to the ground as well. “I thought a lot about where we might go, and I remembered this place… I don’t come here often, but I figured you might like it.”

“I really do. It’s beautiful…” Ahiru walked away from him, in the direction of the brook, not sure what to look at first as her gaze flitted around. The water flowing by was so clear, sparkling in the sun like liquid diamonds, and the wildflowers and fallen leaves added streaks and spots of gorgeous color. A vision floated briefly across the surface of her mind – of the two of them spread out on a blanket, making love on a just-warm-enough spring day – but she quickly dismissed it, feeling her cheeks heat up. As if _that_ would ever happen! “I definitely want to come here again sometime!”

“Then you should.” Fakir cleared his throat. “What do you want to do now? Wander around a bit? Or do you want to set things up before that?”

“I don’t know… should we at least lay down the blanket and then let Asim wander?” Ahiru turned back to look at him. “It might be easier if we just took the basket off him, even if we don’t get all set up.”

“Yeah, I was going to do that anyway.” Fakir set about untying the basket from the saddle. “I’ll take care of him, you go ahead and look around.”

“Okay!” She practically skipped over to the edge of the brook and knelt down beside it. After a moment of consideration she pulled off her gloves, and bravely stuck her fingers into the water. As she’d suspected it would be, it felt like ice against her skin, even in the sun, and she shivered. There was something refreshing about it, though, and she could just imagine how lovely it’d be to come here in the summer and stick her toes in it to cool off. She didn’t know that she’d want to visit this place alone, given how far away it was and that the path to reach it passed through the forest, but she doubted she’d have a hard time convincing Fakir to come along with her, especially on their days off.

Her next destination was the oak tree. It looked ancient, and its height was such that it hurt her neck to try and look up at the top. Staring up at it made her eyes water and see spots, too, for the sun had risen enough by now to be shining right in her face. She settled instead for walking around it, picking her way among the roots and examining the bark. There was one spot in particular where it almost looked like a person’s face; as she peered at it, attempting to make out the features, Fakir wandered up to stand at her side. “Is something there?”

“No, not really… I mean…” Ahiru leaned closer. “It kind of looks like a face, don’t you think? But I know it’s not really, it’s just the way the bark happens to be in this spot.”

“Hmmm…” Fakir studied it. “It could be. But it also might really be a face.”

“Wh-what?” Ahiru sprang back, and nearly collided with him; he caught her shoulders and steadied her. “H-how could that be?”

“Well, it could just be legend, but…” She glanced over her shoulder at him, and saw him frown. “There are stories about people angering the fairies and getting turned into trees… and other tales say that if a person dies at the hands of the Fair Folk their soul cannot pass on and rest, but instead is drawn into the forest and becomes part of it. Just like this.” He let go of her and touched the tree trunk, just beside where the face seemed to be. “So maybe this is some unfortunate lost soul.”

“Oh no… oh no… don’t say that…” Ahiru shook her head and made a small whimpering noise. “That’s too sad… I can’t bear to think about something like that happening to anyone…”

“… Sorry.” Fakir stepped back, and turned away. “Let’s… go set up the blanket, then, and talk about something else.”

“Yeah, good idea…” Ahiru followed him as he walked over to where he’d left the basket they’d brought along. A little ways away, Asim nibbled on some grass. “Don’t – don’t worry, though, I still like this place and I’m glad we came here today, and I’m still having fun… please don’t feel like you ruined it for me!”

“… All right.” Fakir knelt down by the basket. “I’m… glad I didn’t spoil it for you, at least… but still, I shouldn’t have…”

“Fakir, it’s okay.” Ahiru dropped to her knees beside him, and laid her hand on his arm; he seemed to jump slightly at her touch. “You tell me stories about fairy stuff all the time, this really wasn’t any different, and I’m not upset. Please don’t be sad, okay? I’m having fun with you.”

“I…” Fakir’s gaze found hers, the look in them indecipherable for a moment before he nodded. “All right. But I’m going to be more careful now.” He smiled, though it seemed sad. “I don’t want to do anything to ruin this.”

“You won’t!” Ahiru squeezed his arm, and then let go and turned away so that she could pick up the blanket they’d brought along. She and Fakir both stood, took one end of the blanket each, and carefully spread it out on the ground, weighting it down in the middle with the well-laden basket once it had been done to their satisfaction. Ahiru then took Fakir’s hand in hers, and smiled up at him even as a fresh blush warmed her face. “Come on, let’s walk around some more a-and have fun. Don’t worry so much.”

“All right.” He smiled again, and she couldn’t shake the feeling that once again there was a hidden sadness lurking in his eyes. “Sounds good.”

They whiled away a significant amount of time just wandering and looking around; Fakir showed her things that he remembered from his previous visits, and they discovered new things as well. They watched fish swimming by in the brook, skipped stones in the water, and inspected the toadstools that grew there. Fakir made up stories about tiny people living in houses carved into the inside of the toadstools, which made Ahiru giggle and declare that he should do _that_ for a living, or at least on the side, because he was creative and good at telling tales. Fakir paused at that, and said after a beat that he’d consider it.

When Fakir left her side for a few minutes to see how Asim was doing and make sure he didn’t wander too far, Ahiru took to picking wildflowers. She soon had two handfuls of them, so abundant were they in this place, and as she stared down at them an idea popped into her head. A moment’s consideration was more than what she needed, so she bounced back over to the blanket and sat down on the edge, where she began to carefully braid the flowers together by their stems. She glanced up only when Fakir’s shadow fell over her. “Oh! Fakir! Look!”

“At the flowers?” Fakir sat down beside her, so close that his arm brushed hers, making her shiver a little. “What are you doing with them?”

“Making flower crowns!” Ahiru beamed at him. “Will – will you wear one when I’m done? Just – just here, though,” she added.” You don’t have to wear it in front of anyone else, I just… thought it might be fun to make them right now while we’re here, and that it wouldn’t be fair to just make myself one and leave you out, but now that I say it I realized that you probably don’t want to and that’s okay, I understand, I just… I just thought I’d ask, don’t feel like you have to say yes…”

“No, I… I mean, I will.” Fakir shook his head. “I don’t mind doing that. If you’re going to go to all that trouble, I’m not going to say no.”

“Well, it – it’s not _that_ much trouble, but…” Ahiru ducked her head and hunched her shoulders. “Th-thank you anyway…”

“Of course.” Fakir brushed some hair out of his eyes. “Don’t worry about it. We’re here to have fun, right? I have no intention of spoiling it for you in any way.”

“That… that’s cause…” Ahiru blinked, and tried to swallow past the lump that had suddenly formed in her throat. “You’re so kind… you might not think so, but I know you are…”

“I… well…” Fakir looked away. “I just… want you to be happy, is all. Because you deserve it.”

“I am.” Ahiru’s heart swelled as she looked at him, her fingers stilling on the flowers. “Just being here with you makes me happy, just spending time with you makes me happy. I…” She swallowed. “Um, Fakir, I…”

“Yeah?” He turned back to look at her. “What is it? Is something wrong?”

“N-no, I just…” Ahiru let her breath out. “I, um… I’m done with yours.” She held out the completed flower crown. “Do you want to put it on now?”

“Yeah.” He took it from her, their fingers brushing, and set it carefully atop his head. “Thanks… how’s it look?”

“It looks really nice.” Ahiru smiled despite herself. “Th-thank you again for wearing it… I know you probably feel silly…”

“Not at all.” Fakir smiled back at her. “Don’t worry about that, all right?”

“O-okay, I’ll try.” Ahiru let her gaze drop down, and she focused on making her own little circlet of flowers, even as her heart sank with disappointment. Somehow, having him look right at her had made her lose her nerve, and she wasn’t sure she could get it back before they went home. There would always be another chance, of course, some other day, but all the same it was frustrating that she couldn’t say it on _this_ day.

Three words. Just three small words. They should be so simple to say, right? None of them difficult to pronounce, none of them very long. But every time she tried her throat seemed to close up, and her voice went into hibernation until she’d decided on something else entirely different to talk about. It was getting to the point where she was afraid she’d never be able to say it, and really would spend the rest of her life wondering what might have been. Of course, given how young she was – not even twenty! – that seemed a bit overdramatic and ridiculous once she stopped to think rationally about it. In these ruined moments, though, rational thought was hard to come by, and she had to remind herself of that fact instead of beating herself up for her fright and loss of nerve.

She shook such thoughts out of her head, and concentrated on braiding the flowers together. Fakir sat beside her as she worked, though she didn’t know if he was watching her or staring at something else. It should’ve made her nervous to have him so close, and in some ways it kind of did, but it also made her feel content and relaxed. He was so comfortable sitting close to her like this, he had to be or he wouldn’t have done so at all, and wouldn’t stay there if there was no need to. Even if he didn’t love her back, just that fact, that change in their relationship, that was enough to bring her happiness. Just his presence made her feel good in ways she couldn’t put into words. If only she dared move a little closer and lean her head on his shoulder… if only he’d put his arm around her and hold her… her list of “if onlys” was so long, and getting longer by the day. When she finally did tell him she loved him, it would be because she couldn’t hold the words back anymore.

It took a few more minutes of work, but at last she finished her flower crown and set it atop her head. “There!” She turned to Fakir. “Does – does it look okay? Or silly?”

“It… you look…” He paused, and she could see the beginnings of a blush forming on his face as he swallowed. “You… look pretty.”

“I -! Oh, oh… no, I… no I don’t… I mean, I mean…” Ahiru’s hands crept up to cover her cheeks, her eyes wide. “I – I don’t think so, but… but thank you… sorry… I don’t mean to be rude just… I didn’t expect that and you really don’t have to say that to be nice, just… oh…”

“I didn’t – I wouldn’t – I…” Fakir let his breath out and looked away, and she saw that his ear had turned red too. “… You’re welcome.”

“Th-thanks… I mean, um, I mean, um… I already said that… oh, um… um…” Ahiru twisted her hands together where they now lay in her lap. “Do – do you want lunch?”

“I, uh… yeah.” Fakir took a breath and let it out. “Yeah, all right… I’ll go unpack everything.”

“O-okay… thanks…” Ahiru stared down at her hands, not daring to turn around just yet even as Fakir got up and moved to the center of the basket to take out the food they’d brought. She was still warm all over, her heart racing and a funny feeling in her stomach. Not a bad sort of funny, just… well, she hadn’t been expecting _that_. He always just said she looked fine, or stuff along those lines, when he said anything at all… never once had he said she was _pretty_. In fact, as a general rule _nobody_ tended to tell her that. But _Fakir_ had said it, and he seemed to mean it, and she didn’t know how to feel or react.

After a minute or two she recovered enough to turn around, and moved to help him take the food out. They talked about this and that while they unpacked everything and started to eat, none of it related to what had just happened, and she slowly started to feel at ease again. Her mind couldn’t help but wander back over and over to his unexpected compliment, however. Had he meant it? He wasn’t the type of person to say something untrue just to be polite, she knew that. And more than that, it begged the question: what kind of girls did he like? She knew what kind of guys he liked, or at least the one in particular, but not what kind of girls. He’d said he was attracted to women _and_ men, but had only told her about the one man he’d loved, not any women, so she couldn’t help but curious about what kind of women he liked. Maybe someday she’d be brave enough to ask, under the guise of comparing notes and seeing what he liked versus what she liked.

“What do you want to do now?” Fakir asked as they sat back at the conclusion of their meal. “Do you want to go back, or stay out here longer?”

“I don’t want to go back yet!” Ahiru shook her head. “I want to stay here… maybe we could take a little walk or something? Or ride around a little bit? We don’t have to be back at a certain time, so we can stay as long as we want.”

“True.” Fakir wiped his hands and his mouth with a napkin. “We should get back before dark, though.”

“Oh yeah… but, but we have plenty of time before then!” Ahiru took one last sip of cider from her cup. “Let’s stay out longer, if you don’t mind. Please?”

“I don’t mind at all.” Fakir smiled softly. “Let’s clean up, and then we’ll fetch Asim and walk him along with us before we do some more riding.”

“Okay!”

Ahiru helped him pack everything back into the basket, including the blanket, and then they went over to where Asim was taking a drink from the brook. Fakir tied the basket onto the saddle again, and then took the reins and led Asim off through the meadow. Ahiru walked beside him, and they wandered for a while along the edge of the brook, weaving among trees and rocks and careful not to trample any toadstools. Ahiru picked a few more flowers, and with Fakir’s consent stuck one into the top buttonhole of his shirt. He, in turn, took one from her hand and stuck it into her hair behind her ear, making her giggle. The rest she carried along with her as they kept going, feeling almost as though she were passing through a dream. The landscape around them felt almost unreal in its beauty, and her happiness at sharing something so simple and yet so wonderful with Fakir filled her heart to the brim with joy. This was a day she’d _never_ forget.

When at last they tired of walking, Fakir lifted her onto Asim and climbed up behind her, and they began to ride around. Ahiru settled back into the saddle, reclining against Fakir with the ease borne of a year of knowing him, and let out a little sigh. “Remember when we first went riding together? Well, I mean… I guess it wasn’t really like this and we didn’t set out to… but technically it was our first time…”

“Yeah.” Fakir laughed slightly. “I remember. We met at the well… you’d come to pick roses.”

“Yeah!” Ahiru nodded. “Edel had asked me to get some orange roses while she did some stuff at home, we were so busy getting ready for the wedding… so I walked all that way and it was kind of scary but then I finally got to the well and it was so pretty like I remembered… and you were there! Although I didn’t see you at first…” She turned her head a little, trying to see his face. “Do you still go there to think?”

“Sometimes.” He tugged on the reins to lead Asim around a tree stump. “I haven’t been back for a while, though.”

“I don’t go by myself anymore.” Ahiru settled back against him. “Not since that one day after the naming ceremony… it’s just too scary. I’ve gone in the forest after that, but only with you or Edel.” She shivered, and his arm seemed to tighten a little around her waist.

“I don’t blame you. I’ve been wary ever since that day too.” Fakir steered Asim around a fallen branch. “I’d rather not go in if I don’t have to… so I haven’t been back to that well since before then.”

“Oh, that’s too bad, cause I know you liked it a lot.” Ahiru looked down at the flowers in her hand. “Maybe we should go together soon, I’ll pick some roses or something and we can just relax.”

“… Yeah. Maybe.”

They rode along quietly for a while after that, just enjoying the scenery around them and each other’s company. Ahiru found herself wishing the day would never end, but at some point it had to, and as the sun started to sink lower Fakir began to steer them towards home. A sort of ache took up residence in her chest as they returned Asim to Charon’s stable, and her good mood veered into melancholy, though she didn’t know why. When they got back to the house they found a note from Edel beside theirs, saying that she was spending the night at Ebine’s and would be back tomorrow morning; they tossed both into the waste bin and set about cleaning up the things they’d taken with them to the meadow. Fakir built up a fire in the hearth and lit lamps, and Ahiru put the little bouquet of flowers into a jar of water.

“What are you going to do now?” Fakir asked as he put the last dry dish away. They’d just finished eating and had done a second round of cleaning.

“Hmmm… I don’t know.” Ahiru pondered it. “I kind of want to go read in the library for a while… you can join me, if you want.”

“I wouldn’t be bothering you?” He took the damp towel she held and hung it up to dry.

“Not at all!” Ahiru shook her head. “Do – do you want to read with me?”

“Yeah.” Fakir nodded. “That sounds good.”

They headed to the library, where they lit a fire in that fireplace and settled into armchairs near each other to read. Ahiru stole glances at Fakir whenever she could, and more than once looked up when she thought she felt his gaze on her. He always had his eyes on his book whenever she did, though, so she chalked it up to being just her imagination. Besides, what reason did he have to look at her anyway? The melancholy from earlier stole back, stronger than ever, and after a while she found it impossible to concentrate on her book. Something in her stomach didn’t feel right, she felt close to tears, and her heart was… well, it wasn’t racing, but it didn’t feel like it was going at its normal pace either. The thought of this lovely day ending was an awful one, and she tried not to dwell on it.

By and by, though, it became impossible to avoid. Her eyes started to fall, and her yawns grew more frequent, and her head started to droop onto her chest as she stared down at her book, not really seeing the words. She drifted off without knowing it, and only blearily came back into a fuzzy sort of semi-consciousness when Fakir touched her cheek. “Hey. Ahiru.”

“Wh-what?” She blinked up at him. “F-Fakir? What’s…”

“You’re falling asleep.” He looked gently amused. “I… think you should go to bed.”

“I… I don’t want to,” she protested, even as she let him take her book from her and help her up. “I want to stay… I don’t want today to…” She swayed on her feet and yawned. “To end…”

“… I know.” Fakir’s voice became quieter, and he looked away for a moment. “But… there’s nothing we can do about it, and if you’re this tired there’s no use fighting it.”

“I – I know.” Ahiru sighed. Fakir took her hand, and she allowed him to lead her out of the library and towards her room. “I’m sorry… I wanted to stay up later…”

“It’s all right.” Fakir took a breath and let it out. “You can’t help being exhausted. We were out a long time today.”

“That’s true.” They stopped in front of her door, and Ahiru rubbed at her eyes. “We should… do something tomorrow too. If – if you want.”

“… Yeah. I… I do want that.” Fakir’s voice sounded scratchy, and he cleared his throat. “Anyway… go ahead and go to bed, I’ll take care of the lamps in the library. I’ll… probably go to bed myself after I do that.”

“Okay.” Ahiru yawned again. “Thanks.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Fakir squeezed her hand, and then let go. “Goodnight, Ahiru.”

“Night, Fakir.” Ahiru smiled sleepily up at him. “Thanks for a really great day. I…” Another yawn bubbled up, but she suppressed it. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“… Yeah. Night.”

Ahiru went into her room and closed the door, but didn’t walk away just yet; she listened to his footsteps as he headed back to the library. There was a strange moment where he seemed to stop for several seconds before he kept going, but she didn’t think anything of it and went about her own business. She lit a small fire in her hearth for warmth and light, and since it was just enough to see by she didn’t bother with a lamp. She changed into her nightgown and took down her hair for brushing and rebraiding, and was so tired by the time she was done that she could barely move. Her sadness over the wonderful day coming to an end still pricked at her heart, but it didn’t prevent her from falling asleep soon after she finally laid down and pulled the covers up to her chin.

 A few hours later she drifted back into wakefulness. The fire in her hearth was still smoldering, and she realized as her eyes adjusted to the darkness that she’d left her curtains open, allowing some moonlight to poke through the shutters and shine on her face. Ahiru sighed; she knew she should sit up and pull them closed, but she didn’t quite feel like it. Instead she took a deep breath, inhaling the faint scent of flowers, and stared up at her ceiling as she listened to the night birds outside calling mournfully to each other.

Just as she started to feel sleepy again, a very different noise caught her attention and made her eyes open wide: the sound of Fakir’s door opening. As she listened, he closed it very slowly and quietly, as if trying not to make noise. He walked very quietly too, and seemed to pause for a moment in front of her door, but then went on past it towards the kitchen. Ahiru sat up, her heart racing; it wouldn’t be unusual for him to try and muffle the sounds he was making so as not to wake her up if he just wanted to get a drink of water in the middle of the night, but something inside her was screaming that this was wrong somehow. She strained her ears, listening as well as she could and ignoring other noises, and heard him enter the kitchen. But there were no sounds indicating that he was doing anything in there, instead the next thing she heard was the sound of the back door opening and closing. Ahiru scrambled onto her knees and fumbled with her shutter, trying to get it open as quickly as possible. And through her screen she saw Fakir, walking in the light of the full moon towards the forest.

She moved lightning fast, sliding her feet into her slippers and grabbing her robe from a chair as she ran. How she didn’t trip and fall in her headlong flight out of her room and into the chilly night she didn’t know, but Ahiru somehow made it, struggling to pull on her robe as she sprinted in the direction Fakir was going. Her slippers, intended for indoor use only, would be ruined, but she didn’t care. All she cared about was getting to Fakir and finding out what in the world he was doing. He had a head start, but she could see by the light of the moon, and he also had a small lantern with him that flickered and showed his position even from a distance.

“Fakir!” she called out. He didn’t seem to hear her, though – he kept on walking without turning around, and did nothing to adjust his pace. So Ahiru quickened hers, and when she trod on a twig and broke it Fakir’s attention was finally caught. He looked over his shoulder and saw her moving towards him, and in the moonlight it seemed as though his expression became one of horror. He turned back around and began to walk faster, trying to lose her in the woods. “No! Fakir, no… wait…” Ahiru broke into a run, dodging around trees and stumps and hopping over fallen branches. “Please… wait…”

“Go home, Ahiru!” he shouted back to her. “Just go to bed. You shouldn’t be out here.”

“No! You… you have to tell me…” She nearly slipped and fell in a patch of mud, but somehow kept herself upright, though she lost a slipper. “What are you doing? You shouldn’t be out here either, why are you going into the woods in the middle of the night?”

“It’s not your concern!”

“Yes it _is!_ ” Despite that she only had one slipper on, Ahiru was still running, and somehow managed to push herself to go a little faster. Oh, if only he would stop and talk to her! “Why are you doing this, what are you doing… where are you going? Please, tell me!”

He didn’t answer, but his pace did slow, enough that Ahiru found a second wind, and pushed herself even harder. Before too long she was only a few steps behind him, and as she dragged herself along, trying to catch her breath and slow down her pounding heart, Fakir stopped walking and finally spoke. “I’m going to die.”

Time seemed to freeze; Ahiru found herself unable to move or breathe in the wake of Fakir’s words, her brain jamming up and her whole body going cold with terror. It felt like an eternity passed before she could manage to speak . “Wh-wh- _what?_ No! What… what do you mean, no, you can’t, you can’t, what… what…” In spite of her aching limbs, she forced herself to hurry after him as he started walking again. “Fakir, please… please explain! Tell me you don’t really mean that… not like _that_ … please…”

“I do.” His voice was so soft she could barely hear it. “I’m sorry. But I have to.”

“But _why?_ ” Ahiru somehow found it in herself to make it to his side, helped along by the fact that he wasn’t walking very fast right now. “This… this doesn’t make any _sense_ , you… you have to tell me why! Please?”

“I…” Fakir drew a deep breath and let it out. “I don’t… I don’t even know where to begin…”

“Start _somewhere_ , then. Anywhere.” She could still barely breathe, and her heart hadn’t slowed down at all. “Please… _please,_ Fakir…”

“I…” He fell silent and increased his pace slightly. Ahiru struggled to keep up with him on her shorter and now sore legs and once or twice dropped behind a bit, but he never got too far ahead of her. His lantern flickered and guttered, leaving them in the dark save for what moonlight poked in through the trees, and the longer he kept quiet the more her panic grew. Finally, though, a little ways outside what looked to be a small clearing, he stopped and turned to face her. He opened his mouth as if to speak but then closed it, staring down at her with a conflicted expression on his face.

“Fakir… Fakir, please…” Ahiru took a tentative step towards him, and laid her hand on his arm. “Please tell me… _please_ …”

“I…” He sighed. “I’m not… really supposed to, but I guess… I guess it couldn’t do any harm, as it’s too late now anyway.” He set his lantern on the ground. “I… suppose it begins, in a way, in midsummer of last year, when Prince Siegfried wandered into the fairy realm and fell in love with its princess.”

“With…” Ahiru’s mouth fell open. “Rue… Rue’s a…”

“Sort of.” Fakir pushed some hair out of his eyes. He had, she saw now, taken off the flower crown she’d made him, but he was still dressed in the clothes he’d worn all day and had left the single flower she’d plucked in that top buttonhole. “Do you remember the story I told you, that day we first really spoke at the house? About the child from a noble family given to the Fairy King to secure the treaty over the forest borders? It’s not just a changeling story tacked on later, like Edel thinks – it really happened. And Rue was that child.”

“She – but… but that happened…” Ahiru’s voice trailed off. “Oh… oh yeah… time passes differently there, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah.” Fakir nodded. “She was handed over as an infant and never knew her birth parents. Instead, the Fairy King raised her to adulthood within his realm, and while he did generation upon generation passed by out here. She knew nothing of the human world, until the fateful day when one of royal blood stumbled into a fairy ring and encountered her.”

Rue… a fairy princess of sorts… “But… but what does that have to do with you?”

“Because I was with him at the time.” Fakir exhaled slowly. “We’d gotten separated from the rest of the hunting party, and when he unwittingly walked into the fairy ring I followed him, because I took my duty to protect him very seriously. I couldn’t convince him to leave before it was too late, though… before he’d met Rue and they’d fallen in love. At that point the only voice he would listen to was hers, and she told him that they should speak to her father about permission to marry, for it would go badly for them indeed if they simply ran away together.” His jaw tightened. “Not that it went very well _anyway_...”

“Oh no…” Ahiru whispered. “What happened?”

“Well, as I think I mentioned to you that day last year, the Fairy King isn’t fond of losing anything that he feels belongs to him. And that includes people.” A look of disgust filled Fakir’s eyes. “He saw Rue as his property, and so he set a steep price for releasing her into the human world: Siegfried could marry her, but the marriage would take place on Halloween – the fairies’ New Year – and on the following Halloween, after one year had passed, he would return to the fairy realm and give up his life.”

“Wh-what?” Ahiru’s eyes went wide again. “Th-that’s horrible…” She paused. “But – but wait… if he’s… then why are you – oh no…”

“Yeah.” Fakir sighed. “I… volunteered to die in his place. Because…” He swallowed. “Ahiru, he… Siegfried… he’s the man I told you about. The man I fell in love with, who left me because I couldn’t provide him with children to secure the principality’s future.”

“I… I know.” Ahiru looked down, her face burning. “I’m sorry… I… I accidentally overheard you two talking the day of the naming ceremony… I didn’t mean to, but it was still wrong… I’m sorry…”

“It’s all right.” Fakir shook his head. “I’m not angry at you.” He sighed again. “But now you understand… when I heard the Fairy King say that, it – I just… I reacted so swiftly I barely thought about it. I loved Siegfried, so I couldn’t bear to see him die. And I also felt like… like I had to protect him from his own foolishness.” He sighed. “I mean… he broke things off with me because I couldn’t give him an heir, and he’s been under pressure from his mother for _years_ to marry and produce one. Especially a male heir, as that would enable the Weiss name to be carried on.” He rolled his eyes. “But he was willing to toss all that aside and risk leaving the land without any heir at all if he and Rue couldn’t conceive a child before he died the following year, risk having the country torn apart by nobles fighting amongst themselves for the throne? I couldn’t let that stand.”

“And… and that’s why you don’t like Rue, isn’t it?” Ahiru peered up at him. “Cause he was willing to do that for her and not you?”

“… Partly, yeah.” Shame crept into his expression. “Part of me couldn’t understand what it was about her that made it so easy for Siegfried to say that yes, he’d give up his life next year, regardless of whether or not they’d produced a child by then, never mind all the pressure from his mother to marry and make heirs. I couldn’t understand what it was I lacked that he wasn’t willing to live with me, that he’d rather die for her… and that’s part of what twisted my ideas on love, to believe that self-sacrificial love was the greatest of all.”

“Oh… like we talked about with Mr. Katz…” Ahiru swallowed.

“Yeah. I mean… I already had those ideas in my mind, but that cemented it like nothing else. Siegfried wasn’t interested in living with me, but with Rue he loved her enough to die for her. I could only conclude that I was lacking something, and I resented her for having whatever it was that I didn’t. I also didn’t entirely trust her, I thought she might do something to harm him and I feared her love wasn’t genuine. She’s human, yes, but… she’d lived in the fairy realm so long that I didn’t know how much of it had seeped into her.” Fakir brushed a hair out of his eye. “The way she acted towards me didn’t help either.”

“What do you mean?” Ahiru frowned. “Did she dislike you for some reason? Did… did she suspect how you felt about Siegfried?”

“Yes.” Fakir nodded. “Somehow, she saw what he didn’t – even after I’d volunteered to pay the price for him and die in his place, he still believed my words about it being out of knightly duty and devotion, and didn’t suspect that I still held onto my romantic feelings for him. Rue, though – Rue was much more savvy. And so the first chance she got to speak to me alone, she confronted me. She told me that she hated being indebted to another as a general rule, but she hated it even more when it was to someone who might try to take advantage of that debt for their personal gain. Namely, she felt that I was likely to attempt to come between her and Siegfried by cashing in on his gratitude to me for stepping up to take his place.”

“But you would never!” Ahiru burst out. “You’re not that kind of person! No matter how you felt about him, no matter how much you hated her, you’d never do something like that…”

“You can say that because you know me.” Fakir smiled, though it was a sad and tired smile. “She didn’t. And she still doesn’t, not really, not the way you do.” He paused for a moment. “So, we… had it out. I managed to convince her in the end, I think, that she was being absurd, but I couldn’t get her to stop feeling like she was indebted to me. She can’t abide that – she chafes against it. Couple that with my stubborn refusal to try and get out of it, and you have an easy recipe for more animosity on her part. And for _my_ part I was still hung up on jealousy and resentment and fear for Siegfried’s safety, so it’s no wonder we didn’t get along.” He sighed. “I had yet to realize that I was misdirecting my hate – or maybe it’s that it seemed safer to pour all my negative feelings onto her, simply because the real villain, the Fairy King, scared me so much. I let my fear of him warp me a bit, and I’m not proud of it.”

“Do you still hate her, then?” Ahiru asked. Her stomach had started churning partway through the explanation and hadn’t stopped; she felt like she might throw up her dinner at any moment.

“No.” He shook his head. “I still can’t say that I like her, and I don’t know if we ever could’ve gotten along, simply because we seem to naturally clash… but I don’t hate her anymore. I’ve… come to realize that… that the real villain here was always the Fairy King, like I said, and that… well, I’ve come to terms with her being with Siegfried.”

“Okay… but…” Ahiru took a shaky breath. “You… you said you refused to try and get out of this… why? Why can’t you just run away, to a city or something where the fairies don’t go anymore? There has to be somewhere safe where you can go, you don’t have to do this!” Her voice broke.

“Yes, I do.” Fakir shook his head as she opened her mouth to speak again. “There’s no way out of this, not if I don’t want anyone else to get hurt. I could try running away, but… the Fairy King would exact his retribution against everyone I care about.” Something passed over his face that she couldn’t read. “Do you remember that night last November? I’d just been brought in that day after getting injured during the hunt, and you came into my room because you thought you’d heard me talking to someone. Remember?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “But… but you told me that I was dreaming, or – or that I’d heard someone outside…”

“I lied to you. I’m sorry.” Fakir closed his eyes for a moment and sighed. “It _was_ me talking to someone. And that someone… was the Fairy King. Who, by the way, we met outside the castle the day of the naming ceremony.”

“Wh-what?” Ahiru’s eyes widened in horror. “That… that was…”

“Yeah.” Fakir nodded. “That was him. He confronted me after the attack in November. It was only through his intervention, you see, that I survived that at all – if it hadn’t been for him, those shallow wounds would’ve been deeper, and I might have died right then. But that wasn’t acceptable to him. I needed to die when I’d agreed to, Halloween night of this year. So he protected me, and then showed up in the middle of the night to warn me that if I tried to defy him in any way, including killing myself before the year was up, he would visit terrible consequences onto those I care about. I can’t let him do that.” Fakir’s voice shook a little. “So I… I have to go.”

“No…” Ahiru whispered, tears filling her eyes. “No… please no… please don’t… there has to be some other way, there just _has_ to be…”

“There isn’t.” Fakir turned his head away, casting his face into shadow, but before his expression was obscured she got a glimpse of how anguished it was, and her heart cracked at the sight. “I have no way out of this, not if I want to keep everyone I know safe. I have to go into the fairy realm now, like I promised. And then tomorrow at midnight… I’ll die.”

“No!” Ahiru clapped her hands to her mouth as the tears streamed forth. “No, please… Fakir… please don’t, please don’t… I don’t… I don’t want to lose you… _please_ …”

“… I’m sorry.” A moment passed while Ahiru cried noisily into the sleeve of her robe, and then Fakir stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into a hug. She started in surprise and then pressed herself closer, squashing her face against his chest as she sobbed. “I’m so sorry, Ahiru… I didn’t… I never wanted to hurt you…” His voice was hoarse. “I’m sorry. I really am. But I have to go.”

“No… no you don’t…” Ahiru whimpered, her whole body trembling. “ _Please_ … please stay… I… we’ll find a way…”

“I wish I could. Believe me.” He sounded like he was fighting off tears of his own, and he seemed to be shaking as badly as she was, though it was hard to tell. “But I don’t have a choice… not if I want…” He sighed into her hair. “I’m sorry.” He held her for a minute more, and then pressed a small kiss to the top of her head. “Goodbye, Ahiru. I’m glad I got to meet you.” Letting go of her, he turned and ran into the clearing.

“No!” Ahiru took off after him, her vision blurred by tears. “Fakir, no! No, please, please don’t –” She burst through the trees seconds behind him. “I –”

But she was too late.

Fakir was already gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO NAUGHTY CHILDREN, IT'S CLIFFHANGER TIME
> 
> it's also reveal time! namely, this is the chapter in which I reveal a lot of stuff, and also that this story has been a retelling of the Scottish ballad Tam Lin the entire time. I know not everyone is as familiar with it as I am (I'm a big nerd, okay?), and so [here](http://www.tam-lin.org/index.html) is the site where I gathered the bulk of my information for various uses in the story, though be warned that it _will_ spoil you for what is to come next in this fic. additionally, if you have any thoughts or questions about this aspect of the story, I would love to hear them either in comments here, or feel free also to contact me at my tumblr (ballerinaduck.tumblr.com). thanks for reading this far, I hope you'll stick with it to its conclusion!


	29. Chapter 29

Moonlight poured in through a gap in the trees, a single broad shaft that illuminated the small clearing just enough to see to the shadowy edges. In a perfect circle around the earth it touched grew a ring of mushrooms, each one spaced the same distance apart from each other. They were large and long-stemmed, with bell-shaped caps thinly coated in dew that glinted dully in the light. Ahiru stared at it all, and even in her half-numb and horrified state her brain quickly put everything together.

This was a fairy ring. Fakir had stepped into it, and now she would never see him again. They’d never go riding again, never share meals again, never dance together again, never… so many nevers.  The weight of them came crashing down on her all at once, and she staggered, wobbled, and then crumpled to her knees on the ground. Her vision blurred as fresh tears filled her eyes, turning the moonlit clearing into a haze of white amidst darkness. Ahiru clapped her hands to her mouth to try and stifle her sobs as she didn’t want any forest creatures or wandering fairies to be alerted to her presence, but a few managed to escape her as she cried and cried.

When at last her tears seemed to dry up, she wiped at her wet face and rose unsteadily to her feet. Ahiru stared at the fairy ring for a minute even after standing up; her lower lip wobbled and she let out a few little quack-like hiccups, but her eyes didn’t water much. The thought of venturing into the fairy ring herself, of chasing him down and pulling him out and running away, had certainly occurred to her as she wept, but she’d squashed it down as foolish and impractical. What chance did she have against the whole of the Fairy Realm, and the King himself? Especially when Fakir was too stubborn to even try escaping, lest he endanger those he cared about. Her sorrow now ran deeper than tears, deeper than words, and all she felt was buried beneath a thick layer of numbness, almost disconnection.

She stared for a minute more, and then Ahiru turned and began to walk back the way she’d come. She had no knowledge of the hour as she hadn’t bothered looking at her clock before fleeing the house in pursuit of Fakir, but she didn’t really care about that, nor about the dirt on her bare foot. She simply walked, in something of a daze, the way she vaguely remembered going on her way in here. It wasn’t too far, so she didn’t think it would take too long anyway, and it was hard to feel fear right now. It was hard to feel anything at all right now.

It took her longer than she’d estimated but Ahiru did eventually emerge from the woods, and saw the house in front of her. She halted for a long moment, and then resumed her trip inside. In the hallway she went past her own door and walked over to Fakir’s; she laid her hand on it, and leaned her head against it too, and her shoulders shook with the sobs threatening to rise up in her again. She stood there for a few minutes before turning and going back into her own room. And though she could barely see, Ahiru changed into a fresh nightgown and wiped off her dirty foot before climbing back into bed, her movements stiff and mechanical. Once under the covers she turned on her side, curled up into a ball, and cried again until she fell asleep.

She didn’t wake up until well past sunrise. A look at her clock revealed it was a little bit past eight in the morning; she rolled back over and stared at the ceiling with a sigh. If Edel had gotten home from Ebine’s already, no doubt she’d be worried about her rising so late; she couldn’t bear to face her or anyone else yet, though. She stayed in bed for fifteen more minutes or so before the rumblings of her stomach grew to be too much to ignore. Putting on her spare slippers and her old robe she padded off to the kitchen, dragging her feet all the way.

Edel wasn’t there, though, so Ahiru stood at the door for several seconds and then walked on in and started heating up some water for tea. Despite her hunger she didn’t actually feel much like eating, and the thought of cold cuts and cheese made her stomach churn. Instead she warmed up some bread and slathered on butter, jam, and honey, nibbling on them between sips of tea.

She had nearly finished breakfast when she heard the far-off sound of the front door opening. Ahiru’s eyes went wide and her heart started racing, and she almost knocked over her chair in her haste to be up and running towards the noise. Hope surged wildly in her as she dashed down the hall –

– only to be crushed as she saw Edel hanging up her cloak. Edel looked over at her, and smiled. “Morning, Ahiru – I’ve had breakfast already so –”

“E… Edel…” Ahiru wavered for a moment, and then burst into tears. She’d hoped, she’d _so_ hoped – but no, it had been a foolish idea from the start.

“Ahiru?” Edel’s smile faded, replaced by a look of alarm. “What’s wrong?”

“I… I…” Ahiru shook her head, barely able to form words.

“Here. Let’s go to the kitchen.” Edel put her arm around Ahiru and gently led her back to the kitchen. She sat the still-sobbing Ahiru down, looked around at the kitchen, and then set about making a fresh cup of tea.

Ahiru’s tears had more or less subsided by the time Edel handed her the cup of tea, and she nodded at her. “Th-thank you…”

“Of course. Now…” Edel sat down next to Ahiru, having turned the chair to face her. “Tell me what’s happened. And also…” She frowned. “Where’s Fakir? I know he doesn’t have work today.”

“He… he…” Fresh sobs threatened to overwhelm Ahiru at the mention of his name, but she fought them off. “Th-that’s… that’s what’s wrong, he… he went into the forest l-last night, and… and…”

“Into the forest? At _night?_ ” Edel looked incredulous. “Forgive me my disbelief, it’s… well, that isn’t like Fakir at _all._ ”

“N-no, it’s… I was surprised too.” Ahiru hiccupped. “I – I woke up after we went to bed, and… I heard him walk by, a-and then I heard the back door, and I looked out the window, and he was going towards the woods, and…” Another hiccup. “I got out of bed and I followed him cause that seemed so weird…”

“I see.” Edel nodded. “And? What happened next?”

“W-well, I… I called out to him, and he didn’t look happy at all that I was following him, and he tried walking faster and told me to go home, but I wouldn’t, I just kept running after him, and finally he slowed down and I caught up and he said…” She took a shaky breath, her eyes filling with tears, and when she spoke again, her voice cracked. “He – he said he… he said he was going to… to die…”

“ _What?_ ” Edel gaped at her. “What… what in the world did he mean by _that?_ Did he tell you?”

“Y-yeah.” Ahiru nodded. “He – he said… he said it started last year, when Prince Siegfried went into a fairy ring… cause he met Rue there, Rue’s human, but she was given to the Fairy King a really long time ago because of the border agreement, that really _was_ a true story… b-but the Fairy King didn’t want them to get married so he said that Siegfried would have to die a year later, but Fakir…” Ahiru made a whimpering noise, and the tears started slipping down her cheeks. “Fakir… volunteered to take his place so… so that’s what he was going off to do, there’s a fairy ring he went into, and… and tonight at midnight they’re going to… to…” She broke off, a sob escaping her.

“Oh… oh gods…” Edel bowed her head. “I…” She took a deep breath. “I did think… well… sometimes he acted strange, and I wondered if something was burdening him that he couldn’t tell anyone about, but… I never would’ve guessed _this._ ” She shook her head. “The _Fairy King_ …”

“He – he said…” Ahiru hiccupped. “That we met him… after the naming ceremony. That was him outside the p-palace.”

“It _was?_ ” Edel looked up, her eyes wide. “That… that makes sense but…” She gave her head a quick little shake. “I am glad now that I was not rude to him, because that…” She shuddered. “But anyway, there…” She stood up. “Come on. We’re going to the library – bring your tea if you want.”

“Wh-what?” Ahiru followed her, tea cup in hand. “Why the library?”

“Because there are legends a-plenty about people rescuing loved ones from the clutches of the fairies.” Edel opened the door for her as they reached the library. “I’m going to consult a book I know that has documented those stories, and see what we can find. Doesn’t matter if they’re considered to be true or not. After all, look at how the story of a child given to the Fairy King as part of the border arrangement turned out to be true despite some people’s belief otherwise.” She sighed.

“Oh… okay…” Ahiru swallowed. “Do – do you need me to help?”

“No, that’s all right.” Edel ushered her over to an armchair. “Just sit, and finish your tea. I know what book I need, so this shouldn’t take long.”

“Okay…” Ahiru sat down. She took a deep breath, and let it out, and slowly sipped her tea while Edel built a fire in the fireplace and then headed off to procure the necessary book. It took only a few minutes before Edel came back over and sat down in a nearby armchair, with a single large tome in her arms. With a jolt, Ahiru realized that she’d read that one before – or at least part of it. She’d consulted it on changeling legends some months back. And, if she remembered correctly, she’d closed it when she got to the exact bit they needed now. Guilt squirmed around in her stomach, despite that she rationally knew that she couldn’t have had any idea back then of what had been going on with Fakir all this time.

Edel checked the table of contents, and then flipped through to the correct section. “Hmmm… some of these… damn, I _know_ there’s one with a situation similar to this…” She frowned down at the book and moved on to the next page. “If I could just… aha!” She nodded. “This is it!”

“Wh-what’s that story about?” Ahiru leaned over, trying to see.

“It’s about a girl whose true love was stolen by the fairies, intended for execution on the night of Halloween… much like Fakir will be.” Edel frowned again. “The difference is, he told her where it would happen, and so she was able to make it there on her own without having to do what we’re doing, and she saved him.”

“Oh… he…” Ahiru’s face fell. “So… we don’t know where it’ll happen, and… and so I can’t…” Her eyes started to fill again.

“That’s not what I said,” Edel said gently. “We _do_ know, from her story, where it will take place. They will ride through the crossroads – the very ones you passed through when you first came here – and he will be on a white horse at the back of the company. You must pull him down, and hold fast to him no matter what he turns into. Only if you keep your grip true will you win him back.”

Ahiru stared. “Wh-what… what he _turns into?_ ”

“Yes.” Edel nodded. “The fairies won’t make it easy for you. The Fairy King will undoubtedly see Fakir as his property now, as he did with poor Rue, and will not want you to take him away. So he’ll transform him in your arms to various beasts. He won’t try to harm you, but he will be struggling, and it’s a good bet that at least one form will be hard to hold onto. But Ahiru, you must – you must hold him tightly until he returns to his own true shape. Only then will he truly be free and safe.”

“Oh… okay…” Ahiru swallowed. “A-and I have to be there by midnight, right?”

“Yes.” Edel glanced down at the book. “I would get there a bit early if I were you, just to be sure, but yes – around midnight they will ride through the crossroads, and you must watch for him, and do what I have told you.” She closed the book. “Do you think you can do this?”

“Y-yes. I…” Ahiru wiped at her eyes. “I… I really want to save him, I… I don’t want to lose him…”

Edel studied her for a moment. “You love him, don’t you?”

“Yes,” Ahiru whispered. “I… how did you know?”

“I had guessed some time ago, but I wasn’t sure.” Edel brushed some hair out of her face. “Not, of course, that it is strictly necessary to be in love with a person in order to save them… but this does make the parallel between your situation and that of the girl in the story all the stronger.” She sighed. “It will be dangerous, Ahiru – the fairies are not to be trifled with, particularly their King, and there is no guarantee you will prevail like that other girl did.”

“I – I know, but…” Ahiru shook her head. “I can’t just give up without trying! I can’t just say it’s impossible and not do anything, not when Fakir could… I can’t abandon him!”

“I know. I know you wouldn’t,” Edel said soothingly. “I just want to make sure you understand the risks. Have faith in yourself, but don’t allow overconfidence to best you – it has been the downfall of many throughout history.”

“I – I know.” Ahiru nodded. “A-and I… well, I’m not usually very confident at all, so I won’t really be _over_ confident this time either.” She gave a small, watery laugh, and Edel smiled back at her. “I just… I just know that I have to try, and I’ll try my best, because… because Fakir needs me to.”

“Well said.” Edel smiled again. “I have the utmost faith in you, Ahiru – I believe that you can save him.” She glanced at the clock on the mantel, even as Ahiru blushed. “For now, though… we must wait until it’s time.”

Ahiru frowned. “There’s… there’s no other way? I – I can’t just… go in there and get him out? There’s no spell or anything to let me pass through undetected?”

“I’m afraid not.” Edel shook her head. “The fairies’ power is beyond human comprehension and cannot be fought against with magic. Only iron can keep them at bay, but even with it in hand, if you ventured into their realm you could not hold off a host of fairies for very long before you were overwhelmed. So you would be on your own. And even if you managed to avoid capture or harm, even if you managed to find him and escape… by their laws his pledge to die at the appointed time is still binding. Great ruin would come to you both sooner or later.” She looked down at her hands. “And… it is more likely… I think… that you would be captured and brought before the Fairy King, and offered a terrible bargain: your life in exchange for his.”

“My… my life?” Ahiru paled. “He – he’d ask that of me? To save Fakir?”

“Yes. Or, alternately, he might ask for your freedom. You might be forced to serve decades in his court, never able to visit the human world during that time… and released long after everyone you know is dead and gone.” Edel stared into the fire. “Either way… you and Fakir would be forever separated.”

“N-no…” Ahiru whimpered. “I – I don’t want either of those… dying to save him wouldn’t solve anything, and living all those years apart from each other, with him dying alone here…” Her voice shook. “Th-that’s too sad!”

“Precisely.” Edel nodded. “The only option that allows for you both to survive this night and live peaceful lives thereafter is for you to do as that other girl did long ago. With a heart full of courage, you must advance to the crossroads and take hold of him, and not let go no matter what he changes into, as I told you just now.”

“Y-yeah, I…” Ahiru stared down at the cup in her hands. “It – it’s scary… and I’m weak… but I think I can be strong for Fakir..” She swallowed. “I just hope I can do it…”

“I believe you can. And I also believe that you are stronger than you think.” Edel set the book aside. “You _will_ save him. I know it.”

“I – I’ll do my best!” Ahiru’s fingers tightened around the cup. “Cause… cause it’s not just for me, I know you and Charon are depending on me too to save him… I – I promise I won’t let you down! I won’t let Fakir or anyone down…” Her small face set into a determined expression. “No matter what, I will _definitely_ save him.”

She knew they were bold words. But for everyone’s sake – Fakir’s most of all – she had to be true to them.


	30. Chapter 30

The rest of the day seemed to drag on interminably; Ahiru whiled away the long hours as best she could, but what awaited her later that night never left her mind. It hovered always at the edges of whatever she did. She tried at first to distract herself as a means to reduce the anxiety bubbling up in her stomach, but when it didn’t work she gave up and just kept herself occupied with whatever she could find. Eventually she bathed and dressed herself and redid her hair, and helped Edel with minor tasks around the house and in the garden. She straightened up her room and dusted the library and did inventory, and reread the story in that book, the one she was meant to emulate if she was to save Fakir, over and over in a bid to bolster her courage and confidence. It was the only thing she _could_ read in the state she was in – she simply couldn’t concentrate on anything else, not with Fakir’s situation intruding on her mind every minute. Eating was difficult too, and could barely be managed, but she got some food down anyway, knowing she would need all her strength for what was to come.

The time between dinner and the fateful hour was, perhaps, the worst of all to endure, for her chance to save him seemed so close and also so far away. Yet all the same it did pass by, and before she knew it Edel was leading her to the front door.

“Take this with you to see by.” Edel held out the small lantern, which she’d already lit. “But douse it when you reach the crossroads – it would not do to alert the fairies to your presence before you have sprung out of the shadows to pull Fakir off his horse.”

“Y-yeah, good idea.” Ahiru took it from her. “A-anything else I need?”

“Only your strength and will to save him.” Edel touched her cheek. “You’ve been reading that story all day; you know that that girl brought only what was in her heart to rescue her beloved, and succeeded. You are no less capable.”

“I…” Ahiru blinked back tears. “I hope so…”

“I _know_ that you are,” Edel said, firmly but gently. “Draw strength from my knowledge, Ahiru, believe in yourself, and bring him home safely.”

“I – I will!” Ahiru nodded. “I promise!”

“I know.” Edel pulled Ahiru’s hood up. “Go now, and fortune and your own courage be with you.”

“Bye!” Ahiru opened the door, and turned back just as she stepped out. “I – _we’ll_ be back later!”

“I’ll wait up, then.” Edel smiled, and waved at her. Ahiru waved back, and then took off up the path.

The moon was high in the sky as Ahiru made her way to the crossroads; tomorrow night it would begin to wane,  but tonight it was still at peak fullness, and she used it in combination with her small lantern to see by. Some clouds had gathered, but they obscured only the stars, never daring to pass in front of the moon or grow too great in number. No, this would be a clear night, undoubtedly just as the fairies would wish for, for such a thing as they intended to do. But if she had anything to say about it, their intentions would come to naught.

Ahiru quickened her pace as she drew near, into something of a run. Thus far in her life the only time she had stood at these crossroads had been when bandits had waylaid her coach, that first day in Goldkrone. Fakir had saved her back then. Now it was her turn to save him, and she would _not_ fail.

The crossroads were dark and silent when she reached them, with no living being in sight. She could hear only her own breathing and footsteps, the birds and animals apparently having fled the area for the night; perhaps they knew they weren’t meant to be here. Ahiru paused and stood for a moment, looking around for what could be the best hiding spot. She tried hiding behind a couple of bushes, but found that her hair stuck up over them, and would give her away. As that didn’t seem wise to do she settled for ducking behind a nearby tree. Its trunk was just wide enough to hide her, and she would be able to peek around it to watch the procession going by, hopefully without being spotted. Ahiru nodded to herself, and then doused the lamp, leaving her in darkness save for the light of the moon up above. Now came the hard part: more waiting.

The eerie quiet seemed to stretch into infinity, and after a while Ahiru’s heart began to thump with the fear that she had come too late, or they’d read the wrong tale and she’d walked to the wrong place. A million different nightmare scenarios in which she never saw Fakir again played out in her head. But finally, _finally_ , a wind stirred the leaves of the trees, and as she felt it against her skin it seemed to her that the night finally came alive, with sounds and sights meant for no mortal ears or eyes. Orbs of light twinkled into existence on the horizon, and as they drew closer she began to hear the whispering and singing of the fairies. She couldn’t understand their language, but their voices alone made her hair stand on end and her blood run cold in her veins. The lights revealed themselves to be torches carried by the procession as they rode by on their horses; at its head was the Fairy King himself, carrying no torch and wearing a black mask with a golden beak that glinted beneath the moon. Everyone else wore similar masks, though their beaks were made of silver, and their clothes were nearly as fine as those of their King.

All, that is, except for the man riding on the white horse at the very end of the line. Fakir’s head was bowed, and his unbound hair obscured his expression, but it was nevertheless clear to see that he wore no mask. Ahiru’s heart started pounding even harder as she saw him, and she had to force herself to keep her breathing quiet lest the fairies hear her. She couldn’t see Fakir’s full face, but no beak protruded from the long hair that fell around it, and nothing was tied around his head. His shoulders were slumped, and clad in similar finery to the rest of them, and he seemed to be shaking as well. Ahiru’s hands tightened on the tree trunk, and she waited only until his horse had just barely passed her, moving into the very center of the crossroads, before running out to him.

“Fakir!” She grabbed his arm, and began to tug as hard as she could. “Come on!”

“Ahiru?” He turned to look at her, and she saw something she didn’t recognize flit across his face before horror set in. “No – you shouldn’t – go home!”

“Sh-shut up! I’m going to save you!” She pulled harder. “Come _on!_ ”

“Ahiru, no! They’ll – please, just _go home!_ ” He tried to pull his arm out of her grasp.

“N-no, I won’t! Just – just sh-shut up and come on!” They struggled, and at first Ahiru feared that she wouldn’t be able to pull him off the horse – he was bigger and stronger than she was, after all. But she finally prevailed, and he fell forward even as she stumbled back. They landed on the ground together, Ahiru on her back and Fakir atop her. For a wild moment they both stared at each other, breathing heavily after their tussle, and then Fakir rolled off her and sat up. He undoubtedly would’ve gotten to his feet next, but Ahiru moved too quickly, pulling herself up enough to fling herself at him and wrap her arms around him. “No! I’m not letting go!”

Fakir opened his mouth to protest, but no sound came out. He seemed to try unsuccessfully to speak, his efforts ultimately cut off when his body shuddered and then transformed into that of a donkey. Ahiru was forced to stand with him as he rose to his feet, but kept her arms fastened around his neck, holding on tightly even though he struggled and tried to back away from her, braying wildly. He settled down after two minutes that felt more like two hours, but this was only so he could pass on into the next shape. Ahiru felt the beast that had been Fakir shuddering again, and she braced herself.

He shrank into her arms, and nearly slipped out of them as the hairy skin of the donkey turned into the smooth scales of a snake. Ahiru managed to keep a tight grip on him, and stared into his slit-pupiled eyes as he thrashed and hissed, willing him to calm himself and stop fighting her, to just let her do this. He bared his fangs, long and sharp, but made no move to bite her, and slowly, slowly, his struggles began to still. Ahiru knew that it was only the calm before the next storm, however.

The shudder went through Fakir again, and as the scales turned once more into fur and his body enlarged it was all Ahiru could do to keep hold of him. She managed though, and clung to the middle of an enormous bear as it roared and tried to shake her off. She would not be dislodged, though, clutching at the fur with her tiny fingers and embracing him with all the strength in her body. He clawed uselessly at the air and roared again, but she did not fear that he would hurt her in any way. For as wild as these beasts seemed, somewhere inside them was Fakir, and Fakir would never willingly cause harm to her. Indeed, it seemed more as if he was simply trying to get away from her, out of fear that the fairies would take control of him and force him to injure or kill her.

His next form was smaller, but no less strong – a swan fighting with its mighty wings to get out of her arms. A true swan would have been able to break her arms, would have pecked at her eyes, her skin, but Fakir’s struggles seemed to be weaker this time, as if he was trying to escape while also attempting to hold back the destructive capabilities of this body as much as he could at the same time. He didn’t like swans, Ahiru found herself remembering – he’d talked dismissively once about how they were romanticized as being beautiful and graceful, their viciousness and violence ignored. So he would know to be especially careful with her like this.

He must, then, have been relieved to find himself next in the shape of a toad, squirming and sliding in her hands. Slippery though he was, there was no chance of him harming her, and he merely tried to make her hands lose their grip on him. Ahiru held him tightly, though, and shook her head slightly as she looked down into his eyes. Not until he was safe and himself again would she let go, and she promised him this without words spoken.

But as the bear had followed the snake, forcing her to act quickly lest she let go of the larger animal that the smaller one had transformed to, so too did a lion follow the toad. For one horrible split-second Ahiru feared that she would lose her grip on Fakir, but she managed to keep her arms tightly around his neck, and buried her face in his mane as he roared and bellowed into the night. He pawed at the ground as he kept up his attempts to be set loose, and she couldn’t see his claws nor his teeth, but she didn’t need to – they’d come this far, she knew he wouldn’t hurt her, her trust in him was without end. All she had to do was to keep holding on, no matter how many things they turned him into, and she had no intention of letting go.

And as she clung to him, his body shuddered and changed again. But this time she felt human skin against herself, and it was his soft dark hair that slid through her fingers as Fakir resumed his true form. Ahiru pulled back just enough to look up at him, and saw in the light of the torches and the moon that all the blood seemed to have drained from his face, and he stared straight ahead of him, his eyes blank and empty. His knees shook, and then gave out completely. She dropped down beside him as he sank into a kneeling position, refusing to let go of him even now. The fairy clothes he’d worn earlier were gone, leaving him entirely bare to the night, but she could not feel mortified about seeing him so, and merely pressed her face to his neck as tentative relief began to trickle in. Was it over?

“Wretch!” They both looked up to see that the Fairy King had ridden back to them from the front of the procession. His scarlet eyes blazing, he ripped off his mask so that he could direct his full fury at them in a powerful glare. Ahiru shrank a little, recognizing him as indeed being the man they’d met outside the castle that day, though his face was distorted by the towering rage he was in. “Did I not say that you were to tell no living soul? That you especially should not speak of this to _her?_ ” He pointed one long, talon-like finger at Ahiru, who still had her arms around Fakir but had pulled herself back just enough to turn round and see the Fairy King.

“I…” Fakir’s voice sounded croaky and strange, and his mouth opened and closed a few times. “I… aaahhh…”

“Alas that I did not do more than warn you!” The Fairy King spat on the ground. “I should have cut out your tongue and replaced it with a strip of cloth, that you might not have brought me to this as that other did! And how I wish I had!” He shook his head slowly, still glowering at them. “Know this, humans – you are free to live out the rest of your pitiful mortal lives from this point forward. But keep strictly to your borders, and never again meddle with me and mine else your peaceful existences be forfeit.”

He tugged on the reins, and with a shout in that strange language led the rest of his company out of the crossroads and into the night. Only when they had fully gone did Fakir truly move of his own volition, throwing his arms around Ahiru and clutching her to him. He was trembling violently, his breathing loud and erratic, and she could feel his heart pounding. Tears threatened to overwhelm her, but she held them back and buried her face in the crook of his neck, taking a deep breath and letting it out while he clung to her as tightly as she’d clung to him through his transformations. That it was over and he was safe barely seemed real, and they did nothing for several minutes but remain in that position, just holding each other.

After a while, though, Ahiru pulled back to look at him. It was harder to tell with only moonlight to see by, but he still seemed to be washed-out, and his eyes looked unfocused and haunted. She brushed some hair away from his face, and spoke softly. “Fakir? How do you feel?”

“I…” He sounded just as hoarse as he had when he’d struggled to speak to the Fairy King, and after a beat shook his head slightly. “I… I… I c…”

“You can’t really talk right now? After what happened to you?” Ahiru guessed. Fakir shook his head again, and a look of guilt flashed across his face. “No, no… don’t be sorry. Please.” She touched his cheek. “I know that must have been horrible for you to go through.”

“I…” Fakir trailed off, making something of a whimpering noise, and he shuddered and closed his eyes.

“It’s okay.” Ahiru embraced him again, and gently stroked his hair. “You don’t have to talk, it’s okay… I understand.”

“Ah…” Fakir drew a shaky breath. “Ahi… ru…”

“Shhh, shhhh…” Ahiru rubbed his back, and heard him make an odd noise that almost sounded like a sob. “It’s okay… it’s okay… you’re okay now… let’s just go back home so you can rest…”

She let go of him, and helped him stand up. Ahiru then took off her cloak and held it out wordlessly, feeling her cheeks heat up. Fakir stared uncomprehendingly at it for a second before his state of undress finally seemed to dawn on him; his face regained a little of its color as he blushed and turned away after snatching the cloak from her hands. Ahiru almost wanted to giggle at this slight glimpse of Fakir’s usual self, but she pushed down the urge. He covered himself as best he could with her cloak and then they began to walk home. This time it was Ahiru who had to match her pace to his, for he was still sluggish and weak in the aftermath of his transformations, and if she hadn’t been sure that his weight would make her stagger and fall she would’ve tried to support him as they walked. So instead she simply held his hand, which seemed to comfort him.

They didn’t let go of each other until they got into the house. The door had just barely shut behind them when Edel appeared; just one look at their faces must have told her everything she needed to know, for she drew them into a wordless hug before ushering them off to the kitchen. She pressed cups of steaming chamomile tea on both of them, and then urged them back to their bedrooms to sleep, for it had been a very long day and night for both.

Ahiru agreed, and started to go into her room, but Edel stopped her before she could close her door. “Ahiru?”

“Edel?” Ahiru peeked back out. “What is it?”

“… Thank you.” Edel’s voice was very quiet. “Thank you so much.”

“O-oh… I…” Ahiru’s face warmed. “Y-you’re welcome… goodnight…”

“Goodnight.”

Ahiru closed her door, and went over to her table. She set down her cup of tea and lit a fire in the hearth, and while she sat and sipped she listened to Fakir moving about his room. Undoubtedly he was changing into something to sleep in, and probably cleaning any dirt off himself as well, where he’d sat on the ground in nothing at all, not to mention walking back barefoot. She wished she could go in there and do something for him, like brush his hair, because it surely would have been soothing to him to be gently touched and comforted, reminded of his humanity. It was obvious that being transformed against his will had been terrifying for him, that he had derived great fear and trauma from losing control of his own body. Right now she wanted nothing more than to hold him and tell him it was all right, that he was safe, and her heart ached over what he must be going through… but as he hadn’t asked her for anything she had to respect his wishes and his privacy.

And they both needed their rest anyway. Indeed, the more tea she drank the drowsier she became, all the pent up energy and fear and anxiety finally melting away and letting her relax. Ahiru was yawning by the time she finished it, and had to reluctantly pull herself up so she could change into a nightgown. Fakir had gone quiet already, and she hoped he’d fallen asleep and wouldn’t have nightmares. She herself fell asleep soon after she crawled into bed, resolving that they would talk tomorrow if he felt up to it by then.

After all, she had so much to tell him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As there are many different versions of Tam Lin in existence, so too does it follow that there are many variations on the transformation cycle that the eponymous character goes through. Instead of simply taking one from a particular version, I looked at a chart of all the different things used over various incarnations of the ballad, and created a cycle of my own that suited me by choosing particular animals I thought would work well. I also foreshadowed it way back in chapter ten - the masks worn by the people who force Ahiru into dancing with them are those of the animals Fakir will turn into one year later, ending of course with Fakir himself, bare-faced, pulling her out of the dance.


	31. Chapter 31

Rain streamed down Ahiru’s window, distorting her view of the world outside; in the dark, wet glass she could see a pale outline of her own face, like a ghost standing in the middle of the downpour. The trees waved a little in the slight wind, and were briefly illuminated by a flash of light that lasted only as long as it took her to blink, if that. Ahiru braced herself for thunder – after all, a roll of it loud enough to rattle her shutters had awoken her only a short while ago – but relaxed as what followed was soft and distant, as though the storm was grumbling to itself rather than shouting at everyone.

She watched for a few minutes longer, and then reluctantly unwrapped her quilt from around her shoulders and got up to ready herself for the day. It was already past the time when she usually headed to the kitchen, and had been when she woke up, in fact. There was nowhere to go and no lessons for the day, so it wasn’t like she had to keep to her usual schedule, but her stomach was making pitiful noises at her, begging her to fill the empty void with some warm food, and so Ahiru would obey, despite being otherwise perfectly comfortable in her bed listening to the rain.

Oh well. It wasn’t like she couldn’t listen to it in the kitchen too, and she’d have the crackling of the fire in the hearth as well. That thought cheered her. Today was… it was a day she wanted to take slowly, the only thing on the agenda being a conversation with Fakir. Provided he was up for it, of course – after his traumatic experience the previous night, he might not be ready for discussing anything yet. Either way, though, she felt like she needed a quiet day at home. It would always be hard for her to say she _deserved_ something, and she especially didn’t want to make herself out to be _entitled_ to something for what she’d done last night, but she didn’t mind admitting that after all the pain and fear yesterday she _needed_ this one little thing.

The first thing she did was tie her robe on over her nightgown; she didn’t quite feel like getting dressed yet, after all, and somehow she couldn’t feel awkward anymore about Fakir seeing her in just those two things. It wasn’t like she wasn’t covered up, after all, and right now he was the one with more to be embarrassed about, given that she’d seen him completely unclothed last night. It hadn’t been in an alluring context at all, of course, and she’d kept her gaze where it belonged, but still – she wouldn’t blame him if he had trouble looking her in the eye for a while or blushed more than usual. Certainly, it was what she would do were their positions reversed.

While she washed her face, she started to hear sounds from next door, of Fakir moving around his room. Ahiru’s eyes closed for a moment, and she took a deep breath that she let out slowly as her mouth curved up into a little smile. She hadn’t realized it before, but just that noise was relieving to hear. Waking up yesterday had been _horrible_ – she’d known the house was completely empty, and _why_ there was no one in the room beside hers, and that had lent an eerie loneliness to the quiet. She didn’t know if Edel was home right now, but Fakir was here, and he wasn’t going to go anywhere anymore that he couldn’t come back from, and that made such a difference to her state of mind.

He was out of his room and into the kitchen before she finished with what she needed to do, but she followed not long after. When she got there she found him sitting in front of the hearth, feeding what looked like folded up sheets of paper into the fire he’d built up. Ahiru watched him for a second, and then spoke. “Fakir?”

He turned at her voice, and she saw that he’d regained his normal color, but still looked a bit tired. “Hey, Ahiru.” Just as she’d guessed he might, he seemed to blush a little at the sight of her, though he _did_ manage to look her in the eye.

“Wh-what are you doing?” She took a couple steps forward. “What are those?”

“Letters.” He turned back to the hearth and let the flames consume another sheet of paper. “I wrote them to all the important people in my life, intending for them to be found after I’d – after I’d gone.”

“Oh, that makes sense.” She studied him – he hadn’t bothered to put anything on over his sleep shirt and pants, but his hair was neatly tied back. “Did – did you write one to me?”

“I…” Fakir turned to look at her again, an odd sort of expression on his face – it was like a frown, but incredulous at the same time, as though he couldn’t quite believe she’d asked him that. “Of course I did, I… why would you think I wouldn’t?”

“I – I don’t know, I just…” She clasped her hands behind her back and scuffed her foot on the kitchen floor. “It – it’s not that I thought you didn’t, I just… sorry.”

“It’s all right.” He turned back again and tossed a couple more letters into the hearth. “You don’t have to apologize.”

“O-okay.” Ahiru walked further into the kitchen, pausing by the counter. She gazed at Fakir’s profile as he put the last of the stack of letters in the flames and watched them burn. “S-so, um… is it okay if I ask… what’d you say in mine? Just – just curious.”

“I explained the situation to you.” Fakir shifted slightly in his seat. “And thanked you for being such a good friend to me this past year, and apologized and said goodbye.”

“… Oh.” Her gaze fell to the floor, and she toyed uselessly with the sash of her robe. “Ah… so… um… a-are you hungry? I’ll make breakfast for both of us, if you want…”

“Yeah.” Fakir nodded. “That sounds good. Though… I don’t think I could stomach anything besides toast and hot cereal right now.” He shuddered slightly.

“Okay.” Ahiru started boiling the water for hot cereal first, and while it heated up she fetched out everything she’d need. The grain she set by the stove, along with the spices she’d use to flavor it and the bread for slicing and toasting, and then carried the honey and jam over to the table. It was there that she found a note she hadn’t previously seen, and after setting the jars down picked it up and read it. “Oh… Edel’s not here, she said she’s gone to Ebine’s for the day to… to let us talk. Whatever that means.” She frowned, blushing and wishing she’d bothered to read it all the way through quietly so that she could’ve come up with something different to say instead of what Edel had actually written. How embarrassing.

“Oh.” Fakir shifted in his seat. “I figured she’d left already for something, but didn’t see the note…”

“I didn’t see it either till now.” Ahiru crumpled it up and tossed it into the fire as she headed back to get the butter dish and some cutlery for them. “I hope she’s all right in the rain… a-and are you okay, being stuck here with just me all day?”

“Ahiru, I…” He frowned and shook his head. “Don’t say things like that. It’s never… I would never think of it as being stuck with you. You…” He looked down at his hands where they rested in his lap. “To be honest, I… even though I never told anyone what was going on before I left, I don’t feel ready to face other people just yet, not today. Only you. I only feel up to talking to you.” He rubbed the scar on the back of his right hand. “Maybe she could tell I’d be like this today, or guessed, and that’s why she left.”

“O-oh.” Ahiru tried to swallow past the lump in her throat. “O-okay… then… w-well, I – I better start boiling the grain…” She turned away to measure it out, just in time to hide the first tear that trickled down her face. She took a deep breath to steady herself, and dashed at her eyes surreptitiously with her robe’s sleeve before rolling said sleeves up so she could start cooking. She added in what  seemed like enough grain to feed both of them, and stirred in some cinnamon, nutmeg, and ground cloves for flavoring. After that she put some water on for tea, and when she’d composed herself enough took the butter, knives, and spoons over to the table. A pitcher of cream came next, and then she returned to the stove to stir the cereal, slice the bread, and measure the tea.

Fakir stayed seated at the hearth while she cooked, rising only when she was done so that he could move his chair back to the table. She turned down his offer to help, insisting that as he was still feeling somewhat poorly he should sit and relax while she took care of everything. He acquiesced to that, but when they’d finished eating, he stood up and gathered together his own dirty dishes. “No, I want to help you do this,” he said, just as she opened her mouth to protest. “I can handle washing dishes, and I don’t think it’s fair to you to ask you to do all the cooking _and_ the clean-up by yourself.” His mouth quirked into a ghost of a smile, the first she’d seen from him since before they said goodbye in the forest. “I’d insist on doing all the clean-up myself, but I know you won’t go for that, so… at least let me help you.”

“Okay.” Ahiru couldn’t help but smile back at him. “Y-you wash and I’ll dry, then.”

He agreed to that, and they both proceeded to the sink. Fakir washed all the dishes, and handed them one by one to Ahiru to dry. They worked together to put things away, Fakir handling the items that were stored too high up for her to reach, and it felt almost like a normal morning, at least for a little while. But as Ahiru wavered afterwards, wondering if it might be better to change into proper clothes before continuing to talk to him, Fakir reached out and touched her hand, and when he spoke the illusion of normality abruptly fell away. “Ahiru, wait… I…” He hesitated. “Why did… why did you save me?”

“Wh-what?” Ahiru turned to look at him, her eyes wide and her heart starting to race. “Wh-why would you… wh-what do you mean… are – are you…” Her lower lip trembled. “Are – are you… not happy that I did? Did – did you not want me to?”

“No, that – that’s not what I’m saying.” Fakir shook his head. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to imply that – I didn’t…” He swallowed. “I’m not ungrateful. Believe me. I didn’t want to die, and I’m… I don’t understand why you saved me, but I’m more thankful than I can express that you did.”

“Oh, okay.” Ahiru relaxed a little, even as she frowned. “I just – I just thought that m-maybe you were saying that… that you wanted to – that you didn’t want to be saved, cause you… that you still wanted to die for the prince cause you still love him. N-not that it’d be bad to still love him, just… I don’t think you should die for him,” she added.

“No. I’m… not in love with him anymore.” Fakir glanced away. “And I haven’t been for a while. But my feelings for him had nothing to do with it past a certain point – said point being the moment I gave my word to the Fairy King.” He sighed. “It’s like I told you that night – I went to keep you and everyone else safe. I’d given my word already and I couldn’t get out of it, no matter how much my heart had changed in the interim, despite that I’d changed my mind and learned that self-sacrificial love isn’t the ideal, that I wanted to live instead of dying for someone. It was too late for me before I’d even met you.”

“Y-yeah, I get that.” Ahiru looked down at where her hands were fiddling with her sash again. “You didn’t think you could do anything about it… I understand…”

“Yeah. Turns out there was a loophole the whole time, though.” She could hear wonder and faint disbelief in his voice. “I had no idea… how did you?”

“I – I didn’t.” Ahiru shook her head. “When – when Edel got home from Ebine’s yesterday, I told her what happened, and she said she’d heard a similar tale with a possible way of saving you in it… so we went to the library and she looked it up, and found how to do it, and so I… I went and did it.”

“Oh.” A look of dawning comprehension washed over Fakir’s face, as if two puzzle pieces had suddenly clicked together. “That… explains something the Fairy King said last night… about it not happening again… and why he…” He scowled. “Ugh…”

“Why he what?” Ahiru looked up at him, tilting her head slightly. “What’d he do?”

“He visited me a second time, after the Harvest Festival.” Fakir’s expression darkened further. “He seemed to think I was going to tell you what I’d sworn to do, and warned me not to tell _anyone_ of what was going on. I already couldn’t bring myself to be open about it with anyone, so I didn’t really think that much of it, but now I get it… he was afraid that I’d talk to someone who’d heard that legend, and set it up so  could get out of my promise.”

“That’s…” Ahiru stared at him. “But that’s not _fair!_ ”

“Well, I wouldn’t expect the Fairy King to play fair.” He took a breath and let it out. “But… he also didn’t understand me very well… he didn’t realize that I wouldn’t have asked anyone to risk themselves for my sake, because I didn’t want to put anyone I care about in harm’s way, especially when I’d made the promise of my own free will, out of my own rashness and foolish love. So that’s… that’s why I asked why you did it.” His eyes met hers, and she could see curiosity in them, as well as something else she couldn’t identify. “Not out of ingratitude, but… a need to understand why you risked yourself for me.”

“Oh… well… I…” Ahiru’s gaze dropped back down to the floor, and she twisted her hands together. “I mean… I wanted you to live, of course… I didn’t want you to die… cause… cause I…” She took a deep breath to try and steady herself, her heart thudding as she prepared herself to say the words. “I… I love you.” She swallowed. “Th-that’s… I mean… I – I know you don’t feel the same way, and I don’t expect you to, just… that was part of it, and – and, I just… I love you and I want you to live a long and happy life. That’s all.” She still couldn’t look at him, so she couldn’t tell what his expression was.

“Ahiru, I… you’re wrong. I…” He drew a shaky breath. “I _do_ love you. That’s why I… I was… more than anyone else, you were the one I was scared for the most.” His voice shook. “The thought of something happening to you… I…”

“Y-you… wh…” Ahiru’s mouth fell open, and she stared up at him. “B-but… then… wh-why… why didn’t you tell me before you left, or – or in your letter, if you were telling me the truth earlier about what you said in it?”

“I couldn’t bear to.” Fakir shook his head. “I didn’t want to… I didn’t feel right, burdening you with my feelings like that.”

“Th-that’s…” Ahiru’s lower lip quivered, and her eyes began to sting with fresh tears. “That’s so silly… no… it – it wouldn’t have been a burden, not to me, I… and you… you’re so _silly_ , thinking you couldn’t ask anyone to save you… that it would’ve been bad to ask for help instead of suffering alone… that’s so…” She made a pained little noise.

“I know.” Fakir looked away. “Ahiru, I… I’m sorry.” He sighed. “For everything. After all this, I… you’re entitled to tell me to go to hell after what I’ve put you through.”

“No, no!” Ahiru’s face crumpled, the tears running down her cheeks in earnest now. “I couldn’t, I could _never_ … I already almost lost you, I don’t want you to go away again, not ever… please don’t…”

“I won’t, then.” Fakir stepped forward and drew her into his arms like he had the night he’d left. “I’ll stay as long as you want. I promise.” He leaned his head against hers. “I won’t leave unless you ask me to.”

“I never will.” Her words were slightly muffled by his shirt. “Never ever.”

“Then I’ll stay forever.” He kissed the top of her head. “I’ll always be at your side.”

“Good.” Ahiru closed her eyes and sighed into his chest as she returned his embrace. It was so warm in his arms, as it always was, and for a few minutes they just stood there holding each other. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt so warm and safe, really. He rubbed her back and kissed the top of her head again, and it seemed as though everything was right in the world in a way it never had been before. It slowly dawned on her, though, that her hair was getting wet, and she pulled back a bit to look at him. “Fakir…” She reached up to touch his cheek. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah… sorry… I just…” He managed a smile through his ongoing tears. “It’s just that… I feel like I can _breathe_ , for the first time since I heard the Fairy King make his demand on Siegfried. I…” He let his breath out. “I’m still just so… I can barely believe this is real, that… that I get to live now, and no one else is suffering for it, and that you…” He shook his head slowly, the wonder and disbelief returning to his face. “I… get to live, and be with you?”

“Yes, you do.” A fresh lump rose in Ahiru’s throat, but she smiled and wiped away some of the tears on his cheeks. “You get to live a long, long time, and be happy, and… we get to be together.” She blushed. “It’s really real, all of it… I know it doesn’t _feel_ real, I still kind of can’t believe some of it myself… but I know it is.”

“I meant what I said that night.” Fakir’s voice was low and hoarse. “I really am glad I met you. Not just because you ended up saving me, but… even when I thought this was the last year of my life, I still just… you brought me happiness when I thought I couldn’t have any. You made it possible for me to enjoy that time, and you helped me grow into a better person just by being who you are. I never deserved to know someone as wonderful as you, but I’m grateful beyond the telling of it that I got to.”

“Shhhh, no, no.” Ahiru shook her head, and wiped at his wet face some more, not missing how he drew his breath in shakily when her thumb brushed the corner of his eye. “Don’t say that… you deserve a lot of good stuff, _all_ the good things, and I can’t be _that_ great anyway…”

“Yes, you are.” He laid his hand over hers, and leaned into her touch. “You mean so much to me… I love you more than anyone I’ve ever known…”

“I – I…” Tears threatened to overwhelm her again, but this time they were tears of joy, and she smiled through them. “I love you too, more than anybody else… and you mean a lot to me too, and I’m so glad that I came here and met you, and that I get to be with you… I would’ve been happy with being your friend and having you in my life if you didn’t feel the same way, but I’m really glad I _do_ get to be with you.”

“I don’t think you’re even half as lucky as I am, but…” Fakir took her hand off his cheek so he could kiss it. “I’ll do my best every day of my life to _keep_ making you happy. I promise.”

“Oh, Fakir…” Ahiru’s lower lip trembled, and now the tears _did_ spill over. “M-me too! I – I promise I’ll do the same thing for you, cause you deserve to be happy too, and I won’t let you argue with me about it!”

“Heh.” Fakir smiled softly, making her heart flutter. “Fine. You win this one.”

“Good!” She beamed at him. “And you better not forget it!”

“Even if I do, I’m sure you’ll remind me.” He let go of her hand, and stepped away so that he could wipe at his face; Ahiru turned her back and did the same. Outside the rain was still pouring down as hard as ever, and between it and the continued crackling of the fire Fakir’s voice was barely audible when he spoke a few moments later. “Ahiru? Could…”

“Fakir?” She turned to look at him, and saw that he’d gone a bit pink. “What is it?”

“Well, I… I… now that we’re… I was…” He swallowed. “I was wondering if – if maybe we could… if I could… can I…” His voice dropped even lower, and his cheeks reddened some more. “Can I kiss you?”

“I – oh!” Ahiru’s eyes went wide, and she felt the sudden heat of her own blush as it spread over her face. “I – I – of course! Of course, I want to, I really really want to, I – oh, but…” Her face fell. “H-how should… I mean… y-you’re so tall, I don’t know if I can reach…” She wrung her hands.

“I…” Fakir stared at her for a moment, and then his face broke into a smile so full of warmth and love and gentle amusement that it took her breath away. “I think we could manage if we tried, but if you want to make it easier this time…” He moved over to the table, turned a chair in her direction, and sat down. “How about this?”

“Oh, oh yeah, that looks better…” Her heart racing in anticipation, Ahiru walked over to stand beside him. Fakir leaned forward to meet her, slipping his arm around her waist to pull her in and leaning his forehead against hers. He smiled shyly at her and then shivered when she laid her hand on his neck. Ahiru returned his smile, mentally noting that she’d have to remember that he liked being touched there. “You ready?” she whispered.

He nodded. “Are you?”

“Yeah.”  Ahiru nodded back at him. “I am.”

“All right.”

He lifted his other hand to touch her cheek, stroking his calloused thumb over her skin and then her lower lip as well; she trembled, and her eyes fluttered shut. His hand seemed to be shaking too, and his breathing was noticeably louder and faster. Fakir hesitated for only a moment before leaning forward and kissing her lightly and chastely. Ahiru let out a sigh at that, one that was swiftly lost as he covered her mouth with his in a deeper kiss. He tasted faintly of the honey and warm spices from their breakfast, and his lips were just as soft as she’d always imagined they’d be, and just wet enough too. She returned his kiss fervently, feeling as though all the desire and love that had built up over so many months was about to overflow from within her. Love and need seemed to radiate from him too, communicated through the way he kissed her so tenderly and yet with such clear underlying passion that it made her cling to him and press closer, her heart pounding and her head feeling lighter than any feather. Fakir held her as tightly as he could despite that he was trembling with emotion, and when the tip of his tongue brushed hers between her parted lips and then swiftly retreated she thought her knees might give out from under her. When they finally managed to break apart they struggled to catch their breath, and Ahiru couldn’t even open her eyes at first. After a moment, though, she did open them, and saw that he was only just opening his as well. She drew a shaky breath. “F-Fakir…”

“Was that all right?” His expression became shy and fearful. “Did… I mean… did I… did you…”

“Of course it was.” Ahiru smiled and touched his cheek. “Oh, Fakir, you’re so silly, don’t worry about that, I… of course I liked it. I liked it a _lot_.” She blushed, and so did he. “Could… could we do it again?”

“As much as you want.” Fakir kissed her cheek. “We have all the time in the world now…”

“Yeah…” Ahiru’s smile got so wide that her face hurt, and her heart felt full to bursting with joy. “Yeah, we do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's a wrap! So many thanks to everyone who's followed along all the way to the end, whether you've commented or not - I hope you consider it worth your time to have read this giant thing. I am so grateful if you did!


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